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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,440 --> 00:00:05,519 - - I just want to say thank you so much 2 00:00:05,520 --> 00:00:08,039 for your bids and donations. 3 00:00:08,040 --> 00:00:11,439 You have all been absolutely amazing. 4 00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:14,319 And the church tower will be saved! 5 00:00:14,320 --> 00:00:17,080 CHEERING 6 00:00:20,160 --> 00:00:22,519 She really knows how to raise money, does that one. 7 00:00:22,520 --> 00:00:24,600 Oh, she's a dynamo, alrighty. 8 00:00:26,080 --> 00:00:28,079 Vicar Etta, she must be pleased. 9 00:00:28,080 --> 00:00:29,640 Well, she didn't look it. 10 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:34,359 - I'd better get back. - I'll walk you. 11 00:00:34,360 --> 00:00:40,519 How about a quick visit to Valhalla And Chips, warm the cockles? 12 00:00:40,520 --> 00:00:43,319 Come on, put your arm to bed. 13 00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:46,599 Stella must have drummed up some dosh there tonight at the auction. 14 00:00:46,600 --> 00:00:49,839 I calculate from the sales and the cash-o-meter that they will be 15 00:00:49,840 --> 00:00:53,039 in excess of 40,000 and 16 pence. 16 00:00:53,040 --> 00:00:56,879 - She'll be bob-on as well! - What a brain. 17 00:00:56,880 --> 00:00:58,760 You're going to make it, baby! 18 00:00:59,720 --> 00:01:02,800 Where did the vicar get to? She left pretty darn sharpish. 19 00:01:03,760 --> 00:01:06,079 CHURCH BELLS PEAL 20 00:01:06,080 --> 00:01:09,439 What? It's not Sunday. 21 00:01:09,440 --> 00:01:11,600 BELLS RING DISCORDANTLY 22 00:01:13,800 --> 00:01:15,720 OWL HOOTS 23 00:01:18,120 --> 00:01:19,680 Help! 24 00:01:22,120 --> 00:01:24,239 Help me! Help me! 25 00:01:24,240 --> 00:01:26,840 If you just take a step back, please. Take a step back. 26 00:01:49,240 --> 00:01:53,280 CLOCK TICKS LOUDLY 27 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:12,999 CHURCH BELLS RING Well, there they are, Robin, 28 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:18,079 the bells, just about holding up, like four shabby, ancient rugby lads 29 00:02:18,080 --> 00:02:20,839 shoulder to shoulder, encouraging each other on. 30 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:24,119 - But for how much longer? - I've seen for years it's crumbling. 31 00:02:24,120 --> 00:02:27,279 Mum was always commenting on it. She was church cleaner, you know. 32 00:02:27,280 --> 00:02:29,759 Those cobwebs wouldn't have been there back in her day. 33 00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:33,039 Sometimes I think the spider webs are the only thing holding it up. 34 00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:36,839 People keep saying that we need a social media campaign, 35 00:02:36,840 --> 00:02:39,359 and I'm hopeless, and we have no money... 36 00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:42,519 ...so I cannot thank you enough for offering up your computer skills. 37 00:02:42,520 --> 00:02:46,479 Well, since Mum passed, I spend all me time online. 38 00:02:46,480 --> 00:02:50,839 - But I'm no expert, like. - Quite frankly, anything will help. 39 00:02:50,840 --> 00:02:53,479 Er... did you get time to look at my booklet, 40 00:02:53,480 --> 00:02:56,279 A Short Introductory History Of The Churches Of Blossom Vale? 41 00:02:56,280 --> 00:02:59,199 No, sorry... No. 42 00:02:59,200 --> 00:03:01,080 Looks really interesting, though. 43 00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:03,759 Shall we? 44 00:03:03,760 --> 00:03:05,359 ORGAN PLAYS QUIETLY 45 00:03:05,360 --> 00:03:07,600 I can't get a peep out of the library. 46 00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:12,720 SOBBING 47 00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:15,480 Are you all right? 48 00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:20,879 Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 49 00:03:20,880 --> 00:03:24,359 I'm overcome. Vicar, I hope you don't mind - 50 00:03:24,360 --> 00:03:28,799 I am taking a record of my late, late ancestor, long-time vicar 51 00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:31,079 and founding father of this church, 52 00:03:31,080 --> 00:03:35,239 the right reverend Stirling Tobias Norris. 53 00:03:35,240 --> 00:03:37,559 Stella Tobias Norris. 54 00:03:37,560 --> 00:03:38,600 Pleased to meet you. 55 00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:44,879 This is Robin. He's in charge of the website for our Save The Tower fund. 56 00:03:44,880 --> 00:03:46,840 I heard about this! 57 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:54,360 It would be sacrilege for my ancestor's church to go to ruin. 58 00:03:55,320 --> 00:03:58,599 I have a calling to help, and I will. 59 00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:01,399 Though I must return to the States in a few days, 60 00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:03,759 what little time I have is yours. 61 00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:07,919 Oh, and yours, Great-Great-Great-Great-Grandpappy. 62 00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:10,040 I will not let you down. 63 00:04:17,680 --> 00:04:20,800 Here. The first stepping stone. 64 00:04:22,240 --> 00:04:24,039 Mercy! 65 00:04:24,040 --> 00:04:26,679 £10,000? I don't know what to say. 66 00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:31,439 Say nothing, Vicar. Get the word out, get the church hall ready 67 00:04:31,440 --> 00:04:36,599 for an auction, Friday. Friday! Make a miracle. 68 00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:40,599 The town has until Friday to save the tower. 69 00:04:40,600 --> 00:04:44,400 - Get on it, Robin! - Yes. My new right-hand man. 70 00:04:46,560 --> 00:04:50,519 So she is from Dixieland, this fiery fundraiser. 71 00:04:50,520 --> 00:04:52,799 Oh, yeah, all the way through. She's tall, too. 72 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:55,719 She's like a stretched-out Dolly Parton, but with jet-black hair, 73 00:04:55,720 --> 00:04:58,359 you know, like Elvis black, piled up to the sky. 74 00:04:58,360 --> 00:05:01,519 She's all over town. She's drumming up cash 75 00:05:01,520 --> 00:05:03,599 and contributions for the auction. 76 00:05:03,600 --> 00:05:06,679 You know, I was in Cath's caff having a decaf... 77 00:05:06,680 --> 00:05:11,159 - Bet she couldn't say that again! - Anyhow, I'd just missed this Stella 78 00:05:11,160 --> 00:05:14,039 but she went out with a cake stand, a cash donation and a free meal, 79 00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:17,159 - by all accounts. - So did Cath muster up a Southern delicacy? 80 00:05:17,160 --> 00:05:21,159 Oh, no. No, no, no, she wanted Spam, peas, a fried egg and chips. 81 00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:24,279 The kind of belly buster you might need to save a church tower. 82 00:05:24,280 --> 00:05:28,879 Mm. Well, the last I heard, she was in Runard's. 83 00:05:28,880 --> 00:05:31,559 Good luck with that moustachioed miser. 84 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:35,679 He still owes me for my granny's Victoriana condiment flange. 85 00:05:35,680 --> 00:05:38,840 We all know about your granny's flange. 86 00:05:43,120 --> 00:05:45,159 Oh! 87 00:05:45,160 --> 00:05:48,599 You sure have some beautiful things here, Mr Race Runard. 88 00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:52,839 Well, thank you. I find they are even more astoundingly beautiful 89 00:05:52,840 --> 00:05:57,079 - when in your orbit. - Why, thank you, kind sir! 90 00:05:57,080 --> 00:06:00,639 - My pleasure. - Now, about that matter of donating 91 00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:04,999 - one of your precious artefacts. - I only hesitate because... 92 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:09,280 Do not tell me I have to leave your heavenly emporium empty-handed. 93 00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:16,039 BELL TINKLES 94 00:06:16,040 --> 00:06:21,199 Oh, dearest Uh-Huh is here! Yet another sideys trim? 95 00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:24,680 No, erm, I actually have an important announcement. 96 00:06:25,640 --> 00:06:28,759 - There is an escaped convict on the loose. - Say what?! 97 00:06:28,760 --> 00:06:32,519 Not to panic anyone, but as we're within a 50-mile radius 98 00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:35,119 of the prison, we've been requested to ask that residents 99 00:06:35,120 --> 00:06:38,919 just keep on alert, that's all. I can't really tell you much more, 100 00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:41,599 apart from the fact that he does have quite a distinctive scar 101 00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:44,759 down his cheek. Does anyone have any questions? 102 00:06:44,760 --> 00:06:47,599 - Is he good-looking? - Is he dangerous? 103 00:06:47,600 --> 00:06:49,719 Let's just say it's probably best not to approach him 104 00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:51,599 - if you do encounter him. - What's his name? 105 00:06:51,600 --> 00:06:53,319 Well, he's not likely to give you his real name, 106 00:06:53,320 --> 00:06:56,359 but it is Ricky Matthews. But he goes by the name Zag. 107 00:06:56,360 --> 00:06:59,599 - How long has he been at large for? - Since this morning. 108 00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:01,519 BELL TINKLES 109 00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:06,919 - Her hair's still wet. - Nothing stops the Pony Express! 110 00:07:06,920 --> 00:07:09,120 Uh-huh! 111 00:07:21,080 --> 00:07:23,160 THEY GRUNT RHYTHMICALLY 112 00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:31,720 Odin! Odin! Odin! THEY GRUNT 113 00:07:39,080 --> 00:07:41,159 Valhalla! 114 00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:43,199 How do you know that chant? 115 00:07:43,200 --> 00:07:47,119 Couldn't say. Instinct, maybe? 116 00:07:47,120 --> 00:07:50,359 My momma and daddy had their DNA done - 117 00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:54,479 Daddy nothing, but Momma, it came back, well, 118 00:07:54,480 --> 00:07:56,999 100% Viking! 119 00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:59,199 No Odin-ing way! 120 00:07:59,200 --> 00:08:01,919 So a Viking stands before you. 121 00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:05,399 Or a Viking princess, as my daddy liked to brag. 122 00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:07,479 He was right. 123 00:08:07,480 --> 00:08:09,559 Stan. 124 00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:12,199 Now, if I take that, you're not going to throw me 125 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:14,879 over your shoulder, are you, and sail away with me? 126 00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:16,999 - No. - With his back? Are you kidding? 127 00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:19,759 - And he gets seasick. - Oi, watch it. 128 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:24,519 I'm collecting cash and donations for the church tower. 129 00:08:24,520 --> 00:08:28,120 Oh, well, say no more. Kev, empty that tip box into her handbag. 130 00:08:29,520 --> 00:08:31,680 Thank you, kind Norsemen. 131 00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:35,200 Oh, excuse me, boys. 132 00:08:41,080 --> 00:08:44,199 Seems like a well-established business you have here. 133 00:08:44,200 --> 00:08:46,279 - Uh-huh. - You own it outright? 134 00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:49,479 He does. This year is his final mortgage payment. 135 00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:51,919 - - Valhalla! 136 00:08:51,920 --> 00:08:55,119 Aye. It weren't easy, but it is all mine. 137 00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:57,640 You are to be congratulated. 138 00:09:01,680 --> 00:09:04,640 You never know who you're going to kiss. 139 00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:16,599 I never thought she'd come. 140 00:09:16,600 --> 00:09:21,080 - Eh? - I've been waiting for a Viking princess all my life. 141 00:09:30,640 --> 00:09:34,839 - Locks of hair. - That's all the famous people that she's cut for. 142 00:09:34,840 --> 00:09:36,959 Look here, Robin, look. 143 00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:38,679 Noddy Holder. 144 00:09:38,680 --> 00:09:40,119 Ozzy Osbourne. 145 00:09:40,120 --> 00:09:43,039 - And Cilla Black! - That's very good, yeah. 146 00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:48,039 This is an amazing collection. Might it be something that you could 147 00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:51,559 donate to the church auction? This would command a pretty penny. 148 00:09:51,560 --> 00:09:53,919 Oh, I, er... 149 00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:55,480 Wait a minute. 150 00:09:59,200 --> 00:10:01,759 RUMBLING AND BANGING 151 00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:04,519 CAT YOWLS 152 00:10:04,520 --> 00:10:06,959 BANGING AND CRASHING 153 00:10:06,960 --> 00:10:11,439 Interesting place, suspended in the seventies. 154 00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:13,039 That's our Lily. 155 00:10:13,040 --> 00:10:14,600 BICYCLE BELL RINGS 156 00:10:17,560 --> 00:10:19,839 How about this? 157 00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:23,719 Left in the yard since 1972, it seems. 158 00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:28,399 Falling apart, but a Chopper bike all the same. 159 00:10:28,400 --> 00:10:31,919 - What? - It swept the nation in the seventies. 160 00:10:31,920 --> 00:10:34,639 It's roughly based on the Hell's Angel Chopper bike, 161 00:10:34,640 --> 00:10:37,959 with its lean-back seating and its raised handlebars. 162 00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:40,719 It's a true icon of the 1970s style and rebellion. 163 00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:45,839 - What she said. - Robin, dear, will you please wheel it out 164 00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:48,760 and place it with the other offerings? 165 00:10:54,200 --> 00:10:58,319 I have commandeered him away from the computer screen for the day. 166 00:10:58,320 --> 00:11:00,479 Many hands, and all that. 167 00:11:00,480 --> 00:11:02,759 Now, can I give you a tidy-up? 168 00:11:02,760 --> 00:11:05,639 Oh, no, not at present. 169 00:11:05,640 --> 00:11:09,079 But might you be able to give dear Robin a tidy-up? 170 00:11:09,080 --> 00:11:12,679 To be an effective right-hand man, he needs styling. 171 00:11:12,680 --> 00:11:18,359 Thank you so, dear girls. Y'all put me in mind of Steel Magnolias. 172 00:11:18,360 --> 00:11:19,919 Ohhh! 173 00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:21,799 CAR HORN BEEPS Have you seen that? 174 00:11:21,800 --> 00:11:25,800 Here is Race Runard, right on cue to pick up today's haul. 175 00:11:26,840 --> 00:11:31,400 Can I presume to put Robin's coiffure down to a donation? 176 00:11:57,320 --> 00:12:00,359 Take a seat in Sir Swivel. 177 00:12:00,360 --> 00:12:03,399 Where do you go for a cut usually, Robin? 178 00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:05,639 - Myself. - I see. 179 00:12:05,640 --> 00:12:10,239 - Short back and sides. - OK... - Me and Mum had electrical hair clippers. 180 00:12:10,240 --> 00:12:12,199 How do you know Stella? 181 00:12:12,200 --> 00:12:14,919 Church met her. I'm to help her. 182 00:12:14,920 --> 00:12:16,199 What's your name? 183 00:12:16,200 --> 00:12:20,039 - Robin L Tring. - Did you write 184 00:12:20,040 --> 00:12:22,879 A Short Introductory History To The Churches Of Blossom Vale: 185 00:12:22,880 --> 00:12:24,959 - An Educational Pamphlet? - Yes! 186 00:12:24,960 --> 00:12:26,759 Oh, it's very interesting. 187 00:12:26,760 --> 00:12:28,959 I've never met anyone who's read it before. 188 00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:31,159 Oh, well, I found it online and I printed it out. 189 00:12:31,160 --> 00:12:35,479 - She printed it out! - Right, there's quite a bit of 190 00:12:35,480 --> 00:12:38,319 - Mr Dan here... - Huh? 191 00:12:38,320 --> 00:12:40,879 - That pesky Mr Dan Druff. - Dandruff. 192 00:12:40,880 --> 00:12:44,079 Right. It's my constant problem. Sorry. Sorry. 193 00:12:44,080 --> 00:12:47,599 Hey! We can cut through it. Please don't worry. 194 00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:50,160 And later, I've some products I can recommend. 195 00:12:51,120 --> 00:12:56,079 So do we know which part of the USA Stella is from? 196 00:12:56,080 --> 00:13:00,039 Er, not sure. The... South. 197 00:13:00,040 --> 00:13:02,160 Do we know where, exactly? 198 00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:05,480 Down the South. 199 00:13:06,480 --> 00:13:09,399 Well, she certainly knows how to persuade, all right. 200 00:13:09,400 --> 00:13:11,199 Is that her field? 201 00:13:11,200 --> 00:13:14,279 I think back in the States, yes, lots of that type of thing. 202 00:13:14,280 --> 00:13:17,759 She's rich, I think. Gave a massive donation to help kick us off. 203 00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:20,599 - Really? - She's always travelling the world. 204 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:23,879 Not like me. I haven't really ever left Blossom Vale. 205 00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:25,919 That's part of the haircut, she said, 206 00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:27,560 to have it done for a passport. 207 00:13:29,760 --> 00:13:33,679 I have never seen so much dandruff. And he's like an adoring lapdog. 208 00:13:33,680 --> 00:13:36,039 - Did you see? - He couldn't hide it. 209 00:13:36,040 --> 00:13:38,639 Oh, there's something off-kilter here, like a bob cut 210 00:13:38,640 --> 00:13:41,679 - that isn't truly aligned. - It's the accent. You know, 211 00:13:41,680 --> 00:13:44,079 there's not just one Southern accent. There are many. 212 00:13:44,080 --> 00:13:46,599 I made a thorough study when I did Streetcar Named Desire at A-level. 213 00:13:46,600 --> 00:13:49,199 I bet you did. And Stella? 214 00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:52,159 Inconsistent. And you know how I feel about that. 215 00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:54,839 I do. I certainly do. 216 00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:57,399 Well, maybe she travelled all over t'Southern states. 217 00:13:57,400 --> 00:14:01,359 Mm... Was a bit Gone With The Wind and Dolly Parton pastiche. 218 00:14:01,360 --> 00:14:06,079 Hey, did you notice, when I so much as glanced at her hair 219 00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:08,999 she moved away from me across t'salon? 220 00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:13,039 - I did notice! - There was no touching that construction, was there? 221 00:14:13,040 --> 00:14:14,800 So high! 222 00:14:18,200 --> 00:14:21,240 Oh! That's better! 223 00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:25,919 - - Here y'are, bab, come outta the corner. 224 00:14:25,920 --> 00:14:28,079 Let's have a proper look at ya. 225 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:31,919 I got you some gear from the charity shop. Gratis, of course. 226 00:14:31,920 --> 00:14:33,600 Try this jacket on. 227 00:14:36,240 --> 00:14:40,999 There you go. See? Clothes maketh the man. 228 00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:43,680 Right, where we at? How much we got? 229 00:14:44,640 --> 00:14:48,239 Well, the accounts you said I had to open, I can hardly keep track. 230 00:14:48,240 --> 00:14:50,479 Get it together. 231 00:14:50,480 --> 00:14:54,159 We've got about 2,500 so far already. 232 00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:57,919 That's no good. Not enough, not enough by a long chalk. 233 00:14:57,920 --> 00:15:02,679 - Oh... - Look, it's cos I'm desperate about our future. 234 00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:05,719 I told you. I love you. 235 00:15:05,720 --> 00:15:08,399 We're going to run away together. 236 00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:12,880 - You still love me, don't ya? - Yes! You mean everything. 237 00:15:14,360 --> 00:15:18,959 You see, we need more money. I miscalculated. 238 00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:22,119 When we first met online, you said you owned an 'ouse, 239 00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:24,959 that you were an author. I see now you live in your mum's 240 00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:28,599 old rented cottage and wrote a pamphlet nobody wants. 241 00:15:28,600 --> 00:15:32,879 I know. I'm sorry. I wanted you to want me. 242 00:15:32,880 --> 00:15:36,559 Thank God you told me about the church fund and raising money. 243 00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:38,920 We have our plan now, haven't we, bab? 244 00:15:39,880 --> 00:15:42,519 I'm terrified. 245 00:15:42,520 --> 00:15:46,799 We have to go abroad - and soon, my love. I told you about my ex. 246 00:15:46,800 --> 00:15:49,639 He's in prison right now, but that's not enough for me. 247 00:15:49,640 --> 00:15:52,119 Knowing him, he could appear any time. 248 00:15:52,120 --> 00:15:54,759 Any time. Any time! 249 00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:58,239 He's beyond dangerous. Anything could happen to me. 250 00:15:58,240 --> 00:15:59,600 Don't worry. 251 00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:02,799 Speed is of the essence, though. 252 00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:06,439 As long as I can keep switching between Birmingham... 253 00:16:06,440 --> 00:16:08,599 - - ...and Birmingham, Alabama... 254 00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:10,720 - - ...we'll be all right. 255 00:16:13,720 --> 00:16:15,440 SHE SIGHS 256 00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:20,040 Uncle Stan, battered sausage, buttered barm cake. 257 00:16:22,520 --> 00:16:24,720 Just take a seat, mate. Ta. 258 00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:36,559 Where you going? 259 00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:38,119 I need to find her. 260 00:16:38,120 --> 00:16:40,439 Uncle Stan, you only met her once! 261 00:16:40,440 --> 00:16:42,000 We did not meet. 262 00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:44,760 We were destined. 263 00:17:01,680 --> 00:17:04,359 HORN TOOTS Here we are! 264 00:17:04,360 --> 00:17:05,839 Thank you for the lift. 265 00:17:05,840 --> 00:17:09,599 Well, as you know, I am constantly at your service, dear one, 266 00:17:09,600 --> 00:17:11,839 day... and night. 267 00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:15,559 Why thank you, kind sir. SHE CHUCKLES 268 00:17:15,560 --> 00:17:18,639 Oh! Just admiring that ring. 269 00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:21,720 - May I try it? - Of course you may! 270 00:17:25,240 --> 00:17:27,280 Ah, lovely. 271 00:17:29,360 --> 00:17:31,799 Mercy, I can't remove it. 272 00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:33,439 Oh, never mind. 273 00:17:33,440 --> 00:17:36,599 You can return it at our next rendezvous - which is tonight, 274 00:17:36,600 --> 00:17:38,519 before you even answer. 275 00:17:38,520 --> 00:17:43,360 Just call, and I'll appear in a little puff of magic. 276 00:17:47,840 --> 00:17:52,399 You're listening to your local radio station, Blossom Vale FM. 277 00:17:52,400 --> 00:17:54,599 I don't know why she bothers, she's always way behind our Wincey. 278 00:17:54,600 --> 00:17:57,719 Today's headlines: the escaped convict Richard Matthews 279 00:17:57,720 --> 00:17:59,919 is thought to be hiding or travelling in the area. 280 00:17:59,920 --> 00:18:03,319 - Thank you very much. - Citizens are warned to be vigilant. 281 00:18:03,320 --> 00:18:06,839 Tomorrow, the auction for Save Our Tower begins at 6.30 282 00:18:06,840 --> 00:18:10,839 in St Bartholomew's church hall. A small admission price of £3... 283 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:12,479 So, what you feeling, our Clary? 284 00:18:12,480 --> 00:18:15,359 There's just no mention of Stella anywhere. 285 00:18:15,360 --> 00:18:16,559 Hello! 286 00:18:16,560 --> 00:18:19,759 - Oh, Vicar! - Hi. - Howdy. 287 00:18:19,760 --> 00:18:23,119 - Have any of you seen Stella? - Not since earlier. 288 00:18:23,120 --> 00:18:25,559 I've been waiting at the church for her for over an hour. 289 00:18:25,560 --> 00:18:27,519 I've given up and gone in search. 290 00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:29,919 Hey, Wincey, have you seen Stella? 291 00:18:29,920 --> 00:18:32,879 Oh, she was emptying the charity shop, last I saw of her. 292 00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:34,119 Oh, thank you. 293 00:18:34,120 --> 00:18:36,960 - Nice to see you again, Vicaretta. - Yeah, you too. 294 00:18:38,520 --> 00:18:42,679 You know it's "Vicar" then "Etta"? Her name is not Vicaretta. 295 00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:44,199 Oh! What a relief. 296 00:18:44,200 --> 00:18:46,280 She sounded like an ice cream. 297 00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:54,600 Stan! 298 00:18:55,560 --> 00:18:56,800 Why, thank you. 299 00:18:57,760 --> 00:19:02,319 Suddenly able to look you in the eyes like this. 300 00:19:02,320 --> 00:19:04,679 Why, how kind they are. 301 00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:05,999 Can I help? 302 00:19:06,000 --> 00:19:09,599 Well, I must complete this for my ancestor. 303 00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:12,240 Ancestors is everything to us Vikings. 304 00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:17,919 I need to descend. 305 00:19:17,920 --> 00:19:20,120 Oh! 306 00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:27,719 Er, I have something for you. It's the most precious thing that I own. 307 00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:30,600 - Oh, Stan! - It means everything to me. 308 00:19:31,800 --> 00:19:35,599 - I want you to have it for your auction. - Valuable? 309 00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:40,800 - Priceless. - Oh! - It's the thing that I've built my entire life on. 310 00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:43,280 Oh, I see. 311 00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:47,159 The Ladybird Book Of Vikings. 312 00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:50,599 - Well! - I'm sorry, I've crayoned a few of the beards in, 313 00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:52,879 but I was just a young kid when I first got it. 314 00:19:52,880 --> 00:19:58,359 Stan, to me, philanthropy is the mark of a great man. 315 00:19:58,360 --> 00:20:01,120 It melts my heart every time. 316 00:20:02,440 --> 00:20:07,879 I have my chippy and my nephew and the Viking re-enactment society 317 00:20:07,880 --> 00:20:10,759 of Blossom Vale - and surrounding districts. 318 00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:12,960 But... I am so... 319 00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:15,719 ...so lonely. 320 00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:19,999 Oh, Stan, I know that feeling. 321 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:25,039 - You do? - Yes, we are in the same longboat, you and I. 322 00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:27,039 HE GASPS 323 00:20:27,040 --> 00:20:28,799 HE STRAINS 324 00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:33,799 I pledge my allegiance and service to thee. What does thou need? 325 00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:36,839 Well, at the moment... 326 00:20:36,840 --> 00:20:40,719 ...money - loads of it, if I am to save this tower. 327 00:20:40,720 --> 00:20:44,320 You will have it, I swear before Odin! 328 00:20:48,360 --> 00:20:50,799 Are you... trothed to another? 329 00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:53,520 - Sorry? - The ring. 330 00:20:54,480 --> 00:20:56,680 Oh! That's Race Runard's. 331 00:21:25,440 --> 00:21:28,320 Oh, that one, that would be best there. 332 00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:30,919 Can you just put that one 333 00:21:30,920 --> 00:21:33,719 on the table over there? SHE GIGGLES 334 00:21:33,720 --> 00:21:36,319 Oh, and you, handsome man, 335 00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:38,559 right over there. SHE GIGGLES 336 00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:40,559 - Yes. - Thank you. 337 00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:42,560 PHONE CHIMES 338 00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:51,399 SHE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY 339 00:21:51,400 --> 00:21:53,719 BELL TINKLES 340 00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:55,160 Runard! 341 00:21:57,400 --> 00:21:58,520 Yes? 342 00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:02,559 I have come to fathom your intentions. 343 00:22:02,560 --> 00:22:05,999 - I'm sorry? - Towards the honourable Stella. 344 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:10,399 - What the heck is this? - In my tradition, this calls for a contest, 345 00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:12,559 man against man. 346 00:22:12,560 --> 00:22:15,559 Now, listen, mush, I'm sorry to break it to you, 347 00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:18,079 but you run a backstreet chippy, you're not a Viking. 348 00:22:18,080 --> 00:22:21,079 Man against man. 349 00:22:21,080 --> 00:22:24,159 Oh, what? Ludicrous! 350 00:22:24,160 --> 00:22:27,639 Oh, it's a duel, is it? Ooh! 351 00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:30,719 Oh, well, then, why don't we just fight with these? 352 00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:33,279 You know, they're here already. Might as well use them, eh? 353 00:22:33,280 --> 00:22:36,679 - No need. - Oh! - I have my weapon of choice. 354 00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:40,999 Oh, my God! No. Please, keep calm, dear boy. Mind me artefacts. 355 00:22:41,000 --> 00:22:44,079 I'd keep a tight eye on your artefacts, if I were you. 356 00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:47,039 Look, no. Listen, I am no threat to you at all. 357 00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:50,639 - I'm not interested in her, actually. - You gave her a ring. 358 00:22:50,640 --> 00:22:52,279 Er, yeah. No, just... 359 00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:56,600 ...put your big weapon down and I'll explain. 360 00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:00,919 Thank you. 361 00:23:00,920 --> 00:23:02,679 See, the thing is... 362 00:23:02,680 --> 00:23:05,119 ...the ring is a fake. 363 00:23:05,120 --> 00:23:09,279 It's a worthless trinket. I gave it to her as a test. It's a trap, 364 00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:14,639 cos I am watching to see if she pulls the oldest grift in the book - 365 00:23:14,640 --> 00:23:17,439 pretend the ring will not come off 366 00:23:17,440 --> 00:23:21,399 and then you come back later with it, but swapped with a counterfeit. 367 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:25,559 I'm expecting her back any time soon, you see. It was just a ruse. 368 00:23:25,560 --> 00:23:28,799 I don't want her hand in marriage, 369 00:23:28,800 --> 00:23:32,519 but I would like her to come and work here in my shop. 370 00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:36,159 You don't often find one as polished as she. 371 00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:38,879 You know, she'd be a great saleswoman, 372 00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:42,680 but also, she'd spot a fraudster a mile off. 373 00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:46,159 Oh... 374 00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:48,200 All right. Bye-bye. 375 00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:50,800 BELL TINKLES 376 00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:11,560 APPLAUSE 377 00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:20,119 And here we are! 378 00:24:20,120 --> 00:24:22,599 - Ring-ring! - Thank you so much. 379 00:24:22,600 --> 00:24:24,039 Congratulations. 380 00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:27,559 - Y'all having a good time? - Oh, yes! - Keep on drinking! 381 00:24:27,560 --> 00:24:31,119 - Why, hello, Mr Race Runard. - Oh, my dear lady. 382 00:24:31,120 --> 00:24:34,359 - Stella? I need to talk to you. - Dearest Reverend, not now. 383 00:24:34,360 --> 00:24:35,919 We press forward. 384 00:24:35,920 --> 00:24:37,239 Stan! 385 00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:39,040 APPLAUSE 386 00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:44,719 Blossom Valers, you are doing great! 387 00:24:44,720 --> 00:24:46,999 Let's hear it for yourselves. 388 00:24:47,000 --> 00:24:49,440 CHEERING Lord Mayor! 389 00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:54,519 I want y'all to push that cash-o-meter through the roof! 390 00:24:54,520 --> 00:24:55,839 CHEERING 391 00:24:55,840 --> 00:24:58,599 Fantastic. Now for our next lot. 392 00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:03,119 What am I bid for this pretty little parasol? 393 00:25:03,120 --> 00:25:06,079 Protect yourselves from the sun and the rain 394 00:25:06,080 --> 00:25:09,759 or overattentive admirers. 395 00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:11,799 Can someone start me off with 50? 396 00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:14,159 - £50. - Shirl, did you put vodka in this? 397 00:25:14,160 --> 00:25:17,599 - Do I hear 60? - Two and a half bottles. 398 00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:21,159 WINCEY GASPS So did I! 399 00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:23,640 Sold to that cute little man. 400 00:25:25,760 --> 00:25:30,599 Congratulations. Now, before we move on to our next lot, 401 00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:33,759 remember to keep those cash donations rolling in. 402 00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:35,279 Oh, roll, roll, roll. APPLAUSE 403 00:25:35,280 --> 00:25:37,519 Robin? Where's my little Robin? 404 00:25:37,520 --> 00:25:39,399 Robin is passing among you. 405 00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:42,039 - Yessirree! - The bells! 406 00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:44,879 The Bell's! Like what I put in here. 407 00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:47,239 No! No, the church tower ones. 408 00:25:47,240 --> 00:25:52,319 - Bing-bong. - There we are. - Bing-bong. - Now for our next lot, 409 00:25:52,320 --> 00:25:54,959 a giraffe. 410 00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:57,560 Yes, full size. 411 00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:00,359 Can someone start me off? 412 00:26:00,360 --> 00:26:03,319 - 12 pounds and 10 pence! - Any advance? 413 00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:07,280 No? Sold to the lovely PC Adam! 414 00:26:08,560 --> 00:26:10,799 I must be mental. I bloody donated it! 415 00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:13,279 From the lost property! Would you believe it? 416 00:26:13,280 --> 00:26:16,439 - Where's Kevin tonight? - He's minding the fort. 417 00:26:16,440 --> 00:26:18,159 I had to be here. 418 00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:21,200 A bit of a controversial lot here. 419 00:26:22,600 --> 00:26:24,279 Me! 420 00:26:24,280 --> 00:26:25,960 CHEERING 421 00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:30,480 A cream tea with little old me. 422 00:26:31,480 --> 00:26:33,159 Can I hear 50? 423 00:26:33,160 --> 00:26:35,839 - 50! - Ooh! 60? 424 00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:36,879 70! 425 00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:38,079 80. 426 00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:39,399 £100. 427 00:26:39,400 --> 00:26:42,639 Shush your mush, you little tyke. 150. 428 00:26:42,640 --> 00:26:45,039 - 200! - Steady on, old boy! 429 00:26:45,040 --> 00:26:46,119 300. 430 00:26:46,120 --> 00:26:47,639 350. 431 00:26:47,640 --> 00:26:49,279 400! 432 00:26:49,280 --> 00:26:52,119 - - Ooh! - Sold to that lovely hunk of a man. 433 00:26:52,120 --> 00:26:53,280 APPLAUSE 434 00:26:57,000 --> 00:27:01,039 Congratulations, Stan. And by the way, the ring did come back. 435 00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:05,119 Half-decent copy. And her contacts are quick, I'll give her that. 436 00:27:05,120 --> 00:27:10,160 As to value, as I predicated, could do better out of a lucky bag. 437 00:27:11,960 --> 00:27:15,079 Can you come and give me a hand? I need a little help. 438 00:27:15,080 --> 00:27:19,319 - Just a teeny bit. - Er, yeah... I'll bring... Yeah. 439 00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:26,959 OK. Wow. erm, so, we've been asked to announce lot 25. 440 00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:30,439 What am I bid for this clockwork cake stand that plays 441 00:27:30,440 --> 00:27:33,439 If You Like Pina Coladas And Getting Caught In The Rain? 442 00:27:33,440 --> 00:27:35,479 - Lord Rupert? - £5! 443 00:27:35,480 --> 00:27:39,000 Don't let up on the cash donations, either. Keep them coming in! 444 00:27:40,080 --> 00:27:42,519 - Any... Any more? - £10. 445 00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:44,239 £10. Amazing. £10. 446 00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:47,559 12.50. 12.50. Anything else? Anyone else? 12.50? 447 00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:49,520 - 15! - 15, amazing. Anyone else? 448 00:27:53,480 --> 00:27:54,799 £20! 449 00:27:54,800 --> 00:27:58,840 £20! Amazing. £20. Anyone else? 450 00:28:31,600 --> 00:28:35,119 Pity. Could have had our very own chippy. 451 00:28:35,120 --> 00:28:37,399 I'll settle for a villa in Thailand. 452 00:28:37,400 --> 00:28:40,199 Tonight's the night. Just need to get the payoff. 453 00:28:40,200 --> 00:28:43,399 - How much? - Be around 40 grand, maybe more. 454 00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:45,760 - Did you get that passport for me? - Of course. 455 00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:50,559 The plane's booked. We travel tonight. 456 00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:52,080 SHE CHUCKLES 457 00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:55,600 Going once. Going twice. 458 00:28:56,640 --> 00:28:59,240 Sold! Sold to the lady... APPLAUSE 459 00:29:08,200 --> 00:29:09,760 Stella! 460 00:29:11,200 --> 00:29:13,080 It's been so long. 461 00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:24,679 What about that mug, Robin? Will he give us any trouble? 462 00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:26,480 Leave him to me. 463 00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:34,639 I just want to say thank you so much for coming 464 00:29:34,640 --> 00:29:37,239 and all your bids and donations. 465 00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:40,920 The church tower is going to be saved! Woo! 466 00:29:43,800 --> 00:29:48,239 I love y'all. I love you. Mwah! Mwah! 467 00:29:48,240 --> 00:29:52,479 SHE LAUGHS Hey, that went well! 468 00:29:52,480 --> 00:29:54,919 She really knows how to raise money, does that one. 469 00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:57,079 Oh, she's a dynamo, alrighty. 470 00:29:57,080 --> 00:29:59,639 Oh, good old Stella, saving the church tower. 471 00:29:59,640 --> 00:30:03,359 Does that rhyme? Or has Wincey and Shirl's punch sent me woozy? 472 00:30:03,360 --> 00:30:05,440 - Woozy. - Got you. 473 00:30:07,960 --> 00:30:10,959 Well done, Stella! 474 00:30:10,960 --> 00:30:13,119 There she blows! 475 00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:16,039 Vicar Etta, only been here five minutes and already on the way 476 00:30:16,040 --> 00:30:19,279 to getting her tower saved. She must be pleased. 477 00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:21,879 She didn't really look it. 478 00:30:21,880 --> 00:30:25,399 Stella! I want to talk to you... 479 00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:28,679 - ...if that IS your name. - What are you talking about? 480 00:30:28,680 --> 00:30:33,439 - What are you up to? - Saving your tower, if you hadn't noticed. 481 00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:35,519 - I've rumbled you. - What? 482 00:30:35,520 --> 00:30:38,559 Well, for a start, that £10,000 cheque you gave me 483 00:30:38,560 --> 00:30:41,399 went on a bungee jump, bouncing in and out of the bank. 484 00:30:41,400 --> 00:30:44,079 - I haven't got time for this. - Well, make time. 485 00:30:44,080 --> 00:30:49,359 Also, according to this, the pamphlet that Robin wrote, 486 00:30:49,360 --> 00:30:53,439 Stirling Tobias Norris, your ancestor, 487 00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:55,759 was childless and unmarried. 488 00:30:55,760 --> 00:30:59,479 - - OK, OK. We've both got a few secrets, haven't we? 489 00:30:59,480 --> 00:31:04,279 - I wasn't sure at first, but that grip tells a story. - What? 490 00:31:04,280 --> 00:31:06,639 A little place called Bronzefield nick. 491 00:31:06,640 --> 00:31:11,000 You were young, but you were the big I am, though, weren't you, then? 492 00:31:11,960 --> 00:31:15,119 Coming back now, is it, Reverend? 493 00:31:15,120 --> 00:31:18,359 I want answers, not a diversion. Where's the money? 494 00:31:18,360 --> 00:31:21,039 - What, you after your cut? - You want to watch your mouth. 495 00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:22,599 Yeah, that's more like it. 496 00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:25,279 You're a bigger scammer than I could ever be. 497 00:31:25,280 --> 00:31:27,479 Thought I recognised you. 498 00:31:27,480 --> 00:31:30,599 I was in on a minor fraud charge. You were on a much more serious 499 00:31:30,600 --> 00:31:35,959 wing, a known leader of a notorious girl gang. 500 00:31:35,960 --> 00:31:38,639 Grievous bodily harm, wasn't it? 501 00:31:38,640 --> 00:31:40,599 Robbery, wasn't it? 502 00:31:40,600 --> 00:31:42,999 Drug dealing, wasn't it? 503 00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:45,560 Blimey, I could go on and on. 504 00:31:46,600 --> 00:31:49,559 You'd better watch your back... 505 00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:53,200 ...unless you want your precious parishioners to know the truth. 506 00:32:03,920 --> 00:32:06,279 - I'd better get back. - I'll walk you. 507 00:32:06,280 --> 00:32:10,079 - No! You've two buses to catch. - I know a short cut. 508 00:32:10,080 --> 00:32:15,959 How about a quick visit to Valhalla And Chips, warm the cockles? 509 00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:17,440 Come on, put your arm to bed. 510 00:32:18,360 --> 00:32:21,920 - Shame. - What is? - Me poor old Chopper didn't sell. 511 00:32:23,320 --> 00:32:25,120 Ta-ra, girls! 512 00:32:27,040 --> 00:32:30,120 Where did the vicar get to? She left pretty darn sharpish. 513 00:32:31,640 --> 00:32:33,879 CHURCH BELLS PEAL 514 00:32:33,880 --> 00:32:37,519 What? It's not Sunday. 515 00:32:37,520 --> 00:32:40,240 BELLS RING DISCORDANTLY 516 00:32:43,600 --> 00:32:45,919 Help! 517 00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:50,079 Help me! Help! 518 00:32:50,080 --> 00:32:51,639 Help me! 519 00:32:51,640 --> 00:32:54,240 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 520 00:33:01,440 --> 00:33:04,999 I think I need to take it from here. One of the lads might be able 521 00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:06,319 to give you a lift. 522 00:33:06,320 --> 00:33:08,439 PHONE RINGS Sorry, I need to take this. 523 00:33:08,440 --> 00:33:09,599 Hello? 524 00:33:09,600 --> 00:33:11,080 Yeah. 525 00:33:19,440 --> 00:33:21,560 For what it's worth, I didn't do it. 526 00:33:23,360 --> 00:33:26,639 - What happened? - I suspected a scam. 527 00:33:26,640 --> 00:33:31,160 10,000 was never paid over as promised. I confronted her about it. 528 00:33:32,320 --> 00:33:37,519 - Yes? - Let's just say this isn't the first time I've been in cuffs. 529 00:33:37,520 --> 00:33:41,200 - You can talk to us, Vicar. - Still calling me Vicar? 530 00:33:42,360 --> 00:33:44,800 If only you knew how much that title means to me. 531 00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:50,679 I have a chequered past - 532 00:33:50,680 --> 00:33:53,919 girl gangs, violence, jail. 533 00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:59,240 It's where I found God. I lost my liberty and found my liberation. 534 00:34:00,200 --> 00:34:02,239 But I couldn't tell people that. 535 00:34:02,240 --> 00:34:05,360 I wanted you to get to know me, to trust me. 536 00:34:06,320 --> 00:34:09,000 All I can say is "follow the money". 537 00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:12,639 ADAM SIGHS 538 00:34:12,640 --> 00:34:15,599 The auction money has just been found, hidden in your office. 539 00:34:15,600 --> 00:34:17,639 And Robin's reported that all the charity bank accounts 540 00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:20,919 that were set up through the church have been emptied. 541 00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:22,960 Shall we have a chat down the station? 542 00:34:30,680 --> 00:34:33,959 - Go ahead. - Sighting of Matthews on the edge of town. Details to follow. 543 00:34:33,960 --> 00:34:38,840 Er, there's been a sighting of the prisoner. I've got to go. 544 00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:42,799 - Adam? - Yeah? 545 00:34:42,800 --> 00:34:44,959 Be careful. 546 00:34:44,960 --> 00:34:46,960 Yeah. Will do. 547 00:34:50,040 --> 00:34:52,440 POLICE SIRENS BLARE 548 00:35:03,560 --> 00:35:06,160 - Everything all right, mate? - Yeah, all good. 549 00:35:07,480 --> 00:35:10,080 Car's not looking great. MATTHEWS GRUNTS 550 00:35:14,000 --> 00:35:16,520 Stop! Police! Stop where you are! 551 00:35:18,000 --> 00:35:20,040 Back up! 552 00:35:21,080 --> 00:35:23,280 Stay down! Stay down! 553 00:35:24,240 --> 00:35:25,599 Grab him! 554 00:35:25,600 --> 00:35:27,480 SHOUTING 555 00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:33,080 Get off! I haven't done anything! Get off me! 556 00:35:50,880 --> 00:35:53,799 Think of what Etta said - follow the money. Where is the money? 557 00:35:53,800 --> 00:35:57,079 It's vanished. Save Our Tower page, gone. The lot. 558 00:35:57,080 --> 00:36:00,159 I just can't bear to think of the image of that dead body, 559 00:36:00,160 --> 00:36:02,999 - swaying in the ropes. - Yeah, I see it, too, 560 00:36:03,000 --> 00:36:06,559 and all that flying dust in the stream of the moonlight. 561 00:36:06,560 --> 00:36:09,680 Yes, settled on her velvet suit. 562 00:36:11,480 --> 00:36:14,240 - Yes. - And on the shoulders of it. 563 00:36:15,640 --> 00:36:17,840 Was it dust from the bells above? 564 00:36:18,800 --> 00:36:22,999 Oh, Lily. Oh, I can see it now. Oh, it was... 565 00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:25,639 - Dandruff! - White against the velvet. 566 00:36:25,640 --> 00:36:28,600 And you can't get dandruff from a wig! 567 00:36:29,640 --> 00:36:33,239 The Save Our Tower page, gone. Bank accounts, empty. 568 00:36:33,240 --> 00:36:35,480 - Robin! - Robin. 569 00:36:49,240 --> 00:36:51,880 - Go away! - Please let us in. 570 00:36:55,360 --> 00:36:57,360 Well, that's a bad sign. 571 00:37:05,120 --> 00:37:07,720 HE WAILS 572 00:37:10,240 --> 00:37:12,840 HE SOBS 573 00:37:27,000 --> 00:37:28,960 Thank you. 574 00:37:31,920 --> 00:37:33,640 What happened, Robin? 575 00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:37,240 She did it, that vicar. 576 00:37:39,240 --> 00:37:44,479 You will have to tell us the truth, Robin. Clary, tell him. 577 00:37:44,480 --> 00:37:47,640 Your DNA will be in the dandruff found at the crime scene. 578 00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:54,160 What happened? You can tell us. 579 00:38:01,200 --> 00:38:02,800 I was always a loner. 580 00:38:03,760 --> 00:38:08,880 But since she - Mum - passed, it's been so lonely. 581 00:38:10,720 --> 00:38:16,279 I began to live life online, started looking at online dating. 582 00:38:16,280 --> 00:38:20,279 Suddenly, she came into my life. 583 00:38:20,280 --> 00:38:24,159 - Stella? - Rita, she was called at first. 584 00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:27,159 I could not believe she could be interested in me. 585 00:38:27,160 --> 00:38:33,000 It's like I began to, for the first time, have a life. 586 00:38:34,120 --> 00:38:37,600 - Shall I get you a drink? - Thank you. 587 00:38:40,320 --> 00:38:44,999 It was all a scam. When she found out about the church tower, 588 00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:49,199 she hatched this plan to set it up, then take off with the money. 589 00:38:49,200 --> 00:38:53,519 She will come in the guise of Stella, a Southern belle. 590 00:38:53,520 --> 00:38:56,439 All I have to do is to pretend I don't know her 591 00:38:56,440 --> 00:39:01,160 and follow instructions. I was scared to death but so in love. 592 00:39:03,600 --> 00:39:05,360 Here you go, Robin. 593 00:39:10,360 --> 00:39:11,759 She told me to drain the accounts 594 00:39:11,760 --> 00:39:14,319 and meet her at the bell tower with the cash from the auction. 595 00:39:14,320 --> 00:39:17,519 - Where is it? - Here. - The accounts? - All done. - Good. 596 00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:19,680 The worst was when I went to kiss her. 597 00:39:20,680 --> 00:39:22,599 Get away! God! 598 00:39:22,600 --> 00:39:25,919 - We love each other. - You disgust me. 599 00:39:25,920 --> 00:39:28,080 You... You kissed that man. SHE LAUGHS 600 00:39:29,600 --> 00:39:33,159 Course I kissed him. He's my partner and lover. 601 00:39:33,160 --> 00:39:37,319 Haven't you woken up yet? You think I'd be with you? 602 00:39:37,320 --> 00:39:42,560 I do this all the time. It's my living, taking people like you. 603 00:39:47,640 --> 00:39:49,200 I lost control. 604 00:39:51,120 --> 00:39:52,839 I lost control. 605 00:39:52,840 --> 00:39:59,239 Later, I hid the cash in the vicar's office, knowing it would frame her, 606 00:39:59,240 --> 00:40:04,560 told the police it had gone missing from the hall. So sorry. Sorry. 607 00:40:05,880 --> 00:40:09,440 Robin, we are here to arrest... 608 00:40:10,840 --> 00:40:12,799 Erm... 609 00:40:12,800 --> 00:40:15,320 - You just... - Come on. 610 00:40:23,480 --> 00:40:25,960 So phase one for the work is raised. 611 00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:33,599 Thank you, thank you all. And thank you for accepting me. 612 00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:37,679 I couldn't have asked for a more welcoming and loving parish. 613 00:40:37,680 --> 00:40:39,200 Ahhh! 614 00:40:40,400 --> 00:40:44,519 Let the bells peal out in thanks. Come on, old lads, ring out. 615 00:40:44,520 --> 00:40:46,519 BELLS PEAL 616 00:40:46,520 --> 00:40:48,520 CHEERING 617 00:40:54,720 --> 00:40:59,239 - Well, thank God you're safe. - It's all in the line of duty. 618 00:40:59,240 --> 00:41:02,159 We returned Zag. He kind of gave up any fight when he heard 619 00:41:02,160 --> 00:41:06,319 about Stella, so we won't be seeing him for a very long time. 620 00:41:06,320 --> 00:41:09,199 - Lovely it worked out. - Well, the money was recovered. 621 00:41:09,200 --> 00:41:12,399 - Robin gave us all the help he could. - Well, I'll say it again, 622 00:41:12,400 --> 00:41:14,960 I'm very glad you're safe. I was very worried. 623 00:41:17,480 --> 00:41:18,960 SHE KISSES 624 00:41:22,440 --> 00:41:23,760 Er... 625 00:41:25,000 --> 00:41:27,440 I, er... I was... 626 00:41:30,600 --> 00:41:33,039 What... What are you doing on Saturday? 627 00:41:33,040 --> 00:41:35,159 Saturday's our busiest day. 628 00:41:35,160 --> 00:41:38,079 Oh. Er, right. 629 00:41:38,080 --> 00:41:40,120 But Sunday... 630 00:41:41,080 --> 00:41:43,840 Sunday's not, though. 631 00:41:48,000 --> 00:41:51,160 Uncle Stan? I bought it back for you. 632 00:41:58,960 --> 00:42:01,359 KEV WINCES 633 00:42:01,360 --> 00:42:05,199 - So good of you, Rupert. - Sorry? 634 00:42:05,200 --> 00:42:08,399 To give such a generous donation, matching what was raised. 635 00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:11,320 - I... - You are a good man. 636 00:42:12,280 --> 00:42:13,799 Well, thank you. 637 00:42:13,800 --> 00:42:18,679 It's the agricultural society's annual Rose of the Year award 638 00:42:18,680 --> 00:42:21,519 next month, and I'm submitting Lily Rose, 639 00:42:21,520 --> 00:42:25,240 and I just wondered if perhaps you'd be my guest of honour. 640 00:42:28,120 --> 00:42:30,200 I will look in the appointment book. 641 00:42:32,000 --> 00:42:33,719 Only joking. Course I'll be there. 642 00:42:33,720 --> 00:42:35,279 Well, that's very good. 643 00:42:35,280 --> 00:42:37,559 Well, let's continue with the celebrations. 644 00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:39,159 There's plenty of food and drink. 645 00:42:39,160 --> 00:42:43,279 No fear, my sweet seventies playlist is here. 646 00:42:43,280 --> 00:42:46,479 Love Is In The Air by John Paul Young 647 00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:48,239 Love Is In The Air! 648 00:42:48,240 --> 00:42:49,679 LAUGHTER 649 00:42:49,680 --> 00:42:52,159 ♪ Love is in the air 650 00:42:52,160 --> 00:42:54,560 ♪ Everywhere I look around 651 00:42:57,600 --> 00:42:59,839 ♪ Love is in the air 652 00:42:59,840 --> 00:43:02,440 ♪ Every sight and every sound 653 00:43:04,600 --> 00:43:08,559 ♪ And I don't know if I'm being foolish 654 00:43:08,560 --> 00:43:12,479 ♪ And I don't know if I'm being wise 655 00:43:12,480 --> 00:43:17,039 ♪ But it's something that I must believe in 656 00:43:17,040 --> 00:43:20,480 ♪ And it's there when I look in your eyes... ♪ 657 00:43:21,720 --> 00:43:27,159 Ohhh... 658 00:43:27,160 --> 00:43:28,799 ♪ Love is in the air 659 00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:32,680 ♪ Da-da-da da-da-da-da Love is in the air 660 00:43:34,080 --> 00:43:39,040 ♪ Oh, oh, ohhh Oh, oh, ohhh... ♪ 51517

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