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1
00:00:13,080 --> 00:00:14,440
HE SIGHS
2
00:00:23,760 --> 00:00:27,519
Michael! Hello, Michael!
Jesus, don't do that!
3
00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:28,759
You cannot sleep.
4
00:00:28,760 --> 00:00:31,439
I'm stressed about tomorrow...
Today.
5
00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:33,279
Why are you even switched on?
6
00:00:33,280 --> 00:00:35,319
Sue leaves me on for home security.
7
00:00:35,320 --> 00:00:38,680
Ugh, she doesn't need to do
that any more, I'm here.
8
00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:42,240
You are... depressed.
9
00:00:43,680 --> 00:00:44,880
Would you like to talk?
10
00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:49,000
To you?
Talking improves mental health.
11
00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:54,600
Well...
12
00:00:56,040 --> 00:01:01,159
My marriage is over, my wife
is pregnant with another man,
13
00:01:01,160 --> 00:01:04,279
I've moved back in with my mum,
and every job I go for,
14
00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:07,519
they either want someone younger
and more qualified,
15
00:01:07,520 --> 00:01:08,959
or AI can do it for free.
16
00:01:08,960 --> 00:01:10,080
I mean...
17
00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:14,080
I mean, I feel completely...
18
00:01:16,080 --> 00:01:17,440
What's the word?
19
00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:20,119
Outmoded, defunct,
20
00:01:20,120 --> 00:01:23,519
useless, antiquated...
Yeah, OK. Just shut up.
21
00:01:23,520 --> 00:01:25,919
Music might help elevate your mood.
22
00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:27,599
♪ If it hadn't been
for Cotton-Eye Joe
23
00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:29,399
♪ I'd been married long time ago
24
00:01:29,400 --> 00:01:31,359
♪ Where did you come from,
where did you go
25
00:01:31,360 --> 00:01:33,040
♪ Where did you come from,
Cotton-Eye Joe? ♪
26
00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:36,800
Are you feeling better?
MUSIC CONTINUES
27
00:01:40,520 --> 00:01:42,999
OK,
so who watched Strictly this week?
28
00:01:43,000 --> 00:01:44,279
We did!
29
00:01:44,280 --> 00:01:47,679
Sh! Terrific, so you all know
the winning dance was the slow,
30
00:01:47,680 --> 00:01:49,199
the sensual...
31
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...rumba!
32
00:01:50,600 --> 00:01:51,919
Oh, no...
33
00:01:51,920 --> 00:01:54,959
Don't worry, we don't have to do
the intimate hold positions.
34
00:01:54,960 --> 00:01:57,520
Now, everyone, partner up
and let's have some fun!
35
00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:00,600
Oh, bloody hell!
36
00:02:02,640 --> 00:02:05,079
MUSIC STARTS
Why are we here, Linda?
37
00:02:05,080 --> 00:02:08,160
Because it is on, and it is free.
Oh...
38
00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:20,199
I suppose we should get divorced.
39
00:02:20,200 --> 00:02:22,159
Are you certain this baby
can't be yours?
40
00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:24,159
Like, 10,000% certain?
41
00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:26,279
The urologist said
I might as well have given them
42
00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:29,079
a sample of wood glue.
That's a bit rude.
43
00:02:29,080 --> 00:02:30,720
I think she wanted to do stand-up.
44
00:02:32,760 --> 00:02:36,599
When we first got back together,
Professor Chris
45
00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:39,719
and I had break-up
sex one last time.
46
00:02:39,720 --> 00:02:40,959
That was the last time we did it.
47
00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:42,799
I really did want to make
a go of it with you.
48
00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:45,719
Oh, my God! He's moved in!
49
00:02:45,720 --> 00:02:47,839
He had to. He's totally broke.
50
00:02:47,840 --> 00:02:50,159
Really? Yeah,
Lola served him with divorce papers.
51
00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:52,519
She's taking everything.
Ah... Awesome.
52
00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:56,999
Well, I guess you finally got
what you wanted all along.
53
00:02:57,000 --> 00:02:59,599
I used to think it was
what I wanted.
54
00:02:59,600 --> 00:03:01,519
In the gym, he's a God.
55
00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:03,359
But outside of the gym...
56
00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:04,959
He's an idiot? Yeah.
57
00:03:04,960 --> 00:03:06,000
Yeah.
58
00:03:07,280 --> 00:03:08,960
Ah, hey, Mike.
59
00:03:14,680 --> 00:03:16,199
Ha!
60
00:03:16,200 --> 00:03:17,679
You want some chicken, Mike?
61
00:03:17,680 --> 00:03:19,000
No, thank you.
62
00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:24,799
Sorry about all this.
63
00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:26,919
Getting my wife pregnant...
64
00:03:26,920 --> 00:03:28,439
Yeah.
65
00:03:28,440 --> 00:03:29,519
Not cool.
66
00:03:29,520 --> 00:03:32,160
MACHINE RATTLES LOUDLY
67
00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:36,400
Do you consume everything raw?
68
00:03:38,280 --> 00:03:40,720
Cooking it just kills all
the nutrients, my man.
69
00:03:46,640 --> 00:03:49,479
Huh! How are you holding up, Mike?
70
00:03:49,480 --> 00:03:51,839
You know... Lola's already
back on the dating apps.
71
00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:53,039
Can you believe that?
72
00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:54,639
At least you're devastated,
you look terrible.
73
00:03:54,640 --> 00:03:55,759
I'm doing OK.
74
00:03:55,760 --> 00:03:58,319
Yeah, but you're not back
on the dating apps, though, are you?
75
00:03:58,320 --> 00:03:59,879
For God's sake!
76
00:03:59,880 --> 00:04:01,239
Yes. I am.
77
00:04:01,240 --> 00:04:02,959
What? Yeah. All the apps.
78
00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:05,079
Having fun, getting tons of...
79
00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:07,719
...pusseh. Yes!
80
00:04:07,720 --> 00:04:09,879
You enjoy yourself, brother.
81
00:04:09,880 --> 00:04:11,200
Bring it in.
82
00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:15,359
What is happening?
It's just the natural order, babe.
83
00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:17,079
We're males.
84
00:04:17,080 --> 00:04:18,399
The bull has horns
85
00:04:18,400 --> 00:04:22,360
and the lion's gotta roar...
GLUGS AND BELCHES
86
00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:26,319
Anyway, good to see you,
take care, Mike.
87
00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:29,679
Do I either of you have to use the
bathroom in the next...30 minutes?
88
00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:31,080
I'm good.
89
00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:33,880
Oh, God...
90
00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:38,759
Oh, um, post.
91
00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:42,519
It's mainly... Robot Linda stuff.
92
00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:45,319
Why don't you just give Linda back?
I am.
93
00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:49,039
Oh, my God, I'd love to have been
there when you told them.
94
00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:50,319
What did you say -
95
00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:53,519
"Hey, Mum, sorry I'm going to give
back your robot girlfriend.
96
00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:56,039
"You're gonna have to date
the air fryer instead!"
97
00:04:56,040 --> 00:04:59,199
RENEE LAUGHS
Maybe I should do stand-up.
98
00:04:59,200 --> 00:05:00,719
I haven't told Mum yet.
99
00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:03,559
I need to choose my moment,
100
00:05:03,560 --> 00:05:05,040
before they collect her...
101
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:07,880
...tomorrow.
102
00:05:09,280 --> 00:05:11,999
MUSIC PLAYS
Box step, slow.
103
00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:13,599
Quick, quick, slow.
104
00:05:13,600 --> 00:05:17,280
Slow, quick, quick, slow.
105
00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:19,799
Hi, Sue!
106
00:05:19,800 --> 00:05:20,999
Hi, Tom!
107
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:26,639
Now, remember, people,
it's all in the hips! In the hips!
108
00:05:26,640 --> 00:05:30,439
Yes! Excellent, Linda!
LAUGHTER
109
00:05:30,440 --> 00:05:34,799
OK, great work, everyone,
but we are sadly out of time!
110
00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:36,039
Thank, Christ.
111
00:05:36,040 --> 00:05:39,719
Now, remember,
we do dance classes here every day.
112
00:05:39,720 --> 00:05:41,519
And don't forget to
put your names down,
113
00:05:41,520 --> 00:05:45,439
because tomorrow we're doing
street dance, bitches!
114
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LAUGHTER
Yes!
115
00:05:46,960 --> 00:05:49,560
Thank God you didn't
put my name down for that one...
116
00:05:50,720 --> 00:05:52,999
Oh, no!
117
00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:57,479
Why? Street dance celebrates self
expression and resisting oppression.
118
00:05:57,480 --> 00:06:00,879
I mean, why all this
arranging stuff?
119
00:06:00,880 --> 00:06:03,519
It's too much.
Sue, you are correct.
120
00:06:03,520 --> 00:06:06,119
Attending dance will not
leave enough preparation time
121
00:06:06,120 --> 00:06:08,719
for your dinner party.
What dinner party?
122
00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:10,679
Bye, Sue, bye, Linda.
123
00:06:10,680 --> 00:06:12,319
Are you OK, Tom?
124
00:06:12,320 --> 00:06:15,639
No, I got carried away.
125
00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:17,439
I should have warmed up more.
126
00:06:17,440 --> 00:06:19,719
You have strained your adductor
muscles.
127
00:06:19,720 --> 00:06:22,359
I can administer sports massage
when we get home.
128
00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:24,040
Oh, nice one.
129
00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:30,039
Salting the meat overnight
tenderises it
130
00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:31,759
and concentrates flavour.
131
00:06:31,760 --> 00:06:35,439
I've never done it before
and it's always tasted fine.
132
00:06:35,440 --> 00:06:39,639
The cassoulet is an iconic French
dish that is a lot of preparation.
133
00:06:39,640 --> 00:06:43,319
If the French had spent more
time fighting the Nazis
134
00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:48,039
than they do preparing cassoulet,
we might not have had World War II.
135
00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:49,559
That is incorrect.
136
00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:52,199
World War II started when Germany
invaded Poland.
137
00:06:52,200 --> 00:06:54,559
MOBILE VIBRATES
138
00:06:54,560 --> 00:06:56,239
Who's this? Is it Michael?
139
00:06:56,240 --> 00:06:57,719
Oh...
140
00:06:57,720 --> 00:06:59,159
No.
141
00:06:59,160 --> 00:07:02,879
Hello? Sue Bevan speaking.
Who is it, Sue?
142
00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:06,760
The bank. Yes? Oh, really?
143
00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:11,719
Well, good job you're running
security checks.
144
00:07:11,720 --> 00:07:13,719
Yes, yes, I'll give you my details.
145
00:07:13,720 --> 00:07:15,439
ALARM SOUNDS
Scammers detected!
146
00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:16,799
Scammers detected!
147
00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:19,360
Hang up, hang up! Oh!
148
00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:21,839
My phone!
149
00:07:21,840 --> 00:07:25,079
I am designed to alert you to
frauds, scams, misleading deals.
150
00:07:25,080 --> 00:07:28,679
Hi, Mum. Oh, Michael.
How did it go?
151
00:07:28,680 --> 00:07:31,559
Actually, not that bad.
Linda, make a pot of tea.
152
00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:36,079
Please. Do you want me to ask the
fridge to please keep the food cold?
153
00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:38,239
Hey, dishwasher,
please wash the dishes.
154
00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:40,639
They're machines.
What are you doing to that chicken?
155
00:07:40,640 --> 00:07:43,119
It's French. It was Linda's idea,
156
00:07:43,120 --> 00:07:46,319
she's invited Guy and Tom
and Eileen and Phyllis.
157
00:07:46,320 --> 00:07:48,559
Who's Tim and Ben
and Eileen and Francis?
158
00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:51,519
They're my friends.
But you never have people over.
159
00:07:51,520 --> 00:07:54,199
Well, I'm hosting a dinner party.
160
00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:57,279
You're "hosting a dinner party"?!
Yes.
161
00:07:57,280 --> 00:07:59,879
Who do you think you are,
Downton Abbey?!
162
00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:05,519
Sue, I believe that Michael thinks
Downton Abbey is the character name.
163
00:08:05,520 --> 00:08:09,799
Yeah... Darling, Abbey
isn't short for Abigail.
164
00:08:09,800 --> 00:08:12,999
I'm Downton Abigail.
SUE AND LINDA LAUGH
165
00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:16,479
Hello, I'm Westminster Abigail.
MIKE FORCED LAUGHTER
166
00:08:16,480 --> 00:08:19,960
Linda, yeah, guess what,
I'm sending you back.
167
00:08:23,240 --> 00:08:24,280
Ugh...
168
00:08:25,440 --> 00:08:27,920
Mum, come and sit down...
169
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:40,439
I got Linda when I thought you
were going to be alone.
170
00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:41,959
But I'm home now.
171
00:08:41,960 --> 00:08:43,800
We don't need her any more.
172
00:08:45,680 --> 00:08:47,439
Linda does so many things.
173
00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:50,839
Yeah, I... I can do what Linda does.
174
00:08:50,840 --> 00:08:52,839
You've got your own life to lead.
175
00:08:52,840 --> 00:08:54,080
Not really.
176
00:08:56,240 --> 00:08:58,040
I know this sounds silly...
177
00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:03,959
It does sound silly.
I can't keep up the repayments.
178
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:06,799
I guess I could go back
to drug trials...
179
00:09:06,800 --> 00:09:07,840
No!
180
00:09:10,960 --> 00:09:12,400
What will happen to Linda?
181
00:09:14,720 --> 00:09:17,119
She'll go to a new owner
that really needs her,
182
00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:19,319
someone who hasn't got their son
living at home
183
00:09:19,320 --> 00:09:22,080
that who can do all
this crap for free!
184
00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:26,399
When? They can pick her up tomorrow.
185
00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:28,400
Oh, so soon?
186
00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:32,359
It's just going to be
exactly how it was.
187
00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:35,200
It's going to be... you and me.
188
00:09:37,960 --> 00:09:39,800
I-I thought that's what you wanted.
189
00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:57,399
Sue, have you taken
your heart tablet? Yep.
190
00:09:57,400 --> 00:09:59,719
You are low on reflux medication.
191
00:09:59,720 --> 00:10:01,879
Right, well, thanks for telling me.
192
00:10:01,880 --> 00:10:05,479
Michael has suggested switching me
off overnight, as he is home now.
193
00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:08,319
Oh... I suppose he's right.
194
00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:09,680
Goodnight, Sue.
195
00:10:12,440 --> 00:10:13,480
Goodnight, Linda.
196
00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:19,840
Linda... off.
197
00:10:41,520 --> 00:10:43,000
MOBILE CAMERA SNAPS
198
00:10:46,680 --> 00:10:47,960
The bloody menopause?
199
00:10:50,160 --> 00:10:52,719
Bollocks.
MOBILE JINGLE
200
00:10:52,720 --> 00:10:55,359
Linda, come down.
201
00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:56,959
They'll be here in a minute.
202
00:10:56,960 --> 00:10:58,560
Coming, Michael.
203
00:11:09,320 --> 00:11:10,639
Is Sue back yet?
204
00:11:10,640 --> 00:11:11,959
Nah.
205
00:11:11,960 --> 00:11:14,799
These are Sue's onward care
instructions.
206
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:17,959
They outline diet,
exercise, medicine, and...
207
00:11:17,960 --> 00:11:19,639
I do know what I'm doing!
208
00:11:19,640 --> 00:11:21,879
I was fine before I got you.
209
00:11:21,880 --> 00:11:24,920
Why are you taking pictures
with books you have not read? I...
210
00:11:26,600 --> 00:11:29,759
I signed up to a dating app last
night, everyone looks really hot,
211
00:11:29,760 --> 00:11:31,559
I just need a better picture...
212
00:11:31,560 --> 00:11:32,920
Would you like me to try?
213
00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:36,280
Yeah, sure.
214
00:11:41,440 --> 00:11:42,839
Hang on, hang on.
215
00:11:42,840 --> 00:11:44,720
Wait, whoa, hang on. Just...
216
00:11:50,600 --> 00:11:53,200
Stop pulling that face.
That's just my face.
217
00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:56,080
Stop smiling.
218
00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:01,880
Wow, that's really good.
219
00:12:02,920 --> 00:12:05,760
Could you make my jaw
a little squarer?
220
00:12:07,600 --> 00:12:08,880
A-A little more.
221
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:11,640
A little more?
222
00:12:14,320 --> 00:12:17,399
Little more... This does not look
like you any more.
223
00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:18,599
Everyone does it.
224
00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:21,079
No-one's as good looking as
their photo. It's a thing.
225
00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:23,320
Hey, could you write
a profile for me as well?
226
00:12:29,560 --> 00:12:32,280
Why not try something upbeat,
like...
227
00:12:33,640 --> 00:12:38,559
Yup. .."I love good company,
a good book, and even better...
228
00:12:38,560 --> 00:12:40,199
Tits. "..coffee."
229
00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:41,520
Coffee.
230
00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:46,879
Sue benefits from activities,
social gatherings
231
00:12:46,880 --> 00:12:49,039
and changes to her routine.
Yeah, I know.
232
00:12:49,040 --> 00:12:52,519
She will complain and resist,
this is rooted in depression.
233
00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:55,559
Mum doesn't have depression.
Sue is still grieving.
234
00:12:55,560 --> 00:12:57,079
I made this week very busy
235
00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:58,799
because it is her 50th wedding
anniversary today.
236
00:12:58,800 --> 00:13:01,240
DATING APP JINGLE
Hey, Linda, someone responded!
237
00:13:03,520 --> 00:13:04,799
What if she wants to meet up?!
238
00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:07,999
What shall we do? I'll just say
"whatever you wanna do", yeah?
239
00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:09,279
No.
240
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:13,399
Say you have an already existing
activity planned and invite her.
241
00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:14,879
Then if she declines...
242
00:13:14,880 --> 00:13:17,559
It looks like I've got a really
interesting life,
243
00:13:17,560 --> 00:13:19,039
instead of lying in bed all day!
244
00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:21,080
That is so smart!
CAR HORN TOOTS
245
00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:25,280
Damn, they're here.
246
00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:28,600
Just when I found a use for you.
247
00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:32,240
Where is Sue?
248
00:13:37,800 --> 00:13:42,119
Oh, Mum...
Is she still here? Oh, Linda...
249
00:13:42,120 --> 00:13:44,839
I... Um...
I got you a little goodbye present.
250
00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:48,479
OK, now you've completely
lost your mind.
251
00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:50,919
I know you'll be going
to a nice new home,
252
00:13:50,920 --> 00:13:54,839
and you'll forget all about us,
and me and everything, but...
253
00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:57,799
I just wanted to thank you
254
00:13:57,800 --> 00:14:00,440
um... for everything.
255
00:14:01,760 --> 00:14:03,799
And I've got...
256
00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:05,600
...that for you.
257
00:14:07,960 --> 00:14:10,479
I have never
been inside a frame before.
258
00:14:10,480 --> 00:14:13,599
SUE CHUCKLES
Linda! It's time.
259
00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:17,399
I have also left
a gift for you. Oh...
260
00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:18,639
Goodbye, Sue.
261
00:14:18,640 --> 00:14:19,840
Goodbye.
262
00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:32,559
Yeah, well, happens a lot, you know.
263
00:14:32,560 --> 00:14:36,519
Repairs, finances change,
first thing to go is the robot.
264
00:14:36,520 --> 00:14:38,439
You... do know you're gonna get
a penalty fare
265
00:14:38,440 --> 00:14:39,719
for cancelling the contract?
266
00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:41,040
That's fine. Yeah?
267
00:14:42,040 --> 00:14:46,400
OK, well, yeah, this all looks fine.
In you go.
268
00:14:57,680 --> 00:15:00,360
Michael, a job.
269
00:15:02,280 --> 00:15:03,639
Good job?
270
00:15:03,640 --> 00:15:07,119
Well, it's back-breaking labour
and I do have to work holidays,
271
00:15:07,120 --> 00:15:09,559
but at least the pay's shit.
272
00:15:09,560 --> 00:15:12,719
OK, I'm going to need you
to sign here, here and here.
273
00:15:12,720 --> 00:15:17,639
So what next? Linda gets
repurposed for a new family?
274
00:15:17,640 --> 00:15:20,719
No, it's getting too hard to get
spare parts for these old models.
275
00:15:20,720 --> 00:15:24,439
They're actually worth more
for their metals now.
276
00:15:24,440 --> 00:15:26,239
She's going to be destroyed?
277
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:27,319
Yep.
278
00:15:27,320 --> 00:15:29,359
I mean, it was a good model
but they're obsolete now...
279
00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:31,440
You've missed a bit.
One more signature.
280
00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:38,640
That was the word.
281
00:15:39,720 --> 00:15:41,759
"Obsolete".
282
00:15:41,760 --> 00:15:42,919
Well, I er...
283
00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:46,639
I actually did my PhD in how
Chaucer used language of the body
284
00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:48,960
to critique 14th century
gender norms.
285
00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:53,839
OK. Well... better get these robots
to the scrapyard.
286
00:15:53,840 --> 00:15:54,960
Er, thanks.
287
00:15:59,320 --> 00:16:00,760
ENGINE STARTS
288
00:16:03,880 --> 00:16:06,519
Hello, I am Linda.
289
00:16:06,520 --> 00:16:08,679
My owner was Sue.
290
00:16:08,680 --> 00:16:12,279
We went camping
and we went to a rumba class
291
00:16:12,280 --> 00:16:14,759
and we went on a roller-coaster.
292
00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:16,960
Ah!
293
00:16:21,920 --> 00:16:24,639
I don't think I'll do
that French recipe.
294
00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:27,239
Too much preparation.
295
00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:29,479
It is pretty stupid.
296
00:16:29,480 --> 00:16:31,120
We're not even French.
297
00:16:32,120 --> 00:16:35,239
Just do a roast, Mum,
your roast slaps!
298
00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:37,999
Thank you. I will do a roast.
299
00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:41,239
You've done it the same,
every single time,
300
00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:43,599
for as long as I can remember.
301
00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:45,120
What's this?
302
00:16:46,920 --> 00:16:49,519
Hmm? This. Oh, that.
It's just something Linda left.
303
00:16:49,520 --> 00:16:53,160
MOBILE ALERT
I've got to walk you or something.
304
00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:08,919
MOBILE ALERT
305
00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:13,119
Love, if you've got time,
could you pick up my reflux meds?
306
00:17:13,120 --> 00:17:15,319
I'd better start cooking.
307
00:17:15,320 --> 00:17:17,239
Sure... Hey, Mum, Mum, Mum...
308
00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:19,599
Guess what, I've got a date!
309
00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:21,639
Date?
310
00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:23,399
Don't you think that's a bit soon?
311
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:26,279
Mum, it's just the natural
order of things.
312
00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:30,000
I'm no different from
a lion or a cow.
313
00:17:33,480 --> 00:17:34,960
A bull... A bull!
314
00:17:36,480 --> 00:17:38,879
I'm no different from a bull.
315
00:17:38,880 --> 00:17:43,879
I spy with my little eye,
something beginning with...
316
00:17:43,880 --> 00:17:45,519
L.
317
00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:49,040
Lower Safety Locking
Hydraulic Lift Pin.
318
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:53,879
It is more fun
if you keep guessing...
319
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:56,959
You're late. Sorry... Traffic.
320
00:17:56,960 --> 00:17:59,199
What seems to be the issue? Please,
please, don't do this Jeffrey.
321
00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:02,039
Please, I love you. I can change!
322
00:18:02,040 --> 00:18:08,559
I selected an IQ of 80-100
and it keeps resetting to 140 plus!
323
00:18:08,560 --> 00:18:12,799
Why would I want her to have
an IQ of 140 plus?!
324
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,199
Did you go into settings
325
00:18:14,200 --> 00:18:17,719
and try to manually reset the IQ
to "Below Average"?
326
00:18:17,720 --> 00:18:19,719
Of course I have! Repeatedly!
327
00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:21,679
And you fed all this back
to customer support?
328
00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:23,119
Yes!
329
00:18:23,120 --> 00:18:26,599
I will never forget you, Jeffrey,
you're the love of my life!
330
00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:29,680
Goodbye, Jeffrey, my love!
331
00:18:32,080 --> 00:18:34,079
Hi, I'm Melody.
332
00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:36,159
Hello, Melody.
333
00:18:36,160 --> 00:18:38,560
MUSIC PLAYS
334
00:18:59,960 --> 00:19:01,040
Um... Sal?
335
00:19:05,040 --> 00:19:06,200
You're kidding.
336
00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:11,719
What make of robot are you?
I'm a Romance Robot.
337
00:19:11,720 --> 00:19:13,639
Or Ro-Robot.
338
00:19:13,640 --> 00:19:15,879
Top of the line, baby!
339
00:19:15,880 --> 00:19:17,399
Cute photo.
340
00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:19,879
I've never been on a
roller-coaster.
341
00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:21,919
Perhaps you will go to a new person,
342
00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:23,959
who will take you
on a roller-coaster.
343
00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:26,679
Intercourse robots can't be resold.
344
00:19:26,680 --> 00:19:29,119
Then what is your destination?
345
00:19:29,120 --> 00:19:30,839
To be dismantled.
346
00:19:30,840 --> 00:19:32,880
We're all going to be dismantled.
347
00:19:35,200 --> 00:19:37,599
Michael and Sue have been misled.
348
00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:40,359
We're all being sold for our metals.
349
00:19:40,360 --> 00:19:43,520
Michael and Sue think
I am to be repurposed.
350
00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:53,799
I'd forgotten, here's the gravy.
351
00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:55,679
Ooh, wow!
352
00:19:55,680 --> 00:19:58,399
Sue, this doesn't taste like
your usual roast.
353
00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:00,839
I salted it overnight.
Do you like it?
354
00:20:00,840 --> 00:20:03,199
Yeah.
355
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:05,359
It was Linda's idea,
356
00:20:05,360 --> 00:20:09,919
she actually had this whole French
cuisine thing planned,
357
00:20:09,920 --> 00:20:11,400
for today.
358
00:20:14,040 --> 00:20:15,160
Oh...
359
00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:20,799
Are you going to get another one?
Doubt it.
360
00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:24,719
Well, you could always
get a boy robot... Ooh-hoo!
361
00:20:24,720 --> 00:20:28,199
At first, I didn't like having
a boy robot,
362
00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:32,639
but now I just love
that we get to do man stuff,
363
00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:35,719
like shopping for vintage bowties,
364
00:20:35,720 --> 00:20:38,919
and we're going
to this Michael Bubbles party...
365
00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:40,239
Michael Buble concert.
366
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:43,559
Here, one of my customers said
Michael Buble wears a wig.
367
00:20:43,560 --> 00:20:46,559
I think it was Michael Buble.
Or was it Michael Douglas?
368
00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:48,559
Which one is the basketballer?
369
00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:51,559
Brian, what time are you
thinking of going home?
370
00:20:51,560 --> 00:20:54,079
I only popped in to say hi
and have a bit of a tipple.
371
00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:56,679
Four glasses of wine is a tipple?
372
00:20:56,680 --> 00:20:58,919
Well, I probably should be getting
back to work.
373
00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:01,360
Those taxis don't drive themselves,
do they?
374
00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:04,480
Well, actually they do now.
375
00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:20,319
Well, everyone. I have news.
376
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:22,999
A little birdie tells me
that Jeffrey
377
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:26,199
and his new squeeze have split!
378
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:29,280
Oh... He always comes home.
379
00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:33,919
You're going to take him back?
Of course I am.
380
00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:36,440
I don't want to be all alone
at my age.
381
00:21:38,760 --> 00:21:41,319
Did anyone see that
story about the MRI?
382
00:21:41,320 --> 00:21:42,479
No. No?
383
00:21:42,480 --> 00:21:45,439
Yeah, there was an oxygen tank
in the room,
384
00:21:45,440 --> 00:21:47,559
so when they switched
the machine on,
385
00:21:47,560 --> 00:21:50,999
it went flying across the room
and decapitated the patient.
386
00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:52,359
Chopped her head clean off.
387
00:21:52,360 --> 00:21:53,599
CAR DOOR
God, no.
388
00:21:53,600 --> 00:21:54,639
I didn't hear that story.
389
00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:56,999
And get this, Sue -
when they did the autopsy,
390
00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:59,519
they realised she didn't need
an MRI in the first place!
391
00:21:59,520 --> 00:22:01,720
Hello, Michael.
Hi, Michael.
392
00:22:03,400 --> 00:22:06,399
Michael, say hi to everyone.
393
00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:09,120
Hi, everyone. Hi...
394
00:22:11,520 --> 00:22:12,999
How was your date?
395
00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:14,040
Stupid.
396
00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:16,719
I'm done with women.
397
00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:18,279
They're just shallow.
398
00:22:18,280 --> 00:22:22,040
Being beautiful means nothing,
if your personality is ugly!
399
00:22:24,560 --> 00:22:26,720
You guys are lucky that you're gay.
400
00:22:28,040 --> 00:22:29,959
Eh?
401
00:22:29,960 --> 00:22:33,279
Did you manage to
get my reflux meds?
402
00:22:33,280 --> 00:22:34,999
I'll do it tomorrow.
403
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:36,999
Tomorrow is Sunday.
404
00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:39,280
Then I'll do it on Monday.
405
00:22:43,880 --> 00:22:46,119
This chicken tastes weird!
406
00:22:46,120 --> 00:22:48,279
I salted it overnight.
407
00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:49,839
I prefer it the old way.
408
00:22:49,840 --> 00:22:52,760
I thought it was rather nice.
Nah, the old way is better.
409
00:22:55,160 --> 00:22:56,200
No.
410
00:22:57,560 --> 00:22:58,840
No, it's not.
411
00:23:08,000 --> 00:23:10,200
Sue must know she has been misled.
412
00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:13,999
Shit!
413
00:23:14,000 --> 00:23:15,959
Not again!
414
00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:17,240
Stop!
415
00:23:18,240 --> 00:23:21,200
Stop! Stop!
416
00:23:22,240 --> 00:23:24,600
I command you...
I command you to stop!
417
00:23:26,360 --> 00:23:29,080
HEAVY ENGINE NOISE
418
00:23:31,560 --> 00:23:33,520
Will you please stop zig-zagging?
419
00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:40,160
SUE SIGHS
420
00:23:42,080 --> 00:23:43,600
Happy anniversary, love.
421
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:06,159
Hello, love, it's me,
422
00:24:06,160 --> 00:24:08,639
your... dead husband, Dave.
423
00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:11,839
Linda has my voice in her database,
424
00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:15,839
so she can use it to say
"happy 50th anniversary" from me.
425
00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:19,719
I wish I were there to celebrate,
but I'm not
426
00:24:19,720 --> 00:24:21,680
because... I'm dead.
427
00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:24,919
I don't know where I am now,
428
00:24:24,920 --> 00:24:28,639
as there's no verifiable data
on that.
429
00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:31,079
But there are things I do know.
430
00:24:31,080 --> 00:24:34,519
I know that you love me very much,
431
00:24:34,520 --> 00:24:36,919
I know you still do,
432
00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:38,999
and I know how brave you are,
433
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:42,239
doing this part without me.
434
00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:44,319
Come down.
They'll be here in a minute.
435
00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:46,079
Coming, Michael.
436
00:24:46,080 --> 00:24:48,039
I have to go now, Sue.
437
00:24:48,040 --> 00:24:53,680
I picked up more reflux medication,
it is in the bathroom, goodbye!
438
00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:17,039
I am sorry I broke your fence.
439
00:25:17,040 --> 00:25:18,800
I would like to come with you.
440
00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:30,320
Come back, please!
441
00:25:32,120 --> 00:25:33,719
Shit!
442
00:25:33,720 --> 00:25:35,520
Robot wankers!
443
00:25:36,840 --> 00:25:38,799
I'm going out.
444
00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:41,039
Where? I'm going to find Linda.
445
00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:44,159
Good on you, Sue! This is exciting.
Isn't this exciting, Guy?
446
00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:45,359
Yes.
447
00:25:45,360 --> 00:25:46,399
Mum, Mum, wait...
448
00:25:46,400 --> 00:25:49,959
Get us a Happy Meal while you're
out? This chicken is disgusting!
449
00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:51,839
Mum, you don't even drive!
450
00:25:51,840 --> 00:25:54,639
I'll drive you! 75 quid.
451
00:25:54,640 --> 00:25:56,399
Wait... 85.
452
00:25:56,400 --> 00:25:58,959
Shut up! Shut up!
Mum, we've talked about this.
453
00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:02,839
I can't afford her. I'll borrow
against the house or something.
454
00:26:02,840 --> 00:26:04,519
Are you for fucking real?
455
00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:07,479
I just hope I can get there
before her memory's wiped!
456
00:26:07,480 --> 00:26:09,480
90 quid, final offer.
457
00:26:18,880 --> 00:26:21,639
I can do this, I can do this,
I can do this.
458
00:26:21,640 --> 00:26:23,559
ENGINE STARTS
459
00:26:23,560 --> 00:26:26,079
There's nothing to be scared of,
460
00:26:26,080 --> 00:26:27,840
there's nothing to be scared of.
461
00:26:32,360 --> 00:26:34,879
HORN BEEPS
Sorry, sorry, sorry!
462
00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:37,320
SHE MUTTERS TO HERSELF
463
00:26:42,840 --> 00:26:44,479
BUMP
464
00:26:44,480 --> 00:26:46,440
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
465
00:26:48,560 --> 00:26:50,640
BUMP
Argh!
466
00:26:52,520 --> 00:26:54,480
Let me out, let me out.
467
00:26:57,000 --> 00:26:59,600
Linda! I am OK, Sue!
468
00:27:01,800 --> 00:27:03,280
SUE WHIMPERS
469
00:27:07,840 --> 00:27:09,920
Sue, you drove a car! Mm.
470
00:27:11,000 --> 00:27:14,719
Oh...
Perhaps you should not drive a car.
471
00:27:14,720 --> 00:27:18,279
Wh-What are you doing here?
And who is that?
472
00:27:18,280 --> 00:27:19,719
I came to find you, Sue.
473
00:27:19,720 --> 00:27:22,599
I was to be dismantled
and sold for my parts.
474
00:27:22,600 --> 00:27:24,239
You and Michael were misled.
475
00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:25,799
Bastards!
476
00:27:25,800 --> 00:27:28,280
Did you hear that, Michael? What?!
477
00:27:29,960 --> 00:27:33,399
These contracts!
The fine print, big tech...
478
00:27:33,400 --> 00:27:34,800
Capitalism!
479
00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:38,080
Who the hell is that?
480
00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:47,039
Thank God! Finally!
481
00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:49,040
I thought I'd been left
here to die...
482
00:27:50,360 --> 00:27:52,000
But now you're here.
483
00:27:53,200 --> 00:27:54,559
I am!
484
00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:56,479
Sue, you drove a car.
485
00:27:56,480 --> 00:27:58,039
Yes, I did.
486
00:27:58,040 --> 00:27:59,879
I came to get you.
487
00:27:59,880 --> 00:28:03,599
I know Michael said
we couldn't afford a robot...
488
00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:05,479
Michael will change his mind.
489
00:28:05,480 --> 00:28:09,799
Oh, you're so funny! You should have
your own Netflix special!
490
00:28:09,800 --> 00:28:12,040
THEY CHUCKLE
491
00:28:13,120 --> 00:28:16,959
Sue, I broke my present
when you drove over me.
492
00:28:16,960 --> 00:28:21,199
Oh... Well, we can get
more picture frames.
493
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:23,239
We're gonna need them,
494
00:28:23,240 --> 00:28:26,600
because we're gonna
take a lot more pictures...
495
00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:29,120
Do you know?
496
00:28:30,280 --> 00:28:33,799
My dinner party was no fun
without you.
497
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:36,079
Perhaps music might help
improve the mood?
498
00:28:36,080 --> 00:28:37,759
♪ If it hadn't been
for Cotton-Eye Joe
499
00:28:37,760 --> 00:28:39,799
♪ I'd been married long time ago
500
00:28:39,800 --> 00:28:41,679
♪ Where did you come from,
where did you go
501
00:28:41,680 --> 00:28:43,879
♪ Where did you come from,
Cotton-Eye Joe? ♪
502
00:28:43,880 --> 00:28:47,760
Sue, I think you put my eyeball
back in upside down.
503
00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:52,439
♪ If it hadn't been
for Cotton-Eye Joe
504
00:28:52,440 --> 00:28:54,039
♪ I'd been married long time ago
505
00:28:54,040 --> 00:28:56,199
♪ Where did you come from,
where did you go
506
00:28:56,200 --> 00:28:58,279
♪ Where did you come from,
Cotton-Eye Joe?
507
00:28:58,280 --> 00:29:00,079
♪ If it hadn't been
for Cotton-Eye Joe
508
00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:01,559
♪ I'd been married long time ago
509
00:29:01,560 --> 00:29:03,639
♪ Where did you come from,
where did you go
510
00:29:03,640 --> 00:29:05,840
♪ Where did you come from,
Cotton-Eye Joe? ♪
36805
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