Original subtitles

[alarm blaring]

Oh! Thank God you're back.

What is going on?

Long story. Lots of twists and turns.

-Some dramatic irony. -Cliff notes, Gary.

-The Kaupe is out. -[Hank] Director Sharpe.

Gary, take him down to lockup.

Aww!

What an adorable little puppet.

Eat my fuzzy dung, you dick!

Well, well, well.

Look who finally decided to show up for work.

Nice of you to grace us with your presence, Director Sharpe.

One of your employees let a creature loose,

and then not surprisingly got attacked by it.

Wait. Mona let him out? Why would she--

I want that wolfman back in his cell or you're done.

And fire that girl.

Of all the days this could happen.

All right, everyone.

Screen all calls to animal control and 911.

Pull CCTV from every corner in a ten-mile radius.

Let's go.

-Don't listen to him. -Sara, he's right.

I never should've left Mona in charge of those fugitives.

I should've been here and instead I was off gallivanting like a...

Like a Legend?

Look, we're on this.

That Kaupe doesn't stand a chance.

I'll fix this.

-Our potty mouth puppet is locked up. -Wonderful.

Because I've got another job for you, Gary.

But you're not gonna like it.

[groans]

[gasps]

Ow!

Mom? Dad?

What's going on?

You were in a cycling accident.

[speaking Mandarin]

[in English] I wasn't on a bike. I was scratched by...

Konane, let go! [groans]

[stammers] Oh, no. He's out there alone.

Who?

I can't talk about it. It's work-related. Top secret.

[both speaking Mandarin]

[in English] We have failed as parents.

-It's all your fault. -[both speaking Mandarin]

[in English] Gary.

Oh, my God. I'm happy to see you.

My parents won't believe what I really do for work.

Oh? You mean betraying the people that gave you a chance?

Ava believed in you and you let her down.

You let us all down.

Gary, what are you talking about?

You released a dangerous beast and now he's out there running free.

Wait. You think I let the Kaupe out?

It was the men in black.

-Didn't you see the bodies? -No.

There was only footage of you letting the hairy hunk man out.

Now there's me telling you...

You're fired.

You can't fire me.

I swear there were two men who came for Konane, but he killed them.

Sorry, Mona.

I really liked you, you know, and I know it hurts now

but in a few seconds you won't remember a thing.

Don't you dare. I need my mind!

You do not have clearance to handle this device.

You can't take my memories!

Uh... What was I doing here?

You're here to give me your jacket.

Right, right, right.

And also you were gonna give me your time courier.

Oh, yeah.

Now take my place, it's almost lunchtime.

Oh.

Ooh! Jell-O.

[rustling]

I know you're there.

Stop following me or I'll turn your brain into pudding.

Konane?

You're alive.

I was so worried they'd find you.

Don't worry about that.

I know you didn't mean to hurt me.

[tires screeching]

It's them! Run!

-[car doors opening] -I won't let them get you.

I'll close this behind you so they won't be able to follow.

-Mona. -I have to keep you safe. Go!

-[grunts] -Mona! Mona.

You're safe. We're the good guys.

Oh, yeah? Who sent you?

Was it the Bureau or the men in black?

Where is the wolfman?

He's gone. It's too late.

You'll never find him because I don't even know where he went.

So, grill me all you want. You--

[gasps] [thuds]

What kind of gun is this?

Did you just try to "shoot her" shoot her?

Any hits?

I tried to isolate the portal from today's courier activity

-but so far no dice. -[sighs]

It would help if I had the actual courier.

Sure. Here you go.

Okay, never mind.

So we have a vicious monster on the loose

and no idea where it might have disappeared to.

He's not a vicious monster.

People just assume that because of the way he looks.

-He's a demigod. He used to be a king. -[cocks gun]

Hey, what are you doing?

Seeing if this thing works on her mouth.

Or how about we just give our guest the dignity of hearing her story first.

[grunts]

I'm telling you.

The men in black are behind all of this.

They're framing me so they can keep hurting the magical creatures.

Hurting them how?

I don't know, but Konane was terrified when they came for him.

I was just trying to help him.

Mona, we saw the security footage and...

There were no men in black, just you.

Well, they must have altered the footage to hide the truth.

I'm like Mulder

and those guys are the shadow government covering their tracks.

It's a conspiracy. The truth is out there!

Okay, Fox, okay, Fox! Take a breath!

We believe you.

Right, Sara?

Yes. We do.

And we're gonna get to the bottom of this

but first, we need to find the Kaupe before he hurts himself.

Can you help us do that?

So, I'll head to the Bureau and do some digging?

What? No.

I need you on the hunt for that monster.

-But you said-- -Exactly what I needed to say.

That girl is clearly bonkers, but the Kaupe trusts her

and we need her as bait.

What if she's not crazy?

What if there really is a cover-up with the Bureau?

Then Ava would know about it and she wouldn't allow it.

[Gideon] Captain, I have found a lead on our missing Kaupe.

In Mexico City, 1961,

an unidentified drug cartel member was found dead,

apparently, the work of a wild animal non-indigenous to the region.

That must be him.

All right, fine.

Do some digging through the footage but keep your head down.

-We don't wanna raise any red flags. -Got it.

Gideon, rally the troops. We're going to Mexico.

I'm picking up a magical signature this way.

As far as hiding places go, smack bang in the center of a major city

would not be my top choice.

What is this place?

[crowd cheering]

Whoa! It sounds like a real party.

As long as there's beer.

The detector must be wrong.

There's no way Konane could hide in a place like this.

Are you sure about that?

"El Lobo." The Kaupe isn't hiding.

He is the main event.

[crowd cheering]

Ooh!

[Charlie on comms] Blimey.

How'd our hairy friend end up with that lot?

It doesn't surprise me in the slightest.

Lucha libre wrestling is all about character and charisma.

The modern day morality play.

Good versus evil. The people versus the man.

Well, according to the altered historical record,

El Lobo arrived on the scene six months ago

and quickly rose to the top.

The mystery surrounding his true identity

inspired novels, movies and TV shows.

Oh, bollocks. This is the one I get sidelined for?

All right, let's split up.

Ray and Charlie stay on the comms, John and I will cover the arena.

You guys watch from the stands.

[announcer speaking Spanish]

[in English] Tonight, you will witness a spectacular match,

one that you will tell your grandchildren of in vivid detail.

-[all cheering] -[bell dings]

[Constantine speaking Spanish]

[in English] Hey, we're working.

We can't afford any screw-ups on this one.

We gotta bag this guy quick.

Gotta stay sharp, you mean.

[announcer speaking Spanish]

[crowd booing]

[in English] Oh, chillax, love. El Lobo ain't going nowhere.

It's true. He's impossible to get rid of.

I tried over and over. He won't go away.

Hold the bloody phone.

Are you El Cura?

[Sara] You know this guy?

Anyone who knows anything about Mexican culture knows El Cura

the legendary luchador and movie star.

No.

You know, I loved your monster movies, mate.

Whoever wrote those gems had a better handle on magic

than any of those tosspots up in Hollywood.

I haven't been in any movies, mi amigo.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's all this?

You're the warrior of piety and goodness.

You don't drink, not that I'm one to judge.

I didn't. Until this hairy tonto showed up

and stole everything from me.

And finally, the man... No,

the legend you have all come here to see...

You mean the thief.

...the undefeated champion.

The hero of the people!

El Lobo!

-[roaring] -[entrance music playing]

[crowd cheering]

[announcer speaking Spanish] [crowd whistling]

[in English] We don't have eyes on the Kaupe. He's lying low.

I need this wrapped up before tonight, Nathaniel.

I can't have it hanging over my head during the benefit.

It's going to be fine.

You guys have been throwing this fundraiser

since the first Bush administration.

Oh! Is that Nathaniel?

Yes, dear. But this is a work matter. -Yes, I need-- -I--

Please. Thank you. Thank you.

Hello, sweetie.

So, don't forget the benefit is tonight.

Mom, I don't know if I'm gonna make it this year.

I have a work emergency.

-Work can wait. Right, Hank? -No.

Yeah, your father is nodding.

Okay, darling. See you here at 7:00.

[kisses] Bye.

I... No...

[exhales]

-[bell dings] -[both grunting]

[bell dings]

Damn, he's good.

He's too good.

In lucha libre, every match tells a story.

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose so you can rise again.

But there are rules. There is a plan.

With this guy, there's no rules, there's no plan.

He just wins every time.

Oh, so that's why you're here, eh? Drowning your sorrows,

rather than being up there where you belong.

Listen, mate. I've had my fair share of defeats these past days,

but lying on your ass, it's no way to get your mojo back.

[crowd counting in Spanish]

-[bell dings] -[howling]

[crowd cheering]

[growls]

Look at him.

This is what he's always wanted.

To be worshipped and admired like the demigod he is.

Not feared and shunned like some monster.

Well, he better make the most of it.

The second he gets backstage, it's lights out

and back to the Time Bureau.

That wasn't the plan. He can't go back to the Time Bureau.

-It's not safe. -Not my call. Don't care.

Oh. Good, it's just you.

What are you doing here?

I was digging.

Mona claims the footage you saw earlier was doctored. That there's a cover-up around the creature's escape.

And you believe this tiny cuckoo?

Maybe you should too.

According to these deleted access logs,

security footage was removed and replaced

earlier this morning from a wireless device.

Now all I have to do is figure out who that phone number belongs to.

You don't have to. I know the number.

It belongs to my dad.

-[wrestling bell dings] -[crowd cheering]

El Lobo triumphs again!

[Sara] Okay, Mona.

Make sure he sees you as he leaves the ring, then bring him backstage,

and we'll meet you there.

Konane!

El Lobo! You thief!

-You cheat! -[growling]

You have disgraced this ring.

You have stolen victories from too many of us.

And I'm going to put a stop to it.

I challenge you to a lucha de apuestas!

[all murmuring]

The loser will take off his mask

and forfeit and never set foot in the ring ever again.

[growling]

You heard it here, ladies and gentleman.

The gauntlet has been thrown.

Do you accept this match and its conditions, señor?

[all cheering]

Then the fight is on!

Tomorrow night. Same time, same place.

This will be one for the history books.

Get your tickets now!

So, he's back on track, historically-speaking.

Now how's that for a bang-up job, Lancey?

-Excuse me. Coming through. -Hey, get back here.

What is going on?

Out of my way, fanboys.

Get out! [groans]

Damn it! Mona's gonna get herself trampled.

[snarling]

You can say what you will, but that Kaupe,

he's a real gent in my book.

So this is where you've been living.

Wow!

[chuckles] I like what you've done with the place.

It's... It's homey.

It's like you're back on the island.

You miss Hawaii, don't you?

Home. You miss home?

Home.

Mona home.

Do I miss home?

Eh, you know.

Guilt-tripping parents, lack of a job.

No one who understands me.

Wow, that's beautiful.

[laughs]

Mona.

There has to be a logical reason why Hank replaced the footage.

So let's think about it.

Look, I get that you and your dad are in a good place

for the first time in a while,

but we just can't ignore that this is happening.

But can we please reserve judgement until we see the footage?

Sure, the original footage can only be restored

from the device used to delete it.

You mean my dad's phone?

Yeah.

We gotta go for it tonight.

He's gonna be distracted.

He's gonna be boozing and schmoozing at the benefit gala.

I have a plus one. Are you in?

Yeah. Okay.

You know, as long as we don't have to do that thing

where we act like we're dating.

You and I dating would be totally weird.

Totally weird. Yeah. Um...

Text me the details and I will meet you there.

Yeah. Bye.

I must be really hungry because that actually looks kind of good.

What is it?

Where is he, Mona?

He's gone. You scared him off.

We just want to make sure he doesn't hurt anyone, love.

He isn't like that.

He's sweet and gentle.

He won't hurt any--

[growling] [groans]

Eat this, you furball.

[Mona] Konane, stop!

-[gunshot] -[gasps]

You got one messed up definition of sweet. -[door opens] -Hey, Gideon said you...

Wow.

-You got a date? -No. It's not a date.

I am dressed like this

because the footage you saw at the Bureau earlier

was definitely altered... by Hank.

Okay, before I do the math on this, are you sure?

Yeah, Mona was telling the truth.

There is a cover-up at the Bureau.

What are the chances that Ava's wrapped up in this?

Honestly, I don't know yet, but if she's not a part of it then...

She's probably in a lot of danger.

[elevator bell dings]

Gary!

Close that hospital gown or I will report you to HR.

Where the hell have you been all day?

I don't know who I am.

I don't know why anything is things.

I don't know where my nipple went.

Where is my nipple?

-Where is my nipple! -Gary.

He was so scared.

I had to do something to stop them.

-Where were they taking him? -Somewhere terrible.

That's why he can't go back to the Bureau.

The men in black are gonna hurt him again or worse.

Well, he can't stay in Mexico.

So, take him back home.

Back to ancient Hawaii, to his old kingdom.

You saw him in the arena. He's meant to be a king.

-Mona, it is not that simple. -Why?

[Gideon] Captain, you're being hailed by Director Sharpe.

That is why.

Gideon, I'll take it on the bridge.

[Gideon] I'm afraid she's overridden my security protocols.

Ava! Wow! Look at you.

-You look great. -Yeah, thanks.

But listen, Sara, the situation with the Kaupe has gotten much worse.

He now has an accomplice, Mona Wu.

Now, she may not look it, but she is extremely dangerous.

She completely wiped Gary's mind.

-[chair creaks] -[Sara] Um...

Wait, you've had Mona in custody this whole time and you didn't--

It's a long story, but I need to explain to you in person.

This line might not be secure.

The line isn't secure, Sara, what are you--

[growls]

You have the Kaupe, too?

Look, I can't explain right now.

Okay, then I'm sending an extraction team.

Gideon, mask our location.

Sara, you need to bring in that fugitive now.

I'm sorry.

Don't you dare hang up on--

[sighs]

Whoa!

Did you just hang up on your girlfriend?

Mona, you better not be wrong about this.

I need to go to that benefit so I can talk to Ava face to face.

Before you leave, I have a petition to become interim captain

of the Waverider in your absence.

I have a John Hancock from every Legend except you.

It looks like you crossed out part of Rory's signature.

Really?

The team is to keep a low profile.

Radio silence and absolutely no time travel.

Captain Palmer has got it covered.

Interim captain.

[door closes]

[Ray] After your recent, unfortunate misadventures in time travel,

I created a team-building card game

to help you learn the dos and don'ts of our prior missions.

I'm calling it...

[reading]

Fun way to learn from your mistakes, right?

Oh, you got to be joking. "Vandal Savage."

That's a real name.

And here's me thinking that Damien Darhk's moniker

was a touch on the nose.

[Gideon] Sorry to interrupt,

but I'm detecting a disturbance in the timeline.

-Yes! -Oh, thank God. [sighs]

[Gideon] In the wake of El Lobo's sudden disappearance

from the lucha libre scene, rumors spread of government censorship.

Country-wide protest erupted

and dozens were killed in the ensuing riots.

Well, I'm sure we can figure something out once Sara gets back.

In the meantime, it's game time.

-[both] Oh! -Come off it.

I mean, weren't you just nattering on about team-building experiences?

Well, let's go out there and actually fix something.

[scoffs] Well, yeah, but Sara said to stay put.

Oh! Come on, Raymundo.

This isn't just important for some dusty old history book.

This is important for the people of Mexico.

All we need to do is make sure

that the luchas de apuestas fight goes on.

And make sure that El Cura comes out on top.

-Grand finale. -Yeah. -Come on, Rage. -Come on, Rage.

Let's give the people what they want.

Let's give 'em what they need.

Let's prepare ourselves to wrestle!

Or we could just go.

-[classical music playing] -[guests chattering]

Why throw such a big fancy party

if you're only going to have tiny, little treats?

Nathaniel, darling.

Hello. Yes.

Is this your new girlfriend?

-Mmm-hmm. -Yeah. This is Zari.

Zari. What a beautiful name for a beautiful woman

-with excellent child-bearing hips. -[coughs]

Not to put a clock on it or anything, but grandchildren would be so lovely.

-Mmm-hmm. -Anyhoo,

I'd better go make sure everything is good

with your father's speech.

Oh, my God. That went well. Are you...

Are you blushing right now?

No, shut up. Take my toothpick. Stay on task.

We are here to get your dad's phone. That's it.

[tango music playing]

You better have a damn good reason for hanging up on me.

Where is the Kaupe and why isn't he in Bureau custody?

-What are you doing? -Making sure we're not overheard.

By who?

Sara, my ass is already on the line.

Feeling me up in front of my boss is not a good idea right now.

-He didn't plant anything on you. -What?

That's good.

Please tell me that nutcase Mona hasn't gotten to you.

Just dance.

I think Mona was onto something

about secret agents trying to infiltrate the Bureau.

That is insane.

-Sara-- -Just listen to me.

The security footage was altered and I think Mona was framed.

Fr-- [spits]

Even if that was true, which I doubt, you are still harboring a fugitive.

-Ava-- -Hand him over now.

We can deal with the rest of this later.

You know I can't do that.

Then this conversation is over.

[grunting]

Hey, could you help me out, amigo?

I think I might be stuck.

It's time to whip you back into fighting shape, eh, mate.

Okay, you need to shake off that ring rust

by tomorrow night so that you can win.

What the hell is he doing here?

-[growls] -Whoa! Be nice. Be nice.

Look, just as you're here to practice winning,

he's here to practice losing, all right?

I don't trust him.

He's never done choreography.

For the people to accept me as their hero again,

my victory must be absolute.

Well, you'd better get to work then, hadn't you?

[upbeat Mexican music playing]

Gentle, El Lobo, gentle.

-[both cheer] -That's what I'm talking about, El Cura.

You think he could still pull off his finishing move?

Sure, muscle memory will kick in.

[El Cura groans]

Konane!

[howling]

[El Cura groaning]

You can't train the mutt.

Konane.

I know you don't like losing, but it doesn't make you any less of a king.

In fact, it makes you a hero.

Like Buck, in my favorite Rebecca Silver book.

Wait, wait, wait.

Where Buck crash lands on Garima's home planet

and then is forced into mortal combat.

That one?

Yeah, you've read it?

Heard of it.

Konane...

[speaking native language]

Buck loved Garima and he didn't wanna hurt her sister.

So he threw the contest

and the two star-crossed lovers escaped into the night.

If you lose tomorrow, me and you can escape, too.

I'll take you back to Hawaii.

We can make a life together just like Buck and Garima.

[grunts]

Let's clear out.

Ava.

Where are you going?

Mexico City, 1961.

What, you didn't think I'd find out?

The Bureau is running just fine, Sara, and we will catch that damn Kaupe.

On behalf of the American Hemophilia Foundation,

I am honored to introduce

tonight's recipient of the Altruistic Angel Award,

-Henry Heywood. -[guests applauding]

Hey, Pops, Pops, Pops.

How about a quick pic?

You know, for Facebook or whatever you old people overshare on.

-Come on, Mom. -Yep.

-Okay, say "grandbabies." -[camera clicking]

Damn it, Ray. What happened to keeping a low profile?

It's a long story, but this fight must happen

in order to protect history, so, just trust us, okay?

All right, so entering through the north and south wings

is the best chance of catching the Legends off guard.

-Oh! -If you--

Uh... Should I transfer to your private line in case it's,

-you know... Bom chica wow-wow-- -Gary, move.

Ava, I know you're mad, but can we please just talk

about this like adults before doing something rash.

I will put a stop to that fight. Sara, now is not the time

for one of your crazy fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants plans.

Hand over the fugitive before someone gets hurt.

I know this sounds crazy, but there is no way around it.

Letting the Kaupe wrestle is important to Mexico's history.

No, allowing an escaped fugitive to fight

is endangering all of history.

Extraction team, move out.

[announcer] Introducing the fallen hero.

Once beloved, now disgraced, a man clawing for a comeback,

El Cura!

-[entrance music playing] -[crowd booing]

El Cura! El Cura! El Cura!

They're fairweather fans, mate.

Don't worry, you'll prove them wrong.

[announcer] And now, the man you are all here to see,

the undefeated champion of the people, El Lobo!

-[entrance music playing] -[crowd cheering]

[growling]

Bring it in, gentlemen.

Now I want a good, clean fight.

No biting, no scratching. Nothing below the belt.

All right, to your corners.

[Hank] The strongest of us will never know

what it's like to live with this disorder.

And that's why I called my work...

Okay, moment of truth.

Because victory is possible.

In fact, it's inevitable.

I don't accept this Altruistic Angel Award for myself

as some pat on the back.

I receive it as a call to arms.

Let's all come together and end this fight.

-[groans] -Oh!

All right, take it easy, remember? Come on, shake it off, mate, shake it off.

Look, I know you feel like throwing in the towel right now, but trust me,

there's nothing people like more than a good comeback. Now go.

[growling]

[all cheering]

You're losing so good. Keep it up.

Play dead, furball.

[El Cura yells]

[bell dings]

Ladies and gentlemen, this is an emergency evacuation.

Please exit the building in an orderly fashion.

We have some uninvited guests here, Sara.

Give them hell. That's an order.

No outside interference.

Finally, a real fight!

[Mexican music playing] Yeah!

-[shouts] -[cheering]

These fools are trying to censor us.

But we ain't gonna stand for that, are we?

On your left, mate.

Nice one, Raymundo.

Now, El Cura and his mates

they fight for the people.

The people!

Now this is what I call a bloody good show.

[Charlie] He didn't abandon you!

Have a towel, mate.

So, don't you dare abandon him!

[all cheering]

-[groans] -Whoa!

Come on!

[El Cura yelling]

-[bell dings] -Yeah!

Yeah! Yeah!

[chanting]

[crowd chanting] Cura! Cura! Cura!

[chanting continues]

I reckon we should team-build like this more often, Legends.

[sighs]

Well, looks like you've saved history again.

Congratulations, Sara.

-Ava, just let me explain-- -No need.

It's all very clear to me.

Ava, please don't hang up...

On me. Some night, huh?

We just raised over $500,000.

Roaring success.

I saw the footage, Hank.

The real footage.

Nathaniel, it was you who convinced me to fund the Bureau.

Don't...

Please don't remind me.

-I went out on a limb for you. -Mmm-hmm.

I need you to trust me on this. There's a purpose to what you saw.

Of course I trust you.

I just need you to bring me in on these sort of things.

-In due time, son. -[cell phone ringing]

I got to take this.

Yeah.

You cloned all the data off that phone, right?

Uh-huh.

Good.

Keep digging.

I wanna know everything.

What do you mean you couldn't capture the asset?

[agent] Blame it on your son's time-traveling pals, sir.

How would you like us to proceed?

[both laughing]

Kid, come here.

[Mick exhales deeply]

There's something about Buck and Garima you should know.

They didn't live happily ever after.

They came from two different worlds.

Worlds that needed them.

They didn't belong together,

but they loved one another...

A lot.

How do you know?

The next book in the series hasn't even been published yet.

I just do!

Here.

Don't do anything stupid.

I'm gonna take a leak.

I brought snickerdoodles.

I'll just... Put them here.

Ava, look, I'm sorry. I didn't come here to fight. I...

I know things got ugly between us today,

but I just wanna put it behind us.

I needed one thing from you today, Sara.

For you to be in my corner.

That's all I asked.

Well, I'm here now.

Well, that's great.

Just in time for my meeting with Hank,

where I'll probably be fired, thanks to you.

Ava...

Hank is the real problem here.

I mean, he's been torturing prisoners off-site--

Who cares?

A few weeks ago, the Legends were sending them to hell.

I mean, since when is protecting magical creatures,

things that shouldn't even be in our world in the first place,

more important than protecting me?

And when have you become so callous about the prisoners in your care?

My priority is to protect history, Sara.

Human history.

If Hank has to experiment on a few creatures

to try to find a better way to fight them, then so be it.

Ava, you do not believe that.

Come on, I know you.

You're not like Hank.

Look, this is your Bureau

and he's doing something twisted with it.

You don't understand how any of this works.

No, Hank is the reason that this Bureau is here.

If we piss him off, it all goes away.

Think of how many people, how many human people

-would get hurt if that happened. -Well, he can't shut us down.

Oh, my God! Sara, everything is not about you.

Do you understand you're asking me to risk everything?

For what? For some conspiracy theory? For a bunch of monsters? I'd...

For me.

Well, I've already given you everything I have to give. So...

Today, I asked you for one thing.

Ava, don't do this.

Just go. I'm done.

[door closes]

[crying]

Well, Konane, it's time for our new adventure.

Konane, I...

I can't.

I wanna live in your world.

I mean, look at it.

It's beautiful.

But I don't belong there.

[grunting]

If I went, I'd just be running away from my world

and that's not the right reason to leave everything behind.

-[gunshot] -[groans]

-You murdered him. -Step away from the creature, miss.

No.

-I said step away. -[crying]

You murdered him!

[growling]

[growling continues]

[agent screaming]

What the...

You were right.

There's no such thing as happily ever after.