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1
00:00:01,767 --> 00:00:04,197
(soft music)
2
00:00:08,200 --> 00:00:11,300
(upbeat theme music)
3
00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:36,730
(lively music)
4
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:00,600
- Big and bouncy dot com
at this time of the day?
5
00:01:00,600 --> 00:01:01,400
- Don't ask.
6
00:01:01,400 --> 00:01:02,570
Your bleedin' mother.
7
00:01:02,567 --> 00:01:04,597
- Not on big and
bouncy dot com I hope?
8
00:01:04,600 --> 00:01:06,100
- Do me a favor.
9
00:01:06,100 --> 00:01:09,070
She's asked me to set up a
call to your Aunty Pam again.
10
00:01:09,067 --> 00:01:10,967
- She misses her.
11
00:01:10,967 --> 00:01:12,597
- She should get your dad
to buy her a laptop then,
12
00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:15,130
instead of pissing about
with mine all the time.
13
00:01:15,133 --> 00:01:16,073
- [Sue] Yoohoo!
14
00:01:16,067 --> 00:01:17,067
It's only me.
15
00:01:17,067 --> 00:01:19,727
- Right, it's all set up.
16
00:01:19,733 --> 00:01:22,333
Just, double click on
dial, it's ready to go.
17
00:01:22,333 --> 00:01:23,303
- Oh, thanks, love.
18
00:01:24,767 --> 00:01:27,497
Hey, guess what?
19
00:01:27,500 --> 00:01:28,530
- What?
20
00:01:28,533 --> 00:01:29,833
- Just guess.
21
00:01:29,833 --> 00:01:31,433
- You got a re-tweet
from George Michael?
22
00:01:31,433 --> 00:01:35,073
- No, be realistic,
chicken fluff.
23
00:01:35,067 --> 00:01:36,067
- Have they guessed yet?
24
00:01:36,067 --> 00:01:37,527
- You've won something?
25
00:01:37,533 --> 00:01:39,373
- Ish.
26
00:01:39,367 --> 00:01:40,767
- Can't you just tell us?
27
00:01:40,767 --> 00:01:41,967
- Selected.
28
00:01:41,967 --> 00:01:43,627
- To take part in something?
29
00:01:43,633 --> 00:01:46,473
- Bingo, kidder you're getting
warmer by the millisecond.
30
00:01:46,467 --> 00:01:48,367
We, kids, have been selected for
31
00:01:48,367 --> 00:01:52,197
the over-50s regional ice
skating final in October.
32
00:01:52,200 --> 00:01:53,930
- That's fantastic.
33
00:01:53,933 --> 00:01:56,073
- We're going choosing
outfits after I've talked to
34
00:01:56,067 --> 00:01:59,327
your Aunty Pam and your
dad's done your bulbs.
35
00:01:59,333 --> 00:02:00,403
- What bulbs?
36
00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:02,100
- Do you want that lift or not?
37
00:02:02,100 --> 00:02:03,770
- Definitely.
38
00:02:03,767 --> 00:02:04,697
See you, Mum!
- Bye.
39
00:02:04,700 --> 00:02:05,630
- See you, Dad!
- Bye.
40
00:02:05,633 --> 00:02:06,673
- [Sue] Byeúbye, Chicks, bye.
41
00:02:08,767 --> 00:02:10,397
- [Lisa] Hiya, love.
42
00:02:10,400 --> 00:02:11,600
- Hiya Lisa it's me.
43
00:02:11,600 --> 00:02:14,300
Can you apologize to Shelly.
44
00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:16,270
- Why luv, what's happened?
45
00:02:16,267 --> 00:02:17,467
- My job.
46
00:02:17,467 --> 00:02:18,467
I can't do it.
47
00:02:18,467 --> 00:02:20,167
I just can't go in.
48
00:02:20,167 --> 00:02:21,427
- Course you can.
49
00:02:21,433 --> 00:02:22,803
You know that job like
the back of your hand.
50
00:02:22,800 --> 00:02:25,300
- But I don't want to
leave Joshua, Lisa.
51
00:02:26,267 --> 00:02:27,267
- Where are you?
52
00:02:27,267 --> 00:02:28,967
- John Leigh Park.
53
00:02:28,967 --> 00:02:29,797
- Wait there.
54
00:02:31,733 --> 00:02:32,873
- Detour?
55
00:02:32,867 --> 00:02:33,897
- [Lisa] Do you mind?
56
00:02:35,267 --> 00:02:37,667
(soft music)
57
00:02:44,067 --> 00:02:45,227
- Happy birthday, Bianca.
58
00:02:46,700 --> 00:02:47,500
- Thank you.
59
00:02:50,067 --> 00:02:51,097
- Where's Dad?
60
00:02:51,100 --> 00:02:52,630
- In his shed.
61
00:02:52,633 --> 00:02:54,633
You really are very
kind doing this.
62
00:02:54,633 --> 00:02:57,503
You really didn't need to
go to all this trouble.
63
00:02:57,500 --> 00:02:58,800
- He's forgotten, hasn't he?
64
00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:00,170
- Has he heck.
65
00:03:00,167 --> 00:03:01,567
He's just busy with
his stealth bomber.
66
00:03:01,567 --> 00:03:02,897
- In other words, yes.
67
00:03:02,900 --> 00:03:04,630
- Don't give it another thought.
68
00:03:04,633 --> 00:03:07,303
We hardly bother with birthdays
in this household anyway.
69
00:03:07,300 --> 00:03:09,870
It's just another year,
means nothing, really.
70
00:03:09,867 --> 00:03:12,327
- And did you ask him about
coming to watch me play?
71
00:03:12,333 --> 00:03:13,303
- I did mention it, yes.
72
00:03:13,300 --> 00:03:14,800
- And?
73
00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:17,400
- I think he's worried it's
going to clash with his show.
74
00:03:17,400 --> 00:03:18,800
- But the show's
not till next week.
75
00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:20,570
- I mean preparing for his show.
76
00:03:20,567 --> 00:03:22,067
- Preparing his stealth bomber?
77
00:03:22,067 --> 00:03:23,467
- Yes, cock.
78
00:03:23,467 --> 00:03:24,427
- There's a pattern
forming here isn't there.
79
00:03:24,433 --> 00:03:25,373
- [Bianca] It doesn't matter.
80
00:03:25,367 --> 00:03:26,197
- He forgets your birthday.
81
00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:27,130
- He hasn't forgotten.
82
00:03:27,133 --> 00:03:28,403
- And he can't be arsed watching
83
00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:29,830
me play football.
- He's a busy man.
84
00:03:29,833 --> 00:03:31,673
- Who doesn't give a shit about
anyone other than himself.
85
00:03:31,667 --> 00:03:32,767
- That's not true.
86
00:03:32,767 --> 00:03:34,297
And curb the
language, potty mouth.
87
00:03:35,733 --> 00:03:36,573
- Sorry.
88
00:03:37,467 --> 00:03:38,897
Enjoy your brekkie.
89
00:03:38,900 --> 00:03:40,270
I'm going for a kick about.
90
00:03:43,133 --> 00:03:45,773
- It's amazing, really,
when you think about it,
91
00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:48,467
we've been whittled down
from over 20 couples!
92
00:03:48,467 --> 00:03:50,297
- That's smashing.
93
00:03:50,300 --> 00:03:51,800
Ooh, it's all go, isn't it?
94
00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:54,230
Guess what's been
happening here?
95
00:03:54,233 --> 00:03:55,233
- I'm all ears.
96
00:03:55,233 --> 00:03:56,473
- The extension's finished.
97
00:03:56,467 --> 00:03:57,927
- Already?
98
00:03:57,933 --> 00:04:01,203
- Yeah I've got a few more
things to do with the spare room
99
00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:03,600
but it'll be finished
by next week.
100
00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:05,730
Well, have you
mentioned to Barry yet?
101
00:04:05,733 --> 00:04:06,573
- Not yet.
102
00:04:07,733 --> 00:04:08,733
- Hiya, Pam!
103
00:04:10,300 --> 00:04:11,900
- Talk of the devil!
104
00:04:11,900 --> 00:04:13,570
Go on, tell him.
105
00:04:14,733 --> 00:04:16,103
- He's gone.
106
00:04:16,100 --> 00:04:17,130
- Gone?
107
00:04:17,133 --> 00:04:18,233
Barry!
- No.
108
00:04:18,233 --> 00:04:20,873
He's planting his bulbs.
109
00:04:20,867 --> 00:04:22,567
- Well, the moment
the wardrobes are in
110
00:04:22,567 --> 00:04:24,297
I want you both to come over.
111
00:04:24,300 --> 00:04:28,170
What is the point in a spare
room if nobody uses it?
112
00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:32,070
(soft music)
113
00:04:37,067 --> 00:04:39,567
- I just couldn't take him in.
114
00:04:40,967 --> 00:04:43,167
- Nothing's changed since you
took him for his half day,
115
00:04:43,167 --> 00:04:45,327
though, when you think about it.
116
00:04:45,333 --> 00:04:46,473
- Everything's changed.
117
00:04:46,467 --> 00:04:48,127
It was only till 12.
118
00:04:48,133 --> 00:04:49,933
This is totally different.
119
00:04:49,933 --> 00:04:51,773
This is till half bloody five.
120
00:04:51,767 --> 00:04:53,397
- You can call them
every 20 minutes,
121
00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:55,900
like they suggested,
if you really need to?
122
00:04:55,900 --> 00:04:57,300
- I'll look neurotic.
123
00:04:57,300 --> 00:04:58,270
- So?
124
00:04:58,267 --> 00:04:59,767
You've got a baby.
125
00:04:59,767 --> 00:05:01,797
Isn't that what everybody
is when they've got a baby?
126
00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:02,730
- Suppose so.
127
00:05:02,733 --> 00:05:04,073
- [Lisa] So you won't be letting
128
00:05:04,067 --> 00:05:05,067
the side down then, will you?
129
00:05:05,067 --> 00:05:06,267
- I'll be letting you down.
130
00:05:06,267 --> 00:05:07,427
I can't do my job
properly anymore.
131
00:05:07,433 --> 00:05:10,133
- But that's not
happened yet, has it?
132
00:05:10,133 --> 00:05:11,673
- No.
133
00:05:11,667 --> 00:05:14,767
- So we can cross that bridge
when we come to it, can't we?
134
00:05:14,767 --> 00:05:18,767
And, in the meantime,
your son has got lots
135
00:05:18,767 --> 00:05:20,467
of new friends to
make, hasn't he?
136
00:05:21,733 --> 00:05:22,903
- Yeah.
137
00:05:22,900 --> 00:05:24,730
Suppose he has.
138
00:05:24,733 --> 00:05:26,933
- Well, get your arse
in gear cos they'll
139
00:05:26,933 --> 00:05:31,203
be waiting for him, just like
Reconnect is waiting for you.
140
00:05:34,667 --> 00:05:35,497
Come on.
141
00:05:37,500 --> 00:05:38,800
- But what about Alan?
142
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:40,070
- What about him?
143
00:05:40,067 --> 00:05:42,497
- I'm not putting
him into quarantine.
144
00:05:42,500 --> 00:05:44,070
What if they put him
in with a Great Dane?
145
00:05:44,067 --> 00:05:45,767
I'd never forgive myself.
146
00:05:45,767 --> 00:05:48,227
- They've got doggie
passports these days.
147
00:05:48,233 --> 00:05:50,633
They don't need quarantine.
148
00:05:50,633 --> 00:05:53,073
Stop making excuses, Sue.
149
00:05:53,067 --> 00:05:55,367
It's 85 out there at the moment.
150
00:05:55,367 --> 00:05:57,067
Not a single cloud.
151
00:05:58,100 --> 00:05:59,400
Look at the color of that.
152
00:06:03,933 --> 00:06:06,803
- But you've had four
rehearsals already this week.
153
00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:09,070
- And we need four more.
154
00:06:09,067 --> 00:06:10,527
- Can't you ask
Richard or one of the
155
00:06:10,533 --> 00:06:12,903
others to cover for
you just this once?
156
00:06:12,900 --> 00:06:16,330
It's an important match and
he wants you to watch him.
157
00:06:16,333 --> 00:06:18,073
- I know, but Vincent is
going to the rehearsal
158
00:06:18,067 --> 00:06:20,067
and we can't be seen
to be missing it.
159
00:06:20,067 --> 00:06:21,127
- Who's Vincent?
160
00:06:21,133 --> 00:06:22,973
- Vincent Rodriguez.
161
00:06:22,967 --> 00:06:24,197
- You've lost me.
162
00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:25,900
- The health and
safety inspector.
163
00:06:25,900 --> 00:06:27,800
We've got to run through the
display tomorrow morning.
164
00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:30,070
Every airplane, every pilot.
165
00:06:31,700 --> 00:06:33,400
- You're not pilots.
166
00:06:33,400 --> 00:06:35,230
You don't drive the planes.
167
00:06:35,233 --> 00:06:36,533
You control them.
168
00:06:36,533 --> 00:06:38,073
Play with them.
169
00:06:38,067 --> 00:06:40,497
Mess about with them,
Jim, if I'm really honest.
170
00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:42,770
Why can't you see
that just this once,
171
00:06:42,767 --> 00:06:46,797
let someone take over and go
and see your son play football?
172
00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:48,230
It's all he wants.
173
00:06:51,900 --> 00:06:55,200
I can cope with you forgetting
it's my birthday, Jim,
174
00:06:55,200 --> 00:06:58,430
but it's you ignoring your
son's wish to watch him kick
175
00:06:58,433 --> 00:07:01,073
a ball about that
I'm struggling with.
176
00:07:02,867 --> 00:07:03,697
Sorry.
177
00:07:12,200 --> 00:07:14,100
- Hey, what do you think?
178
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:16,600
* We're caught in a trap
179
00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:18,230
- Elvis has had his day, love.
180
00:07:18,233 --> 00:07:19,733
* I can't walk out.
181
00:07:19,733 --> 00:07:22,073
If we're to be noticed, we
need to be contemporary.
182
00:07:22,067 --> 00:07:25,197
* Because I love
ya too much baby *
183
00:07:25,200 --> 00:07:26,230
Pillock alert!
184
00:07:26,233 --> 00:07:27,403
Pillock alert!
185
00:07:28,367 --> 00:07:29,297
- What about Michael Buble?
186
00:07:29,300 --> 00:07:31,100
- Ah, now, cabaret, that's good.
187
00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:34,300
* Fly me to the moon
188
00:07:34,300 --> 00:07:36,300
- I can't skate to that.
- Why not?
189
00:07:36,300 --> 00:07:39,200
Big band week, like
they do on the X Factor?
190
00:07:39,200 --> 00:07:40,870
- What about
country and western?
191
00:07:40,867 --> 00:07:43,097
- Oh, takes years
off you, that does.
192
00:07:43,100 --> 00:07:44,470
- Does it?
193
00:07:44,467 --> 00:07:47,667
* Don't tell my heart
my achy breaky heart *
194
00:07:47,667 --> 00:07:50,327
* I just don't think
they'd understand. *
195
00:07:50,333 --> 00:07:51,933
- Can I help you?
196
00:07:51,933 --> 00:07:55,133
- I think we're beyond help,
love, if we're really honest.
197
00:07:55,133 --> 00:07:56,703
Don't you?
198
00:07:56,700 --> 00:07:59,270
(lively music)
199
00:08:00,633 --> 00:08:02,503
- Aw, is he?
200
00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:05,430
Did he?
201
00:08:06,700 --> 00:08:07,900
And he's not even cried?
202
00:08:09,167 --> 00:08:10,897
Not even a bit?
203
00:08:10,900 --> 00:08:13,070
Aw, thanks so much.
204
00:08:13,067 --> 00:08:16,197
I'll call back in half
an hour if that's okay?
205
00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:17,500
Okay, then thanks bye.
206
00:08:18,867 --> 00:08:22,827
- And today's buzzwords,
pilgrims, are hit and target!
207
00:08:25,100 --> 00:08:25,900
Hi, Denise.
208
00:08:26,867 --> 00:08:28,097
- Hello.
209
00:08:28,100 --> 00:08:29,970
- Really lovely
to have you back.
210
00:08:29,967 --> 00:08:31,197
- Thank you.
211
00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:32,600
It's lovely to be
back, actually.
212
00:08:33,567 --> 00:08:34,397
- Atta girl.
213
00:08:40,433 --> 00:08:41,373
- See?
214
00:08:41,367 --> 00:08:43,067
That wasn't difficult, was it?
215
00:08:43,067 --> 00:08:44,427
- No.
216
00:08:44,433 --> 00:08:46,073
- And the little fella's okay?
217
00:08:46,067 --> 00:08:47,527
- Oh, he's fine.
218
00:08:47,533 --> 00:08:50,803
He's just had a runny poo but
he always does before lunch.
219
00:08:52,367 --> 00:08:53,197
- See I told you.
220
00:08:58,667 --> 00:08:59,627
- Two minutes of your time.
221
00:08:59,633 --> 00:09:00,573
If you don't mind.
222
00:09:04,967 --> 00:09:07,197
Look, I know I've been an idiot.
223
00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:09,670
When I promised I'd
leave you alone,
224
00:09:09,667 --> 00:09:11,267
well, I stuck to it, didn't I?
225
00:09:11,267 --> 00:09:13,327
- Yeah, suppose you did.
226
00:09:13,333 --> 00:09:15,673
- So, now you know you
can trust me again,
227
00:09:15,667 --> 00:09:17,927
how's about we just make a deal?
228
00:09:17,933 --> 00:09:19,173
- Go on.
229
00:09:19,167 --> 00:09:21,897
- Well, the deal is
we forget everything.
230
00:09:21,900 --> 00:09:23,500
Like I say, clean slate.
231
00:09:23,500 --> 00:09:24,930
We both just get
on with our lives.
232
00:09:24,933 --> 00:09:26,133
And our work.
233
00:09:26,133 --> 00:09:27,933
What happened in the
past is dead and buried.
234
00:09:27,933 --> 00:09:28,773
Forgotten.
235
00:09:28,767 --> 00:09:29,597
What do you reckon?
236
00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:32,300
- You really properly mean it?
237
00:09:32,300 --> 00:09:33,400
- Swear on my life.
238
00:09:33,400 --> 00:09:35,800
Cross my heart and hope to die.
239
00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:37,900
By asphyxiation.
240
00:09:37,900 --> 00:09:39,100
- Oh, God, what's that?
241
00:09:39,100 --> 00:09:41,430
- Not very pleasant,
by all accounts.
242
00:09:41,433 --> 00:09:42,433
What do you say?
243
00:09:42,433 --> 00:09:43,533
Clean slate?
244
00:09:43,533 --> 00:09:44,373
- Okay, then.
245
00:09:47,733 --> 00:09:49,503
- Oh, just one more thing.
246
00:09:49,500 --> 00:09:50,770
- What?
247
00:09:50,767 --> 00:09:52,067
- I've had a word with Shelley
248
00:09:52,067 --> 00:09:54,327
and we think you should
move over onto sales.
249
00:09:54,333 --> 00:09:55,773
- Sales?
250
00:09:55,767 --> 00:09:57,497
- You know most of those
accounts like your own anyway.
251
00:09:57,500 --> 00:09:58,730
- True.
252
00:09:58,733 --> 00:10:00,003
- It's about time you
moved up a notch or two.
253
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,730
Commission as well, obviously.
254
00:10:01,733 --> 00:10:03,033
What do you think?
255
00:10:03,033 --> 00:10:04,233
- Blimey.
256
00:10:04,233 --> 00:10:05,473
Definitely.
257
00:10:05,467 --> 00:10:06,697
I'd love that.
258
00:10:06,700 --> 00:10:07,630
- It's only fair.
259
00:10:07,633 --> 00:10:08,573
It's what everyone else gets.
260
00:10:08,567 --> 00:10:10,697
- That's brilliant, Fergus.
261
00:10:10,700 --> 00:10:11,970
Really, really brilliant.
262
00:10:12,933 --> 00:10:13,973
Thank you.
263
00:10:13,967 --> 00:10:14,897
- See?
264
00:10:14,900 --> 00:10:16,900
Anything's possible isn't it?
265
00:10:16,900 --> 00:10:18,530
- Suppose it is really.
266
00:10:18,533 --> 00:10:20,333
- If we can make all
this happen in here,
267
00:10:20,333 --> 00:10:22,673
get things really straight,
then I was thinking,
268
00:10:22,667 --> 00:10:24,727
once you and I are
back on good terms
269
00:10:24,733 --> 00:10:28,103
that maybe we could
sort out that visit.
270
00:10:28,100 --> 00:10:29,370
- What visit?
271
00:10:29,367 --> 00:10:31,227
- My visit, to see Joshua.
272
00:10:32,367 --> 00:10:34,427
- But Fergus, we've
discussed this.
273
00:10:34,433 --> 00:10:36,133
There is no visit.
274
00:10:37,833 --> 00:10:38,803
- But I thought we
just straightened
275
00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:40,300
everything out between us?
276
00:10:40,300 --> 00:10:41,700
- In here, yeah.
277
00:10:41,700 --> 00:10:43,270
In work.
278
00:10:43,267 --> 00:10:46,767
Flippin' eck, you've got
such a crap memory, you have.
279
00:10:46,767 --> 00:10:49,527
You're like a bloody elephant.
280
00:10:49,533 --> 00:10:51,833
Thanks for the promotion but
I need to get on now though,
281
00:10:51,833 --> 00:10:52,673
if you don't mind.
282
00:10:52,667 --> 00:10:53,927
I'm busy.
283
00:10:53,933 --> 00:10:55,403
I'll be at my desk
if you need me okay.
284
00:11:02,067 --> 00:11:03,597
- [Lisa] What a day.
285
00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:05,600
- Agony Aunty Lisa again?
286
00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:08,630
- Mother, keeper,
spiritual advisor.
287
00:11:08,633 --> 00:11:10,903
- You should let people
fend for themselves more.
288
00:11:10,900 --> 00:11:12,400
- Spot the mug, you mean.
289
00:11:12,400 --> 00:11:14,500
- Too kind, more like.
290
00:11:14,500 --> 00:11:16,070
Not spot the mug.
291
00:11:16,067 --> 00:11:18,267
Hey, you fancy a takeaway?
292
00:11:18,267 --> 00:11:19,697
You can tell me all about it.
293
00:11:19,700 --> 00:11:22,800
- The takeaway sounds
good but I might refrain
294
00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:24,900
from boring you to death
with the details of
295
00:11:24,900 --> 00:11:27,830
my mental friends'
lives, if you don't mind.
296
00:11:27,833 --> 00:11:29,533
(doorbell rings)
297
00:11:29,533 --> 00:11:31,103
- Who's that now?
298
00:11:31,100 --> 00:11:32,600
- Oh, shit, that'll be Kim.
299
00:11:32,600 --> 00:11:34,070
- Kim?
300
00:11:34,067 --> 00:11:36,797
- She rang before, her
husband's away on business.
301
00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:38,970
- And you said, "Don't worry,
love, come round to mine
302
00:11:38,967 --> 00:11:41,397
"and I'll massage
your feet for you."
303
00:11:41,400 --> 00:11:43,230
- What's up now?
304
00:11:43,233 --> 00:11:45,673
- Sometimes it's just
nice to come home
305
00:11:45,667 --> 00:11:47,367
to a bit of peace
with the missus.
306
00:11:47,367 --> 00:11:51,127
Y'know, no friends, no
visitors, no in-laws.
307
00:11:51,133 --> 00:11:53,533
- Are you having a go
at my mum and dad again?
308
00:11:53,533 --> 00:11:54,703
- What do you mean "again"?
309
00:11:54,700 --> 00:11:56,070
- This morning.
310
00:11:56,067 --> 00:11:57,727
Moaning cos me mum
used your laptop.
311
00:11:57,733 --> 00:11:59,503
- She never switches
it off properly.
312
00:11:59,500 --> 00:12:01,130
(doorbell rings)
313
00:12:01,133 --> 00:12:02,673
Are you going to get that?
314
00:12:02,667 --> 00:12:04,897
- Are you going to stop
being such a grump?
315
00:12:04,900 --> 00:12:08,070
- I just fancied a quiet
night in with you that's all.
316
00:12:08,067 --> 00:12:09,967
You wouldn't like it if you
wanted a quiet night in with me
317
00:12:09,967 --> 00:12:12,467
and I said I was off to the
pub or something would yeah?
318
00:12:12,467 --> 00:12:14,067
- But you're not
going to the pub.
319
00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:15,527
- You're missing my point.
320
00:12:15,533 --> 00:12:16,733
I could've gone for a pint.
321
00:12:16,733 --> 00:12:18,173
But I thought, no, I'll go home
322
00:12:18,167 --> 00:12:20,397
and see Lisa and we can
have a nice Chinese.
323
00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:22,370
- You're such a martyr.
324
00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:23,867
- You're such a mug.
325
00:12:23,867 --> 00:12:26,967
- I tell you what, why don't
you just go the pub then, eh?
326
00:12:26,967 --> 00:12:29,797
- Tell you what, I
might just do that.
327
00:12:29,800 --> 00:12:30,970
- You're not going, are you?
328
00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:32,197
- You just told me to.
329
00:12:32,200 --> 00:12:33,570
- Yeah, but I didn't
mean it, you dick.
330
00:12:33,567 --> 00:12:34,767
- Tough, too late.
331
00:12:39,833 --> 00:12:41,073
- Hello.
332
00:12:41,067 --> 00:12:42,627
- Hiya.
- Hi.
333
00:12:42,633 --> 00:12:46,073
- Right, see you later, then.
334
00:12:46,067 --> 00:12:48,827
- Yeah, have a lovely time.
- Awkward.
335
00:13:01,067 --> 00:13:04,267
- I've booked us in at Danilo's
tonight, for your birthday.
336
00:13:04,267 --> 00:13:05,667
All three of us.
337
00:13:05,667 --> 00:13:07,067
- Really?
338
00:13:07,067 --> 00:13:09,067
- And I've spoken to Vincent.
339
00:13:09,067 --> 00:13:10,897
There's another rehearsal
on tomorrow morning,
340
00:13:10,900 --> 00:13:12,370
so I'm going to go
to that one instead,
341
00:13:12,367 --> 00:13:14,527
so I can miss Sunday's
and come to your football,
342
00:13:14,533 --> 00:13:17,073
if you'd still like me to go?
343
00:13:17,067 --> 00:13:18,067
- Honest?
344
00:13:18,067 --> 00:13:18,827
- Yeah.
345
00:13:20,733 --> 00:13:22,073
- Top one, Dad thanks.
346
00:13:29,400 --> 00:13:31,130
What have you said?
347
00:13:31,133 --> 00:13:31,973
- Nothing.
348
00:13:35,100 --> 00:13:36,370
Honest nothing.
349
00:13:39,833 --> 00:13:42,273
- Just show me, it's
quite exciting, this.
350
00:13:42,267 --> 00:13:44,067
- But don't feel obliged
to pretend you like her
351
00:13:44,067 --> 00:13:45,467
just cos I don't
want paying for them.
352
00:13:45,467 --> 00:13:47,697
- Do I look like the
type that feels obliged?
353
00:13:50,333 --> 00:13:51,533
- Go on then, just look.
354
00:13:53,900 --> 00:13:56,070
- Rihanna?
355
00:13:56,067 --> 00:13:57,067
- You hate her.
356
00:13:57,067 --> 00:13:58,567
- I bloody love her, more like.
357
00:13:58,567 --> 00:13:59,397
- Really?
358
00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:00,430
- Completely.
359
00:14:00,433 --> 00:14:01,233
- That's so cool.
360
00:14:01,233 --> 00:14:02,573
Oh, that's great.
361
00:14:02,567 --> 00:14:04,097
We'll have such a
cool time together.
362
00:14:04,100 --> 00:14:06,200
- You've got to let me give
you some money towards them.
363
00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:07,070
- Perks of the job.
364
00:14:07,067 --> 00:14:08,367
- Are you sure?
365
00:14:08,367 --> 00:14:10,467
- They're free, they're
ours, it's sorted.
366
00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:15,400
(lively music)
367
00:14:41,067 --> 00:14:42,867
- Are you talking to me yet?
368
00:14:42,867 --> 00:14:44,227
- No.
369
00:14:44,233 --> 00:14:45,573
Where've you been?
370
00:14:45,567 --> 00:14:46,497
- Casino.
371
00:14:46,500 --> 00:14:47,900
Couple of massage parlors.
372
00:14:47,900 --> 00:14:50,470
Nailed a couple of ladyboys,
you know the score.
373
00:14:50,467 --> 00:14:51,627
- Dog'n'Dart then?
374
00:14:51,633 --> 00:14:52,433
- I thought you
weren't talking to me.
375
00:14:52,433 --> 00:14:54,073
- I'm not.
376
00:14:54,067 --> 00:14:55,767
- How's Greg?
- Fine.
377
00:14:55,767 --> 00:14:56,667
How's Kim?
378
00:14:56,667 --> 00:14:58,567
- Fine actually.
379
00:14:58,567 --> 00:14:59,767
- Good.
380
00:14:59,767 --> 00:15:00,867
- She's got a couple
of tickets to go
381
00:15:00,867 --> 00:15:02,967
and see Rihanna through work.
382
00:15:02,967 --> 00:15:03,897
- Lovely.
383
00:15:03,900 --> 00:15:05,900
- And she's taking me with her.
384
00:15:05,900 --> 00:15:07,130
- Very nice indeed.
385
00:15:07,133 --> 00:15:09,303
Are there no ends
to the wonderfulness
386
00:15:09,300 --> 00:15:11,900
of the almighty Kimtastic?
387
00:15:13,067 --> 00:15:15,897
I mean I'd have got us tickets
388
00:15:15,900 --> 00:15:18,070
if you wanted to go that badly.
389
00:15:18,067 --> 00:15:18,927
- You?
390
00:15:18,933 --> 00:15:19,903
Would you?
- Definitely.
391
00:15:20,900 --> 00:15:22,370
- Aw, bless.
392
00:15:22,367 --> 00:15:25,897
- A man is allowed, you
know, to want a nice evening
393
00:15:25,900 --> 00:15:28,530
with his wife if
she's had a shit day.
394
00:15:28,533 --> 00:15:30,103
To help her feel better.
395
00:15:30,100 --> 00:15:33,400
Chill out and drink some wine
396
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:35,500
and eat some nice food together.
397
00:15:35,500 --> 00:15:37,130
- But what that man
should never do,
398
00:15:37,133 --> 00:15:40,333
under any circumstances, is
just fuck off to the pub,
399
00:15:40,333 --> 00:15:43,773
only to prove a point, whilst
leaving his wife standing
400
00:15:43,767 --> 00:15:46,067
at the door looking
like a wet lettuce,
401
00:15:46,067 --> 00:15:47,827
not sure what to
say to her friend,
402
00:15:47,833 --> 00:15:49,973
who clearly knows
there's something wrong.
403
00:15:49,967 --> 00:15:52,567
- But if the wife keeps
fobbing the poor man off
404
00:15:52,567 --> 00:15:54,497
for that same friend,
405
00:15:54,500 --> 00:15:57,700
he is entitled to a
sulk in the garden shed,
406
00:15:57,700 --> 00:15:59,200
or a pint with his pals.
407
00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:03,600
And so we kind of come full
circle, if you think about it.
408
00:16:06,100 --> 00:16:07,600
No?
409
00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:12,330
- Is the man suggesting he is
jealous of the said friend?
410
00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:14,500
- Is he bollocks!
411
00:16:21,233 --> 00:16:22,133
- Knobhead.
412
00:16:23,067 --> 00:16:24,227
- Mug.
413
00:16:24,233 --> 00:16:25,873
- Is that French for sorry?
414
00:16:25,867 --> 00:16:27,397
- It might be.
415
00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:32,400
- Well, if it is, then maybe
the wife might ask the man
416
00:16:33,267 --> 00:16:35,527
if he fancies a roll in the hay?
417
00:16:36,433 --> 00:16:39,103
- When she's naked and slippy?
418
00:16:39,100 --> 00:16:40,700
- Correct.
419
00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:42,470
- It's French for
sorry, all right.
420
00:16:44,300 --> 00:16:46,900
(lively music)
421
00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:05,830
- Cheese and pickle
for you, Jim.
422
00:17:05,833 --> 00:17:07,173
Ham and salad cream
for everyone else.
423
00:17:07,167 --> 00:17:09,067
I've put some fruit
and some Kit Kats in.
424
00:17:09,067 --> 00:17:11,067
Jim, if you get hungry later on,
425
00:17:11,067 --> 00:17:13,597
grab yourself a hot dog
from the stand okay.
426
00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:15,530
- Okay, thanks, love.
427
00:17:15,533 --> 00:17:16,373
- Bye.
428
00:17:17,500 --> 00:17:18,700
- See you, Dad.
429
00:17:18,700 --> 00:17:20,700
- Have a wonderful time!
430
00:17:29,067 --> 00:17:29,827
Bye.
431
00:17:32,533 --> 00:17:35,103
(lively music)
432
00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:42,170
(dramatic music)
433
00:19:00,367 --> 00:19:03,167
- Maybe you should
cut the engine.
434
00:19:04,667 --> 00:19:05,497
Jim!
435
00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:06,500
Just cut it!
436
00:19:11,500 --> 00:19:13,930
(soft music)
437
00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:23,470
- When my granny died,
I went in to see her.
438
00:19:23,467 --> 00:19:26,727
They put her in this flimsy
old nightie, this pink thing.
439
00:19:26,733 --> 00:19:30,373
Oh, Lisa, it was horrible.
440
00:19:30,367 --> 00:19:34,167
There's me, standing over this
coffin, looking at my granny,
441
00:19:34,167 --> 00:19:37,797
all skinny and dead, and
the funeral man said,
442
00:19:37,800 --> 00:19:42,170
"Oh, she looks
lovely, doesn't she?
443
00:19:42,167 --> 00:19:44,397
"She looks like she's
about to go dancing."
444
00:19:46,067 --> 00:19:49,727
I looked up at him and I said,
"Don't be so fucking stupid.
445
00:19:49,733 --> 00:19:51,073
"She's dead.
446
00:19:51,067 --> 00:19:52,867
"Why would she be
going dancing?"
447
00:19:54,067 --> 00:19:55,697
And I don't even
use the F word, me.
448
00:19:55,700 --> 00:19:57,370
Do I, Lisa?
449
00:19:57,367 --> 00:19:58,697
- Never, love.
450
00:19:58,700 --> 00:20:01,270
She doesn't, honest.
451
00:20:01,267 --> 00:20:03,497
- Poor fella, he was
only trying to be nice.
452
00:20:03,500 --> 00:20:04,500
But I didn't want nice.
453
00:20:04,500 --> 00:20:05,970
Cos my granny was gone.
454
00:20:05,967 --> 00:20:08,697
What was the point in nice
when she wasn't here anymore?
455
00:20:08,700 --> 00:20:09,930
- I know, love.
456
00:20:09,933 --> 00:20:11,033
- They talk bollocks
a lot of the time,
457
00:20:11,033 --> 00:20:12,703
just to smooth it all over.
458
00:20:15,867 --> 00:20:17,367
Sorry.
459
00:20:17,367 --> 00:20:19,497
- I don't want any of that
nonsense for Jim either.
460
00:20:19,500 --> 00:20:21,430
I don't want nice.
461
00:20:21,433 --> 00:20:23,703
None of it can be
nice, Lisa, none of it.
462
00:20:23,700 --> 00:20:26,030
You do know what
I mean, don't you?
463
00:20:26,033 --> 00:20:27,403
- Course I do, love.
464
00:20:28,733 --> 00:20:30,433
- He took me out
for my birthday.
465
00:20:30,433 --> 00:20:32,603
He told Gary he's going
to watch him play.
466
00:20:34,133 --> 00:20:35,833
Everything was fine.
467
00:20:35,833 --> 00:20:38,233
Everything was perfect.
468
00:20:38,233 --> 00:20:41,103
(melancholy music)
469
00:20:52,233 --> 00:20:53,973
- Do you think I should
pop these in now?
470
00:20:53,967 --> 00:20:55,667
They'll only take 15 minutes.
471
00:20:55,667 --> 00:20:57,897
- He'll be here
any second, though.
472
00:20:57,900 --> 00:20:59,500
- But we don't want
to be fiddling about
with sausage rolls
473
00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:01,770
once everyone comes back here.
474
00:21:01,767 --> 00:21:03,297
- I don't mind.
475
00:21:03,300 --> 00:21:06,100
- I'll fiddle with stuff when
we get back, don't you worry.
476
00:21:06,100 --> 00:21:07,570
- But if we do them now,
477
00:21:07,567 --> 00:21:09,697
it gives them a chance
to cool down, won't they?
478
00:21:09,700 --> 00:21:12,530
And no one wants hot
sausage rolls, do they?
479
00:21:12,533 --> 00:21:14,273
They'll all end up scalded.
480
00:21:14,267 --> 00:21:15,597
- She's got a point.
481
00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:16,800
- Stay out of this, Dad.
482
00:21:18,067 --> 00:21:19,297
- She has got a point though.
483
00:21:19,300 --> 00:21:20,930
- And you stay
out of it an' all.
484
00:21:22,433 --> 00:21:23,733
- I don't mind.
485
00:21:23,733 --> 00:21:25,433
I can stick them in
when we get back.
486
00:21:25,433 --> 00:21:26,803
It's fine.
487
00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:28,600
- You've got enough on
your plate today, love,
488
00:21:28,600 --> 00:21:30,670
without worrying
about sausage rolls.
489
00:21:30,667 --> 00:21:31,727
- [Both] She's right.
490
00:21:37,967 --> 00:21:40,567
- I just don't think
sausage rolls that give you
491
00:21:40,567 --> 00:21:44,397
90-degree tongue burns are
much of a good idea that's all.
492
00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:48,130
- Mother, please, just
leave it, will you?
493
00:21:48,133 --> 00:21:49,873
He'll be here any minute.
494
00:21:49,867 --> 00:21:51,297
We don't want Jim turning up
495
00:21:51,300 --> 00:21:53,370
and we're all at loggerheads
about sausage rolls.
496
00:21:53,367 --> 00:21:54,927
It won't look very
good, will it?
497
00:21:54,933 --> 00:21:55,973
- [Both] She's right.
498
00:22:02,167 --> 00:22:03,067
- Bianca?
499
00:22:04,867 --> 00:22:05,697
He's here.
500
00:22:17,267 --> 00:22:20,267
- I just want to thank you
all for being here with me.
501
00:22:21,467 --> 00:22:23,697
You'll never know how
much this means to me.
502
00:22:24,633 --> 00:22:25,573
And to Jim.
503
00:22:27,067 --> 00:22:29,727
He'll be very proud, I promise.
504
00:22:33,633 --> 00:22:36,533
(melancholy music)
505
00:23:17,567 --> 00:23:21,067
(haunting bagpipe music)
506
00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:43,270
- Oh look who it is.
507
00:23:44,633 --> 00:23:46,633
- Who's that?
- It's Roger.
508
00:23:46,633 --> 00:23:49,733
- Three times regional
singles champ.
509
00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:55,500
- A skating priest?
510
00:23:55,500 --> 00:23:57,070
- He's sublime.
511
00:23:57,067 --> 00:23:58,597
- Can you lot shut up?
512
00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:00,570
This is a church and
we're at a funeral.
513
00:24:00,567 --> 00:24:02,667
You're not supposed
to be talking.
514
00:24:02,667 --> 00:24:07,667
Where's your respect?
515
00:24:09,167 --> 00:24:10,897
- This is a church and
we're at a funeral.
516
00:24:10,900 --> 00:24:12,670
Where's your respect?
517
00:24:13,700 --> 00:24:14,930
Who the hell is it?
518
00:24:14,933 --> 00:24:16,303
- You're not supposed
to say hell in here.
519
00:24:16,300 --> 00:24:17,970
- It's just Kim.
520
00:24:17,967 --> 00:24:19,927
- What does she want now?
521
00:24:19,933 --> 00:24:21,633
- Don't be so bloody nosey.
522
00:24:23,067 --> 00:24:25,197
- Not sure you're allowed
to say bloody either.
523
00:24:26,467 --> 00:24:27,797
- My dad does that.
524
00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:28,830
- Does what?
525
00:24:28,833 --> 00:24:30,403
- Swears in church.
526
00:24:30,400 --> 00:24:33,730
He said the F word
once in York Minster.
527
00:24:33,733 --> 00:24:34,833
- That's terrible.
528
00:24:35,700 --> 00:24:37,230
- I wouldn't worry about it.
529
00:24:37,233 --> 00:24:39,833
I said the C word once at
the Taj Mahal in Rusholme.
530
00:24:40,700 --> 00:24:41,700
- All right, mother.
531
00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:50,430
- Good afternoon, everyone.
532
00:24:51,833 --> 00:24:55,333
I'd like to thank you all
for coming here today.
533
00:24:55,333 --> 00:24:58,073
Jim would have been so proud
534
00:24:58,067 --> 00:25:02,897
and happy to see all
these lovely faces.
535
00:25:09,767 --> 00:25:10,597
- It's Jack.
536
00:25:17,200 --> 00:25:18,900
- What the hell's he doing here?
537
00:25:18,900 --> 00:25:20,700
- How the hell am
I supposed to know?
538
00:25:20,700 --> 00:25:22,070
- Right, you two that's enough.
539
00:25:22,067 --> 00:25:23,397
I'm warning you.
540
00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:25,300
- Right, so, we're
going to start
541
00:25:25,300 --> 00:25:28,070
the service with a hymn today.
542
00:25:28,067 --> 00:25:30,967
So if you could all
please turn to page three
543
00:25:30,967 --> 00:25:32,897
of the order of service.
544
00:25:34,967 --> 00:25:37,467
(organ music)
545
00:25:53,967 --> 00:25:54,867
- No.
546
00:25:54,867 --> 00:25:56,197
- I'll have one.
547
00:25:57,967 --> 00:25:59,167
- Shell?
- I'm all right.
548
00:25:59,167 --> 00:26:00,767
- I mean, don't get me wrong,
549
00:26:00,767 --> 00:26:04,127
it was a lovely service but
it's all this nonsense about
550
00:26:04,133 --> 00:26:06,273
Jim being in the next
room that I struggle with.
551
00:26:06,267 --> 00:26:08,267
- But people get comfort
from all that, Mum.
552
00:26:08,267 --> 00:26:10,767
- Oh, God, it gives me
the willies, all that.
553
00:26:10,767 --> 00:26:13,067
What if he is in
the next room, eh?
554
00:26:13,067 --> 00:26:15,227
Would you be scared if he was?
555
00:26:15,233 --> 00:26:17,533
- I don't think Jim was the
scary sort when he was with us,
556
00:26:17,533 --> 00:26:19,133
never mind now he's not.
557
00:26:19,133 --> 00:26:21,403
- Look, he's not
in the next room.
558
00:26:21,400 --> 00:26:22,830
He's dead.
559
00:26:22,833 --> 00:26:25,433
- Sue's in the next room
making beef paste sandwiches.
560
00:26:25,433 --> 00:26:26,503
Simple.
561
00:26:26,500 --> 00:26:27,930
I'm a realist, me.
562
00:26:27,933 --> 00:26:29,633
- Do you not mean atheist?
563
00:26:29,633 --> 00:26:31,073
- No, I mean realist.
564
00:26:31,067 --> 00:26:32,327
When you're gone, you're gone.
565
00:26:32,333 --> 00:26:33,833
God or no God.
566
00:26:33,833 --> 00:26:36,303
I've told Dan I want him to
stick me in an orange box
567
00:26:36,300 --> 00:26:38,330
and bung me in the
canal when I'm gone.
568
00:26:38,333 --> 00:26:40,133
None of this funeral nonsense.
569
00:26:40,133 --> 00:26:41,673
I mean, what's the
point of having
570
00:26:41,667 --> 00:26:43,297
a piss-up if you can't even go?
571
00:26:45,333 --> 00:26:46,173
- Another?
572
00:26:46,167 --> 00:26:47,197
- Another, yeah, go on.
573
00:26:48,133 --> 00:26:49,203
- How are you, Roger?
574
00:26:51,067 --> 00:26:52,597
- Well, I've been better.
575
00:26:52,600 --> 00:26:54,070
You know, it's not exactly
the best part of the job,
576
00:26:54,067 --> 00:26:55,697
if I'm honest.
577
00:26:55,700 --> 00:26:57,330
- [Sue] Beautiful service.
578
00:26:57,333 --> 00:26:58,173
- Well, thank you.
579
00:26:58,167 --> 00:26:59,797
- Terrible business, eh?
580
00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:01,370
- Inevitable, though, Sue.
581
00:27:01,367 --> 00:27:03,897
For all of us, one day.
582
00:27:03,900 --> 00:27:06,270
Jim was just slightly
further up that ladder
583
00:27:06,267 --> 00:27:09,067
than we might've
expected, I suppose.
584
00:27:09,067 --> 00:27:10,527
- Yes.
585
00:27:10,533 --> 00:27:13,433
- You know, when your
number's up and all that.
586
00:27:13,433 --> 00:27:14,973
- When you put it like that,
587
00:27:14,967 --> 00:27:17,397
it makes me wonder
how long I've got!
588
00:27:17,400 --> 00:27:20,070
- Don't be so silly.
589
00:27:20,067 --> 00:27:23,067
You're going nowhere.
590
00:27:23,067 --> 00:27:24,197
- [Dan] Fancy a whisky?
591
00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:25,670
- Oh, er, yes.
592
00:27:25,667 --> 00:27:27,497
I would be churlish
not to, I suppose.
593
00:27:28,767 --> 00:27:31,797
So, I hear congratulations
are in order.
594
00:27:31,800 --> 00:27:34,300
- Yes.
- You must be delighted.
595
00:27:34,300 --> 00:27:35,700
- Oh, we are.
596
00:27:35,700 --> 00:27:37,970
- You'll be swapping
regions, surely, though,
597
00:27:37,967 --> 00:27:39,497
when they knock it down?
598
00:27:39,500 --> 00:27:40,600
- Knock what down?
599
00:27:41,667 --> 00:27:42,497
- The rink.
600
00:27:44,567 --> 00:27:47,397
Oh, you don't know, do you?
601
00:27:47,400 --> 00:27:51,500
I'm sorry, I just
assumed that you knew.
602
00:27:51,500 --> 00:27:53,400
- Sorry, Roger, don't know what?
603
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:55,070
- They're demolishing it.
604
00:27:55,067 --> 00:27:56,827
They've sold out to Cramwell's.
605
00:27:58,067 --> 00:27:59,267
They're building a
load of new houses.
606
00:27:59,267 --> 00:28:00,697
If that's what
you can call them.
607
00:28:00,700 --> 00:28:02,470
Size of beach
huts, most of them.
608
00:28:02,467 --> 00:28:04,597
Still, you get to pick
your own fireplace
609
00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:06,730
though so I suppose
that's quite classy.
610
00:28:11,800 --> 00:28:13,600
Barry doesn't know
either, does he?
611
00:28:13,600 --> 00:28:14,730
- No.
612
00:28:14,733 --> 00:28:16,333
He'll go ape.
613
00:28:16,333 --> 00:28:17,173
- Apeshit?
614
00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:19,230
- Yes, Roger.
615
00:28:19,233 --> 00:28:20,133
Apeshit.
616
00:28:20,133 --> 00:28:20,973
Sorry.
617
00:28:21,867 --> 00:28:23,697
- Thank you very much.
618
00:28:23,700 --> 00:28:26,630
Hey look, I'm easy.
619
00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:36,070
Oh, God.
620
00:28:45,867 --> 00:28:46,927
- Hiya, Lisa.
621
00:28:46,933 --> 00:28:48,533
Dan.
622
00:28:48,533 --> 00:28:50,073
- Hi, Jack.
623
00:28:50,067 --> 00:28:50,927
- How are you both?
624
00:28:50,933 --> 00:28:52,073
- We're good.
625
00:28:52,067 --> 00:28:53,497
- Yeah, smashing, thanks.
626
00:29:02,567 --> 00:29:04,627
- I'm Jack.
627
00:29:04,633 --> 00:29:07,633
- Hi I'm Gary, Jim's son.
628
00:29:07,633 --> 00:29:09,103
- Oh, hello.
629
00:29:09,100 --> 00:29:10,300
I used to live across the road.
630
00:29:10,300 --> 00:29:12,630
He was a good
fella, your old man.
631
00:29:14,067 --> 00:29:14,897
- Thanks.
632
00:29:19,867 --> 00:29:21,827
- I hope it can be
cool between us.
633
00:29:21,833 --> 00:29:22,833
- No reason why not.
634
00:29:24,067 --> 00:29:25,527
You're entitled to be
here like everyone else.
635
00:29:25,533 --> 00:29:29,973
Just don't expect me
to get the banners out.
636
00:29:29,967 --> 00:29:31,427
All right?
637
00:29:32,833 --> 00:29:35,733
(melancholy music)
638
00:29:50,167 --> 00:29:52,067
- Are you all right, chick?
639
00:29:52,067 --> 00:29:54,497
- I'm running out
of things to say.
640
00:29:54,500 --> 00:29:57,070
If I hear one more person say,
641
00:29:57,067 --> 00:29:59,667
"It's what Jim would've wanted,"
642
00:29:59,667 --> 00:30:01,527
I think I might explode.
643
00:30:03,233 --> 00:30:05,033
- Do you want me
to leave you alone?
644
00:30:07,367 --> 00:30:08,567
- Not really.
645
00:30:10,567 --> 00:30:12,567
- Come on back in and
have a brandy, eh?
646
00:30:14,333 --> 00:30:16,173
- Do you know what
I really fancy?
647
00:30:16,167 --> 00:30:17,597
- What?
648
00:30:17,600 --> 00:30:19,030
- A margarita.
649
00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:21,830
He makes me one
on a Monday night
650
00:30:21,833 --> 00:30:23,803
whilst I'm watching Coach Trip.
651
00:30:24,900 --> 00:30:26,830
But I'll look
terrible if I wander
652
00:30:26,833 --> 00:30:29,433
about in there drinking
cocktails, won't I?
653
00:30:30,900 --> 00:30:32,970
So many bloody rules about
what you're supposed to do
654
00:30:32,967 --> 00:30:37,967
and not supposed to do and
all I want to do is scream.
655
00:30:38,867 --> 00:30:40,097
- You scream if you want to.
656
00:30:40,100 --> 00:30:41,470
I won't tell anyone.
657
00:30:42,700 --> 00:30:45,600
- To be honest, Sue,
I've had enough now.
658
00:30:46,767 --> 00:30:49,897
- Come on, I'll make
you a sneaky margarita.
659
00:30:49,900 --> 00:30:51,470
What do you reckon?
660
00:30:53,867 --> 00:30:56,727
(melancholy music)
661
00:31:00,500 --> 00:31:02,100
- Where's your ex gone?
662
00:31:02,100 --> 00:31:03,070
- I don't know.
663
00:31:03,067 --> 00:31:05,367
He's my ex, why should I?
664
00:31:05,367 --> 00:31:06,797
- Oh, right, I get it.
665
00:31:06,800 --> 00:31:07,830
It's awkward, is it?
666
00:31:07,833 --> 00:31:08,873
- Not really.
667
00:31:08,867 --> 00:31:09,967
We're adults.
668
00:31:09,967 --> 00:31:11,527
- What's that got to do with it?
669
00:31:11,533 --> 00:31:13,233
If you still love them,
it's gonna be awkward.
670
00:31:13,233 --> 00:31:14,803
- I don't still love him.
671
00:31:14,800 --> 00:31:16,530
- Anyone else on the horizon?
672
00:31:17,800 --> 00:31:18,900
- No.
673
00:31:18,900 --> 00:31:20,930
- Are you looking?
- Yeah.
674
00:31:20,933 --> 00:31:21,773
Kind of.
675
00:31:21,767 --> 00:31:23,067
- No joy?
676
00:31:23,067 --> 00:31:24,827
- Not really.
677
00:31:24,833 --> 00:31:25,903
- You still love him.
678
00:31:27,167 --> 00:31:28,097
- It's weird.
679
00:31:29,567 --> 00:31:32,227
I seem to be spending every
waking moment looking round
680
00:31:32,233 --> 00:31:34,803
corners wondering if the
next person that I bump into
681
00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:37,630
is going to be the one
that might be next in line.
682
00:31:37,633 --> 00:31:39,503
- Story of my life, kid.
683
00:31:39,500 --> 00:31:41,870
None of us can be sure
what the future holds.
684
00:31:42,767 --> 00:31:44,697
- Jim certainly wasn't.
685
00:31:44,700 --> 00:31:46,830
- But, don't repeat this.
686
00:31:46,833 --> 00:31:50,103
But some of us have got
a knack of taking a look.
687
00:31:51,933 --> 00:31:52,733
- At what?
688
00:31:53,700 --> 00:31:56,070
- At what's around that corner.
689
00:31:56,067 --> 00:31:56,827
- What?!
690
00:32:00,100 --> 00:32:00,870
- Hello, Shelley.
691
00:32:02,100 --> 00:32:04,530
- Jack, hiya, how are you?
692
00:32:04,533 --> 00:32:05,773
- Great, thanks.
693
00:32:05,767 --> 00:32:07,397
- Meet me in the
bathroom in five.
694
00:32:09,200 --> 00:32:11,570
- Listen, I know it's not the
695
00:32:11,567 --> 00:32:12,967
best time to be
talking business,
696
00:32:12,967 --> 00:32:15,897
but I saw the ad for
the finance consultant.
697
00:32:15,900 --> 00:32:17,630
- Oh, right, yeah.
698
00:32:17,633 --> 00:32:19,903
- And I was wondering
if you would mind
699
00:32:19,900 --> 00:32:22,300
passing my card on to Fergus.
700
00:32:22,300 --> 00:32:23,470
- I thought you'd
moved back to Ireland?
701
00:32:23,467 --> 00:32:24,927
- [Jack] I did.
702
00:32:24,933 --> 00:32:26,773
- To be honest, Jack, I
think he wants someone who's
703
00:32:26,767 --> 00:32:28,427
gonna be on it for at least
a couple of days a week.
704
00:32:28,433 --> 00:32:29,933
- But I'm back here now.
705
00:32:29,933 --> 00:32:31,373
- Back over the road?
706
00:32:31,367 --> 00:32:32,567
- No, no.
707
00:32:32,567 --> 00:32:34,097
Can't sell it so
I'm renting it out.
708
00:32:34,100 --> 00:32:36,370
I've got myself a nice little
pad in town for a few months.
709
00:32:36,367 --> 00:32:37,527
- Right, very nice.
710
00:32:37,533 --> 00:32:39,073
- So you don't
mind passing it on?
711
00:32:39,067 --> 00:32:40,427
- Yeah, yeah, no, that's fine.
712
00:32:40,433 --> 00:32:41,373
- Thanks.
713
00:32:41,367 --> 00:32:42,867
- Sorry, will you excuse me?
714
00:32:42,867 --> 00:32:45,067
I just need to pop to the
loo, if you don't mind.
715
00:32:45,067 --> 00:32:46,167
- Not at all.
716
00:32:47,867 --> 00:32:50,797
(melancholy music)
717
00:33:01,433 --> 00:33:04,073
- I'd like everyone to go now.
718
00:33:04,933 --> 00:33:06,073
No offense.
719
00:33:06,933 --> 00:33:08,303
Is that terrible?
720
00:33:08,300 --> 00:33:10,100
- You've had enough, love.
721
00:33:10,100 --> 00:33:11,600
I'd say that's normal.
722
00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:13,270
- They'd stay all
night, some people,
723
00:33:13,267 --> 00:33:15,527
chance of a bit of
grub and a whisky.
724
00:33:15,533 --> 00:33:16,973
I'll get rid.
725
00:33:16,967 --> 00:33:17,797
Leave it to me.
726
00:33:21,867 --> 00:33:23,697
Okay, time to go now.
727
00:33:30,900 --> 00:33:33,200
- They're saying
your heart is heavy.
728
00:33:33,200 --> 00:33:34,070
- Who is?
729
00:33:34,067 --> 00:33:35,727
- The cards.
730
00:33:35,733 --> 00:33:38,373
They're saying your
heart will lift.
731
00:33:40,100 --> 00:33:42,600
That's definitely got
something to do with a fella.
732
00:33:42,600 --> 00:33:43,830
- Which fella?
733
00:33:43,833 --> 00:33:46,073
- Well, they're not
normally that specific
734
00:33:46,067 --> 00:33:47,067
but that Jack couldn't keep his
735
00:33:47,067 --> 00:33:48,697
eyes off your tits just then.
736
00:33:48,700 --> 00:33:49,530
- Jack?!
737
00:33:50,433 --> 00:33:51,273
No.
738
00:33:52,200 --> 00:33:53,200
No, no, they've got that wrong.
739
00:33:53,200 --> 00:33:54,700
Is it not Greg?
740
00:33:54,700 --> 00:33:57,170
Isn't Greg in there somewhere?
741
00:33:57,167 --> 00:33:59,897
- I'm not seeing a Greg
just at the moment, no.
742
00:34:01,467 --> 00:34:03,967
This could possibly be a Greg.
743
00:34:03,967 --> 00:34:05,397
- Really?
744
00:34:05,400 --> 00:34:06,830
- It's definitely a person.
745
00:34:06,833 --> 00:34:08,473
- Is it male or female?
746
00:34:17,133 --> 00:34:18,533
Is there a name?
747
00:34:22,933 --> 00:34:24,433
- Close your eyes!
748
00:34:27,300 --> 00:34:29,300
- [Lisa] Hurry up in there.
749
00:34:29,300 --> 00:34:30,700
Bianca wants everyone to go.
750
00:34:32,067 --> 00:34:33,067
- Christ on a bike!
751
00:34:33,067 --> 00:34:35,297
She tried to kill me!
752
00:34:35,300 --> 00:34:37,530
Kicking out time already.
753
00:34:37,533 --> 00:34:39,673
Hey, fancy a nightcap at mine?
754
00:34:44,633 --> 00:34:46,573
- [Lisa] Maybe I
should go back over.
755
00:34:46,567 --> 00:34:48,197
- She said she wanted quiet.
756
00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:49,630
- But it doesn't feel right.
757
00:34:49,633 --> 00:34:51,103
I know there's
something not right.
758
00:34:51,100 --> 00:34:52,830
- She's just lost
her husband, flower.
759
00:34:52,833 --> 00:34:54,673
Of course something's not right.
760
00:34:54,667 --> 00:34:57,397
- There's something I
need to tell everyone.
761
00:34:57,400 --> 00:34:59,070
- Sue, love?
762
00:34:59,067 --> 00:35:01,627
- Well, more you, really, love.
763
00:35:01,633 --> 00:35:03,103
I need to tell you.
764
00:35:03,100 --> 00:35:03,900
- What, love?
765
00:35:03,900 --> 00:35:04,730
What's up?
766
00:35:04,733 --> 00:35:05,573
- What's the matter?
767
00:35:05,567 --> 00:35:06,397
What is it?
768
00:35:06,400 --> 00:35:07,700
- It's okay, treasure.
769
00:35:07,700 --> 00:35:11,470
Barry, they're knocking
the ice rink down.
770
00:35:13,100 --> 00:35:15,070
- Oh, thank fuck for that!
771
00:35:15,067 --> 00:35:16,197
- Dan!
772
00:35:16,200 --> 00:35:17,130
- I thought she was
going to tell us
773
00:35:17,133 --> 00:35:18,633
she was pregnant or something.
774
00:35:18,633 --> 00:35:20,773
- Get in here now, knobhead!
775
00:35:31,200 --> 00:35:32,470
- It's all right.
776
00:35:32,467 --> 00:35:33,297
It's okay.
777
00:35:36,333 --> 00:35:37,173
Right.
778
00:35:37,167 --> 00:35:38,927
Fancy a Baileys?
779
00:35:38,933 --> 00:35:40,533
- Yeah, go on then.
780
00:35:44,633 --> 00:35:46,633
- Sit down.
- Yeah.
781
00:35:46,633 --> 00:35:49,073
(soft music)
782
00:36:11,433 --> 00:36:13,933
(phone rings)
783
00:36:20,333 --> 00:36:23,073
- [Jim] Hello, this is
Jim and Bianca's house.
784
00:36:23,067 --> 00:36:24,267
If you'd like to
leave a message,
785
00:36:24,267 --> 00:36:26,097
we'll get back to
you whenever we can.
786
00:36:31,800 --> 00:36:34,430
(knock at door)
787
00:36:34,433 --> 00:36:36,103
- Who the frig's that?
788
00:36:36,100 --> 00:36:37,070
- You're the one with the cards.
789
00:36:37,067 --> 00:36:38,897
Why don't you ask them?
790
00:36:41,767 --> 00:36:43,697
Are you not going to answer it?
791
00:36:43,700 --> 00:36:45,430
- Am I buggery!
792
00:36:45,433 --> 00:36:50,333
Tell no-one and say nowt, but
I've got in a bit of bother.
793
00:36:50,333 --> 00:36:51,673
- Oh, no.
794
00:36:51,667 --> 00:36:53,167
- Council tax.
795
00:36:53,167 --> 00:36:56,767
Nothing I can't handle,
but he is very persistent.
796
00:36:58,700 --> 00:36:59,530
Bailiff.
797
00:37:00,633 --> 00:37:01,503
- At this time?!
798
00:37:01,500 --> 00:37:02,300
- I know.
799
00:37:02,300 --> 00:37:03,330
New tactics.
800
00:37:03,333 --> 00:37:04,303
Bastards!
801
00:37:07,700 --> 00:37:09,070
- What will they do?
802
00:37:09,067 --> 00:37:09,867
- No idea.
803
00:37:11,533 --> 00:37:14,203
But I'm not hanging around
here waiting to find out.
804
00:37:14,200 --> 00:37:15,600
Come on.
805
00:37:15,600 --> 00:37:18,530
(mysterious music)
806
00:37:31,533 --> 00:37:34,073
(phone rings)
807
00:37:42,300 --> 00:37:43,100
- Bianca?
808
00:37:46,067 --> 00:37:46,797
Bianca?
809
00:37:48,500 --> 00:37:49,670
- I mean, bloody houses.
810
00:37:49,667 --> 00:37:51,797
Why do we need
more bloody houses?
811
00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:53,130
Isn't there enough space in all
812
00:37:53,133 --> 00:37:54,633
those fields to
build more houses?
813
00:37:54,633 --> 00:37:57,533
- They don't want fields,
they want town centers.
814
00:37:57,533 --> 00:37:58,373
Amenities.
815
00:37:58,367 --> 00:37:59,667
- At what cost though?
816
00:37:59,667 --> 00:38:01,597
25 years we've skated there.
817
00:38:01,600 --> 00:38:03,070
- Put your shoes on,
love, and let's go home.
818
00:38:03,067 --> 00:38:05,267
We can start the
revolution in the morning.
819
00:38:05,267 --> 00:38:06,697
I'm exhausted.
820
00:38:06,700 --> 00:38:07,830
(doorbell rings)
821
00:38:07,833 --> 00:38:08,933
You stay there, chick.
822
00:38:08,933 --> 00:38:09,773
I'll go.
823
00:38:15,100 --> 00:38:16,070
Oh.
- Hiya.
824
00:38:19,167 --> 00:38:20,067
Hiya.
825
00:38:21,167 --> 00:38:22,897
- All right, Mum?
- Hiya, Shelley.
826
00:38:22,900 --> 00:38:24,430
- Is everything okay?
827
00:38:24,433 --> 00:38:26,503
- Barry, shoes.
828
00:38:26,500 --> 00:38:29,300
- I thought she'd be safer here.
829
00:38:29,300 --> 00:38:30,730
- Safer?
830
00:38:30,733 --> 00:38:32,933
- She's got the heavies
on her case, hasn't she?
831
00:38:32,933 --> 00:38:34,203
Did you not know?
832
00:38:34,200 --> 00:38:35,570
- What?
833
00:38:35,567 --> 00:38:37,067
- Barry, keys.
834
00:38:37,067 --> 00:38:38,567
- Wasn't it a
lovely service, Sue?
835
00:38:38,567 --> 00:38:40,827
- Delightful.
- Night, all.
836
00:38:40,833 --> 00:38:41,803
- Ta ra.
837
00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:42,970
- Yeah, see ya.
- See ya, Dad.
838
00:38:42,967 --> 00:38:44,297
- I hope they haven't
gone cos of us.
839
00:38:44,300 --> 00:38:46,500
- Have you been dodging
your council tax again?
840
00:38:46,500 --> 00:38:48,670
- I thought I told you
to keep your trap shut.
841
00:38:48,667 --> 00:38:49,867
- She better not have been.
842
00:38:49,867 --> 00:38:51,067
- Pauline, people care.
843
00:38:51,067 --> 00:38:53,067
Especially your family.
844
00:38:53,067 --> 00:38:55,727
- I'll bloody throttle
you if you have, Pauline.
845
00:38:55,733 --> 00:38:57,073
- [Dan] Have you, Mum?
846
00:38:58,533 --> 00:39:01,073
(phone rings)
847
00:39:02,200 --> 00:39:04,400
- [Jim] Hello, this is
Jim and Bianca's house.
848
00:39:04,400 --> 00:39:05,630
If you'd like to leave a message
849
00:39:05,633 --> 00:39:07,533
we'll get back to
you whenever we can.
850
00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:16,100
(phone rings)
851
00:39:21,800 --> 00:39:24,700
Hello, this is Jim
and Bianca's house,
852
00:39:24,700 --> 00:39:27,200
if you'd like to leave a
message we'll get back to you.
853
00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:30,070
- What am I going
to do without him?
854
00:39:32,767 --> 00:39:35,667
(melancholy music)
855
00:39:45,100 --> 00:39:47,470
- Look, they can't force
themselves in, son.
856
00:39:47,467 --> 00:39:49,067
It's not allowed.
857
00:39:49,067 --> 00:39:50,897
- Oh, so you spend
the rest of the year
858
00:39:50,900 --> 00:39:52,600
hiding under the kitchen table?
859
00:39:52,600 --> 00:39:53,430
- No.
860
00:39:55,967 --> 00:39:57,567
- Charlie!
861
00:39:57,567 --> 00:39:58,667
- All right, gorgeous?
862
00:40:03,100 --> 00:40:03,930
- Charlie?
863
00:40:05,000 --> 00:40:06,900
- I've been knocking
on at yours.
864
00:40:06,900 --> 00:40:08,200
Thought you'd be here.
865
00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:09,800
Looking good, old bird.
866
00:40:15,100 --> 00:40:15,930
Hello, son.
867
00:40:17,567 --> 00:40:19,297
- All right, Dad.
868
00:40:19,300 --> 00:40:22,430
- How about a hug for
your old fella, eh?
869
00:40:30,333 --> 00:40:34,003
* But time keeps
creeping on me *
870
00:40:34,000 --> 00:40:38,870
* Yeah it's slipping away
871
00:40:38,867 --> 00:40:41,867
* Gotta keep up the pace
872
00:40:41,867 --> 00:40:45,727
* Stop and stand if you like
873
00:40:45,733 --> 00:40:47,373
* I don't care
874
00:40:47,367 --> 00:40:52,327
* Just got to keep on
doing things my own way *
875
00:40:54,367 --> 00:40:56,927
(upbeat music)
876
00:41:00,900 --> 00:41:02,400
We'd did a runner.
877
00:41:04,867 --> 00:41:08,197
(unintelligible voices)
878
00:41:17,100 --> 00:41:19,670
(upbeat music)
59361
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