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1
00:00:10,511 --> 00:00:13,222
Happy Halloween, everyone!
Oh, that's great.
2
00:00:13,305 --> 00:00:15,557
Hey. Happy Halloween.
3
00:00:16,475 --> 00:00:17,851
Jan called.
4
00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:20,521
Okay.
5
00:00:21,605 --> 00:00:24,733
I know why she's calling.
6
00:00:25,275 --> 00:00:26,443
It's the end of the month,
7
00:00:26,527 --> 00:00:30,322
and I was supposed to let
somebody go by the end of the month.
8
00:00:31,532 --> 00:00:34,952
And somehow I'm supposed
to put on a costume and smile.
9
00:00:36,620 --> 00:00:38,497
Okay.
Sherry: Jan Levinson's office.
10
00:00:38,580 --> 00:00:40,916
Hey, Sherry,
Michael Scott returning.
11
00:00:40,999 --> 00:00:42,584
Oh, she's in a meeting.
12
00:00:42,668 --> 00:00:45,337
She just wanted the name
of the employee you let go.
13
00:00:45,420 --> 00:00:47,220
Well, I'm gonna wait
until the end of the day,
14
00:00:47,297 --> 00:00:49,817
because the book said it's best
to wait until the end of the day.
15
00:00:49,841 --> 00:00:52,094
I just need the name of
who you're planning to let go.
16
00:00:52,177 --> 00:00:56,598
I don't know yet.
I will have to call her back.
17
00:00:57,849 --> 00:00:59,977
I know she wanted the name.
18
00:01:00,352 --> 00:01:02,437
Okay, Sherry? Yeah.
19
00:01:02,771 --> 00:01:06,858
If you were getting fired,
how would you wanna be told
20
00:01:06,942 --> 00:01:10,821
so that you could still be
friends with the person firing you?
21
00:01:12,030 --> 00:01:14,283
Jan wants the name
as soon as possible, Michael.
22
00:01:14,366 --> 00:01:16,702
Thanks. I'll call her back.
23
00:01:18,620 --> 00:01:20,747
I wish I could fire Sherry.
24
00:01:21,707 --> 00:01:23,917
Hey, I'm still here.
Okay. I'm sorry.
25
00:01:24,001 --> 00:01:25,168
Yeah.
26
00:01:25,252 --> 00:01:26,420
Okay.
27
00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:28,005
Hanging up now.
28
00:02:04,666 --> 00:02:08,295
I mean, you hear
about layoffs in the news,
29
00:02:08,378 --> 00:02:12,758
but when you actually have to
do it yourself, it is heavy stuff. It's...
30
00:02:13,342 --> 00:02:16,303
I mean, these are people's
lives you're talking about.
31
00:02:16,720 --> 00:02:18,513
You wanted me? Yes.
32
00:02:25,729 --> 00:02:28,732
Papier-maché? Yes. Yes.
33
00:02:31,610 --> 00:02:34,196
Pam, I have to let
somebody go today.
34
00:02:35,030 --> 00:02:37,616
This is the hardest thing
I've ever had to do.
35
00:02:37,699 --> 00:02:39,576
Why did you put it off
until Halloween?
36
00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:42,120
Because it's very scary stuff.
37
00:02:42,329 --> 00:02:44,581
I think it's gonna put a
damper on the party a little.
38
00:02:44,665 --> 00:02:47,501
You're worried about the party?
There's a man's life at stake here.
39
00:02:47,584 --> 00:02:49,294
So it's a man?
40
00:02:50,212 --> 00:02:52,214
Or woman. A human life.
41
00:02:52,881 --> 00:02:55,217
If you had to guess
who it would be
42
00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:58,470
based on their job performance
43
00:02:58,553 --> 00:03:02,182
and who you think deserves
to be fired, who would that be?
44
00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:04,559
I just answer the phone.
45
00:03:05,352 --> 00:03:08,355
And sometimes you
just let it go to voicemail.
46
00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:17,322
Your costume is fantastic.
47
00:03:18,949 --> 00:03:22,327
I know. I sent away for
it in July from a catalog.
48
00:03:24,121 --> 00:03:26,373
Pam: Oh, no. Don't, don't,
don't, don't.
49
00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:30,001
Okay.
50
00:03:30,293 --> 00:03:34,047
Oh, man.
Okay, I have to fire somebody.
51
00:03:38,635 --> 00:03:41,513
What is that? What
are you supposed to be?
52
00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:44,891
I'm the three-hole
punch version of Jim,
53
00:03:44,975 --> 00:03:48,520
'cause you can have me either way,
plain white Jim or three-hole punch.
54
00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:51,106
That's great. I like it.
Jim: Oh? Yeah.
55
00:03:51,189 --> 00:03:53,483
Yeah, well, look. What about me?
56
00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:55,152
What are...
57
00:03:56,236 --> 00:03:58,447
What are you? A monk?
58
00:04:00,490 --> 00:04:02,075
I'm a sith lord.
59
00:04:04,369 --> 00:04:05,829
Oh, big deal.
60
00:04:06,079 --> 00:04:09,082
Three round pieces of paper
taped to a shirt.
61
00:04:09,833 --> 00:04:11,835
This cost me $129.
62
00:04:12,669 --> 00:04:13,795
Ass.
63
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:20,594
Hey, you guys
excited about the party?
64
00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:22,262
It's gonna be fun.
65
00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:23,430
Yeah. Yes.
66
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:27,142
Oh, and look at you.
Showing your colors.
67
00:04:27,517 --> 00:04:30,353
Don't you wish you wore a dress
every day. What are you implying?
68
00:04:30,437 --> 00:04:32,856
All good. Happy Halloween.
69
00:04:33,023 --> 00:04:36,067
What happened to all of those
spooky decorations that we had,
70
00:04:36,151 --> 00:04:37,694
the cobwebs and such?
71
00:04:37,778 --> 00:04:40,614
Yeah, I don't know.
We put them all up last night.
72
00:04:44,659 --> 00:04:47,913
Well, you know what? Go buy
some more. I'll approve the overages.
73
00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:49,164
Sound good? Yeah.
74
00:04:49,247 --> 00:04:50,332
Good.
75
00:04:50,916 --> 00:04:53,919
Oh, yeah, also,
about budget stuff...
76
00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:59,090
I'm gonna need you to find, like, a
full employee salary plus benefits.
77
00:04:59,174 --> 00:05:00,717
Like 50 grand.
78
00:05:01,468 --> 00:05:04,012
I'm gonna need you to find
50 grand in the numbers.
79
00:05:04,095 --> 00:05:05,847
But we don't keep
two sets of books.
80
00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:08,308
Well, that's not what I'm
saying. Just, you know, find it.
81
00:05:08,391 --> 00:05:10,852
Pretend that yourjobs
depend on it.
82
00:05:18,819 --> 00:05:21,905
Interesting take on Dorothy.
I love it.
83
00:05:21,988 --> 00:05:25,534
Hey, you know what would even
be better? A soccer ball and cleats.
84
00:05:25,617 --> 00:05:28,203
Why is that?
Bend it like Beckham.
85
00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:31,581
Oh, like the movie about the
Indian girl who plays soccer?
86
00:05:31,665 --> 00:05:34,084
Yeah, that would be perfect.
87
00:05:35,252 --> 00:05:38,171
Yeah, I mean,
I guess I could do that.
88
00:05:38,255 --> 00:05:40,375
It'd be funny. I don't really
play soccer or anything.
89
00:05:40,423 --> 00:05:43,134
Well, I don't really
have two heads. So...
90
00:05:43,218 --> 00:05:47,264
Wait, what are you again?
Oh, right. Three-hole punch!
91
00:05:50,851 --> 00:05:54,145
Okay, greatest strength.
Okay, okay.
92
00:05:55,063 --> 00:05:57,858
A dog-like obedience
to authority. Nice.
93
00:05:58,817 --> 00:06:01,152
But that doesn't sound good.
Okay, okay.
94
00:06:01,862 --> 00:06:04,447
How about the ultimate
team player?
95
00:06:05,282 --> 00:06:07,284
Dwight is special.
96
00:06:07,659 --> 00:06:11,621
But I don't believe that his
talents are being used in this office.
97
00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:14,040
So Pam and I have put his resume
98
00:06:14,124 --> 00:06:17,168
on monster. Com,
Google, Craig's list.
99
00:06:17,586 --> 00:06:21,756
We're really interested most in
jobs that take Dwight out of state.
100
00:06:22,716 --> 00:06:24,843
Preferably Alaska or India.
101
00:06:25,093 --> 00:06:26,636
He's a gun nut.
102
00:06:28,138 --> 00:06:29,890
Sticks to his guns.
103
00:06:31,433 --> 00:06:33,059
Well, I looked through
all the budgets
104
00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:34,769
and there is one
department... yes.
105
00:06:34,853 --> 00:06:36,563
Yeah. That has three people...
106
00:06:36,646 --> 00:06:38,899
Doing the work
that could be done by two.
107
00:06:38,982 --> 00:06:40,483
This is great.
108
00:06:44,779 --> 00:06:45,864
Yeah.
109
00:06:48,658 --> 00:06:50,744
Who do you think it
should be? Jim, definitely.
110
00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:52,245
No, Jim brings in money.
111
00:06:52,329 --> 00:06:53,955
Phyms?
112
00:06:54,039 --> 00:06:57,667
Stanley, Pam, Oscar, Meredith,
113
00:06:58,376 --> 00:07:00,337
Kevin, Angela.
114
00:07:00,420 --> 00:07:02,130
It's not a popularity contest.
115
00:07:02,213 --> 00:07:05,467
Although it does make sense
to fire the least popular
116
00:07:05,550 --> 00:07:08,511
becausethathas
the least effect on morale.
117
00:07:09,471 --> 00:07:11,514
One of the warehouse guys.
118
00:07:12,182 --> 00:07:13,266
What?
119
00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:18,146
There is someone left off that
list? Who? Who is he saying?
120
00:07:19,564 --> 00:07:22,359
You're right. I didn't
even think of him.
121
00:07:22,567 --> 00:07:23,944
No, Michael.
122
00:07:24,027 --> 00:07:26,071
Yeah, that's actually
a really good idea. No.
123
00:07:26,154 --> 00:07:29,032
No. Not me. Yeah, I could.
124
00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:32,118
Not Dwight. I'm not
saying that's what he said.
125
00:07:32,202 --> 00:07:33,954
I know that's what he said.
126
00:07:34,037 --> 00:07:35,121
What?
127
00:07:36,081 --> 00:07:37,832
Tell him not Dwight.
128
00:07:37,916 --> 00:07:40,126
That is not a very nice thing
to say about him.
129
00:07:40,210 --> 00:07:41,294
Tell him to stop.
130
00:07:41,378 --> 00:07:43,046
Are you kidding? Quiet, you!
131
00:07:43,129 --> 00:07:45,006
I agree. He'd land on his feet.
132
00:07:45,090 --> 00:07:46,257
Make him be quiet.
133
00:07:49,844 --> 00:07:53,056
Those aren't chips and dip.
No, I made brownies.
134
00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:56,685
What?
135
00:07:56,768 --> 00:08:00,522
I'm just trying to figure out
why you're sabotaging things.
136
00:08:01,022 --> 00:08:04,943
I made brownies. And I
made cookies. Same category.
137
00:08:07,904 --> 00:08:11,199
I'm guessing Angela's
the one in the neighborhood
138
00:08:11,282 --> 00:08:15,370
who gives the trick-or-treaters
some toothbrushes,
139
00:08:16,746 --> 00:08:17,956
pennies,
140
00:08:19,249 --> 00:08:20,500
walnuts...
141
00:08:20,583 --> 00:08:22,419
Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
142
00:08:24,212 --> 00:08:25,296
Yeah.
143
00:08:26,673 --> 00:08:30,802
Just one second. I will transfer
you to our manager, Michael Scott.
144
00:08:33,471 --> 00:08:34,556
Wow.
145
00:08:37,267 --> 00:08:39,019
Michael Scott here.
146
00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:42,981
Yes, I am regional manager
of this orifice.
147
00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:44,774
Hmm-hmm.
148
00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:48,737
Dwight schrute is amazing.
149
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:50,572
Yeah.
150
00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:54,784
No, he is actually the single
greatest employee of his generation.
151
00:08:55,785 --> 00:08:56,786
Hmm-hmm.
152
00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:58,496
You know what?
I'm gonna tell you what.
153
00:08:58,580 --> 00:09:02,625
You hire Dwight k. Schrute
and he does not meet,
154
00:09:02,709 --> 00:09:07,380
nay, exceed every one
of your wildest expectations,
155
00:09:07,464 --> 00:09:12,135
well, then, you can hold me,
Michael Gary Scott
156
00:09:12,343 --> 00:09:15,138
personally and
financially responsible.
157
00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:18,433
Okay. Okay. Okay.
158
00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:20,268
Okay.
159
00:09:26,733 --> 00:09:29,652
Stanley, could you come
with me, please? No.
160
00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:35,200
As assistant regional
manager... to the?
161
00:09:35,283 --> 00:09:37,952
Look, I've got some bad news.
162
00:09:38,620 --> 00:09:41,790
You're fired. You need to
pack up your things and go.
163
00:09:42,415 --> 00:09:46,044
I'm serious, Stanley.
It's over. I'm sorry.
164
00:09:46,127 --> 00:09:47,670
"You're fired."
165
00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:50,507
Get your fingers off my phone.
166
00:09:56,262 --> 00:09:59,641
So, how did it go with
Stanley? How did he take it?
167
00:09:59,724 --> 00:10:01,768
He wouldn't listen to me.
Oh, come on.
168
00:10:01,851 --> 00:10:04,246
If you wanna fire him, you're
gonna have to tell him yourself.
169
00:10:04,270 --> 00:10:06,272
I don't wanna fire Stanley.
I never said that.
170
00:10:06,356 --> 00:10:09,150
I'm certainly not going
to do it myself.
171
00:10:09,317 --> 00:10:12,529
Get those big baleful
eyes staring at me.
172
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:15,615
Yikes. Just... okay, just...
173
00:10:17,283 --> 00:10:18,910
Cumberland mills?
174
00:10:20,370 --> 00:10:22,622
And how did you get my resume?
175
00:10:23,331 --> 00:10:25,667
Oh, no, no. I'm very
flattered. Don't get me wrong.
176
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:29,003
I'm just not sure that
it's my official résumé
177
00:10:29,087 --> 00:10:31,422
or if it's something that maybe
178
00:10:32,006 --> 00:10:34,509
a satisfied customer
posted online.
179
00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:38,888
What does it say
under martial arts training?
180
00:10:39,931 --> 00:10:42,392
Oh, okay, I'm gonna
have to supplement that.
181
00:10:42,475 --> 00:10:44,686
Could I have your fax number?
182
00:10:44,853 --> 00:10:48,690
Would I ever leave this
company? Look, I'm all about onalty.
183
00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:52,944
In fact, I feel like part of what I'm
getting paid for here is my loyalty.
184
00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:57,448
But if there were somewhere else
that valued that loyalty more highly,
185
00:10:57,949 --> 00:11:01,369
I'm going wherever
they value onalty the most.
186
00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:05,748
Oh, hey.
187
00:11:06,791 --> 00:11:10,170
Oh, your dress is stuck
in the back. Gotta just...
188
00:11:14,966 --> 00:11:16,676
So you got the fax.
189
00:11:16,759 --> 00:11:19,053
So why didn't you add it
to the resume?
190
00:11:19,137 --> 00:11:22,056
What do you mean? Of course,
martial arts training is relevant.
191
00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:23,266
Oh, excuse me,
192
00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:26,394
I know about a billion asians
that would beg to differ.
193
00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:30,732
Yeah, I get a little frustrated when
I'm dealing with incompetence!
194
00:11:30,815 --> 00:11:32,535
Well, you know what?
You can go to he”, too,
195
00:11:32,609 --> 00:11:34,861
and I will see you there
burning.
196
00:11:34,944 --> 00:11:39,115
Fine. Oh, wait, so you'll let me
know when you've made a decision...
197
00:11:43,411 --> 00:11:45,288
Jim is really talented.
198
00:11:45,830 --> 00:11:49,250
And he should be the one
who's getting a betterjob offer.
199
00:11:49,334 --> 00:11:50,835
Like, for real.
200
00:11:50,919 --> 00:11:55,548
Don't take this the wrong way,
but you should go for that job.
201
00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:03,806
Yeah. It's in Maryland.
202
00:12:04,349 --> 00:12:06,142
But, I mean, look at the salary,
203
00:12:06,226 --> 00:12:10,605
and it's definitely
a step up and a challenge.
204
00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:14,108
Yeah.
205
00:12:17,278 --> 00:12:19,489
Yeah. You know what, maybe...
206
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,533
Maybe I will.
207
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:26,955
Jim.
208
00:12:28,456 --> 00:12:31,334
This is called
leveraging an offer.
209
00:12:32,835 --> 00:12:36,172
Michael, can I talk to you
mramomem? Oh, god.
210
00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:40,468
I just thought you should know
that I was just offered a job
211
00:12:40,551 --> 00:12:42,845
with better pay,
better benefits,
212
00:12:42,929 --> 00:12:45,932
and a better title
at cumberland mills.
213
00:12:46,015 --> 00:12:48,059
Fantastic. And I turned it down.
214
00:12:48,142 --> 00:12:50,520
What? That would have
solved all my problems.
215
00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:54,691
Out of loyalty to this
company. Oh, you idiot. Go.
216
00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:57,777
So I was hoping to be made
assistant regional manager officially.
217
00:12:57,860 --> 00:13:00,446
If you left, iwouldn't
have to fire anybody.
218
00:13:00,530 --> 00:13:02,740
But then you wouldn't
have me here. Big deal.
219
00:13:02,824 --> 00:13:05,785
Oh, it would have worked out
so well. Can you get it back?
220
00:13:05,868 --> 00:13:07,954
It's in Maryland. You could
call. Can you call them?
221
00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:10,748
I can't... I suppose I... no.
222
00:13:11,249 --> 00:13:13,751
They never really
made me an offer anyway.
223
00:13:13,918 --> 00:13:16,879
Why are you torturing me? God.
224
00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:23,970
Honestly, I don't think Michael has
the slightest clue of who he's gonna fire.
225
00:13:24,053 --> 00:13:26,931
I think he keeps hoping that
someone's gonna volunteer,
226
00:13:27,015 --> 00:13:29,934
or be run over by a bus
before the deadline.
227
00:13:30,852 --> 00:13:32,652
But in the end, really,
what's gonna happen is
228
00:13:32,729 --> 00:13:36,316
it's gonna be the first person to
give him a dirty look in the hall.
229
00:13:36,399 --> 00:13:39,319
And therein lies the true
essence of his charisma.
230
00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:44,574
Can I speak to you a minute?
Yes.
231
00:14:10,683 --> 00:14:13,686
Michael, I really didn't
mean to... help me.
232
00:14:14,604 --> 00:14:17,690
I'm sorry? I want you
to role-play firing me.
233
00:14:17,774 --> 00:14:20,276
I want you to fire me,
and I will take it.
234
00:14:20,985 --> 00:14:22,403
Oh, you want me to be you. Yes.
235
00:14:22,487 --> 00:14:24,447
Okay. I want you to be
me and I will be creed.
236
00:14:24,530 --> 00:14:26,532
Oh, are you firing creed?
No, no, no.
237
00:14:26,616 --> 00:14:30,078
That's just first thing...
Came... can't... that head...
238
00:14:30,161 --> 00:14:33,539
We should switch seats in
order to... yes, that's a good idea.
239
00:14:33,623 --> 00:14:34,957
All right?
240
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:37,210
Excuse me.
241
00:14:42,173 --> 00:14:44,467
I'm really sorry,
but I have to let you go.
242
00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:48,012
And it's purely budgetary.
It's not personal...
243
00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:52,308
I'm gonna kill myself! Wow.
244
00:14:52,392 --> 00:14:55,228
I'm going to kill myself
and it's your fault!
245
00:14:55,311 --> 00:14:56,896
That's an overreaction.
246
00:14:56,979 --> 00:14:59,440
Corporate is really
breathing down my neck
247
00:14:59,524 --> 00:15:02,110
and they're saying this has to
be done by the end of the month...
248
00:15:02,193 --> 00:15:04,529
Is this you? Are you being
you? Or is this creed?
249
00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:06,364
Are you... I am...
250
00:15:07,490 --> 00:15:09,325
This is creed. Okay.
251
00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:12,245
I'm improvising.
So just try to keep up.
252
00:15:12,328 --> 00:15:13,830
And I'm very angry.
Hold that thought.
253
00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:15,993
And I want... I'm gonna
kill you. Michael Scott here.
254
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:18,167
Pntgonnaldhyou forfinngrne. Toby
255
00:15:18,251 --> 00:15:19,395
I really have to take this,
creed,
256
00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:21,419
so it was really a pleasure
working with you, okay?
257
00:15:21,462 --> 00:15:24,132
Get off. Get off.
No, no. Just get up.
258
00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:30,847
Just, just... yeah.
259
00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:36,144
What happened? It wasn't me.
260
00:15:36,227 --> 00:15:40,231
Oh, that was, like, crazy,
because I was... yeah, I know.
261
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:50,825
Hey, creed?
262
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:54,537
Could I talk to you
for a second?
263
00:15:58,708 --> 00:16:02,628
You are great
and very ambitious,
264
00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:07,341
and I feel like you want more
than this little office has to offer.
265
00:16:07,425 --> 00:16:10,636
And I understand that you'd
want to just spread your wings
266
00:16:10,928 --> 00:16:13,806
and fly the Coop.
What are you telling me?
267
00:16:13,890 --> 00:16:17,560
We're gonna have to...
You want something better.
268
00:16:17,643 --> 00:16:20,021
No, I don't.
I wanna stay right here.
269
00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:23,441
No, you wanna leave.
No, I wanna stay here.
270
00:16:23,524 --> 00:16:26,068
Now, why are you
making this so hard?
271
00:16:26,152 --> 00:16:27,952
I think there's a
misunderstanding about this.
272
00:16:28,029 --> 00:16:29,238
I think you're right.
273
00:16:29,322 --> 00:16:31,741
Canlgo? No, ofcowseyoucantgo!
274
00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:35,495
We haven't even started
this horrible process of...
275
00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:38,039
Okay, creed.
276
00:16:38,414 --> 00:16:41,918
I need to let somebody go today.
277
00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:45,922
They told me I need to
let somebody go.
278
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:48,716
And as much as I think you're
a great guy, and I like you,
279
00:16:48,799 --> 00:16:51,135
you're... goodbye.
280
00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:53,971
Let's fight it.
281
00:16:54,263 --> 00:16:57,308
Let's call jan and fight this
thing together like the old days.
282
00:16:57,391 --> 00:16:59,031
What old days?
What are you talking about?
283
00:16:59,060 --> 00:17:00,686
Did you start the paperwork yet?
284
00:17:00,770 --> 00:17:02,090
It's right here
on the desk, yeah.
285
00:17:02,146 --> 00:17:04,649
You don't have to do this,
Michael. I can't, though.
286
00:17:04,732 --> 00:17:06,984
Undo it!
I can't change anything.
287
00:17:07,068 --> 00:17:09,129
This is the way it... no. You
have the power to undo it.
288
00:17:09,153 --> 00:17:11,447
I don't. Okay, just let's
not... you can undo it.
289
00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:12,907
Michael, undo it!
290
00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:16,077
Yeah, I went hunting once.
Shot the deer in the leg.
291
00:17:16,577 --> 00:17:19,205
Had to kill it with a shovel,
took about an hour.
292
00:17:19,288 --> 00:17:20,498
Why do you ask?
293
00:17:20,581 --> 00:17:23,501
I have to fire someone
today. Okay?
294
00:17:23,584 --> 00:17:28,130
Fine. Fire someone else.
Fire Devon. He's terrible.
295
00:17:28,214 --> 00:17:30,841
I am so much better
at my job than Devon.
296
00:17:30,925 --> 00:17:33,844
Okay, well, I already
picked you and you know that,
297
00:17:33,928 --> 00:17:36,847
so, unless I just
go through with this,
298
00:17:36,931 --> 00:17:39,559
you're always gonna look at me
as the guy who almost fired you.
299
00:17:39,642 --> 00:17:43,813
No, no, no, no, no, no. I will
forget so fast. You will be my savior.
300
00:17:43,896 --> 00:17:47,108
You're the guy
who gave me my life back.
301
00:17:47,733 --> 00:17:50,278
Thank you. I knew
you'd see it my way, Michael.
302
00:17:50,361 --> 00:17:51,404
God bless you.
303
00:17:51,487 --> 00:17:53,030
You're a fine man. Don't...
304
00:17:53,114 --> 00:17:54,740
Listen, you will not
regret this, either.
305
00:17:54,824 --> 00:17:57,368
Devon is terrible.
No one's gonna miss him.
306
00:17:58,411 --> 00:18:00,329
Good, good, good, good.
307
00:18:16,512 --> 00:18:19,223
Devon, could I
talk to you for a second?
308
00:18:20,099 --> 00:18:22,143
Creed's an idiot. You
know that. Well, he...
309
00:18:22,226 --> 00:18:25,146
No, no, no, no, no, no.
You had it right the first time!
310
00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:29,108
Well, maybe I did. Exactly,
you gotta go with your gut, man.
311
00:18:31,235 --> 00:18:33,112
No, I can't...
312
00:18:33,195 --> 00:18:36,157
No, I can't go back.
I would look like an idiot.
313
00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:37,908
That's why I'm being fired? No.
314
00:18:37,992 --> 00:18:39,452
So you might not look
like an idiot?
315
00:18:39,535 --> 00:18:41,037
No, it was all the stuff
that I said.
316
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:43,581
It was the business downturn
and cutbacks, and...
317
00:18:43,664 --> 00:18:45,958
You...
God, this is unbelievable!
318
00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:49,045
I just hope that you
and I can remain friends.
319
00:18:51,589 --> 00:18:54,050
Devon, wait. Please. What?
320
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:55,593
Look, look.
321
00:18:57,261 --> 00:18:59,930
In addition to severance
and everything,
322
00:19:00,014 --> 00:19:02,892
I want to give you
323
00:19:04,518 --> 00:19:07,563
this gift certificate
to chili's from me.
324
00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:11,233
Okay? No hard feelings.
325
00:19:14,987 --> 00:19:19,492
Kevin, Jim, Pam, Kelly,
Toby, Oscar, Meredith,
326
00:19:19,742 --> 00:19:21,994
Phyllis, Stanley, or the temp.
327
00:19:22,370 --> 00:19:25,414
If any of you wanna meet me for a
drink, I'm gonna be at poor Richard's.
328
00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:27,958
And the rest of you
can go to hell.
329
00:19:35,007 --> 00:19:37,301
What about the Halloween party?
330
00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:43,307
Oh, hey, Jim. Wait, stop.
331
00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:48,396
I'm sorry for pushing you
toward cumberland.
332
00:19:49,939 --> 00:19:53,484
Seriously, if you left here,
I would blow my brains out.
333
00:19:55,569 --> 00:19:56,821
Come on.
334
00:19:57,738 --> 00:19:59,907
Jim: That's just
a figure of speech, you know.
335
00:19:59,990 --> 00:20:02,159
Blow your brains out? Come on.
336
00:20:02,243 --> 00:20:04,203
All it really means is
that we 're friends.
337
00:20:04,286 --> 00:20:07,957
And who else is she gonna
talk to if I'm gone? Right?
338
00:20:08,582 --> 00:20:11,544
I mean, if she left,
I wouldn't blow my brains out.
339
00:20:11,627 --> 00:20:15,214
Of course, I would take that job in
Maryland because it's double the pay
340
00:20:15,297 --> 00:20:18,843
and soft-shell crab just
happens to be my favorite food.
341
00:20:26,809 --> 00:20:27,893
Michael: I love Halloween.
342
00:20:27,977 --> 00:20:31,605
You know, it's just... but it's
just fun. Every year, it's just fun.
343
00:20:31,689 --> 00:20:34,859
Last Halloween, I came
as Janet Jackson's boob.
344
00:20:36,402 --> 00:20:39,280
It was topical. People
got a big kick out of it.
345
00:20:39,363 --> 00:20:42,366
The year before that
I came as Monica Lewinsky,
346
00:20:42,992 --> 00:20:45,077
and I wore a stained dress.
347
00:20:45,619 --> 00:20:48,456
The year before that, I also
came as Monica Lewinsky,
348
00:20:48,539 --> 00:20:52,460
and before that I was o.J.
It was pretty funny.
349
00:20:52,543 --> 00:20:54,670
Oh, I wish you were
here last year.
350
00:21:03,679 --> 00:21:05,514
Kids: Trick-or-treat!
351
00:21:05,598 --> 00:21:07,475
Hey. How you doing?
352
00:21:07,558 --> 00:21:09,643
Wow, you guys look great!
353
00:21:09,727 --> 00:21:12,855
I'm a bumble bee.
You look great.
354
00:21:13,063 --> 00:21:15,232
And you're a Princess?
A fairy Princess.
355
00:21:15,316 --> 00:21:17,443
A fairy Princess.
You're very... I'm a lion!
356
00:21:17,526 --> 00:21:19,612
You're a lion. Wow.
I wanna hear your...
357
00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:22,740
Oh! Okay, that's all yours.
That's all yours. Okay!
358
00:21:22,823 --> 00:21:23,908
Grab it. Grab it.
359
00:21:23,991 --> 00:21:25,911
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