Original subtitles

I don't like this!

Hi,

Mum!

You know that your grandmother burned her bra so that we didn't have to?

My hug is now, are we?

Hey, Tara. Happy birthday.

Oh. Told them you don't do birthday gifts.

Ah, I do when it's an 08L song. Thank you very much. Well, it'll pair nicely

with my gift. Surprise poetry reading.

That will be appropriate, will it? Of course.

Because the people in your poems are a bit... unsavoury.

Oh!

They're utterly... And that will make the listeners feel even better about

themselves.

Need help with the blini?

Oh, I would love that. Maybe you can pipe the cream through and I'll do the

caviar? Perfect.

Well, I won't be talking about the blinis when I'm through with them.

Oh, my goodness, that daughter of yours is exceptional.

That's good.

You're really growing into your jawline, aren't you?

Oh, stop.

All right.

All right. Prepare to have your mind casually blown.

Gets it right?

Already.

It's been over an hour.

You found something appropriate?

I can read a room.

After all, I am a prophet. I am a visionary. I am an icon.

Right.

Whoa.

High school.

Feels like a lifetime ago.

We were different people, eh?

You and Sadie Sadie. What are you doing there?

Talking about Sadie. You started it.

And it just sucks we had to deal with her all those years.

Broken bitch masquerading as a wunderkind.

I loved her.

No, you didn't.

You couldn't.

Because she wasn't her own bad.

Wait, what?

Time to grind.

What did you mean when you were talking... Oh, end me.

Florian, if you can't hide what you're feeling, get Botox.

Hi, Ryan.

You really need to sort that handshake.

I suppose that's booming.

I bet.

I hear you've gone viral.

Should get that looked at by a doctor.

Literally, genius is incurable.

I'm glad you're here. I wanted to say thank you.

Oh? You know it destroys Sadie.

Anyway, that's all in the past. We're all different people now, aren't you?

But before we move on, just to say thank you, really.

What you both did to Sadie, it was a necessary evil, an act of kindness. It's

good she's gone. But don't you dare try that shit on me.

Lol.

Because, God, I'm so durable.

I'm honestly stronger than you know. Yeah, okay, let's go have a good picture

at hand, eh?

What was that? What?

The shit about Sadie.

I've been letting it slide because I thought it was your way of processing us

getting together.

Isn't that nice of you?

of Chernobyl. Or you pay to stand in radiation.

What can I say? I was young and hungry for perspective.

Thank you.

Yes.

I read him the whole of his Albertine letters and he thanked her kindly and

went to sleep.

Are you making a request?

No, I remember this.

It was first year uni and I had that really bad flu.

I mean, look.

How about this one?

Once she left a suicide note for her goldfish.

These poems are about us.

Good evening, everyone.

In honour of my mum's birthday, I'm going to give a surprise reading.

This is titled... champagne for her real friends, champagne also for

her other friends.

Oh, no, wait, wait, wait.

She remembers taking a shit once in year one, and her two best friends demanded

to come look at it afterwards.

Disgusting, they remarked. She was embarrassed, but also pleased.

Can't you see? Can't you see how your love's affecting our reality?

I love to feel this way.

I love to feel this medium way. I love to have become estranged from my menace

to have broken my past.

We're just a sneak peek. If you want to hear more, you'll need to come to the

book launch.

Baba.

So, Kara, what are we thinking for the book launch?

Unity being far too obvious, maybe.

How are you involved in all this?

She's my patron.

I'm having her publish her poetry.

Are they all like that?

Well, I don't imagine they're all about defecating children, if that's what you

mean.

What's the point?

Well, let's ask the others.

Oh, you know.

Naming and shaming all my personal baddies.

Not my baddies.

Yeah, figure of speech.

Flo, it's okay to be honest.

Be honest?

Yeah,

sure, DeGeneres.

I'd love to finally be honest about, well, the fact that you spent your

entire life riding on the coattails of powerful women while simultaneously

trying to...

unpick them like a theme just to make yourself look more put together.

God forbid someone finally realises you are in fact a little sissy.

It's not your fault.

It's really thanks to your beautiful parents that praise are heaped upon you

your entire life by your astoundingly comprehensive averageness.

Because in reality, bud,

The most interesting thing about you is that you spell your name with a silent

fucking D.

And oh my lord, does it say something about the world that you were never

bullied for that in high school?

It's alright, I think I'm done.

Except to wonder, how many other white boys from Karori come twice as hard when

they're being pissed on?

Should we start a survey, babe?

Oh.

Emotions are sacred to boys.

Oh, but don't worry.

In this house, we know that to drive away a boy is effortless.

Now, a toast. See? A toast.

To my mother. No, no, no. Yeah, the woman who taught us all how to be, and

say it with me now, mum, pretty, poised, perfect.

I mean, who else, who else would spend a week preparing food to impress their

friends? No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

They need to appreciate you.

be tears.

Mum, there have been moments that I have feared you.

Maybe, maybe even hated you.

But truly, I love you.

I love you.

We all do. Hey, we all do.

Where are the souffles?

I didn't bring one.

Where are the souffles? It's not even a souffle.

It's time to go home.

I understand.

You are an...

Thank you for watching.

I'm Flo Settler.

Viral online sensation and poet.

Alumni. Used to be here, girl. Now she's method success.

Getting published is hard.

It takes confidence.

Let's speak to the text itself, shall we?

that head girl went viral uh yes why did you film it well funny story uh and why

weren't you in it i actually didn't mean to because it was too personal it's not

personal it sounded pretty personal she might be ashamed

are you ashamed

Enough questions.

A reading, eh?

This one.

Is she original?

Yeah.

Is she the only one? Yeah.

She comes into her own in a dimly lit room. She comes forth like a visitation

upon herself.

She is a prophet. She is a visionary. She is an icon.

She is God.

Three years ago, Chris came here every fortnight, and every fortnight she

promised her she wouldn't suicide. And the next fortnight, and she keeps her

promises. She used to keep promises.

She used to be a good girl, or at least she used to be.

You just went silent.

And then you stood and stared for like five, seven minutes.

And you laid down and curled up in a ball.

Miss Marbury said it was a psychotic episode and went to go get the school

counsellor.

Do you need a hug?

I hate hugs.

Well, get in.

I don't know what happened.

I think maybe I'm not okay.

I mean, I... Yes, it's becoming clear.

I just don't understand.

Everything was going so well.

It wasn't us.

It's been bad for, I don't know, Emma.

Get in the car and we can talk about it. Wait.

I need your help, Mum, okay?

Please, just for once, I just need you to listen and not... Oh, I can nothing

but listen to you and support you and carry you through...

Boyfriends and book deals and... How do you go and behave like that in front of

all of my friends?

You are just like your father.

I have tried my best, Florence.

And for you to call me a bad mother...

Just get in the car!

You know, I have this memory of you sending me to my room during one of your

dinner parties. Must have been like eight.

And sneaking into the corridor and seeing you in this pool of light and you

had this incredible gold dress and you were talking to one of your fancy

friends and you said, I remember every word you said.

You know, sometimes I can't help feeling like I've given birth to an abomination.

You win.

We'll find you an overpriced therapist with chunky jewelry and a jazzy haircut,

and you can spend all your time telling her what a fucking asshole I am!

I just want to teach you how to hate yourself.

I have this friend who can go fuck herself.

They won't be more hiding from me.

I'd

like

to see you when you recognize your era.

Oh, are you sad?

Tell me something.

Why don't you go write a poem about it? That old rum beat.

Die.

I just wish, I just wish

One thing I know about the future is that in the future I am dead.