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[♪♪♪]
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[APPLAUSE]
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- Hi. I'm Larry.
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This is my brother Darryl,
5
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and this is my other brother
Darryl.
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- Hi, fellas.
What can we do for you?
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- That depends.
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How do you two
feel about the swamp?
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- Well, we love it
as much as the next guy.
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- Then brace yourselves.
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Some big-city developers
want to fill it in.
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- Well, I'm sorry, Larry.
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I know how much you three
enjoy that swamp,
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especially during
mosquito season.
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- That swamp holds
memories for us.
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Darryl got his first kiss there.
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Remember that bullfrog,
Darryl?
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- Well,
there'll be other swamps,
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other...frogs.
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- We have a plan
to save this swamp.
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With enough cash,
we can purchase it ourselves,
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and we all know that
the best way to raise cash
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is through a walkathon.
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- Well, that's, uh,
that's the way
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the major corporations
do it.
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- Now a walkathon needs
two things:
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People willing to walk
28
00:02:07,528 --> 00:02:10,195
and people willing to pledge
a dollar a mile.
29
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We're willing to walk.
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- Well then,
then you're halfway there.
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- Guys, we'd be happy
to sponsor you.
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- Thanks.
We'll start walking now.
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The swamp will survive!
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When your grandkids want to play
slip-n-slide in some algae,
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you won't have to take them
to a theme park.
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[APPLAUSE]
37
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- Well, it's only
a dollar a mile.
38
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- Well, I guess it's worth it
just to see the smiles
39
00:02:44,298 --> 00:02:46,298
on those algae-covered kids.
40
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- Well,
it's that time of year again.
41
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- The new phone books are out?
42
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- That too?
Wow, when it rains, it pours.
43
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- What are you talking about,
George?
44
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- What do you think?
45
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The Ye Olde Apple Days Festival.
46
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It seems like only yesterday
when Great-great Grandpa Utley
47
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hosted the first one
back in 1816.
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- I-I heard that
Ye Olde Apple Days
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is being discontinued.
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- Who told you that?
51
00:03:18,632 --> 00:03:19,464
- I-I'm not sure.
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00:03:20,434 --> 00:03:22,501
I just remember hearing
talk about ending it
53
00:03:22,670 --> 00:03:25,770
because some people
found it excruciatingly...
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uh, dull.
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- Ye Olde Apple Days?
56
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- Maybe-maybe I'm thinking
of the Ice Capades.
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- Well, we're back
from the mall, all,
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and we come bearing
a bounty of riches.
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- Uh, the bounty is for us.
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I don't know if Michael
made that clear.
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- Hey, are you two going
to the town meeting tonight?
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I'll be talking about
Ye Olde Apple Days.
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- Oh, I'd love to, George,
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but I think Steph and I
are going to stay in tonight
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and take a finger trip through
the new Neiman's catalog.
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- Uh, Michael.
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I want to go.
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00:04:01,308 --> 00:04:03,174
Don't you remember
the last town meeting?
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00:04:03,344 --> 00:04:05,277
- Yeah,
we sat in the back and...
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00:04:05,446 --> 00:04:07,246
made fun of what
everybody was wearing.
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00:04:08,682 --> 00:04:09,748
Wouldn't miss it, George.
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- Great!
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00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:15,487
- And George, would you please
wear those bright green pants?
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00:04:15,689 --> 00:04:17,689
You know, the ones
that show off your ankles.
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00:04:17,858 --> 00:04:18,923
- Sure.
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00:04:20,761 --> 00:04:23,762
- And Dick, you can just wear
what you have on.
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[MICHAEL CHUCKLES]
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- Okay, all in favor of
Annette Gordon
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being in charge of refreshments
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for future town meetings,
raise your hand.
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All opposed.
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00:04:50,857 --> 00:04:53,057
You're in.
The citizens have spoken.
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- Boy, that certainly wasn't
the slugfest I expected.
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00:05:00,801 --> 00:05:03,802
- George, I believe you have
the next order of business.
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[BOTH GIGGLE]
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00:05:10,744 --> 00:05:14,413
- Please hold your giggling
until everyone has spoken.
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00:05:16,684 --> 00:05:19,217
- Well, as everybody knows,
the Utley family
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has been in charge of
organizing Ye Olde Apple Days.
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[LOW MURMUR]
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00:05:25,058 --> 00:05:26,891
- Quiet down!
91
00:05:27,060 --> 00:05:29,394
George, didn't we put a stop
to that thing?
92
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- No!
93
00:05:30,864 --> 00:05:33,365
- Make a note.
Let's put a stop to that thing.
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00:05:34,802 --> 00:05:38,236
- I thought everyone liked
Ye Olde Apple Days.
95
00:05:38,405 --> 00:05:39,571
[CROWD MURMURING AGAIN]
96
00:05:45,412 --> 00:05:48,447
- Maybe you should give
George some support.
97
00:05:48,615 --> 00:05:50,482
- I-I think he's doing fine.
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00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:56,921
[GIGGLES]
99
00:05:59,893 --> 00:06:02,461
- The chair recognizes
Dick Loudon.
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00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:09,300
- Uh, thank you.
101
00:06:09,470 --> 00:06:13,772
I-I know this event isn't
as exciting as it used to be.
102
00:06:13,940 --> 00:06:19,244
There is a certain
sameness to it year after...
103
00:06:19,413 --> 00:06:21,813
year after year.
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00:06:21,982 --> 00:06:27,819
And it has lost some of its
appeal since the advent of...
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radio.
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00:06:31,492 --> 00:06:34,760
- Wow, Dick, why don't you
just knife George in the back!
107
00:06:36,597 --> 00:06:40,832
- Look, Ye Olde Apple Days
is a town tradition,
108
00:06:41,001 --> 00:06:43,802
and I don't think
that we should give up on it.
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00:06:43,970 --> 00:06:46,538
If it isn't working,
we should fix it.
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All it needs
are some new ideas.
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- Do you have
any new ideas, Dick?
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- Uh, no.
113
00:06:54,648 --> 00:06:56,448
- So basically
you just like to hear
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the sound of your own voice.
115
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[MICHAEL GIGGLES]
116
00:07:01,889 --> 00:07:06,057
- Maybe Michael has some ideas
if he's not too busy giggling.
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00:07:13,166 --> 00:07:15,233
- Michael,
everyone's staring at us.
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Make them stop.
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- What do you people want?
120
00:07:22,075 --> 00:07:25,777
- Well, we all thought
that since you're hip, you could
121
00:07:25,946 --> 00:07:30,549
help George with some new
ideas for Ye Olde Apple Days.
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00:07:30,717 --> 00:07:32,784
- Y-you all think I'm hip?
123
00:07:32,953 --> 00:07:33,952
- The hippest.
124
00:07:35,856 --> 00:07:38,356
- Well, I guess I could
spitball some ideas.
125
00:07:38,525 --> 00:07:41,359
- Great! All in favor of
Michael spitballing,
126
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raise your hand.
127
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- Wow, it's a landslide!
128
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- Hey, Dicksters.
129
00:07:57,210 --> 00:08:00,378
What do you think about
this idea for the apple fest?
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00:08:00,547 --> 00:08:02,714
Female applesauce wrestling.
131
00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:09,888
- It's uh, a little tasteless
but delicious.
132
00:08:10,090 --> 00:08:10,989
- Of course it's delish.
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It sprung from
the Georgeman's gray cells.
134
00:08:13,494 --> 00:08:15,293
- Hey, Michael,
I just got another idea.
135
00:08:15,462 --> 00:08:17,662
Why don't we have kids
paint pictures of apples
136
00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:20,565
and give a prize
for the best one?
137
00:08:20,734 --> 00:08:22,934
- What a genius!
I could kiss you.
138
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:25,670
- You're a man.
139
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:30,041
- Well, that painting idea
is brilliant.
140
00:08:30,210 --> 00:08:32,644
Which doesn't mean
we couldn't put a twist on it.
141
00:08:32,813 --> 00:08:33,778
Whoa! Revelation.
142
00:08:33,947 --> 00:08:35,680
Instead of little kids painting,
we get adults.
143
00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:36,681
- How come?
144
00:08:37,651 --> 00:08:38,583
- Well, little kids,
paint brushes, nostrils.
145
00:08:38,752 --> 00:08:39,718
- Well, you're right.
146
00:08:39,887 --> 00:08:43,321
No ceremony is worth
injuring children.
147
00:08:43,524 --> 00:08:45,123
- And instead of canvases,
we paint the apples
148
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directly onto
the applesauce wrestlers.
149
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What do you think?
150
00:08:49,796 --> 00:08:52,497
- That's a twisted idea
all right.
151
00:08:52,666 --> 00:08:54,098
- It's just another
nugget of a notion
152
00:08:54,267 --> 00:08:56,601
from the goldmine
of the Georgemonster.
153
00:08:58,572 --> 00:09:01,406
- What do you think about
an apple sack race?
154
00:09:01,575 --> 00:09:02,407
- Eureka! The motherlode!
155
00:09:02,576 --> 00:09:04,342
I love it.
I wouldn't change a thing.
156
00:09:04,511 --> 00:09:05,510
[PHONE RINGS]
157
00:09:05,679 --> 00:09:07,579
All right.
First off, we 86 the sacks.
158
00:09:10,483 --> 00:09:11,683
- Hello, Stratford Inn.
159
00:09:11,852 --> 00:09:12,951
- Hi. This is Larry.
160
00:09:13,119 --> 00:09:14,753
Next to me is my brother,
Darryl...
161
00:09:16,122 --> 00:09:17,656
and my other brother, Darryl.
162
00:09:19,927 --> 00:09:21,492
- What, what can I do
for you guys?
163
00:09:21,662 --> 00:09:23,929
- We thought you'd like
an update on our walkathon.
164
00:09:24,097 --> 00:09:25,697
We're in Cheshire, Connecticut.
165
00:09:29,135 --> 00:09:32,871
- You, you mean you've been
walking for four days?
166
00:09:33,040 --> 00:09:34,439
- Not technically.
167
00:09:34,608 --> 00:09:35,440
To break the monotony,
168
00:09:36,443 --> 00:09:37,842
we hopped on one foot
through the Berkshires.
169
00:09:38,011 --> 00:09:40,645
Darryl, don't eat that!
170
00:09:40,814 --> 00:09:42,881
- At a dollar a mile,
I must owe...
171
00:09:44,250 --> 00:09:46,618
where exactly is Cheshire?
172
00:09:46,787 --> 00:09:48,019
- Uh-oh. Gotta go.
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00:09:48,188 --> 00:09:49,554
Darryl, how many times
do I have to tell you,
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00:09:49,756 --> 00:09:52,057
face away from the road
when you do that!
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00:09:57,297 --> 00:09:58,730
- Where is...
where's my atlas?
176
00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:01,866
- Gee, I don't know, Michael.
177
00:10:02,035 --> 00:10:05,570
A laser light show
sounds a little high tech.
178
00:10:05,739 --> 00:10:08,740
- Georgie Porgie, puddin'
and pie, it was your idea!
179
00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:11,843
- I thought my idea
was an apple sack race.
180
00:10:12,012 --> 00:10:13,078
- That's what this is.
181
00:10:13,246 --> 00:10:14,479
Now come on,
let's down some decaf
182
00:10:14,648 --> 00:10:16,915
and flesh out your idea about
skinny dipping for apples.
183
00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:20,018
- That was bobbing.
184
00:10:26,259 --> 00:10:27,859
[PHONE RINGS]
185
00:10:31,999 --> 00:10:32,998
- Hello.
186
00:10:36,737 --> 00:10:37,802
Hello.
187
00:10:39,239 --> 00:10:43,407
Da-Darryl, if that's you,
could you put Larry on, please?
188
00:10:49,049 --> 00:10:50,214
Hi.
Hi, Larry.
189
00:10:50,383 --> 00:10:51,983
Wh-where are you now?
190
00:10:53,419 --> 00:10:55,120
- In a place called
the South Bronx
191
00:10:55,288 --> 00:10:56,855
though the absence
of magnolia trees
192
00:10:57,057 --> 00:10:58,957
makes me think
it's not the Deep South.
193
00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:04,228
- You've gone another 100 miles.
194
00:11:04,397 --> 00:11:06,397
When are you guys coming home?
We miss you!
195
00:11:08,268 --> 00:11:11,002
- Actually, we almost
turned back this morning.
196
00:11:11,171 --> 00:11:12,971
Darryl had this
blister on his foot.
197
00:11:13,140 --> 00:11:15,106
Fortunately, it turned out
to be an extra toe
198
00:11:15,275 --> 00:11:16,775
we'd never noticed before.
199
00:11:20,313 --> 00:11:21,680
Darryl, don't buy that Rolex.
200
00:11:21,848 --> 00:11:23,514
It's a knockoff.
I gotta go.
201
00:11:23,684 --> 00:11:25,083
I'm losin' control
over these boys.
202
00:11:27,154 --> 00:11:28,319
- They've got to be stopped!
203
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:35,193
Hi, George.
204
00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:38,029
What, what are you doing
out so late?
205
00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:39,764
- Just walking.
206
00:11:41,234 --> 00:11:43,401
- Do, do I owe you money
for that?
207
00:11:46,306 --> 00:11:48,073
- I don't think so.
208
00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:49,240
- Good.
209
00:11:50,476 --> 00:11:53,945
Uh, George, are you,
uh, are you all right?
210
00:11:54,114 --> 00:11:55,180
- Not really.
211
00:11:55,348 --> 00:11:59,084
You remember how Michael
called me a goldmine of ideas?
212
00:11:59,252 --> 00:12:00,051
- Yeah.
213
00:12:01,121 --> 00:12:03,654
- Well, he took the ideas
and gave me the shaft.
214
00:12:03,857 --> 00:12:06,891
The Georgemonster
has been fired.
215
00:12:22,375 --> 00:12:25,009
- George,
the new phone book's here.
216
00:12:27,114 --> 00:12:28,279
You want me to
look up your name for you?
217
00:12:28,448 --> 00:12:30,281
That usually cheers you up.
218
00:12:30,450 --> 00:12:31,616
- Sure.
219
00:12:31,785 --> 00:12:33,985
It's probably
under "U" for unhip.
220
00:12:35,488 --> 00:12:37,088
- Now just because
Michael says you aren't hip
221
00:12:37,290 --> 00:12:38,723
doesn't mean anything.
222
00:12:38,892 --> 00:12:40,291
Well, you're just as hip as...
223
00:12:41,561 --> 00:12:43,261
Dick.
224
00:12:43,429 --> 00:12:45,396
- Whoa, half-price slipper sale.
225
00:12:47,801 --> 00:12:49,267
- Thanks, Joanna.
226
00:12:53,406 --> 00:12:56,507
- Hello, fellow citizens
of Appleopolis.
227
00:12:57,844 --> 00:12:58,843
- Michael, if you don't
tell them right away,
228
00:12:59,012 --> 00:13:00,011
I'll burst!
229
00:13:00,113 --> 00:13:01,913
- All right.
230
00:13:02,082 --> 00:13:02,914
Prepare your accolades.
231
00:13:04,017 --> 00:13:05,116
The apple fest is now
a Michael Harris production
232
00:13:05,285 --> 00:13:06,151
in association with
233
00:13:06,319 --> 00:13:08,753
Stephanie Vanderkellen
Enterprises.
234
00:13:08,922 --> 00:13:11,856
- Michael made me
his co-producer!
235
00:13:12,058 --> 00:13:15,226
- Exactly what
does a co-producer do?
236
00:13:15,395 --> 00:13:17,262
- I welcome people.
237
00:13:17,430 --> 00:13:20,398
I lie and tell them
how nice they look.
238
00:13:20,566 --> 00:13:24,135
I smile demurely when
they tell me how nice I look.
239
00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:28,273
- Great-great Grandpa Utley
never smiled demurely.
240
00:13:28,441 --> 00:13:29,774
- Well, if you'll excuse me,
241
00:13:29,943 --> 00:13:31,776
I have to go sit
in front of my makeup mirror
242
00:13:31,945 --> 00:13:33,511
and practice sincerity.
243
00:13:37,217 --> 00:13:38,917
I'll miss you all.
244
00:13:39,085 --> 00:13:40,318
- Good start, Steph.
245
00:13:43,256 --> 00:13:44,388
And while you're up there,
pick out a dress
246
00:13:44,590 --> 00:13:47,192
that won't clash with
the ballroom at the Ramada.
247
00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:49,027
- You're holding
Ye Olde Apple Days
248
00:13:49,196 --> 00:13:51,029
at the Ramada Inn?
249
00:13:51,198 --> 00:13:53,464
- No, we're holding
Apples Apples Apples there.
250
00:13:53,633 --> 00:13:55,466
New name, new concept,
new zip!
251
00:13:56,602 --> 00:13:58,369
- What kind of zip is that?
252
00:13:58,538 --> 00:14:00,271
- Well, just your usual
singing, dancing,
253
00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:02,406
multimedia spectacular
kind of zip.
254
00:14:02,575 --> 00:14:06,010
- Great-great Grandpa Utley
would be shocked!
255
00:14:06,179 --> 00:14:07,145
- Well, I've gotta run.
I'm meeting DeeDee,
256
00:14:07,314 --> 00:14:09,180
the choreographer,
for a well drink.
257
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:14,953
- Wait a minute!
258
00:14:15,121 --> 00:14:15,954
Where is it written
259
00:14:17,023 --> 00:14:20,024
there can't be two
Ye Olde Apple Days festivals?
260
00:14:20,227 --> 00:14:23,394
- I-I don't know, but I'm sure
I saw it somewhere, George.
261
00:14:25,065 --> 00:14:28,066
- I'm going to hold my own
festival right here in the Inn,
262
00:14:28,235 --> 00:14:29,400
where it should be.
263
00:14:29,569 --> 00:14:32,103
Ye Olde Apple Days lives!
264
00:14:33,273 --> 00:14:36,074
- Does...
does it have to live here?
265
00:14:43,449 --> 00:14:45,416
- Well, I guess
this is everybody.
266
00:14:47,653 --> 00:14:49,387
- George, I'm sorry.
267
00:14:49,555 --> 00:14:50,388
- Oh, it figures.
268
00:14:50,556 --> 00:14:52,991
Michael advertised
his show on TV.
269
00:14:53,193 --> 00:14:54,893
I relied on word of mouth.
270
00:14:55,061 --> 00:14:57,128
I wish you two had friends.
271
00:14:59,165 --> 00:15:00,398
- Well, it--
it's still early.
272
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:04,002
I wouldn't mind waiting
a few more hours.
273
00:15:04,170 --> 00:15:07,138
- Well, that wouldn't be fair
to the people who did show up.
274
00:15:07,307 --> 00:15:09,073
Besides, we could have
just as much fun with three
275
00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:11,742
as we can with 300.
276
00:15:11,912 --> 00:15:15,346
- Yeah, it's just that with 300,
it doesn't seem so stupid.
277
00:15:16,950 --> 00:15:19,918
- Well, I guess it's time
for my opening speech.
278
00:15:23,456 --> 00:15:25,056
Quiet down, please.
279
00:15:29,229 --> 00:15:35,466
Welcome to the 172nd
Ye Olde Apple Days festival.
280
00:15:35,635 --> 00:15:38,903
I see a few
unfamiliar faces out there.
281
00:15:39,072 --> 00:15:41,205
- George, why don't we just
skip the speech
282
00:15:41,374 --> 00:15:43,207
and go right on
to the activities.
283
00:15:43,376 --> 00:15:44,943
- Good idea.
284
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:49,814
Would a pie-eating contest
with three people seem stupid?
285
00:15:49,983 --> 00:15:52,216
- A pie-eating contest can be
held with any number of people
286
00:15:52,385 --> 00:15:53,484
without looking stupid.
287
00:15:53,653 --> 00:15:55,987
- Really? Okay. Then it will be
just you and Joanna.
288
00:15:56,156 --> 00:15:57,155
I'll be the judge.
289
00:16:01,428 --> 00:16:04,528
Contestants, take your seats.
290
00:16:06,399 --> 00:16:08,532
Grab your forks.
291
00:16:08,701 --> 00:16:09,968
Go!
292
00:16:28,688 --> 00:16:31,456
- Willkommen,
bienvenue, welcome.
293
00:16:33,193 --> 00:16:34,192
- What?
294
00:16:35,462 --> 00:16:38,196
- Stephanie, I'm usually
not one to complain,
295
00:16:38,365 --> 00:16:42,566
but these ticket prices...
$22.50 a person?
296
00:16:42,735 --> 00:16:46,037
- Well, obviously you've never
been to a Broadway show.
297
00:16:46,206 --> 00:16:49,340
- No, but we did see the
movie version of The Music Man
298
00:16:49,509 --> 00:16:51,142
starring Robert Preston.
299
00:16:51,311 --> 00:16:52,743
- And Buddy Hackett.
300
00:16:54,414 --> 00:16:56,680
Boy, that guy's
a national treasure.
301
00:16:58,451 --> 00:17:00,184
- Jim, that was Stubby Kaye.
302
00:17:00,353 --> 00:17:02,120
- You're crazy.
It was Buddy Hackett.
303
00:17:02,288 --> 00:17:04,055
- I'm crazy?
You're the crazy one.
304
00:17:04,224 --> 00:17:05,089
It was Stubby Kaye.
305
00:17:05,258 --> 00:17:07,425
- Oh, you think
everybody is Stubby Kaye.
306
00:17:13,466 --> 00:17:16,834
- Willkommen, bienvenue,
welcome.
307
00:17:17,003 --> 00:17:18,002
- What?
308
00:17:19,205 --> 00:17:20,338
- Oh, here!
309
00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:26,444
- Ladies and gentlemen,
310
00:17:26,612 --> 00:17:28,413
presenting
a Michael Harris production
311
00:17:28,581 --> 00:17:29,414
in association with
312
00:17:29,582 --> 00:17:32,517
Stephanie Vanderkellen
Enterprises.
313
00:17:32,685 --> 00:17:35,686
[♪♪♪]
314
00:17:40,793 --> 00:17:44,462
♪ Apples Apples ♪
315
00:17:44,630 --> 00:17:47,331
♪ To sing their praises
We'll thrilled to the core ♪
316
00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:51,001
♪ Ye Olde Apple Days
was a bore ♪
317
00:17:51,171 --> 00:17:54,439
♪ Now Michael Harris
Has more in store ♪
318
00:17:54,607 --> 00:17:56,607
♪ It's Apples ♪
319
00:17:56,776 --> 00:17:58,676
♪ Apples ♪
320
00:17:58,844 --> 00:18:02,080
♪ No other fruit we do
Has got such appeal ♪
321
00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:03,881
♪ Baldwin Granny McIntosh ♪
322
00:18:04,050 --> 00:18:05,583
♪ Every one is great by gosh ♪
323
00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:08,486
♪ Rome Delicious Pippin too
Just efficient ♪
324
00:18:08,654 --> 00:18:12,190
♪ Rip into an Apple ♪
325
00:18:12,358 --> 00:18:15,126
♪ Apple ♪
326
00:18:15,328 --> 00:18:18,463
♪ We just love
Ye Olde Apple Days ♪
327
00:18:18,631 --> 00:18:25,936
♪ So this tradition is Michael's
rendition of Apples ♪
328
00:18:26,106 --> 00:18:27,505
♪ Apples ♪
329
00:18:27,673 --> 00:18:31,342
♪ Apples ♪
330
00:18:31,511 --> 00:18:34,512
[APPLAUSE]
331
00:18:46,559 --> 00:18:48,426
- Here you go, Dick.
Good luck!
332
00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:56,167
- Is it an apple?
333
00:18:58,404 --> 00:19:02,006
- Dick, you're supposed
to guess what kind!
334
00:19:02,175 --> 00:19:04,942
- Um, McIntosh.
335
00:19:05,111 --> 00:19:06,110
- Sorry.
336
00:19:07,213 --> 00:19:08,212
- Damn!
337
00:19:12,285 --> 00:19:14,318
- Here.
It's your turn, Joanna.
338
00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:15,653
Good luck!
339
00:19:18,791 --> 00:19:19,957
- Pippin?
340
00:19:20,126 --> 00:19:22,926
- Yeah!
You really know your apples.
341
00:19:23,129 --> 00:19:26,564
- Well, after you've eaten
four Pippin pies...
342
00:19:28,234 --> 00:19:29,700
- This is your fifth ribbon.
343
00:19:29,869 --> 00:19:31,202
- Oh, thanks, George.
344
00:19:31,371 --> 00:19:33,604
Boy, I'm running out of room!
345
00:19:33,773 --> 00:19:35,706
- Hey, it's apple-bobbing time.
346
00:19:35,875 --> 00:19:37,675
I'll get the tub.
347
00:19:37,843 --> 00:19:40,311
- Dick, he's getting the tub.
348
00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:42,246
We have got to
put an end to this.
349
00:19:42,415 --> 00:19:44,549
- Sure, now that
you're ahead five ribbons!
350
00:19:48,621 --> 00:19:49,453
- Let's just tell George
351
00:19:50,590 --> 00:19:52,690
it's impossible to have
a festival with three people.
352
00:19:52,858 --> 00:19:55,793
- Hey, I think I could have
bobbed the pants off of you!
353
00:19:58,698 --> 00:20:00,631
Uh, George.
354
00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:03,067
Could-could we speak to you?
355
00:20:03,236 --> 00:20:05,102
- I know what
you're going to say.
356
00:20:05,271 --> 00:20:09,440
Ye Olde Apple Days
is a ye olde bomb.
357
00:20:09,609 --> 00:20:11,942
- Well, I wouldn't
say "ye olde."
358
00:20:17,283 --> 00:20:19,650
- Hey, are we too late
for apple keno?
359
00:20:20,753 --> 00:20:22,320
- Can't you see the tub, Jim?
360
00:20:22,488 --> 00:20:24,755
They're only up to
apple bobbing.
361
00:20:24,924 --> 00:20:26,123
- What are you doing here?
362
00:20:26,292 --> 00:20:27,658
- We walked out
of Michael's show.
363
00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:29,860
It was awful!
364
00:20:30,029 --> 00:20:32,129
- We didn't get to do anything!
365
00:20:32,298 --> 00:20:35,299
No spin the apple,
no apple limbo.
366
00:20:35,468 --> 00:20:36,834
All we did
was sit and watch.
367
00:20:37,002 --> 00:20:38,802
- Yeah, the worst part was
Michael strutting around
368
00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:40,571
like some apple pimp.
369
00:20:44,009 --> 00:20:47,378
- Chester, what is that
on your cheek?
370
00:20:48,814 --> 00:20:49,714
- Oh, dear!
371
00:20:50,750 --> 00:20:52,983
Those laser beams
must have vaporized my eye!
372
00:20:54,987 --> 00:20:56,854
- It looks like applesauce.
373
00:20:59,325 --> 00:21:00,824
- So it is.
374
00:21:00,993 --> 00:21:02,493
- I told you
not to lean in so close
375
00:21:02,695 --> 00:21:04,328
during the wrestling match.
376
00:21:06,266 --> 00:21:09,233
- George, we're sorry
we abandoned you.
377
00:21:09,402 --> 00:21:10,301
- Well, that's okay.
378
00:21:11,304 --> 00:21:13,170
One of the seven tenets
of Ye Olde Apple Days
379
00:21:13,339 --> 00:21:14,538
is forgiveness.
380
00:21:14,707 --> 00:21:16,540
- You're a good man, George.
381
00:21:16,709 --> 00:21:18,409
- Oh, Steph, you were right.
382
00:21:18,578 --> 00:21:20,244
They thought our show was over.
383
00:21:20,413 --> 00:21:23,314
Okay, folks, let me explain
the concept of intermission.
384
00:21:24,950 --> 00:21:28,719
- Michael, they left because
they didn't like your show.
385
00:21:28,888 --> 00:21:30,788
- Didn't like my show?
386
00:21:30,956 --> 00:21:33,023
- How'd they feel about
my demure smiling?
387
00:21:34,627 --> 00:21:36,360
- They, they didn't say.
388
00:21:36,562 --> 00:21:39,397
- They usually don't say
anything when they're pleased.
389
00:21:39,565 --> 00:21:40,564
- How--how could they
prefer this
390
00:21:41,668 --> 00:21:42,933
when my show had glitz,
glamour, production values?
391
00:21:43,102 --> 00:21:45,869
- Michael, this isn't Las Vegas.
392
00:21:46,038 --> 00:21:47,605
- It never will be as long as
people dunk their heads
393
00:21:47,774 --> 00:21:49,473
in tubs of water.
394
00:21:49,642 --> 00:21:52,743
- Well, you're welcome
to join the celebration.
395
00:21:52,912 --> 00:21:54,378
- Well, thanks, George.
396
00:21:54,547 --> 00:21:56,681
I guess you know your audience
a little better than I do.
397
00:21:56,849 --> 00:21:58,349
- You must feel bad about
398
00:21:58,518 --> 00:22:00,851
everybody walking out
on your show.
399
00:22:01,020 --> 00:22:02,886
- I'd feel worse
if we had a refund policy.
400
00:22:05,891 --> 00:22:08,158
- Have you ever bobbed
for apples?
401
00:22:08,361 --> 00:22:12,262
- No, but in college,
I-I did have my head dunked...
402
00:22:12,432 --> 00:22:13,464
but it wasn't in a tub.
403
00:22:15,368 --> 00:22:17,435
And they,
they weren't apples.
404
00:22:20,340 --> 00:22:21,572
- Could I, cupcake?
405
00:22:21,741 --> 00:22:23,541
- All right, as long as
you don't get your hair wet.
406
00:22:23,710 --> 00:22:24,675
- I'll be careful.
407
00:22:24,844 --> 00:22:26,811
[PHONE RINGS]
408
00:22:31,818 --> 00:22:34,251
- Hello.
- Hi. This is Larry.
409
00:22:34,420 --> 00:22:35,353
Next to me is my--
410
00:22:35,521 --> 00:22:36,620
- Where are you now?
411
00:22:37,890 --> 00:22:38,723
- Graceland.
412
00:22:38,891 --> 00:22:40,491
Home of the king
of rock 'n roll.
413
00:22:42,795 --> 00:22:45,529
- Graceland. That's...
that's in Memphis.
414
00:22:45,698 --> 00:22:47,865
- I know.
Our walkathon is completed.
415
00:22:48,033 --> 00:22:49,834
Your pledge has provided us
with adequate funds
416
00:22:50,002 --> 00:22:51,569
to purchase the swamp...
417
00:22:51,738 --> 00:22:52,703
and with enough left over
418
00:22:52,872 --> 00:22:55,740
to buy a 9 x 12
Colonel Tom Parker area rug.
419
00:22:58,878 --> 00:23:01,912
- That's...
that's 1,400 miles.
420
00:23:03,549 --> 00:23:06,484
- Gotta go. Darryl just won
an impromptu look-alike contest
421
00:23:06,652 --> 00:23:08,519
and we gotta help him
divvy up the babes.
422
00:23:13,025 --> 00:23:14,024
Bye!
423
00:23:23,102 --> 00:23:24,802
- That's $1,400!
424
00:23:31,176 --> 00:23:34,177
[APPLAUSE]
425
00:23:37,016 --> 00:23:40,017
[♪♪♪]
426
00:24:05,845 --> 00:24:06,977
- Meow.
31556
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