Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:57,155
And how-- How many were there?
2
00:00:57,190 --> 00:00:59,123
Forty-five to fifty.
3
00:00:59,158 --> 00:01:01,125
Forty-five to fifty ants?
4
00:01:01,328 --> 00:01:02,860
Correct.
5
00:01:02,896 --> 00:01:04,629
All-- All on one cracker?
6
00:01:05,665 --> 00:01:07,732
That's right.
7
00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:10,968
Well, that's certainly all
we'll ever wanna know
8
00:01:11,004 --> 00:01:14,339
about our third-world neighbors.
9
00:01:14,674 --> 00:01:18,009
Thank you, Dr. Marquette, for
being on the show.
10
00:01:19,679 --> 00:01:21,846
And we're clear.
11
00:01:21,882 --> 00:01:23,882
Great show, Dr. Marquette.
12
00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:24,716
You know, you really--
13
00:01:25,652 --> 00:01:26,951
Hi, Bev. What did you
think of the show?
14
00:01:26,986 --> 00:01:29,587
-I missed it. -Then, it was
one of my best.
15
00:01:29,623 --> 00:01:32,424
Listen, I'm gonna be out of
town for a few days.
16
00:01:32,459 --> 00:01:33,558
The station owner just called.
17
00:01:33,593 --> 00:01:36,027
He has to, uh, miss the TV
marketplace convention,
18
00:01:36,062 --> 00:01:37,495
so I gotta go in his place.
19
00:01:37,497 --> 00:01:39,997
What-- What's the TV
marketplace convention?
20
00:01:40,033 --> 00:01:43,401
Dick, try to learn something
about the industry you work in.
21
00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:45,237
That's where we buy old TV shows
22
00:01:45,272 --> 00:01:46,505
and put them in our
new fall lineup.
23
00:01:46,507 --> 00:01:52,744
Oh, sort of out with the old
and in with the old.
24
00:01:53,647 --> 00:01:55,647
A word of advice, Bev. If I were
you, I'd stay away
25
00:01:55,682 --> 00:01:57,882
from that colorized version
of Father Knows Best .
26
00:01:57,917 --> 00:01:59,083
I heard Bud turned out green.
27
00:02:00,888 --> 00:02:02,821
I'll make a note.
28
00:02:02,856 --> 00:02:04,890
Oh, uh, is there anything I can
for you while you're gone?
29
00:02:04,925 --> 00:02:06,625
Water your plants?
Feed your fish?
30
00:02:06,660 --> 00:02:08,693
Read to your dog?
31
00:02:08,729 --> 00:02:10,595
Everything is taken care of.
32
00:02:10,631 --> 00:02:12,831
All I have to do is cancel my
Ranger Girls meeting.
33
00:02:12,866 --> 00:02:16,935
Well, cancel that cancellation.
I can handle that scout thing.
34
00:02:16,970 --> 00:02:19,203
I don't mean to toot my own
horn, but you're, uh--
35
00:02:19,239 --> 00:02:20,805
You're looking at a
former Webelo.
36
00:02:21,475 --> 00:02:23,775
You know, Michael, you're
impressing the hell out of us.
37
00:02:25,345 --> 00:02:28,746
These are Ranger Girls, Michael.
It has to be a woman.
38
00:02:28,781 --> 00:02:29,480
Well, then, let me be the one
39
00:02:30,350 --> 00:02:31,016
to find you a
substitute troop leader.
40
00:02:32,319 --> 00:02:34,052
It's not that simple, Michael.
We have activities planned.
41
00:02:34,087 --> 00:02:36,688
Bev, no problemo .
I've got the perfect person.
42
00:02:36,723 --> 00:02:38,489
Joanna! Right, Dick?
43
00:02:38,992 --> 00:02:42,293
Michael, there--
there might be a problemo .
44
00:02:42,328 --> 00:02:45,196
Michael, you can't just
volunteer someone
45
00:02:45,231 --> 00:02:46,864
without asking them first.
46
00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:49,133
Well, you can if it's for a good
cause, which this is.
47
00:02:49,168 --> 00:02:51,435
Anyway, only a louse would turn
down the Ranger Girls,
48
00:02:51,471 --> 00:02:52,671
and Joanna's not a louse.
49
00:02:52,706 --> 00:02:54,539
Is she, Dick?
50
00:02:54,574 --> 00:02:56,374
Of course not.
51
00:02:56,409 --> 00:02:57,108
Then, it's settled.
52
00:02:57,143 --> 00:02:58,242
No, it isn't.
53
00:02:58,645 --> 00:03:01,479
Look, Michael, I'll get you a
list of the girls' names
54
00:03:01,514 --> 00:03:02,246
and phone numbers.
55
00:03:03,316 --> 00:03:04,449
Either get a substitute or
call them and cancel.
56
00:03:04,484 --> 00:03:06,717
Will do, Bev.
57
00:03:06,752 --> 00:03:07,719
So, Dick--
58
00:03:07,754 --> 00:03:10,421
No way, Michael. You ask Joanna.
59
00:03:10,456 --> 00:03:12,724
But, Dick, you know how to
manipulate her.
60
00:03:12,759 --> 00:03:14,291
You talked her into marrying
you, didn't you?
61
00:03:31,478 --> 00:03:35,146
Well, what do you think?
62
00:03:35,181 --> 00:03:38,215
I thi-- I think it's-- it's a
nice piece of wood, George.
63
00:03:38,217 --> 00:03:41,319
Thanks, Dick. It's my first
shot at carving.
64
00:03:41,355 --> 00:03:43,555
I was always pretty good
at pointy sticks,
65
00:03:43,590 --> 00:03:45,990
but who would have thought
I had this in me?
66
00:03:48,462 --> 00:03:53,130
You're another, um, guy
who carves wood.
67
00:03:55,869 --> 00:03:57,569
What's-- What-- What is it?
68
00:03:57,604 --> 00:04:01,105
It's a miniature replica of Mt.
Rushmore.
69
00:04:05,278 --> 00:04:07,945
Who-- Who is this?
70
00:04:07,981 --> 00:04:09,481
That's you, Dick.
71
00:04:10,917 --> 00:04:12,683
They started out as presidents,
72
00:04:12,719 --> 00:04:16,287
but they came out looking more
like people I know.
73
00:04:16,323 --> 00:04:18,890
The one in the middle is Mr.
Green Jeans.
74
00:04:21,895 --> 00:04:23,061
Oh, honey, look.
75
00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:28,365
George has immortalized me in,
um, bark.
76
00:04:28,835 --> 00:04:30,768
It looks like Mt. Rushmore.
77
00:04:30,804 --> 00:04:32,504
Wow, I am good at this.
78
00:04:33,839 --> 00:04:35,973
Yeah, this is, uh--
This is Lincoln.
79
00:04:36,008 --> 00:04:39,411
And Jefferson and me and Mr.
Green Jeans.
80
00:04:40,646 --> 00:04:42,747
Very imaginative, George.
81
00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:44,248
Well, actually, it makes sense.
82
00:04:44,284 --> 00:04:46,918
If it-- If it weren't for the
problem of time and space,
83
00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:50,054
we would've all hung
out together.
84
00:04:51,457 --> 00:04:53,190
I was hoping you'd like it.
85
00:04:53,226 --> 00:04:58,629
You know, I'm gonna let you
put "Mt. Stratford"
86
00:04:59,966 --> 00:05:02,767
on display right
here in the inn.
87
00:05:02,803 --> 00:05:04,002
Oh, George, we couldn't do that.
88
00:05:04,037 --> 00:05:05,670
Yeah, we really couldn't.
89
00:05:07,540 --> 00:05:09,874
You don't have to thank me,
Dick.
90
00:05:09,909 --> 00:05:13,945
Boy, I can't wait to see
where you put it.
91
00:05:14,614 --> 00:05:16,380
Think of it this way, honey.
92
00:05:16,415 --> 00:05:18,048
If George were our
five-year-old son,
93
00:05:18,084 --> 00:05:19,317
we'd think this was pretty good.
94
00:05:19,352 --> 00:05:23,221
Yeah, but he's our
56-year-old handyman...
95
00:05:23,790 --> 00:05:26,591
...and it stinks.
96
00:05:26,626 --> 00:05:28,326
Hi, troops.
97
00:05:28,828 --> 00:05:31,028
Lovely 'do, Joanna.
98
00:05:31,063 --> 00:05:33,431
Oh, thank you, Michael.
99
00:05:33,466 --> 00:05:34,832
Say...
100
00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:37,669
How would you like to fill in
101
00:05:37,704 --> 00:05:39,637
as troop leader for
Bev's Ranger Girls
102
00:05:39,706 --> 00:05:40,638
while she's out of town?
103
00:05:40,673 --> 00:05:42,040
Troop leader?
104
00:05:42,075 --> 00:05:46,210
Yeah, this, uh, Webelo,
volunteered you without asking.
105
00:05:47,213 --> 00:05:49,346
Well, that might be fun and who
could turn down a good cause
106
00:05:49,382 --> 00:05:50,481
like the Ranger Girls?
107
00:05:50,516 --> 00:05:51,816
Sure, I'll do it.
108
00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:53,751
Gee, Dick, first you don't know
anything about the TV business,
109
00:05:53,786 --> 00:05:55,286
and then you don't know
anything about your woman.
110
00:05:55,321 --> 00:05:57,054
What gives?
111
00:05:57,957 --> 00:06:01,826
Michael, may I speak to
you for a moment?
112
00:06:02,161 --> 00:06:02,827
How could you?
113
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:05,462
I'm sorry, Steph, I--
114
00:06:05,498 --> 00:06:06,931
What did I do?
115
00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:10,367
You asked Joanna to take over
those Ranger Girls and not me.
116
00:06:10,403 --> 00:06:12,703
But, Steph, this
involves giving.
117
00:06:15,975 --> 00:06:17,642
I can be giving,
118
00:06:17,677 --> 00:06:21,212
especially if there's something
to be gotten in return.
119
00:06:21,247 --> 00:06:22,847
See, I give them an
hour with me,
120
00:06:22,882 --> 00:06:24,616
someone to pattern
their lives after,
121
00:06:24,651 --> 00:06:27,351
and in return, I get looked up
to and adored and worshipped
122
00:06:27,386 --> 00:06:29,654
and maybe some applause.
123
00:06:29,990 --> 00:06:31,422
Gee, Steph, you're
another Schweitzer.
124
00:06:31,457 --> 00:06:32,256
I know.
125
00:06:33,526 --> 00:06:35,193
Joanna...
126
00:06:36,329 --> 00:06:38,395
I'm-- I'm afraid I'm gonna have
to rescind that offer.
127
00:06:38,431 --> 00:06:41,199
I had no idea the A Team
was available.
128
00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:41,999
Stephanie?
129
00:06:42,035 --> 00:06:43,901
Don't feel bad, Joanna.
130
00:06:43,937 --> 00:06:46,204
Oh, Michael, I'm sure
Joanna understands.
131
00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:48,106
After all, I am much
closer to their age.
132
00:06:50,076 --> 00:06:52,844
I think I found a place for
George's sculpture.
133
00:06:52,879 --> 00:06:54,178
Honey!
134
00:06:57,283 --> 00:06:59,316
Dick, those are for the
Ranger Girls.
135
00:06:59,752 --> 00:07:01,920
Honey, it's never too early
for those girls
136
00:07:01,955 --> 00:07:05,190
to start learning to
watch their weight.
137
00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:11,695
Well?
138
00:07:11,731 --> 00:07:14,065
Stephanie, don't you think
you're a little overdressed
139
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:16,066
for a Ranger Girls' meeting?
140
00:07:16,102 --> 00:07:17,835
Joanna, if you knew so
much about this,
141
00:07:17,870 --> 00:07:20,638
don't you think you would've
been first choice?
142
00:07:23,309 --> 00:07:25,442
I'm going to go now.
143
00:07:26,412 --> 00:07:28,746
I can't wait for them to get
here and meet me.
144
00:07:28,781 --> 00:07:31,649
Imagine all those little girls'
lives peaking at once.
145
00:07:34,688 --> 00:07:39,356
Yeah, after you, all these
cookies will be a letdown.
146
00:07:43,596 --> 00:07:46,064
Well, here we are.
147
00:07:46,099 --> 00:07:49,333
Green girls, I'd like you to
meet Stephanie Vanderkellen,
148
00:07:49,369 --> 00:07:50,801
your incredible, wonderful,
149
00:07:50,836 --> 00:07:54,705
milk-skinned
goddess-like den muffin.
150
00:07:59,279 --> 00:08:00,378
Thank you.
151
00:08:00,413 --> 00:08:02,447
I'm only temporary, so don't
get your hopes up.
152
00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:10,622
Michael, you can leave now.
You're splitting their focus.
153
00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:20,898
Well, why don't I tell you a
little about me,
154
00:08:20,933 --> 00:08:24,168
and then we'll open the
floor to compliments.
155
00:08:26,372 --> 00:08:29,807
The first thing I wanna tell
you about myself is
156
00:08:29,842 --> 00:08:31,943
I hate your uniforms.
157
00:08:32,779 --> 00:08:34,512
Tell me who's forcing
you to wear them,
158
00:08:34,547 --> 00:08:36,380
and I'll make them stop.
159
00:08:37,150 --> 00:08:40,951
Nobody's forcing us. We
like our uniforms.
160
00:08:40,987 --> 00:08:41,719
Yeah.
161
00:08:41,754 --> 00:08:42,720
Yeah, we like 'em.
162
00:08:42,755 --> 00:08:44,188
But if you all dress alike,
163
00:08:44,224 --> 00:08:47,425
how can you tell whose fathers
make the most money?
164
00:08:49,396 --> 00:08:50,228
Who cares?
165
00:08:51,264 --> 00:08:54,999
In every group, there's
always a bad egg.
166
00:08:55,502 --> 00:08:58,836
Okay, you can start now with
that flood of questions
167
00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:00,705
about how to be more like me.
168
00:09:02,642 --> 00:09:05,410
Miss Dutton was gonna talk
about survival.
169
00:09:05,445 --> 00:09:07,545
Oh.
170
00:09:07,580 --> 00:09:09,580
Okay.
171
00:09:09,615 --> 00:09:11,915
Let's see.
172
00:09:12,752 --> 00:09:16,854
It's the night of your
coming-out party.
173
00:09:17,290 --> 00:09:21,259
Everything's perfect, you're
about to make your big entrance,
174
00:09:21,294 --> 00:09:26,197
when suddenly, without warning,
you break a nail.
175
00:09:26,866 --> 00:09:30,768
Miss Dutton was gonna talk
about outdoor survival.
176
00:09:30,803 --> 00:09:33,237
Ew, boring.
177
00:09:33,272 --> 00:09:34,972
You must be glad you
have a substitute.
178
00:09:36,942 --> 00:09:38,309
I wanted to hear about that.
179
00:09:38,344 --> 00:09:39,076
Yeah.
180
00:09:39,112 --> 00:09:40,077
Yeah.
181
00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:43,347
Okay, okay, okay.
182
00:09:44,617 --> 00:09:47,051
You're lost in the woods.
183
00:09:47,954 --> 00:09:51,756
You have no food, no
warm clothing,
184
00:09:51,791 --> 00:09:55,760
it's getting dark, and
you break a nail.
185
00:09:57,263 --> 00:09:58,329
Oh, man.
186
00:10:00,867 --> 00:10:02,399
I told you it was boring.
187
00:10:03,035 --> 00:10:05,669
Not when Miss Dutton does it.
188
00:10:05,705 --> 00:10:07,572
Well, she's not here. I am.
189
00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:10,341
We know.
190
00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:19,550
Well, I was sort of saving
this for the end,
191
00:10:19,585 --> 00:10:21,052
but how about if we draw?
192
00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:22,119
Okay!
193
00:10:22,154 --> 00:10:23,520
Yeah!
194
00:10:23,556 --> 00:10:25,355
Good.
195
00:10:25,391 --> 00:10:29,994
Now, which pose do you
like me in best?
196
00:10:31,263 --> 00:10:35,632
This one or this one?
197
00:10:38,871 --> 00:10:43,307
Miss Dutton didn't interview you
for this, did she?
198
00:10:43,342 --> 00:10:46,610
Well, at least the
snacks look decent.
199
00:10:49,082 --> 00:10:50,514
I think it's time to
call your parents.
200
00:10:50,516 --> 00:10:53,117
But we haven't had our
cookies and punch yet.
201
00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:57,788
You have to earn cookies and
punch, and you haven't tonight!
202
00:11:06,433 --> 00:11:07,365
Well?
203
00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:10,801
Did you put Mt. Stratford
on display yet?
204
00:11:10,837 --> 00:11:12,437
Sure did, George.
It's-- It's in here.
205
00:11:12,472 --> 00:11:14,805
Wow!
206
00:11:17,644 --> 00:11:22,546
Could you, uh, hot-and-cold me,
Dick?
207
00:11:26,385 --> 00:11:28,919
Right under your nose, George.
208
00:11:30,490 --> 00:11:31,856
Right here.
209
00:11:31,891 --> 00:11:35,126
Gee, Dick, it doesn't
exactly jump out at you.
210
00:11:37,063 --> 00:11:40,564
Well, you know, when you-- You
know, when you stand there,
211
00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:45,703
but, uh, when, you know-- When
you-- When you...
212
00:11:45,739 --> 00:11:49,306
...stand here, I mean, you--
you can't miss it.
213
00:11:55,114 --> 00:11:59,016
I'll try to find a better
place for it, George.
214
00:11:59,418 --> 00:12:03,254
All five of us would
appreciate it.
215
00:12:05,291 --> 00:12:06,791
Morning, Dick.
216
00:12:06,826 --> 00:12:09,760
Has anyone seen my
Leader of the Pack?
217
00:12:15,368 --> 00:12:18,803
Michael, how do you get your
tongue to say those things?
218
00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,208
So, Steph, how'd it go?
219
00:12:24,243 --> 00:12:27,478
Bet those kids have stiff necks
from all that looking up to you.
220
00:12:27,513 --> 00:12:28,712
It went fine, Michael.
221
00:12:28,747 --> 00:12:30,314
Great, well, if you thought you
had fun last night,
222
00:12:30,350 --> 00:12:32,783
wait 'til you hear what you
get to do next time.
223
00:12:32,818 --> 00:12:35,953
Sorry, Michael, I'm
busy next time.
224
00:12:35,988 --> 00:12:41,292
But, Steph, you, the kids:
cute-a-rama!
225
00:12:41,327 --> 00:12:42,126
If you don't come back,
226
00:12:43,029 --> 00:12:44,461
you'll break their
pre-pubescent hearts.
227
00:12:44,497 --> 00:12:45,663
How can you turn down
all those kids?
228
00:12:45,698 --> 00:12:47,231
The adoration, the worship,
the--?
229
00:12:47,266 --> 00:12:51,602
Okay, okay, okay! Maybe last
night wasn't perfect.
230
00:12:51,638 --> 00:12:53,137
In fact, it was a nightmare.
231
00:12:53,173 --> 00:12:55,439
It was an entire room of people
almost not liking me.
232
00:12:57,177 --> 00:12:59,276
They just sat there and stared.
233
00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:02,346
Well, there you go. That's a
classic symptom of awe.
234
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:05,349
Michael, I know awe.
235
00:13:05,385 --> 00:13:08,219
I live with awe every day,
and this wasn't it.
236
00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:09,820
But, Stephanie--
237
00:13:09,855 --> 00:13:11,021
Michael!
238
00:13:11,057 --> 00:13:12,256
I came this close to failure,
239
00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:15,092
and I'm not taking that
chance again.
240
00:13:18,031 --> 00:13:22,066
Dick, I just saw my lifestyle
flash before my eyes.
241
00:13:22,602 --> 00:13:26,703
You think you could ask Joanna
if she would fill in for Steph?
242
00:13:30,176 --> 00:13:33,377
Michael, does this answer
your question?
243
00:13:33,412 --> 00:13:34,579
[ Laughs ]
244
00:13:45,458 --> 00:13:47,558
Knockout sweater, Joanna.
245
00:13:47,593 --> 00:13:48,559
What do you want, Michael?
246
00:13:48,594 --> 00:13:49,794
Well, I was thinking,
247
00:13:51,030 --> 00:13:51,729
since you wanted to guest-host
those Ranger Girls so much,
248
00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:54,031
it's only fair you and
Steph take turns.
249
00:13:54,066 --> 00:13:56,233
Stephanie doesn't wanna do
it again, right?
250
00:13:56,268 --> 00:13:58,001
Purely a coincidence.
251
00:13:58,037 --> 00:13:59,704
Michael, after the way
you treated me,
252
00:13:59,739 --> 00:14:03,040
I'm not doing you any
more favors.
253
00:14:03,609 --> 00:14:10,247
You're absolutely right. Hit me,
kick me, hurt me, I deserve it.
254
00:14:11,217 --> 00:14:15,819
But is it fair that those cute,
255
00:14:15,854 --> 00:14:18,623
innocent Rangerettes
should suffer?
256
00:14:18,658 --> 00:14:20,992
All right, Michael, I'll do it
for the girls' sake.
257
00:14:21,027 --> 00:14:22,693
Oh, great, Joanna, you're
in for a treat.
258
00:14:22,728 --> 00:14:25,529
Those Ranger Girls are having an
overnighter this Saturday.
259
00:14:25,564 --> 00:14:27,197
That sounds like fun.
260
00:14:27,233 --> 00:14:29,633
Michael, you didn't tell me it
was an overnighter.
261
00:14:29,668 --> 00:14:32,069
I was always the hit of
everyone's slumber parties.
262
00:14:32,104 --> 00:14:33,603
They'd have to like me.
263
00:14:33,639 --> 00:14:34,804
Okay, Michael, I'll do it.
264
00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:37,107
Terrif, Steph. Let's make plans.
265
00:14:37,143 --> 00:14:38,142
Sorry, Jo.
266
00:14:39,412 --> 00:14:41,379
But if Steph changes her mind,
you'll be the first to know.
267
00:14:48,521 --> 00:14:50,988
You're not gonna put it there?
268
00:14:51,023 --> 00:14:51,956
I promised George.
269
00:14:51,991 --> 00:14:54,625
But it ruins the whole inn.
270
00:14:57,496 --> 00:15:00,364
Wow! What a great place for it.
271
00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:06,203
Gee, Dick, thanks. It
makes the whole inn.
272
00:15:07,473 --> 00:15:09,307
Yeah, we were-- We were
just sort of--
273
00:15:09,342 --> 00:15:10,408
Sort of saying the same thing.
274
00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:14,945
Boy, now I feel really lousy
about what I have to say.
275
00:15:14,980 --> 00:15:16,313
What is it?
276
00:15:16,348 --> 00:15:18,916
It's just that I'm so proud
of Mt. Stratford,
277
00:15:18,951 --> 00:15:21,018
I'd like to look at it
all the time.
278
00:15:21,053 --> 00:15:23,787
Would you mind very much if I
kept it in my room?
279
00:15:23,822 --> 00:15:26,457
Gee, I don't know, George.
280
00:15:29,395 --> 00:15:32,062
It's gonna be tough getting used
to the-- to the inn without it.
281
00:15:32,097 --> 00:15:33,831
But we'll adjust.
282
00:15:33,866 --> 00:15:35,265
Oh, you two.
283
00:15:35,300 --> 00:15:37,468
Did I think I'd just leave
you in the lurch?
284
00:15:37,503 --> 00:15:39,870
You didn't make another one?
285
00:15:39,905 --> 00:15:42,473
I tried, Dick, but I
couldn't duplicate it.
286
00:15:42,508 --> 00:15:44,408
But I did make you this.
287
00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:54,684
The Statue of Liberty with
Bea Arthur's face.
288
00:15:56,756 --> 00:15:58,889
Picture this on the front lawn.
289
00:15:59,292 --> 00:16:02,126
Here you go, Dick.
290
00:16:05,264 --> 00:16:06,230
Wow.
291
00:16:06,265 --> 00:16:09,633
I never saw them
together before.
292
00:16:09,668 --> 00:16:13,471
I hate to ask, but c--?
293
00:16:13,939 --> 00:16:16,707
You guys!
294
00:16:24,050 --> 00:16:27,585
Well, Dick, here it is. I got
all the tykes' grub.
295
00:16:28,854 --> 00:16:33,390
By the way, your half of the
bill comes to 22 dollars.
296
00:16:36,495 --> 00:16:38,796
Okay, Dick, but when Bev
asks if you helped,
297
00:16:38,831 --> 00:16:41,331
I'm showing her this.
298
00:16:44,570 --> 00:16:47,471
Well, how do I look?
299
00:16:48,274 --> 00:16:50,474
Steph, you could put
Sleeping Beauty to shame.
300
00:16:50,943 --> 00:16:53,444
She's not real.
301
00:16:54,213 --> 00:16:55,646
Well, then, who's that
gorgeous actress
302
00:16:55,681 --> 00:16:56,814
you're so much prettier than?
303
00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:58,082
-Jessica Lange? -That's the one.
304
00:16:58,117 --> 00:17:00,084
Oh, Michael, you always say
the perfect thing.
305
00:17:00,119 --> 00:17:00,784
[ Chuckles ]
306
00:17:00,819 --> 00:17:01,452
[ Sighs ]
307
00:17:03,755 --> 00:17:05,089
I can't wait.
308
00:17:05,124 --> 00:17:06,990
[ Excited chatter ]
309
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:07,991
I can't wait.
310
00:17:11,096 --> 00:17:13,663
You girls have a lot to learn
about slumber parties.
311
00:17:14,867 --> 00:17:18,068
What slumber party? We're
going on a campout.
312
00:17:18,104 --> 00:17:19,503
Yeah, a campout.
313
00:17:19,539 --> 00:17:22,005
Whoa, Steph. Crossed wires.
314
00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:23,139
Who would've thought anyone
would've planned
315
00:17:23,175 --> 00:17:24,675
to spend an overnighter outside?
316
00:17:24,710 --> 00:17:27,177
We're still gonna get to go,
aren't we?
317
00:17:27,213 --> 00:17:29,279
Miss Dutton promised us.
318
00:17:29,314 --> 00:17:32,649
Steph, we're talking about a
promise to a-- a little child.
319
00:17:32,685 --> 00:17:35,052
And a big boss.
320
00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:37,787
Michael, unless you plan
to build a dome
321
00:17:37,823 --> 00:17:39,423
over the wilderness--
322
00:17:39,792 --> 00:17:41,124
Please take us.
323
00:17:41,160 --> 00:17:41,859
Sorry.
324
00:17:42,828 --> 00:17:43,994
If you were camping any
place but outdoors--
325
00:17:44,029 --> 00:17:45,629
Can't you make her take us?
326
00:17:45,664 --> 00:17:48,766
Haven't you been watching the
last five minutes?
327
00:17:49,368 --> 00:17:51,868
This is the worst
night of my life.
328
00:17:51,904 --> 00:17:54,238
You said that the last time
we were with her.
329
00:17:54,273 --> 00:17:56,607
I've been waiting my
whole life for this.
330
00:17:56,642 --> 00:17:59,009
It probably wouldn't have
been as much fun
331
00:17:59,045 --> 00:18:00,477
as we imagined anyway.
332
00:18:00,513 --> 00:18:02,913
Okay, okay, okay.
333
00:18:02,948 --> 00:18:04,214
You'll do it, Steph?
334
00:18:04,249 --> 00:18:05,549
I have to. I'm out-pouted.
335
00:18:05,585 --> 00:18:06,683
Yay!
336
00:18:06,719 --> 00:18:07,451
Yeah!
337
00:18:07,486 --> 00:18:09,086
All right!
338
00:18:09,121 --> 00:18:12,422
Don't get too excited. It's
still with her.
339
00:18:17,230 --> 00:18:18,028
Ew!
340
00:18:18,063 --> 00:18:18,862
Ick!
341
00:18:18,898 --> 00:18:21,031
Ew, ew, ew!
342
00:18:21,833 --> 00:18:24,635
Whoa, Steph. New record.
343
00:18:24,670 --> 00:18:27,037
Are you sure we can't go
further into the woods?
344
00:18:27,072 --> 00:18:29,373
Yeah, I can still see the
inn from here.
345
00:18:29,408 --> 00:18:31,508
Hey, this is a great spot.
346
00:18:31,844 --> 00:18:34,511
And look, Star light,
Star bright,
347
00:18:34,546 --> 00:18:36,279
First star I see tonight.
348
00:18:36,315 --> 00:18:38,681
That's the porch light.
349
00:18:39,852 --> 00:18:42,986
Oh, my God. We forgot the
electric blanket.
350
00:18:43,322 --> 00:18:44,187
I'm sorry, Steph.
351
00:18:45,224 --> 00:18:45,722
I hooked together every
extension cord in the inn,
352
00:18:46,392 --> 00:18:47,191
and they still wouldn't reach.
353
00:18:47,226 --> 00:18:49,493
Shouldn't he be leaving?
354
00:18:49,528 --> 00:18:50,226
No.
355
00:18:50,262 --> 00:18:51,928
It's no boys allowed.
356
00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:54,731
I think it's, like, a-- a
state law or something.
357
00:18:54,967 --> 00:18:58,868
Wow. These tots know
their torts.
358
00:18:58,904 --> 00:19:01,538
Well, I'd better, uh, vamoose
359
00:19:01,573 --> 00:19:02,639
or we could be
spending our weekends
360
00:19:02,675 --> 00:19:04,174
kissing through wire mesh.
361
00:19:04,209 --> 00:19:05,442
Michael!
362
00:19:05,477 --> 00:19:07,077
Good night. Sleep tight.
363
00:19:07,112 --> 00:19:10,414
Don't let the bed bu--
Good night, Steph.
364
00:19:14,486 --> 00:19:15,786
Porch light, Porch bright,
365
00:19:15,821 --> 00:19:18,321
please bring Michael
back tonight.
366
00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:22,892
Stupid, stupid porch light.
367
00:19:22,928 --> 00:19:24,695
[ Owl hoots ]
368
00:19:24,730 --> 00:19:25,929
What was that?
369
00:19:25,964 --> 00:19:27,264
Just an owl.
370
00:19:27,299 --> 00:19:28,699
Well, tell it to stop.
371
00:19:28,734 --> 00:19:31,335
Stop, owl.
372
00:19:31,370 --> 00:19:35,305
Well, it's never going to stop
if you're sarcastic with it.
373
00:19:35,908 --> 00:19:38,742
You've never been outside at
night before, have you?
374
00:19:38,777 --> 00:19:42,079
I have, too. I mean,
sunroofs count, right?
375
00:19:43,181 --> 00:19:44,948
Come on, let's go sit by the--
376
00:19:44,984 --> 00:19:46,917
Fire!
377
00:19:47,486 --> 00:19:48,952
We made it.
378
00:19:50,656 --> 00:19:51,922
I knew that.
379
00:19:52,691 --> 00:19:55,326
Are you being bad or something?
380
00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:57,294
No, it's a campfire.
381
00:19:57,330 --> 00:19:58,562
For campout.
382
00:19:58,597 --> 00:20:01,531
Aren't you going to sit down?
383
00:20:01,734 --> 00:20:03,834
I'm the leader. I think
I should stand.
384
00:20:03,869 --> 00:20:07,571
Okay, but you might get some
fire ashes in your hair.
385
00:20:08,541 --> 00:20:13,276
Ew, when was the last time these
woods were cleaned?
386
00:20:15,014 --> 00:20:20,483
So, what sort of activities do
you usually do on these outings?
387
00:20:20,519 --> 00:20:22,453
It's your job to pick.
388
00:20:22,488 --> 00:20:24,354
I was afraid of that.
389
00:20:24,389 --> 00:20:27,023
Well, since I don't seem to be
real good at that,
390
00:20:27,059 --> 00:20:29,760
according to you, why don't you
pick the activity?
391
00:20:29,795 --> 00:20:30,760
Okay.
392
00:20:30,796 --> 00:20:32,262
Okay, yeah.
393
00:20:32,298 --> 00:20:35,498
I know! Tell ghost stories.
394
00:20:35,534 --> 00:20:36,533
Yeah!
395
00:20:36,568 --> 00:20:37,201
All right!
396
00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:38,168
Okay.
397
00:20:38,204 --> 00:20:40,837
I'll go first.
398
00:20:42,007 --> 00:20:48,312
It was a night just like this,
exactly 20 years ago,
399
00:20:48,347 --> 00:20:49,212
when the headless--
400
00:20:49,247 --> 00:20:51,715
Okay, that was fun.
401
00:20:52,417 --> 00:20:54,451
Let's do something else.
Anything.
402
00:20:54,486 --> 00:20:55,852
Marshmallows are ready.
403
00:20:55,887 --> 00:20:57,387
Here's one for you,
Miss Vanderkellen.
404
00:20:57,423 --> 00:20:59,355
Why waste it on her?
She won't eat it.
405
00:21:00,158 --> 00:21:02,960
Wait a minute. Don't jump
to conclusions.
406
00:21:02,995 --> 00:21:05,462
I'll- I'll hold the stick.
407
00:21:05,497 --> 00:21:06,430
Wow.
408
00:21:29,889 --> 00:21:31,621
There.
409
00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:33,857
You have a little goo
on your cheek.
410
00:21:36,227 --> 00:21:39,529
I know. I can leave it on.
411
00:21:39,564 --> 00:21:41,865
There. That's long enough.
412
00:21:43,235 --> 00:21:46,436
Makeup? On a camping trip?
413
00:21:46,471 --> 00:21:50,307
Don't tell me I don't know
about survival.
414
00:21:51,977 --> 00:21:56,179
How do you do that? Without
making it go all over?
415
00:21:56,215 --> 00:22:00,351
Well, with lips as perfect
as mine, it's easy.
416
00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:02,986
Yours aren't half bad.
417
00:22:03,022 --> 00:22:05,856
My mother says I'm too
young to wear makeup.
418
00:22:05,891 --> 00:22:08,158
Your mother's wrong.
419
00:22:09,194 --> 00:22:09,993
Oh!
420
00:22:10,029 --> 00:22:10,994
Oh, me!
421
00:22:11,030 --> 00:22:11,862
Me, please!
422
00:22:11,897 --> 00:22:13,597
I want some makeup!
423
00:22:13,632 --> 00:22:15,732
I'm next!
424
00:22:16,435 --> 00:22:18,501
[ Owl hoots ]
425
00:22:18,537 --> 00:22:19,803
[ Laugh ]
426
00:22:27,112 --> 00:22:28,511
Psst.
427
00:22:30,582 --> 00:22:33,283
Michael, what are
you doing here?
428
00:22:33,319 --> 00:22:35,785
I've been within blood-curdling
scream distance all night.
429
00:22:36,288 --> 00:22:37,954
I almost ran off when I
saw that fire.
430
00:22:39,425 --> 00:22:40,957
I did it, Michael.
431
00:22:40,992 --> 00:22:43,226
They loved me just like
they're supposed to.
432
00:22:43,262 --> 00:22:45,028
Maybe even a little more.
433
00:22:45,063 --> 00:22:46,029
Great, Steph.
434
00:22:46,064 --> 00:22:47,631
Well, since things are
going so swimmingly,
435
00:22:47,666 --> 00:22:48,565
I guess you don't need me
436
00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:50,334
crouching out in the
bushes all night.
437
00:22:50,369 --> 00:22:51,735
Get real, Michael.
438
00:23:05,517 --> 00:23:07,250
Hi ho.
439
00:23:08,020 --> 00:23:12,422
Michael, you look like Mother
Nature spit on you.
440
00:23:13,291 --> 00:23:15,225
I spent the night crouching
out in the bushes
441
00:23:15,260 --> 00:23:17,994
keeping an eye on Steph
and the kids.
442
00:23:18,430 --> 00:23:19,829
Say, Joanna, you wouldn't
happen to have
443
00:23:19,865 --> 00:23:21,565
anything for a hungry hombre,
would you?
444
00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:23,166
I have some French
toast right here.
445
00:23:23,201 --> 00:23:26,069
Oh, yum. My tongue
has goosebumps.
446
00:23:26,104 --> 00:23:28,972
Oh, honey, I-- I sort
of wanted that.
447
00:23:29,007 --> 00:23:30,406
Sorry, Michael.
448
00:23:30,442 --> 00:23:33,977
I didn't know the A
Team was hungry.
32219
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof