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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,101 --> 00:00:04,102 ( theme music playing ) 2 00:00:56,422 --> 00:01:00,358 - HONEY, WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS? 3 00:01:00,393 --> 00:01:01,726 - HONEY, JUST A SECOND. 4 00:01:01,761 --> 00:01:04,196 I'M RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF DECIDING 5 00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:05,763 WHAT MY NEXT BOOK WILL BE. 6 00:01:05,799 --> 00:01:07,132 - OH, WELL, WHAT ARE THE CHOICES? 7 00:01:07,167 --> 00:01:10,602 - WELL, IT'S EITHER "YOU AND YOUR AUTOMOTIVE FLUIDS" 8 00:01:12,438 --> 00:01:14,038 OR "GROUTING WITHOUT POUTING." 9 00:01:16,376 --> 00:01:19,076 YOU KNOW, I CAN'T STAND THE THOUGHT OF ALL THOSE UNHAPPY GROUTERS, 10 00:01:19,112 --> 00:01:23,180 SO, WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU? 11 00:01:23,216 --> 00:01:24,783 - FIRST, DO YOU LIKE THIS DRESS? 12 00:01:24,818 --> 00:01:26,150 - YEAH. 13 00:01:26,186 --> 00:01:29,120 - SECOND, WHEN I WEAR THIS DRESS ON OUR ANNIVERSARY NEXT WEEK, 14 00:01:29,155 --> 00:01:30,589 WHERE WILL YOU BE TAKING ME? 15 00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:34,292 - DINNER AND A MOVIE? 16 00:01:34,328 --> 00:01:36,895 - DICK, THAT DOESN'T SOUND VERY ROMANTIC. 17 00:01:36,930 --> 00:01:37,862 - OH. 18 00:01:42,669 --> 00:01:46,571 HOW ABOUT (with French accent) DINNER AND A MOVIE? 19 00:01:48,542 --> 00:01:51,909 - HONEY, YOU KNOW I LIKE OUR ANNIVERSARIES TO BE SPECIAL, 20 00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:54,279 AFTER THE UNROMANTIC WEDDING WE HAD. 21 00:01:54,314 --> 00:01:55,280 - WHAT WAS WRONG WITH OUR WEDDING? 22 00:01:55,382 --> 00:01:57,315 IT WAS SHORT, IT WAS CHEAP, AND IT WAS LEGAL. 23 00:01:58,818 --> 00:02:01,485 - DICK, WE GOT MARRIED WITH TWO OTHER COUPLES. 24 00:02:02,855 --> 00:02:04,723 - WELL, YOU SAID YOU WANTED A BIG WEDDING. 25 00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:09,360 - HONEY, WE COULDN'T WAIT FOR A PRIVATE CEREMONY. 26 00:02:09,396 --> 00:02:10,394 WE HAD A PLANE TO CATCH 27 00:02:10,430 --> 00:02:11,529 OR OTHERWISE WE WOULD HAVE MISSED OUT 28 00:02:11,565 --> 00:02:14,131 ON THE SUPER SAVER DISCOUNT. 29 00:02:15,068 --> 00:02:18,537 - HEY, THAT'S WHAT WE SHOULD DO ON OUR ANNIVERSARY. 30 00:02:18,572 --> 00:02:20,638 - WHAT, TAKE A CHEAP FLIGHT SOMEWHERE? 31 00:02:20,673 --> 00:02:23,141 - NO, GET MARRIED. 32 00:02:23,176 --> 00:02:24,676 - HONEY, WE ARE MARRIED. 33 00:02:24,711 --> 00:02:27,912 - NO, I MEAN, WE COULD RESTATE OUR VOWS. 34 00:02:27,948 --> 00:02:28,946 - YOU'RE KIDDING. 35 00:02:30,249 --> 00:02:31,649 - NO, I'M NOT. 36 00:02:31,685 --> 00:02:33,851 - WELL, THAT'S FOOLISH. 37 00:02:33,887 --> 00:02:34,852 ( laughing ) 38 00:02:34,888 --> 00:02:36,087 - FOOLISH? 39 00:02:36,122 --> 00:02:40,792 - WELL, NOT FOOLISH, MORE LIKE SILLY. 40 00:02:42,495 --> 00:02:44,963 - YES, I GUESS IT IS SILLY. 41 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,231 I GOT CHEATED OUT OF A REAL WEDDING THE FIRST TIME. 42 00:02:47,267 --> 00:02:49,300 I WANTED TO DO IT RIGHT FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE. 43 00:02:49,336 --> 00:02:52,903 I GUESS TO SOME PEOPLE, THAT'S SILLY. 44 00:02:54,274 --> 00:02:56,408 - WELL, TO HELL WITH THOSE PEOPLE. 45 00:02:59,446 --> 00:03:02,313 IF THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ON YOUR ANNIVERSARY, 46 00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:03,915 THEN THAT'S WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO. 47 00:03:03,950 --> 00:03:05,917 - OH, DICK, YOU'RE WONDERFUL. 48 00:03:05,952 --> 00:03:07,719 I'M GONNA BREAK OUT THAT BOTTLE OF CHAMPAGNE 49 00:03:07,754 --> 00:03:10,154 SO WE CAN TOAST OUR NEW ENGAGEMENT. 50 00:03:10,189 --> 00:03:13,557 - OH, THAT'S A GOOD IDEA 'CAUSE I'VE BEEN SAVING THAT... 51 00:03:14,694 --> 00:03:16,360 FOR A SILLY OCCASION. 52 00:03:28,708 --> 00:03:32,343 - HONEY, IS THAT YOUR FOOT? 53 00:03:34,147 --> 00:03:37,182 - HOW'S MY FIANCE THIS MORNING? 54 00:03:39,986 --> 00:03:43,387 - FOR ONE THING, HE'D LIKE HIS SOCKS PULLED BACK UP. 55 00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:48,759 - THANKS. 56 00:03:48,795 --> 00:03:50,595 - GOOD MORNING. - HI. 57 00:03:58,805 --> 00:04:01,072 - PASS THE SUGAR, CUTE-UMS. 58 00:04:04,478 --> 00:04:07,312 - I THINK THAT'S YOU, DICK. 59 00:04:07,347 --> 00:04:09,013 - OH, RIGHT. 60 00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:15,119 - HI, STEPHANIE. 61 00:04:15,154 --> 00:04:17,655 HONEY, SHOULD WE TELL THEM THE BIG NEWS? 62 00:04:17,690 --> 00:04:20,057 - I DON'T CARE. 63 00:04:20,093 --> 00:04:21,759 - WE'RE GETTING MARRIED AGAIN. 64 00:04:21,794 --> 00:04:24,562 - OOH! 65 00:04:24,597 --> 00:04:28,433 - GEE, DICK, I'M NOT SURE BUT I THINK THAT'S BIGAMY. 66 00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:33,571 - YOU KNOW, HONEY, GEORGE MAY HAVE SOMETHING THERE. 67 00:04:33,606 --> 00:04:36,240 - GEORGE, WE'RE JUST RESTATING OUR VOWS. 68 00:04:36,275 --> 00:04:38,509 IT'S LIKE A PUBLIC AFFIRMATION OF OUR LOVE. 69 00:04:38,544 --> 00:04:39,477 - WHEN'S THE BIG EVENT? 70 00:04:39,512 --> 00:04:42,080 - NEXT SATURDAY ON OUR ANNIVERSARY. 71 00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:44,048 - JOANNA, YOU'RE NOT GIVING YOUR MAID OF HONOR 72 00:04:44,084 --> 00:04:45,683 VERY MUCH NOTICE. 73 00:04:45,719 --> 00:04:48,319 - HOW DID YOU KNOW I WANTED YOU TO BE MY MAID OF HONOR? 74 00:04:48,355 --> 00:04:50,454 - I'M ALWAYS MAID OF HONOR. 75 00:04:50,490 --> 00:04:52,022 WELL, NOT ALWAYS. 76 00:04:52,058 --> 00:04:54,492 SOMETIMES THE BRIDE IS AFRAID THE GROOM WILL CHANGE HIS MIND 77 00:04:54,527 --> 00:04:56,660 AND PROPOSE TO ME. 78 00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:03,100 - DICK, I KNOW I PROBABLY DON'T DESERVE IT 79 00:05:03,136 --> 00:05:04,135 AND IT'S A LOT TO ASK 80 00:05:04,170 --> 00:05:06,871 AND YOU PROBABLY HAVE OTHER PEOPLE IN MIND 81 00:05:06,907 --> 00:05:10,975 BUT COULD I BE YOUR BEST MAN? 82 00:05:11,011 --> 00:05:13,511 - WHAT THE HEY. 83 00:05:18,218 --> 00:05:19,184 - DICK. 84 00:05:19,219 --> 00:05:20,885 - HONEY, HONEY, WAIT A SECOND. 85 00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:23,221 LET ME GET THIS DOWN, OTHERWISE I'LL FORGET IT. 86 00:05:23,256 --> 00:05:30,161 "IF WATER CONTINUES TO LEAK, YOU HAVE NOT GROUTED PROPERLY." 87 00:05:32,398 --> 00:05:33,297 YEAH, WHAT'S UP? 88 00:05:33,332 --> 00:05:35,367 - I GOT SOME DARLING WEDDING INVITATIONS 89 00:05:35,402 --> 00:05:36,701 AT PETERSON'S DRUGS AND STUFF 90 00:05:36,737 --> 00:05:38,970 SO I'LL NEED A LIST OF WHO YOU WANT TO INVITE. 91 00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:40,404 - UH, GEORGE. 92 00:05:42,208 --> 00:05:43,174 - THAT'S ALL? 93 00:05:43,209 --> 00:05:44,876 - AND YOU'RE INVITING STEPHANIE. 94 00:05:44,911 --> 00:05:47,479 - WE CAN'T HAVE A WEDDING WITH ONLY TWO GUESTS. 95 00:05:47,514 --> 00:05:50,681 - HONEY, I WAS HOPING TO KEEP THIS THING SMALL. 96 00:05:50,716 --> 00:05:51,649 - THIS THING? 97 00:05:53,252 --> 00:05:54,319 - YEAH, I SAY "THIS THING," 98 00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:58,222 YOU SAY "THIS PUBLIC AFFIRMATION OF OUR LOVE." 99 00:05:58,257 --> 00:06:00,992 POTATO, POT-AH-TO. 100 00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:03,027 - WELL, HONEY, I REALLY WANT TO SHARE THIS OCCASION 101 00:06:03,062 --> 00:06:04,529 WITH OUR FRIENDS. 102 00:06:04,564 --> 00:06:05,630 - WELL, HONEY, LET'S TRY TO KEEP IT 103 00:06:05,665 --> 00:06:08,232 TO OUR CLOSE INTIMATE FRIENDS. 104 00:06:08,268 --> 00:06:09,967 - WELL, SO FAR, IT'S JUST GEORGE, STEPHANIE 105 00:06:10,003 --> 00:06:11,536 AND THE PETERSONS. 106 00:06:11,571 --> 00:06:14,372 - THE PETERSONS? 107 00:06:14,407 --> 00:06:17,475 OF PETERSON'S DRUGS AND STUFF? 108 00:06:17,510 --> 00:06:19,009 - WELL, DICK, I KIND OF HAD TO ASK THEM, 109 00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:21,446 THEY SAW ME BUYING THE INVITATIONS. 110 00:06:24,951 --> 00:06:27,318 - DID ANYONE ELSE SEE YOU? 111 00:06:28,487 --> 00:06:29,386 - NO. 112 00:06:29,422 --> 00:06:31,155 - AND YOU WEREN'T FOLLOWED? 113 00:06:32,625 --> 00:06:36,427 - WE ALSO HAVE TO TALK ABOUT WHERE TO HAVE THE CEREMONY. 114 00:06:36,463 --> 00:06:40,098 I'VE ALWAYS PICTURED MY WEDDING IN A BEAUTIFUL CHAPEL. 115 00:06:40,133 --> 00:06:44,469 - I'VE ALWAYS PICTURED MINE IN THE LOBBY OF AN INN. 116 00:06:45,571 --> 00:06:47,471 - DICK, C'MON. I WANT TO DO THIS RIGHT. 117 00:06:47,507 --> 00:06:51,543 OH, AND I WOULD LOVE IT IF WE WROTE OUR OWN VOWS. 118 00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:54,011 - HONEY, I'M WRITING A BOOK. 119 00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:55,680 I MEAN, I DON'T THINK I CAN WRITE VOWS 120 00:06:55,715 --> 00:06:58,315 WITH MY HEAD FULL OF GROUT. 121 00:06:59,885 --> 00:07:03,487 - DICK, PLEASE, FOR ME? 122 00:07:03,523 --> 00:07:06,457 HOW MANY TIMES AM I GOING TO GET MARRIED? 123 00:07:06,492 --> 00:07:07,825 - AT THIS RATE? 124 00:07:10,563 --> 00:07:12,063 - HI, BRIDE. HI, GROOM. 125 00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:14,632 ( giggling ) 126 00:07:14,667 --> 00:07:15,866 - MICHAEL, HOW DID YOU KNOW? 127 00:07:15,902 --> 00:07:18,636 - YOU WERE TOPIC UNO AT PETERSON'S DRUGS AND STUFF. 128 00:07:18,671 --> 00:07:19,637 CONGRATS. 129 00:07:19,672 --> 00:07:21,338 - THANKS, MICHAEL. 130 00:07:22,909 --> 00:07:25,209 - WHOO! NICE CATCH, THERE, DICK. 131 00:07:26,846 --> 00:07:29,046 AND BY THE WAY, GREAT NEWS, 132 00:07:29,082 --> 00:07:33,784 I'M AVAILABLE TO BE YOUR BEST HOMBRE. 133 00:07:33,820 --> 00:07:38,155 - MICHAEL, THE POSITION OF BEST HOMBRE IS OCCUPADO. 134 00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:41,258 GEORGE IS GONNA BE MY BEST MAN. 135 00:07:41,294 --> 00:07:43,928 - OH. HOW EXCITING. 136 00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:47,431 - BUT NATURALLY, YOU'RE INVITED AS ONE OF THE SELECT FEW GUESTS. 137 00:07:47,466 --> 00:07:48,465 - GREAT. 138 00:07:48,501 --> 00:07:49,834 LIKE THE PETERSONS, 139 00:07:51,270 --> 00:07:53,638 PEOPLE WHO SELL YOU DENTAL FLOSS. 140 00:07:56,776 --> 00:07:57,775 - HI. 141 00:08:03,149 --> 00:08:05,049 I'M LARRY. THIS IS MY BROTHER DARRYL 142 00:08:05,084 --> 00:08:07,752 AND THIS IS MY OTHER BROTHER DARRYL. 143 00:08:07,787 --> 00:08:10,922 WE WAS OVER AT PETERSON'S DRUGS AND STUFF, 144 00:08:12,258 --> 00:08:15,893 LOOKING FOR A BIRTHDAY GIFT FOR CANDICE BERGEN, 145 00:08:15,928 --> 00:08:19,496 WHEN WE HEARD ABOUT YOUR IMPENDING NUPTIALS. 146 00:08:19,532 --> 00:08:21,699 SO HERE WE ARE. 147 00:08:21,734 --> 00:08:24,702 WHICH ONE OF US IS GONNA BE YOUR BEST MAN? 148 00:08:25,805 --> 00:08:27,204 - I'M SORRY, GUYS. 149 00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:29,507 GEORGE IS GOING TO BE MY BEST MAN. 150 00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:36,013 - WELL, THIS IS A KNEE IN OUR COLLECTIVE GROINS. 151 00:08:39,251 --> 00:08:42,086 BUT WE WON'T HURT YOUR FEELINGS BY NOT COMING TO THE WEDDING. 152 00:08:42,121 --> 00:08:46,690 - WELL, GEE, I DON'T KNOW, GUYS, AFTER WHAT I'VE DONE TO YOU, 153 00:08:46,726 --> 00:08:50,028 IT WOULD SERVE ME RIGHT IF YOU DIDN'T COME. 154 00:08:50,063 --> 00:08:52,230 - NO, WE'LL BE THERE. 155 00:08:52,265 --> 00:08:53,464 IF YOU INVITED THE PETERSONS, 156 00:08:53,499 --> 00:08:56,433 YOU MUST BE HAVING TROUBLE FINDING TAKERS. 157 00:08:57,571 --> 00:09:01,272 - HI, EVERYBODY. HI, DICK. 158 00:09:01,307 --> 00:09:02,540 - HI, CHESTER. HI, JIM. 159 00:09:02,575 --> 00:09:05,676 - WE JUST WANTED TO CONGRATULATE YOU ON YOUR UPCOMING WEDDING. 160 00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:07,845 - AND MAKE SURE WE'RE INVITED. 161 00:09:08,814 --> 00:09:09,847 - LISTEN, GUYS-- 162 00:09:09,882 --> 00:09:11,149 - OF COURSE WE'RE INVITED. 163 00:09:11,184 --> 00:09:13,851 THEY INVITED THE PETERSONS, DIDN'T THEY? 164 00:09:13,886 --> 00:09:17,021 - THAT'S TRUE, AND THEY HARDLY KNOW THE PETERSONS. 165 00:09:17,056 --> 00:09:18,756 I GUESS WE ARE INVITED. 166 00:09:19,759 --> 00:09:23,694 - GOOD. GOOD, THEN, IT'S SET. 167 00:09:24,831 --> 00:09:27,798 DO ME A FAVOR, DON'T SPREAD THIS AROUND. 168 00:09:27,834 --> 00:09:30,101 I DON'T WANT ANY MORE PEOPLE AT THE WEDDING 169 00:09:30,136 --> 00:09:31,902 THAN WE ALREADY HAVE. 170 00:09:31,938 --> 00:09:33,404 ( knocking on door ) 171 00:09:33,439 --> 00:09:36,006 - OH, HI, EVERYBODY. 172 00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:37,341 HI, DICK. 173 00:09:37,377 --> 00:09:39,643 I HEAR YOU'RE PLANNING TO TIE THE KNOT. 174 00:09:39,679 --> 00:09:42,447 - HARLEY, I HAVE TO DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE. 175 00:09:42,482 --> 00:09:43,981 YOU CAN'T COME TO THE WEDDING. 176 00:09:44,016 --> 00:09:47,451 - OH. OH, NO PROBLEM. 177 00:09:47,487 --> 00:09:48,952 WHEN I HEAR THOSE WEDDING BELLS TOLL, 178 00:09:48,988 --> 00:09:53,558 I'LL JUST THROW A HANDFUL OF RICE INTO EMPTY SPACE. 179 00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:56,327 LISTEN, FAR BE IT FROM ME TO PLAY ON YOUR GUILT 180 00:09:56,362 --> 00:09:59,631 BUT MAYBE THERE'S A WEDDING-RELATED JOB I CAN DO? 181 00:09:59,666 --> 00:10:01,799 DO YOU NEED A BOUNCER? 182 00:10:01,835 --> 00:10:03,201 - I DON'T THINK SO. 183 00:10:03,203 --> 00:10:06,104 I'LL BE PACKING HEAT. 184 00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:09,740 - COULD I PARK CARS? 185 00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:11,242 - HARLEY, I DON'T NEED-- 186 00:10:13,612 --> 00:10:15,813 ALL RIGHT, YOU CAN PARK CARS. 187 00:10:15,848 --> 00:10:18,549 - GREAT. IT'LL COST YOU A LITTLE MORE THAN A BOUNCER 188 00:10:18,585 --> 00:10:21,352 BUT IT'S YOUR FUNERAL. 189 00:10:21,387 --> 00:10:25,522 - DICK, A COUPLE OF PEOPLE ARE HERE FROM YOUR TV STATION. 190 00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:27,524 APPARENTLY, THEY HEARD ABOUT THE WEDDING 191 00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:29,393 FROM THE PETERSONS. 192 00:10:29,429 --> 00:10:30,962 CAN I INVITE THEM? 193 00:10:30,997 --> 00:10:34,765 - WHAT THE HECK, A COUPLE MORE PEOPLE WON'T MATTER. 194 00:10:38,771 --> 00:10:40,371 ( people together ) YAYYY!!! 195 00:10:45,578 --> 00:10:47,545 George: SO DICK, DID YOU HAVE A GOOD TIME 196 00:10:47,580 --> 00:10:50,848 AT THE BEAVER BACHELOR BASH LAST NIGHT? 197 00:10:52,285 --> 00:10:54,952 - YEAH, YOU CAN BET THAT WATER PISTOL FIGHT 198 00:10:54,988 --> 00:10:57,021 WILL GO IN MY BOOK OF MEMORIES. 199 00:11:05,098 --> 00:11:08,599 - OH, HONEY, YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL. 200 00:11:08,635 --> 00:11:09,734 - YEAH. 201 00:11:09,769 --> 00:11:12,369 EVEN MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN THAT GIRL THE BEAVERS HIRED 202 00:11:12,404 --> 00:11:15,039 TO JUMP OUT OF THE-- YOU LOOK REAL BEAUTIFUL. 203 00:11:18,911 --> 00:11:20,211 - THANK YOU, GEORGE. 204 00:11:20,246 --> 00:11:22,046 - YOU LOOK NICE TOO, STEPHANIE. 205 00:11:22,081 --> 00:11:24,047 - I HATE THIS STUPID, STUPID DRESS. 206 00:11:25,084 --> 00:11:26,384 - WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH THE DRESS? 207 00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:28,485 YOU LOOK LOVELY. 208 00:11:28,520 --> 00:11:30,621 - OBVIOUSLY. 209 00:11:30,656 --> 00:11:33,224 BUT YOU NEVER TOLD ME I'D HAVE TO WEAR THE SAME OUTFIT 210 00:11:33,259 --> 00:11:35,492 AS A BUNCH OF YUCKY BRIDESMAIDS. 211 00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:36,961 - STEPHANIE, THAT'S HOW IT'S DONE. 212 00:11:36,996 --> 00:11:39,430 PLEASE, JUST TRY TO LIVE WITH THIS, OKAY? 213 00:11:39,465 --> 00:11:42,700 ( sighing ) 214 00:11:44,470 --> 00:11:48,039 - WELL, STEPHANIE AND I SHOULD BE GETTING TO THE CHAPEL. 215 00:11:48,074 --> 00:11:49,773 ARE YOU READY? 216 00:11:49,808 --> 00:11:51,542 - I GUESS SO. 217 00:11:51,577 --> 00:11:53,911 BUT I FEEL LIKE A BACK-UP SINGER. 218 00:11:56,382 --> 00:11:58,849 - SO, 15 YEARS SHOW? 219 00:11:58,885 --> 00:11:59,816 - YEAH. 220 00:12:02,088 --> 00:12:05,956 NO, WHAT I MEAN IS, YOU KNOW, THEY LOOK GREAT ON YOU. 221 00:12:06,993 --> 00:12:08,092 - THANKS. 222 00:12:10,363 --> 00:12:15,199 AND THANKS FOR MARRYING ME, BOTH TIMES. 223 00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:18,302 - HONEY, YOU KNOW, THESE THINGS DON'T COME EASY TO ME 224 00:12:18,338 --> 00:12:21,972 BUT DITTO. 225 00:12:23,209 --> 00:12:24,408 - OH, DICK. 226 00:12:24,443 --> 00:12:25,776 ( phone ringing ) 227 00:12:25,812 --> 00:12:26,944 I'LL GET IT. 228 00:12:31,317 --> 00:12:32,950 STRATFORD INN. 229 00:12:32,985 --> 00:12:34,318 OH, HI. 230 00:12:36,789 --> 00:12:38,322 OH, THAT'S TOO BAD. 231 00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:40,224 WELL, THANKS FOR CALLING. 232 00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:42,059 BYE. 233 00:12:42,094 --> 00:12:43,127 THAT WAS THE PETERSONS. 234 00:12:43,162 --> 00:12:44,862 THEY CAN'T MAKE IT TO THE WEDDING. 235 00:12:51,871 --> 00:12:52,903 - WHAT? 236 00:12:52,939 --> 00:12:54,438 - WHEN THEY HEARD HOW MANY PEOPLE WERE COMING, 237 00:12:54,474 --> 00:12:55,506 THEY CHANGED THEIR MINDS. 238 00:12:55,541 --> 00:12:58,742 IT TURNS OUT THEY HATE CROWDS. 239 00:12:58,777 --> 00:13:00,811 - YOU MEAN, THEY'RE WEASELING OUT? 240 00:13:00,846 --> 00:13:01,779 - WELL, DICK, WHAT DO YOU CARE? 241 00:13:01,814 --> 00:13:03,514 IT'S NOT LIKE THEY'RE FRIENDS. 242 00:13:03,549 --> 00:13:04,949 - WELL, OF COURSE THEY'RE NOT FRIENDS. 243 00:13:04,984 --> 00:13:06,784 THE MOST INTIMATE THING THEY EVER SAID TO ME IS 244 00:13:06,819 --> 00:13:08,718 "YOU WANT A BAG FOR THAT?" 245 00:13:08,754 --> 00:13:12,122 BUT YOU WENT AND INVITED THEM AND THAT'S THE REASON 246 00:13:12,158 --> 00:13:15,793 THAT THE WHOLE TOWN IS COMING TO THIS STUPID THING. 247 00:13:15,795 --> 00:13:17,461 - STUPID THING? 248 00:13:17,496 --> 00:13:20,964 - ALL RIGHT, STUPID PUBLIC AFFIRMATION OF OUR LOVE. 249 00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:24,235 STUPID POTATO, STUPID POT-AH-TO. 250 00:13:24,270 --> 00:13:27,070 AND NOW THE PEOPLE RESPONSIBLE ARE THE ONLY ONES 251 00:13:27,106 --> 00:13:30,040 WHO ARE SMART ENOUGH NOT TO SHOW UP. 252 00:13:30,076 --> 00:13:31,542 - OH, YEAH? 253 00:13:31,577 --> 00:13:34,245 WELL, YOU'RE LOOKING AT ANOTHER SMARTIE. 254 00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:36,981 YOU ARE THE MOST UNROMANTIC MAN I'VE EVER MET. 255 00:13:37,016 --> 00:13:38,548 AND I WOULDN'T MARRY YOU A SECOND TIME 256 00:13:38,584 --> 00:13:41,452 IF YOU WERE THE LAST UNROMANTIC MAN ON EARTH. 257 00:13:41,487 --> 00:13:43,688 ( footsteps stamping away ) 258 00:13:43,723 --> 00:13:45,789 - WAIT, WAIT A MINUTE. 259 00:13:45,824 --> 00:13:47,124 ( door slamming ) 260 00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:48,792 CUTE-UMS? 261 00:13:58,104 --> 00:13:59,070 JOANNA? 262 00:14:02,442 --> 00:14:07,545 JOANNA, C'MON, LET'S GO GET MARRIED. 263 00:14:10,249 --> 00:14:13,484 Joanna: GIVE ME ONE GOOD REASON WHY WE SHOULD. 264 00:14:15,087 --> 00:14:17,955 - HOW ABOUT $2,000 265 00:14:17,990 --> 00:14:21,191 THAT WE MIGHT AS WELL HAVE THROWN IN THE BLENDER. 266 00:14:22,628 --> 00:14:24,628 Joanna: WRONG REASON, DICK. 267 00:14:26,165 --> 00:14:29,734 - HOW ABOUT A ROOM FULL OF GIFTS WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO RETURN? 268 00:14:32,572 --> 00:14:38,141 HOW ABOUT THE WHOLE TOWN IS WAITING TO SEE US GET MARRIED? 269 00:14:41,748 --> 00:14:44,548 HOW ABOUT THOSE CELTICS? 270 00:14:47,052 --> 00:14:49,553 Joanna: WHAT? 271 00:14:49,589 --> 00:14:54,525 - I WAS JUST CHECKING TO SEE IF YOU WERE STILL THERE. 272 00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:56,126 Joanna: DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND? 273 00:14:56,161 --> 00:14:59,296 I WANTED THIS DAY TO BE SPECIAL. 274 00:14:59,331 --> 00:15:02,366 YOU'RE JUST NOT ROMANTIC ENOUGH, THAT'S ALL. 275 00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:08,071 - MAYBE I WASN'T ENTHUSIASTIC ABOUT RESTATING OUR VOWS BUT, 276 00:15:08,107 --> 00:15:12,943 HEY, THIS GUY IS ROMANTIC. 277 00:15:12,978 --> 00:15:15,712 Joanna: YOU NEVER EVEN PROPOSED TO ME. 278 00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:17,481 - IT MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH THE FACT 279 00:15:17,517 --> 00:15:20,884 THAT WE'RE ALREADY MARRIED. 280 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:23,019 Joanna: SEE! 281 00:15:25,558 --> 00:15:29,359 - HONEY, WILL YOU MARRY ME? 282 00:15:29,394 --> 00:15:30,494 Joanna: NO. 283 00:15:36,202 --> 00:15:38,302 - PLEASE? 284 00:15:38,337 --> 00:15:40,237 Joanna: ARE YOU DOWN ON ONE KNEE? 285 00:15:44,377 --> 00:15:45,742 - YEAH. 286 00:15:48,314 --> 00:15:49,780 Joanna: NO, YOU'RE NOT. 287 00:15:55,354 --> 00:15:58,422 - JOANNA, WILL YOU MARRY ME? 288 00:15:58,457 --> 00:15:59,457 Joanna: WHY? 289 00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:05,463 - WELL, FOR ONE THING ALL MY SOCKS ARE IN THERE. 290 00:16:07,867 --> 00:16:08,999 Joanna: DICK. 291 00:16:09,035 --> 00:16:12,937 - HONEY, THIS IS THE GOD'S HONEST TRUTH. 292 00:16:14,207 --> 00:16:17,474 I LOVE YOU SO MUCH IT HURTS. 293 00:16:21,214 --> 00:16:22,246 Joanna: REALLY? 294 00:16:24,583 --> 00:16:26,683 - QUITE A LOT, ACTUALLY. 295 00:16:30,223 --> 00:16:32,689 - YOU SAID YOU WERE ON ONE KNEE! 296 00:16:34,193 --> 00:16:35,559 - I WAS. 297 00:16:35,594 --> 00:16:37,795 Joanna: JUST FORGET IT, DICK. 298 00:16:37,830 --> 00:16:42,066 - I WAS A PICTURE OF ROMANCE OUT HERE. 299 00:16:43,969 --> 00:16:48,839 HONEY, WHAT ABOUT THE WEDDING? 300 00:16:48,874 --> 00:16:51,842 Joanna: JUST DO WHAT YOU WANTED TO DO ALL ALONG. 301 00:16:51,877 --> 00:16:54,277 TELL EVERYBODY THE WEDDING IS OFF. 302 00:16:55,314 --> 00:16:58,816 - YOUR TIMING IS PERFECT ON THIS. 303 00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:03,220 I THINK I KNOW WHERE I CAN FIND 'EM ALL IN ONE PLACE. 304 00:17:05,525 --> 00:17:09,793 - STEPHANIE, SHOULDN'T ALL YOU BRIDESMAIDS BE DRESSED ALIKE? 305 00:17:09,829 --> 00:17:12,496 - WHAT ARE WE, TRIPLETS? 306 00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:14,732 - HI, MICHAEL. WELCOME TO THE WEDDING. 307 00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:15,799 I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND 308 00:17:15,835 --> 00:17:18,202 THAT DICK PICKED ME TO BE HIS BEST MAN. 309 00:17:18,237 --> 00:17:20,604 - IT'S OKAY, GEORGE, I DECIDED I DIDN'T WANT THE JOB 310 00:17:20,639 --> 00:17:22,439 WHEN I FOUND OUT ONE OF THE BEST MAN'S DUTIES 311 00:17:22,474 --> 00:17:25,776 IS TO KISS THE MINISTER AFTER THE CEREMONY. 312 00:17:30,682 --> 00:17:32,583 - HI, STEPH. NICE DRESS. 313 00:17:32,618 --> 00:17:33,617 - YOU LIKE IT? 314 00:17:33,652 --> 00:17:35,820 IT'S JUST A LITTLE SOMETHING I BOUGHT FROM THE BRIDE 315 00:17:35,855 --> 00:17:38,989 AT THE WEDDING BEFORE THIS. 316 00:17:39,024 --> 00:17:40,223 - HI, HARLEY. 317 00:17:40,259 --> 00:17:42,092 HOW'S THE PARKING CARS GOING? 318 00:17:42,128 --> 00:17:43,627 - OH, WELL, IT'S NOT MUCH FUN, 319 00:17:43,663 --> 00:17:46,830 BUT IT'LL LOOK GOOD ON MY RESUME. 320 00:17:46,865 --> 00:17:49,099 George: HI, LARRY, DARRYL, DARRYL. 321 00:17:49,135 --> 00:17:50,334 WELCOME TO THE WEDDING. 322 00:17:52,504 --> 00:17:54,905 I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND THAT DICK-- 323 00:17:54,941 --> 00:17:58,508 WELL, AT LEAST DARRYL'S TALKING TO ME. 324 00:17:58,543 --> 00:18:01,845 - THIS MUST BE WHERE THE BEST MAN REJECTS ARE PARKING IT? 325 00:18:03,249 --> 00:18:07,017 - MISS STEPHANIE, MAY I SAY, YOU LOOK LOVELY IN THAT GOWN. 326 00:18:07,052 --> 00:18:10,053 EVEN THOUGH IT REEKS OF A FORMER OCCUPANT. 327 00:18:13,525 --> 00:18:15,426 - THANK YOU, LARRY. 328 00:18:16,695 --> 00:18:17,828 - OH, HI, BOSS. 329 00:18:17,863 --> 00:18:19,997 YOU WANT ME TO PARK YOUR CAR? 330 00:18:20,032 --> 00:18:23,533 - NO, LEAVE IT BY THE DOOR WITH THE MOTOR RUNNING. 331 00:18:24,703 --> 00:18:27,304 - HI, DICK. THEY'RE HERE. 332 00:18:27,340 --> 00:18:29,340 ( applause ) 333 00:18:31,144 --> 00:18:34,145 ( organ music: "Here Comes the Bride" ) 334 00:18:36,015 --> 00:18:38,882 - COULD I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE. 335 00:18:38,917 --> 00:18:40,784 I'D LIKE TO THANK YOU ALL FOR COMING 336 00:18:40,819 --> 00:18:46,557 BUT THE WEDDING IS OFF. 337 00:18:46,592 --> 00:18:49,059 - IT IS? HOW COME? 338 00:18:49,094 --> 00:18:51,127 - IT'S JOANNA. 339 00:18:51,163 --> 00:18:53,630 SHE WANTED EVERYTHING TO BE PERFECT 340 00:18:53,666 --> 00:18:56,533 AND THEN, WOULDN'T YOU KNOW, AT THE LAST MINUTE, 341 00:18:56,568 --> 00:19:01,004 SHE SPILT MOUTHWASH ON HER WEDDING GOWN. 342 00:19:01,039 --> 00:19:02,572 - NO! 343 00:19:02,608 --> 00:19:05,542 - NEVER KNEW MOUTHWASH TO STAIN, DICK. 344 00:19:05,578 --> 00:19:06,910 - AND GRAPE JUICE. 345 00:19:08,180 --> 00:19:10,413 - A LITTLE COLD WATER AND A FEW DROPS OF GLYCERIN WILL-- 346 00:19:10,449 --> 00:19:13,784 - AND INK AND EPOXY RESINS. 347 00:19:15,721 --> 00:19:17,755 YOU CAN ALL APPRECIATE HOW THERE'S, YOU KNOW, 348 00:19:17,790 --> 00:19:21,591 NO POINT IN HAVING A WEDDING WITHOUT A BRIDE. 349 00:19:21,627 --> 00:19:22,993 George: SHE'S HERE! 350 00:19:23,028 --> 00:19:24,929 ( cheering ) 351 00:19:24,964 --> 00:19:26,429 ( applause ) 352 00:19:26,465 --> 00:19:29,399 ( organ music: "Here Comes the Bride" ) 353 00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,937 - HONEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 354 00:19:33,973 --> 00:19:35,372 - I DIDN'T WANT TO EMBARRASS YOU. 355 00:19:35,407 --> 00:19:38,275 I KNOW HOW BAD YOU ARE AT MAKING UP EXCUSES. 356 00:19:40,145 --> 00:19:43,480 - WELL, THAT SHOWS HOW LITTLE YOU KNOW ABOUT ME. 357 00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:44,782 - DRESS LOOKS FINE, DICK. 358 00:19:44,817 --> 00:19:46,350 - I THOUGHT YOU SAID IT WAS A MESS. 359 00:19:46,385 --> 00:19:50,019 - YEAH, HOW DID YOU GET RID OF THOSE EPOXY RESINS? 360 00:19:50,055 --> 00:19:51,020 - WHAT? 361 00:19:51,056 --> 00:19:53,390 - WILL YOU PLAY THE DAMN MUSIC? 362 00:19:53,425 --> 00:19:56,426 ( organ music: "Here Comes the Bride" ) 363 00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:05,602 DOES THIS MEAN YOU'RE NOT UPSET AT ME ANYMORE? 364 00:20:05,637 --> 00:20:08,171 - KEEP DREAMING. 365 00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:11,275 I'M GOING TO SAY "I DO," AND THOSE ARE THE LAST WORDS 366 00:20:11,310 --> 00:20:13,444 YOU'LL EVER HEAR OUT OF ME. 367 00:20:22,354 --> 00:20:25,488 - STEPHANIE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN A BRIDAL GOWN? 368 00:20:25,524 --> 00:20:27,958 - I COULD ASK YOU THE SAME THING. 369 00:20:32,131 --> 00:20:37,668 - FRIENDS, WE ARE GATHERED HERE BECAUSE DICK AND JOANNA LOUDON 370 00:20:37,703 --> 00:20:40,170 WOULD LIKE TO RENEW THE WEDDING VOWS 371 00:20:40,205 --> 00:20:46,342 THEY MADE TO EACH OTHER 15 YEARS AGO TODAY. 372 00:20:46,378 --> 00:20:51,615 THIS IS A JOYOUS OCCASION FOR THEM AND FOR THOSE OF US 373 00:20:51,650 --> 00:20:57,154 WHO WERE INVITED TO SHARE IN THIS CELEBRATION OF THEIR LOVE. 374 00:20:57,189 --> 00:20:59,957 AND THEY'RE MAKING MY JOB EASY TODAY 375 00:20:59,992 --> 00:21:03,760 BECAUSE THEY'VE PREPARED THEIR OWN WEDDING VOWS. 376 00:21:03,795 --> 00:21:06,930 - REVEREND, I THINK MAYBE WE'D BETTER USE YOURS. 377 00:21:06,965 --> 00:21:08,431 - OH, WELL-- 378 00:21:08,466 --> 00:21:17,374 - UH, GEE, JOANNA, I'D KIND OF LIKE TO READ WHAT I HAVE HERE. 379 00:21:19,678 --> 00:21:23,213 I WROTE THIS 15 YEARS AGO FOR OUR FIRST WEDDING 380 00:21:23,249 --> 00:21:26,549 BUT DUE TO THE CIRCUMSTANCES OF THE CEREMONY 381 00:21:26,585 --> 00:21:29,153 I NEVER GOT A CHANCE TO READ IT 382 00:21:29,188 --> 00:21:32,222 BUT I THINK THE SENTIMENTS EXPRESSED HERE 383 00:21:32,258 --> 00:21:37,761 ARE JUST AS APPROPRIATE TODAY AS THEY WERE IN 1971. 384 00:21:39,564 --> 00:21:41,999 "DEAREST JOANNA, I PROMISE TO MAKE EVERY DAY 385 00:21:42,034 --> 00:21:47,370 "OF OUR LIFE TOGETHER A LOVE-IN. 386 00:21:55,281 --> 00:21:58,448 "TO NEVER GIVE OFF BAD VIBES, 387 00:22:01,187 --> 00:22:04,121 "NO MATTER WHAT BAG YOU'RE IN. 388 00:22:07,092 --> 00:22:09,492 "NEVER TO LAY HEAD TRIPS ON YOU." 389 00:22:14,266 --> 00:22:18,168 ACTUALLY, THIS ISN'T AS TIMELESS AS I REMEMBER. 390 00:22:20,739 --> 00:22:25,209 MAYBE I'LL SKIP THIS SECTION ON CAMBODIA. 391 00:22:31,783 --> 00:22:35,785 "FINALLY, JOANNA, I PROMISE IF MY LOVE FOR YOU EVER CHANGES 392 00:22:35,821 --> 00:22:39,923 "THAT IT WILL ONLY MEAN IT'S GROWN STRONGER," 393 00:22:39,959 --> 00:22:43,994 AND THAT'S STILL TRUE TODAY. 394 00:22:44,029 --> 00:22:46,830 - OH, DICK. 395 00:22:46,866 --> 00:22:49,266 - EXCUSE ME, BUT THE KISS COMES LATER. 396 00:22:50,202 --> 00:22:52,703 - WANT A BET? 397 00:22:59,879 --> 00:23:02,879 ( theme music playing ) 398 00:23:28,774 --> 00:23:30,440 - MEOW! 29117

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