All language subtitles for Dr.Quinn.Medicine.Woman.S04E06.Dorothys.Book.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP2.0.H.264-Kitsune_track3_[eng]

- Oh, Dorothy!
- Oh, oh, excuse me.

- Dor-- Are you all right?
- I can't talk now.

Brian told me you've got
a package for me from New York.

Oh, sure do.

And it came from Sonora.

Ain't you gonna open it?

Oh.

- Dorothy.
- What is it?

It's my book.

Could you please sign this
for me, Dorothy?

- There you are.
- Oh, thank you so much.

Dorothy, a book!

- Well, I can't believe it.
- Neither can I.

You know, I never thought
anybody would publish it.

At first, I thought
I'd never finish it.

And then, I thought,
"It isn't any good."

Then, well, here it is.

Dorothy, a book --

Well, that's something people
can hold in their hands

and read and treasure.

I'm just so impressed.

Published by a fancy
New York publisher, too.

What's it about?

This town and all my friends
and how you all help me

and what it's like to live
on the frontier.

Am I in it?

Oh, Michaela.

Of course you are.

Here.

I want you to have one --
no charge.

Now, you come and see me
the minute that you finish it.

I want to know what you think,
what you really think.

Oh, thank you.
I can't wait.

Dorothy, I would be honored if
you would inscribe this for me.

Oh, of course, Reverend.

Ain't she a wonder?

Sits down
and writes herself a book.

Never gave me a hint.

You kept the secret, too.

Well, actually,
she didn't tell me.

Why, you two are best friends.

I'm surprised
she wouldn't have told you.

From the day I walked
into Colorado Springs --

battered, confused, terrified --

this town helped me put
my life back together.

The folks here are strong
and good-hearted.

They've been my salvation
and my inspiration.

I dedicate this volume to them
with my gratitude and love.

You told the whole world
that I was an ignorant drunk.

I did not.

It's right here
in black and white,

in a book from New York City.

I wrote that you had
the strength of character

to control your drinking and
to learn to read as an adult,

which certainly isn't easy.

Oh, that's fine.

I learned
just so I could read this trash!

Jake!

Anybody reading that book is
gonna see how strong you are.

Getting over what you did,
getting elected mayor,

I wrote about you
because I admire that.

That's not why you wrote this.

What are you talking about?

Revenge --
You wanted to get back at me

for the way things turned out
between us.

Dorothy?

Hmm.

I'm up to page 26.

And there's, uh, something
I've got to ask you.

Of course, Loren.

Where am I?

Oh, Loren, you're in there.
Just keep on reading.

We were all so proud of the way
Myra declared her independence

and freed herself
from a contract with Hank.

Horace, you're about to pull
my arm out of my shoulder.

He was staring at you,
a perfect stranger.

He just tipped his hat.

He smiled at me.

- Oh, what's wrong with that?
- He was reading that book.

Oh, so? Everybody's reading
Dorothy's book.

I know.
They're all looking at us.

I don't see
nobody looking at us.

- Why would they?
- Because she wrote about us.

And now everybody's
going to know.

Know what?

Know that you were
one of Hank's girls.

There is not a soul
that we care about that

doesn't know about my past.

Now, tell me what's really
going on, Horace.

I-I-it's something
about seeing it in a book.

A --a book just ain't gossip.

It sticks around a long time.

Samantha can read it
when she gets older.

What gives Dorothy the right

to print stuff
about folks' lives?

Well, she's a reporter.

She does it every day
in The Gazette.

It doesn't bother anyone.

Besides, what harm can there be
in telling the truth?

Did you read that book,
Dr. Mike?

Well, I've been so busy today,

I haven't had a spare moment,
But I can't wait.

See how you feel
after you read it.

Our most perfectly named
citizen is Grace.

She and her husband haven't been
able to have children.

But that hasn't daunted her.

She's taken Myra
and her baby under her wing.

And they even tried to adopt
an Indian orphan.

That's the kind of woman
she is --

even more graceful
in difficulty.

Grace, I should have
this wood box finished

by the end of the day.

That'd be real nice.

Thanks for giving me a hand.

Is Grace all right?

I don't know what's going on.

I mean, she's making mistakes.
She's messing up orders.

Grace, where's our food?

I'd like to eat lunch
before it gets to be suppertime.

Grace?

What is it?
You're sick?

Will you give them
their plates?

Look at me, Grace.

Look at me.

Will you look at them --

talking about me.

That's all I am to people now,
a woman who can't have children.

H-how do you know
that's what they're saying?

I-I bet they're talking
about how good your food is.

Nobody whispers about food!

Grace, these folks
like you anyway...

Anyway!

I don't want
them to like me "anyway."

I don't want them to pity me.

I don't want the first thing
that strangers know about me

is that I'm not all
a woman should be.

Nobody thinks that, Grace.

The food is getting cold.

Here!
Here, finally.

"Loren Bray, my brother-in-law,
owns the general store.

He was kind enough
to put me up."

Well, I-I'm sure there will be
more of me later.

They always save the exciting
stuff for the end.

Better not to be mentioned
at all than --

Than what?

I only wish Dorothy hadn't
written about me being a...

Gambler?

Hand of poker, Reverend?

You missed the point, Jake.

Dorothy was showing how
the Reverend cleaned himself up

and found the Lord.

I only hope the people who
don't know me see it that way.

Some of those who do know you
don't see it that way.

You didn't quite come off
as a saint, Hank.

She writes about
how you cheat your customers,

water down your whiskey,
keep prostitutes.

My reputation stands.

What I want to know is
why does Sully come off like

the hero of a dime novel?

I ain't never seen such
a bigger bunch of crybabies.

You're all mad 'cause
she wrote the truth.

Right, Michaela

Dorothy's overcome so much
herself.

I-I think she means this book
to be inspirational.

I'm sure she didn't mean
to offend anyone.

You read it?

Oh, I haven't had time yet.

But I'm looking forward
to reading it this afternoon.

Where exactly you gonna be
when you're reading it?

Oh, in the clinic, I suppose.
Why?

Might want to steer clear

of that part of town today,
folks.

May I speak with you, please?

How could you?

How could you put that
in a book?

What?

Well, that was private,
Dorothy.

What are you talking about?

Me telling you about Sully,

about our courtship,

about how I'd never been
with a man.

Oh, that's nothing
to be ashamed of.

That's not the point!

The point is
that it was private, Dorothy.

It was between you and me.

It shows you lead
an honorable life,

which is not
what most people think

of single women living out here.

Dorothy, I am not a lesson
for your readers.

I have feelings.

You knew how hard it was
for me to -- to talk

about being afraid.

You knew that you were the
only person that I confided in.

How could you put it in a book,
a book that anyone could read?

Are these all the books
you've got left?

- How much to buy them all?
- Colleen?

Everybody's going to know
about me and Jesse

on the cattle drive,
how he lied about loving me.

You wrote about that?

You told her?

Well, yes, I -- but --

You know
how ruthless children can be.

How could you put Colleen
through that?

Maybe you ought to read
the whole book

before you go flying
off the handle.

Isn't that what a friend would
do before she made up her mind?

- But there are some things --
- Excuse me.

I've got some writing to do.

And I believe you've got
some reading to do.

Finished reading it?

It only gets worse.

It ain't that bad.

Brian told her
he misses his real ma.

Why do I have to read
about that in a book?

I read that part.

I thought she made it show
what a good mother you are.

Well, why does she have
to write about it at all?

Are you sure
you're not more upset

that Brian told her
instead of you?

I chose hummingbirds
for the report,

but I can't ever
get close enough to draw one.

- We could build a bird feeder.
- Could we?

Sure.

What do they eat, Ma?

Um, I'm not sure.

Sugar water?

Brian, if something was
bothering you,

you'd tell me, wouldn't you?

Sure.

The people we miss
who have passed on,

like your ma,

people we love,
they stay with us always.

My father is still a part of me.

His influence and love
are with me every day.

Do you understand?

Can I be excused?

Can I be excused, too?

"May I."

May I be excused?

You've hardly eaten a thing.

I'm not hungry.

Are you feeling all right?

If your friends are making fun
of you because of the book,

- they'll tire of it soon, and --
- It's not that.

It's just...

for the last few days,
I've been feeling kind of...

What?

I don't know.
I-I got this headache, and...

Can I --

May I be excused?

Of course.

Trust is the foundation
of any relationship.

I know that some of you
may have learned

something new about me
these past few days,

about who I was
before I joined the church.

But I want you to know
that you can trust me.

The relationship between
a minister and his congregation

is like the relationship
between a doctor and patient,

or a close friendship.

It's private.

If you want to tell me anything,
it's just between us.

It was a great sermon,
Reverend.

Thank you.

Reverend.

Have a nice day.

- Oh, thank you for the comments.
- Thank you.

Jake, you didn't bring in
the text

for the ad you're placing
in The Gazette.

I changed my mind.

- But as I was saying...
- Oh, I know. I...

Grace, I-I baked a pie
for the picnic.

I know it can't compare
to yours,

but I didn't want
to show up empty-handed.

Well, we're not going.

Robert E. is feeling poorly.

You understand.

Ain't you gonna do something?

What can I do?

Dorothy.

I wasn't real happy
you wrote about

how I gambled away
the town's money

and even
Ingrid's engagement ring.

Then, I figured it out.

You showed how it helped me make
something of myself.

The fact is I'm honored
to be in your book.

Thank you, Matthew.

And I'd be honored
if you'd allow me

to escort you into town.

Oh!

To be paid to write!

I can't believe it.

Neither can I.

Horace.

Oh, my goodness.
Oh, my goodness.

The publisher says
that the book is doing so well

that he wants me to write
another book.

Dorothy!

- That's wonderful.
- Oh.

I hope it ain't about us.

Horace.

Horace,
if -- if I've offended you,

I'm sorry,
but I honestly don't know why.

There isn't a word in that book
that isn't the truth.

I thought
everybody would like my book.

I liked it.

I read it straight through.
I couldn't put it down.

I was hoping
you'd sign it for me.

Oh.

In fact, a friend of mine is
the editor of The Denver Post.

I was going to wire him
and suggest

that he send a journalist
down here to interview you...

...with your approval.

Interview?

Oh, that --
that would be wonderful.

No, it's your book
that's wonderful.

And it's going to do
wonderful things for this town.

She gone?

Yeah.

I can't believe you're
still reading that trash.

Just double-checking it.

I hear she's giving
an interview.

Got to tell the whole world
I'm a fool.

Well, at least you're a fool.

Beg your pardon?

Well, I'm just a bore.

According to this book,
all I do is dust.

That is all you do.

Well, she don't have
to write about it.

Besides,
I've got more than that.

Remember,
I was going to Bolivia.

But you didn't go.

- But I was planning to.
- And you didn't.

But it was important to me.

She knew it was important to me.

Think what it tells you
about a man,

a man who plans
to make a trip like that.

Then doesn't go.

You really want that
in the book?

Hello, Jake.

got to go, Loren.

Dorothy?

Yes, Loren?

You know, there ain't much
about me in that book of yours.

Some people would be happy
about that.

Do you really think I'm so...

I mean, it's just everything
you've got me doing is so...

not exactly fascinating.

Oh, Loren, not everyone has
to be fascinating.

Still, it's hard
to work up much excitement

for somebody
who never does much.

I know.

I'm not sure excitement is
all that it's made out to be.

Okay, folks,
clear the the way.

Turn just over that way,
just a bit.

Just step back just a bit.
Okay, oh, oh, oh.

Stay there.

All right, now make sure
you get as much of the bank

in the background as you can.

Mrs. Jennings, why do you think
your book is so popular?

Oh, I can't say for sure.

Maybe it's because it's
about real people in the West.

Maybe that's why it's exciting
to city folk.

Hold still for the photograph,
please.

You know, there's no question
that city people

are just fascinated
with life out here.

And her book makes
the West appealing.

That's right.

And this is just the kind
of town

they want to come and visit.

And -- who knows --
perhaps even settle down in.

Dorothy, I'm going to make sure
every paper in this country

knows about your book.

It's about the best piece
of civic promotion

Colorado Springs could ask for.

You can move now.

Oh, Michaela!

Michaela.

This -- this gentleman is
from The Denver Post.

I think you should be
a part of his article.

You're so important
to this town and to me.

This is Dr. Quinn.

Oh, Dr. Michaela Quinn?

- From your book?
- Yes.

I know our readers would love
to know more about you.

Excuse me,
but I have patients to see.

She -- she is very busy.

Would you excuse me a minute?
I'll be right back.

Have I told you
about the clock?

Yes, I can see you've got lots
of patients waiting.

Dorothy, I told you
just the other day

how important my privacy
is to me.

And now, you try to get me
into the newspaper?

I was trying to be nice!

I thought you'd be excited!

It seems we hardly know
each other anymore.

How can you not understand?

Oh, Michaela,
I am trying to understand.

Why are you so upset about this?

Not everyone likes to be the
center of attention, Dorothy.

What's wrong
with a little attention?

If you were to substitute

your name for mine in your book,
or Grace's or Colleen's,

think about how you'd feel.

I wrote things about myself
that were personal,

about my husband --
how he beat me.

But you chose to.
I didn't have a choice.

You didn't give me one.

You had no right.

I do!
I do have a right.

You, yourself, always told me

I've got a duty
to tell the truth.

You've got your doctoring to
make yourself feel worthwhile.

Well, now I've got my book!

Standing outside that door is

the best thing
that ever happened to me.

And I wanted my friend,
my best friend,

to be a part of it,
to be happy for me.

In medical school and then
practicing with my father,

people have always talked
about me, mostly behind my back.

It wasn't any better
coming out here.

Somehow I've always been
on display.

And it's the price I pay.
I know that.

But are some things
that I need to keep for me.

They're the center of who I am.

And if you can't
understand that --

What?

I don't know
how to be with you anymore.

Every time I open my mouth,

I'm afraid
you're going to write about it.

I'm afraid this very minute.

How can we be friends
if I can't trust you?

What do you want me to do?
Stop writing?

Oh.

Hm.

You're right.

We can't be friends.

I realize now
we never really were.

I may be a little late.

I'm going
to the quilting circle.

You all right?

I think I'll pick up Colleen
from school instead.

I've been meaning
to talk to her.

Is that why you're not going
to the quilting circle?

Or is it 'cause Dorothy
might be there?

You've been miserable since
the two of you stopped talking.

Well, how can I be friends
with her if I can't trust her?

You didn't agree
about something.

That's no reason
to lose a friend.

Sully, how did this turn
into a fight between us?

I guess I was hoping
that you'd just try harder

to work things out
with people that matter to you.

You're right.
This is hard.

And I'd appreciate your help
instead of your criticism.

I'm not going to help you make
Dorothy not matter to you.

- Bye.
- Bye.

Still have that headache?

What about your appetite?

Colleen, please,
if you're upset about the book,

perhaps there's something
I can do to help.

But if there's something
wrong with you physically,

you have to tell me.

It's just
for the past week or so,

- I haven't --
- Are you in pain?

It's so embarrassing.

We've always been able to talk.

You know you can tell
me anything.

And then you go tell everybody,

just like you told Dorothy
about me and Jesse.

I'm sorry I'm late.

I'm afraid I left
my quilting supplies at home.

That's all right.
I-I've got a needle.

Here.

Thank you.

Grace,
why don't you take Samantha?

I'm just trying
to get this stitch.

Please, you've got such a way
with her.

Here, you go with Grace.

You know how much you love her.

What did I tell you?

You've got the touch.

Afternoon, ladies.

What a lovely gathering --
Just a scene perfect

for immortalization
in Collier's Magazine.

Collier's?

They're sending their best
reporter to interview you.

- Oh!
- Old Harvard chum of mine.

Oh, Collier's!

Oh, I always used to sit at home

and read and wonder over
the people in that magazine.

Well now, they'll be
sitting at home reading

and wondering over you...

Oh, my.

...and our beautiful town.

You, uh, all right, Dorothy?

Of course I am.
Why shouldn't I be?

- You're getting a late start.
- I'm just a little tired.

Don't make such a fuss.

I, uh, got in some
of that peppermint tea you like.

Well, maybe later.

You know, folks have been
asking about The Gazette.

It ain't like you to be late.

Oh, Loren, I don't know.

I just --

I can't seem to figure --

I never meant to hurt anybody.

Oh, don't you worry
about hurting my feelings!

I'm like a stick
of old furniture you forget.

I'm used to it.

Loren, you got any more copies
of our bestseller?

No.

All sold out.

Well, I need some copies
to send to some people

who are interested investing
in our fair city.

When are you
gonna get some more?

Well, I, uh,
I may not be ordering any more.

Why on Earth not?

It's not like you not to stock
a product that's so popular.

Dorothy?

Just a little tired.

Mix some sugar and water up,

and you're going to be fighting
those hummingbirds off.

Hey, Brian, is
there something --

is there something
you want to talk about?

It's all right if you don't want
to talk about it.

It is?

Sure.

Do you know sometimes when you
don't talk about things,

they rattle around in your head

and can seem bigger
than it really is.

Sometimes it's best
just to let it out.

Even if --

if it'll maybe
make somebody mad?

You mean like your ma?

Yeah.

I'm just learning my way
around this, myself.

But it seems that
when you don't talk to her,

it's worse than anything
you could ever say.

She never gets out of bed.

She's -- she's not eating
anything.

And it's been days, now.

- Did she ask you to come for me?
- No.

She doesn't know I'm here.

But she's got to be sick.

She even missed putting out
The Gazette,

and that's never happened
before.

I'll get my bag.
I'll be right over.

Come in.

Loren said you were ill.

Oh, well, I --

I don't know.
I'm -- I'm --

I'm tired,
and I can't seem to sleep.

Any appetite?

Any pain?

I'm sure it's nothing.

Well, I think
I should examine you anyway.

May I feel your throat?

You don't have to.

I think it would be wise.

Well, you don't seem
to have a fever.

I'm sorry.
Did I hurt you?

Everything appears to be normal.

It's the book.

It's the book.
It's made, too much trouble.

That's why I haven't
been able to sleep.

I had no idea things
would turn out like this.

I keep -- I keep going
over and over it in my mind.

Do you want me to give you
something to help you sleep?

What I want, Michaela, is for
things to be the way they were.

So I've been thinking
that maybe the best medicine

is to stop writing.

So that's what I'm gonna do.

Ma?

Brian.
You can't sleep?

Your head ever get so full
it feels like it's gonna bust?

I suppose that's
why I couldn't sleep, either.

You want some warm milk?

I guess you read in that book
what I told Miss Dorothy.

I was scared that if I told you
I missed Ma...

that it'd hurt your feelings.

That's very thoughtful
of you, Brian.

I don't mean I don't love you.

It's -- it's just different.

Well, you're right, Brian.

There are different kinds
of love,

too many for one little word.

I think the best kind is --

is feeling safe with people,

knowing you can confide in them

and you'll still
love each other.

That's how I feel with you.

Me, too.

- Goodnight, Ma.
- Goodnight.

Thank you.

I'm not the one
who brought it up.

How is The Gazette coming?

I'm finished with The Gazette.

And I've written my publisher

to tell him I'm not going
to write the other book.

What?!

Why not?

The people I wrote about
are mad at me for what I wrote.

And you're mad at me
because I didn't write enough.

And even if I had, you'd be
mad at me for what I wrote.

There's just no winning.

But The Gazette --
Folks count on it.

Then they can find
somebody else.

- Oh, Dorothy.
- Loren, I've made up my mind.

My friends are just
too important to me.

You know, Horace,
you were right.

- What?
- Dorothy doesn't tell

everything right.

She says I freed myself
from my contract with Hank.

But I didn't do it
all by myself.

- You helped me.
- I didn't do anything.

I just stood by and watched.

You did.
That's just right.

You stood by me.

Do you think I would have had
the guts to rip up that contract

if I didn't have you?

But I-I should have done it
for you.

A real man would have found
a way to pay it off or --

Just because you
didn't have the money

and you didn't fight Hank,

that doesn't mean
you're not a real man.

Dorothy, Horace and I need
to thank you.

You've done us a favor.

- She did?
- I did?

Your book, it brought out
something in the open

that we needed to set straight.

I don't know what we would have
done if we hadn't read it.

She's right.
Thank you, Dorothy.

I'm glad.

Do you -- you want me
to post that letter?

Yes, please.

Howdy.

Thank you.

Robert E., I've never seen
the café so busy.

Ever since that book came out,

all these new folks want
to try Grace's food.

And sample her hospitality,
I imagine.

I was looking forward

to some of her cider myself
and saying hello.

Uh, well, now is not, uh,
a good time.

She's not in a talking mood.

Roped me into serving up.

Robert E.

Just hold your horses.
Here's your meat loaf.

- I ordered pot roast.
- No, you didn't.

- I ought to know what I ordered.
- Does that look like pot roast?

This is not what I do.

Well, it's good of you
to pitch in.

"Pitch in."

If I wasn't here, the food
would just sit back there.

She don't want to see anybody.

Sully told me.

She's still feeling poorly?

No, I'm feeling poorly.
She's being ornery.

I've had enough of it.

This is your café.
I got a business of my own.

Robert E.,
you know how busy I am.

Well, why do you think
you're so busy?

Because you're a great cook
and a good and gracious woman,

just like Dorothy wrote.

She also wrote that --

You think that matters
to these folks?

Now, come on,
sugar, look at them.

They're here because
of who you are,

not who you're not.

Come on.

You know who you are?

You're the only woman in
this town who's married to me.

And you're the only man in town

lucky enough
to be married to me.

That's the truth.

I'm sorry, Dr. Mike.
I seem to be all out.

You can't argue
with popularity.

No, I guess you can't.

It's funny, uh,
how we see ourselves,

it sometimes blinds us
to the way other folks see us.

May I help?

Sure.

I'll dry!

Thank you, Brian,
we'll be fine.

I don't have to help?

Let's go check the bird feeder.

But we already...

Colleen, I owe you an apology.

I shouldn't have spoken
to Dorothy about you.

I was wrong.

Will you forgive me?

Are you going to forgive
Dorothy?

Well, that's between Dorothy
and me,

just as anything you'd say to me
would be between us.

I promise.

All right?

All right.

Ma?

I'm late for my monthly.

I didn't tell you because I read
it means you can be...

But I haven't done anything.

Colleen.

And then I got these headaches.

Colleen, women can be late
for lots of reasons

that are nothing to worry about,
especially young women.

Why, it happened to me
when I was your age.

I know it can be frightening,

but it doesn't mean
there's anything wrong.

Then what makes it happen?

Often, being upset.

The way you felt about the book

could have made you upset,
in the first place,

and then worrying about it
could have made it worse.

But what about the headaches
and not being hungry?

And the sleeplessness?

All of that could have been
caused by just being upset.

Worrying about a book
can make all that happen?

And worse.

Well, um, writings like putting
a message in a bottle

and tossing it out
into the ocean.

You don't know
where it's gonna end up.

But when somebody picks it up,
and it has meaning for them,

there's nothing
like that feeling.

It's very powerful.

I didn't know how powerful.

All your friends
must be very excited

at the prospect of being read
about all over the country.

I wanted them to be.

I wanted so much to please them,
to give them back something

for all they've given me.

What's your next book
going to be about?

Any chance of getting a scoop
for Collier's?

I can't tell you
how flattering that is.

But there's not going
to be a next book.

I never counted on folks --

on friends getting hurt.

And that was my fault.

I-I didn't think things through
like I should have.

So I've decided
that there are other ways

to live my life besides sitting
inside holding a pen.

A fine time
to come to your senses --

after the damage is done.

So, you didn't like the book?

I never thought
I'd live to see the day

people got paid for writing
half-baked gossip.

- You're right about that.
- Yeah, you got that.

Some things ought
to stay private.

- Yeah, that's right.
- That's the truth.

I used to think that, as well.

But I've come to realize that
many things do the most harm

when they're hidden.

There's a difference between
gossip and communication.

Dorothy's book
has taught us how to --

to talk about things,
to look at things honestly.

She's done a lot of good,
at least for me and my family.

She's done a lot of good
for us all.

Seen the hot springs?

Finest in the West.

The train can bring people
in from Denver

to go to the hot springs.

Thank you
for standing up for me.

Coming from you...

You can't stop writing,
Dorothy.

You're a writer.
That's who you are.

I know that as surely
as I know that I'm a doctor.

When I had my cancer,

I asked you not to tell a soul,
and you didn't.

I should have talked to you
about my book before --

It's not the same.

You're not a doctor or a priest.

You're a journalist.

It's your job to tell the truth
as you see it.

You must keep writing.

Dorothy, I'd be honored

if you would inscribe this
for me.

"For Michaela...

who showed me the way.

Our friendship is like
a light in the window

on a dark night."

Keep it.