All language subtitles for The.Middle.S03E13.1080p.WEB-DL.DD+.5.1

'CROWS CAWNG]

- Well, she looked good.
- She really did.

I think she looked pretty.

- She had less wrinkles lying down.
- I never saw her without her glasses.

- Or a cloud of smoke around her.
FRANKIE: Heh, yeah.

Look, Aunt Ginny lived along, full life
and she died in her sleep.

But I think we can all
take comfort in that.

How is that comforting?
I sleep every night.

I'd be more comforted
if she died in a hang-gliding accident.

No, in your sleep
is what you're shooting for.

You just close your eyes
and never wake up.

You never even know.

You never even know?

- The point is, she looked good.
- She really did.

- And she's in a beautiful spot.
- She really is.

I'm never ending up in a place like that.
I'll tell you that now.

If you figure out how to avoid it,
let us know.

Already did. I'm gonna be frozen.

- You're gonna be frozen?
- Ew, Axl.

Relax. Not my whole body.
Just gonna freeze my head.

You're not freezing your head.

What? Think about it.
I'm pretty awesome.

If I go, the world's gonna want me back.
So I'll just freeze my head.

When they come up with a cure for
whatever I died of, they'll unfreeze me.

That's creepy.

How can you be sure your head
will get put back on your right body?

If I were you, I'd want my head
to be put on somebody else's body.

Hey, that's a good idea.

If you go before me, I'm gonna freeze
your head and put it on a dude's body.

- Mom.
- Nobody's putting anyone's head...

-...no anyone else's body.
- No, he will. He'll do it.

And you won't be here
and you won't be able to stop him.

Promise you won't freeze
your sister's head...

...and put it on somebody else's body.

- I don't know that I can make that promise.
- See? You won't be here.

- You won't be able to enforce it.
- Fine, we'll put it in our will.

- Heh. You guys have a will?
- Of course, we do.

We scribbled on a napkin, "If we die,
Frankie's sister gets the kids."

- That's our will.
- We don't listen to you.

What makes you think we're gonna
pay attention to your death napkin?

La-Ia-Ia-Ia-Ia-Ia,
I don't wanna talk about this.

Did we seriously not make a will?
I thought we bought...

...that Johnnie Cochran
Make-Your-Own-Will floppy disk.

I don't have to live with Lucy?

Promise me I don't have to live
with Lucy.

The bank will take the house,
if they wait that long.

The rest of our vast holdings
will be divided equally among our heirs.

Stop it, stop it, stop it. This is not appropriate
to be talking about.

- I call their dresser.
- Why? You don't need a dresser.

- You're a head. You don't have clothes.
- Neither do you.

- You're a head on a dude's body.
- Mom, he's gonna do it.

I told you,
he's still gonna freeze my head.

Don't worry, Sue, I'll be here.
I'll make sure.

- Thank you.
- Unless you die in your sleep.

- Mom.
- The point is, it was a lovely service.

And today is not about us,
it's about Aunt Ginny...

...and remembering all the good things
about her.

It really is.

Oh, I know.
She used to make the best cheesecake.

- Really?
FRANKIE: Oh, sure.

She got the recipe
off a box of graham crackers.

She let me sit on the counter
and I always got the first bite.

AXL: I'm hungry.
- Can we stop and get cheesecake?

AXL & SUE: Yeah.
- No, no.

Nobody's stopping. People are gonna
bring fond over to the house.

- Why?
- When somebody dies...

-...you're not supposed to cook.
- Why not?

Because you're not supposed to cook
when you're sad.

Are you sad all the time, Mom?

Yes.

But the point is, I'm especially sad today
because Aunt Ginny died...

...and it's a sad day.

I thought we were happy
because she died in her sleep.

It's a happy sad day. We're grateful
because she lived along life.

She's in a pretty place.
She died in her sleep.

Can we please stop saying that?

Oh, I remember something else.
She once met Patton.

She did? Wow, cool. Very cool.

You have no idea who Patton is,
do you?

Give me a hint.

Oh, my God. That's pathetic.

You're gonna graduate
and you don't even know who Patton is?

Well, I can amaze you
with stuff I don't know.

This napkin
that says I have to live with Lucy--

Nobody's living with Lucy.

Nobody's going anywhere.

Everyone is staying exactly as they are
right here, right now, forever.

The point is,
she was a nice lady who looked good...

...died in her sleep, lived along life...

...and is in a pretty place, and met Patton
and made a hell of a cheesecake.

And we'll miss her.

We really will.

[ALL SIGH]

FRANKIE: With Aunt Ginny gone,
I was worried about Aunt Edie.

We couldn't exactly count on Doris
to be her sole support system.

Aunt Edie? Hey.

[FRANKIE CHUCKLES]

I brought you a few things.

Ooh, ho-ho.

So how you doing?

You know, Frankie,
I'm actually doing pretty well.

Oh, that's so great.
I know it's been a tough week.

Yep. Tough, tough week.

Aw. Do you want me
to make you a sandwich?

Oh, you've done enough.

How about I make you a sandwich?

- Are you sure?
Absolutely. I'm fine.

Ginny?
Want me to make you a sandwich?

Hey, how's Aunt Edie doing?

Oh, she's doing great.

It's like it never happened.

Probably because in her mind,
it didn't.

- Oh, no.
- Oh, yes.

I had to tell her Aunt Ginny died again.
It was as bad as the first time.

At least there was vodka.

Well, I hope you saved a little for her.

Uh, not much. Oh, shunt.

You had a meet today?
Sorry I missed it.

Yeah, well, it wasn't my best. You're
coming to the one next week, right?

At halftime, we're gonna do
a really edgy "Macarena."

I don't know if I can, honey.
I have a ton of stuff to do.

File the death certificate, figure out
what we're gonna do about Aunt Edie.

I am so wiped out,
I can't even look at all--

Oh, did somebody bring lasagna?

Okay, here are my top picks
of the bereavement fond.

Lemon bars are wicked good.
Macaroni salad was a solid six.

But whoever brought
that giant cookie, ugh, it was nasty.

Axl, that wasn't a cookie.

That was my Indiana dough map project
for school.

Damn it, Axl,
you ate your brother's project?

Why'd he put it on the counter
with bereavement fond?

I didn't.

I put it on the counter and people
put the bereavement food around it.

Pfft. Whatever. I think I did you
a favor anyway. It needed sugar.

It didn't have sugar, Axl,
because it wasn't fond.

What am I supposed to do now? Tell my
teacher my brother ate my homework?

If she had Axl, she'll buy it.

You're just gonna have
to make me a new one.

Axl, your mom's got enough
to worry about right now.

You're the one that ate his project,
you're in charge of making a new one.

Oh, my God. This is so unfair.

If you guys don't want me to eat stuff,
you gotta say so.

You should know my first impulse
is to always eat things.

We know where it's at
Gonna pin them to the mat, Jack

Go-

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

That's the match!
And the meet goes to Logansport.

What happened? Is it over?

Our team blows.
That's what happened.

Wait, Becky, you can't go.

We still have to do the Spirit Bridge.

We mustn't fret the loss
against Logansport.

-'Tis God's will.
- No, 'tisn't, Ruth.

We can't let God take the flak for this.
It's my fault.

I couldn't bring my usual spirit
and the team suffered.

Sorry.

My aunt died.

I apologize for my lack of spirit.
Death in the family.

Spirit down.

Sn really, really sorry.

I'm sorry about your aunt.
My aunt died in Delaware.

We didn't go to the funeral.
I didn't know her that well.

Oh.

Are you gonna go through the Spirit Bridge?
My arms are getting kind of tired.

- So how much salt was in it?
- I don't know. Mom did it.

You know how much flour?
How much flour?

- I'd say probably about four bags.
- How much did you use before?

I told you, I wasn't really watching.
Mom did it.

- Were there instructions or anything?
- Probably.

Ugh, Brick, you gotta start paying
more attention to your assignments...

...if you wanna get a decent grade.
Sean told me our teacher said that.

Sue. Wow, this is so weird. I've never
seen you here after school before.

I know.
I've never had an after-school activity.

- I'm a late-bus girl now.
- Well, I'm glad you're here...

...because something very interesting
happened in the locker room today.

- Really?
- somebody on the team...

...asked if you had a boyfriend
because he--

What I'm about to tell you
is really exciting. --likes you.

What? Are you serious?

- What somebody said they like me?
- It's Matt.

Really? Oh, wow! Who's Matt?

Little powerhouse with tremendous
strength and long eyelashes.

Ah! Oh, my God. If he's who I think he is,
I think he's cute.

As your former first boyfriend...

...I want you to know
what we had was special.

But I encourage you to fly and be free
to explore this with my blessing.

Oh, Brad, you are truly the best former
first boyfriend a girl could ever have.

Wait. He's not the one
who threw up at the last meet, is he?

Nuh-uh.

- Aah! This is gonna be so awesome!
- I know.

[BOTH LAUGH]

Ha.

- Sn we're supposed to cook it?
- I'm guessing.

- How hot?
- I'd say about 2000 degrees.

- It only goes to 450.
- That's probably fine then.

Okay, wait a minute,
hang on, hold the phone.

- Your brother's a genius.
- You ate my dough Indiana.

- I highly doubt that.
- No, seriously, this is perfect.

Got brownie mix.
Everything's on the box.

It's got all the ingredients,
says how long to cook it. Boom, done.

- Gentlemen. How's it going?
- Good, good.

I'm telling you, Mom makes a lot
of things harder than they need to be.

You know, that could apply to anything.
I don't really need the details.

Okay. Heh.

Hey, what are you doing here?
Thought you went over to Aunt Edie's.

Please, Mike, can't you go today?

I told her Aunt Ginny died six times
this week. And I'm not proud of this.

The last time, to shake it up,
I told her it was a hang-gliding accident.

- Ugh. I just got home.
- Come on. It won't be that bad.

It's like ripping a Band-Aid off,
putting it back on.

And ripping it off again
and putting it back on.

She can't stay there alone.
We gotta figure something out.

I know. I know.
So how does this sound?

"Kind, responsible caregiver
wanted to share lovely home...

...with demented octogenarian
who is old of body but young in spirit.

Drinking and smoking a plus.

Must be willing to diaper
emphysemic dog and possibly others."

You're lucky the economy's
in the toilet.

Now, while the oven is heating up...

...we dump the dirty bowls in the sink
for Mom to deal with, and we're done.

I'm good at this cooking thing.
I should have a show.

Did you take the quilt out of there?

No, we thought we'd cook with the quilt
in there. Duh, Dad, we're not idiots.

[SCOFFS]

Oh, hey, you just getting home?

Yep. After-school activities.
Late bus, you know?

Sn, Dad,
you're not gonna believe this.

Brad came up to me on the stairs
and said the most shocking thing to me.

He said he has a huge secret.

- Uh, Sue, I don't think it's that big a secret.
- No, it is.

Guess what he said.

A boy likes me.

- Brad said that?
- Yeah, he said a boy likes me.

- That's what Brad said?
- Right.

Uh-huh. Now, when he said that,
was that Brad talking or you talking?

Heh. Dad, there's really only one way
to take this.

- Brad said a boy likes me.
- I don't think so.

Who's me in this scenario?

- Me?
-"You" you or "you" Brad?

- What?
- Let's say you wrote it in a bank.

Would it say,
”A boy likes me,' said Brad"?

Why would a boy like Brad?

Why would Brad say a boy likes him?

That doesn't make any sense.
Forget it, I'm just gonna tell Mom.

Good plan.

[SIGHS]

Mom? Guess what.

Brad said a boy likes me.

Did he say, "A boy likes me,"
or did he say a boy likes you?

Me, Mom. Me as in Sue.

What is so confusing about this?

A boy likes you, wow.

- And you like him too?
- Duh, he likes me.

Yeah, I know he likes you,
but do you like him back?

- You heard he likes me, right?
- Yeah, I got that, but do you like him?

I'm not following.

Just because a boy likes you
doesn't mean you have to like him back.

I know. I just hope I do.

Oh, yeah. Me too.

It's just that you're gonna have
a million guys beating down your door.

So you don't have to jump
at the first one.

Well, he's not the first, Mom.
I had a whole relationship with Brad.

Or even the second one.

If you like this guy, great. I don't want
you to be one of those girls...

...who's so obsessed with a boyfriend,
that they forget about what they want.

Make yourself happy first.

Make yourself happy first.

Wow. I sort of felt a tingle
when you said that.

That's deep. That's Oprah deep.

- Oh, that was Oprah.
- Oh.

Barn, done.

Axl, this isn't Indiana.
It's just a big rectangle.

Fine, so we just cut off this wedge
right here.

[BRICK SIGHS]

You cut it too far. Here, give me that.

The southwest tip isn't right.

Wow. We should make brownies more.
Ours are way better than Mom's.

- I can't turn this in.
- Good.

Hey.

Hey, Aunt Edie, just so you know...

...we have interviews lined up for you
this week, okay?

Oh, I just hope I get the job.

Forget it.

- Aha. Is this what you're looking for?
- Okay.

Let's keep the cigarette away
from the old, dry documents, okay?

Uh, yeah, this looks
like the birth certificate.

No, wait. This can't be right.

This says she was born in 1911.

- Yes, that's right.
- No, it can't be.

If Aunt Ginny was born in 1911,
that means she was a hundred.

- There's no way she was a hundred.
- Ginny!

You're a hundred, right?

[SIGHS]

A hundred? Wow, that's pretty cool.

FRANKIE:
No, it's not cool.

It's not cool at all, Mike.
You're missing the point.

She turned a hundred
and did we have a big cake for her...

...or her send picture to Willard Scott?
No. What did we do?

Um, let me think. Oh, yeah.

Nothing.

We are the worst people ever.

Frankie, you did a ten for Aunt Ginny.

Gave her foot rubs,
took her to the liquor store.

You sucked fluid out of her dog's nose
with a dropper, for God's sake.

You can't beat yourself up.
She knew how much you loved her.

No, no, no.
This is about more than just Aunt Ginny.

This is what we do.
We float everything.

We float anniversaries.
We float Easter.

I can't even remember
when we last celebrated your birthday.

The problem is,
you think all those things are important.

See, if you're brought up with no
expectations, you're never disappointed.

Yeah, but we just say "We're busy"
and "an is not a good time."

And we float and we float
and we push away all the fun stuff...

...so we have time
for all the crappy stuff. Look at this.

Memorial Day,
said we were gonna barbecue...

...ended up doing the laundry.

Brick's winter concert.

There was a chance
that could've been fun.

What's this? Jill and Ryan's wedding.
July 8th.

Last July 8th. Looks like
it would have been a good one too...

-...in a real ballroom in Indianapolis.
- What?

[GASPS]

Oh, my God.
There were meal choices, Mike.

I would've had chicken.
You would've had beef.

They would've had a DJ.

I would've gotten drunk
and worn your tie as a headband.

These are the moments, Mike.

- We're missing our life.
- We've been busy. We got a lot of kids.

Are we, Mike?
Are we really that busy?

Because somehow we still manage
to catch every single episode...

...of Celebrity Rehab.
- Hey, keep TV out of this.

- We need TV. We got nothing else.
- Yeah, well, no more.

Where are you going?

Sue's wrestling meet is today
and I said I was too busy.

I can't be there for my one and only
daughter because of paperwork?

Uh-uh. I am not missing out
on one more hour of joy.

I'm going.

But tape Celebrity Rehab.

There's no more brownie mix.

Hey. What about this?

Pancake mix?
That'd make a good Indiana.

We love pancakes.
It'd never make it till tomorrow.

We just mix some din in the batter.
That way we don't eat it.

Genius.

Just goes to show you.
Put syrup on anything, it'll taste good.

So, what new?
There's no flour, no brownie mix...

...no more pancake mix,
and my project's due tomorrow.

Okay. Stay with me.

Brilliant idea forming. We order a pizza
and cut that into the shape of Indiana.

- Axl, we like pizza.
- So we order two.

One to turn in, one to eat.
We're not stupid.

[CHATTERING]

Hi there, Matt.

You're Matt, right? I'm Sue Heck.

- I know who you are, Sue.
- Oh, heh.

Okay, excellent.

Uh, well, um, listen.

Brad told me that you--

And I don't know if this is true,
but that you maybe sort of like me?

One hundred percent true.

Really?

Well, first of all, thank you.

That's so nice.

But just because you like me doesn't
mean I automatically like you back.

As a woman of the '10s, I strongly
believe that liking is a two-way street.

And I have to make myself happy
first.

- I'm sorry.
- Okay.

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

AXL: Check this out. It's a cheese river.
- No way I'm not getting an A on this.

An A? They're gonna have to make up
a whole new grading system.

No one is doing this.

We are revolutionizing
the state relief map industry.

When! Ha, ha.

[AXL SIGHS]

Do we have to write the date on it?

Let me check.
I've got the assignment right here.

- Uh -oh.
- What'?

I have Texas.

What? Let me see that. "Each student
will be assigned a different state.

Your state is the Lone Star State."
Are you kidding me?

Are you freaking kidding me?

Now you know why Mom
gets so frustrated with me.

[WHISPERS]
Frustrated.

[AXL SIGHS]

Okay, I'll just order another pizza.

No, forget it.

I'm exhausted and full. I'll just take
the incomplete and call it a day.

So are you cool
if I eat the Amish country?

- Have at it.
- Ha.

Sue.

Ah! You made it.

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

I like you, Sue Heck. And I'm not
gonna take no for an answer.

[YELLS]

[BOYS GRUNTING]

BOYS [CHANTING]:
Sue Heck

Sue Heck, Sue Heck
Sue, Sue, Sue

FRANKIE:
Sue couldn't believe it.

There's nothing she appreciated more
than a grand gesture...

...since she had done plenty of them
herself.

Sue Heck

[ALL CHEERING]

I like you back, Matt. I like you a lot.

[MOUTHS]
I like him.

FRANKIE:
So Sue got her first boyfriend.

We", second if you count Brad.

But most importantly,
1 had been there to see it.

The thing is, there's no map that tells
you how to make your way through life...

...which moments to stop and enjoy,
and which ones to speed on by.

And if there was one,
Ax! and Brick would've eaten it.

Hey. What's going on?

We're celebrating
Aunt Ginny's hundredth birthday.

Really? Aw.

ALL [SINGING]: Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday dear Aunt Ginny

Happy birthday to you

Mom, you do the honors.

- Aw, this is 50--
- Hold on.

I have been informed
that we floated Axl's last birthday.

Yeah.

ALL [SINGING]: Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday to you

FRANKIE: That night,
we celebrated five birthdays...

...two anniversaries, an Easter,
and a graduation.

1 think Aunt Ginny would've liked it.

Oh, {just remembered something else
about her:

She loved a good party.

[English - us - SDH]