All language subtitles for Bewitched.S08E17.Serenas.Richcraft.Imprint.1080p.BluRay.FLAC2.0.H.264-BTN_track5_[eng]

Hello.

Oh, hi, Larry.

Uh, yeah. Yeah, he's ready.
You want to talk to him?

You're kidding.

Yeah, sure, I'll tell him.
Bye-bye. That was Larry.

He and Mr. Woolcott will be over to pick
you up in a few minutes, in guess what?

What?
In Mr. Woolcott's helicopter.

You're kidding.

That's what I said.

Well, I guess if you're stuck with being
one of the ten richest men in the world,

you might as well live like it.
Where are you going?

He wants to show us the site of the
newest in the chain of Woolcott towers.

There's a chance we may be
handling the advertising for all his hotels.

Wow.

Well, he said they'd be right
over, but this is ridiculous.

Serena.
Hi, Cuz.

Serena, since when
do you use a doorbell?

Or for that matter,
a door?

Since when is it good manners
not to say hello?

Since...

Hello, Serena.

And what are you
doing here?

When you're exiled,
you have to go some place.

What do you mean, exiled?

Oh, uh, I forgot.

I told the cab driver
you'd pay the fare, Sammy.

Cab driver?
Cab driver?

That's right.

Uh, sweetheart, why don't you pay the
cab driver and I'll find out what's going on.

Come on, Serena.

What do you mean, exiled?

Contessa Pirhana
blew her cool. Uh-oh.

Yeah.

How was I supposed to know
that Otto was her fiance?

What did Pirhana do?

The old bat
took me by surprise

and zapped away
all my powers.

How'd you get here? She
zapped me onto the freeway.

It was humiliating
and suffocating.

How can you stand
all that smog?

Serena, why don't you
settle in Switzerland?

They don't have
a smog problem.

Darrin, this is serious.
Serena's lost her powers.

You bet it's serious.
She can't stay here.

Sweetheart,
where is your compassion?

We can't
throw her out.

I mean, if she's
without her powers,

she's going to need some
mortal basic training.

[Darrin] Then let's ship her
off to Fort Bragg.

Sam, powers or no powers,

if she stays here, we're living
in a potential disaster area.

Oh, that must be
Larry and Mr. Woolcott.

Sam, any place but here.

Wow.

Who's that cat?

Not bad-lookin'.

Must be rich, huh?
Forget it, Serena.

Oh, but, cousin.

If my witchcraft
is temporarily zonked,

what better substitute
than rich-craft?

I mean, there's not much difference
between witchcraft and rich-craft.

Except maybe you fly
a little slower.

Elizabeth Montgomery in...

Bewitched.

But, Sammy,

it would just be a little harmless
research on mortal men.

Serena, you picked
the wrong guinea pig.

Mr. Woolcott is
strictly business.

But, Cuz, if Durwood is going
to temporarily support me,

the least I can do is take
an interest in his business.

Serena, you may stay with us

as long as you promise
to stay out of Darrin's way.

That will be my pleasure.

[Tabitha] Mommy,
Adam's eating my crayons.

Oh, little darling.

How did
a nice little witch like me

get into
a mess like this?

"Woolcott Towers,
above the rest."

"Woolcott Towers, above
the rest." Sounds good, Darrin.

Yeah, come on in.

Now, Harrison, would you like
a drink before we start?

Yeah, good idea. Hi, beautiful
people. You, too, Dumbo.

Dumbo?
Uh, it's a nickname.

A term of, uh, endearment.

If you say so.
Hi, cotton-top.

Hi, Serena.

And who be you?

Serena, uh, may I present
Harrison Woolcott.

Uh, Harrison, Serena is
Sam's... Younger cousin.

Serena. How do you
do? How do you do?

Serena, why don't
you go upstairs... Say!

I'll bet you're
Harrison Woolcott

of the Woolcott Towers,
right, Mr. Woolcott?

May I call you Harrison?

Whatever you call me,
I'll be sure to answer.

Terrific.

Now, you just put your
little self right down there.

You know,
the Woolcott Towers have

always been my home
away from home.

Oh, groovy.
Oh, yeah.

New York, Tokyo, Istanbul...

But my favorite

is in San Francisco.

San Francisco?
Uh-huh.

Well, I'm afraid you're a
little young for that hotel.

I'm not too young
for any hotel.

[Harrison] Yes, but you see,
that burned down 50 years ago.

Huh?

She means her mummy
used to stay there.

Uh, Harrison, I'd like you
to meet my wife, Samantha.

How do you do?
How do you do?

Please go on.

Well, you see,
they were...

Well, I guess you'd like to
go over the ad concepts now.

You guess wrong.

You always travel
with your husband?

Never with my husband.

She means she's never
been married.

Yes. She never settles down long
enough to meet anyone. It's go, go, go.

Speaking of go, I better
get Serena to the airport, uh,

before she misses her plane for
Switzerland. She's not gonna miss anything.

Darrin, don't let her
go to Switzerland.

Oh, I can't talk her out
of it. Can anyone try?

Try, Dumbo.

Uh, Sam...
What?

I think we need
some ice for the drinks.

Excuse us.
Excuse us.

Sam, do you realize
what's going on in there?

Yes. She's flirting
like any normal girl.

A, she is not a normal girl.

B, what she's flirting with
is my future.

If she gets involved with Woolcott,
it's bound to end up a catastrophe.

Now, I am not running a home
for delinquent witches.

I want Serena
out of this house.

I'm glad you feel
that way, Dumbo.

Because Harrison has asked me
to go boating with him this afternoon.

I think I can discourage him.
I doubt it.

Oh, oh, Sammy,

oh, he is charming.

Spelled R-I-C-H.

Don't hassle me, Sammy.

Now, this is the, uh,
main salon.

Or saloon,
as you prefer.

I think "saloon" is less pretentious
and more fun, don't you?

Oh...

What lovely paintings.
Thank you.

Picasso, Matisse...

Cute.

"Cute." That's an odd
thing to say about van Gogh.

Maybe Irving van Gogh,
not Vincent.

Are you saying this
is a copy? Isn't it?

I asked you first.

Of course it's a copy.

And so are these.
Didn't you know?

Yes, I know.

Oh,

how clever of you
to hang copies.

The salt air would have ruined
the original canvasses,

which I hope you have.

Yes, I have.

You know what's extraordinary,
is nobody else ever suspected.

How did you know?

Well, uh,

take the van Gogh,
for instance. Hmm.

Look at those brushstrokes.

Vincent never caressed
a canvas. He attacked it.

Oh, he was an angry young man,
I can tell you.

Sounds like you speak
from personal experience.

Oh, you can't get
more personal.

What?

I, uh,

I mean,

I did my thesis on van Gogh. Oh.

I really immersed myself
in his life.

Here, let me.

Oh, thank you.

I'm not very bright
about some things.

Only about the things
that matter, eh?

Mmm.

Yummy.

Chateau Margaux 1957.

I don't think so.
My guess would be...

Chateau Lafite Rothschild
'45.

Well, what's the difference
so long as it's fermented?

Now, this Margaux...

Yes, it is, uh, Lafite '45.

That's amazing because the Captain
said was going to serve Margaux.

Just for that I'll have to
bust him to Corporal.

Oh.

Yes?

The cook would like to
see you in the galley, sir.

Oh, it must be about lunch.
Don't go away.

Not I.

"Close cover
before striking."

What are you doing?

Well, I was trying
to light a match.

Now, either I'm not
striking them hard enough,

or the matches are faulty.

You are one of the most
delightfully helpless creatures

I've ever met
in my life.

About some things, Harry.

Only about some things.

Now, let's talk
about you.

Is it true that you are one of
the ten richest men in the world?

Well, that was a matter of
timing. What do you mean?

Well, at the time
I was born,

my father happened to be one
of the ten richest men in the world.

Oh!

Where did you get
your education?

At Witches U.
Witches U?

Oh,

Oh, that's
my nickname for Vassar.

We had a witch for a dean.

Serena,

you're a remarkable girl.

You know, I feel that the
chemistry between us is very good.

And the biology
isn't bad, either.

I am going to
kill her, Sam.

I'm going to kill her and no
jury on earth will convict me.

They were
only gone three days.

And I'm thinking.

And I'm thinking.

She's up there right now, getting
dressed to meet him for lunch.

That'll probably be
another three days.

And what I'm thinking

is when Harrison meets Serena for
lunch, it won't be Serena he meets.

Who will it be?
Me.

I'm gonna take advantage of
Serena's delicate condition

and put her in the deep
freeze until after lunch.

Whatever Serena turned on,
I am gonna turn off.

Hey, don't tell me
another thing. I love it,

and I've got to
get to the office.

Mmm, thank you.

Hi, I ordered you
a martini.

Oh, thank you.

Well,

you look more beautiful
than the last time I saw you.

You just saw me
two hours ago.

It seems
more like two weeks.

Harrison...
Hmm?

There's something I have to
say to you. Well, before you do,

Are you interested in
buried treasure? What?

Look under your napkin.

Go on.

Open it.

You have
got to be kidding.

Well, Tiffany's was
pretty serious about it.

They closed up for
the rest of the week.

Uh, look, buster.

We had a nice little cruise together,
but don't hang anything permanent on me.

I've heard of schizophrenia,
but this is ridiculous.

What happened to you?

Well, I was under
a spell on the yacht.

The full moon
reflecting on the water.

The balmy breezes blowing,
the stars in the sky.

There was no moon.
It was foggy.

And as for the balmy breezes,
we were in a squall most of the time.

Well, you've guessed
my problem.

I have these hallucinations.

I don't believe this.

Well, you better believe it.
And I have another problem.

A psychotic fear of money.

When I handle it,
I break out in hives.

Well, you don't have to handle
it. We'll let the help do that.

Harrison,

to put this as
nicely as I know how.

You and I, we're two ships
that passed in the night.

We tooted our whistles
at each other.

Now we must sail on.

Uh, waiter?

Yes, sir.

I'd like another drink, a double,
please, and one for the young lady.

What lady?

How about a cup of
black coffee instead?

Yes,
it's a very good idea.

She is the most remarkable
bundle of delightful contradictions

that I have ever known.

This is a girl who can't unscrew
the top on a bottle of olives,

yet can read
the stars like Galileo.

She can't dial a telephone, but she
can tell you what went on in the bedroom

of Alexander Graham Bell
in 1902.

Now, that's heavy.

Well, doesn't that prove
she's kind of strange?

Sure, it's strange, but
it's like an exciting strange.

Oh, exciting.
Definitely exciting.

You know another thing that fascinates
me? She doesn't care about my loot.

They don't make
girls like that anymore.

On the other hand, just to turn
you down because you're wealthy

is a kind of
reverse prejudice.

And you wouldn't want to
have anything to do with a bigot.

Stephens, I don't want to
hear about

your hang-ups with
your wife's cousin.

I don't want to hear that. That's
between you and your psychiatrist.

I want to hear you say,
"Harrison, let's go back to my house

"and see if we can talk
some sense into Serena."

That's what I want to
hear you say.

Say it, Darrin. Say it.

All right, I'll say it. Harrison, why
don't we all go back to Darrin's house

and see if we can talk
some sense into Serena?

That's the way to say it.
Come on.

Compass point east
and west and north.

I beg the Contessa Pirhana
come forth.

You begged.

Sit down, Contessa.

No, thank you.

Aunt Hepzibah taught me that
sitting was a sign of weakness.

Contessa, it is unbecoming
to hold a grudge.

Yes, but so satisfying.

How many fiances do you
have? The usual, of course.

One...

Two.
Three...

Including Otto?

Yes, I gave him
another chance.

Okay.

Then why not give her
another chance, too?

Is she sufficiently
remorseful?

Oh, she's a real pussycat.

Aren't you, Serena?

Yes.

And one of these days
you are going to be my mouse.

As for you...

Oh, Harrison.

Hi, Darrin, Larry.
Sam.

Come in, there's somebody
I'd like you to meet.

Darrin, Mr. Tate,
Mr. Woolcott,

this is
the Contessa Pirhana.

[Harrison] How do you do,
Contessa? I'm happy to know you.

Did I say happy?

I meant enchanted.

Oh, okay. Oh,
okay, you've met her.

Now buzz off, Pirhana.
I don't need you anymore.

I have found my true love.

Excuse me, I have to ask
the Contessa something.

Would it be presumptuous
of me to ask

what you're doing in the
immediate future? Like tonight?

Now, now, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.

There's something freaky
going on here.

I'm having dinner with you.

Followed by an evening
of dancing, merry-making,

et cetera.

Et cetera.
Et cetera?

When do you pick me up?

I just did.

Why don't we start
the evening this afternoon?

Oh, now wait a minute,
Harrison.

Mr. Woolcott, please.

Serena, the Contessa and
I have to have a talk. Alone.

Come along.

You, too.

Okay. Which wise
witch pulled this stunt?

Well, don't look at me. I gave
up love spells in high school.

I'm taking the fifth.

He's attractive, isn't he?

You had your revenge,
Pirhana.

So, before you embark
on your night

of dancing, merry-making,
et cetera, undo your thing.

Party-pooper.

All right.

Repeat after me.

I am sorry, Contessa.

I'm sorry, Contessa.

Smile witch, laugh witch,
take your powers back, witch.

There.

Rare fun.

[Larry] Harrison,
that's a brilliant idea.

Harrison, we have so much
to look forward to.

Let's not waste one moment.

I'm hip. Let's go.

But we've got business to
discuss. Harrison, we would like...

This is business, too,
you know.

Would you mind dropping me
at my place? I'll get you a cab.

Sam.

Now we're right back
in the same mess.

Well, it was the only way I could get
Pirhana to take the spell off Serena.

Yeah. I guess anything's
worth getting rid of her.

Thanks a lot, superfink.

Sam.

Well?

Well! Mr. Woolcott.
Hi.

Come in.
Thank you.

How are you?

I'm all right.
I'm a little weary.

Yes, I can see that.

Hi, Harrison. Hi,
Darrin, how are you?

I went over your layouts and
they're super. Oh, thank you.

We got a deal.

We'll work out the details
when I get back, okay?

Get back?

Yeah, I'm gonna put out on the
boat for a couple of months. Rest up.

By the way, if you should
see Pirhana again,

will you tell her I'm sorry
that I freaked out?

Freaked out?

Yeah, well, the other night
when I took her out,

we, uh, we made the rounds,
you know, all the clubs.

And, I guess maybe I had
a little too much to drink.

Let's face it,
I was stoned out of my gourd.

What happened?

Well, we were dancing
cheek-to-cheek. It was nice, romantic,

music was playing softly,
and I was singing in her ear.

♪ Fly me to the moon ♪

The next thing I knew,
I was on my way.

Where?
To the moon.

Well, that must have
been some nightmare.

It was some kind of heavy trip,
whatever it was. Well, I'd better split.

Shh.

Just shh.