All language subtitles for Bewitched.S08E12.The.Eight.Year.Itch.Witch.Imprint.1080p.BluRay.FLAC2.0.H.264-BTN_track5_[eng]

Mmm.

Okay. Who's
the wise witch?

[Darrin] Sam,
did you call me? No.

What are these doing here? I
thought I left them in my briefcase.

What would you like
for breakfast?

In fact, I'm sure I left
them in my briefcase.

Sam, did you...
No, I didn't.

But I did.

Sam, since when did
your mother get the idea

that our marriage license
was her deed to my briefcase?

Is it wrong for a mother to
try to protect her little girl?

Mother, that's what I love
about your little visits.

You always bring
a ray of sunshine

into an otherwise
drab existence.

You're half right.

It certainly is
a drab existence.

Sam, I think
I'll skip breakfast.

Endora.
Hmm.

It's always a pleasure
to say goodbye to you.

Darrin. Mother.

Now that you have
invaded our privacy,

Would you like to
baby-sit tonight?

Oh.

Darrin and I are celebrating
the anniversary of our first date.

Must you rub it in?

Don't you care if
Durwood's briefcase

contains a gaggle
of centerfolds?

Oh, Mother.

In advertising, beautiful girls
are merely tools of the trade.

How can a witch of mine
be so naive?

[Endora sobbing] Mother.

What?

Models like that
are just routine.

Have you ever heard of a
syndrome peculiar to mortal men?

[Endora] The seven-year itch?

Seven years of marriage, and it's
off with the old and on with the new.

In case you hadn't noticed,

Darrin and I have been
married for 8 years.

You see? Durwood
can't do anything right.

He can do everything right.
I ought to know.

Lady, thou doth protest
too much, methinks.

Mother, thou doth
butt in too much, methinks.

Mother?

[Endora] What?

Are you going to baby-sit
with the kids tonight or not?

Of course, darling, I'll
be back in plenty of time.

Elizabeth Montgomery in...

Bewitched.

One Reori-ickory-anne,
Phillison, Follison, Nicholas John.

Queevy, quavy, English
navy, Stiglan, staglam.

Cat. C-A-T spells "cat."

Ophelia, my sweet.

Come catch a rat.

Ophelia.

As a familiar, you shouldn't
have too much trouble

getting familiar with a
mortal dud named Durwood.

No.

No.

No.

I'm sorry, gentlemen,
but she is just not here.

Mr. Burkeholder, we have to
have a cat lady on that tractor

before the regional
convention in Albany,

which, I hasten to
remind you, is tonight.

I must admit, we have seen
a lot of gorgeous creatures,

but I have not seen
that certain quality

we had in last year's
cat girl.

Yes?

[Betty] Mr. Stephens, there's
a young lady here to see you.

Uh, not now, Betty.

It's another model.

I think you ought to
see this one.

Okay, send her in.

Good afternoon.
My name is Ophelia.

A friend suggested I might
be perfect as your cat girl.

What's the trouble?
Cat got your tongue?

I don't know about
you fellows, but I,

I think we've found our girl.

She's perfect.

Well, I admit she looks good,
but shouldn't we check out...

Darrin, we
don't have much time,

and Mr. Burkeholder
likes what he sees.

So take Ophelia
down to the still lab

and get started
on the photos.

But, Larry, how can we be
convinced that she's... Just look.

Not at her, at him.

Now that's
pretty convincing.

Okay, Ophelia,

first we've got to
fit you in a costume

and then while we're
shooting the stills,

I'll brief you on tonight's
activities in Albany.

In Albany?
Mmm-hmm.

We're having the, uh, annual
sales convention up there.

I'll, uh, explain it
to you as we go.

Why don't you to try
leaning back against this.

Oh.

There.
Legs out?

Yeah, fine.
Okay.

That looks pretty good.

Okay, Chet,
she's all yours.

Okay. Now
watch the birdie.

Birdie? Where? Where?

Oh, right here.

Wow. That's it.

Okay, that's it.

Well, Darrin, you picked
the perfect model.

Thank you.

Well, actually, uh,
she picked us.

Yes, thanks to Darrin.

Let's take a break.

Would you like some
cream in your coffee?

No, just cream.

I'm on a diet.

Ophelia. Chet.

Well, how's
the crash program coming?

Just great. She's
terrific, Mr. Tate.

Yes, Mr. Stephens gives me
a great deal of confidence.

Uh, well, uh,
did Mr. Stephens

get the opportunity to brief
you on the convention tonight?

Oh, yes. I don't think there'll
be any trouble whatsoever.

Mr. Stephens puts me
so at ease

that his very presence is all I need to
overcome any stage fright I might have.

Uh, never mind, Ophelia.
You'll be just fine on your own.

On my own? You mean
you won't be there?

Well, no, you'll be in
the very capable hands

of Mr. Tate
and Mr. Burkeholder.

I think I'm having
an attack of panic.

Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Tate,

but without Mr. Stephens,
I'm afraid I'd make a mess of it.

I'd be as nervous as a cat.

Don't you worry
your head about it, Ophelia.

Darrin will be there.

Right, Svengali?

Uh, wrong.

Stephens, what gave you
the idea that

you didn't have to
go to Albany tonight?

Yeah, where'd you
get that idea?

Well, yesterday when you told me it
wouldn't be necessary for me to go.

Why would I tell you that,
when it's been planned all along?

All along?

Oh, I... I don't want to impose on
Mr. Stephens. He's been so kind.

I don't want to
inconvenience him in any way.

Believe me, Ophelia.
It's no inconvenience.

I'll try not to trouble you
in any way whatsoever.

What really bugs me is why I
keep giving in to Larry's ultimatums.

Larry's ultimatums are
merely a cry for help.

You know that, and that's
why you're going to Albany,

So don't worry about it.

We can celebrate
tomorrow night.

No.

I've got a better idea.

This stays here.

I'll fly back
right after the banquet.

I can be home easily
by midnight.

And we'll go out and have a
romantic, candlelit supper anyway.

That sounds great.

We'll still need
a sitter.

You haven't let your mother
off the hook, have you?

Oh, no. No, I...
I'm sure she's still around.

Good. Tell her
not to go away.

See you later.

Bye-bye.
Bye.

Oh, good heavens.

Well, did you get all that, or
would you like an instant replay?

First, he's hiding pictures.

Then he breaks a dinner date to be
with another woman in another city.

He will be back by midnight,
so you'll have to baby-sit after all.

Oh, guess what?
What?

Brace yourself for a famous
first from Darrin to you

"Don't go away."

[Larry] You couldn't have
made a more wonderful choice.

I don't know who deserves the
more credit, you or Stephens.

Or me.

Oh, Mr. Stephens deserves
all the credit.

Yeah, well, remember,
Ophelia. I'm right next door.

And, uh, I'm just down the
hall, in case you need anything.

And I'm on my way
to the airport.

I've gotta catch
the 11:00 plane.

Bon voyage. Ah,
congratulations, Ophelia.

You were just great.

Uh, see you tomorrow,
Larry. Mr. Burkeholder.

Good night.
Night.

Good night.

Uh, Ophelia, I know a nice
little restaurant just outside town

where we could go
for a nightcap.

Well, Mr. Burkeholder,
I'm a little tired.

All I want to do is go
and curl up and sleep

so that I can be bright-eyed
and bushy-tailed in the morning.

But you're bright-eyed
and bushy-tailed right now.

Mmm, in the morning.

In the morning.

In the morning, what?

Good night.

Mr. Stephens' room,
please.

Hello.

Hello, Mr. Stephens.

This is reservations
at Mohawk Airlines.

Your 11:00 flight for New
York has been canceled.

Canceled? Why?

We're completely socked in.

Socked in?

It's clear as a bell here.

Soup there.

And we don't expect it
to lift until morning.

Yeah. Well, if it does lift,
will you call me right away?

Yes, sir. Yes, sir.

Hi, sweetheart.
How'd it go?

Everything went great
but the weather.

The airport fogged in, and I
guess I'm stuck here for the night.

Oh, well, sweetheart, you can't
do anything about the weather.

Maybe I can get
a car and drive down.

Sweetheart, that's
ridiculous. It's a 3-hour drive.

I'll see you
in the morning.

Yeah, I guess you're right.
Well, love you.

Love you, too. Bye-bye.

Let me guess.

Another excuse.
Another delay.

Darrin can't come home tonight
because the airport's fogged in.

Uh, Mother.

You haven't,
by any chance,

been horsing around with
the weather, have you?

If anybody's been horsing
around, it's probably Durwood.

You didn't answer
my question.

I did not horse around
with the weather.

Witches honor.

But I'll give Durwood
credit for one thing.

He has no imagination.

What's that
supposed to mean?

The weather is
so easily checked.

Mother, you're beginning
to bug me.

When are you ever going to
start showing some good sense?

Mother, would you like to look
at someone showing good sense?

Yes.

Okay.

Then take a look at me not
paying any attention to you. Ha.

I have an errand
to run. Ta-ta.

Uh, yes? You called
for room service, sir?

Well, no, I didn't...

Oh, hello,
Mr. Stephens.

I thought you were
going back to New York.

So did I, but my flight
was canceled.

Oh, isn't that a shame?

Were you ordering
a nightcap?

No. I'm sorry. You must
have the wrong room.

Yes, sir.

Mr. Stephens,

I can't tell you
how relieved I am.

About what?

Well, I am sorry
that your flight was canceled,

but it certainly is
comforting that you'll be here

for tomorrow's
television interviews.

I'm afraid I won't be here. I'll be
flying back first thing in the morning.

Oh.

Um, well, then maybe we can
discuss the questions tonight.

There are a few places I'd
like to scratch. I mean "cut."

Sure. Come on in.

Maybe we should
have a nightcap.

Okay, I'll call
room service.

No, no, no. I'll go
get mine. I have some.

Uh, would you ring
Mr. Larry Tate, please?

Hello?

Oh, hi, Larry.
I know I was leaving, but,

the airport got socked in,
and I'm stuck here for the night.

Uh, look, uh,
would you come over?

Why?

Well, Ophelia wants to go over the
material for her television interviews and,

well, the fact is, I... I would
rather not be alone with her.

I think we've got
a bad connection.

I thought I heard you say come over
because you didn't want to be alone with her.

That's exactly what I said.

Darrin, you're not well.

I'll be right over.

[Ophelia] Hello.
Oh, hi.

Thanks, Ophelia,
for bringing this.

Hi, uh, Larry.

Hi.

Ophelia, uh,
you remember Larry Tate.

Oh, yes. How nice
to see you, Mr. Tate.

Hi.

Ophelia wanted to go over
some of the, uh, questions

she'll be asked at
the television interviews.

If they need a little, uh...

Larry?

Uh, of course,
if they need a little, uh...

A little what?
Fixing.

If they need a little
fixing, who am I to argue?

To your very
good health, Ophelia.

I have a weather report
from Albany.

"Fair and warmer and clear."

Mother, I'm sure if that's true,
Darrin has a logical answer.

Sure. And I'm Snow White
and the seven dwarfs.

Mother, I am going to get
Aunt Hagatha to baby-sit,

while we go to Albany.

We? Why we?

Well, no matter what the weather
is there, Darrin is lost in a fog,

and I want to
find out whose.

Present company included.

So if these changes will make you
happy, we'll be glad to make them.

[Ophelia] Thank you,
Mr. Stephens.

Shall I make us all
another drink?

Thank you.

I thought you'd never ask.

Oh, on second
thought, Larry,

I can handle the rest of
the evening by myself.

Why don't you run back
to your room?

Why? I thought
we were about...

I'll be glad to
go to my room.

After all, two's company,
three's a crowd.

Larry, where
are you going?

To my room.

What for?

I don't know.

But I don't think
It was my idea.

As a matter of fact, I think
I'll have that second drink.

But not before
I take a nap.

All right.

Come out, come out,
wherever you are.

I should have known.

Ophelia, doing
what comes naturally.

Samantha, how nice
to see you.

You could have knocked.

Never mind about her.
What about him?

Caught in the act.

In what act?

If you don't know,
it's too late to teach you.

Ophelia, would you care to tell
me who sicced you on my husband?

Your husband?
Oh, come off it, Ophelia.

I want to know
what this is all about.

Samantha, you know that as
a familiar, I only follow orders.

Aha!

Mother?
Mmm?

Are you the one who
let the cat out of the bag?

Well, I...

Endora, I'm not
taking the rap on my own.

If there's anything I can't
abide, it's a stool pigeon.

I'm leaving.

Mother, you'll get yours.

Ophelia, are you going to
tell me what's going on,

or would you rather I
zapped up a hungry bulldog?

All right.

Endora, with your best
interests at heart,

merely wanted to test
your mate's mettle.

Darrin can handle himself as long
as you don't pull any hocus-pocus.

I don't know what
you're talking about.

Oh, knock it off, Ophelia. I
know Darrin. You're not his type.

You want to make
a friendly wager on that?

No, but I'll make
an unfriendly one,

just as long as you let Darrin
act of his own free will.

All spells off,
and do your worst, Ophelia.

Darrin. May I
call you Darrin?

Well, certainly.

I have a confession
to make.

What's that?

I know it sounds silly,
but the truth is

I've never met a man
who made me feel so secure.

I mean, so perfectly content.

Well,
thank you very much.

I mean, uh, well, that's
very flattering but, uh...

Don't you
find me attractive?

Oh, uh, of course.
Of course.

Uh, that's the problem.

That and the fact
that I'm married.

I love married men.

I adore married men.

They're so... So, uh...

Married is what they are.

Oh, well, look at Larry.

I wonder what's
wrong with him.

Oh, huh, that was a
very refreshing nap.

I think I'll...

Have another one.

Ophelia, there's something
strange going on around here.

And no offense, but I'm not
waiting around to find out what it is.

Uh, Larry. Larry.

Larry, I'm going to the
airport to wait for the fog to lift.

If you want to sleep, why don't
you do it in your own room?

I feel great,
so you just run along

and I'll take care of whatever
problems Ophelia has.

Okay, Larry.
See you tomorrow.

So long, Ophelia.
Good luck tomorrow.

Well, I guess I'll have
that little drink.

Can I fix you something?
[Ophelia] Yes, please.

Now what?

Ophelia, I know this is
none of my business,

but Louise Tate
happens to be a good friend.

On second thought, I'd better
be getting back to my room.

Of course, if you can't
stay, I'll understand.

You will?

Mmm.

I wish you'd
explain it to me.

Ophelia, my sweet,

what makes you second best
is you try too hard.

Ta-ta.

Hi, sweetheart.
Hi.

Thought you were
gonna be stuck in Albany.

Yeah, so did I.

The darndest thing happened.

I decided to go to the
airport to wait for the fog to lift

and when I got there,
there wasn't any fog.

I was gonna call you, but,
uh, I barely made my plane.

Oh, well, that happens
sometimes. The fog lifts.

That's not what happened.

There never was any fog,
which means somebody

has been horsing around
with our evening.

I... I know.
I know, sweetheart,

and... And she promised
she'd never do it again.

Promised whom?

You.

And the world.

Come on out back.

She said she'd have something
for you when you got home.

Sam, you mean
everybody can see that?

Anyone who's looking.

I'm certainly glad your mother
can't remember my name.

Yes, there are times when
it's a blessing, aren't there?