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1
00:00:02,126 --> 00:00:03,795
What are you doing?
2
00:00:03,837 --> 00:00:05,589
Well, Larry
called earlier.
3
00:00:05,631 --> 00:00:08,425
He's all uptight about
the Blakely account.
4
00:00:08,467 --> 00:00:10,885
I told him I'd
rough out some ideas
5
00:00:10,928 --> 00:00:11,970
and mail 'em in
tomorrow.
6
00:00:11,970 --> 00:00:13,639
Doesn't he know
you're on vacation?
7
00:00:13,931 --> 00:00:16,517
Oh, he knows.
But he doesn't care.
8
00:00:16,558 --> 00:00:18,936
Oh.
Besides,
9
00:00:18,977 --> 00:00:20,229
if I do
this preliminary work,
10
00:00:20,270 --> 00:00:21,896
it'll keep him
from coming up here.
11
00:00:21,939 --> 00:00:23,607
Hm. Some vacation.
12
00:00:23,649 --> 00:00:24,983
You're stuck here working,
13
00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:26,527
and I'm off to a meeting.
14
00:00:26,568 --> 00:00:27,611
What's on the agenda?
15
00:00:27,653 --> 00:00:29,279
Well, uh, tonight
16
00:00:29,321 --> 00:00:31,949
we install
the new resident witch.
17
00:00:31,990 --> 00:00:33,158
Resident witch?
18
00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:35,118
Yes. We've had one living here
19
00:00:35,159 --> 00:00:36,328
in Salem incognito
20
00:00:36,370 --> 00:00:38,121
ever since
the witch-hunts of 1692,
21
00:00:38,162 --> 00:00:40,665
just to make sure
it never happens again.
22
00:00:40,707 --> 00:00:42,417
You know...
23
00:00:42,459 --> 00:00:44,461
some of you witches
aren't half bad.
24
00:00:47,005 --> 00:00:49,967
Why don't we forget about
work and conventions?
25
00:00:50,008 --> 00:00:52,177
Let's think of this
as a second honeymoon.
26
00:00:54,304 --> 00:00:55,556
Mm.
27
00:00:55,597 --> 00:00:56,974
I can get out
of the meeting.
28
00:00:57,015 --> 00:00:58,225
I'll tell them
I came down with
29
00:00:58,267 --> 00:01:00,227
a very bad case
of love.
30
00:01:00,269 --> 00:01:02,271
[Endora] As chair lady of the meeting,
31
00:01:02,312 --> 00:01:05,941
I would not consider it
a proper excuse.
32
00:01:08,151 --> 00:01:10,153
Why don't you
ever knock, Endora?
33
00:01:10,194 --> 00:01:11,989
And why don't
you ever
34
00:01:12,030 --> 00:01:13,282
knock it off?
35
00:01:13,322 --> 00:01:16,368
Come along, Samantha.
We'll be late.
36
00:01:16,410 --> 00:01:18,662
I'll try not to wake you up
when I get back.
37
00:01:18,703 --> 00:01:20,664
Uh, you'd better
wake me up...
38
00:01:20,706 --> 00:01:22,291
or I'll never
forgive you.
39
00:01:31,425 --> 00:01:34,011
After a short recess...
40
00:01:34,052 --> 00:01:35,637
we'll deal with
the appointment
41
00:01:35,679 --> 00:01:38,015
of the new resident
witch of Salem.
42
00:01:38,056 --> 00:01:41,476
As you well know,
this office was created
43
00:01:41,518 --> 00:01:45,022
out of the wisdom of
the high priestess, Hepzibah...
44
00:01:45,063 --> 00:01:48,483
in the year 1692...
45
00:01:48,525 --> 00:01:50,736
dedicated to protect
46
00:01:50,777 --> 00:01:53,196
the image of the witch.
47
00:01:53,238 --> 00:01:57,200
And if necessary,
through the use of witchcraft,
48
00:01:57,242 --> 00:01:59,036
to protect
those innocent people
49
00:01:59,077 --> 00:02:00,579
who may be accused
as witches.
50
00:02:00,621 --> 00:02:04,458
As well as to protect
against themselves...
51
00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:09,338
those mortals
so foolish as to cry:
52
00:02:09,379 --> 00:02:11,214
"Witch!"
53
00:02:18,263 --> 00:02:21,099
This coven is
now in recess.
54
00:02:24,102 --> 00:02:26,063
I'm going
to get a little bit of food.
55
00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:31,109
Guess who.
56
00:02:31,109 --> 00:02:33,528
Ha-ha. Waldo.
Who else?
57
00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:34,738
How did you guess?
58
00:02:34,780 --> 00:02:36,365
The wart on
your little finger.
59
00:02:36,406 --> 00:02:38,617
From the time
you turned me into a frog
60
00:02:38,659 --> 00:02:39,785
when we were children.
61
00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,328
I'm sorry it
never went away.
62
00:02:41,370 --> 00:02:42,454
I'm not.
63
00:02:42,496 --> 00:02:45,207
This foolish thing
reminds me of you.
64
00:02:46,541 --> 00:02:47,751
Waldo. Grow up.
65
00:02:47,793 --> 00:02:50,212
I'm happily married with
two beautiful children.
66
00:02:50,252 --> 00:02:52,631
Yeah, but to a mortal.
That doesn't count.
67
00:02:52,631 --> 00:02:54,633
Silly.
Oh, excuse me.
68
00:02:54,675 --> 00:02:55,758
I-I'm needed.
69
00:03:11,149 --> 00:03:13,485
Fly into my nest
My love
70
00:03:13,526 --> 00:03:17,531
Though you may be second best
My love
71
00:03:17,572 --> 00:03:21,159
Though you're only make-believe
My love
72
00:03:21,159 --> 00:03:24,162
At least you're mine this eve
My love
73
00:03:27,290 --> 00:03:30,127
Wasn't very nice of her
telling me to grow up.
74
00:03:30,168 --> 00:03:33,338
But, Waldo,
my darling, my love,
75
00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:36,383
that's the thing
I adore about you:
76
00:03:36,425 --> 00:03:38,301
your boyish
quality.
77
00:03:38,343 --> 00:03:39,636
That's better.
78
00:03:39,678 --> 00:03:41,138
I love you,
Waldo.
79
00:03:41,179 --> 00:03:42,556
Do you
love me?
80
00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:45,142
Do I love thee?
81
00:03:46,518 --> 00:03:47,686
Let me count the ways.
82
00:03:47,728 --> 00:03:50,105
Let me count
the ways.
83
00:03:50,147 --> 00:03:51,523
One, like
some kind of nut.
84
00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:53,442
Two, like a case of
arrested development.
85
00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:54,776
Mother,
you're intruding.
86
00:03:54,818 --> 00:03:56,153
On a what?
On a nothing.
87
00:03:56,194 --> 00:03:57,529
On a figment
of your imagination.
88
00:03:57,571 --> 00:04:00,282
It's my figment.
Please don't interfere.
89
00:04:00,323 --> 00:04:01,533
She's air, Waldo.
90
00:04:01,575 --> 00:04:04,494
You make her up in
that sick brain of yours.
91
00:04:04,536 --> 00:04:08,331
All these centuries,
pining over one skinny witch.
92
00:04:08,373 --> 00:04:10,584
I have a right
to lead my own life.
93
00:04:10,625 --> 00:04:11,710
Then lead it.
94
00:04:11,752 --> 00:04:13,462
Do something.
95
00:04:13,503 --> 00:04:14,880
I will.
96
00:04:15,797 --> 00:04:17,382
I promise you.
97
00:05:19,277 --> 00:05:20,695
Sweetheart?
98
00:05:22,279 --> 00:05:23,740
Has room service
come yet?
99
00:05:23,782 --> 00:05:25,283
No, not yet.
100
00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:27,327
Oh, dear. I'm afraid
I'm only gonna have time
101
00:05:27,369 --> 00:05:28,327
for a cup of coffee.
102
00:05:28,370 --> 00:05:30,956
I thought the witching hour
started at midnight.
103
00:05:30,997 --> 00:05:32,833
Yes, well, huh,
Mother put me
104
00:05:32,874 --> 00:05:34,584
on the Ways and Means
Committee.
105
00:05:34,626 --> 00:05:36,253
She's the chairman.
106
00:05:36,294 --> 00:05:38,213
If she's the chairman,
it should be called
107
00:05:38,255 --> 00:05:41,216
the Ways to be Mean
Committee.
108
00:05:41,258 --> 00:05:43,218
Room service!
109
00:05:43,260 --> 00:05:44,386
Come in.
110
00:05:47,973 --> 00:05:49,766
Now, you certainly
took your time.
111
00:05:49,808 --> 00:05:51,976
You don't like it, go back
where you came from.
112
00:05:54,855 --> 00:05:56,815
I tipped the waiter
to let me do it.
113
00:05:56,857 --> 00:05:58,608
Ha-ha. Funny, huh?
114
00:06:04,865 --> 00:06:06,533
I'll let you know in a minute.
115
00:06:06,575 --> 00:06:07,701
What are you doing here?
116
00:06:07,742 --> 00:06:09,286
Well, knowing that
you'd be anxious
117
00:06:09,327 --> 00:06:11,621
to show me your progress
on the Blakely account,
118
00:06:11,663 --> 00:06:13,248
I gladly sacrificed
my time
119
00:06:13,290 --> 00:06:14,624
to come up here
to see you.
120
00:06:14,666 --> 00:06:16,251
But I thought we agreed
yesterday
121
00:06:16,293 --> 00:06:17,586
that you weren't coming up.
122
00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:18,795
That was yesterday.
123
00:06:18,837 --> 00:06:20,672
We can't keep
living in the past.
124
00:06:20,714 --> 00:06:23,300
I-I don't quite follow that.
125
00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:25,010
What he means is
we can't keep living
126
00:06:25,010 --> 00:06:26,678
in the past because
he's too busy
127
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:29,472
bothering us in the present.
128
00:06:29,514 --> 00:06:31,349
Now, here are the roughs
of my presentation.
129
00:06:31,349 --> 00:06:32,976
Take them back
with my blessings.
130
00:06:33,017 --> 00:06:35,645
Now, don't think I don't
appreciate this,
131
00:06:35,687 --> 00:06:37,314
but who can do
a better selling-job
132
00:06:37,355 --> 00:06:39,649
than the man
who created these gems?
133
00:06:39,690 --> 00:06:40,901
Sorry.
134
00:06:40,942 --> 00:06:42,694
What's wrong with
picking up a fat bonus
135
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:44,529
while you're on vacation?
136
00:06:44,529 --> 00:06:45,779
Blakely digs you.
137
00:06:45,822 --> 00:06:47,824
He likes your kind of pizzazz.
138
00:06:47,866 --> 00:06:49,701
I'm all pizzazzed out.
139
00:06:49,743 --> 00:06:51,494
That's why I'm on vacation.
140
00:06:51,536 --> 00:06:53,538
Sweetheart, if you'd
really like
141
00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:56,041
to go back for just a day
or two, I wouldn't mind.
142
00:06:56,082 --> 00:06:58,793
It's that kind of
loyalty that makes me
143
00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:00,295
proud to be an American.
144
00:07:00,337 --> 00:07:01,379
Ah, you--
145
00:07:01,463 --> 00:07:03,964
You fellas figure it out.
I have some family business.
146
00:07:04,007 --> 00:07:06,843
Now, I'll meet you back here
at 1:00 for lunch, okay?
147
00:07:06,885 --> 00:07:08,887
Bye-bye, Larry.
Bye, Sam.
148
00:07:09,888 --> 00:07:11,473
How about it,
friend?
149
00:07:12,724 --> 00:07:14,017
Oh, aren't you gonna
eat anything
150
00:07:14,059 --> 00:07:15,602
after all the trouble
I went to?
151
00:07:15,644 --> 00:07:16,853
Nope.
152
00:07:16,895 --> 00:07:18,688
I'm off to see
the sights of Salem.
153
00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:20,023
Now, that's what I mean.
154
00:07:20,065 --> 00:07:22,525
Even the way you said that,
it's got a ring to it.
155
00:07:22,567 --> 00:07:25,362
Just a couple of days, Darrin.
For crying out--
156
00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:27,322
[Darrin] You know,
I've been learning a lot
157
00:07:27,364 --> 00:07:28,740
about early American
history.
158
00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:30,075
Now, isn't it
fascinating
159
00:07:30,116 --> 00:07:31,910
that one of Nathaniel
Hawthorne's ancestors
160
00:07:31,910 --> 00:07:34,955
actually presided at
the Salem witchcraft trials?
161
00:07:34,996 --> 00:07:36,748
Speaking of witchcraft,
162
00:07:36,790 --> 00:07:39,584
that's what it's going to take
to save the Blakely account.
163
00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:42,420
[Darrin] Get over there.
164
00:07:42,504 --> 00:07:43,964
I'll take your picture
with Roger Conant.
165
00:07:44,005 --> 00:07:45,799
He led one of
the first groups
166
00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:47,884
to settle in Salem
in 1626.
167
00:07:47,926 --> 00:07:50,345
That old boy
goes way back.
168
00:07:50,387 --> 00:07:52,055
What about
our friendship?
169
00:07:52,097 --> 00:07:53,848
That goes
way back too.
170
00:07:53,890 --> 00:07:55,600
Why don't you
think about that?
171
00:08:01,690 --> 00:08:02,941
Go on. Take it.
172
00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:04,442
You can call it,
173
00:08:04,442 --> 00:08:07,779
"Man Begging in Front of
House of Seven Gables."
174
00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:09,030
A half day.
175
00:08:09,072 --> 00:08:11,533
Come back for
one half day.
176
00:08:11,574 --> 00:08:12,701
No.
177
00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:15,078
This is my first
vacation in four years,
178
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:16,871
and you're not gonna
bully me out of it
179
00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:18,665
or wheedle me
out of it.
180
00:08:18,707 --> 00:08:19,916
But now I mean it, Larry.
181
00:08:19,958 --> 00:08:21,960
I am staying
right here in Salem.
182
00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:23,920
Period. End of discussion.
183
00:08:23,962 --> 00:08:26,006
Darrin, let's not
beat around the bush.
184
00:08:26,047 --> 00:08:28,383
I want a definite
answer.
185
00:08:28,425 --> 00:08:31,386
If you'll excuse me,
I'm gonna buy some more film.
186
00:08:31,428 --> 00:08:32,761
Fine.
187
00:08:32,804 --> 00:08:34,973
I'll be waiting
patiently.
188
00:08:51,489 --> 00:08:53,158
[Fantasy Samantha] I love you, Waldo.
189
00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:55,827
I love you more than
life itself.
190
00:08:56,995 --> 00:08:58,788
Tell me more.
191
00:08:58,830 --> 00:09:01,624
Don't think that I haven't
paid the price in loneliness.
192
00:09:01,666 --> 00:09:04,002
[Waldo] Perhaps we
shouldn't be meeting like this.
193
00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:05,879
We shouldn't?
194
00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:08,673
But our lives are
full of "shouldn'ts."
195
00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:10,925
Can a star
stop twinkling?
196
00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:13,178
Can a bird
stop singing?
197
00:09:15,472 --> 00:09:16,848
Oh!
198
00:09:17,766 --> 00:09:19,017
I'm sorry.
199
00:09:19,934 --> 00:09:21,477
Where are you going?
200
00:09:21,519 --> 00:09:23,521
There's supposed to be
a grape arbor through there.
201
00:09:23,521 --> 00:09:24,898
Well, they're
out of season.
202
00:09:24,939 --> 00:09:27,442
Uh, ju-- Just a lot
of naked vines.
203
00:09:27,484 --> 00:09:28,860
Let's get out of here.
Uh--
204
00:09:28,860 --> 00:09:30,820
Boy, you're really
upset, aren't you?
205
00:09:30,862 --> 00:09:32,072
Upset? Me?
206
00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:33,990
Ha-ha.
About what?
207
00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:37,202
About my refusing to help out
with the Blakely account.
208
00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:40,580
I'm sorry I made such
a federal case out of it.
209
00:09:41,539 --> 00:09:43,917
I'll go back if
it's that important.
210
00:09:43,958 --> 00:09:45,835
You will not.
211
00:09:45,877 --> 00:09:47,587
You stick to
your guns, boy.
212
00:09:47,629 --> 00:09:49,672
You haven't had
a vacation in four years,
213
00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:52,092
and you're not gonna
let me bully you out of it
214
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:53,885
or wheedle you
out of it.
215
00:09:53,927 --> 00:09:56,054
You're staying
right here in Salem...
216
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:57,597
with Samantha.
217
00:09:57,639 --> 00:09:58,723
And furthermore...
218
00:09:58,765 --> 00:10:04,062
Perhaps if I met her husband
and learned to hate him...
219
00:10:04,104 --> 00:10:07,148
I could force myself
to get rid of him.
220
00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:10,860
[Larry] Believe me, Darrin,
221
00:10:10,902 --> 00:10:12,195
I can handle
the Blakely account.
222
00:10:12,237 --> 00:10:14,864
You don't have to
come back to New York.
223
00:10:14,905 --> 00:10:16,116
I wonder what's
keeping Sam.
224
00:10:16,157 --> 00:10:17,742
Well, how should I know?
225
00:10:17,784 --> 00:10:18,952
I mean, uh...
226
00:10:18,993 --> 00:10:20,495
why'd you ask me that?
227
00:10:20,537 --> 00:10:22,038
It was just
a rhetorical question.
228
00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:23,748
I-I didn't expect an answer.
229
00:10:23,790 --> 00:10:25,500
Ah, here she is.
230
00:10:25,542 --> 00:10:26,835
Hi, sweetheart.
Sorry I'm late.
231
00:10:26,876 --> 00:10:28,002
Mwah.
232
00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:30,046
Forgive me, Larry.
I'll try.
233
00:10:30,088 --> 00:10:31,881
Another martini,
please.
234
00:10:31,923 --> 00:10:35,051
Oh. Shopping in
this town is impossible.
235
00:10:35,093 --> 00:10:37,053
I thought you were
visiting relatives.
236
00:10:37,095 --> 00:10:39,848
That's why I was
visiting relatives.
237
00:10:39,889 --> 00:10:41,599
Talk, talk, talk.
238
00:10:41,683 --> 00:10:43,518
Oh, I am
ravenous.
239
00:10:43,559 --> 00:10:45,895
Did you do a lot of sightseeing?
240
00:10:45,937 --> 00:10:46,980
Enough.
241
00:10:47,021 --> 00:10:48,773
More than enough.
242
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:49,982
What did you see?
243
00:10:50,024 --> 00:10:51,526
What did I see?
244
00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:55,905
Well, what do you see
when you sightsee?
245
00:10:55,947 --> 00:10:57,282
Sights.
246
00:10:57,323 --> 00:10:58,741
Oh. Yeah, well--
247
00:10:58,783 --> 00:11:00,160
[Waldo] Hello, Samantha.
248
00:11:00,201 --> 00:11:02,245
Oh. Waldo.
249
00:11:02,287 --> 00:11:04,539
Uh, Waldo, I'd like you
to meet my husband.
250
00:11:04,581 --> 00:11:06,040
This is Darrin.
How do you do?
251
00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:08,251
This is Larry Tate.
How do you do?
252
00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:12,213
I've heard so much
about you, Darrin.
253
00:11:12,255 --> 00:11:15,550
May I say that you are
a very, very lucky man.
254
00:11:15,592 --> 00:11:17,886
Oh, Waldo and I
are old friends.
255
00:11:17,927 --> 00:11:20,722
We practically
grew up together.
256
00:11:20,763 --> 00:11:22,265
Like brother and sister.
257
00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:28,188
I'm sorry.
258
00:11:28,229 --> 00:11:30,315
It just went down
the wrong way.
259
00:11:31,941 --> 00:11:34,110
Waldo, if you don't mind,
260
00:11:34,152 --> 00:11:36,321
we were just about
to order lunch.
261
00:11:36,362 --> 00:11:38,323
Splendid.
I'm famished.
262
00:11:39,657 --> 00:11:40,742
Well...
263
00:11:41,993 --> 00:11:43,745
isn't this cozy?
264
00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:48,917
If you'll excuse me.
265
00:11:48,958 --> 00:11:50,585
I don't feel
very well.
266
00:11:50,627 --> 00:11:53,087
I'm going up to
my room and lie down.
267
00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:55,631
Oh, I-I'm sorry, Larry.
268
00:11:55,673 --> 00:11:56,925
Anything I can do?
269
00:11:56,966 --> 00:11:59,052
I certainly hope so.
270
00:12:06,643 --> 00:12:07,977
What's the matter with him?
271
00:12:08,019 --> 00:12:11,314
I don't know. He's just
a bundle of nerves.
272
00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:15,360
S-sweetheart...
273
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,820
maybe you should go up
and see if he's all right.
274
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:19,948
Yeah,
I guess so.
275
00:12:19,989 --> 00:12:21,699
Excuse me.
276
00:12:25,870 --> 00:12:27,163
Waldo.
277
00:12:27,205 --> 00:12:29,290
What's the big idea,
barging in?
278
00:12:29,332 --> 00:12:30,833
I just wanted to
279
00:12:30,875 --> 00:12:32,835
meet your husband,
see what you saw in him.
280
00:12:32,877 --> 00:12:34,712
Now that you've met him?
281
00:12:34,796 --> 00:12:36,256
What do you see in him?
282
00:12:37,215 --> 00:12:40,260
Tsk. Honestly.
283
00:12:44,222 --> 00:12:45,682
Who is it?
284
00:12:45,723 --> 00:12:48,226
It's Darrin.
285
00:12:48,268 --> 00:12:49,559
Darrin, what are you
doing up here?
286
00:12:49,602 --> 00:12:53,022
You should be downstairs
with them eating your lunch.
287
00:12:53,064 --> 00:12:54,065
What for?
288
00:12:54,107 --> 00:12:55,650
Well, I-- I--
289
00:12:55,692 --> 00:12:58,194
I, uh-- Well, if you
don't, a stranger's
290
00:12:58,236 --> 00:13:00,363
going to have to
pick up our check.
291
00:13:00,405 --> 00:13:02,240
Larry.
292
00:13:02,282 --> 00:13:04,659
What's
bothering you?
293
00:13:04,701 --> 00:13:06,202
Bothering me?
Nothing's bothering me.
294
00:13:06,244 --> 00:13:08,371
It's what's bothering you
that's bothering me.
295
00:13:08,413 --> 00:13:10,123
You're not
making sense.
296
00:13:10,164 --> 00:13:14,711
Okay. Then here it is
in a nutshell.
297
00:13:16,421 --> 00:13:18,298
Yes?
298
00:13:18,339 --> 00:13:20,091
I don't want to get involved.
299
00:13:22,719 --> 00:13:24,304
In what?
300
00:13:24,345 --> 00:13:26,931
Well, let's put it
another way.
301
00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:28,975
If Sam, for example,
302
00:13:29,017 --> 00:13:30,351
happened to run into
an old friend
303
00:13:30,393 --> 00:13:32,687
like Waldo,
for example,
304
00:13:32,729 --> 00:13:35,815
at the House of Seven Gables,
for example,
305
00:13:35,857 --> 00:13:39,360
that doesn't necessarily mean
what you think it means.
306
00:13:39,402 --> 00:13:41,237
When did you
see them there?
307
00:13:41,279 --> 00:13:42,947
When we were
sightseeing.
308
00:13:42,989 --> 00:13:44,782
On the other hand,
309
00:13:44,866 --> 00:13:47,243
it could have been somebody
that looked like her.
310
00:13:47,285 --> 00:13:48,828
Why didn't I think
of that before?
311
00:13:48,870 --> 00:13:50,246
It was somebody
that looked like her.
312
00:13:50,288 --> 00:13:51,748
The light was bad,
313
00:13:51,789 --> 00:13:54,792
and I didn't see
what I thought I saw.
314
00:13:54,792 --> 00:13:57,962
So forget the whole thing.
Go down, enjoy your lunch.
315
00:13:59,047 --> 00:14:00,965
Where you going?
316
00:14:01,006 --> 00:14:04,052
I'm sure there's
a simple explanation
317
00:14:04,093 --> 00:14:05,720
to whatever you saw...
318
00:14:05,761 --> 00:14:07,096
so I'm gonna
take your advice
319
00:14:07,138 --> 00:14:08,473
and finish my lunch.
320
00:14:18,482 --> 00:14:19,859
Are you ready
for lunch?
321
00:14:19,901 --> 00:14:22,278
Waldo, I can't
have lunch with you.
322
00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:24,822
I really should
go upstairs.
323
00:14:24,906 --> 00:14:27,116
And remember,
none of your tricks.
324
00:14:27,158 --> 00:14:29,827
My mother won't like it,
but I promise you, Samantha,
325
00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:31,412
none of my tricks.
326
00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:33,247
Thank you. Excuse me.
327
00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:37,168
Good afternoon.
Good afternoon.
328
00:14:47,345 --> 00:14:49,263
Waiter, two more
of the same, please.
329
00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:05,446
So...
330
00:15:05,488 --> 00:15:08,116
her husband is
decent and loving.
331
00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:08,950
What about me?
332
00:15:08,991 --> 00:15:12,995
You are intelligent
and sensitive
333
00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:13,996
and vibrant.
334
00:15:14,038 --> 00:15:16,457
That's much better
than being
335
00:15:16,499 --> 00:15:19,919
decent and loving.
336
00:15:19,961 --> 00:15:22,797
Then shall we away
to our rendezvous?
337
00:15:22,839 --> 00:15:24,549
You're not
"awaying" anyplace.
338
00:15:24,590 --> 00:15:26,050
I want a full
explanation of
339
00:15:26,092 --> 00:15:28,136
what's going on here,
or I'm gonna bust--
340
00:15:28,177 --> 00:15:29,804
Oh, stop crowing.
341
00:15:29,846 --> 00:15:30,972
I'm sorry, Samantha,
342
00:15:31,013 --> 00:15:32,974
but I do
detest violence.
343
00:15:33,015 --> 00:15:34,350
You had to
protect yourself.
344
00:15:39,230 --> 00:15:42,525
That does it. I quit.
345
00:15:42,567 --> 00:15:46,070
But, Larry, if Darrin left
your room five minutes ago,
346
00:15:46,112 --> 00:15:47,321
where did he go?
347
00:15:47,363 --> 00:15:48,531
He's not in our room.
348
00:15:48,573 --> 00:15:50,908
Well, maybe it's just as well.
349
00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:53,035
Ah, he wasn't
very hungry anyway.
350
00:15:53,077 --> 00:15:55,079
What?
Uh, nothing.
351
00:15:55,079 --> 00:15:57,206
Larry, how are you
feeling?
352
00:15:57,248 --> 00:15:59,542
Oh, my-- My throat's still
bothering me a little.
353
00:15:59,584 --> 00:16:00,960
But, uh...
354
00:16:01,002 --> 00:16:02,420
don't worry
about me, Sam.
355
00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:04,213
I'll be all right.
356
00:16:04,255 --> 00:16:06,340
Well, is there anything
I can do to help?
357
00:16:07,550 --> 00:16:10,803
Just, uh, be good
to each other.
358
00:16:12,138 --> 00:16:14,223
Well, uh, we'll
certainly try.
359
00:16:14,265 --> 00:16:15,558
Uh, bye.
360
00:16:48,132 --> 00:16:49,550
Darrin.
361
00:16:49,592 --> 00:16:51,552
Darrin, is that you?
362
00:16:57,016 --> 00:17:00,228
Oh, you poor dear.
363
00:17:00,269 --> 00:17:04,106
I-I-- I don't blame you
for being upset.
364
00:17:04,148 --> 00:17:07,276
A-and somebody is gonna
pay for this, believe me.
365
00:17:07,318 --> 00:17:08,569
Mother!
366
00:17:14,325 --> 00:17:15,451
Darrin.
367
00:17:15,493 --> 00:17:16,619
Darrin.
368
00:17:18,204 --> 00:17:20,039
Well, uh, don't
be mad at me.
369
00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:21,457
I had nothing
to do with it.
370
00:17:35,638 --> 00:17:37,431
I-I-I'm sorry, sweetheart.
371
00:17:37,473 --> 00:17:39,642
But I-- I only did that
for your own good.
372
00:17:39,684 --> 00:17:41,435
Believe me.
373
00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:44,188
Now, you be patient.
374
00:17:44,230 --> 00:17:47,233
And tonight at the convention,
I'll get to the bottom of this.
375
00:17:53,281 --> 00:17:55,992
And now for
my next encore...
376
00:17:56,032 --> 00:17:57,326
I should like to recite
377
00:17:57,368 --> 00:17:59,453
one of the loveliest
incantations
378
00:17:59,494 --> 00:18:00,705
of our literature:
379
00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:04,500
The spell to bring on
an April shower.
380
00:18:04,542 --> 00:18:06,711
Try this for
an encore, Mother.
381
00:18:06,752 --> 00:18:08,629
Please, Samantha.
382
00:18:08,671 --> 00:18:10,339
I work alone.
Oh, come on.
383
00:18:10,381 --> 00:18:11,965
Show them
how clever you are.
384
00:18:12,008 --> 00:18:14,135
Oh, stop waving that
ridiculous bird at me--
385
00:18:14,176 --> 00:18:17,430
Don't you call my husband
a ridiculous bird.
386
00:18:17,471 --> 00:18:20,433
That's Durwood? Oh-ho.
387
00:18:20,474 --> 00:18:22,560
How perfectly divine.
388
00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:25,146
Well, I am
not amused.
389
00:18:25,186 --> 00:18:26,981
Now, put him back
the way you found him.
390
00:18:27,023 --> 00:18:28,357
I didn't do it,
sweetheart.
391
00:18:28,398 --> 00:18:32,528
Not that I wouldn't have,
had I thought of it.
392
00:18:32,570 --> 00:18:34,238
Well, then...
393
00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:35,071
who did?
394
00:18:35,071 --> 00:18:37,700
I don't know.
But whoever it was,
395
00:18:37,742 --> 00:18:40,161
let's have an ovation for him.
396
00:18:40,202 --> 00:18:41,996
Yes!
397
00:18:42,038 --> 00:18:44,457
You should be ashamed
of yourselves.
398
00:18:44,498 --> 00:18:45,750
All of you!
399
00:18:45,750 --> 00:18:49,337
You call yourselves
decent witches?
400
00:18:49,378 --> 00:18:52,214
Bullies, that's
what you are!
401
00:18:52,256 --> 00:18:54,383
Where's your sense
of humor, Samantha?
402
00:18:54,425 --> 00:18:58,012
It's just a little
convention high jinks.
403
00:18:58,054 --> 00:19:02,058
We're no worse than
the Shriners or the Elks.
404
00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:04,018
[Samantha] Well, I
don't think it's funny.
405
00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:07,730
And I want whoever
did it to undo it.
406
00:19:07,772 --> 00:19:09,273
Pronto!
407
00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:15,780
Well, what--?
408
00:19:15,780 --> 00:19:17,782
Well, what happened?
Where did they go?
409
00:19:17,823 --> 00:19:20,201
Uh, I-I'm sorry,
sweetheart,
410
00:19:20,242 --> 00:19:22,787
but, uh, they consider this
hallowed ground.
411
00:19:22,828 --> 00:19:24,705
And... well,
you're a--
412
00:19:24,747 --> 00:19:27,124
I know what I am.
413
00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:29,669
Now get me back to
the hotel on the double.
414
00:19:29,710 --> 00:19:31,420
Uh, yes, Darrin.
415
00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:41,055
What are you doing?
416
00:19:41,097 --> 00:19:42,640
What I was doing
when I was a bird.
417
00:19:42,682 --> 00:19:44,141
Except faster.
418
00:19:44,225 --> 00:19:46,519
Don't you think
I deserve an explanation?
419
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:49,063
This afternoon,
Larry saw you
420
00:19:49,105 --> 00:19:51,148
and Waldo the warlock
421
00:19:51,190 --> 00:19:52,608
at the House of
Seven Gables.
422
00:19:52,650 --> 00:19:54,109
Waldo and me?
423
00:19:54,151 --> 00:19:55,444
That's impossible.
424
00:19:55,486 --> 00:19:57,321
I don't wanna talk
about it anymore.
425
00:19:57,363 --> 00:20:00,116
And I'll go home, cool off
and forgive you.
426
00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:03,119
In a year or two.
427
00:20:04,328 --> 00:20:05,454
Maybe.
428
00:20:08,332 --> 00:20:12,461
And you're not even going
to demand an explanation?
429
00:20:12,503 --> 00:20:15,464
Okay. I demand
an explanation.
430
00:20:15,506 --> 00:20:17,383
That's better.
431
00:20:17,425 --> 00:20:19,802
Well, go on. Explain.
432
00:20:19,844 --> 00:20:21,220
I can't.
433
00:20:21,262 --> 00:20:23,638
B-but I know
someone who can.
434
00:20:23,681 --> 00:20:25,641
Waldo?
435
00:20:25,683 --> 00:20:27,268
Waldo.
436
00:20:27,309 --> 00:20:29,395
Front
and center.
437
00:20:30,771 --> 00:20:32,523
I was expecting
your call.
438
00:20:33,566 --> 00:20:35,776
First, may I
apologize
439
00:20:35,818 --> 00:20:37,111
for the bird
business?
440
00:20:37,153 --> 00:20:40,531
Thanks. From the bottom
of my beak.
441
00:20:41,699 --> 00:20:43,784
Waldo, rumor hath it
442
00:20:43,826 --> 00:20:45,369
that you and I
were seen cavorting
443
00:20:45,411 --> 00:20:47,163
at the House of
Seven Gables today.
444
00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:49,540
Now, I'm gonna
ask you nicely
445
00:20:49,540 --> 00:20:51,292
to explain that rumor...
446
00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:55,588
quickly, or I will zap you
into another century.
447
00:20:55,629 --> 00:20:56,756
All right.
448
00:20:56,797 --> 00:20:58,674
I was going to
explain anyway.
449
00:20:58,715 --> 00:21:00,843
Sir.
450
00:21:00,885 --> 00:21:03,137
You have
your Samantha...
451
00:21:03,179 --> 00:21:04,597
and I have mine.
452
00:21:07,475 --> 00:21:09,435
[Waldo] Real to
nobody but myself.
453
00:21:15,191 --> 00:21:17,401
Heh. It's a foolish
fantasy, I know.
454
00:21:17,443 --> 00:21:19,779
But I assure you,
a harmless one.
455
00:21:19,820 --> 00:21:21,446
Oh, Waldo.
456
00:21:21,489 --> 00:21:24,241
It's been almost an hour
since I've seen you.
457
00:21:24,241 --> 00:21:26,577
I've been so lonesome
and sad.
458
00:21:26,619 --> 00:21:28,412
Oh, I love
you so, Waldo.
459
00:21:28,454 --> 00:21:32,249
I love you with
all my heart and soul.
460
00:21:32,249 --> 00:21:34,251
I love you--
All right.
461
00:21:34,335 --> 00:21:35,586
All right.
That's enough.
462
00:21:36,796 --> 00:21:38,255
Who's that?
463
00:21:39,381 --> 00:21:40,382
Sam.
464
00:21:40,424 --> 00:21:43,344
I'm-- I'm sorry.
465
00:21:43,385 --> 00:21:45,179
I'm not.
466
00:21:45,221 --> 00:21:47,807
You're beautiful
when you're jealous.
467
00:21:47,848 --> 00:21:50,184
I knocked, but
nobody answered.
468
00:21:50,226 --> 00:21:52,186
Oh, Waldo.
469
00:21:52,228 --> 00:21:54,438
I love you more than
life itself.
470
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:57,398
I'm sorry, Sam. But this is
something I have to do.
471
00:22:04,907 --> 00:22:06,492
Waldo.
472
00:22:06,534 --> 00:22:09,453
Can't you do anything
but crows?
473
00:22:20,881 --> 00:22:22,800
Shall I put him
back the way he was?
474
00:22:22,842 --> 00:22:24,260
Not yet.
475
00:22:24,301 --> 00:22:25,427
How
will we
476
00:22:25,469 --> 00:22:26,595
explain this
to Larry?
477
00:22:26,637 --> 00:22:28,722
Well, sweetheart,
we have a choice.
478
00:22:28,763 --> 00:22:30,558
We could tell him
I was having
479
00:22:30,599 --> 00:22:32,434
a mad, impetuous
fling.
480
00:22:32,476 --> 00:22:33,811
Sure.
481
00:22:33,853 --> 00:22:36,605
Or we could
tell him...
482
00:22:36,647 --> 00:22:38,315
I'm a witch.
483
00:22:38,357 --> 00:22:40,359
Yeah, that would
be terrific.
484
00:22:40,401 --> 00:22:41,609
Or...
485
00:22:41,652 --> 00:22:44,946
we could tell him
that was Serena he saw.
486
00:22:44,989 --> 00:22:46,532
That will do it.
487
00:22:46,574 --> 00:22:48,492
Okay, Waldo.
Let's have a Serena.
488
00:22:48,534 --> 00:22:50,578
Must I, Samantha?
489
00:22:50,619 --> 00:22:52,746
I'm not very fond
of your cousin.
490
00:22:52,788 --> 00:22:54,707
Oh, please,
Waldo.
491
00:22:54,748 --> 00:22:57,459
A-- A blond Serena
dressed just like this.
492
00:22:57,501 --> 00:22:59,503
Like your
fantasy Samantha.
493
00:22:59,545 --> 00:23:00,713
Well, that's easier.
494
00:23:05,718 --> 00:23:07,469
Yeah. That's
good enough.
495
00:23:07,511 --> 00:23:08,804
Now do him.
496
00:23:12,308 --> 00:23:13,601
What happened?
497
00:23:13,642 --> 00:23:15,728
Uh, well,
uh, y-you led
498
00:23:15,769 --> 00:23:17,688
with a right
cross. And, uh--
499
00:23:17,730 --> 00:23:20,691
And-- And Waldo countered
with a karate chop.
500
00:23:20,733 --> 00:23:24,320
He's a very dangerous
uh, person, you know.
501
00:23:24,361 --> 00:23:25,613
I didn't feel a thing.
502
00:23:25,654 --> 00:23:27,698
That's what makes him
so dangerous.
503
00:23:27,740 --> 00:23:31,619
I didn't realize before.
You know something?
504
00:23:31,660 --> 00:23:33,996
When you're knocked out,
you dream.
505
00:23:34,038 --> 00:23:35,873
I thought I was a crow.
506
00:23:37,499 --> 00:23:39,627
Where is he?
I may be down...
507
00:23:39,667 --> 00:23:41,378
but I'm not out.
508
00:23:41,420 --> 00:23:43,380
I'm sorry for
the little
509
00:23:43,380 --> 00:23:44,757
misunderstanding,
sir.
510
00:23:44,798 --> 00:23:47,343
Oh. May I present
my friend, Serena?
511
00:23:47,384 --> 00:23:48,844
Hi, cotton top.
512
00:23:48,886 --> 00:23:51,888
Serena, your--
Your hair.
513
00:23:51,931 --> 00:23:54,808
Someone said blondes
have more fun.
514
00:23:54,850 --> 00:23:57,353
I thought I'd
find out. Hm-hm.
515
00:23:59,939 --> 00:24:03,525
Oh, Serena.
It was you all the time.
516
00:24:03,567 --> 00:24:04,859
And I thought that--
517
00:24:04,902 --> 00:24:06,862
A perfectly
understandable mistake.
518
00:24:06,904 --> 00:24:09,323
Hm. And you proved
your loyalty.
519
00:24:09,365 --> 00:24:11,617
Uh, where have you two
girls been? To a costume ball?
520
00:24:11,659 --> 00:24:13,911
That's right.
Serena.
521
00:24:13,911 --> 00:24:16,955
I can't tell you
how glad I am to see you.
35427
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