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1
00:00:03,983 --> 00:00:06,651
Annie. Wake up!
2
00:00:06,652 --> 00:00:09,059
You're fuckin' smart.
3
00:00:09,060 --> 00:00:10,640
You're, like, a writer.
4
00:00:10,647 --> 00:00:12,850
I've got a boner right now,
5
00:00:12,859 --> 00:00:15,780
and it's partially because of
your boobs, but it's also this.
6
00:00:15,782 --> 00:00:18,780
Wait. You read my article?
7
00:00:18,788 --> 00:00:20,700
And you woke me up to tell me,
8
00:00:20,708 --> 00:00:23,040
and you have a boner? That's nice.
9
00:00:23,046 --> 00:00:26,300
Well, yeah. I mean...
10
00:00:26,302 --> 00:00:29,099
we're boyfriend-girlfriend now, so...
11
00:00:29,100 --> 00:00:31,079
we gotta, like, support
each other's work stuff.
12
00:00:31,080 --> 00:00:33,270
- Mm-hmm.
- You listen to my podcast, right?
13
00:00:33,275 --> 00:00:35,900
Yes. Yes, I do.
14
00:00:35,905 --> 00:00:38,392
I... I always do.
15
00:00:39,287 --> 00:00:41,790
And this guy that wrote
the second article
16
00:00:41,792 --> 00:00:43,730
is fuckin' pissed.
17
00:00:43,731 --> 00:00:47,901
Do you guys use "Hello" to
start all your pieces, or... ?
18
00:00:47,902 --> 00:00:50,760
Wait. Fuckin' Gabe?
19
00:00:50,768 --> 00:00:53,310
"Why should my wallet get skinnier
20
00:00:53,315 --> 00:00:56,400
just so your ass can stay fat?"
21
00:00:56,404 --> 00:00:59,320
He's talkin' about my ass.
22
00:00:59,327 --> 00:01:02,130
Fuck. God damn it.
23
00:01:04,253 --> 00:01:07,840
Nobody talks about your
ass but me, motherfucker.
24
00:01:07,844 --> 00:01:10,470
- This guy flirting with you?
- No.
25
00:01:10,474 --> 00:01:12,859
Are you sure? I mean, is he,
like, giving you trouble?
26
00:01:12,860 --> 00:01:14,979
'Cause I can take care of this guy.
27
00:01:14,980 --> 00:01:16,819
I can absolutely tell that I can.
28
00:01:16,820 --> 00:01:19,199
Not from his writing,
but from his picture.
29
00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:21,990
He's my boss. He's a fuckin' nightmare.
30
00:01:21,997 --> 00:01:24,919
God, Amadi must've read it
because he's texted me, like,
31
00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:27,549
a million times. Jesus.
32
00:01:27,550 --> 00:01:29,390
Fuckin' Gabe.
33
00:01:30,097 --> 00:01:31,390
He's fuckin' stupid.
34
00:01:31,391 --> 00:01:32,970
No, he's actually smart,
35
00:01:32,977 --> 00:01:35,610
which is what makes this
so fuckin' annoying.
36
00:01:36,109 --> 00:01:37,570
Hey.
37
00:01:38,614 --> 00:01:40,070
It's OK.
38
00:01:40,075 --> 00:01:42,170
- It's gonna be fine.
- Yeah.
39
00:01:44,333 --> 00:01:45,970
I have to go to work.
40
00:01:46,630 --> 00:01:47,960
All right.
41
00:01:47,966 --> 00:01:51,300
But... you're gonna get
in this bed again,
42
00:01:51,305 --> 00:01:54,180
like, later tonight...
43
00:01:54,186 --> 00:01:56,810
and, uh, you're gonna have
to be ready for that.
44
00:01:56,817 --> 00:01:58,400
Thank you.
45
00:01:58,403 --> 00:01:59,990
- Bye.
- Bye.
46
00:02:04,498 --> 00:02:06,089
Fuck you.
47
00:02:06,090 --> 00:02:10,260
- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
48
00:02:11,137 --> 00:02:13,090
Shit, have you seen my keys?
49
00:02:13,099 --> 00:02:15,390
Nope. Maybe Ryan has.
50
00:02:15,395 --> 00:02:18,099
I heard his guttural moans coming
from your room last night.
51
00:02:18,100 --> 00:02:19,779
- OK.
- I appreciate that
52
00:02:19,780 --> 00:02:20,789
he looked after Bonkers,
53
00:02:20,790 --> 00:02:23,530
but as I was falling asleep, I
realized I still don't like him.
54
00:02:23,537 --> 00:02:24,700
Come on, Fran.
55
00:02:24,706 --> 00:02:27,290
I've wanted this for so long,
can't you just let me have it?
56
00:02:27,294 --> 00:02:28,960
Like, he's really trying.
57
00:02:28,964 --> 00:02:30,630
One afternoon of cuddling our dog
58
00:02:30,635 --> 00:02:33,130
doesn't erase a lifetime
of horrible behavior.
59
00:02:33,139 --> 00:02:36,220
If Saddam Hussein looked after
Bonkers, I wouldn't be, like,
60
00:02:36,229 --> 00:02:38,690
"Saddam Hussein, you should
really date my best friend."
61
00:02:38,692 --> 00:02:40,860
OK, what is the actual issue here?
62
00:02:40,863 --> 00:02:43,280
That's he's treated you
like shit forever.
63
00:02:43,284 --> 00:02:45,219
You cheat on every woman you date,
64
00:02:45,220 --> 00:02:47,202
not to mention you break up with girls
65
00:02:47,203 --> 00:02:48,789
for the dumbest fuckin' reasons.
66
00:02:48,790 --> 00:02:50,920
Like that last girl you broke up with
67
00:02:50,930 --> 00:02:52,692
just because she listened to audiobooks.
68
00:02:52,693 --> 00:02:55,779
You can't listen to a book
and then call it "reading."
69
00:02:56,310 --> 00:02:58,480
OK, well, you're basically
the female Ryan.
70
00:03:00,110 --> 00:03:02,070
Did you really just
fucking say that to me?
71
00:03:02,072 --> 00:03:05,410
Yeah. Yeah, I mean, you say
shit about him all the time,
72
00:03:05,412 --> 00:03:07,950
but we're, like, actually together now,
73
00:03:07,959 --> 00:03:10,420
so I... I'm gonna say some shit back.
74
00:03:10,422 --> 00:03:13,379
Look, I like that you're
having this metamorphosis,
75
00:03:13,380 --> 00:03:14,479
or whatever's happening here,
76
00:03:14,480 --> 00:03:16,890
but I think this sentiment
is incredibly misdirected.
77
00:03:16,894 --> 00:03:19,419
Fran, I can't fucking do this right now.
78
00:03:19,420 --> 00:03:21,230
Like, I have to find my fucking keys.
79
00:03:21,235 --> 00:03:24,240
- And I have to get to work.
- I can take you to work.
80
00:03:24,241 --> 00:03:27,789
Aww. You can ride on his
handlebars. Adorable.
81
00:03:27,790 --> 00:03:31,440
I don't have my bike, Fran.
I have my mom's car.
82
00:03:32,257 --> 00:03:34,420
OK. Let's... Lets just go.
83
00:03:34,428 --> 00:03:36,362
Fran, I... I'm sorry.
84
00:03:36,850 --> 00:03:39,060
I hope you don't think
that counts as an apology.
85
00:03:39,063 --> 00:03:40,730
I demand a better one.
86
00:03:40,733 --> 00:03:42,980
And you might have to buy me stuff, too.
87
00:03:42,987 --> 00:03:46,070
Hey...
88
00:03:46,077 --> 00:03:47,280
this is pretty cool.
89
00:03:47,287 --> 00:03:51,250
Like an adult relationship.
Driving to work together.
90
00:03:51,253 --> 00:03:53,590
Yeah, I like it.
91
00:03:53,592 --> 00:03:57,220
I just, um... Are you going to
work after you drop me off?
92
00:03:57,224 --> 00:03:59,802
Nah, I think I'm gonna
go home and take a nap.
93
00:04:00,815 --> 00:04:01,980
Cool.
94
00:04:01,983 --> 00:04:03,764
Yeah, I'm excited.
95
00:04:24,529 --> 00:04:26,860
- Have you read Gabe's article?
- Mm-hmm.
96
00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:28,660
Yeah, that was fuckin' insane.
97
00:04:28,662 --> 00:04:31,960
He's, like, going after me so
hard right now. I can't even...
98
00:04:33,630 --> 00:04:37,140
Hello? Dude. What's up?
99
00:04:37,680 --> 00:04:39,279
Oh, I'm just happy to see ya, you know?
100
00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:40,600
Not murdered and dead.
101
00:04:40,603 --> 00:04:41,850
What?
102
00:04:41,855 --> 00:04:44,535
You didn't see the hundreds of texts
I sent you from the horse show?
103
00:04:45,445 --> 00:04:46,820
Ohh.
104
00:04:46,823 --> 00:04:48,820
Oh, my God. The horse show.
105
00:04:48,827 --> 00:04:50,852
Yeah, the... the horse show.
106
00:04:50,853 --> 00:04:53,789
Fuck, Amadi, I am such a piece of shit.
107
00:04:53,790 --> 00:04:55,699
A true living piece of shit.
108
00:04:55,700 --> 00:04:57,800
I'm so, so sorry.
109
00:04:57,804 --> 00:05:00,220
I, like, had a huge fight
with my parents last night,
110
00:05:00,225 --> 00:05:02,290
and then I got home and Ryan was there,
111
00:05:02,300 --> 00:05:05,270
and he was really there
for me, and I just...
112
00:05:05,276 --> 00:05:07,580
I fucked up. I forgot.
113
00:05:08,074 --> 00:05:10,539
I'm really sorry. Please. You
know that's not my style.
114
00:05:11,832 --> 00:05:14,370
All right, well, you did
miss a very good show.
115
00:05:14,378 --> 00:05:16,500
- Oh, fuck.
- There was this tiny horse,
116
00:05:16,508 --> 00:05:18,130
and he did, like, a moonwalk thing,
117
00:05:18,136 --> 00:05:19,470
and then he stanky-legged at the end.
118
00:05:19,471 --> 00:05:21,099
- What?
- Yeah.
119
00:05:21,100 --> 00:05:23,019
Fried Snickers? Hello.
120
00:05:23,020 --> 00:05:25,020
- That sounds like a fantasy.
- It was a fantasy.
121
00:05:25,024 --> 00:05:26,764
It's happening.
122
00:05:27,697 --> 00:05:29,280
Oh. OK, I'm...
123
00:05:29,283 --> 00:05:31,450
- I'm gonna follow her.
- Mm-hmm.
124
00:05:31,453 --> 00:05:34,000
- And find out wassup.
- That was creepy as hell.
125
00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:36,379
- Yeah.
- So I figured out a way
126
00:05:36,380 --> 00:05:38,509
to link the IP addresses
with the user comments,
127
00:05:38,510 --> 00:05:41,300
- which means that...
- You found the location of my troll.
128
00:05:41,307 --> 00:05:45,229
Yeah. Yeah, you stole
that moment from me.
129
00:05:45,230 --> 00:05:47,980
OK. I'm... I'm sorry. I just...
130
00:05:47,990 --> 00:05:51,110
I've got all this troll adrenaline,
'cause I'm all jacked up.
131
00:05:51,118 --> 00:05:54,120
So uh, basically I just gotta
figure out which comments are his
132
00:05:54,124 --> 00:05:56,210
and which are just, like,
other terrible people's.
133
00:05:56,212 --> 00:05:58,749
- OK.
- Like, let's just go through it here.
134
00:05:58,750 --> 00:06:00,579
- This one says, "Oink."
- Yeah.
135
00:06:00,580 --> 00:06:02,760
This one say, "Oink, oink,
you little piggy slut."
136
00:06:02,767 --> 00:06:05,390
This one says, "You must need a
Sherpa to climb the stairs."
137
00:06:05,396 --> 00:06:06,399
"You have a snout
138
00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:08,119
- and a little piggy tail."
- OK.
139
00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:09,860
And this one, again, says, "Oink."
140
00:06:09,864 --> 00:06:11,360
- Different user, but...
- Yeah.
141
00:06:11,367 --> 00:06:13,990
You know, you actually, you don't
have to read them all out.
142
00:06:13,997 --> 00:06:16,250
His user name is just "The Awesome."
143
00:06:16,252 --> 00:06:19,800
So any of those, like, see
that one that says um,
144
00:06:19,801 --> 00:06:24,140
"Oink oink, I bet she uses a
corndog as a dildo," that's...
145
00:06:24,142 --> 00:06:25,269
- Wow.
- That's him.
146
00:06:25,270 --> 00:06:28,146
Oh, wow. 'Cause I don't
even think you could use
147
00:06:28,147 --> 00:06:29,379
a corndog as a dildo,
148
00:06:29,380 --> 00:06:31,900
because it... it would
disintegrate inside.
149
00:06:31,908 --> 00:06:35,410
Yeah. I'm not gonna actually try
and use a corndog as a dildo.
150
00:06:35,415 --> 00:06:37,459
There's no harm in trying.
151
00:06:37,460 --> 00:06:40,620
Maureen. There's some
harm in trying. Right?
152
00:06:41,176 --> 00:06:44,258
Well, just depends if
you dipped it in sauce.
153
00:06:45,561 --> 00:06:46,770
Oh, God.
154
00:06:46,771 --> 00:06:49,020
It's not... it's not the worst thing.
155
00:06:49,026 --> 00:06:52,070
- It's meat on a stick with bread...
- But the meat protects the stick.
156
00:06:56,331 --> 00:06:58,396
Stop laughing. It's true.
That's all they knew.
157
00:06:58,397 --> 00:07:01,049
- You're so mean.
- That's kinda lame...
158
00:07:01,050 --> 00:07:03,800
I can't believe you
wrote that. Honestly.
159
00:07:03,805 --> 00:07:06,010
Annie, it was a well-argued rebuttal.
160
00:07:06,018 --> 00:07:09,190
And I don't like this energy
you're throwin' at me right now.
161
00:07:09,191 --> 00:07:11,190
Yeah, you've got a bad energy, sweetie.
162
00:07:11,195 --> 00:07:14,780
This energy is because your
rebuttal was ignorant and mean.
163
00:07:14,786 --> 00:07:17,950
How can you just stomp over an
entire group of people like that?
164
00:07:17,958 --> 00:07:20,830
Maybe it's 'cause those people are
causing their own health problems.
165
00:07:20,839 --> 00:07:22,299
Maybe they need to hear that.
166
00:07:22,300 --> 00:07:24,550
Well, maybe someone needs
to stop being a bully.
167
00:07:24,555 --> 00:07:26,930
And the millennial pulls
out the bully card.
168
00:07:26,935 --> 00:07:29,810
Everyone got their cards? Not you, Andy.
169
00:07:29,816 --> 00:07:32,190
Jesus Christ, you're a gay man.
170
00:07:32,195 --> 00:07:34,030
How can you not be
sympathetic towards this?
171
00:07:34,032 --> 00:07:37,410
I was born gay. I had no choice. You do!
172
00:07:37,413 --> 00:07:40,080
Wow, that is fucked, Gabe.
173
00:07:40,086 --> 00:07:43,089
I used to idolize you, but you're
just a close-minded coward.
174
00:07:43,090 --> 00:07:44,879
You know, I think this
is gonna end badly
175
00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:46,180
unless you just walk away right now.
176
00:07:46,181 --> 00:07:47,720
Why will it end badly for me?
177
00:07:47,726 --> 00:07:50,099
Is it because I write about
things that I believe in,
178
00:07:50,100 --> 00:07:51,179
and you don't like that?
179
00:07:51,180 --> 00:07:52,690
You know, readers don't like it, either.
180
00:07:52,695 --> 00:07:54,230
No, the readers do like it,
181
00:07:54,239 --> 00:07:56,319
and I think that's actually
what you're scared of.
182
00:07:56,320 --> 00:07:57,899
They like it enough that I have two
183
00:07:57,900 --> 00:08:00,290
of the top three articles on the site,
184
00:08:00,293 --> 00:08:03,380
so maybe you're the one who
this is gonna end badly for,
185
00:08:03,382 --> 00:08:04,800
because I quit.
186
00:08:04,802 --> 00:08:06,590
I get her chair.
187
00:08:06,598 --> 00:08:08,100
Annie?
188
00:08:09,687 --> 00:08:12,060
I'm gonna give you one
chance to take that back.
189
00:08:12,066 --> 00:08:14,556
No. No, I'm not taking it back.
190
00:08:15,699 --> 00:08:18,060
I'm serious, I quit.
191
00:08:19,540 --> 00:08:22,314
I'm going troll hunting right now.
Do you wanna come with me?
192
00:08:23,214 --> 00:08:26,090
I need you to say yes, because
I don't have my car with me.
193
00:08:26,094 --> 00:08:27,470
Yeah. Yeah.
194
00:08:34,409 --> 00:08:35,860
Damn!
195
00:08:35,864 --> 00:08:37,359
That was intense.
196
00:08:37,360 --> 00:08:39,760
I know. I know. I'm,
like, kinda shaking,
197
00:08:39,770 --> 00:08:43,040
but I feel good, like, I
actually feel amazing.
198
00:08:43,045 --> 00:08:45,250
Like, I kinda feel free.
199
00:08:45,258 --> 00:08:46,630
OK, we just got the text.
200
00:08:46,636 --> 00:08:49,970
Maureen says that uh, your
troll makes a lot of posts
201
00:08:49,976 --> 00:08:51,640
from this cafe over in Forest Grove.
202
00:08:51,646 --> 00:08:54,770
So what's your plan once you find him?
203
00:08:54,777 --> 00:08:57,190
I guess I'm just gonna go
straight to full murder.
204
00:08:57,198 --> 00:08:58,820
Those are your instincts,
to go full murder?
205
00:08:58,827 --> 00:09:00,450
I wanna make him dead, I guess.
206
00:09:00,454 --> 00:09:02,370
- All right. I'm with you.
- OK.
207
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:03,750
- This'll be good. This'll be fun.
- Good.
208
00:09:03,753 --> 00:09:05,540
- It'll be a bonding experience.
- Thank you.
209
00:09:05,549 --> 00:09:07,359
Be a nice pressure reliever for me.
210
00:09:09,431 --> 00:09:11,020
Oh, my God.
211
00:09:13,314 --> 00:09:15,860
Sorry, we might have to
make a pit stop, actually.
212
00:09:15,861 --> 00:09:18,699
Those fried Snickers aren't...
they've betrayed me.
213
00:09:18,700 --> 00:09:20,870
Oh, no. That's the mini-horse's revenge.
214
00:09:20,871 --> 00:09:22,580
Uh-huh. I don't think
I got ten miles in me.
215
00:09:22,583 --> 00:09:24,710
Um, well, actually, we're pretty close
216
00:09:24,712 --> 00:09:26,750
- to my parents' house right now.
- That's great.
217
00:09:26,758 --> 00:09:29,630
A soft place for you to fall
in your time of sorrow.
218
00:09:29,639 --> 00:09:33,430
♪ ... that you're beautiful ♪
219
00:09:33,437 --> 00:09:35,650
- ♪ As you feel ♪
- Mom.
220
00:09:35,651 --> 00:09:38,320
- Um, Mom. Hey.
- Annie!
221
00:09:38,322 --> 00:09:40,910
Oh! God, I didn't know
you were coming over.
222
00:09:40,911 --> 00:09:42,740
- Hi.
- I'm sorry, I didn't think
223
00:09:42,748 --> 00:09:45,040
that you would be here, and...
224
00:09:45,044 --> 00:09:47,523
I... This is my friend Amadi from work.
225
00:09:47,524 --> 00:09:49,719
- Oh. Hi.
- Hi, Mrs. Easton.
226
00:09:49,720 --> 00:09:51,619
We were just in the neighborhood,
227
00:09:51,620 --> 00:09:53,220
and he needs to use the bathroom.
228
00:09:53,227 --> 00:09:55,100
Yeah, it's just down the hallway.
229
00:09:55,106 --> 00:09:57,190
Oh, great. Uh, thank you.
230
00:09:57,193 --> 00:09:58,940
♪ ... frustration growing ♪
231
00:09:58,947 --> 00:10:03,160
- ♪ And they don't see it showing ♪
- Uh! I used to love this song.
232
00:10:03,163 --> 00:10:06,500
But I think it's a little
unrealistic to get up every morning
233
00:10:06,504 --> 00:10:10,171
- with a smile on your face.
- Yeah.
234
00:10:10,172 --> 00:10:13,850
- ♪ With a smile on your face ♪
- Um, are you... OK?
235
00:10:13,852 --> 00:10:16,020
- Oh, yeah, I'm fine.
- ♪ All the love in your heart ♪
236
00:10:16,022 --> 00:10:18,690
Your dad went to group, and...
237
00:10:18,695 --> 00:10:21,530
I just needed to take
a rest for a minute.
238
00:10:21,534 --> 00:10:24,240
- ♪ You're gonna find, yes, you will ♪
- Well, I'm...
239
00:10:24,247 --> 00:10:26,580
- I'm really sorry about last night.
- ♪ That you're as beautiful ♪
240
00:10:26,586 --> 00:10:29,419
- And I'm really sorry about my article.
- ♪ As you feel ♪
241
00:10:29,420 --> 00:10:32,560
- I should've talked to you first.
- It's OK.
242
00:10:32,570 --> 00:10:35,810
My mother drove me crazy
till the day she died, so...
243
00:10:35,812 --> 00:10:37,350
so it's a family tradition.
244
00:10:37,356 --> 00:10:39,900
You don't drive me crazy.
245
00:10:39,904 --> 00:10:41,490
Hmm.
246
00:10:46,333 --> 00:10:49,540
You know, I told your dad
to take an extra layer
247
00:10:49,548 --> 00:10:52,381
before he went to group,
because that room is so cold.
248
00:10:53,681 --> 00:10:56,099
And then he went in the
bedroom and got a sweater,
249
00:10:56,100 --> 00:10:59,310
and afterwards he sat on
the bed for a long time
250
00:10:59,317 --> 00:11:03,266
because it just seemed to
take everything out of him.
251
00:11:04,160 --> 00:11:05,660
I'm sure he's OK.
252
00:11:05,664 --> 00:11:09,731
You know, he-he's actually
been doing so, so good.
253
00:11:10,214 --> 00:11:12,800
I used to think that if I could...
254
00:11:12,803 --> 00:11:16,510
just take care of everything enough
255
00:11:16,519 --> 00:11:18,390
and organize enough,
256
00:11:18,397 --> 00:11:21,270
I could fix...
257
00:11:21,278 --> 00:11:22,730
everything for everyone,
258
00:11:22,739 --> 00:11:26,780
and... it just turns out that I can't.
259
00:11:26,789 --> 00:11:28,790
- ♪ You're gonna find... ♪
- Yeah, well,
260
00:11:28,793 --> 00:11:31,080
you don't have to worry
about everything.
261
00:11:31,089 --> 00:11:35,006
You know, you should maybe
just take care of yourself.
262
00:11:35,640 --> 00:11:37,100
- Oh...
- Do you want me to... ?
263
00:11:37,101 --> 00:11:39,520
You two go to work. Go.
264
00:11:39,523 --> 00:11:42,270
Well, Mom, I can stay.
265
00:11:42,278 --> 00:11:43,860
No, no. I'm fine.
266
00:11:43,865 --> 00:11:46,250
- Are you sure?
- I'm totally sure.
267
00:11:46,662 --> 00:11:47,780
OK.
268
00:11:47,789 --> 00:11:50,580
OK, but call me if you need
any... Or I'll call you.
269
00:11:50,587 --> 00:11:53,800
Yeah. That'd be good. I'd like a call.
270
00:11:53,801 --> 00:11:55,550
- Have a good day!
- Thanks.
271
00:11:55,555 --> 00:11:58,195
- It was nice to meet you.
- Nice meeting you.
272
00:11:58,196 --> 00:12:00,440
Um... OK.
273
00:12:02,945 --> 00:12:04,989
You said your mom was a
big ball of anxiety.
274
00:12:04,990 --> 00:12:06,530
Seemed chill as fuck to me.
275
00:12:06,535 --> 00:12:08,370
Well, I actually think
you just witnessed
276
00:12:08,372 --> 00:12:10,910
the onset of a complete
emotional breakdown.
277
00:12:10,919 --> 00:12:12,880
So that was actually very nuts.
278
00:12:12,881 --> 00:12:14,919
OK. Think we should go
back in and let her know
279
00:12:14,920 --> 00:12:17,519
- that you just quit your job?
- Yes.
280
00:12:17,520 --> 00:12:20,680
Yes, and I want to tell her that I
once smoked a single cigarette,
281
00:12:20,689 --> 00:12:23,480
and that I also lost my virginity
in the back seat of her car.
282
00:12:23,485 --> 00:12:24,805
- Hmm.
- She would like that.
283
00:12:24,806 --> 00:12:26,780
Yeah. Plus, she'd love
your new career as a...
284
00:12:26,784 --> 00:12:28,740
... troll hunter.
285
00:12:28,746 --> 00:12:30,120
Ooh! What was that?
286
00:12:30,124 --> 00:12:32,289
That's the sound your shotgun
makes when you're huntin' trolls.
287
00:12:32,290 --> 00:12:35,740
Oh, but I don't use a shotgun.
I use a little, tiny knife.
288
00:12:43,483 --> 00:12:45,779
♪ Whoa ♪
289
00:12:45,780 --> 00:12:47,320
♪ You wore your black shoes... ♪
290
00:12:47,324 --> 00:12:49,660
All right, so this is the cafe
291
00:12:49,663 --> 00:12:51,990
your troll posts from a
lot in the afternoon,
292
00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:53,790
so he could be here now.
293
00:12:53,796 --> 00:12:55,590
What about this gym rat over here?
294
00:12:55,592 --> 00:12:57,090
- Ooh.
- I told you before, OK?!
295
00:12:57,094 --> 00:12:59,009
He's a full frickin' beefcake psycho.
296
00:12:59,010 --> 00:13:01,379
- Look at the veins in his shoulders.
- Damn!
297
00:13:01,380 --> 00:13:02,389
That's scary.
298
00:13:02,390 --> 00:13:03,980
- That could be your troll.
- Yeah.
299
00:13:03,983 --> 00:13:07,990
I feel kinda bad, though. We're,
like... we're profiling right now.
300
00:13:07,991 --> 00:13:10,240
Oh, my God, don't. Please.
People do it to me all the time.
301
00:13:10,245 --> 00:13:11,268
It's, like, "My turn."
302
00:13:11,269 --> 00:13:15,500
Oh. Holy active shooter. Look
at the mustache on that one.
303
00:13:15,507 --> 00:13:18,150
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Totally.
Full internet psycho.
304
00:13:19,402 --> 00:13:21,760
- Shit! Oh, my God.
- Be casual.
305
00:13:21,769 --> 00:13:23,860
- You... OK. Uh...
- Just be casual.
306
00:13:25,150 --> 00:13:27,070
- That was casual.
- It's him.
307
00:13:27,071 --> 00:13:28,740
It's gotta be him.
308
00:13:28,741 --> 00:13:30,467
Oh, my God. And he has his laptop,
309
00:13:30,468 --> 00:13:31,790
so we can catch him in the act
310
00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:33,160
of posting something shitty.
311
00:13:33,166 --> 00:13:35,250
All right. I gotta take this real quick.
312
00:13:35,254 --> 00:13:37,089
OK, just wait for me, all
right? I'll be right back.
313
00:13:37,090 --> 00:13:38,100
- OK.
- OK.
314
00:13:51,452 --> 00:13:52,750
Oh.
315
00:13:56,714 --> 00:13:57,983
Oh...
316
00:13:59,218 --> 00:14:01,470
- Can I help you?
- Um, yeah, maybe...
317
00:14:01,472 --> 00:14:03,100
maybe you can.
318
00:14:03,101 --> 00:14:05,719
Uh, what the fuck is up, man?
319
00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:06,980
I'm sorry, what?
320
00:14:06,984 --> 00:14:09,690
OK, I know who you are.
You're The Awesome.
321
00:14:09,698 --> 00:14:11,490
And I know you've been posting about me,
322
00:14:11,492 --> 00:14:15,199
calling me a
fat-slut-cunt-pig-bat-witch.
323
00:14:15,200 --> 00:14:17,630
I honestly have no idea
what you're talking about.
324
00:14:17,631 --> 00:14:19,960
OK, yeah, well, I saw you look
at me when I walked in here.
325
00:14:19,968 --> 00:14:21,679
You were looking at me.
326
00:14:21,680 --> 00:14:24,349
I... I just thought you were my
daughter's kindergarten teacher.
327
00:14:24,350 --> 00:14:26,980
What?! Why do... Everyone
is constantly telling me
328
00:14:26,990 --> 00:14:28,630
that I look like a kindergarten teacher.
329
00:14:28,640 --> 00:14:31,570
I'm sorry. I just dropped her
off, and I thought maybe...
330
00:14:31,575 --> 00:14:33,450
I don't know. You just look familiar.
331
00:14:33,453 --> 00:14:36,330
OK, so you don't know, like,
what I'm talking about?
332
00:14:36,334 --> 00:14:37,769
Not at all, no.
333
00:14:37,770 --> 00:14:39,879
I hope your daughter
has a very nice year
334
00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:41,420
at kindergarten. I'm...
335
00:14:41,427 --> 00:14:43,480
and I'm... I'm very sorry.
336
00:14:46,563 --> 00:14:49,359
- I was I... Sorry that I forgot. And I...
- It's not him at all.
337
00:14:49,360 --> 00:14:51,480
OK. Yeah.
338
00:14:51,489 --> 00:14:52,820
No, that's fine.
339
00:14:52,826 --> 00:14:55,950
OK. All right, I'll... I'll see
you. Good-bye. All right.
340
00:14:55,957 --> 00:14:58,620
Jesus, Cindy is pissed, dude.
341
00:14:58,629 --> 00:15:01,550
Fuck! My troll posted again!
That means we missed him!
342
00:15:01,552 --> 00:15:04,680
OK, and that sucks, but can we
actually pick this up tomorrow?
343
00:15:04,683 --> 00:15:06,720
No way! We're so close!
344
00:15:06,729 --> 00:15:08,730
Annie, did you not hear
what I said? I gotta go.
345
00:15:08,733 --> 00:15:11,570
No. Come on, man, you can't bail now.
346
00:15:11,572 --> 00:15:13,330
I'm not bailing on you, du...
347
00:15:13,340 --> 00:15:16,950
Look, I'm an adult, OK? I've
got a wife, I've got kids,
348
00:15:16,957 --> 00:15:19,370
I've got... other shit
goin' on in my life.
349
00:15:19,378 --> 00:15:21,630
- I know.
- All right, do you really, though?
350
00:15:21,633 --> 00:15:24,510
Because it seems like right now
you're way more interested
351
00:15:24,514 --> 00:15:26,349
in yourself, and your troll.
352
00:15:26,350 --> 00:15:28,100
Well, that's... that's not true.
353
00:15:28,104 --> 00:15:30,190
I mean, I have a lot going on.
354
00:15:30,192 --> 00:15:33,070
I don't have a job now,
and... and Ryan...
355
00:15:33,073 --> 00:15:35,830
Annie. You're still
talkin' about yourself.
356
00:15:37,999 --> 00:15:41,129
Now I gotta go. I'm sorry. Gotta...
357
00:15:41,130 --> 00:15:42,500
OK.
358
00:15:53,071 --> 00:15:54,870
Hello?
359
00:15:56,077 --> 00:15:57,710
Hey, Vera.
360
00:15:58,874 --> 00:16:01,355
You were right about the extra
layer, it got cold in there.
361
00:16:10,690 --> 00:16:12,450
- _
- Vancouver?
362
00:16:16,952 --> 00:16:18,450
In cell block D
363
00:16:18,454 --> 00:16:22,370
you had Irving Addison...
364
00:16:22,379 --> 00:16:24,750
But... But anyway, you had Moses...
365
00:16:24,759 --> 00:16:27,840
Ohh. It's so much worse
than I ever imagined.
366
00:16:27,849 --> 00:16:30,060
Yeah, like somehow he
managed to make it worse
367
00:16:30,061 --> 00:16:33,520
than the million other trash
podcasts out there. It's...
368
00:16:33,527 --> 00:16:34,860
Ugh. He's a moron.
369
00:16:43,129 --> 00:16:45,340
I'm good to you... right?
370
00:16:45,342 --> 00:16:47,980
Fuck yeah.
371
00:16:48,891 --> 00:16:50,350
You're the best.
372
00:17:09,348 --> 00:17:11,059
God damn it!
373
00:17:17,197 --> 00:17:18,900
My girl.
374
00:17:18,909 --> 00:17:21,789
Hey. Um, are you busy?
375
00:17:21,790 --> 00:17:23,896
Uh... not really, no.
376
00:17:23,897 --> 00:17:26,630
Um, could you maybe come and pick me up?
377
00:17:26,633 --> 00:17:29,151
Oh. Um, well,
378
00:17:29,152 --> 00:17:31,600
my mom took her car back
so she could run errands,
379
00:17:31,602 --> 00:17:35,325
but... I could probably get it back
from her when she goes to bed.
380
00:17:36,193 --> 00:17:38,410
Oh. Um...
381
00:17:38,907 --> 00:17:42,370
Or I could borrow Pete's mom's car.
382
00:17:42,372 --> 00:17:45,751
Or I could pick you up on my bike.
383
00:17:45,752 --> 00:17:48,460
No, no, um, that's OK.
384
00:17:48,468 --> 00:17:52,640
I just, um... I'm having
kind of a weird day.
385
00:17:52,644 --> 00:17:55,899
Damn. I'm sorry. Uh...
386
00:17:55,900 --> 00:18:00,320
Well, uh, what if, like, tonight...
387
00:18:00,325 --> 00:18:03,144
we do... fucking?
388
00:18:04,375 --> 00:18:06,750
That'll make you feel better. Right?
389
00:18:06,755 --> 00:18:08,800
Whenever I'm all stressed out
390
00:18:08,801 --> 00:18:10,760
and pent up with, like...
391
00:18:10,763 --> 00:18:12,849
like, stress stuff, you know,
392
00:18:12,850 --> 00:18:14,810
like, I cum and I feel... I feel good.
393
00:18:14,813 --> 00:18:18,099
Yeah, yeah, that's not really
where my head's at right now,
394
00:18:18,100 --> 00:18:19,320
so I'm gonna go, OK?
395
00:18:19,321 --> 00:18:20,900
Oh. Yeah. OK.
396
00:18:20,908 --> 00:18:22,950
Uh, sorry. Bye, Annie.
397
00:18:22,954 --> 00:18:24,710
OK. Bye.
398
00:18:28,089 --> 00:18:30,505
No!
399
00:18:31,972 --> 00:18:33,260
Unbelievable.
400
00:18:36,120 --> 00:18:39,630
_
401
00:19:28,450 --> 00:19:30,740
You're "The Awesome."
402
00:19:31,633 --> 00:19:32,800
No.
403
00:19:32,802 --> 00:19:35,111
Yes, you fucking are, you coward.
404
00:19:36,935 --> 00:19:38,600
What are you doing here?
405
00:19:38,605 --> 00:19:40,530
So you are him.
406
00:19:40,985 --> 00:19:43,029
You're the fucking monster
407
00:19:43,030 --> 00:19:44,990
who's been torturing me every day.
408
00:19:44,993 --> 00:19:47,750
I don't... I don't torture you,
I'm just expressing my opinion...
409
00:19:47,760 --> 00:19:48,910
Yeah, shut up. Just shut up.
410
00:19:48,917 --> 00:19:51,250
Do you know how fuckin' lame it is
411
00:19:51,255 --> 00:19:53,130
that you spend so much time
412
00:19:53,134 --> 00:19:55,050
trying to hurt a complete stranger?
413
00:19:55,054 --> 00:19:57,510
I'm a real fuckin' person.
414
00:19:57,518 --> 00:20:00,439
And I'm just tryin' to go
to work and do my job,
415
00:20:00,440 --> 00:20:04,265
and-and you're calling
me a pig every day?
416
00:20:04,741 --> 00:20:07,070
And you threaten to kill me,
417
00:20:07,078 --> 00:20:10,410
and you talk about my... my family...
418
00:20:10,418 --> 00:20:14,024
and what I don't understand
the most is, why?
419
00:20:14,025 --> 00:20:17,430
Is it because I'm not the type
of girl you want to fuck?
420
00:20:17,432 --> 00:20:20,140
Or maybe is it because I am the
type of girl you want to fuck
421
00:20:20,146 --> 00:20:22,230
but you're too chickenshit to admit it.
422
00:20:22,233 --> 00:20:26,490
Either way, it doesn't fuckin'
matter, because fuck you.
423
00:20:26,492 --> 00:20:29,332
Fuck you. Fuck you. I fuckin' hate you.
424
00:20:31,210 --> 00:20:32,840
I'm sorry.
425
00:20:33,924 --> 00:20:35,390
What?
426
00:20:36,387 --> 00:20:39,260
- I'm sorry.
- Oh, you're sorry.
427
00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:43,100
I'm sorry. I don't
know what else to say.
428
00:20:44,152 --> 00:20:46,489
What did I do to you?
429
00:20:46,490 --> 00:20:47,969
Honestly. What?
430
00:20:47,970 --> 00:20:50,000
I don't know.
431
00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:53,080
Pissed me off.
432
00:20:53,087 --> 00:20:56,483
That stuff that you
write, the feminist shit,
433
00:20:56,484 --> 00:20:59,850
I don't agree with a lot of it, and...
434
00:20:59,860 --> 00:21:01,620
so I thought I'd push you a little.
435
00:21:02,523 --> 00:21:04,490
Or a lot.
436
00:21:06,113 --> 00:21:08,280
I was big when I was a kid.
437
00:21:08,284 --> 00:21:10,580
And you're... overweight...
438
00:21:10,581 --> 00:21:12,499
You can say "fat." You
say it all the time.
439
00:21:12,500 --> 00:21:14,500
OK, you're fat.
440
00:21:14,505 --> 00:21:17,510
But...
441
00:21:17,511 --> 00:21:19,716
your writing is so confident.
442
00:21:21,936 --> 00:21:23,860
And I...
443
00:21:25,060 --> 00:21:29,639
I hate myself... and you don't.
444
00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:31,950
It's just, like, you're
out there yelling,
445
00:21:31,956 --> 00:21:33,855
"This is me, and fuck you
if you don't like it."
446
00:21:34,796 --> 00:21:36,260
OK.
447
00:21:36,966 --> 00:21:38,850
Made me mad.
448
00:21:41,601 --> 00:21:43,140
I'm sorry.
449
00:21:43,145 --> 00:21:45,650
OK, well, thank you.
450
00:21:46,068 --> 00:21:47,869
Thank you for your apology.
451
00:21:48,865 --> 00:21:51,119
It's weird, by... by trolling you,
452
00:21:51,120 --> 00:21:53,950
I feel like I've gotten
to know you pretty well.
453
00:21:53,959 --> 00:21:56,839
I read everything you write.
454
00:21:56,840 --> 00:22:01,080
Even the stuff that pisses
me off, it sticks with me.
455
00:22:01,140 --> 00:22:06,120
OK. Is that just a line you say
to all the girls that you troll?
456
00:22:06,191 --> 00:22:08,765
I don't troll any other girls.
457
00:22:09,991 --> 00:22:11,684
What?
458
00:22:12,872 --> 00:22:14,729
I only troll you.
459
00:22:18,880 --> 00:22:20,199
Hey, would you...
460
00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:22,570
would you want to come
inside for a drink?
461
00:22:24,604 --> 00:22:27,030
My God. No.
462
00:22:27,526 --> 00:22:28,860
Are you insane?
463
00:22:28,862 --> 00:22:30,860
That's fucking disgusting.
464
00:22:30,866 --> 00:22:34,909
You're sick. You're fucking
more psycho than I thought.
465
00:22:34,910 --> 00:22:36,119
Yeah, well, I probably
couldn't even find
466
00:22:36,120 --> 00:22:37,670
your pussy anyway, you fat cow!
467
00:22:37,671 --> 00:22:39,210
What the fuck did you just say?!
468
00:22:40,343 --> 00:22:42,639
- Fuck you!
- Fuck you, you fucking coward!
469
00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:43,890
Get the fuck off my property!
470
00:22:43,892 --> 00:22:45,140
- Fuck you!
- Fuck you!
471
00:22:45,144 --> 00:22:46,552
Moooo!
472
00:23:09,780 --> 00:23:11,690
What the fuck?!
473
00:23:11,698 --> 00:23:14,069
Get the fuck outta here! Fuck you!
474
00:23:14,070 --> 00:23:17,039
You better run, you fat bitch!
475
00:23:17,040 --> 00:23:22,040
- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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