Original subtitles

CHORUS [SINGING]: Deep in my heart

Dear

I have a dream of you

Fashioned of starlight

Perfume of roses and dew

Our paths may sever

But I'll remember forever

Deep in my heart

Dear

Always I'll dream

Of you

Anna, what do you think?

Today, I came to work on the elevated railway all by myself.

You are very brave.

I would never trust myself alone on it.

Tonight business is good, yeah?

ANNA: Like always on Tuesdays, Romy, except for the Novaks' anniversary.

The Novaks buy such a good Tokay?

Oh, this is a little present from me.

They should celebrate 50 years by drinking buttermilk?

[ANNA LAUGHS]

Who ordered wine?

With the compliments of Anna.

Many more long years you should live and be happy.

Good evening, sir.

A table, perhaps. I'll sit you down.

You got a peacherino of a place here, Miss Mueller.

Thank you.

"Berrison Musical Agency. Music, our specialty.

You write songs, we sell them."

Welcome, Mr. Berrison.

Here we love music.

Where did you get the schnitzel with the schmaltz?

The schnitzel with the schmaltz?

The Kapellmeister.

[LAUGHS]

The schnitzel with the schmaltz.

Don't let Romy hear you say this.

He is very serious with his music.

He plays here like it was Frau Sacher's in Vienna.

He sure does. If you ask me, he's a regular Johnny-Off-the-Pickle-Boat.

Oh, no. Off the boat he came since more than a year.

Still parts his hair with a towel.

It so happens, Mr. Berrison, that Romy is an accomplished musician.

A graduate from the Vienna Conservatory yet.

And a composer.

You should hear the songs he makes up.

I got other fish to fry, Miss Mueller.

[ANNA LAUGHS]

One tune won't give you the willies.

Wait here.

Sigmund, there is Mr. Berrison of the Berrison Musical Agency.

A musical agent looks like that?

What difference does it make what he looks like?

He knows all the people in music.

He can get them to publish your songs.

Ladies and gentlemen...

...here in our café, in our beloved America...

...we sometimes pause to remember for a moment where we were born.

And we are very lucky to have a new song...

...by our Romy to help us remember.

And who is going to sing it?

Anna Mueller.

[SINGING] As the years roll on after youth has gone

You will remember Vienna

Nights that were happy And hearts that were free

All joined in singing

A sweet melody

When your race is run

Whether lost or won

You will remember Vienna

You will recall evenings in May

Sweethearts who came

And vanished away

Whence did they come?

Where did they go?

Vienna

Will never let

You know

MAN 1: Bravo. Bravo.

Bravo.

MAN 2: Very well done. MAN 3: Bravo.

Wunderbar. Wunderbar.

Mr. Berrison, this is Mr. Romberg.

How do you do?

-What did you think? It was good. Yes? -Pull down your vest and gaze at the music.

The clients want modern, up-to-date, uptown stuff, not that Viennese um-pah-pah.

You're last year in 14 languages, bo.

He means you're old-fashioned.

Music is like vests or ladies' wear? It should be stylish?

Don't be such a high roller. You're doing good. It's the novelty, it'll wear off.

Place has a chance to get in hotsy-totsy time, like Shanley's, Bustanoby's...

...if you give the people what they want. This stuff I've sold to the best publishers.

ROMY: "Choo Choo to Chicago."

"Hennessy Hop."

"Boiled Shirt."

Best catalog I represented. I'm a kind of agent like this.

I not only sell songs for my boys, I try to get them played.

Baboons play songs like this.

Also write them.

Baboons with rhythm, who like to do the bunny hug and the squeeze.

The way they're dancing now isn't 1-2-3, 1-2-3.

It's 1-2, 1-2. Gotta be that way with the hobble skirts...

...otherwise the ladies hit the grit.

Today a song's gotta be a grizzly bear stepping on a tack...

...with the kind of zip that will make a leg of mutton dance.

How does a leg of mutton dance?

He means you've got to change if you wanna be a success.

With two hands tied behind my back, I'd write better songs than this.

Do that. Write me a fast ragtime-y one-step with a catchy first eight bars...

...a whistling bridge, let me peddle it.

Maybe you can make something of yourself and this rathskeller.

Good night, baron. I gotta get myself a damp bourbon poultice.

[PLAYING RAGTIME]

[ROMY HUMMING]

-Romy, you came so early. -Uh-huh.

-You are tuning the piano? -Mm-mm.

-You are playing ragtime? -Uh-huh.

I like it, Sigmund.

Is it hotsy-totsy, Anna? Am I gazing at the music?

Am I pulling down my vest?

You have words.

Right from Mr. Berrison's mouth.

So give me a listen.

[SINGING] You jazz to the left

Then you jazz to the right

Then you tickle your toe

You tickle your toe

And then you go into a bunny hug

Hold her tight as a bug in a rug

And then you step on the tack

Like you're balling the jack

With the grizzly bear in your stance

And if you be my honey lamb

We can yammy yam The leg of mutton dance

Oh, it's wonderful, Sigmund, and so Broadway.

Yes, but what does it mean? I don't understand one word.

Ach, what does that matter?

Play it again, and this time from the beginning.

[SINGING] There is a dance they do Way out in Kalamazoo

It's a pip, lots o' zip

It is a breezy brew

It's so easy you can learn to do it too

You jazz to the left Then you jazz to the right

Then you tickle your toe

You tickle your toe

And then you go into a bunny hug

Hold her tight as a bug in a rug

And then you step on a tack

Like you're balling the jack

With the grizzly bear in your stance

And if you be my honey lamb

We can yammy yam The leg of mutton dance

[SPEAKING IN GERMAN]

Do-di-do-do, do-do-do Do-di-do-do

Oh, do-do-do Do-di-do-di-do

Watch out, you're stepping on a tack

Come to me, honey 'Cause we 're ballin' the jack

The leg of mutton Talk about the mutton

-The leg of mutton dance -The leg of mutton dance

Such a sight I could look at forever.

And you will if Romberg will use his dome.

If you'll only sign this deal with me, baron...

...you will make a million spondulicks, a fortune.

Some fortune. I write a song.

All over Manhattan, people are singing and dancing it.

Fifty thousand copies people got on their pianos.

So the composer gets a check for practically nothing.

I lived up to every condition in your contract and so did the publishers.

With the publishers, I don't argue. They've been wonderful.

But you, you are too uptown for me, so goodbye.

So a diamond stickpin you don't want.

So a Packard limousine you're not interested in.

-I got a deal. -Bourgeois.

So bourgeois is the answer?

So that's what I'm supposed to say to Mr. J.J. Shubert.

"All right, bourgeois, Mr. Shubert. That's what Mr. Romberg has to say.

Bourgeois, Mr. Shubert."

-What is with Mr. Shubert? -Bourgeois, Mr. Romberg.

Maybe he really did get news from Mr. Shubert.

Now we'll never know.

Why not? Mr. Shubert is the Emperor Franz Josef...

...in Schoenbrunn castle guarded by a regiment?

Mr. Shubert is a man.

And if you ask a man a question, he answers.

So I am asking and he is answering.

[ANNA LAUGHS]

WOMAN [SINGING]: I say allo I'm wearing the smile

When I leave I heave the sigh

They say the bluebird Bring you love and romance

The only bird I like

Is wearing the pants

I love to say hello, allo

[SPEAKING IN FRENCH]

[SPEAKING IN FRENCH]

Oh, "Leg of Mutton."

I love it.

l bathe, it is the soap.

l lunch, it is the Camembert.

I make love, it is....

Well, I like it.

Monsieur J.J., this is Monsieur Romberg. He wrote "Leg of Mutton."

Oh, Romberg.

I told your agent, oh, a week ago, I wanted to see you.

I'd like to hear some of your material.

You say when, you'll hear.

Could you wait a little while?

Uh, Gaby, could we go on with rehearsal now?

Oh, no. Perhaps Mr. Romberg has something for me.

Something wonderful, Mr. Romberg?

Play it for Gaby.

Play it for Gaby, yes?

Please do one.

ROMY: Coaxed I don't need to be.

[SPEAKS IN FRENCH]

I feel it in my heart but not in my soul.

Yes, I agree with you, Gaby. I don't know.

WOMAN: It will only be the best thing in the show.

You really think so, Dorothy?

It has style, J.J., and imagination.

Thank you.

Oh, Mr. Romberg, this is Dorothy Donnelly.

Dorothy Donnelly? This name I know, and this face.

In Madame X, you are the star.

Oh, such a piece of acting you do.

-I am honored. -I'm overwhelmed.

Dorothy is right, Monsieur J.J.

Be a darling and buy Monsieur Romberg's song.

It is, for me, perfection.

But do not spend too much money.

You're a darling and I adore you.

You are the only other actress I do not mind coming to my rehearsal.

And you are the only other actress whose rehearsal I don't mind coming to.

-Thank you. -Mr. Romberg, this is Mr. Townsend.

He's in charge of everything.

Takes care of all our deals.

Shall we go, Gaby?

We pay a hundred dollars for a song, plus royalties.

But I can tell you won't be happy with that, so we'll make it 200.

The money does not interest me.

What counts is the orchestration and how you stage it.

Now, Mr. Romberg, you're an artist.

You don't wanna be bothered with details.

We're going to do wonders with your brainchild.

Oh, there's Mr. Judson, my librettist and Mr. Butterfield, my lyricist.

Now, they'll go to work on it.

And we might even think of it for the first-act finale.

Is it a deal?

-A deal it is. -Good.

Thank you, Miss Donnelly.

I owe everything to you.

Nonsense. You have talent.

That's very rare in the theater.

You have a warm smile.

That's even rarer.

Gaby, my dear, may we go on with rehearsal now?

Let's go, children.

[PIANO PLAYS]

[SINGING] I love to say allo

Allo to the boy

But I hate to say

-What happened? -What happened? Wait until I tell you.

Just wait. But first, this is Miss Donnelly, Miss Mueller.

How do you do?

-Tell already what happened. -A song he bought, 200 spondulicks.

And what's more, Mr. Townsend called him a great artist.

What's to be surprised?

Romy's only the greatest composer in the whole world.

Whoever heard of a slouch like Beethoven?

And anyhow, Beethoven never had a first-act finale starring Gaby Deslys.

A first-act finale, Romy, this is true?

Come on. Let's have a party.

[SINGING] Softly as in the morning sunrise

The light of love comes stealing

Into the newborn day

La-la-la-la-la-la

Flaming with all the glow of sunrise

The burning kiss is sealing

The vow that all betray

For the passions that thrill love

And lift you high to glory

Are the passions that kill love

And let you fall to hell

So ends the story

Softly, as in the evening sunset

The light that give you glory

She take it all away

CHORUS: Softly, softly As in the morning sunrise, sunrise

The light of loves comes Stealing, stealing

Into a newborn day

Into a newborn day

Flaming, flaming With all the glow of sunrise, sunrise

To our Romy, whom we will all miss very much.

From what should you miss me? My job?

Don't give me my walking papers so quick.

The more I see of Broadway, the more I like Second Avenue.

-Oh, excuse me. -Certainly.

Oh, Romy, we're in for a run.

You're mentioned once or twice.

Yes, in every notice, and that's a miracle because in most Shubert shows...

...the composer is usually included with the shoes and the artificial flowers.

Congratulations, Romy.

Are you sure that's the right word, Dorothy?

Or should it be "condolences"?

Oh, now we're going to have temperament.

Romberg, I'm prepared to offer you a contract that's fair and square to everyone.

Five years straight. You can't do better than that.

Any control over arrangements, orchestrations, tempo?

No control over anything.

You write the songs, we'll attend to the artistic end.

I see. You will take care of the artistic end.

Very well.

Sit down, please.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is a night to celebrate.

There is plenty of wine on the tables, there are lovely ladies everywhere...

...and only one thing is missing, the artistic end.

How about that, Anna? We can't let that happen.

Let us give Mr. Townsend five minutes of artistic end.

[SINGING] Softly, as in a morning sunrise

The light of love comes stealing

Into a newborn day

Oh, flaming

With all the glow of sunrise

A burning kiss is sealing

The vow that all betray

For the passions that thrill love

And lift you high to heaven

Are the passions that kill love

And let you fall to hell

So ends each story

Softly, as in an evening sunset

The light that gave you glory

Will take it all away

Will take it all

Away

And now, Mr. Townsend, you have heard my song the way I wrote it.

And now you know why I tell you to take your contract and go fly a kite.

Excuse me.

Surely you're not leaving.

It's your party.

In the mood I'm in, I would only spoil the fun.

May I say something that's none of my business?

I don't wanna sound harsh, I can see how you're suffering.

But I think you're making a very young mistake.

Just because things don't go the way you want them the first time is no reason to sulk.

I expected a lot tonight.

Perhaps too much.

What?

What exactly did you expect?

I thought people would hear the song and say:

"Here is a man who can write. Here is a man we'll give a chance."

A five-year contract with the Shuberts is an extremely large chance.

To write songs for galloping horses? Not for me.

I had it all ready to go to Mr. Shubert and Townsend tonight and give them this...

...say to them, "Here is your next success.

Here is what I want to do. Here is a story I can make sing."

Now, instead, I take it back to the author.

"Maytime."

Is it a story about Vienna?

No, it's about America and New York and about love.

You find it strange that a Viennese should write love songs for America?

No.

Love is love in Middle Europe or in America.

There's nothing so exciting as a man with a project he's passionate about.

But it doesn't have to happen right this minute.

Take the deal that Townsend offers. You'll have money.

You'll have to do some junk.

But what does it matter as long as it's a means to an end?

And this way, someday you'll be able to write your own ticket and Maytime.

Because above all, you'll have bargaining power.

Sign the contract.

When a woman is right, who can be righter?

Oh, Romy.

With a few Shubert hits under your belt, there'll be nothing to stop you.

Thanks to you, Dorothy.

Go in there and tell him.

ROMY: So on the dotted line, l signed S. Romberg, and l was in show business...

...which my friend I. Berlin says there is no business like.

The first one was The Whirl of the World.

It was a big hit, but I hated it.

And I told Townsend I'd never write another show except Maytime.

He politely turned me down.

I went back to New York and in my mailbox, I found an envelope with a check.

A nice one.

I found a little place to live uptown...

...and I bought a few sticks of furniture from Lans and Vantines.

And for Anna, a skunk dolman.

She told me she was crazy about it and complimented me on my taste.

But curiously enough, I never saw her wear it.

And for myself, a Ford with a self-starter and demountable rims.

Very expensive, too expensive.

My checkbook and I decided...

...what could hurt, one more show with Townsend.

Oops.

Ah.

This time, it was The Midnight Girl.

I looked forward to the opening night in Boston.

But there was only trouble.

The tenor had mumps. The understudy had stage fright.

So the leading lady welcomed me with open arms.

[SINGING] Mr. and Mrs.

Two words that to me Stand for all that is tenderest

Mr. and Mrs.

How happy we'd be On an income the slenderest

Two souls that feathered

One little nest together

Mr. and Mrs. Will always stand for you and me

Mr.

And Mrs.

I'm gonna cheer when I hear people singin' "Here Comes the Bride"

Mr.

And Mrs.

It will be hard to believe That it's you standin' by my side

And when the preacher says "Do you, sir?"

I'll shout out, "'Deed I do, sir"

Then come the kisses

And Mr. and Mrs. is a dream come true

[CROWD APPLAUDS]

ROMY: Another hit, but for me, a sickness.

"Only Maytime," I told Townsend.

"No other show for truly yours. "

Such a fisheye I got.

Back home, I went and made the same mistake.

I looked in the mailbox.

So I got me an English tailor and a few new suits.

And a quiet little racing car.

A Mercer.

And you guessed it, wrote another show for Townsend, Dancing Around...

...with the O'Brien Brothers.

BOTH [SINGING]: I love to go swimmin' with women

And women love swimmin' with me

I pretend that I'm a crab And their pretty ankles grab

Who wouldn't be a lobster in the sea

For peaches all fall on the beaches

And picking 'em's my specialty

I get those Navy notions When I see floating queens

l dive right in the ocean And I play submarines

BOTH: Oh, I love to go swimmin' with women

And women love swimmin' with me

CHORUS: I love to go swimmin' with women

-And women love swimmin' -And women love swimmin'

Come on, let's go swimmin'

-And women love swimmin' -And women love swimmin'

Come on, let's go swimmin'

-And women love swimmin' with -And women love swimmin' with

-And women love swimmin' with me -And women love swimmin' with me

You don't have to tell me. You hate it.

I know, I've ruined your work.

You're a hack and you don't care that it's a smash.

Have you anything to add?

Yes, the smashes are smashing me.

-This time, I'm really through. -You'll be back.

Only for Maytime. Nothing else.

Only Maytime.

Read it once.

-Who needs it? -I do.

Look, Romy, if I wanna do a Viennese Operetta...

...all I have to do is send a cablegram and get the whole works.

Composer, book, set, costumes, everything.

Why should I gamble on a new production?

Because with a new production, maybe you could have a work of art.

I'm only interested in making money.

People who collect garbage also make money.

I deserve better than that from you.

You don't know how to handle this.

But you do, eh?

I took your advice once.

"Wait until you get in a bargaining position," you said.

How long do I have to wait to get in it, until I'm too old to bargain?

You're in it now but you shouldn't talk to Townsend.

Talk to Shubert.

Meet me at the Astor for lunch tomorrow.

I'm dying and she's talking about eating.

On Broadway, Romy, you should've learned by now...

...lunch is not for eating.

Lunch is for conniving.

Table 17.

DOROTHY: Oh.

-Hello. -How nice to see you enjoying your lunch.

DOROTHY: Good afternoon. Good afternoon.

-Won't you sit down? ROMY: Frightfully sorry...

...we have another engagement. You're very kind.

DOROTHY: Why, hello, Flo.

Hello, Dorothy.

Flo, this is Mr. Sigmund Romberg, the composer, Mr. Ziegfeld.

I've heard of you, Mr. Romberg.

And who has not heard of you, Mr. Ziegfeld?

Flo, I had to tell you. I adored the Follies. I just adored them. I gushed.

Well, how sweet of you, Dorothy, and how perceptive.

Sit down and tell me more.

We have a minute, don't we, Romy?

l think so.

I loved so many things, Flo. I simply can't begin to tell you.

Especially the "Pearl of the Persian Sea" number.

Romy thought it was the greatest music he'd ever heard.

Did you indeed, Mr. Romberg?

The beat fascinated me.

And the remarkable national feeling which somehow was very American.

Particularly the passage that went:

Bom-bom-bom-bom Bom-bom

Bom-bom-bom-bom Bom-bom

Bom-bom-bom

What's that, Dorothy?

Oh, just something that Mr. Romberg is trying to interest Mr. Shubert in.

Oh, I see.

Shubert, did you say?

It couldn't be, could it, Dorothy, that Mr. Shubert is having lunch here?

Could be, Flo.

And watching us, Mr. Romberg?

Like a hawk, Mr. Ziegfeld.

In that case, wouldn't it be wise if I take the script into my hands...

...look at it rather gravely, smile at Mr. Romberg...

...and then as an added fillip, put it into my pocket...

...and shake Mr. Romberg's hand warmly?

Oh, it would be a great help, Flo.

And now with my sixth sense, for which I'm world-famous...

...I think, probably, Mr. Shubert is going to get up...

...and is going to walk over here very casually.

Your sixth sense is hitting on all six cylinders, Mr. Ziegfeld.

[DOROTHY LAUGHS]

In that case, I shall rise and we shall shake hands again...

...and this time, a little too warmly.

-Good afternoon, everybody. DOROTHY: Good afternoon.

-Good afternoon, Mr. Ziegfeld. -Hello.

-Loved the Follies. -Loved Dancing Around.

Thank you. Starting a new one soon?

Might. Just might.

-How about you, Mr. Shubert? -Might, just might, huh?

-Well, goodbye, Bert. -Goodbye, Mr. Ziegfeld.

-Goodbye, Mr. Shubert. -Goodbye, Mr. Ziegfeld.

Dorothy, this has been an extremely profitable afternoon.

I shall be in touch with you very shortly...

...and then we may talk about "Pearl of the Persian Sea."

-Won't you sit down? -Thank you.

Well, the critics were very kind to you for your performance in Madame X...

...but they should have seen you just now, you outshone yourself.

l was merely congratulating Flo on the Follies.

Oh, were you?

And you, Romy, I loved that moment when you were merely selling him the song.

I was merely humming one of the tunes from the Follies.

You were?

I think that you were merely barging in on Ziegfeld...

...to make us think he was interested in Maytime.

Oh, dear, they've guessed.

Our whole plot has been discovered.

You must think we're all kinds of fools to fall for this shenanigan.

-Oh, no. -You're much too smart.

And far too experienced.

Well, I shall not be intimidated or coerced into doing it.

That second-rate imitation Viennese...

...Wiener schnitzel Mitteleuropa Operetta, Maytime.

TOWNSEND: Is that clear?

-Completely. -And utterly.

[SINGING] To paradise

The land so far away

The land of endless day

To paradise

My dear, I've lost the way

So far I've gone astray

No hand to clasp in mine

No guiding star

Ah, love

Lead me where you are

In your loving eyes

There my paradise

Lies

[GIRLS LAUGHING]

Ah, love is so sweet in the springtime

When blossoms are fragrant in May

No years that are coming can bring time

To make me forget, dear, this day

I'll love you in life's gray December

The same as I love you today

My heart ever young

Will remember

The thrill it knew

That day in May

Sweetheart, sweetheart, sweetheart

Will you love me ever?

Will you remember this day

When we were happy in May?

My dearest one

Sweetheart, sweetheart, sweetheart

Though our paths may sever

-To life's last faint ember -To life's last faint ember

-Will you remember -Will you remember

-Springtime -Springtime

-Love-time, May? -Love-time, May?

I'm afraid that's all I have to say to you.

Oh, one more question, Mr. Romberg. What are your future plans?

I'm glad you ask me that.

A composer looks always for a story which is compatible with his own integrity.

And I flatter myself that once again I have found it.

Here we are.

Magic Melody. I'm already working on the score.

Will it be as big a success as Maytime?

Success? What is that?

The only important place for a show to be a success is in one's own heart.

-May I present Mr. Townsend to Miss -? -Zimmermann.

-Zimmermann of the -? -Milwaukee, Wisconsin Gazette.

-Miss - -How are you?

-Cranbrook from - -Fresno, California...

-... Trumpet. -Fresno. And mister -

-Mulvaney. -Mulvaney, yes.

-Shreveport, Louisiana, Clarion. -Clarion, good.

-It was a pleasure meeting you. -I'm sure it was. Thank you.

Be sure to let me see your articles before you print.

-Of course. -Thank you...

-Goodbye. -...and goodbye.

Oh, these interviews are becoming such a bore.

I really must get myself a place in the country where I won't be disturbed.

What's this Magic Melody you told them about?

It's my next show.

Your next show is Jazza Doo. Romy, you promised.

And I'm already committed to Al Jolson.

I read the book, Bert, it's junk. It's not for me.

I don't feel it.

It's a grade A, first-class, sure-fire investment.

You'll only make a fortune.

The only thing you ever think about is money, Bert.

Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot.

You don't care anything about money. That's why you spend it so fast.

You can't bear to hold it in your hands.

Now, don't change the subject. The reason I asked you to come here...

...is because I'm willing to let you in on Magic Melody.

-Let me in on it? -Exactly.

I shall be in charge of the, let us say...

...artistic end, and you can finance it.

What you're saying is you wanna produce it and you want me to bankroll it.

If you want to put it that way, yes.

The way I wanna put it is this.

If I risk my capital, I wanna be the guy who makes the mistakes.

That's the only way I produce shows.

Bert, we've been together a long time and I hate to say this...

...but the only way that I can do Magic Melody is by myself.

I'm sorry, but that's the way it has to be.

Well, if that's the way you want it, Romy.

Now, we'll go back, we have a glass of wine...

...something to eat, and we start again.

Yes, it's all over, Romy.

It isn't over, Dorothy. Not yet.

I'm broke. I owe money.

But you don't. You didn't listen to the lawyer.

-I listen to my conscience. -You will pay in time.

Stop making a mountain out of it. We trust you.

It wasn't just Magic Melody, Romy.

You endorsed too many notes for friends.

-You were overgenerous and overkind. -l was also a smart aleck.

Oh, forget it and go back to work.

Thanks for putting citronella on the mosquito bites.

I've learned my lesson.

And a fellow named Bert Townsend deserves to hear me say it.

ROMY: Gentlemen, let me introduce myself.

My name is Sigmund Romberg.

I am a songwriter and nothing else.

Do you, by any chance, need some tunes for your next show?

-Romy. -Romy.

-I said prayers... -Romy.

...I lit candles, and you're back.

I shouldn't let you know how glad lam.

And I'm sorry. Let's face it.

Show business is like everything else, a bunch of specialists.

Each with his own ego, his own talents, his own limitations.

Somebody's got to be the mixing spoon. So from now on, you mix and I'll write.

And we've gotta make it quick.

Romy, we're in trouble with Jazza Doo.

I've gotta get in rehearsal by yesterday.

In rehearsal you'll get. Do like always.

We'll go out of town. We'll go to Saranac Lake and we'll work.

Yeah, but I need this pie in two weeks, two short weeks.

Metropolitan Life should give you such insurance.

We wouldn't eat, we wouldn't sleep, we wouldn't shave.

In blood we swear it.

We wouldn't even shave.

[PIANO PLAYING LOUDLY]

MEN [SINGING]: Jazza jazza Doodoo

ROMY: Sing with me.

MEN: Good old-fashioned voodoo

JUDSON: Oh, that's voodoo, voodoo.

ROMY: Maybe you've heard a hot chansonette

Sailors and sister You ain't heard nothing yet

Oh, the jazza jazza Doodoo

BUTTERFIELD: Razzmatazz's through.

ROMY: Razzmatazz is through

See here. This noise must stop.

We came up here for rest and quiet.

JUDSON: It's great. BUTTERFIELD: Yeah.

Stop it. Do you hear me? Stop it.

[MUSIC STOPS]

[GASPS]

[SCREAMS]

She's right. We must be driving the people crazy.

-Including me. -Maybe we ought to take a breather.

Banana oil. We got a commitment to meet a deadline.

In blood we swore it.

Stop banging. How can I think?

The kind of schmaltz you write needs thinking? Let's work.

Romy, let us pull the pieces of the book together.

You go for a walk.

Buy an ice cream cone, huh?

Okay, if there is a delay, kindly remember to tell Mr. Townsend from whence it comes.

Now, don't take a nap. Work.

Do you hear me? Work.

WOMAN: Yoo!

See here, my man, we've a blowout.

I'll give you 50 cents if you'll fix it.

Lady, what do I know from blowouts?

-I'll give you a dollar. -Lady, you can give me a million dollars.

LILLIAN: Did you find anybody?

Well, there's one of the natives here but he's reluctant.

LILLIAN: Well, offer him some money.

I did, but it's no use.

LILLIAN: Try again. Offer him more money.

Lady, I would do it for free if I can do it but who could do it?

Offer him $5 if necessary.

If you don't, we'll be here all night.

Money won't do any good, Lillian.

The man's just too lazy to lift a finger.

I am not lazy. I just don't happen to know from blowouts.

That's absurd. Any man knows how to fix a flat tire.

Now, look, lady, I don't want to argue with you but -

You got a flat tire?

Yes, we've got a flat tire.

How did it happen?

How it happened is of no importance. We've got to fix it.

Yes, of course. I -

Aha. You've got a nail.

I rather imagined we had something. Would you mind taking it out?

ROMY: Oh, yes, of course, I -

[GROANS]

-Perhaps we'd better leave it in. -I don't see what sense that would make.

Well, you see, we pump the tire.

The nail will prevent the air from escaping through the hole by plugging it.

And you'll be able to get to wherever it is that you are going.

-Where are you going? LILLIAN: To the lodge.

ROMY: Are you staying there? LILLIAN: Yes.

I've never used one of these before, have you?

Oh, certainly. You just take this end over here and you apply it - Uh....

No, that can't be it. No.

You're looking at it. You don't want me to help?

No, stay where you are. I'll have everything shipshape in a jiffy.

Don't go too far away. I need your inspiration.

Don't get familiar.

-It's working. ROMY: -Of course.

That was an excellent suggestion.

I think we ought to get back to the lodge so we don't lose any time or any air.

We're very grateful.

If I were you, young man, I wouldn't spend all this money on moonshine.

Remember, a penny saved is a penny earned.

Ladies and gentlemen, you may have noticed that for the past few days...

...I've been playing tunes by Sigmund Romberg...

...because he's a guest of our hotel.

I'd been hoping he'd put in an appearance, and at last he has.

He's the composer of that wonderful new operetta, Maytime.

And here he is, ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Sigmund Romberg.

You may need this again sometime.

You can't be the same man.

Can't you smell the shaving cream?

-I may sit? -Of course.

I'm not quite sure what my attitude should be, Mr. Romberg.

-I've a number to choose from. -Choose the nice one.

I'm embarrassed. It was natural enough for me...

...to think you were Rip Van Winkle. You shouldn't have let me get away with it.

Only for one hour and 43 minutes, Miss -

-How may I address you? -Harris. Lillian Harris.

Enchanted, Miss Harris.

You may not be.

Did you get a phone call about 3 this morning to stop banging on that piano?

-Me. -If I'd known it was you, I'd have stopped.

I know it's a crazy way to work.

No one's figured out a way to put on a show that was not crazy.

Are you writing a new show?

I hope it's something like Maytime. I sing it endlessly.

-I'd love to hear you. -No, you wouldn't. I can't carry a tune.

But you can dance to one? Shall we try?

If you keep it simple and straightforward.

Please.

Well, I've never done that before.

-You dance like Irene Castle. -Are you sure you're talking about me?

Not only that, but your feet obey your head.

-I think everything should. -Not everything.

BUTTERFIELD & JUDSON: Psst!

Smith brothers are trying to catch your eye.

Yes. Uh, let's ignore them.

-Are they the men you're working with? -Uh-huh.

LILLIAN: They look desperate and determined.

Not nearly so desperate and determined as I.

Well, it's a waste, Mr. Romberg, because I've an engagement.

So you might as well make them happy.

-Good night. It was nice. -Tomorrow, perhaps?

-Well, I'm playing golf at 9. -What a coincidence. So am I.

-Nine sharp. -Nine, very sharp.

Good night.

The weirdest thing, Lillian.

They said there was a phone call.

I jiggled the receiver and nothing happened.

Oh, I wouldn't say that, Mother.

l wouldn't say that at all.

[CAR HORN HONKS]

-Where's Romberg? -Bert.

-Hi, Bert, he's golfing. -Golfing?

He's about as athletic as a hot-water bag.

It isn't athletics as much as it is love.

Love. Not Romberg. He's been vaccinated against it.

The immunity's worn off.

He's got the worst case of galloping love in medical history.

-I'll fix that. -Well, you can't interfere with love, Bert.

When you got a show in the balance, you can interfere with anything.

And nobody knows that better than Romberg.

-Where can I cool my throbbing temples? -In there.

You fellows live here?

[ROMY WHISTLING]

Boys, boys, boys. Please, we gotta get everything cleaned.

In five minutes, I'm expecting some guests for tea.

Tea. I've got to order tea. Where's the phone?

Hello, operator? Give me room service.

WOMAN: -Room service. -Tidy up.

JUDSON: Room service? ROMY: Right.

-Room service. -I'm coming.

Hello, room service. This is bungalow number 3.

-I want to order tea for five. -Five?

-That's right. Have you got some blini? -No.

No. Well, then send me some beluga caviar. Very, very cold.

And Westphalian ham, sliced very thin just like prosciutto.

-No ham. JUDSON: -Prosciutto.

I see. Well, in that case, give me prosciutto.

-How many orders? -That belongs on the chair.

I want some pâté de foie gras if it's from Strasbourg.

-Petit fours. -That's my lead sheet.

-Hothouse grapes. -No hothouse grapes.

JUDSON: Watch out. -I suppose you don't have time.

-No. -Never mind and thank you.

-The telephone. -No jokes when they arrive.

The old lady is a real Cholly Knickerbocker type of lady.

Be good enough to forget that you heard of Shubert Alley.

Sure, forget Shubert Alley. Forget Shubert. What else do we forget, Jazza Doo?

-Hello, Bert. -"Hello, Bert"?

ROMY: Out. Up from the floor. -Listen, Romy, what's going on?

Please. I'm involved in a little situation and there's been a slight delay.

-These things happen. -Yes, so can bankruptcy happen.

I've got a cast, out-of-town bookings, a costume design working out.

I gotta get to rehearsal and I'm about to get an ulcer.

-What have you got? -Never mind what I've got. I got.

That's what I came to hear about.

Gotta hear it now? You couldn't wait till 10 or 11 tonight?

By 10 or 11, I wanna have heard it three times.

By 10 or 11:00 tonight, you'll have heard it five times.

-Listen, Romy, I - -Bert, this is a private party.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

Already, it's public.

Tidy up the piano, the chair in position, cabinets -

Beer bottle showing. Under the cushion.

Uncross legs. You're out of your mind. Put the clubs by the piano.

Be rather attractive. Chair in position. Bottles are showing.

-Hide them in the desk. JUDSON: -Hat.

Hat? Oh, yes, hat. Get rid of the hat. There.

Now please, be gentlemen, gentlemen.

Won't you please come in, Mrs. Harris?

How do you do?

-I think you've met my mother. -Oh, yes, indeed I have.

I even owe her a dollar.

Well, allow me to introduce these gentlemen.

This is Mr. Butterfield, whose work is not entirely unknown in the field of light verse.

And this is Mr. Judson, an author of some note.

And Mr. Townsend, the distinguished impresario.

Mrs. Harris and Miss Harris.

-How do you do? -How do you do?

Won't you please sit down?

I suggest the sofa.

I think you will find it particularly comfortable.

It's been a lovely day, hasn't it, Mrs. Harris?

Slightly hot, I think.

Oh, yes, very, very hot.

Don't you agree, Mr. Townsend?

It may get hotter.

These gentlemen are writing a play up here, Mother.

-A play with music. -With music.

Oh, I loved The Mikado.

Oh, fine.

We were just about to hold an audition, Mrs. Harris...

...and it isn't often that we allow outsiders to hear a run-through.

But perhaps your charming daughter can persuade Mr. Romberg.

Oh, I'd love to hear it.

I'm afraid it's not quite ready to hear. Not nearly.

That is to say, it's rather rough.

And I mean rough.

Oh, how modest you are, Romy.

These people will think that you don't want them to hear your work.

You act as if you were ashamed of it.

Mr. Townsend is joking, of course.

But I'd like to hear it.

I loved The Mikado.

Perhaps another time, Mrs. Harris.

There's no time like the present.

Well?

All right, I'll start.

You see, this Doodoo is a fast-living playboy...

...and he's been cutting capers with every cutie in town.

But he's putting all that behind him. He is getting married the very next day.

In the first scene, he's having his bachelor's dinner.

Yes, saying goodbye to all his loose-living friends.

Here's the switch. All those loose-living friends are dames.

You get it, Bertie? No men.

A bachelor's dinner with dames.

Dames all over the place. In the corners, on the piano.

-Hanging from the chandelier. -Wait a minute.

You're leaving out all the finer points of the story.

You see, Mrs. Harris, this is really the story of the regeneration of a man.

The action takes place in an old English castle in dear old England.

As the curtain rises, we learn that Doodoo, short for Lord Dumont Doolittle...

...is getting married on the morrow.

[PIANO PLAYING]

It is true that on the occasion of his bachelor dinner, only ladies are present.

But this is because he's bidding them all a final and definite farewell.

[SINGING] I'm saying goodbye, May Goodbye, Fay

You know why I'm leaving

Goodbye, Bess, goodbye, Jess

Stop your sighs and grieving

All those pretty tears you're sheddin'

Wipe away

For my pals shall be gay On my wedding day

l must say goodbye, Nell, goodbye, Belle

Don't you tell on me, dear Goodbye, you, and you too

Please take back your key, dear

Sweeter than you should to me

You've all been awfully good to me

Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye

Goodbye, goodbye, girls

Mwah.

Goodbye

That's the first scene. As the second scene begins...

...we find Doodoo standing at the sideboard, enjoying breakfast.

Suddenly, there's a knock at the door.

It's Lady Millicent, his fiancée.

She enters. "Millicent," he says, "it's fair and English you are...

...with your English hair and skin and the downs in your tweeds."

But Lady Millicent holds up her hand for silence.

[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] Listen to what I have to say.

How am I to begin? I can't and yet, I must.

Very well, then, here it is. I love another.

There, it's out. I love another. I said it. I'm glad.

Do you quite understand? I love another.

It's a hymn in my breast and my heart won't stop singing:

I love another. I love another.

I love another.

[IN NORMAL VOICE] You love another?

[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] I love another.

[IN NORMAL VOICE] His name?

[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] He's Reginald Percival...

...Archibald Algiman Frankable Constable Utical Smythe.

[IN NORMAL VOICE] Binky Smythe?

[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] Binky Smythe.

[IN NORMAL VOICE] Binky? Why, I can't believe... Why, he's my best frie - Bink -

[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] Bink - Doodoo, I know what you must be thinking.

But before I go, all I can say to you is:

[SINGING] Follow, follow your heart

[IN NORMAL VOICE] Shattered, his heart in pieces...

...Doodoo contemplates leaping out the window.

But he changes his mind and rings for Fribens, the old family butler.

Fribens enters.

You rang, sir?

Yes, I rang. What am I to do? Millicent, who pledged a betroth to me...

...has now pledged a betroth to another. What on earth am I to do?

If you will take the advice of a very old butler, sir...

...you will get on the next boat trained to Paris...

...and there, you'll fall in love with the very next girl that you'll see.

An excellent suggestion. That's what I shall do.

I'm off to Paris and there, I shall fall in love with the very next girl that I see.

[SINGING] The very next girl I see

Will be the right girl for me

The first alarming, charming miss That I discover

I'm gonna woo her, go right to her Say I love her

Strolling down the Champs Élysées, Doodoo comes across a little café.

And in it, there's a little chanteuse. As he enters, she is singing:

[SINGING] Voulez-vous

Rendezvous avec moi?

He does. In her flat, overlooking the flower markets of Paris...

...she tells him what's in her heart.

[SPEAKS IN FRENCH]

"Doodoo, dearie, I love you."

[SPEAKS IN FRENCH]

"I have need of you."

Allo, Doodoo. "Hello, Doodoo."

And again, he does. He takes her in his arms.

He's about to crush her lips with his, when those eyes, that mouth, that face.

No, it can't be. It is.

The image of Lady Millicent come to haunt him in his dreams.

Realizing that he can never love another woman, he decides to leap out the window.

And he does.

[GASPS]

Second act. Realizing at last he must follow his heart...

...Doodoo decides to take a trip around the world. New Zealand. New Caledonia.

New Amsterdam. New England. New York. New Rochelle. New Orleans. Newport.

Marrakesh.

Ever seeking adventure, he wanders into the slave market...

...mysterious with its languid perfumes and exotic rhythms.

[IMITATES MOROCCAN MUSIC]

Then suddenly, he is confronted by two giants.

Guards from the caliph's palace.

[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] Come on, you.

[IN NORMAL VOICE] And he does.

They drag him into the throne room and fling him at the feet of the caliph.

See here.

The caliph eyes him ominously.

The all-seeing eye has seen you, Lord Dumont Doolittle...

...and the finger of fate has writ that you shall marry my daughter, Fatima.

But see here, Your Majesty, I can't marry a total stranger.

Uh-uh-uh-uh.

I advise you to put aside this futile protest or I'll have you boiled in oil.

Besides, why should you complain?

In all of Marrakesh, there is none so lovely, nor none so fat.

[SINGING] See my fat, fat, fat Fatima

She's my favorite child My favorite child

You ought to see my fat, fat Fatima

She is gentle and mild

And not very wild

Fatima's size is really out of bounds

She's a good 200 pounds

This is just a guess, maybe more or less

Twenty, 30, 40, 50

My Fatima's neat and nifty

Oh, my fat, fat Fatima

She is very voluminous

Fill up a roominous From top to bottomous

She's a hippopotamus

So ginger-snappable

Sit-on-her-lapable

Fatima's a fabulous girl

Doodoo refuses to marry Fatima.

They take him to the grounds and put the kettle on to boil.

The drums are banging away. This is the end for Doodoo.

His life flashes before his eyes like a giant kaleidoscope...

...ever since the day when he sang:

Goodbye, May, Goodbye, Fay Goodbye, girls, goodbye

He's having breakfast. Knock on door. Millicent.

I love another. You love another? His name? Binky. Binky?

So follow, follow your heart

Shattered, destroyed, he rings for Fribens.

You rang? I rang. She loves another. Take the boat trained to Paris.

Excellent suggestion.

The very next girl I see Champs Élysées

Voulez-vous Rendezvous avec moi?

It can't be. Millicent.

Out the window, back in. Second act. Trip around the world. Marrakesh.

Giant guards. Come on. In the throne room, falling down.

Marry my daughter.

Fatima's a fabulous girl

He refuses to marry her.

This makes him nervous and he perspires copiously.

Being a gentleman, he wipes his face dry.

His hands are black from the soot in the kettle.

When he wipes his face, it gets black. The more he wipes it, the blacker it gets.

He begins to look like the natives. The natives look at him in awe.

They think it's a miracle and they're kowtowing to Doodoo.

Doodoo doesn't know what's happened. He plays along.

He joins in the jungle chant.

Jazza jazza Doodoo, jazza jazza Doodoo

Jazza jazza Doodoo, jazza jazza Doodoo

Suddenly Lady Millicent appears.

Realizing it's Doodoo she loved all along, they fly into each other's arms.

The natives make Doodoo the caliph and he leads them in the finale with:

Jazza jazza Doodoo

Good old-fashioned voodoo

Maybe you've heard Some hot chansonette

Sailors and sister You ain't heard nothing yet

The jazza jazza jazza Doodoo

Razzmatazz is through

[WHISTLING]

Yeah

So let me introduce to you

The jazza jazza doo doo doo

It's got me goofy

The jazza jazza doo doo doo

I'm going daffy

The jazza jazza doo doo doo

Mammy

The jazza jazza

Jazza jazza doo doo doo

Yeah

It's just what I wanted, Romy.

-Uses lots of costumes, lots of dames - -Wait.

It's not what we're going in with. It still needs a lot of work.

Oh, nonsense, Romy, it's exactly what we're going in with.

-You liked it, didn't you, Mrs. Harris? -Oh, yes, it was charming.

-Come along. Good afternoon, gentlemen. ROMY: -Wait a minute. Please, Mrs. Harris.

All right, put them down somewhere.

Quickly, boys, quickly.

Please don't go. There's plenty to eat.

Enough, I should judge, for a regiment.

I dislike waste.

Thank you. It was nice to meet you.

Thank you too, Mr. Romberg.

Excuse me.

[ROMY IMITATING BIRDCALLS]

Rather strange-sounding bird.

That isn't a bird, Lillian. That's your Mr. Romberg.

How do you know?

It was inevitable. If I may make a suggestion...

...you'd better go down and meet him and be very sensible.

I can hardly look at you.

For that matter, I can hardly look in the mirror at myself.

I didn't want to do it.

l was maneuvered into it.

It turned out pretty awful.

Well, it wasn't all awful.

Wasn't it?

Yes, it was.

I suppose you know how I feel about you.

Yes, I know.

I've tried to think of some very delicate and persuasive things to say.

And I've tried to think of some answers that wouldn't hurt you.

In that case, it might be better to say nothing at all.

It's too bad, really.

This is quite the perfect setting for a love scene.

A painted backdrop with a canvas sky...

...and a papier-mâché lake shimmering from the light of a cardboard moon.

Music drifting across the water.

You, the leading lady with your eyes shining and your heart ready...

...and mine ready too.

It's too bad, really.

Yes, I guess it is.

Good morning, Miss Harris.

Oh, wasn't it sweet of Mr. Romberg to send these violets?

When I got violets this morning...

...you could've knocked me over with a feather.

That Mr. Romberg is just an angel.

I thought for a moment Mr. Romberg had forgotten me.

But no, I have mine too.

Do you assume these violets have any special significance?

No, Mother. No significance whatever.

Oh, Mr. Romberg, thank you very much.

-Oh, so beautiful. -He's so sweet.

Say, what's going on here? Every woman in the place has got a bunch of violets.

-Weren't they supposed to? -I told you to send them to Miss Lillian Harris.

Mr. Townsend came in and said you were excited...

...and so in love that you wanted every woman to share in it.

Share in -? That's the last thing in the world I wanted.

Oh, but Mr. Townsend was so charming.

Oh, if I've done anything wrong, I'll just die.

It's not your fault.

Mr. Townsend's charm is the same as is Frankenstein's, and just as lethal.

Excuse me, Mrs. Harris.

About the episode with the violets, a friend of mine tried to play a little joke.

Not very well-intentioned, not very funny, but just a joke.

I'm terribly sorry.

Sure you are...

...but that doesn't change the fact that it was done, Mr. Romberg.

-Lillian found it very trying. -Well, the point is -

The point is, these things will continue to be done...

...and continue to be trying. You know that as well as I do.

You do not suit each other in so many ways.

Such as?

You live in a world of vulgarity.

I use the word in the strict Latin sense.

An uninhibited world of practical jokes and jazz.

That exhibition yesterday afternoon was a point in fact.

At least you had the good grace to be embarrassed.

Not at all. I don't claim that Jazza Doo is The Mikado.

The Mikado is not La Bohème.

Gilbert and Sullivan and Puccini composed for the people...

...who paid to hear their music, just as I do.

I'm not embarrassed by trying to please them.

Oh, you force me to say, Mr. Romberg, that your music does not please me.

-What does, only opera? -Certain operas.

-Concerts? -The symphony.

What about movies?

A few foreign films. Why am I being cross-examined?

I'm trying to see if you're consistent. You're missing out on many things.

I planned it that way.

You've got to get with the 20th century.

I don't got to get with anything, Mr. Romberg.

-What in the world did you say to her? -I am not the issue, Lillian.

My taste in music is, and so is yours.

You've upset her. I told you she was difficult.

I tried to be nice. She knows the answers. Her mind is made up ahead of time.

Then why argue with her?

What else can you do with a woman like that?

-Apologize. -For what, the violets?

I wasn't talking about the violets. For the present, I prefer to forget them.

-Lillian, if you had a sense of humor - -I have. An excellent one.

And I must say, these last two days have been very, very funny.

So Jazza Doo is a year old, and Romy, a year older.

And carrying on in the tradition that she started more than 10 years ago...

...Anna is giving the party.

And what a nice night it is for a party.

I'd like to talk a little bit about Romy.

Do you know that I didn't realize until Bertie told me a few minutes ago...

...that at this moment...

...there are 12 companies of Maytime running in the United States.

Pretty good for the kid from Vienna.

In 10 years, he's become one of the major fixtures of the American theater.

-He was even a producer once. -Hey.

But I don't think we ought to talk about that.

No.

The wonderful thing about Romy is, is that he hasn't really begun.

So I'd like to drink to the music yet to come.

The great love songs and the great waltzes still in his heart.

-Hear, hear, Romy. -Cheer.

Thank you, Dorothy.

I feel a little embarrassed and somewhat sheepish...

...especially about that last remark.

The great waltzes and the beautiful love songs.

The score which I've just finished for Artists and Models doesn't exactly qualify.

-Best commercial job you've ever done. -Even better than Jazza Doo.

Even better than Jazza Doo, a pleasure.

Well, you've all drunk to me, so let me drink to you.

I can't tell you how nice it is to be back home...

...among my friends.

Those speeches were wonderful, but let's talk a little business.

Dorothy, you're on the stand.

Oh, not now, Bert.

Why not "not now"?

Romy, Dorothy's been sitting at the typewriter...

...writing The Stupid Prince.

Oh, no, Anna, The Student Prince.

[LAUGHING]

Well, Stupid Prince or Student Prince, what is it, a play, a novel?

It's a play that will need music.

It was rather a success in Germany under the title of Old Heidelberg.

I've been adapting it.

Why didn't you tell me?

I didn't dare until I thought it was good enough.

And now I'm immodest enough to think it is.

I might even let you write the score.

l wouldn't let anybody else do it.

In my book, it's the wedding of two geniuses.

Romy, Dorothy read it to me and I cried like a baby.

I can't imagine anything more exciting and more wonderful...

...but the way I feel just now, I -

But Bertie would give us time.

We could go to Bermuda or somewhere and Anna would chaperone us.

-Oh! Who would chaperone me? -Me.

Well, this is getting to be a real convention.

Dorothy, darling, please understand, I've just got the heebie-jeebies.

I think I'll go to Europe for six months or a year.

Why not? I haven't got a melody in my head.

They're playing that one too fast. If you'll excuse me, I'll go talk to them.

It's been a long year, hasn't it, Dorothy?

And at the end of it, he's no better than at the beginning.

He's in love.

What kind of in love is it when it's so hopeless?

It's a crazy kind of love, but it doesn't make it any the less painful...

...or any the less difficult...

...or any the less disappointing.

It's no use.

He's made up his mind.

He's leaving for Europe right after the opening night of Artists and Models.

Have you got the tickets for Cumberly?

Sorry, nothing for Cumberly.

Well, now, maybe they're under the name of Miss Lillian Harris.

Oh, yes, here they are. Two in the fifth row center for Miss Harris.

CUMBERLY: Why, thank you.

Oh, look over there.

With the tall young man, is that Lillian Harris?

Yes, it is.

Oh, come talk to her. Come tell her.

Miss Harris, I wonder if you remember me.

Of course, you're Mr. Townsend. This is Mr. Cumberly.

Oh, how do you do, sir? This is Miss Mueller.

Mighty glad to meet you folks.

Look, it was such a mistake with the violets.

It was Townsend sent them to all the ladies in the hotel.

Yes, it was sort of a joke to get Romy back to town.

I know that, Mr. Townsend. It's all been explained.

Romy has never been the same.

He has never forgotten Saranac.

-Oh, I doubt that he even remembers it. -Remembers it?

That's all he thinks of.

Come backstage and see him.

Well, I'm with Mr. Cumberly.

MAN: Curtain going up. -Let's not miss anything.

This is the first time I ever saw a show with real live people in my whole life.

Oh, well, afterwards then.

You know, after every opening night, we always have a little party in my café.

We have a little music and wine.

Come and be with us.

Café Vienna. Second Avenue.

Thank you, Miss Mueller. I don't know if we can.

I'm going to find Romy and tell him.

Oh, no, don't.

If she comes, it will be good.

If she doesn't, it's better he shouldn't know.

Come on, Bert.

[JAZZY MUSIC PLAYING]

[SINGING] There was a time when sex appeal

Had quite the most complex appeal

Mr. Freud then employed Words we never had heard of

He kept us on a string

We kept on wondering

But the seed of sin

Now at last has been found By Elinor Glyn

In one word, she defines

The indefinable thing

She calls it "it"

Just simply "it"

That is the word they're using now

For that improper fraction Of vague attraction

That gets the action somehow

You've either got or you have not

That certain thing that makes them cling

So if the boys don't seem to fall for you

There 's just no hope at all for you

Give up and quit

You'll never hit

If you have not got it

[YELLS]

CHORUS: Yeah

Yeah

Charleston, Charleston

-Za-zoo -Whiz-bang

-Have fun -Shazz-bo

-Ho, ho -Hey, hey

-Hi, hi -Razzmatazz

Hi dee hi, ho dee ho

Hi dee hi

Vo do dee do

Go, go, go, go

Get up and go, get up and go

-Get up and go, girl -Go

You gotta go, unless you go You'll never go, girl

-If you've not -Not

-Got -Got

You'll never, never, fit If you have not got

Not got it

Alan Dale says it's as familiar as a burlesque show...

...and Percy Hammond says it has become an American institution like hot dogs.

It will buy me the biggest suite on the biggest transatlantic liner...

...and a year in the south of France, maybe on a yacht.

Rather an empty ambition, Romy. You used to have more complicated ones.

That was yesterday.

I'm no longer interested in yesterday, I'm only interested in tomorrow.

From now on, I'm only looking in front of me.

Every now and then, you should also look in back of you.

This is Mr. Cumberly, Mr. Romberg.

Mighty pleased to make your acquaintance, Mr. Romberg.

Sure nice of Miss Mueller to ask us to this shivaree.

[IN SOUTHERN ACCENT] My, what a handsome rebel.

You all from the South?

-North Carolina. -North Carolina.

Bless my soul and body.

-Winston-Salem? -Big Branch.

Big Branch? Got a thousand cousins in Big Branch.

-You don't rightly say? -Indeed I do.

Would you care to dance?

If you keep it simple and straightforward.

That morning in Saranac, l was bewildered and angry with you, Romy.

And I said a lot of things I didn't mean, and I'm sorry.

l was the original horse's neck. If you only knew how sorry I've been.

Then I'm glad we've both had a chance to apologize.

It's been on my mind.

Wasn't it lucky my running into Miss Mueller?

I mean, such a curious coincidence.

Oh, Lillian. It's all over, isn't it?

Yes.

And you still dance like Irene Castle.

Only with you.

You know something?

l was wrong just now.

-It's not over. -It has to be.

-We can't start again. ROMY: -Why not?

Because it has only one place to end.

You're absolutely right. We're not suited to each other.

We don't stand a chance. It's hopeless except for two things.

I love you and you love me.

-That's not true. -It is.

-It's not enough. -Why not?

Oh, Romy, don't start again.

When I'm with you, you're convincing and I'm upset.

But when I'm alone, I know how impossible it is.

Don't do this to me. I shouldn't even have come here.

But you did come.

Why? Why? You did come and you'll go on and -

CUMBERLY: Miss Lillian.

That lady has no more cousins in Big Branch than you have.

Now, you said 10 minutes, it's already been 15.

Yes, I'm ready. Good night, Mr. Romberg.

Good night, Miss Harris.

Good night, Mr. Cumberly.

Say hello to all your cousins in Big Bend.

Big Branch.

Of course, Big Branch, big boy.

[SINGING] Jazza jazza Doodoo

Come on, let's go. It's not yet midnight. You can read it to me by 2:00.

-Read what? -Your play, The Stupid Prince.

-Are you going to do it? -Of course. Did you ever doubt it?

We'll have a hit. A big, fat, beautiful, artistic, moneymaking hit.

-Do you know what? -Don't know what.

I don't either. There's something wrong with me.

-For instance? -For instance, I was orchestrated.

Music is going to come out of me like it never came out before.

Music that will shine like the Matterhorn on a clear day in May.

-Song Cue Department? -No song cues for our show.

With your words to say what's in my heart, and my music to say what's in yours...

...and both together to say what's in everybody else's...

...we'll write a show that will be Maytime and June time and even July time.

To us and to The Student Prince.

[SINGING] Overhead the moon is beaming

White as blossoms on the bough

Nothing is heard but the song of a bird

Filling all the air with dreaming

Could my heart but still its beating

Only you can tell it how

Beloved

From your window give me greeting

Hear my eternal vow

Soft in the trees sighs

The echo of my longing

While all around you My dreams of rapture throng

CHORUS: Visions glowing around me throng

My soul, my joy, my hope, my dear

Your heart must tell you that I am near

Lean from above while I pour out my love

For you know to my life you are love

-Oh, hear my longing cry -Hear me

-Oh, love me -Love

-Or I die -Me

Love me

Overhead the moon is beaming

White as blossoms on the bough

Nothing is heard but the song of a bird

Filling all the air with dreaming

Could my heart but still its beating

Only you

Can tell it how

Beloved

From your window give me greeting

I swear all my love

My love

-Good night, Mr. Romberg. -Good night.

Good night.

Good night and thank you.

You said I'd come, and l have.

But where could I go that I wouldn't hear your music and see your face?

I don't think anywhere anymore.

Men and women and boys and girls...

...in New York and Iceland and Arabia, too, I guess...

...will be singing and playing what came out of the depth of you.

And I'm so proud I could bust.

It's ours together. Out of us it came.

No, no, you alone.

Out of what I didn't see and didn't understand.

What in the name of heaven you want me for I don't know.

I've no talent, no music or poetry in me.

None. Only the look of you and the spirit of you and your hand in mine.

LILLIAN: And now I was where I wanted to be.

Where I'd wanted to be from the very first split second I'd seen him.

That is, after he shaved.

And so we were married.

Ever since I was a little girl, I'd been sentimental about weddings.

I'd planned all the clichés, orange blossoms and something borrowed...

...and masses of white roses.

But this isn't our wedding.

This is the spectacular second-act finale of Louis the 14th.

After the matinée, we dashed to the city hall...

...in Paterson, New Jersey, and the mayor married us.

I found I didn't mind at all.

I liked it.

Romantic little cottage for a honeymoon, isn't it?

But it isn't ours.

It's the set for the love scene of my husband's next show, Princess Flavia.

Oh, how contrite and chagrined Romy was.

It was difficult to make him believe I didn't mind.

He swore we'd go around the world. Asia, Europe, North Africa.

North Africa, with its minarets and palms and dunes.

North Africa, with its strange exotic rhythms.

Well, I saw them, all right...

...but they were the minarets, the palms and dunes...

...and the strange exotic rhythms...

...of my husband's newest show, The Desert Song...

...that he wrote with Oscar Hammerstein and Otto Harbach.

[RINGS]

[SINGING] One alone to be my own

I alone to know

His caresses

One to be eternally

The one my worshiping soul

Possesses

At his call I'd give my all

All my life

And all my love

Enduring

This would be

A magic world to me

If he were mine

Alone

LILLIAN: Romy thrived on the excitement that goes with having a smash hit.

And in his own special eloquence, he communicated that excitement to me.

And I was as much a part of show business as he was.

Loving him and loving it.

And I came to look forward to the opening nights.

Particularly of the show he was writing with our wonderful friend Dorothy Donnelly...

...My Maryland.

[SINGING] Connecticut boys came out in '61

And took a gun each one

If we are a thousand strong or only 10

We'll fight them all the harder then

And when at the end We'll say each mother's son

"The war is done and won"

The men from the North Will greet the Southern men

While bugles blow, we're friends again

Your land and my land

Will be our land one day

Bright bars and white stars

Leading both on our way

Our one flag forever

When war and hatred have gone

So

Glory, glory, hallelujah

We'll sing as we go marching on

CHORUS: Glory, glory, hallelujah

Glory, glory, hallelujah Glory, hallelujah

Your land and my land

Will be our land one day

Bright bars and white stars

Leading both on our way

Our one flag forever

When war and hatred have gone so

Glory, glory, hallelujah

We'll sing as we go marching

On

LILLIAN: Dorothy wasn't at the theater to hear the applause...

...of the opening-night audience.

It was a question, a grave question...

...whether she'd ever see an opening night again.

So Anna and I stayed with her and waited for Romy to come...

...and tell us all about the curtain calls and read the early notices.

ROMY: Yoo-hoo, here I come.

What's the verdict?

Only two notices so far, but they are both great.

Good.

The Times says it has a real American feeling.

The Tribune loved the book but hardly mentions the score.

I bet.

Well, so much for My Maryland. Now, let's talk about the next one.

Dorothy, I have an idea for a show with a modern Viennese background.

It's all about Freud and psychoanalysis...

...and people who fall in love with each other's husbands.

-Right down my alley. -Great.

We'll all hop on board the Aquitania, we'll write it in the south of France.

-I'll take care of the tickets first thing. -That's right, Romy.

We'll all go to the south of France. But just in case -

No "in cases."

l wouldn't listen to an "in case."

Better listen, darlings. I'd like to be as close to the Astor as possible...

...even if it means Brooklyn.

Any time you're driving over the bridge for a tryout...

...just sound your Klaxon.

I'll hear.

Oh, Old Ironsides is trying to get rid of you.

Better go or she'll hit you on the head with a baseball bat.

Oh, no. No.

Don't go yet.

Romy, didn't you once write a song called "Auf Wiedersehen"?

See if the piano's in tune.

Never mind "Auf Wiedersehen," Dorothy.

Let me tell you about the new show. As the curtain rises...

...we find the hero of the piece having dinner with a group of his best friends.

Now, for this scene, we need the sort of bright, breezy song...

...that will get the show off to a flying start.

Anna, please.

[SINGING] Love lives ever

Knowing no word like

Goodbye

Hearts may sever

True love can never die

Calm all your fears

And dry all your tears

Love will remain

When all else shall wane

Guiding you on through the years

Auf Wiedersehen

Auf Wiedersehen

LILLIAN: In a matter of weeks, she was gone.

It was not easy for Romy to take.

Dorothy had meant the world to him.

We grieved, but I made him go to work.

Thank the Lord for that understanding man, Oscar Hammerstein.

They worked together on a show.

It was called New Moon.

[SINGING] The sky was blue

And high above

The moon was new

And so was love

This eager heart of mine was singing

Lover, where can you be?

You came at last

Love had its day

That day is past

You've gone away

This aching heart of mine is singing

Lover, come back to me

I remember every little thing You used to do

I'm so lonely

Every road I walk along

I've walked along with you

No wonder

I am lonely

The sky is blue

The night is cold

The moon is new

But love is old

And while I'm waiting

Here

This heart of mine

Is singing

Lover, come back

To me

I'm so lonely

No wonder I am lonely

The sky is blue

The night is cold

The moon is new

But love is old

And while I'm waiting here

This heart of mine is singing

-And while I'm waiting here -And while I'm waiting here

-This heart of mine is singing -This heart of mine is singing

-Lover, come back -Lover, come back

-To me -To me

LILLIAN: New Moon was a smash hit...

...and people acclaimed the new team of Hammerstein and Romberg.

Oscar and Romy went on working together.

But outside of New Moon and Desert Song...

...what Romy wrote didn't catch on.

First, there was East Wind.

And then May Wine.

Romy was disappointed, bitterly disappointed...

...never discouraged.

There was always that exciting chance that the next one would be it.

The next one was Sunny River, and our hopes were high.

As usual, there was that agonizing excitement of the New York opening.

And also, as usual...

...there was Anna's party after the opening, at Café Vienna.

[BEBOP MUSIC PLAYS ON JUKEBOX]

A jukebox in the Café Vienna, Anna, this is treason.

Oh, Romy.

Good evening, gentlemen. I see you have a little competition.

Anna is very up-to-date.

We even serve chop suey.

Well, Anna, this is very groovy. Shall we cut a rug?

Groovy. Such noise. They call it bebop.

Listen, they're playing "Softly, as in a Morning Sunrise."

They play it all the time. So many nickels.

Harms says it will sell a million records.

Such a beautiful song, Romy.

Only when you sing it. You don't massacre the melody.

Would you excuse me?

-Aren't you Sigmund Romberg? -Yes, I am.

-My name's Berrison. You knew my father. -I did.

May I present Mrs. Romberg, Mr. Berrison, Miss Mueller.

-How do you do? -This is Miss Arabella Bell.

-Hello. -How do you do?

-Won't you join us? -Come along.

-It's for Romy's opening night. -Please.

Arabella, Mr. Romberg wrote that song you like so much.

"Softly"? Gee, that's slurpee.

You know, Mr. Berrison, in a way, your father discovered me.

That's what he always said, but I felt he was exaggerating to impress me.

No, it was quite true.

We saw your show tonight and we loved it, didn't we?

-Fractured me. -Did it really, Miss Bell?

Oh, yes, I liked it.

It's just that -

Well, we had peachy seats, 10th row center.

It's just - Well, I've never been to an opera before.

Opera?

Sunny River is not an opera, Miss Bell.

Well, you know what I mean, like Johann Strauss and Victor Herbert.

It's sort of slow like opera.

We'd better join our party.

Listen, I didn't mean to say anything wrong, Mr. Romberg.

"Softly, As In a Morning Sunrise" sends me. But I just don't dig opera.

I just don't dig Miss Bell.

Slurpee.

Miss Bell is a symptom. You mustn't - Oh, here comes Townsend with the notices.

Well, Bert, did we did it?

Well, not exactly, Romy.

Lillian.

Anna.

Well, I don't know what the others say but I bet mine is the worst.

Well, I'm afraid they're all alike.

Oh, it isn't fair, Romy. It was a wonderful show.

Seven men have no right to decide.

So they decide. So I have a turkey.

I've had them before and I'll have them again.

Also, I will have some more smashes.

Come on, everybody. Let's drink a little wine and eat a little food.

The world isn't over. There's always tomorrow.

Thank heaven for tomorrow.

Thank heaven for Arabella.

Yes, Arabella. She compared you to Victor Herbert and Johann Strauss...

...and that's as true as anything I've ever heard.

When does a man cease just to be a songwriter and become a composer?

When does a man cease just to write hit songs...

...and become part of the music of a nation?

That's what's happened to you, Romy. You graduated from Tin Pan Alley.

Oh, Lillian, how right you are.

Thank you for that, Lillian, that was a wife speaking, a true wife.

I spoke not as a wife but as a critic.

I've made up my mind. I wanna see you in Carnegie Hall.

I wanna hear your music at its peak, and I want a symphony orchestra to play it.

That's out of the question. My stuff was not meant for Carnegie Hall.

It was meant for singing, dancing and making love.

It doesn't belong on the concert stage.

Perhaps it doesn't belong anywhere anymore.

Carnegie Hall is exactly where it belongs.

And you know who should conduct it? You.

Of course he should. Oh, Romy, you've got to do it.

Now, look, waving a stick at a theater orchestra, yes.

Leading a band in a restaurant, also yes.

But conducting a symphony orchestra in Carnegie Hall?

That's like asking a high school kid to fight the champ.

But you are the champ.

Look, this argument isn't an argument that you can settle with words.

This argument can only be settled with music.

And I will show you how.

Romy, what I'm about to play, I didn't write.

You wrote.

And not even for a woman, for a man.

And not for one man, for a hundred men.

And yet, I can sing it as everybody can sing every song you write.

So now you take your own advice.

[SINGING] You who have dreams

If you act

They will come true

To turn your dreams

To a fact, it's up to you

If you have the soul and the spirit

Never fear it

You'll see it through

Hearts can inspire

Other hearts with their fire

For the strong obey

When a strong man shows them

The way

Give me some men Who are stouthearted men

Who will fight for the right they adore

Start me with 10 Who are stouthearted men

And I'll soon give you 10,000 more

Oh, shoulder to shoulder And bolder and bolder

They grow as they go to the fore

Then there's nothing in this world

Can halt or mar the plan

When stouthearted men

Can stick together

Man

To man

Ladies and gentlemen, when Anna Mueller sings...

...it is not alone with the voice of technical perfection...

...it is also with a voice that loves human beings...

...and praises God.

She is my old, my dear, my trusted friend.

And all my life, I am grateful that I am privileged to know her.

For Anna and me, it is a long time together.

But tonight, it seems like one golden day.

Just a minute, ladies and gentlemen.

Like my friend Al Jolson once said, "Nothing you ain't heard yet."

[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]

You know, tonight I learned something about conducting a symphony orchestra.

Only three things are important.

First, you must give the musicians a downbeat.

So.

Second, you must not disturb the musicians while they are playing.

And third, you must be very careful to stop conducting...

...at precisely the same instant that they stop playing...

...so that everything comes out nice and even.

With Bruno Walter, it is easy.

With Toscanini, it is a joy.

With me, it is a miracle.

[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]

Tonight, who should I kid?

Tomorrow, one critic will say that I am corny.

Another critic will say that I am schmaltzy.

The jitterbugs will say that I am highbrow, the Wagnerians will say that I am lowbrow.

Highbrow, lowbrow.

What I really am is a middlebrow.

What has come out of my head and my fingers is mostly, I think, music...

...to make people love each other.

To make them dream of the way it was.

And to make them hope for the way it will be.

So shall we have some more love and dreams and hopes?

This is the wonderful thing about music.

It is never quite new and never quite the same.

And just when you love it best, you think that you have heard it before.

And who knows, maybe you have deep in your heart.

But here is a new one.

At least I think so.

You boys won't find parts for this on your stands...

...so when you think you've got it, just join in.

Do you know something else?

I have never dedicated a song before, but tonight, I feel like it.

So this song is for my wife and of my wife and to my wife.

Every word and every note is written in her image.

And that is why we call it:

[SINGING] When I grow too old to dream

I'll have you to remember

When I grow too old to dream

Your love will live in my heart

So kiss me, my sweet

And so let us part

And when I grow too old

To dream

That kiss will live

In my heart

CHORUS: So kiss me, my sweet

And so let us part

And when I grow too old

To dream

Your love will live

In my heart