All language subtitles for Bewitched.S06E07.To.Trick.or.Treat.or.Not.to.Trick.or.Treat.Imprint.1080p.BluRay.FLAC2.0.H.264-BTN_track5_[eng]

Mommy,
it's beautiful.

I'll be the most beautiful
princess on the whole block.

Well, I certainly
hope so.

Every other child
on the block's a boy.

Am I going to
have a crown?

Yes, as soon as Daddy's shirts
come back from the laundry.

Daddy's shirts?

Yes. I need the
cardboard out of them

to make your crown.
Oh.

Then I'm gonna get
some sparkle paint,

and I'll put lots of
jewels and things on it.

Boo!
Oh!

Oh, my goodness!

Did I scare you?

Yeah. A witch that looked
like that would scare anybody.

Would I get more treats if I go
trick-or-treating as an ugly old witch?

Probably. But you and I know that
witches don't look like that.

They're just the same
as everybody else.

Almost.

I don't know why we just don't
tell everyone we're witches.

Then they'll find out what
wonderful, nice people we are.

Well, I'm afraid that's
out of the question.

People don't really think there
are such things as witches.

So we'll just have to keep
our little secret, okay?

Okay.

Mommy, can I wear this crown
instead of the cardboard one?

Mother.

What makes you
think I did that?

It could've been
something she ate.

Just send it back
where it came from.

I don't see why
a granddaughter of mine

should have to wear a crown made of
shirt cardboard and sparkle paint.

Don't you worry,
sweetheart.

You're gonna have
a beautiful crown.

Samantha?

Samantha, what's
the meaning of all this?

Mother, you know perfectly well
that those are Halloween costumes.

Perfectly harmless
and unrealistic.

And discriminatory
against a minority group.

You of all people.

Tabitha, why don't you
run upstairs and play?

I think maybe Grandmamma would
like to have a little talk.

Samantha, will you please explain
the meaning of these dunce caps?

And these hideous masks?

Well, Mother, it's all
for a good cause.

I'm helping out on the
Trick-or-Treat for UNICEF Committee,

and I was just making some of the
costumes for the neighborhood kids.

That's a tawdry excuse.

I know very well
who's behind this.

It's Durwood.
He's brainwashed you.

Easy, Mother.
Darrin will hear you.

[Darrin] I heard
her. I heard her.

There's more,
there's more.

I absolutely refuse
to let my daughter

participate in this
barbaric mortal holiday

that has maligned
our image for centuries.

Mother, may I remind you that I am
perfectly free to do whatever I wish.

Just as long as
whatever you wish

is whatever he
wishes you to do.

That is not true.

Mother, it's really
very simple.

I agreed to live
in this mortal world.

And as long as Halloween
is part of that world...

I know, I know,
I know.

You took your vows
for better and for worse.

And you certainly
are getting the worst.

Now, just
a minute, Endora.

Darrin, you must realize that
Mother tends to get a little upset

this time of the year.
Upset? Upset?

I'm not upset,
I'm incensed.

To think that
you, Samantha,

would participate
in depicting your own kind

as toothless old hags
with scraggly eyebrows

and stringy hair
and an evil cackle.

Now, don't forget the wart on
the end of a long, crooked nose

that she keeps sticking into
everybody else's business.

Samantha,
I will not stand here

and be insulted by
something that's 90% water.

Oh, now...
Oh, yeah?

Well, how about something
that's 100% hot air?

Will you please
tell what's-his-name

he's finally
pushed me too far?

She says you finally
pushed... Samantha,

will you please
tell Madame Defarge

that you happen
to be my wife,

and that Tabitha happens
to be my daughter,

and if we choose to celebrate
Halloween tomorrow night

and every other
night of the week,

it's our business and she
has nothing to say about it.

You noticed she had
nothing to say.

[Endora] Toothless old hags,
are we?

With warts and scraggly
eyebrows and stringy hair.

Good morning, Darrin.

Uh, good morning.

Bartenbach's
on his way up.

So let's give him the glad
hand and the big smile.

What's the matter
with you?

Nothing. Nothing.

Darrin, there's no
reason for you to be glum.

I've gone over this presentation
from cover to cover,

and I want to tell you
it's beautiful.

Thank you very much, Larry.
Glad you liked it.

I'm sure Bartenbach
likes it as much as I do.

Good, good.

Darrin, are you
all right?

No.

Trouble at home?

No, no. It's just...

I have this toothache.

Yes?

Mr. Bartenbach is here.

Send him in,
send him in.

I'm sorry about the tooth, but you
know how important this account is,

so it's mind over matter.
Okay, old boy?

Now, let's give him
a big smile.

Mr. Bartenbach,
come in, come in.

Morning, Tate.
Stephens.

Good morning,
good morning.

Good to see you again,
Mr. Bartenbach.

I don't know what you
two have to smile about.

It can't have anything to
do with this presentation.

It's a bummer.

That's exactly the word that I
was passing along to Stephens here

when you came in,
Mr. Bartenbach.

A bummer.
But, Larry, you said...

Don't argue, Stephens,
Mr. Bartenbach knows what he wants.

[Bartenbach] I certainly do.

Suppose you tell us
what that is?

Well, I don't pay McMann
& Tate to pick my brain.

Of course not. I just
thought we might expedite.

Okay, Stephens, let's give Mr. Bartenbach
the alternate presentation.

Right. I'll go home and
start work on those right now.

Uh, just tell Mr. Bartenbach
what you have.

Well, somebody around here
better start working on them,

or I'm taking my
business elsewhere.

I'm sure that won't be
necessary, Mr. Bartenbach.

McMann & Tate will come through
for you. You just leave it to us.

Betty, I'm going to work
at home the rest of the day.

Yes, sir.

I think I need
a coffee break.

[Endora] You didn't think I'd forget
the wart and the long crooked nose

she sticks in
everybody's business?

Hello, officer, I guess
this isn't my lucky day.

I don't suppose you
get lucky very often.

I think I know
what you're going to ask.

I'm not going to ask you for a
chorus of Tiptoe Through the Tulips.

Cute.

Now, I got nothing against
you guys wearing your hair long,

but you could at least
comb your eyebrows.

I don't blame you for what
you're probably thinking, but...

I don't think anything
anymore, buddy.

I just stand around here
and hand these out.

Anyway, you guys got
something going for you.

You don't have to
dress up for Halloween.

Sign here.

Whatever turns
you on, fella.

Well, Samantha.

I see you're
still determined

to perform this
treacherous folly.

Mother, don't
overdramatize.

Durwood has to
learn a lesson,

and he's fortunate to
have me to teach it to him.

What have you done?

Your mother always does unto
others what they do unto her.

Why don't you get back to your
little Halloween celebration,

and I'll get
back to mine.

Mother.

Don't you go
too far.

Sam!

Boy, did you go too far.

Your mother
has gone too far.

Funny,

I was
just saying that.

Where is she?

I'd like to speak to her.

Why, Durwood,
I didn't know you cared.

Endora, I want you
to know that this time

I am fully aware
I am responsible

for your irascible behavior.

And, Endora,
I do owe you an apology.

For years, mortals
have projected witches

in this image.

I should have
known better.

Well, I...

I must say...

I don't know
what to say.

You don't have to say
anything. Just do it.

Oh, yes. Yes, of course.

On the other hand,

it was wholly
within my province

to remind you that you have
no business sticking your nose

into the affairs
of my family.

It's a matter of integrity.
He had a point to make.

Well, he didn't have
to make it with my nose.

Oh, Mother, no.

I fully expected that.

Now, if you'll
both excuse me,

I have some
important work to do.

Samantha, you're married to the
most stubborn, the most obstinate...

Mother, now,
please be reasonable.

After all,
Darrin did apologize.

That's an apology?

Well, all right.

If you get Darrin
back to normal,

I will not go
trick-or-treating with Tabitha.

Is that a promise?
Promise.

And you won't give in
to any undue influence

that Durwood
might exert upon you?

Mother, Darrin isn't the one that
exerts undue influence around here.

Very well, Samantha.

I want you to know you've
made your mother very happy.

Ohh. Well, now you
make me very happy.

You just get Darrin
back to normal.

My dear, for Durwood
that is normal.

Mother,
get with it.

Well, I like you
much better with a haircut.

Where's Endora?
I think the least I can do

is congratulate her for
admitting when she's wrong.

Oh. Well, she left.
You know Mother.

She couldn't stand your
getting sentimental over her.

Oh! Hey, look.

Cute, huh?

Heaven.

Oh. Sorry.

Good morning,
Mr. Stephens.

Good morning, Betty.
Mr. Tate in yet?

He certainly is.
He's in your office.

Oh!

Good morning, Larry.

I suppose you're anxious about
the Bartenbach presentations, hmm?

Right.

Well, all our
worries are over.

I worked the rest of
yesterday afternoon

and most of last night
on a new campaign.

Marvelous.

Bartenbach is
going to love it.

I doubt it.

For your information,
Bartenbach's wife

is the local chairwoman of the
Trick-or-Treat for UNICEF Committee.

She is?
Well, that's great.

Samantha happens to be doing a
lot of work for that committee.

Sam was doing a great deal
of work for that committee.

She just quit.

Bartenbach called me
to tell me about it.

And he didn't
sound pleased.

Well, now,
wait a minute, Larry.

I have to admit,
Darrin, I'm surprised.

To think that Sam would turn her
back on a great cause like this.

All those hungry
little kids.

Well, I'm sure Samantha
had a good reason.

And I think I know
what it is.

Never mind a reason,
what about our client?

We stand to lose one of the
biggest accounts we've ever had.

Now, just
a minute, Larry.

All right. I'm sure Sam has a
good reason for what she did.

I would suggest you find out what
it is and do something about it.

How was I supposed to know that Mr. Bartenbach's
wife was the head of the committee?

Sam, you know it doesn't
matter to me about Bartenbach.

I'm not worried
about losing a client.

I'm only concerned
that you understand

you cannot fight
my battles for me.

But... Especially my
battles with your mother.

It doesn't matter
what Endora does to me.

It does to me.

And I think,
in the case of Halloween,

Mother's point of view
should be respected.

You, Tabitha and I
are going trick-or-treating.

Millions of hungry children are more
important than one stubborn witch.

Oh, boy.

Now, Mother...

Never mind, Samantha.
Dobbin is absolutely right.

Millions of hungry children
are more important.

And I am
a stubborn witch.

All right, Samantha,

I'm ready to go
trick-or-treating.

[Samantha] Come on.
Here we go. That's it.

Hi, Tabitha, I bet you
don't know who I am.

Yes, I do, Tommy,
you're Batman.

[Bobby making ghostly sounds] Tabitha!

Tabitha, did I
scare you?

Don't be silly, Bobby. I
know you're not really a ghost.

Come on, Mommy,
let's try the next house.

No, sweetheart, I think we ought to
wait till your father catches up.

Tabitha, did you see
what I saw?

What? What?

There's a real witch
down the street.

Oh!

Now I know what's keeping
your father so long.

Trick or treat.

Oh, hello! Here's something
for you and something for you.

One for you,
and there's one for you.

And one for you,
and who's your big friend?

Better watch out.
It's a real witch.

Happy Halloween.

Oh! Uh, yes.

Now wait a minute, and I'll get
the money for UNICEF, okay?

Now let's fill all the boxes
up with the money, huh?

There's one for you
and one for you.

Give me one.

And one for
the big bad witch.

The big bad witch
thanks you.

Come on, kids.

Bye-bye. Have fun.

Golly. I wish we had
a real witch

to go trick-or-treating
with us every Halloween.

That's no witch.
That's my daddy. Huh?

Did you make that
costume, too, Mrs. Stephens?

No. No, Tabitha's
grandmother made this one.

How are you holding up,
sweetheart?

I've never had it
so bad.

But UNICEF has
never had it so good.

Well, Mr. and Mrs. Stephens,

your group has collected more than any
individual group from this neighborhood

in the history
of UNICEF.

Good. Well, thank you,
Mrs. Townsend.

It must be
the authentic costume.

That did it.
That did it.

Tabitha, come on,
let's get some cookies.

Excuse me, Michael.
Here we go.

Mr. Stephens, you're the
talk of the neighborhood.

I can't get over
how real your costume is.

I mean, it looks like if I pulled
your hair, it would really hurt.

Oh, it would,
it would.

Mother stuck it on
with glue.

And that outfit's
giving me an idea.

Imagine a picture of an
ugly old crone of a witch

and underneath it
the caption,

"Don't look like a witch.

"Use Bartenbach
dental cream,

"hair tonic, skin
lotion, wart remover."

Harold,
I love it.

Well, Stephens,
tell me how you love it.

Mr. Bartenbach, I'm not
sure that you'd want...

I'm sure, Stephens, and
we'll get things underway

first thing in the morning
at your office.

Well, I don't think I'll be
coming in to the office tomorrow.

I've had a rather, uh,
strenuous evening.

Right. I'll pick up Tate,
and we'll meet at your home.

You do look tired.

Poopsie, I've come up
with another great idea.

And we owe it all
to Mother.

"Mr. Darrin Stephens, trick-or-treating
in an authentic witch costume,

"proclaimed neighborhood
Father of the Month

"as his group collects
record amount for UNICEF."

I just wish I could

Take off my authentic
costume between Halloweens.

Have you been trying
to get your mother?

All morning.

Mother, you have to do
something about Darrin.

"I could change him
into a pumpkin.

"Love, Mummy."

Halloween is over, Mummy.
Can't you forget it?

No.

Mother, you don't
realize what you're doing.

I know very well
what I'm doing,

and I intend to go
right on doing it.

Do you realize that you have given
the witch's image that we hate

more publicity than it's had
since the Salem trials?

Samantha, if you think you're going
to make me back down that easily...

That's probably Larry.

Darrin,
wait a minute.

Haven't you always said that
you like to base your campaigns

on positive rather
than negative concepts?

Yes.
Well, then.

How about Glinda,
the Good Witch of the North?

Who?

Glinda, the Good
Witch of the North.

Of course.

You're the best witch
a man ever had.

Mother?

Samantha,
you win.

I'm bored with
all this trivia.

Good.

Hi, Larry,
Mr. Bartenbach.

Stephens.
Mmm-hmm.

Darrin?
Mmm?

Didn't I just see
Robin Hood?

Well, if you did, you haven't
been taking your liver pills.

Well, come on in,
gentlemen.

I've been thinking about
Mr. Bartenbach's campaign,

and I decided we should get
away from the stereotyped witch.

I mean, well, who's to say that witches
really look like I did last night?

Who's to say
they don't?

Everyone knows witches have hooked
noses, warts and blacked-out teeth.

Frankly, Mr. Bartenbach, you don't
know what you're talking about.

Look, fella, I don't
like being insulted.

Neither do witches.

Well, I mean...
They've got feelings, too.

This witch thing's
got him freaked out.

You're afraid of
offending a witch?

Now hear me out.

The old-fashioned witch
image is okay for kids,

but kids don't do
the buying.

We should use as an image
a beautiful witch like...

Well, like Glinda.

Who?
Who?

Glinda, the Good
Witch of the North.

Good Witch
of the North.

And he doesn't want
to offend her.

Gentlemen, may I present
the alternate concept,

Glinda, the Good
Witch of the North.

Hi, Sam.
Hi, Larry.

Mr. Bartenbach.
Hi, Mrs. Stephens.

Sam kindly offered
to demonstrate.

Darrin, who made you
an authority on witches?

It's instinct.

Mr. Bartenbach, wouldn't
you prefer your product

to be associated
with this image?

Mr. Bartenbach's already
made up his mind, Darrin.

The caption reads,

"To look like Glinda,
the Good Witch of the North,

"use Bartenbach products."

Darrin, you've got
to be crazy.

I like it.

Crazy to come up with such
a fantastically good idea.

I don't know where
you get your instincts,

but I hope
you never lose them.

Me too.