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1
00:00:06,632 --> 00:00:08,091
Sam, I'm exhausted.
2
00:00:08,132 --> 00:00:10,510
Turn out the lights
and come to bed.
3
00:00:10,552 --> 00:00:12,513
Right this minute,
sweetheart.
4
00:00:12,554 --> 00:00:14,014
As soon as
I open the window
5
00:00:14,056 --> 00:00:16,225
for some fresh air.
6
00:00:24,274 --> 00:00:26,568
Sweetheart, come here and look.
7
00:00:27,402 --> 00:00:28,695
Come here and look at what?
8
00:00:28,737 --> 00:00:30,989
Mrs. Kravitz is outside
in her nightclothes
9
00:00:30,989 --> 00:00:32,241
trying to hitchhike.
10
00:00:32,241 --> 00:00:34,868
Mm-hm. Come to bed.
11
00:00:34,909 --> 00:00:37,037
Doesn't that strike you
as unusual?
12
00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:38,497
Not for Mrs. Kravitz.
13
00:00:38,539 --> 00:00:40,874
Besides, you shouldn't
get involved.
14
00:00:40,915 --> 00:00:43,210
Oh, sweetheart, please.
15
00:00:43,210 --> 00:00:45,170
Look at her waiting out there.
16
00:00:45,212 --> 00:00:46,922
She looks so forlorn.
17
00:00:58,642 --> 00:01:00,561
Sweetheart,
she's our neighbor.
18
00:01:00,602 --> 00:01:02,563
The least we can do
is find out
19
00:01:02,604 --> 00:01:05,023
what her problem is. Isn't it?
20
00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:06,566
No.
21
00:01:06,608 --> 00:01:07,401
Why not?
22
00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:08,694
I've learned
from experience,
23
00:01:08,735 --> 00:01:10,571
when you set out to do
the least you can do,
24
00:01:10,612 --> 00:01:12,990
you wind up doing
the most you can do.
25
00:01:13,031 --> 00:01:15,075
You want to give me that
once more?
26
00:01:15,117 --> 00:01:16,577
And try it
in English.
27
00:01:16,618 --> 00:01:19,580
In two words:
butt out.
28
00:01:19,621 --> 00:01:22,666
Sweetheart,
you're a cruel heart.
29
00:01:24,876 --> 00:01:26,003
Wait...
30
00:01:44,896 --> 00:01:47,357
Yoo-hoo. Mrs. Kravitz?
31
00:01:55,157 --> 00:01:57,701
Um, Mrs. Kravitz.
32
00:01:57,743 --> 00:02:00,412
I don't mean to be
a busybody, but uh,
33
00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:02,205
what are
you doing?
34
00:02:02,247 --> 00:02:05,417
I'm doing something
I've always wanted to do.
35
00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:08,419
I'm deserting
my husband.
36
00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:11,089
Just like that? In the
middle of the night?
37
00:02:11,089 --> 00:02:12,341
Mm-hm. Yup.
38
00:02:12,382 --> 00:02:15,010
After 22 years of marriage,
I've had it.
39
00:02:15,052 --> 00:02:16,303
Where are
you going?
40
00:02:16,345 --> 00:02:18,096
Tonight,
to a hotel.
41
00:02:18,138 --> 00:02:19,473
Tomorrow,
to Mexico,
42
00:02:19,514 --> 00:02:22,559
for a
quickie divorce.
43
00:02:22,559 --> 00:02:24,519
I wanted
to phone for a taxi,
44
00:02:24,561 --> 00:02:27,022
but Abner
wouldn't let me.
45
00:02:27,064 --> 00:02:28,649
Because
he loves you
46
00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:30,275
and needs you.
47
00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:32,861
Because
it's a toll call.
48
00:02:32,903 --> 00:02:34,905
Sam, come on inside.
49
00:02:34,946 --> 00:02:36,782
You'll catch pneumonia.
50
00:02:36,823 --> 00:02:39,326
Um, Mrs. Kravitz,
wouldn't it be simpler
51
00:02:39,368 --> 00:02:40,869
if you
spent the night
52
00:02:40,911 --> 00:02:42,704
in our guest room?
53
00:02:42,746 --> 00:02:44,706
Gee, I don't know.
54
00:02:44,748 --> 00:02:48,710
Strange things seem
to happen over there.
55
00:02:48,752 --> 00:02:51,380
Well, you can
always look at it
56
00:02:51,380 --> 00:02:53,507
as "any port
in a storm."
57
00:02:54,216 --> 00:02:56,802
Yeah,
that's true.
58
00:02:56,843 --> 00:02:58,720
Okay.
Thanks.
59
00:03:04,685 --> 00:03:05,852
Sweetheart.
60
00:03:05,894 --> 00:03:08,647
Mrs. Kravitz is going
to spend the night with us.
61
00:03:08,689 --> 00:03:10,899
Wonderful.
62
00:04:09,124 --> 00:04:10,292
More coffee,
sweetheart?
63
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:12,043
Thank you,
honey.
64
00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:14,087
Is Grandma Endora coming?
65
00:04:14,129 --> 00:04:15,756
Not that
I know of.
66
00:04:15,797 --> 00:04:18,300
Our company
is our neighbor,
67
00:04:18,300 --> 00:04:19,760
Mrs. Kravitz.
68
00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:22,387
How long is she going
to be our company?
69
00:04:22,428 --> 00:04:24,431
Until after breakfast.
70
00:04:24,473 --> 00:04:26,725
Just until after breakfast.
71
00:04:29,478 --> 00:04:31,354
Good morning.
72
00:04:33,815 --> 00:04:36,943
Oh, uh, good morning,
Mrs. Kravitz.
73
00:04:36,985 --> 00:04:39,237
Hello, Mrs. Kravitz.
74
00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:41,990
Good morning, sweetheart.
75
00:04:42,032 --> 00:04:46,452
Mrs. Kravitz, did you lie awake
all night, tossing and turning?
76
00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:49,122
I should say not.
I slept like a top.
77
00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:53,919
Not listening to Abner snore
was a refreshing change of pace.
78
00:04:58,380 --> 00:04:59,549
Orange juice?
79
00:04:59,591 --> 00:05:01,635
Yes, don't you like it?
80
00:05:01,676 --> 00:05:06,848
Well, I... generally start with
a tall glass of wheat germ oil.
81
00:05:07,682 --> 00:05:09,601
Sorry, we don't carry it.
82
00:05:09,642 --> 00:05:13,230
Proper nutrition
is the key to vitality.
83
00:05:13,230 --> 00:05:14,481
Of course.
84
00:05:14,523 --> 00:05:17,484
The human body can take
just so much abuse.
85
00:05:17,526 --> 00:05:19,653
Each of us owes it to his system
86
00:05:19,694 --> 00:05:22,238
to nourish it
as nature intended.
87
00:05:22,279 --> 00:05:25,826
I've told that to Abner every
morning of our married life.
88
00:05:25,867 --> 00:05:30,705
I say, "Abner, you're not trying
to maintain a garbage dump.
89
00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:33,750
You are trying to maintain
a human body."
90
00:05:33,791 --> 00:05:35,877
I say, "One of these days,"
91
00:05:35,919 --> 00:05:39,464
"that body will strike
back at you."
92
00:05:39,505 --> 00:05:41,466
And do you know what he does?
93
00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:42,801
What does he do?
94
00:05:42,801 --> 00:05:47,138
He hides behind his newspaper
as if I was a nag.
95
00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:49,558
Well, time to go to work.
96
00:05:50,475 --> 00:05:51,810
Bye, honey.
97
00:05:51,810 --> 00:05:53,270
Goodbye,
little honey.
98
00:05:53,311 --> 00:05:55,522
Goodbye,
Daddy.
99
00:05:57,232 --> 00:05:59,317
Goodbye, Mrs. Kravitz.
100
00:05:59,359 --> 00:06:01,069
Have
a nice flight.
101
00:06:01,111 --> 00:06:02,487
Thank you.
102
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:04,573
Excuse me.
103
00:06:07,409 --> 00:06:09,119
Darrin... Darrin!
104
00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:11,496
Sam, I know I didn't
finish my breakfast,
105
00:06:11,538 --> 00:06:13,081
but I just had
to get outta there.
106
00:06:13,123 --> 00:06:14,833
Well, you could have thought
of a better exit line than,
107
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:17,210
"Goodbye, Mrs. Kravitz,
have a nice flight."
108
00:06:17,252 --> 00:06:18,670
What's wrong
with that?
109
00:06:18,670 --> 00:06:20,380
That's inviting
her to leave.
110
00:06:20,422 --> 00:06:22,424
That's just
what I had in mind!
111
00:06:22,464 --> 00:06:24,301
Do you want her
to leave her husband?
112
00:06:24,342 --> 00:06:26,011
I want her
to leave our house.
113
00:06:26,052 --> 00:06:28,722
If she wants to leave her
husband, that's her business.
114
00:06:28,763 --> 00:06:30,932
But she doesn't want
to leave her husband.
115
00:06:30,974 --> 00:06:33,935
I'll bet that deep down,
they're very much in love.
116
00:06:33,976 --> 00:06:35,228
It's merely a matter
117
00:06:35,270 --> 00:06:36,646
of bringing them
to their senses.
118
00:06:36,688 --> 00:06:38,064
Fine, you do that.
119
00:06:38,106 --> 00:06:41,985
All I ask is that you do it
before I get home tonight.
120
00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:53,163
Hello, Abner?
121
00:06:53,204 --> 00:06:55,081
This is Gladys.
122
00:06:55,123 --> 00:06:56,750
Gladys Kravitz!
123
00:06:56,791 --> 00:07:00,211
Soon to assume
my maiden name of Gruber.
124
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:03,632
I'm across the street
at Mr. and Mrs. Stephens'.
125
00:07:03,673 --> 00:07:06,843
At five o'clock this afternoon.
126
00:07:06,885 --> 00:07:09,596
I just called to tell you
that I want the house,
127
00:07:09,638 --> 00:07:11,765
the car and
the bank account.
128
00:07:11,806 --> 00:07:14,601
You can keep
the mining stock.
129
00:07:14,643 --> 00:07:17,228
Well, you never know when
they might find something.
130
00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:20,815
And if they find something,
I want that, too.
131
00:07:21,858 --> 00:07:24,235
Yes, that's all I've got to say.
132
00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:26,237
What have you got to say?
133
00:07:26,947 --> 00:07:28,073
Well,
134
00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:30,450
as they say in Mexico,
135
00:07:30,492 --> 00:07:32,077
adios.
136
00:07:33,662 --> 00:07:36,164
Did he plead with you
to come back to him?
137
00:07:36,206 --> 00:07:37,248
No.
138
00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:39,793
He said, "Happy landing."
139
00:07:39,834 --> 00:07:42,754
Well, at least that's a start.
140
00:08:02,190 --> 00:08:03,817
Hi, Mr. Kravitz.
141
00:08:04,442 --> 00:08:05,694
What's new?
142
00:08:05,735 --> 00:08:08,571
Not much, Mr. Stephens.
What's new with you?
143
00:08:08,613 --> 00:08:10,782
I hate to think.
144
00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:23,086
Sam?
145
00:08:23,128 --> 00:08:24,796
Oh, Sam?
146
00:08:24,838 --> 00:08:27,424
Hi there, sweetheart.
How are you?
147
00:08:27,465 --> 00:08:28,800
- Hungry.
- Oh.
148
00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:30,593
What's for dinner?
149
00:08:30,635 --> 00:08:32,511
Alfalfa soup.
150
00:08:32,554 --> 00:08:35,181
Organic
vegetable loaf.
151
00:08:35,223 --> 00:08:36,766
And kumquat
pudding.
152
00:08:36,808 --> 00:08:40,352
Does that menu mean
what I think it means?
153
00:08:40,395 --> 00:08:41,646
What's that?
154
00:08:41,688 --> 00:08:43,982
That Mrs. Kravitz
is still our house guest.
155
00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:46,651
Oh. That's what
I thought you meant
156
00:08:46,693 --> 00:08:47,861
you thought
it meant.
157
00:08:47,902 --> 00:08:50,196
Oh, yes, yes.
She's still here.
158
00:08:50,238 --> 00:08:54,701
And to show her gratitude
for our hospitality,
159
00:08:54,743 --> 00:08:57,203
she surprised me.
By cooking dinner.
160
00:08:57,245 --> 00:08:59,706
Well, I'll surprise her
by taking my wife
161
00:08:59,748 --> 00:09:01,499
and daughter out for pizza.
Get your coat.
162
00:09:01,499 --> 00:09:03,376
Oh, honey,
you can't do that.
163
00:09:03,418 --> 00:09:04,586
It'll hurt
her feelings.
164
00:09:04,627 --> 00:09:06,379
Better her feelings
than my stomach.
165
00:09:06,421 --> 00:09:08,214
Why didn't she go to Mexico?
166
00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:12,427
I, um...
167
00:09:13,344 --> 00:09:15,263
I talked her
out of it.
168
00:09:17,265 --> 00:09:19,225
Congratulations.
169
00:09:19,267 --> 00:09:21,061
Well, uh--
uh, honey,
170
00:09:21,061 --> 00:09:22,812
we were just giving
Mr. Kravitz
171
00:09:22,854 --> 00:09:24,064
time to
get lonesome.
172
00:09:24,105 --> 00:09:27,025
I just saw Mr. Kravitz
mowing his lawn.
173
00:09:27,067 --> 00:09:29,611
He didn't look
lonesome to me.
174
00:09:29,652 --> 00:09:31,071
Well, just wait.
175
00:09:31,112 --> 00:09:32,697
Ju-Just wait.
176
00:09:32,739 --> 00:09:34,157
He'll weaken
tonight.
177
00:09:34,199 --> 00:09:36,117
And if he doesn't?
178
00:09:36,159 --> 00:09:37,952
We'll go over there
and weaken him?
179
00:09:37,994 --> 00:09:41,372
You will go over and weaken him.
I'm staying neutral.
180
00:09:46,878 --> 00:09:50,131
Well, how did you enjoy
your dinner, Mr. Stephens?
181
00:09:51,216 --> 00:09:52,801
Oh, it, uhh...
182
00:09:52,801 --> 00:09:54,761
It was
highly original.
183
00:09:54,803 --> 00:09:57,097
Well, I tried to strike
a perfect balance
184
00:09:57,138 --> 00:09:59,516
between proteins
and minerals.
185
00:09:59,557 --> 00:10:01,809
And you succeeded
admirably.
186
00:10:01,851 --> 00:10:04,062
I find that
organic vegetable loaf
187
00:10:04,104 --> 00:10:07,357
and kumquat pudding
are very compatible.
188
00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:11,444
Uh, Samantha, aren't you
supposed to visit
189
00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:13,279
one of our neighbors?
190
00:10:13,279 --> 00:10:14,280
What?
191
00:10:14,322 --> 00:10:15,448
One of our neighbors.
192
00:10:15,490 --> 00:10:18,743
Oh--
oh, y-yes, of course.
193
00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:21,121
I promised Mrs. Rich
that I'd run over
194
00:10:21,121 --> 00:10:23,081
and look at her
new dining room table.
195
00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:25,041
I'll be back in a minute.
196
00:10:29,337 --> 00:10:32,173
I regard the human body
as a furnace.
197
00:10:32,215 --> 00:10:36,219
And I regard food
as what we stoke it with.
198
00:10:43,268 --> 00:10:45,311
I'm not holdin' anything.
I got 'em.
199
00:10:45,352 --> 00:10:46,729
Oh.Ah!
200
00:10:46,729 --> 00:10:49,399
Whoever heard of gettin'
a straight flush there?
201
00:10:50,692 --> 00:10:52,902
Who could that be?
202
00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:56,364
Hi.
203
00:10:56,405 --> 00:10:58,867
Good evening, Mr. Kravitz.
I came to talk to you...
204
00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:00,827
Oh, I'm sorry.
205
00:11:00,869 --> 00:11:03,328
I thought you'd be alone
and lonely.
206
00:11:03,371 --> 00:11:06,666
[Mr. Kravitz] May I present
my poker-playing associates.
207
00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:09,502
Charlie, Fred, Al and Dave.
208
00:11:09,544 --> 00:11:10,837
How do you do?
209
00:11:10,879 --> 00:11:12,547
Pleased
to be enchanted.
210
00:11:13,548 --> 00:11:15,133
Hello,
Blondie.
211
00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:17,010
You're just
what this party needs.
212
00:11:17,051 --> 00:11:19,386
A little
female pulchritude.
213
00:11:20,679 --> 00:11:22,015
How do you do?
214
00:11:22,056 --> 00:11:24,267
Hey, Abner,
you devil you.
215
00:11:24,309 --> 00:11:26,144
Hey, listen, she's a lot
cuter than Gladys.
216
00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:28,730
Yeah, you're cuter
than Gladys.
217
00:11:28,771 --> 00:11:30,732
I didn't come here
to play poker.
218
00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:33,526
I came to reunite you
with the woman you love.
219
00:11:33,568 --> 00:11:34,944
You're wasting
your time.
220
00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:36,654
Sophia Loren
doesn't want him.
221
00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:40,116
Gentlemen,
in my opinion,
222
00:11:40,158 --> 00:11:41,743
the disintegration
of a marriage
223
00:11:41,784 --> 00:11:42,910
is no
laughing matter.
224
00:11:42,952 --> 00:11:45,538
All right, men.
Hold the laughter.
225
00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:48,666
Mr. Kravitz,
do you honestly believe
226
00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:51,419
that after 22 years, you can
get along without your wife?
227
00:11:51,419 --> 00:11:53,463
I'm not sure,
but I plan to give it
228
00:11:53,504 --> 00:11:54,881
a tremendous
effort.
229
00:11:54,881 --> 00:11:56,090
You'll fail.
230
00:11:56,090 --> 00:11:57,342
Look at
this room.
231
00:11:57,383 --> 00:11:58,801
In one day,
look what a mess it is.
232
00:11:58,843 --> 00:12:00,678
I know. Not a
health food in sight.
233
00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:01,804
Well, that's true.
234
00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:03,264
Just cold cuts
and beer.
235
00:12:03,306 --> 00:12:06,934
May I fix your loveliness
a pastrami sandwich?
236
00:12:06,976 --> 00:12:08,311
[Samantha] No, thank you.
237
00:12:08,352 --> 00:12:11,439
Mr. Kravitz, I'm very
disappointed in you.
238
00:12:11,481 --> 00:12:13,732
Why?
I'm winning.
239
00:12:13,775 --> 00:12:15,485
You're hopeless.
240
00:12:15,526 --> 00:12:16,569
Good night.
241
00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:18,279
Good night.
242
00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:38,800
Well, did you
weaken him?
243
00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:40,969
Not exactly.
244
00:12:43,096 --> 00:12:44,597
Well, you better
do something fast.
245
00:12:44,639 --> 00:12:47,433
Because if your house guest
doesn't get outta here soon,
246
00:12:47,475 --> 00:12:48,476
your husband will.
247
00:12:48,518 --> 00:12:50,520
Oh, I'm glad you're back.
248
00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:53,273
I made us a special treat.
249
00:12:54,816 --> 00:12:57,860
What are they?
Organic meatballs?
250
00:12:57,860 --> 00:13:00,071
They're soybean brownies.
251
00:13:01,739 --> 00:13:03,491
Oh, goodie.
252
00:13:22,885 --> 00:13:25,847
Daddy, is Mrs. Kravitz
still our company?
253
00:13:25,888 --> 00:13:27,015
Yes, dear.
254
00:13:27,056 --> 00:13:29,976
Mrs. Kravitz is still
our company.
255
00:13:30,018 --> 00:13:32,186
Good morning.
256
00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:38,526
I'm taking
my Saturday morning facial.
257
00:13:40,528 --> 00:13:43,155
Is that wheat germ oil?
258
00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:44,324
Huh?
259
00:13:44,365 --> 00:13:45,825
Oh, uh.
260
00:13:45,867 --> 00:13:47,410
Yes.
261
00:13:50,788 --> 00:13:52,373
Eat your breakfast,
Tabatha.
262
00:13:52,415 --> 00:13:54,333
I'm all finished.
263
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:56,210
Well, then all right,
sweetheart.
264
00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:59,380
You run out
and play.
265
00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:06,554
I'll drink this in two minutes
after my skin loosens.
266
00:14:12,059 --> 00:14:13,102
Uh, when did
you get
267
00:14:13,144 --> 00:14:15,021
the wheat
germ oil?
268
00:14:15,063 --> 00:14:16,314
Yesterday.
269
00:14:16,356 --> 00:14:17,273
Uh.
270
00:14:17,315 --> 00:14:19,192
- Do you want some?
- No, thanks.
271
00:14:19,233 --> 00:14:22,195
How much did you buy?
Enough to last for six months?
272
00:14:22,236 --> 00:14:24,280
Oh, now, sweetheart,
don't be sarcastic.
273
00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:26,824
I have decided
that Mrs. Kravitz
274
00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:29,660
is going back
to her husband today.
275
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:30,995
You've decided?
276
00:14:31,037 --> 00:14:32,830
Yeah, because somehow
I get the idea
277
00:14:32,830 --> 00:14:34,707
that she's beginning to bug you.
278
00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:36,834
Somehow,
I'm glad you noticed.
279
00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:38,044
Of course,
to, uh,
280
00:14:38,086 --> 00:14:40,046
solve the
problem,
281
00:14:40,088 --> 00:14:43,132
I'll have to use
a little, uh...
282
00:14:44,425 --> 00:14:46,010
Witchcraft?
283
00:14:46,052 --> 00:14:48,262
It would
be expedient.
284
00:14:48,304 --> 00:14:50,306
Sam, why is it
that all of your goofs
285
00:14:50,348 --> 00:14:51,933
have to be solved
by witchcraft?
286
00:14:51,974 --> 00:14:53,851
What's wrong with
a little ingenuity?
287
00:14:53,851 --> 00:14:55,269
A little
mortal logic?
288
00:14:55,269 --> 00:14:58,231
I'd even settle for a little
female sneakiness.
289
00:14:58,272 --> 00:14:59,982
All those things
take time.
290
00:15:00,024 --> 00:15:01,609
I don't care.
291
00:15:01,651 --> 00:15:02,985
The rule of this household
292
00:15:03,027 --> 00:15:05,446
is that
voodoo is forbidden.
293
00:15:09,492 --> 00:15:13,663
This is my mud pack.
It opens up my pores.
294
00:15:19,794 --> 00:15:22,630
And she
is the exception
295
00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:25,258
that makes that rule
a rule.
296
00:15:26,843 --> 00:15:28,511
You're saying
that now,
297
00:15:28,553 --> 00:15:31,180
it's all right for me
to use voodoo?
298
00:15:31,180 --> 00:15:32,682
Sam,
we're desperate.
299
00:15:32,723 --> 00:15:34,892
Okay.
300
00:15:34,892 --> 00:15:36,227
What are you
gonna do?
301
00:15:36,269 --> 00:15:39,063
I thought I'd try the old
jealousy approach.
302
00:15:39,105 --> 00:15:40,440
To make her
jealous of him,
303
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:41,649
or him
jealous of her?
304
00:15:41,691 --> 00:15:42,942
Him of her.
305
00:15:42,984 --> 00:15:44,861
So that he'd come
and beg her
306
00:15:44,902 --> 00:15:46,362
for another chance.
307
00:15:46,404 --> 00:15:47,488
I see.
308
00:15:47,530 --> 00:15:49,991
Have you selected your poor,
innocent victim yet?
309
00:15:49,991 --> 00:15:51,200
Mmm.
310
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:53,411
Mr. Leon Hogersdorf.
311
00:15:53,453 --> 00:15:56,164
Your friendly
neighborhood butcher.
312
00:15:56,205 --> 00:15:58,082
Mrs. Kravitz
once told me
313
00:15:58,124 --> 00:16:00,293
she thought he looked
like Henry Fonda.
314
00:16:00,334 --> 00:16:03,838
So, I'll make him
fond of Mrs. Kravitz.
315
00:16:08,384 --> 00:16:10,845
Do you have to go
to the butcher shop?
316
00:16:10,887 --> 00:16:11,971
No. No, no.
317
00:16:12,013 --> 00:16:14,098
I can do it
long distance.
318
00:16:15,349 --> 00:16:18,561
Leon Hogersdorf,
Forget your habits.
319
00:16:18,603 --> 00:16:21,814
Find your dream girl
In Gladys Kravitz.
320
00:16:24,358 --> 00:16:25,860
Oh, Mr. Hogersdorf.
321
00:16:25,902 --> 00:16:28,321
Add two pounds of hamburger.
322
00:16:28,321 --> 00:16:32,200
That's six nice lamb chops,
and two pounds...
323
00:16:36,287 --> 00:16:38,539
Harry, will you take
Mrs. Kelly's order?
324
00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:40,291
I have to leave.
325
00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:51,719
Did it work?
326
00:16:51,719 --> 00:16:53,095
I hope so.
327
00:16:53,137 --> 00:16:54,430
How fast
will he get here?
328
00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:56,599
As fast
as he can drive.
329
00:17:13,782 --> 00:17:15,451
Well, here he is.
330
00:17:17,286 --> 00:17:20,122
I thought you said
he looked like Henry Fonda.
331
00:17:21,916 --> 00:17:23,501
I said
Mrs. Kravitz
332
00:17:23,501 --> 00:17:25,711
thought he looked
like Henry Fonda.
333
00:17:25,753 --> 00:17:27,755
Up until yesterday,
she thought Abner
334
00:17:27,797 --> 00:17:29,423
looked like
Cary Grant.
335
00:17:34,595 --> 00:17:38,349
Say, now I wonder
who that could be.
336
00:17:41,352 --> 00:17:42,728
Hello,
Mrs. Stephens.
337
00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:43,813
Oh,
Mr. Hogersdorf.
338
00:17:43,854 --> 00:17:45,815
What a
pleasant surprise.
339
00:17:45,856 --> 00:17:47,400
Is Mrs. Kravitz here?
340
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:50,236
As a matter of fact, she is.
341
00:17:50,278 --> 00:17:53,489
For some strange reason,
I just have to see her.
342
00:17:53,489 --> 00:17:56,367
Mrs. Kravitz?
Look who's here.
343
00:18:00,037 --> 00:18:02,039
Since when
do you deliver?
344
00:18:02,039 --> 00:18:04,417
I don't.
345
00:18:04,458 --> 00:18:06,085
I mean I don't
deliver meat,
346
00:18:06,127 --> 00:18:08,170
but I do
deliver flowers.
347
00:18:09,589 --> 00:18:10,798
Oh!
348
00:18:11,799 --> 00:18:13,926
They're
beautiful!
349
00:18:17,263 --> 00:18:18,513
What are they?
350
00:18:18,556 --> 00:18:21,267
I don't know, the florist
didn't tell me.
351
00:18:21,309 --> 00:18:23,060
When did I go
to the florist?
352
00:18:23,060 --> 00:18:25,104
Uh, Mr. Hogersdorf,
353
00:18:25,146 --> 00:18:27,982
you remember my husband,
don't you?
354
00:18:28,023 --> 00:18:29,942
Oh, sure.
Nice to see you.
355
00:18:29,984 --> 00:18:31,484
Likewise.
356
00:18:31,527 --> 00:18:34,155
My butcher, who looks
like Henry Fonda,
357
00:18:34,196 --> 00:18:35,823
brought me
flowers.
358
00:18:35,865 --> 00:18:37,491
I see.
359
00:18:38,826 --> 00:18:40,036
How come?
360
00:18:40,077 --> 00:18:42,997
Because I, uh... because I...
361
00:18:43,039 --> 00:18:44,915
That's a good question.
362
00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:49,962
Because I heard you and
your husband have separated.
363
00:18:50,004 --> 00:18:51,297
And I hoped flowers
might soothe
364
00:18:51,339 --> 00:18:53,507
the difficult period
of transition.
365
00:18:54,342 --> 00:18:56,677
Why am I talking so formal?
366
00:18:57,803 --> 00:19:00,848
I don't know, but I like
the way it sounds.
367
00:19:04,101 --> 00:19:08,272
I also had the selfish motive
of wanting to be first in line.
368
00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:10,023
First in line for what?
369
00:19:10,066 --> 00:19:13,234
For when you are ready
to begin dating other men.
370
00:19:13,277 --> 00:19:16,071
My butcher wants to date me!
371
00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:18,491
I heard!
372
00:19:18,532 --> 00:19:20,409
Well, if you'll
excuse me.
373
00:19:20,409 --> 00:19:22,869
I'll put these
in my boudoir.
374
00:19:30,836 --> 00:19:32,296
Is it hot in here?
375
00:19:32,338 --> 00:19:34,465
No, I don't
think so.
376
00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:40,513
Oh, I must be coming down
with Asiatic flu.
377
00:19:50,523 --> 00:19:51,691
Doing great,
honey.
378
00:19:51,732 --> 00:19:54,276
But how does this
make Mr. Kravitz jealous
379
00:19:54,318 --> 00:19:55,653
if he isn't here?
380
00:19:55,695 --> 00:19:58,071
Oh, um,
he'll be here.
381
00:20:18,426 --> 00:20:21,053
Mr. Hogersdorf,
are you all right?
382
00:20:21,095 --> 00:20:22,304
I don't
think so.
383
00:20:28,310 --> 00:20:29,979
Excuse me.
384
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,819
May I please have a
six-pack of cold beer?
385
00:20:36,861 --> 00:20:38,028
I beg your pardon?
386
00:20:38,070 --> 00:20:40,281
Oh. Uh, that's funny.
387
00:20:40,281 --> 00:20:42,742
I thought I was going
to the liquor store.
388
00:20:42,782 --> 00:20:43,826
Him too?
389
00:20:43,868 --> 00:20:46,954
Well, as long as you're here,
come on in.
390
00:20:52,334 --> 00:20:53,377
Hello, Gladys.
391
00:20:53,419 --> 00:20:54,962
You're too late.
392
00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:01,177
Uh, Mr. Abner Kravitz,
393
00:21:01,218 --> 00:21:04,096
have you met
Mr. Leon Hogersdorf?
394
00:21:06,056 --> 00:21:10,519
Sure, I've spent many happy
hours haggling with him.
395
00:21:10,519 --> 00:21:11,979
Kravitz,
you might as well know now.
396
00:21:11,979 --> 00:21:13,981
I'm madly in love
with your wife.
397
00:21:15,441 --> 00:21:16,942
Who said that?
398
00:21:16,984 --> 00:21:18,109
You did.
399
00:21:19,153 --> 00:21:20,321
You must be kidding.
400
00:21:20,362 --> 00:21:21,614
I've been in love with her
401
00:21:21,655 --> 00:21:23,491
since the first day she
walked into my shop,
402
00:21:23,491 --> 00:21:25,701
and asked if my chickens
were healthy.
403
00:21:25,743 --> 00:21:28,454
How come you
never told me?
404
00:21:29,663 --> 00:21:31,165
I knew you were married.
405
00:21:31,207 --> 00:21:33,709
She still is.
406
00:21:34,417 --> 00:21:36,128
Come on,
Mr. Kravitz.
407
00:21:36,170 --> 00:21:38,130
Stand up
for your rights.
408
00:21:38,172 --> 00:21:39,381
Who, me?
409
00:21:39,423 --> 00:21:41,550
Say that Mrs. Kravitz
belongs to you.
410
00:21:41,550 --> 00:21:43,969
She always has
and she always will.
411
00:21:44,011 --> 00:21:45,012
Well, wait a minute.
412
00:21:45,054 --> 00:21:46,806
Let's not be hasty.
413
00:21:48,516 --> 00:21:51,060
Mr. Kravitz,
aren't you jealous?
414
00:21:51,060 --> 00:21:54,563
Yes. But I'll
get over it.
415
00:21:54,605 --> 00:21:58,400
I bear no hard feelings
for your total ingratitude.
416
00:21:58,400 --> 00:22:01,487
My ingratitude
for what?
417
00:22:01,529 --> 00:22:03,155
For all that I've done for you.
418
00:22:03,196 --> 00:22:05,657
For the 22 years
of sacrifice.
419
00:22:06,700 --> 00:22:08,661
You talk about sacrifice?
420
00:22:08,702 --> 00:22:11,080
You don't know
what sacrifice is.
421
00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:14,083
Why do you think I put up
my hair in curlers,
422
00:22:14,124 --> 00:22:15,542
and do beauty angles
423
00:22:15,584 --> 00:22:17,795
and take facials
and do exercises?
424
00:22:17,837 --> 00:22:20,172
Because you like
to torment me.
425
00:22:20,214 --> 00:22:21,465
Wrong.
426
00:22:21,507 --> 00:22:24,176
To make myself
attractive to you.
427
00:22:24,218 --> 00:22:25,344
Oh, I admit,
428
00:22:25,386 --> 00:22:28,180
I might be fighting
a losing battle,
429
00:22:28,222 --> 00:22:30,307
but at least
I try.
430
00:22:30,349 --> 00:22:33,561
Just like I try
to take care of you.
431
00:22:33,561 --> 00:22:35,813
I regard the human body
as a furnace,
432
00:22:35,855 --> 00:22:39,275
and I regard the food
that you put in it--
433
00:22:39,316 --> 00:22:43,070
Mrs. Kravitz,
aren't you digressing?
434
00:22:43,112 --> 00:22:46,615
Isn't the point you're making
that your motive is love?
435
00:22:47,199 --> 00:22:48,993
Yes.
436
00:22:50,411 --> 00:22:53,205
At least,
it used to be.
437
00:22:53,247 --> 00:22:56,083
Still is,
isn't it?
438
00:22:56,125 --> 00:22:57,626
Is it, Gladys?
439
00:22:58,836 --> 00:23:00,087
Why?
440
00:23:00,129 --> 00:23:02,131
What difference would it make?
441
00:23:02,172 --> 00:23:04,717
I'll show you after you tell me.
442
00:23:04,758 --> 00:23:06,927
Is your motive still love?
443
00:23:09,263 --> 00:23:10,472
Yes.
444
00:23:10,513 --> 00:23:13,601
It's combined with
a little... hatred.
445
00:23:13,601 --> 00:23:16,103
But... yes.
446
00:23:16,896 --> 00:23:18,022
Okay, fella.
447
00:23:18,063 --> 00:23:19,690
Get outta here
before my wife and I
448
00:23:19,732 --> 00:23:21,942
decide to buy
our chickens elsewhere.
449
00:23:25,487 --> 00:23:28,532
I-I hope you
get over me!
450
00:24:00,397 --> 00:24:02,398
Shall we go home,
my darling?
451
00:24:02,398 --> 00:24:05,234
Anything you say,
honeybunch.
452
00:24:05,277 --> 00:24:06,987
I'll pick up
my things later.
453
00:24:09,990 --> 00:24:12,451
Bye-bye, Mrs. Kravitz,
Mr. Kravitz.
454
00:24:12,493 --> 00:24:14,994
Bye! Bye.
455
00:24:16,163 --> 00:24:17,957
Phew! Nice going!
456
00:24:17,998 --> 00:24:19,959
For a while,
I thought you struck out.
457
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:21,126
Yeah, so did I.
458
00:24:21,167 --> 00:24:23,337
Because the only spell
I put on Mr. Kravitz,
459
00:24:23,379 --> 00:24:24,964
was to get him
to come over here.
460
00:24:25,005 --> 00:24:27,800
Then everything he and Mrs.
Kravitz said was unassisted?
461
00:24:27,840 --> 00:24:30,302
Straight from
their hearts.
462
00:24:30,344 --> 00:24:31,804
You know
what that proves?
463
00:24:31,845 --> 00:24:32,680
What?
464
00:24:32,721 --> 00:24:34,473
It proves
that the only thing
465
00:24:34,515 --> 00:24:36,225
stronger
than witchcraft...
466
00:24:36,266 --> 00:24:37,893
is love.
467
00:24:37,935 --> 00:24:39,103
I know.
468
00:24:39,144 --> 00:24:42,856
I know. I'd stake
my marriage on it.
31650
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