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1
00:00:01,460 --> 00:00:02,920
You almost ready, honey?
2
00:00:02,920 --> 00:00:04,003
[Samantha] Right there.
3
00:00:04,046 --> 00:00:05,255
We don't want to be late.
4
00:00:05,297 --> 00:00:07,257
I promised Larry we'd
be there at 7 sharp.
5
00:00:07,299 --> 00:00:09,259
We will be.
6
00:00:09,259 --> 00:00:10,719
I don't mean to rush you,
sweetheart.
7
00:00:10,760 --> 00:00:12,095
It's just that
it takes women longer
8
00:00:12,137 --> 00:00:14,139
to get dressed
than it does men.
9
00:00:14,139 --> 00:00:15,265
Uh-huh.
10
00:00:15,307 --> 00:00:17,142
Oh! And, honey,
be particularly nice
11
00:00:17,184 --> 00:00:18,310
to Miss Kabaker,
will you?
12
00:00:18,310 --> 00:00:19,895
I'll kill her
with kindness.
13
00:00:19,937 --> 00:00:23,023
You know what an important
client Mr. Kabaker is.
14
00:00:23,065 --> 00:00:25,317
And his daughter carries
a lot of weight with him.
15
00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:26,652
I understand.
16
00:00:26,693 --> 00:00:29,696
So if she has a good time,
then he will too.
17
00:00:29,738 --> 00:00:31,490
Of course.
18
00:00:31,532 --> 00:00:34,493
It'll mean a lot
to Larry and the agency.
19
00:00:34,534 --> 00:00:36,203
Well, how are you doing,
sweetheart?
20
00:00:36,245 --> 00:00:37,246
We better get going.
21
00:00:37,287 --> 00:00:39,456
Oh, I'm hurrying, sweetheart.
22
00:00:40,290 --> 00:00:42,084
Hey, you're getting faster.
23
00:00:42,125 --> 00:00:45,003
I only beat you
by a handkerchief.
24
00:00:45,045 --> 00:00:46,380
I saved a lot of time
25
00:00:46,421 --> 00:00:49,383
by taking a shower
with my dress on.
26
00:00:49,424 --> 00:00:51,093
Well, let's go.
Darrin.
27
00:00:51,134 --> 00:00:52,427
Hm?
28
00:01:46,188 --> 00:01:48,150
Nice party, isn't it?
29
00:01:48,191 --> 00:01:49,443
I'll say.
30
00:01:49,484 --> 00:01:52,613
Another mad whirl
with the jet set.
31
00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:55,032
Mind if we borrow you
for a moment, J.K.?
32
00:01:55,073 --> 00:01:56,450
Oh, excuse me, dear.
33
00:01:56,491 --> 00:01:58,619
We'll bring your father
right back, Miss Kabaker.
34
00:01:58,660 --> 00:02:00,662
It's just a little
dull business.
35
00:02:03,081 --> 00:02:05,000
So is this party.
36
00:02:05,042 --> 00:02:06,585
I'm sure it always
seems that way
37
00:02:06,627 --> 00:02:08,086
when you don't know
many people.
38
00:02:08,127 --> 00:02:10,464
That's why I hate
affairs like this.
39
00:02:10,505 --> 00:02:12,924
Just because somebody handles
your father's account,
40
00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:16,011
you have to mingle like
you had something in common.
41
00:02:16,053 --> 00:02:18,347
It must be
very trying.
42
00:02:18,388 --> 00:02:20,974
But you certainly chose
a lovely dress for the occasion.
43
00:02:21,016 --> 00:02:24,936
It's not difficult when one
has taste, Mrs. Stubbins.
44
00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:27,856
Stephens.
45
00:02:27,898 --> 00:02:30,859
My compliments on your dress,
Mrs. Stephens.
46
00:02:30,859 --> 00:02:32,151
Oh, thank you.
47
00:02:32,194 --> 00:02:35,280
It's really difficult to tell
those inexpensive copies
48
00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:36,865
from the originals nowadays.
49
00:02:42,037 --> 00:02:44,831
Do you know
Dr. Hafta, dear?
50
00:02:44,873 --> 00:02:45,999
I beg your pardon.
51
00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:47,959
Dr. Hafta,
the plastic surgeon.
52
00:02:47,959 --> 00:02:49,419
Does beautiful nose work.
53
00:02:49,461 --> 00:02:51,171
No, I don't know him.
54
00:02:51,213 --> 00:02:53,674
It's funny. I could've
sworn when you--
55
00:02:54,800 --> 00:02:57,386
Oh, well. Excuse me.
56
00:03:02,056 --> 00:03:03,225
No, thank you.
57
00:03:03,266 --> 00:03:04,559
Uh--
58
00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:10,607
What's the matter,
darling?
59
00:03:10,649 --> 00:03:12,401
You look like
Darrin just canceled
60
00:03:12,401 --> 00:03:13,610
all your charge accounts.
61
00:03:13,651 --> 00:03:16,530
I shouldn't let it
bother me, I guess.
62
00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:18,907
That Miss Kabaker's
the most disagreeable
63
00:03:18,949 --> 00:03:20,784
little snob I've ever met.
64
00:03:20,826 --> 00:03:22,035
Well, cheer up!
65
00:03:22,077 --> 00:03:24,913
There's always a sour meatball
in the chafing dish.
66
00:03:24,955 --> 00:03:26,498
Maybe she'll get it.
67
00:03:37,426 --> 00:03:38,969
Please?
68
00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:47,018
Have you tried
the meatballs?
69
00:03:47,060 --> 00:03:49,187
No, I never
eat them myself.
70
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,939
Oh. Heh.
71
00:03:50,981 --> 00:03:54,234
Well, I hope I'll be
seeing more of you.
72
00:03:54,276 --> 00:03:57,195
Maybe we could get together
for lunch some afternoon.
73
00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:59,990
You think about food a lot,
don't you?
74
00:04:00,991 --> 00:04:02,075
Well, no, I--
75
00:04:02,117 --> 00:04:03,577
I wish I could be like you.
76
00:04:03,618 --> 00:04:07,748
Carefree, not give a darn
what my figure looks like.
77
00:04:14,045 --> 00:04:15,046
[Miss Kabaker] Oh!
78
00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:16,089
What's the matter?
79
00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:17,132
You threw it at me!
80
00:04:17,174 --> 00:04:18,925
Oh!
Goodness!
81
00:04:18,967 --> 00:04:19,885
Oh! She did it!
82
00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:21,720
She deliberately
threw that at me!
83
00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:23,764
Never mind, daughter.
I'll take you home.
84
00:04:23,805 --> 00:04:24,890
Really, Larry.
85
00:04:24,890 --> 00:04:26,475
The conduct of some
of your guests leaves
86
00:04:26,516 --> 00:04:27,476
a lot to be desired.
87
00:04:27,517 --> 00:04:29,101
I-I-I'm sorry,
J.K.
88
00:04:29,144 --> 00:04:30,437
I-I'm sure
Mrs. Stephens
89
00:04:30,479 --> 00:04:31,855
wouldn't do
anything like that.
90
00:04:31,897 --> 00:04:34,024
It was an accident.
91
00:04:36,818 --> 00:04:38,153
Uh...
92
00:04:46,495 --> 00:04:47,621
"Nothing," she says.
93
00:04:47,621 --> 00:04:50,123
One little favor
I ask you to do.
94
00:04:50,165 --> 00:04:51,249
And what do you do?
95
00:04:51,249 --> 00:04:52,501
You wiggle that
beak of yours
96
00:04:52,501 --> 00:04:54,461
and really
cause trouble!
97
00:04:55,837 --> 00:04:57,880
Ooh! The least
you could've done
98
00:04:57,923 --> 00:04:58,924
was ignore her.
99
00:04:58,964 --> 00:05:01,301
You're a great little
helpmate, you are.
100
00:05:01,343 --> 00:05:04,053
Always anxious to help
your husband's career.
101
00:05:04,095 --> 00:05:08,600
Darrin, you didn't speak to me
all the way home in the car.
102
00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:12,270
Would you please show me
the same courtesy now?
103
00:05:12,270 --> 00:05:13,271
Gladly.
104
00:05:13,271 --> 00:05:14,689
Good night!
105
00:05:19,027 --> 00:05:20,403
Good night.
106
00:05:25,116 --> 00:05:26,243
And another thing.
107
00:05:26,284 --> 00:05:28,370
I'll tell you when
we're not talking.
108
00:05:28,370 --> 00:05:30,413
I wear the pants
in this family.
109
00:05:33,083 --> 00:05:34,709
Says you.
110
00:05:38,213 --> 00:05:39,297
Says me!
111
00:05:39,339 --> 00:05:41,633
And I'll say
one more thing.
112
00:05:43,176 --> 00:05:44,469
What?!
113
00:05:44,469 --> 00:05:46,178
Now we're not talking!
114
00:05:48,056 --> 00:05:49,683
Now you're talking.
115
00:05:55,856 --> 00:05:56,982
Ooh!
116
00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:07,993
Hi, Larry.
117
00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:13,456
I, uh, guess you're still
pretty upset about last night.
118
00:06:13,498 --> 00:06:15,916
I passed "upset"
at 3:00 this morning.
119
00:06:15,959 --> 00:06:17,836
Right now,
I'm up to homicidal.
120
00:06:17,878 --> 00:06:20,005
Mr. Kabaker was pretty mad
last night.
121
00:06:20,046 --> 00:06:21,839
I wonder what he's
thinking this morning.
122
00:06:21,839 --> 00:06:23,675
I know what I'm thinking.
123
00:06:23,717 --> 00:06:25,051
But I'm too much
of a gentleman
124
00:06:25,093 --> 00:06:27,721
to use certain phrases
about a woman.
125
00:06:27,762 --> 00:06:29,097
So let's put it this way.
126
00:06:29,139 --> 00:06:31,224
If I saw that your wife
was going to be hit
127
00:06:31,266 --> 00:06:35,812
by a falling safe,
I'd just stand there and smile.
128
00:06:35,854 --> 00:06:38,315
Larry, that's not very nice.
129
00:06:38,356 --> 00:06:39,983
I passed "nice" at 2:00
this morning,
130
00:06:40,025 --> 00:06:42,736
right after Kabaker phoned
to cancel the account.
131
00:06:42,777 --> 00:06:45,363
Fortunately, I was able
to talk him out of it.
132
00:06:45,404 --> 00:06:47,073
Well, I'm sorry
about that, Larry,
133
00:06:47,115 --> 00:06:49,451
but Sam was provoked
into doing what she did.
134
00:06:49,451 --> 00:06:51,452
It was thoughtless
and inexcusable!
135
00:06:51,494 --> 00:06:53,163
A child would've
had more sense.
136
00:06:53,204 --> 00:06:54,205
Wait a minute!
137
00:06:54,247 --> 00:06:56,082
Kabaker's daughter deserved it.
138
00:06:56,124 --> 00:06:57,791
She's a sarcastic snob.
139
00:06:57,834 --> 00:06:59,210
And her father ought
to wash out her mouth
140
00:06:59,252 --> 00:07:01,129
with some of that
crummy detergent he makes.
141
00:07:01,129 --> 00:07:04,549
That crummy detergent happens
to keep us in business.
142
00:07:04,549 --> 00:07:06,760
Sure, Miss Kabaker
can do no wrong
143
00:07:06,801 --> 00:07:08,762
as long as her father's got
wall-to-wall money!
144
00:07:08,803 --> 00:07:10,347
If you were
a billionaire,
145
00:07:10,388 --> 00:07:12,223
Samantha still acted
like a child!
146
00:07:12,265 --> 00:07:13,934
Oh, yeah?!
Yeah!
147
00:07:13,975 --> 00:07:16,061
At least she could've
used a little discretion,
148
00:07:16,102 --> 00:07:17,062
like my wife.
149
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:18,521
Larry.
150
00:07:18,563 --> 00:07:21,149
I've got news for you.
151
00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:24,611
That wife of yours has come up
with a few nuggets herself.
152
00:07:24,653 --> 00:07:25,737
Oh, really?
153
00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:27,405
I mean, if we're
talking about boners,
154
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:28,949
let's get all the names
on the list.
155
00:07:28,990 --> 00:07:32,369
Name me just one boner that
Louise ever pulled. Just one.
156
00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:33,620
There was the time she thought
157
00:07:33,662 --> 00:07:34,955
the client's wife
was his mother,
158
00:07:34,996 --> 00:07:36,790
the time she forgot
the theater tickets,
159
00:07:36,831 --> 00:07:38,667
and--
I said one.
160
00:07:40,669 --> 00:07:42,921
So don't go making cracks
about my wife.
161
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:46,174
Just worry about that cuckoo
that you're married to.
162
00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:49,636
Well, if Louise
is such a drag,
163
00:07:49,678 --> 00:07:52,138
you don't have to associate
with her anymore.
164
00:07:52,180 --> 00:07:53,181
Agreed.
165
00:07:53,223 --> 00:07:55,767
And you can consider
Samantha off-limits too.
166
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:59,145
In fact you don't have
to associate with me anymore.
167
00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:01,815
Well, let's add my vote
to that proposal
168
00:08:01,856 --> 00:08:03,316
and make it unanimous!
169
00:08:03,358 --> 00:08:04,442
Great!
170
00:08:04,442 --> 00:08:05,527
You keep your big, flat feet
171
00:08:05,568 --> 00:08:06,695
out of my office,
172
00:08:06,736 --> 00:08:07,821
and I'll keep mine
out of yours.
173
00:08:07,862 --> 00:08:09,322
I'll go you one better.
174
00:08:09,364 --> 00:08:11,825
I'll keep my feet and everything
that's attached to them
175
00:08:11,866 --> 00:08:13,201
out of the entire building!
176
00:08:13,243 --> 00:08:14,911
I quit!
Good!
177
00:08:14,953 --> 00:08:17,122
You just saved me
two weeks' severance pay.
178
00:08:17,163 --> 00:08:18,123
Cheap.
179
00:08:18,164 --> 00:08:19,582
Cheap! Cheap!
180
00:08:30,552 --> 00:08:31,886
Hi.
181
00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:33,847
I thought
I heard you come in.
182
00:08:33,888 --> 00:08:35,348
What are you doing
home so early?
183
00:08:35,390 --> 00:08:37,100
I got sick.
184
00:08:37,142 --> 00:08:38,184
Sick?
185
00:08:38,226 --> 00:08:41,021
Of working.
I quit!
186
00:08:41,062 --> 00:08:42,522
Quit?
187
00:08:42,564 --> 00:08:43,523
Quit!
188
00:08:43,565 --> 00:08:44,899
Evacuated the premises!
189
00:08:44,941 --> 00:08:48,361
Ceased working!
Hit the road!
190
00:08:48,403 --> 00:08:49,821
What happened?
191
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:52,365
Oh, I shouldn't be
telling you this.
192
00:08:52,407 --> 00:08:53,491
Why not?
193
00:08:53,491 --> 00:08:55,035
Because we're not
talking!
194
00:08:56,285 --> 00:09:00,040
Well, if we were talking,
195
00:09:00,081 --> 00:09:03,626
did it have anything to do
with what happened last night?
196
00:09:03,668 --> 00:09:05,170
Well, Larry and I got
into an argument,
197
00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:08,089
and he said some things
about you I didn't like.
198
00:09:08,089 --> 00:09:10,633
You said some pretty unkind
things about me yourself.
199
00:09:10,675 --> 00:09:12,552
That's different.
I'm your husband.
200
00:09:12,594 --> 00:09:14,721
Well, I appreciate
your defending me.
201
00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:16,264
But whatever he said,
he was right.
202
00:09:16,306 --> 00:09:17,640
And so are you.
203
00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:19,976
I should've had
more control last night.
204
00:09:20,018 --> 00:09:22,771
Well, Kabaker's daughter
deserved it.
205
00:09:22,812 --> 00:09:24,397
Well, I still
could've ignored her.
206
00:09:24,439 --> 00:09:26,649
I wouldn't let you
ignore her.
207
00:09:26,691 --> 00:09:28,151
You did the right thing.
208
00:09:28,193 --> 00:09:32,447
Darrin, when you pick a side,
will you please stick with it?
209
00:09:32,489 --> 00:09:33,907
Now, it's all over
and done with.
210
00:09:33,948 --> 00:09:35,617
I've already got
another job lined up,
211
00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:37,410
and I've got to hurry
over to an interview.
212
00:09:37,452 --> 00:09:38,912
Another job?
213
00:09:38,953 --> 00:09:40,705
Darrin, that's ridiculous.
214
00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:42,082
Ridiculous?
215
00:09:42,123 --> 00:09:43,750
The Ames Advertising has had
feelers out for me
216
00:09:43,792 --> 00:09:44,876
for a long time.
217
00:09:44,918 --> 00:09:46,503
Well, they're gonna
get me.
218
00:09:46,544 --> 00:09:48,254
I hope you don't get it.
219
00:09:49,297 --> 00:09:50,423
I can't miss.
220
00:09:50,465 --> 00:09:52,467
I'm the perfect man
for the job.
221
00:09:54,886 --> 00:09:56,721
Louise, it's ridiculous.
222
00:09:56,763 --> 00:09:58,807
Larry and Darrin are simply
being stubborn.
223
00:09:58,848 --> 00:10:01,309
Now, we have to figure out
a way to get them together.
224
00:10:01,309 --> 00:10:02,519
Agreed.
225
00:10:02,559 --> 00:10:04,312
Larry always did have
a stubborn streak.
226
00:10:04,354 --> 00:10:05,730
Like when we were dating,
227
00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:07,065
I knew that
if I was the first
228
00:10:07,107 --> 00:10:09,776
to mention the word
"marriage," I was dead.
229
00:10:09,818 --> 00:10:12,070
How'd you finally
get the idea across?
230
00:10:12,070 --> 00:10:13,696
Well, one night
he blew a smoke ring,
231
00:10:13,738 --> 00:10:15,657
I stuck my finger
through it and said, "I do."
232
00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:19,660
Oh, men are such
little boys, really.
233
00:10:19,702 --> 00:10:21,037
They don't know
what's good for them.
234
00:10:21,078 --> 00:10:24,040
Right. And it's up to us
to show them that
235
00:10:24,082 --> 00:10:26,626
they can live happy,
contented lives,
236
00:10:26,668 --> 00:10:28,044
even if it makes them
miserable.
237
00:10:28,086 --> 00:10:30,880
So how do we get
our two mules together
238
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,298
when they're not even talking?
239
00:10:32,340 --> 00:10:34,050
Do you have any ideas?
240
00:10:34,050 --> 00:10:35,677
Mm-hm.
241
00:10:35,718 --> 00:10:38,096
Oh, it's very simple, really.
242
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:41,933
The way to unite people
is to give them a common enemy.
243
00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:43,476
Oh, I'll buy that.
244
00:10:43,518 --> 00:10:48,314
Now, in Darrin and Larry's case,
the common enemy will be us.
245
00:10:48,356 --> 00:10:49,816
Us?
246
00:10:49,857 --> 00:10:51,651
You mean a war of the sexes?
247
00:10:51,693 --> 00:10:54,612
Oh, no, no.
Not an all-out war.
248
00:10:54,612 --> 00:10:56,030
Just a skirmish.
249
00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:58,616
We'll not only
get them together,
250
00:10:58,658 --> 00:10:59,701
we'll teach them a lesson.
251
00:10:59,701 --> 00:11:00,910
So, what's your plan?
252
00:11:00,910 --> 00:11:02,162
I can't wait to hear it.
253
00:11:02,203 --> 00:11:05,498
Well-- Oh, I just had
a terrible thought.
254
00:11:05,540 --> 00:11:06,499
What?
255
00:11:06,541 --> 00:11:07,833
It's too late.
256
00:11:07,876 --> 00:11:10,044
You said Darrin was
taking that other job.
257
00:11:11,212 --> 00:11:15,842
Oh, um... I wouldn't
worry about that.
258
00:11:15,884 --> 00:11:18,303
Darrin doesn't have a chance
of landing that job
259
00:11:18,344 --> 00:11:19,721
with Ames Advertising.
260
00:11:19,721 --> 00:11:21,890
How can you be so sure?
261
00:11:23,892 --> 00:11:25,852
I'm a witch.
262
00:11:25,894 --> 00:11:28,313
You said it, honey.
I didn't.
263
00:11:30,565 --> 00:11:31,982
How about that?
264
00:11:36,738 --> 00:11:41,534
Well... Stephens, I'm very glad
you could get in to see us.
265
00:11:41,576 --> 00:11:42,785
Was the traffic bad?
266
00:11:42,827 --> 00:11:45,246
No. Actually I came in
on the choo-choo.
267
00:11:45,288 --> 00:11:46,539
Choo-choo?
268
00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:48,917
I meant, the train.
269
00:11:48,958 --> 00:11:50,835
I hadn't eaten,
so it gave me a chance
270
00:11:50,877 --> 00:11:53,338
to relax and, uh,
have my din-din.
271
00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:57,800
Ah, I see.
272
00:11:57,842 --> 00:12:01,221
Uh, food's really
quite good.
273
00:12:01,261 --> 00:12:03,431
'Course nobody
can cook like my mummy--
274
00:12:03,473 --> 00:12:04,390
Mommy--
275
00:12:04,432 --> 00:12:05,892
Mother.
276
00:12:07,309 --> 00:12:10,396
Uh-- She really knows
how to fill your tum-tum.
277
00:12:11,606 --> 00:12:14,400
Yes.
278
00:12:14,442 --> 00:12:19,447
Stephens, your credentials
are most impressive.
279
00:12:19,489 --> 00:12:20,740
You know, I always say
280
00:12:20,782 --> 00:12:23,284
that all horses
have teeth and a tail.
281
00:12:23,326 --> 00:12:26,828
But it's that old track record
that makes thoroughbreds.
282
00:12:28,456 --> 00:12:29,415
Stephens?
283
00:12:29,457 --> 00:12:30,625
Mm?
284
00:12:30,667 --> 00:12:32,252
What are you doing?
285
00:12:38,424 --> 00:12:40,176
I'm sucking my thumb.
286
00:12:41,636 --> 00:12:43,096
Sucking your thumb.
287
00:12:44,347 --> 00:12:47,934
Uh, yes, I've always sucked
my thumb when I'm afraid.
288
00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:51,646
You're joking.
289
00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:52,772
Oh, no, no.
290
00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:54,649
I wish I had my teddy bear.
291
00:12:57,360 --> 00:13:00,947
Mr. Stephens, I'm sorry,
but this interview is over.
292
00:13:00,989 --> 00:13:03,449
Oh, oh, Mr. Ames,
I-I-I don't know what to say.
293
00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:04,450
This isn't me!
294
00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:05,451
I don't care!
295
00:13:05,493 --> 00:13:07,160
Whoever it is,
his interview is at an end!
296
00:13:07,203 --> 00:13:09,831
Mr. Ames, please,
if you'll just let me explain.
297
00:13:09,831 --> 00:13:11,874
There's some reason
for this going on--
298
00:13:16,546 --> 00:13:18,131
I made a boo-boo.
299
00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:21,050
Get out of my sight!
300
00:13:21,050 --> 00:13:22,302
Mr. Ames, uh,
301
00:13:22,343 --> 00:13:24,721
it's like some strange force
got ahold of me.
302
00:13:24,761 --> 00:13:25,638
It's--
303
00:13:25,679 --> 00:13:28,474
Uh--
Samantha!
304
00:13:28,516 --> 00:13:30,268
Out!
305
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:36,357
I believe this is yours.
306
00:13:51,789 --> 00:13:57,420
♪ Rock-a-bye baby
On a tree top ♪
307
00:13:57,462 --> 00:14:02,050
♪ When the wind blows
The cradle will rock ♪
308
00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:03,593
Samantha!
309
00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:09,974
♪ I have a strong feeling
Bad words will fly ♪
310
00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:16,939
♪ Your daddy just came home
With blood in his eyes ♪
311
00:14:16,939 --> 00:14:19,275
Samantha,
where are you?!
312
00:14:19,317 --> 00:14:23,321
Well, Tabatha,
time for beddy-bye.
313
00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:26,324
Now, I'm gonna do
something to your daddy
314
00:14:26,366 --> 00:14:29,160
that you're too little
to understand.
315
00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:31,162
But it's for his own good.
316
00:14:31,204 --> 00:14:32,538
Sam!
317
00:14:34,082 --> 00:14:35,458
Wish me luck.
318
00:14:40,630 --> 00:14:43,007
Sam, where are you?!
Come out here and face me!
319
00:14:43,007 --> 00:14:43,841
Yes?
320
00:14:43,925 --> 00:14:45,676
You've been sticking
that magic nose of yours
321
00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:47,845
where it doesn't belong again.
Don't try to deny it!
322
00:14:47,845 --> 00:14:49,222
All right, I won't.
323
00:14:49,263 --> 00:14:51,391
Come on, Sam, don't make me
drag it outta you.
324
00:14:51,432 --> 00:14:53,017
Just--
325
00:14:53,059 --> 00:14:53,810
You admit it?
326
00:14:53,851 --> 00:14:55,186
I only did it to save you
327
00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:57,980
from making the biggest
mistake of your life.
328
00:14:58,022 --> 00:15:00,191
That I did
on a day long ago,
329
00:15:00,233 --> 00:15:03,069
which we now laughingly
call our anniversary.
330
00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:04,404
Go ahead. Rave on.
331
00:15:04,445 --> 00:15:06,155
Let me know when the steam
comes out of your nose.
332
00:15:06,197 --> 00:15:07,865
You can help me
with the ironing.
333
00:15:07,865 --> 00:15:10,535
When will you learn to stop
meddling in my business?
334
00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:13,037
When you learn
to conduct it better.
335
00:15:13,079 --> 00:15:15,164
Oh, well, I can't be
doing too bad.
336
00:15:15,206 --> 00:15:18,751
You've got a lovely house,
a nice car, lovely clothes.
337
00:15:18,793 --> 00:15:21,671
But to you, I suppose,
I'm still a big dumb-head!
338
00:15:22,088 --> 00:15:23,464
I didn't say that.
339
00:15:23,506 --> 00:15:25,091
But you're thinking it.
Go ahead. Out with it.
340
00:15:25,133 --> 00:15:27,051
Oh, really, Darrin.
Go ahead. Say it.
341
00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:28,594
Okay.
342
00:15:28,636 --> 00:15:30,138
You're a big dumb-head!
343
00:15:30,179 --> 00:15:31,806
You're calling me names now.
344
00:15:31,848 --> 00:15:34,225
Well, when you talk like that,
you are a dumb-head.
345
00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:35,726
And I'll tell you
one more--
346
00:15:35,768 --> 00:15:36,769
Hold it! Hold it!
347
00:15:36,811 --> 00:15:38,062
Stop the world.
348
00:15:38,104 --> 00:15:39,772
We are about to get the word
from the high lama.
349
00:15:39,814 --> 00:15:42,984
If you had any sense at all,
you would get down on your hands
350
00:15:43,025 --> 00:15:45,027
and knees and crawl back
to Larry Tate
351
00:15:45,069 --> 00:15:46,446
and beg his forgiveness.
352
00:15:46,487 --> 00:15:47,738
Me, crawl?
353
00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:50,533
Well, we both know that
without him you'd be nothing.
354
00:15:50,575 --> 00:15:52,577
He taught you
everything you know.
355
00:15:52,618 --> 00:15:53,619
He taught me?
356
00:15:53,661 --> 00:15:55,455
Well, that does it!
That really does it!
357
00:15:55,496 --> 00:15:57,373
If you'll excuse me,
I have to fix dinner.
358
00:15:57,415 --> 00:15:59,333
Well, don't bother
setting a place for me,
359
00:15:59,375 --> 00:16:00,543
because I'll be eating out.
360
00:16:00,585 --> 00:16:02,086
Good.
More for me.
361
00:16:02,128 --> 00:16:04,464
And don't bother turning down
my side of the bed,
362
00:16:04,505 --> 00:16:06,674
because I'll be
sleeping on the sofa.
363
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:13,097
As long as you're eating out,
why don't you sleep out too.
364
00:16:13,139 --> 00:16:14,390
What?
365
00:16:14,432 --> 00:16:15,975
Sam, this isn't like you.
366
00:16:16,017 --> 00:16:18,227
It is now.
367
00:16:18,269 --> 00:16:20,313
Well, then I'll do
just that.
368
00:16:20,354 --> 00:16:23,107
As of now, my address
is the club.
369
00:16:23,149 --> 00:16:24,817
What do you think of that?
370
00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:27,278
I think I better
call you a cab.
371
00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:29,655
I'll need the car
for shopping.
372
00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:36,746
Louise?
373
00:16:37,914 --> 00:16:39,373
Anybody home?
374
00:16:45,922 --> 00:16:47,798
Hi, dear.
375
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:49,008
I know all about it.
376
00:16:49,050 --> 00:16:50,843
I spoke to Samantha.
377
00:16:50,885 --> 00:16:52,345
Figures.
378
00:16:52,386 --> 00:16:53,804
You know, it's none
of my business,
379
00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:56,432
but I think you're being
stubborn about this whole thing.
380
00:16:56,474 --> 00:16:57,225
I agree.
381
00:16:57,266 --> 00:16:58,434
That you're
being stubborn?
382
00:16:58,476 --> 00:17:00,561
That it's none
of your business.
383
00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:04,106
You got a bicarbonate?
384
00:17:04,148 --> 00:17:05,983
I've got a knot in my stomach.
385
00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:08,653
You've also got one
in your head.
386
00:17:08,694 --> 00:17:11,155
Well, I've got news for you,
tinted top.
387
00:17:11,196 --> 00:17:13,366
I run my business
the way I see fit.
388
00:17:13,407 --> 00:17:17,662
And I don't need any suggestions
from the corset crowd.
389
00:17:17,703 --> 00:17:19,747
Be my guest, Snow White.
390
00:17:21,749 --> 00:17:25,670
And let me drop another thought
on your pointed little ears.
391
00:17:25,711 --> 00:17:27,713
Some men are fortunate enough
to have wives
392
00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:30,550
that are understanding
and sympathetic.
393
00:17:30,590 --> 00:17:32,885
After a hard day
in the rat race,
394
00:17:32,927 --> 00:17:37,056
they don't have to come home
to a mouse that roars.
395
00:17:37,098 --> 00:17:39,725
I believe the last word
is my prerogative.
396
00:17:39,767 --> 00:17:41,519
So I'll take it.
397
00:17:41,561 --> 00:17:45,439
If I were you, I'd crawl
to Darrin on my hands and knees
398
00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:47,650
and beg his forgiveness.
399
00:17:47,692 --> 00:17:48,943
Me, crawl?
400
00:17:48,984 --> 00:17:50,403
Oh, come on, Larry.
401
00:17:50,444 --> 00:17:52,238
We both know
it's his brilliant mind
402
00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:54,198
that made you everything
you are today.
403
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,450
Without him,
you'd be nothing.
404
00:17:56,951 --> 00:17:58,786
Are you serious?
405
00:17:58,828 --> 00:17:59,954
Well, let's face it.
406
00:17:59,996 --> 00:18:01,539
I married you, Larry,
but you're not
407
00:18:01,580 --> 00:18:03,583
the smartest man
in the world.
408
00:18:04,917 --> 00:18:05,917
Louise.
409
00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:07,587
Yes?
410
00:18:07,628 --> 00:18:08,796
Louise.
411
00:18:08,838 --> 00:18:11,632
You want to try for double
or nothing on my last name?
412
00:18:14,844 --> 00:18:17,263
The discussion is at an end.
413
00:18:17,305 --> 00:18:19,307
Fine. I'll get dinner.
414
00:18:19,348 --> 00:18:22,685
Or would you prefer
to eat out?
415
00:18:22,727 --> 00:18:25,186
That's the best idea
you've had in years.
416
00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:26,856
Nag, nag, nag.
417
00:18:26,897 --> 00:18:28,273
Yackety-yak-yak.
418
00:18:28,316 --> 00:18:30,067
Well, if you feel
that way about it,
419
00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:31,152
you'd be better off
420
00:18:31,193 --> 00:18:32,445
where you can't hear
my voice at all.
421
00:18:32,486 --> 00:18:34,363
Louise, you're driving me
to the club.
422
00:18:34,405 --> 00:18:36,741
I don't have time.
423
00:18:36,782 --> 00:18:37,907
Here are your keys.
424
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:39,493
Drive yourself.
425
00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:53,883
Desk.
426
00:18:53,924 --> 00:18:56,302
Could you tell me
if Mr. Darrin Stephens
427
00:18:56,344 --> 00:18:58,596
has checked in yet?
428
00:18:58,638 --> 00:18:59,805
He has.
429
00:18:59,847 --> 00:19:01,599
Ah. What room is he in?
430
00:19:01,641 --> 00:19:02,558
He's in 909.
431
00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:03,976
Would you like me to ring him?
432
00:19:04,018 --> 00:19:06,354
Oh, no.
No, don't bother.
433
00:19:06,395 --> 00:19:10,273
Oh, Mr. Larry Tate
will be arriving very soon.
434
00:19:10,316 --> 00:19:12,859
I'm sure you'll
make him comfortable.
435
00:19:17,782 --> 00:19:20,534
Eddie, can I have
a room for the night?
436
00:19:22,328 --> 00:19:24,455
Yes, sir, Mr. Tate.
Room 909.
437
00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:25,873
I'll ring for a bellboy.
438
00:19:25,915 --> 00:19:27,375
Don't bother.
439
00:21:19,653 --> 00:21:20,446
Larry!
440
00:21:20,488 --> 00:21:21,614
What are you doing here?
441
00:21:21,655 --> 00:21:23,282
I might ask you
the same question.
442
00:21:23,324 --> 00:21:24,407
It's none of your business.
443
00:21:24,450 --> 00:21:26,243
Obviously they got
our rooms mixed up.
444
00:21:26,243 --> 00:21:27,578
I'll get another one.
445
00:21:27,619 --> 00:21:29,288
Don't tell me you had
a fight with Louise.
446
00:21:29,330 --> 00:21:30,748
That's my business.
447
00:21:30,790 --> 00:21:32,500
I suppose you had
a fight with Samantha.
448
00:21:32,541 --> 00:21:33,751
That's my business!
449
00:21:33,792 --> 00:21:35,419
What's the matter
with you, Larry?
450
00:21:35,461 --> 00:21:37,463
How could you walk out
on a great girl like Louise?
451
00:21:37,505 --> 00:21:39,423
And how could you run out
on a marvelous girl
452
00:21:39,465 --> 00:21:40,508
like Samantha?
453
00:21:40,549 --> 00:21:42,843
I thought you didn't
like Samantha.
454
00:21:42,885 --> 00:21:44,428
I thought you didn't
like Louise.
455
00:21:44,470 --> 00:21:46,597
What gave you that idea?
Your big mouth.
456
00:21:46,638 --> 00:21:47,973
I only said those things
in anger.
457
00:21:48,015 --> 00:21:49,642
You should've
known that. So did I.
458
00:21:49,683 --> 00:21:51,185
And if you weren't
so thick-headed,
459
00:21:51,227 --> 00:21:53,145
you'd know I'm crazy
about Sam.
460
00:21:56,023 --> 00:21:58,984
Larry, we're a couple
of numskulls.
461
00:22:00,109 --> 00:22:01,529
You said it.
462
00:22:03,405 --> 00:22:04,865
I'm sorry, Lar--
I'm sorry--
463
00:22:08,702 --> 00:22:10,788
Well, now we can enjoy
464
00:22:10,830 --> 00:22:12,873
our newfound
bachelorhood together.
465
00:22:12,915 --> 00:22:14,124
Right.
466
00:22:14,166 --> 00:22:16,669
Ah, freedom!
It's wonderful!
467
00:22:16,710 --> 00:22:17,878
EJit's marvelous!
468
00:22:17,920 --> 00:22:19,046
Do anything we want.
469
00:22:19,088 --> 00:22:20,381
No one to answer to.
470
00:22:20,422 --> 00:22:22,340
Play poker.
Go bowling.
471
00:22:22,383 --> 00:22:23,467
Golf every weekend.
472
00:22:23,509 --> 00:22:24,760
More time at the club.
473
00:22:24,802 --> 00:22:25,719
Yeah.
474
00:22:30,724 --> 00:22:34,186
I hate poker
and bowling.
475
00:22:34,228 --> 00:22:36,605
Golf gives me the hives.
476
00:22:36,647 --> 00:22:38,440
This place is depressing.
477
00:22:43,904 --> 00:22:45,030
Darrin?
478
00:22:45,990 --> 00:22:47,157
Yeah?
479
00:22:48,993 --> 00:22:51,078
Are you thinking
what I'm thinking?
480
00:22:52,204 --> 00:22:53,955
I think so.
481
00:22:53,998 --> 00:22:57,251
Last one packed
pays for the room!
482
00:23:03,883 --> 00:23:05,759
Wouldn't you know it.
Louise's car.
483
00:23:05,801 --> 00:23:07,136
Figures.
484
00:23:07,177 --> 00:23:08,137
She was miserable
at home without me.
485
00:23:08,178 --> 00:23:09,847
Poor kids.
Hm.
486
00:23:09,888 --> 00:23:11,557
Must be crying
on each other's shoulders.
487
00:23:13,976 --> 00:23:14,977
Oh, thanks,
Larry.
488
00:23:15,019 --> 00:23:16,520
You're welcome.
489
00:23:18,981 --> 00:23:20,648
Well, look who's back.
490
00:23:20,691 --> 00:23:23,569
The freedom fighters.
491
00:23:23,611 --> 00:23:24,862
Have some champagne.
492
00:23:24,904 --> 00:23:26,155
We're celebrating.
493
00:23:26,196 --> 00:23:28,157
Louise, we're going home.
494
00:23:28,198 --> 00:23:29,532
Oh, really, Larry.
495
00:23:29,575 --> 00:23:30,659
Louise.
496
00:23:30,701 --> 00:23:33,871
Tsk.
Nag, nag, nag.
497
00:23:33,913 --> 00:23:35,205
Louise...
Yeah.
498
00:23:35,247 --> 00:23:36,707
Don't forget
your Ouija board.
499
00:23:36,749 --> 00:23:38,542
Wasn't that fun?
Fascinating.
500
00:23:38,584 --> 00:23:40,002
Good night, Samantha.
501
00:23:41,587 --> 00:23:42,254
Night, Darrin.
502
00:23:42,296 --> 00:23:43,422
Night, Larry.
Louise.
503
00:23:43,464 --> 00:23:45,465
Night, Samantha.
Night, Larry.
504
00:23:50,638 --> 00:23:54,725
Did I just detect a sly smile
on your upper lip?
505
00:23:54,767 --> 00:23:55,684
Smile?
506
00:23:55,726 --> 00:23:56,894
It suddenly occurs
to me
507
00:23:56,936 --> 00:23:58,270
that it's more than
coincidence
508
00:23:58,311 --> 00:24:00,314
that Larry and I left
our houses at the same time
509
00:24:00,356 --> 00:24:01,440
and ended up
in the same room.
510
00:24:01,482 --> 00:24:03,859
Stranger things
have happened.
511
00:24:03,901 --> 00:24:05,486
Especially
in this house.
512
00:24:05,527 --> 00:24:07,112
And I'll tell you
something else.
513
00:24:07,154 --> 00:24:10,950
If you've been meddling
with your witchcraft again...
514
00:24:10,991 --> 00:24:12,409
I couldn't care less.
515
00:24:12,409 --> 00:24:14,328
Now, let me
tell you something.
516
00:24:14,369 --> 00:24:17,247
If you think you can
walk back through that door
517
00:24:17,289 --> 00:24:18,749
and all is forgiven,
518
00:24:18,791 --> 00:24:21,210
you're absolutely... right.
519
00:24:24,797 --> 00:24:27,758
Sam, isn't it amazing
how stupid a man can be?
520
00:24:29,385 --> 00:24:30,260
Oh, yes.
521
00:24:30,302 --> 00:24:32,054
You certainly were,
sweetheart.
522
00:24:32,096 --> 00:24:33,806
I meant Larry.
35993
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