All language subtitles for Co_Ed_Confidential_S02E09_720p_HDTV_TVV_30NAMA

You know, college life.

Let go and have fun.

Single and ready to mingle. Yeah!

Didn't I have them on my one -fuck -no
-questions -ask list?

Take me to bed right now.

My love can really burn you.

Touch of the beat.

Am I not enough for you?

What are you watching? Anything juicy?

You Americans, it's all ties about sex.

La la.

I gotta switch majors.

I would like to thank the liquor store
for the screw -off cap champagne.

Bravo.

And I would also like to thank the
Sprocket Awards for their absolutely

pompous show that just serves to prove
that art simply has to be a reward

its own.

And lastly, I would like to thank you
for being you.

Yeah,

in the category of being Larry.

Uh, kind of would have been a crime if I
hadn't won.

Yeah, it was close. You got a sympathy
vote.

Hmm. Sad sack wins by default.

Hmm. Fuck them if they can't take a
joke.

You know, if I'd have won that Sprocket
Award... I know.

You wouldn't be here right now.

Well,

thank God I didn't win.

Because if there's a next time,

well, if there is a next time, I'm going
to thank my muse, my real inspiration,

my real everything.

You.

It's always been you.

The way I feel, what a place to be, I'd
rather be here.

You never want to come down.

Hey, you want to see me fly?

Better write this down.

Gonna paint the walls, see the big
picture.

I better spend it now than to save it
for some rainy day.

And even under all that, where we might
have taken,

still no other face would rather be
there.

I never want to see you down.

Ever feel like crying.

I better write this down.

Gonna wait for more. See the bigger
picture.

I better spend it now.

never want to come

What does it look like? Wasting your
time? There's a talent agent waiting to

speak to you outside.

He saw our film in the festival and said
it was the shit. The absolute shit.

He wants to sign us and take us all the
way to the top.

We are going to be rolling in shit.

If you screw this up, you're screwing up
your whole future.

What do I... Is this...

Congratulations.

Man, now that's what I want to wake up
to every morning.

Cooper, I thought you were... What do
you mean every morning?

I mean, if I knew I could catch a
glimpse of that fine ass every morning,

set my alarm an hour early just so I
wouldn't miss it.

Don't get any ideas.

Oh, let me guess. Not ready for a
commitment, right?

I told you I'm not ready to be in
another relationship.

Especially after what Freddie did with
that.

You know.

What about you and Emmanuel?

We're... I don't know what we are.

It's a technical term.

But I like to call it Velvet Sausage
Wall Enthusiast. What?

Forget it.

Look, all I'm saying is... Little
Brother Chance.

Okay, we'll see.

Where is Emmanuel anyway?

I haven't seen it since... I think it
was page 32 of the conversation.

How am I going to tell her the truth
now?

I've been lying about being French for
so long.

She's never going to forgive me.

Karen deserves to know, yes?

You ever been caught in a lie?

The INS, they tried to catch me all the
time.

She's going to kick me out of the house,
and they're going to kick me out of

college.

Then do not tell her.

I have to.

You were right.

She deserves to know.

My English is...

Not so good.

Maybe you should not take advice from
me.

You're smarter than you know.

Where are you?

Where are you?

Don't worry about him. He's just burying
a bone.

He is a legend for burying his bone,
yes?

A legend in his own tiny mind.

Are you?

Look at the ring.

Enough now, James. The ring's long gone.

If I can dig down to the main drain,
there might be a chance.

You ever think... I try not to.

Thanks. Thanks for that. No, I
appreciate it.

You ever think that things happen for a
reason, like this wasn't meant to be?

What, do you believe that?

I don't know. I do believe in destiny.

What, so our love just went down the
drain?

You can't fuck with destiny.

Yeah. Well, destiny is fucking with me.

Ring that fucking ring and...

Are you trying to

kill me? For years.

are you here? Honey, can't a mother show
an interest in her son's life?

No, you don't, and you can't.

Fine, I'm here for the house.

Oh, for my dead body.

With pleasure.

What in the hell is going on here?

Oh, we settled the divorce.

Well, thank Christ.

Still doesn't explain why you washed up
here.

Oh, there's one problem. This place. I
want it so to fuck nuts, and he won't

sign the papers until I give up the
rights.

So? Where does that leave me?

So where does that leave me?

She signs the divorce papers. The place
is all yours.

She'll never do that.

I don't even need a signature.

The judge said if she was too drunk to
sign, all I needed was a thumbprint.

I'm not going to let that wig win.

I'll tear this place down brick by
brick.

It won't have to come to that.

What is that?

Kedden, I have to talk to you. We've got
a huge problem.

Cooper, tell us the truth.

All right, guys, here's the deal.
Neither one of the parental units wants

sign the divorce papers unless one of
them gets their hands on the house. They

don't even want the house. They just
don't want one or the other to get it.

Well, what are we supposed to do, huh?

Let them take a chainsaw to this place
and cut it in two?

Nice try, Solomon, but no. We're getting
them to sign those papers one way or

another.

James, I need you to take my dad down to
the strip club.

Yeah.

What's his problem? He loves strip
clubs.

Destiny fucked him in the hole.

Anywho, you take him to the strip club
and get him lap dances up the wazoo.

Sorry, just keep him occupied while
Larry slips in and gets him to sign the

papers while he's not even paying
attention.

Yeah, yeah.

What about my mother?

You put a pen near her, she's likely to
stab you with it. All we need is a

fingerprint. So we just get her drunk
and presto, we've got it.

Not possible. She's 90 proof when she's
sober. We're talking pickle.

That's where our secret weapon comes in.

Mm -mm.

She almost broke me last time. Oh, come
on, Guillermo. Take one for the team.

Look, you just keep her busy, and
Emmanuel and I will slip in and get it

she's passed out.

Let's be careful out there, guys.

Kedden, I have to tell you something.

Not right now. We've got dirty work to
do.

That's my picture.

Don't you... You want it now, pygmy
cock?

That's it.

Think I care about that in a neck wig?
Smash it.

I know something you will care about.

and you get some air.

And you, you need to go to the pool
house. Your lawyer's there. He wants to

to you.

I'll rip a can of smashed assholes right
out of you.

I'll smash you.

He needs labbing.

Up the wazoo.

Please.

Dude, don't be bummed.

Sorry, wrong word.

Where's Ciara at?

Shouldn't she be here helping you or
something?

Ciara's mad at me.

Sophie's back on the scene.

After all I did to get you two together?

Snagging the tickets to the awards?

Getting you naked in the dean's office?

I was meaning to ask you. You toolbox.
All you had to do was close the deal.

Right, but now we have to get these
divorce papers signed or we're going to

kicked out of the house.

All of us.

Well, well, well. If it isn't my little
chimichanga.

Thank you.

What are you doing over here?

INS after your cute little ass again?

Karen. She helped me get a passport.

Cortez is going traveling.

I... I want to see the world.

Well...

Why don't you start by going down?

Down.

Are you doing something wrong here, or
are you just below the waist?

I don't know, I'm just thinking, you
know, like, you ever think, like, things

happen for a reason?

Like, if people are meant to be
together, then they'll be together?

Um, yeah.

My girlfriend lost the engagement ring I
gave her.

Oh, do you think that's a sign?

Isn't it?

Those people, even that kind of thing,
maybe the world's trying to tell you

something.

Maybe the world's trying to tell you how
much you really love this girl.

Like a test?

If you're meant to be together, you'll
make it happen.

Yeah.

Sir?

Can you sign for credit card?

Yeah.

You're right.

Destiny. My name's Destiny.

No, you're right.

Thank you.

I'm out of here, Larry.

Good luck getting that sucker to sign
those papers.

Ow!

Insert lame excuse here.

Thank you.

Thank you.

What a guy.

He does this for you?

No, I wish.

We never consummated the marriage.

No, I mean that he does this because he
cares about you.

Yeah, I'm going to miss him when you
leave.

Me too.

Ew, she's really flexible for her age.

Kevin, there is something that I need to
talk to you about.

Come on, keep her drinking.

Mr. Tagli?

I thought it'd never end.

Well, she's got stamina. I'll give her
that much.

I... I lied to you.

Okay.

I...

Bisexual.

That's it?

No problem. Whatever floats your boat or
helps you find your remote.

And... I'm not French.

Oh, that's fine. I've been with... Your
what?

I lied about it. To get the foreign
exchange scholarship.

And Cooper found out.

My name's not Emmanuel.

It's Emily.

What the hell?

Nice try.

Takes more than a little sippy, sippy,
bouncy, bouncy to pull one over on me.

Baby, how come...

your back destiny sent me here so you do
believe in destiny oh

yes i do and she's got a hell of a rack

It's easy not to say you're sorry, but
what I don't know is if I should care.

A youth's observation is leaving me
nowhere.

Screaming in the front yard while the
neighborhood stares. You take a shot at

the dog running to the backyard. Take
the truck out, take the truck out.

I don't mind what you say.

I'll never give a shit about you anyway.

I don't care what you do.

As long as it's the end of me and you.

about your quote -unquote fantasy
another useless observation and leaving

nowhere

Me and you.

And me and you.

And tough and tiredness.

Your happiness is overrated.

And tough and tiredness.

We will?

Oh, yeah. I spoke to your agent. I knew
you would screw things up.

You did?

Mm -hmm. I would?

Oh, yeah.

Whoa!

I'm so sorry.

Me too.

For what?

For lying to me?

We're not telling the truth.

It doesn't matter anymore anyways.

It's over now.

It doesn't have to be. Well, we lost the
house, so... So what?

We could get a new place.

We're good roommates, aren't we?

With benefits.

That was the worst French accent I've
ever heard.

I don't know. It was good enough to fool
you.

And I've never even been to Paris,
Texas.

Sneaky little shits. There's not enough
booze in this town to make me a stupid

drunk. And I've never seen a pair of
tits that could throw me off my game.

Well, take one last look around, because
tomorrow this place is going to be

rubble.

With you under it.

Let's go tell Karen the bad news.

Oh, I'm looking forward to this.

Wrong room, pal!

Wrong

room!

But take me with you!

Is Karen here, Karen?

No. Now's not the time.

Let him keep down.

You know, I lied before.

I have seen a pair of tits that take my
breath away.

Well, you bought them.

And they were the nicest gift you ever
gave me.

and everything you do.

My God, they're gone, they're gone. Your
parents are fucking nuts.

That's where we see nothing.

Everyone's flat.

Do you hear that rattling?

It's an old war room, baby. Don't worry
about it.

No, it's coming from that shower head.

Are you serious?

What are you doing?

Amazing kiss.

I love these.

What? Can I be serious?

Holy shit.

and wants me to help it when she's away.
What do you say? Come with? Leave the

house? The lover?

Cut!

I don't remember there being this much
sex in classic noir.

That's what's wrong with those movies.

This is awkward. I'm interrupting.

She's never ever, never ever better than
me.

She's never ever, never ever better than
me.

She's...

Ever better than me.