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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,580 --> 00:00:04,019 is where we'll be staying. Just like we're all going to be roommates. 2 00:00:04,560 --> 00:00:05,560 Yes. 3 00:00:06,940 --> 00:00:09,580 We're free to do what we want, when we want, to who we want. 4 00:00:10,120 --> 00:00:11,440 You're an incredible asshole. 5 00:00:12,180 --> 00:00:13,180 Fucking love car. 6 00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:15,300 Is this guy for real? 7 00:00:17,520 --> 00:00:18,520 Oh, yeah. 8 00:00:18,740 --> 00:00:21,100 Who's your daddy? Ryan Talbert. Why? 9 00:00:21,880 --> 00:00:24,120 I want a good education. 10 00:00:24,560 --> 00:00:25,880 What are you talking about? 11 00:00:36,430 --> 00:00:38,570 Testing. Testing. Is this thing on? 12 00:00:38,950 --> 00:00:39,950 Oh. 13 00:00:42,810 --> 00:00:44,150 All right. 14 00:00:44,570 --> 00:00:45,570 Scene one. 15 00:00:45,970 --> 00:00:46,970 Forks toward the zero. 16 00:00:50,190 --> 00:00:51,190 And action. 17 00:00:53,950 --> 00:00:57,070 Can you believe the heat? 18 00:00:57,770 --> 00:00:58,770 Oh, my dear. 19 00:00:59,670 --> 00:01:02,150 It's only going to get hotter. 20 00:01:02,950 --> 00:01:04,010 Say that again. 21 00:01:07,470 --> 00:01:08,470 What? 22 00:01:10,410 --> 00:01:15,410 Jesus Christ, Freddie, we've done this scene like 500 times. 23 00:01:16,530 --> 00:01:20,130 Are you able to do this or not? Yes, yes, we're going to do it, okay? Just 24 00:01:20,130 --> 00:01:20,949 on going. 25 00:01:20,950 --> 00:01:22,450 We'll fix it in editing. Fix it in editing. 26 00:01:22,830 --> 00:01:25,350 Yeah, fix it in editing. Fine. Where were we? Where were we? 27 00:01:25,710 --> 00:01:27,150 Jesus. Here, okay. 28 00:01:27,410 --> 00:01:28,410 Okay. 29 00:01:30,470 --> 00:01:31,470 Hot. 30 00:01:32,930 --> 00:01:33,930 And wet. 31 00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:02,940 Before it's off the ground? Mm -hmm, mm -hmm. 32 00:04:03,180 --> 00:04:05,280 The ship leaving dock before the anchor's pulled? 33 00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:10,300 Yeah. Freddie, why don't you just say it? You ejaculated before your penis 34 00:04:10,300 --> 00:04:12,280 entered my body. 35 00:04:13,640 --> 00:04:16,720 Jesus Christ. Well, I guess there's not going to be a take two then, huh? 36 00:04:17,300 --> 00:04:18,300 Sorry. 37 00:04:18,959 --> 00:04:24,860 You have reached James itself. I'm definitely preoccupied. Please leave a 38 00:04:24,860 --> 00:04:25,860 message at the beep. 39 00:04:26,180 --> 00:04:27,220 Listen, James. 40 00:04:30,020 --> 00:04:31,080 Let's read some things. 41 00:05:06,950 --> 00:05:07,609 You're a free man. 42 00:05:07,610 --> 00:05:09,670 You can do whatever it is that makes you happy. 43 00:05:11,050 --> 00:05:14,350 But... Just not with me. 44 00:05:54,960 --> 00:05:55,960 With all the benefits. 45 00:05:56,520 --> 00:05:57,520 And then some. 46 00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:28,400 has to be limit. 47 00:06:30,340 --> 00:06:32,400 James, call me back. 48 00:06:39,380 --> 00:06:43,220 So, can I ask you a question? 49 00:06:43,700 --> 00:06:47,180 You got a twin? 50 00:06:48,520 --> 00:06:50,140 A hot friend? 51 00:06:52,460 --> 00:06:56,040 Maybe a slightly damaged roommate who's open to experimenting? 52 00:07:07,560 --> 00:07:08,600 No, him. 53 00:07:09,320 --> 00:07:11,020 I was speaking figuratively. 54 00:07:11,480 --> 00:07:12,620 I see the movie. 55 00:07:13,100 --> 00:07:16,860 Figurative with Harrison Ford and Bang Bang. 56 00:07:17,360 --> 00:07:18,360 You know? 57 00:07:24,520 --> 00:07:25,600 Oh, hey, girl. 58 00:07:28,020 --> 00:07:30,500 Oh, wait up. I can explain. 59 00:07:31,540 --> 00:07:32,640 She's in the kitchen. 60 00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:33,920 Thank you. 61 00:07:42,370 --> 00:07:44,330 Uh, it wasn't what it looked like. 62 00:07:45,290 --> 00:07:49,610 Well, it looked a lot like you getting head from some bimbo who should know 63 00:07:49,610 --> 00:07:53,190 better. Okay, I guess it was what it looked like, all right? But I don't know 64 00:07:53,190 --> 00:07:55,810 why you're so upset. I mean, you dumped me, remember? 65 00:07:56,430 --> 00:07:57,730 You're an incredible asshole. 66 00:07:59,330 --> 00:08:01,230 Well, I'll take that as a compliment. 67 00:08:01,490 --> 00:08:02,490 It isn't. 68 00:08:12,300 --> 00:08:13,300 What? 69 00:08:17,660 --> 00:08:18,660 I got nothing. 70 00:08:19,220 --> 00:08:20,860 Look, okay, okay, okay. Look, look. 71 00:08:21,240 --> 00:08:24,100 I care about you, okay? I don't want to hurt you. 72 00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:33,600 I love being fucked, but... Look, that's just friends 73 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:34,339 with benefits. 74 00:08:34,340 --> 00:08:37,020 You just don't get it, do you? 75 00:08:46,250 --> 00:08:47,250 We were broken up. 76 00:08:48,130 --> 00:08:49,250 What's the fucking big deal? 77 00:08:49,490 --> 00:08:50,490 Whoa, hey. 78 00:08:51,970 --> 00:08:52,970 Ophelia? 79 00:09:01,110 --> 00:09:02,110 Ophelia? 80 00:09:07,910 --> 00:09:09,490 You don't have to dress up for me. 81 00:09:09,690 --> 00:09:11,110 I'm not mad at you or anything. 82 00:09:11,470 --> 00:09:12,950 Oh, believe me, it's not for you. 83 00:09:13,400 --> 00:09:16,960 Oh, yeah, that's right. I forgot. You like to dress up for yourself, huh? 84 00:09:17,260 --> 00:09:19,720 Oh, you still got that sexy little nurse's uniform or what? 85 00:09:20,040 --> 00:09:22,480 You know what, James? You're not the only one who can mess around. 86 00:09:22,800 --> 00:09:25,900 I've had my fair share of offers. Believe you and me. Oh, really? 87 00:09:26,700 --> 00:09:27,700 Yeah. 88 00:09:27,820 --> 00:09:28,820 Like who? 89 00:09:28,940 --> 00:09:31,980 You remember Carl, that really cute freshman? 90 00:09:32,240 --> 00:09:36,780 He asked me out on a date. I think we both know that that guy's camper than a 91 00:09:36,780 --> 00:09:38,300 row of pink tents, okay? 92 00:09:39,160 --> 00:09:40,160 All right. 93 00:09:41,020 --> 00:09:42,020 Gary. 94 00:09:42,280 --> 00:09:44,940 He gave me his number. Oh, was it three inches? 95 00:09:49,040 --> 00:09:50,040 Jeb. Oh. 96 00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:53,740 Oh, really? 97 00:09:54,020 --> 00:09:55,020 Wow. 98 00:09:55,780 --> 00:09:57,540 Wow. Jeb asked you out, huh? 99 00:09:59,360 --> 00:10:01,980 My old frat buddy had the balls to ask you out, huh? 100 00:10:02,580 --> 00:10:03,580 Sure did. 101 00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:07,020 And now it looks like I'll be making a move on his books. 102 00:10:20,110 --> 00:10:21,110 Let me guess. 103 00:10:21,390 --> 00:10:23,110 Feeling guilty about James? 104 00:10:23,870 --> 00:10:25,410 No, no, not at all. 105 00:10:29,790 --> 00:10:30,870 Maybe just a bit. 106 00:10:35,950 --> 00:10:38,270 I mean, he's a boy. 107 00:10:38,750 --> 00:10:40,090 He fucks other girls. 108 00:10:40,410 --> 00:10:41,950 Why put it down to immaturity? 109 00:10:42,550 --> 00:10:43,550 Sounds about right. 110 00:10:45,110 --> 00:10:47,830 Aren't you supposed to be trying to get me to fuck you? 111 00:10:48,090 --> 00:10:50,260 Sure, but... James is a hell of a guy. 112 00:10:55,540 --> 00:10:58,220 My body so wants to fuck you. 113 00:10:58,600 --> 00:11:05,180 But my heart... Well... 114 00:11:05,180 --> 00:11:08,120 Full of love for James. 115 00:11:08,580 --> 00:11:09,580 I can feel. 116 00:11:10,780 --> 00:11:12,100 Love is a strong word. 117 00:11:19,440 --> 00:11:21,020 Let's not talk about James anymore. 118 00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:22,280 Okay. 119 00:11:22,680 --> 00:11:24,040 Let's not talk about anything. 120 00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:26,540 Talk is overrated. 121 00:11:53,320 --> 00:11:54,320 See ya. 122 00:13:36,780 --> 00:13:40,760 Yeah, yeah, exactly. Oh, so you were in love with the exchange student. 123 00:13:41,460 --> 00:13:44,060 You guys, did you share a real deep spiritual connection? 124 00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:47,400 You know, even though you could only communicate with hand signals. Okay, 125 00:13:47,460 --> 00:13:50,260 okay, stop trying to change the subject, okay? I don't give a fuck about that 126 00:13:50,260 --> 00:13:52,500 girl. Okay, their sex didn't even feel good, really. 127 00:13:52,740 --> 00:13:55,640 Aw, poor you. What was wrong? She didn't swallow. Hey. 128 00:13:58,220 --> 00:14:00,120 It didn't feel good because it wasn't you, baby. 129 00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:47,859 I like it. 130 00:16:47,860 --> 00:16:49,440 You're amazing. So what's up? 131 00:16:49,780 --> 00:16:51,100 I have to find my video camera. 132 00:16:52,300 --> 00:16:54,760 I've been interviewed with Professor Lasky and Aaron tonight. 133 00:16:55,420 --> 00:16:59,420 If I don't find it, then... I think I saw it in Freddie's room. 134 00:16:59,680 --> 00:17:00,599 You should look there. 135 00:17:00,600 --> 00:17:01,780 And stay out, you pig! 136 00:17:05,339 --> 00:17:06,339 Hey, guys. 137 00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:09,000 Ooh. God, are you going to eat that? Thank you. 138 00:17:11,619 --> 00:17:12,619 No. 139 00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:20,460 Fuck dude, that's your plate good. 140 00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:23,560 You're gonna make someone a hell of a wife one day, bro 141 00:18:11,790 --> 00:18:14,010 Sorry. I thought it was the pig. 142 00:18:20,290 --> 00:18:21,290 What happened? 143 00:18:21,970 --> 00:18:23,090 I'm becoming a lesbian. 144 00:18:23,850 --> 00:18:25,550 A homicidal lesbian? 145 00:18:26,330 --> 00:18:28,570 Yeah, sure. I like the sound of that. 146 00:18:29,090 --> 00:18:30,510 If you've got a cock, you're dead. 147 00:18:31,430 --> 00:18:35,690 Hmm. A radical manifesto. But hey, you've got my vote. 148 00:18:36,130 --> 00:18:40,610 Sometimes. It depends on who the cock is attached to and how he uses it and 149 00:18:40,610 --> 00:18:44,430 whether... You know what? Forget it. Why should I go to jail for that pig? 150 00:18:45,530 --> 00:18:47,570 I'm assuming we're talking about James. 151 00:18:51,430 --> 00:18:57,090 The pig thinks it's a biological necessity to have a threesome. He says 152 00:18:57,090 --> 00:18:59,390 doubles the chances of survival for the human race. 153 00:18:59,630 --> 00:19:01,650 It's his dirty Darwinian theory. 154 00:19:07,180 --> 00:19:10,580 He gave me this as a present. Can you believe that? 155 00:19:11,800 --> 00:19:14,300 The day he gave me a picture of himself? 156 00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:18,380 God, I should have known what an egocentric asshole he is. 157 00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:26,800 Wow. I feel better. 158 00:19:30,540 --> 00:19:32,120 You let me down big time. 159 00:19:33,140 --> 00:19:34,700 What else is this stuff in here? 160 00:19:55,810 --> 00:19:56,910 Freddie, Freddie. 161 00:19:59,570 --> 00:20:03,510 Hey, take it easy. And a little Barry White for your threesome. 162 00:20:03,870 --> 00:20:04,870 Oh, wait. 163 00:20:06,050 --> 00:20:07,630 Celia, that was her stereo. 164 00:20:09,430 --> 00:20:10,430 Shit. 165 00:20:16,530 --> 00:20:19,990 I know I haven't been here very long, but I know. 166 00:20:21,020 --> 00:20:24,500 You're going to tell me that the pig and I are clearly not meant to be together. 167 00:20:25,800 --> 00:20:28,320 I mean, clearly, all we do is make each other unhappy. 168 00:20:28,620 --> 00:20:30,500 We should just break up and be done. 169 00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:33,420 No, actually, just the opposite. 170 00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:36,840 I've never seen two people who love each other so much. 171 00:20:37,060 --> 00:20:41,920 And I've had many, many, many boyfriends, but none that I even cared 172 00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:44,500 about to fight with or even be angry with. 173 00:20:45,060 --> 00:20:48,340 If they pissed me off, I always had someone on speed dial. 174 00:20:50,960 --> 00:20:52,300 So what am I supposed to do? 175 00:20:53,760 --> 00:20:56,840 Well, did you ever think about giving him what he wants? 176 00:21:01,540 --> 00:21:03,180 The condemned gets a final meal, right? 177 00:21:06,440 --> 00:21:09,380 What happened this time? 178 00:21:10,780 --> 00:21:14,860 Chicks. That's what happened. Chicks. You can't live with them. 179 00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:18,340 You just can't live with them. 180 00:21:18,540 --> 00:21:19,540 That's all. 181 00:21:19,760 --> 00:21:21,700 Well, you two sounded like you were getting on pretty well. 182 00:21:22,300 --> 00:21:23,840 Yeah, for seven straight hours. 183 00:21:25,700 --> 00:21:27,200 Listen to me, son. Listen to me. 184 00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:30,060 You know what this is. 185 00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:36,440 Yeah, take a look. It's her anniversary gift to me. 186 00:21:38,440 --> 00:21:40,220 It's lovely. 187 00:21:41,320 --> 00:21:43,980 It's a fucking bear trap is what it is. 188 00:21:52,170 --> 00:21:53,170 Could be useful, though. 189 00:21:56,390 --> 00:21:57,710 Yeah, could be useful. 190 00:22:03,570 --> 00:22:04,570 Useful? 191 00:22:04,890 --> 00:22:06,370 Still a fucking bear trap. 192 00:22:07,190 --> 00:22:08,770 What are you talking about, man? 193 00:22:09,750 --> 00:22:10,750 Listen to me. 194 00:22:11,610 --> 00:22:14,730 Pussy is nature's bear trap. 195 00:22:15,390 --> 00:22:19,870 Okay? We're out looking for a quick snack, and then snap! 196 00:22:20,230 --> 00:22:21,410 We stick in our paw, 197 00:22:22,209 --> 00:22:23,209 She's got you. 198 00:22:26,090 --> 00:22:27,110 That sounds painful. 199 00:22:28,250 --> 00:22:29,250 Two words for you. 200 00:22:30,110 --> 00:22:34,850 New to Cole. Well, if it's really that bad, and knowing Ophelia, I highly doubt 201 00:22:34,850 --> 00:22:37,890 it, just do the right thing. Break up with her. 202 00:22:38,210 --> 00:22:39,210 Once and for all. 203 00:22:41,410 --> 00:22:42,410 Dude. 204 00:22:43,150 --> 00:22:45,790 You're like a fucking genius. 205 00:22:46,530 --> 00:22:48,030 Dude, I mean it. Like, um... 206 00:22:48,410 --> 00:22:51,490 Like a Latin Stephen Hawking without the motorized wheelchair. 207 00:22:52,430 --> 00:22:58,810 But I'm going to rip my paw out of that pussy trap. 208 00:23:41,070 --> 00:23:42,370 You got so much explaining to do. 209 00:23:44,450 --> 00:23:45,450 Ophelia! 210 00:23:51,870 --> 00:23:53,350 I've been a bad girl. 211 00:23:54,110 --> 00:23:57,170 I think I need to be punished. 212 00:23:59,330 --> 00:24:00,330 You're right. 213 00:24:01,350 --> 00:24:02,550 I'm calling the cops. 214 00:24:04,630 --> 00:24:07,670 Isn't there anything I can do to get you to drop the charges? 215 00:24:20,520 --> 00:24:21,520 Here's the law. 216 00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:24,680 Better men than I wrote the Constitution, okay? 217 00:24:25,580 --> 00:24:27,300 There are no better men than you. 218 00:24:32,020 --> 00:24:33,020 Oh, God. 219 00:24:33,960 --> 00:24:36,720 Yeah, that's the spot. No, no, no. 220 00:24:36,980 --> 00:24:38,360 What, did I scratch you? No. 221 00:24:38,820 --> 00:24:41,020 I can if you want me to. No, no. 222 00:24:41,620 --> 00:24:42,559 Listen to me. 223 00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:44,740 I came here for one reason. 224 00:24:45,780 --> 00:24:46,780 One reason only. 225 00:24:47,540 --> 00:24:48,519 I know. 226 00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:49,520 You do. 227 00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:00,440 Okay, two reasons. Two reasons. 228 00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:09,300 First... God damn, you're a sexy bitch. 229 00:25:11,780 --> 00:25:16,860 Second... Jose said your pussy's a bear trap and I should bite my own hand off 230 00:25:16,860 --> 00:25:17,860 to get away. Okay? 231 00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:19,780 There. He said what? 232 00:25:20,120 --> 00:25:22,460 Look, dude, it's like fucking Stephen Hawking, okay? 233 00:25:22,720 --> 00:25:24,560 Only more misogynistic. 234 00:25:24,840 --> 00:25:25,840 Well, what did you say? 235 00:25:28,590 --> 00:25:31,410 You know what, James? If you want to get away, you can go any time. 236 00:25:32,670 --> 00:25:33,670 Fuck you. 237 00:25:34,170 --> 00:25:36,230 Fuck you and the horse you rode in on. 238 00:25:45,890 --> 00:25:49,110 This is the last time. I'm so fucking blue. 239 00:25:55,720 --> 00:25:58,240 I've been doing some research. Oh, yeah, I bet you have. 240 00:25:59,020 --> 00:26:03,940 It turns out that it actually is a biological necessity to have a 241 00:26:04,140 --> 00:26:08,220 Really? In fact, mountain gorillas in Bornea do it all the time. 242 00:26:08,860 --> 00:26:11,100 Was I right, or was I right? 243 00:26:11,820 --> 00:26:13,080 More right than you think. 244 00:26:14,100 --> 00:26:15,500 Hmm? Hmm. 245 00:26:16,400 --> 00:26:17,400 What do you mean? 246 00:26:18,420 --> 00:26:19,420 Hmm. 247 00:26:20,060 --> 00:26:21,440 No cameras, right? 248 00:26:42,139 --> 00:26:44,120 Are you sure about the no camera thing? 249 00:29:07,880 --> 00:29:12,900 class is tougher than it looks hey hey it's gonna be all right 250 00:29:12,900 --> 00:29:19,240 you're amazing jose you're so supportive and 251 00:29:19,240 --> 00:29:24,040 understanding if only i can find a boyfriend like you 252 00:29:24,040 --> 00:29:26,960 what time is it 253 00:29:37,960 --> 00:29:39,900 You smell like he'd piss on you afterwards. 254 00:29:40,200 --> 00:29:41,240 Man, it's a conspiracy. 255 00:29:41,820 --> 00:29:42,980 They're all out to get me. 256 00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:44,540 No one's out to get you, Freddie. 257 00:29:45,100 --> 00:29:46,620 We'd never do anything to hurt you. 258 00:29:46,940 --> 00:29:49,860 Yeah? Well, what are we watching? Who are all these people, man? 259 00:29:50,320 --> 00:29:54,420 This is Lisa's journalism class, and her interview is on TV. 260 00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:56,320 Oh, TV, what to do? 261 00:29:56,720 --> 00:29:58,160 This is important, Freddie. 262 00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:38,100 From the main office Is this being broadcast? 263 00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:40,080 On campus TV 264 00:31:08,680 --> 00:31:12,000 I give myself to the man. How about a private dance? That's a really, really 265 00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:13,240 nice dance. I've got to go and call Sue. 266 00:31:16,780 --> 00:31:19,280 Hey, tell Sue that there's going to be a test afterwards. 267 00:31:22,920 --> 00:31:26,600 She's never, ever, never, ever better than me. 268 00:31:28,120 --> 00:31:31,980 She's never, ever, never, ever better than me. 269 00:31:33,480 --> 00:31:36,380 She's never, ever, ever better than... 18355