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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:12,313 --> 00:00:13,281 MAN: This--this is something, man. 2 00:00:13,381 --> 00:00:14,915 This is our generation, man. 3 00:00:15,015 --> 00:00:17,718 All you people, we're all together, man, it's groovy. 4 00:00:17,818 --> 00:00:20,621 And dig yourselves. It's really groovy. 5 00:00:56,590 --> 00:00:59,693 * You don't hear no sounds, but dig this * 6 00:01:17,345 --> 00:01:19,580 * Yeah 7 00:01:25,353 --> 00:01:27,155 * Yeah 8 00:01:29,223 --> 00:01:31,225 * Yeah, OK, then--hey * 9 00:01:34,262 --> 00:01:35,796 * Hey, man 10 00:01:36,697 --> 00:01:38,766 * Yeah, dig, brother 11 00:02:00,688 --> 00:02:02,523 * Groovy, groovy 12 00:02:10,664 --> 00:02:13,667 * Hey, what's up? Hey, we got some--hey * 13 00:02:13,767 --> 00:02:15,503 * Yeah, OK, let's--hey 14 00:02:15,603 --> 00:02:17,371 * Hey, man 15 00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:19,273 * Yeah, dig, brother 16 00:02:23,277 --> 00:02:24,945 * Groovy, groovy 17 00:02:25,213 --> 00:02:26,814 * Groovy, groovy * 18 00:02:31,385 --> 00:02:33,354 * Groovy, groovy 19 00:02:33,454 --> 00:02:35,256 * Groovy, groovy 20 00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:41,362 * Groovy, groovy 21 00:02:41,462 --> 00:02:43,697 * Groovy, groovy 22 00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:49,069 * Groovy, groovy * 23 00:02:49,270 --> 00:02:50,971 * Yeah, dig, brother * 24 00:02:51,239 --> 00:02:52,840 Hello? 25 00:02:55,643 --> 00:02:57,611 * Groovy, groovy 26 00:02:57,711 --> 00:02:59,613 * Groovy, groovy 27 00:03:03,484 --> 00:03:05,118 * Groovy, groovy 28 00:03:05,319 --> 00:03:07,255 * Groovy, groovy * 29 00:03:49,630 --> 00:03:51,899 (Loud music plays) 30 00:04:06,480 --> 00:04:07,315 Fuck! 31 00:04:07,415 --> 00:04:08,849 Oh, yeah. 32 00:04:17,525 --> 00:04:18,792 (Guitars fade) 33 00:04:18,892 --> 00:04:20,661 Shit. Fuse box again. 34 00:04:20,761 --> 00:04:21,862 I got it last time. 35 00:04:21,962 --> 00:04:23,364 I know. 36 00:04:25,366 --> 00:04:27,368 Um... 37 00:04:27,468 --> 00:04:28,402 Excuse me. 38 00:04:28,502 --> 00:04:29,537 Excuse me. 39 00:04:29,637 --> 00:04:31,539 Is James Andrews around? 40 00:04:31,639 --> 00:04:33,641 What are you, a narc? 41 00:04:33,741 --> 00:04:35,476 No, no, no. I'm a pre-frosh. 42 00:04:35,576 --> 00:04:37,811 I'm just looking for James Andrews. 43 00:04:40,047 --> 00:04:41,649 Heads up! 44 00:04:41,749 --> 00:04:42,983 James Andrews... 45 00:04:43,083 --> 00:04:45,953 Oh, Droz. He's in the hole, room two. 46 00:04:46,053 --> 00:04:48,622 Um...where-- 47 00:04:48,722 --> 00:04:50,023 The basement. 48 00:04:50,958 --> 00:04:53,494 Come on. Follow me. 49 00:05:01,502 --> 00:05:03,804 End of the hall. 50 00:05:10,043 --> 00:05:11,979 Ahem. 51 00:05:13,381 --> 00:05:14,382 Go ahead. 52 00:05:14,482 --> 00:05:16,717 Last door on the left. 53 00:05:41,409 --> 00:05:42,510 Hello? 54 00:05:48,416 --> 00:05:50,217 Uh... 55 00:05:50,484 --> 00:05:51,952 James? 56 00:05:52,052 --> 00:05:54,488 (Snoring) 57 00:05:54,588 --> 00:05:56,924 Uh, excuse me. 58 00:05:58,426 --> 00:06:00,093 Ooh. 59 00:06:00,428 --> 00:06:01,161 Uh... 60 00:06:01,429 --> 00:06:02,996 (Snoring) 61 00:06:03,096 --> 00:06:04,465 Uh... 62 00:06:08,436 --> 00:06:10,738 (Snores) 63 00:06:13,507 --> 00:06:14,775 Coffee. 64 00:06:15,676 --> 00:06:17,044 Coffee now! 65 00:06:19,713 --> 00:06:21,148 There. 66 00:06:26,887 --> 00:06:28,055 All right, what do you need, 67 00:06:28,155 --> 00:06:31,024 bottle rockets, dental dams, reddi-whips? 68 00:06:31,124 --> 00:06:32,626 Term papers? 69 00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,528 Um, actually, no, no, no. 70 00:06:34,628 --> 00:06:36,797 I'm Tom Lawrence. I'm a pre-frosh. 71 00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:40,534 I'm just up here at Port Chester 72 00:06:40,634 --> 00:06:42,536 just to see if I want to go here. 73 00:06:42,636 --> 00:06:44,505 What am I, a stop on the tour? 74 00:06:44,605 --> 00:06:45,573 Actually, um, 75 00:06:45,673 --> 00:06:46,974 admissions arranged for me 76 00:06:47,074 --> 00:06:50,043 to spend the night at your frat. 77 00:06:50,143 --> 00:06:52,680 Gee, Scooter, frats were banned in the sixties. 78 00:06:52,780 --> 00:06:54,314 They were? 79 00:06:54,548 --> 00:06:56,550 Let me see that. 80 00:06:56,650 --> 00:06:57,885 I don't believe this. 81 00:06:57,985 --> 00:07:00,220 I've been pimped by admissions. 82 00:07:00,488 --> 00:07:01,589 OK. 83 00:07:01,689 --> 00:07:02,790 Want some advice? 84 00:07:02,890 --> 00:07:03,857 Well, yeah. 85 00:07:03,957 --> 00:07:04,958 Here's all you need to know: 86 00:07:05,058 --> 00:07:06,393 classes--nothing before 11:00; 87 00:07:06,494 --> 00:07:07,895 beer--your best friend, you drink a lot of it; 88 00:07:07,995 --> 00:07:09,162 women--you're a freshman, 89 00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:10,163 so it's pretty much out of the question. 90 00:07:10,263 --> 00:07:11,565 Will you have a car? Um, no. 91 00:07:11,665 --> 00:07:13,033 Someone on your hall will. 92 00:07:13,133 --> 00:07:14,267 Find them and make friends with them on the first day. 93 00:07:14,502 --> 00:07:16,537 Anything else? 94 00:07:16,637 --> 00:07:18,739 Yeah. Um... 95 00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:20,541 look, uh, 96 00:07:20,641 --> 00:07:22,843 can anyone just, uh, 97 00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:26,614 live in these big houses with--with girls? 98 00:07:28,516 --> 00:07:31,719 Times have changed in the past 30 years, Tomas. 99 00:07:31,819 --> 00:07:33,053 We no longer swill sherry 100 00:07:33,153 --> 00:07:34,955 and screw goats for fun anymore. 101 00:07:35,055 --> 00:07:36,890 I'd love to tell you about it, but... 102 00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:39,627 Should I just leave my stuff in your room? 103 00:07:39,727 --> 00:07:40,661 Uh, no. 104 00:07:40,761 --> 00:07:41,995 Look, I'd like to help you out, 105 00:07:42,095 --> 00:07:43,531 but we're cutting in on my nap time as it is. 106 00:07:43,597 --> 00:07:44,632 But the good news is 107 00:07:44,732 --> 00:07:45,633 I've got just the guy for the job. 108 00:07:45,733 --> 00:07:47,601 (Loud music plays) 109 00:07:47,701 --> 00:07:50,538 Yo, Gut, what's up, baby? 110 00:07:50,604 --> 00:07:51,605 What's up, Droz? 111 00:07:51,705 --> 00:07:52,940 Got any smokes, baby? 112 00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:54,241 No, man, last one. 113 00:07:54,542 --> 00:07:55,909 Listen, Tom-man-- 114 00:07:56,009 --> 00:07:57,578 (Turns down music) 115 00:07:57,678 --> 00:07:58,846 Tom-man here is a pre-frosh. 116 00:07:58,946 --> 00:08:00,748 I told him you'd show him around. 117 00:08:00,848 --> 00:08:01,749 No can do. 118 00:08:01,849 --> 00:08:02,816 Whoa, Gut, can't or won't? 119 00:08:02,916 --> 00:08:03,951 Can't, man. 120 00:08:04,051 --> 00:08:05,553 It's grunge night at Vienna House. 121 00:08:05,619 --> 00:08:06,654 The Merkins are opening 122 00:08:06,754 --> 00:08:07,988 for Frog and Toad Are Friends. 123 00:08:08,088 --> 00:08:09,022 I got to psych up for the show. 124 00:08:09,122 --> 00:08:10,390 Frog and Toad Are Friends, 125 00:08:10,558 --> 00:08:11,892 that's with the guy from the Clash, right? 126 00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:14,394 The? The Clash. 127 00:08:14,562 --> 00:08:15,829 I don't know if you're aware of this, Gutter, 128 00:08:15,929 --> 00:08:16,964 but there actually was music 129 00:08:17,064 --> 00:08:18,799 recorded before 1989. 130 00:08:18,899 --> 00:08:19,900 What is this? 131 00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,769 You're wearing this to the show? 132 00:08:21,869 --> 00:08:23,036 You're gonna wear the shirt 133 00:08:23,136 --> 00:08:24,838 of the band you're gonna go see? 134 00:08:24,938 --> 00:08:26,674 Don't be that guy. 135 00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:33,947 Hey! Dave! 136 00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:35,182 Dave, Dave! What's up, my brothers? 137 00:08:35,282 --> 00:08:36,584 Here we go. Very quickly, 138 00:08:36,617 --> 00:08:37,851 just a quick moment of-- 139 00:08:37,951 --> 00:08:39,620 It's all right. Mullaney. 140 00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:40,688 What's up? Good to see you. 141 00:08:40,788 --> 00:08:41,722 Is this a pre-frosh? 142 00:08:41,822 --> 00:08:42,723 Yes, it is. 143 00:08:42,823 --> 00:08:43,724 You showing him around? 144 00:08:43,824 --> 00:08:44,858 Actually-- You know, 145 00:08:44,958 --> 00:08:45,993 that's really swell. 146 00:08:46,093 --> 00:08:47,595 Now, you gotta make sure he gives you 147 00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:49,029 the special bicentennial tour, 200 years of bullshit. 148 00:08:49,129 --> 00:08:50,463 You little bitch. 149 00:08:50,598 --> 00:08:51,999 Yep, now we're even for the milk bones. 150 00:08:52,099 --> 00:08:54,635 You signed me up as a weekend host. 151 00:08:54,735 --> 00:08:55,669 You swing bag. 152 00:08:55,769 --> 00:08:56,704 Sucker. 153 00:08:56,804 --> 00:08:58,105 Milk bones? 154 00:08:58,205 --> 00:09:00,641 Spring Break, I filled his suitcase with dog biscuits 155 00:09:00,741 --> 00:09:01,975 coming back from Jamaica. 156 00:09:02,075 --> 00:09:05,613 Drug-sniffing dogs went ape shit. 157 00:09:05,713 --> 00:09:07,447 I got one more idea. 158 00:09:07,681 --> 00:09:08,816 Pigman! 159 00:09:08,916 --> 00:09:09,850 (Tires squeal) 160 00:09:09,950 --> 00:09:10,884 Pigman! 161 00:09:10,984 --> 00:09:12,185 What's he doing? 162 00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:14,221 He's finishing his senior thesis. 163 00:09:14,321 --> 00:09:17,024 Pigman is trying to prove the Caine/Hackman Theory. 164 00:09:17,124 --> 00:09:18,626 No matter what time it is, 165 00:09:18,726 --> 00:09:20,193 24 hours a day, you can find 166 00:09:20,293 --> 00:09:21,729 a Michael Caine or a Gene Hackman movie 167 00:09:21,829 --> 00:09:23,096 playing on TV. 168 00:09:23,196 --> 00:09:24,632 Wait, that's his thesis? Yes! 169 00:09:24,698 --> 00:09:25,633 That's the beauty 170 00:09:25,733 --> 00:09:27,100 of college these days, Tommy. 171 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:29,236 You can major in Game Boy if you know how to bullshit. 172 00:09:29,336 --> 00:09:31,471 Have a seat, there's the TV. 173 00:09:31,672 --> 00:09:32,873 Pigman's got you covered. 174 00:09:32,973 --> 00:09:36,109 Call me for the shower scene in Dressed To Kill. 175 00:09:36,209 --> 00:09:38,411 Um... 176 00:09:38,646 --> 00:09:40,013 What? 177 00:09:40,113 --> 00:09:43,150 Did I tell you that I'm from Delaware? 178 00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:44,852 Really? 179 00:09:44,952 --> 00:09:49,089 Well, I mean, I just spent 6 hou-- 180 00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:50,724 6 hours on a public bus 181 00:09:50,824 --> 00:09:51,825 just to come to Port Chester 182 00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:53,160 to decide if I want to come here. 183 00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:55,095 So, you know, maybe I should see the campus 184 00:09:55,195 --> 00:09:56,664 or, you know, like, a pep rally 185 00:09:56,730 --> 00:09:57,665 or a tailgate party. OK, OK. 186 00:09:57,765 --> 00:10:00,433 OK, OK. I-- I've got it. 187 00:10:00,634 --> 00:10:02,135 Here's the deal. 188 00:10:02,235 --> 00:10:04,071 You gotta get all this fifties cornball shit 189 00:10:04,171 --> 00:10:05,538 out of your head. 190 00:10:05,639 --> 00:10:07,641 It's a whole new ball game on campus these days, 191 00:10:07,741 --> 00:10:09,209 and they call it PC. 192 00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:10,210 PC? 193 00:10:10,310 --> 00:10:11,611 Politically Correct, 194 00:10:11,712 --> 00:10:13,213 and it's not just politics, it's everything. 195 00:10:13,313 --> 00:10:15,148 it's what you eat, it's what wear, 196 00:10:15,248 --> 00:10:16,283 and it's what you say. 197 00:10:16,383 --> 00:10:17,584 And if you don't watch yourself, 198 00:10:17,685 --> 00:10:19,519 you can get in a butt-load of trouble. 199 00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:21,722 For instance, see these girls? 200 00:10:21,822 --> 00:10:22,823 Yeah. 201 00:10:22,923 --> 00:10:24,191 No, you don't. Those are women. 202 00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:25,659 You call them girls, and they'll pop your figs. 203 00:10:25,759 --> 00:10:26,727 Save the whales. 204 00:10:26,827 --> 00:10:29,129 MAN: Gays in the military now! 205 00:10:29,229 --> 00:10:30,864 Free Nelson Mandela. 206 00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:33,333 They freed him already. 207 00:10:34,935 --> 00:10:36,737 What? 208 00:10:36,837 --> 00:10:38,238 Those women? 209 00:10:38,338 --> 00:10:41,041 Those aren't women, Tom. 210 00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:42,575 Those are Womynists. 211 00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:46,814 You know, I saw the new Madonna video last night. 212 00:10:46,914 --> 00:10:48,581 Unfricking-believable. 213 00:10:48,682 --> 00:10:51,985 See the one in the middle with the blond hair? 214 00:10:52,085 --> 00:10:53,086 Yeah. 215 00:10:53,186 --> 00:10:55,355 She's looking at me, isn't she? 216 00:10:55,455 --> 00:10:57,758 Kind of. What, do you know her or something? 217 00:10:57,858 --> 00:10:58,992 Hey, Sam, 218 00:10:59,092 --> 00:11:01,795 isn't that the guy that you used to, uh... 219 00:11:01,895 --> 00:11:02,830 Yeah. 220 00:11:02,930 --> 00:11:05,098 You went out with a white male? 221 00:11:05,198 --> 00:11:06,734 I was a freshman. 222 00:11:06,800 --> 00:11:08,068 Freshperson. Please. 223 00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:09,636 Please. 224 00:11:09,737 --> 00:11:11,739 Go talk to her. What's the problem? 225 00:11:11,805 --> 00:11:13,173 Watch this. 226 00:11:13,273 --> 00:11:16,076 He's coming over here. Sisters, form a wall! 227 00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:19,780 No, you don't have to do that. 228 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:21,749 Hi. How you doing? 229 00:11:21,815 --> 00:11:23,383 Is Sam in there? 230 00:11:23,483 --> 00:11:25,819 In there? What's that supposed to mean? 231 00:11:25,919 --> 00:11:27,755 Yeah, cock man oppressor. 232 00:11:27,821 --> 00:11:28,856 Thank you. 233 00:11:28,956 --> 00:11:31,391 Maybe one of you could just tell her 234 00:11:31,491 --> 00:11:34,161 that Mr. Pokey stopped by. 235 00:11:38,832 --> 00:11:40,133 OK. 236 00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:44,137 What the hell was that-- Mr. Pokey? 237 00:11:44,237 --> 00:11:47,908 I think he meant his, uh, phallus. 238 00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:52,112 You participated in a phallus naming? 239 00:11:52,212 --> 00:11:55,415 No. No, I have no idea. 240 00:11:55,515 --> 00:11:57,818 You stay away from him, Sam. 241 00:11:57,918 --> 00:11:59,186 He's an animal. 242 00:11:59,286 --> 00:12:02,022 You know, this place is kind of insane. 243 00:12:02,122 --> 00:12:04,858 Wait till you meet the causeheads. 244 00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:05,926 The what? 245 00:12:06,026 --> 00:12:07,494 What don't we eat? 246 00:12:07,795 --> 00:12:08,528 Red meat! 247 00:12:08,796 --> 00:12:10,163 Why don't we eat it? 248 00:12:10,263 --> 00:12:11,198 It's murder! 249 00:12:11,298 --> 00:12:12,933 What don't we eat? 250 00:12:13,033 --> 00:12:13,967 Red meat. 251 00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:16,069 Why don't we eat it? 252 00:12:16,169 --> 00:12:17,370 These, Tom, are your causeheads. 253 00:12:17,470 --> 00:12:19,106 They find a world-threatening issue 254 00:12:19,206 --> 00:12:21,308 and stick with it for about a week. 255 00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:22,442 What's up? What up? 256 00:12:22,542 --> 00:12:24,344 What happened to the ozone layer? 257 00:12:24,444 --> 00:12:25,913 That was last week. Now it's meat. 258 00:12:26,013 --> 00:12:27,347 Grill is serving up chili burgers, 259 00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:29,349 but they're not letting anyone in or out. 260 00:12:29,449 --> 00:12:31,919 I love chili burgers. What about you, Daves? 261 00:12:32,019 --> 00:12:33,286 Yeah. Yeah. 262 00:12:33,386 --> 00:12:34,922 Let's do lunch. 263 00:12:35,022 --> 00:12:37,157 All right. 264 00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:38,225 Red meat! 265 00:12:38,325 --> 00:12:39,960 Why don't we eat it? 266 00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:40,994 It's murder. 267 00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:42,429 What don't we eat? 268 00:12:42,529 --> 00:12:43,663 Red meat. 269 00:12:43,864 --> 00:12:45,598 Why don't we eat it? 270 00:12:45,833 --> 00:12:46,666 It's murder! 271 00:12:46,867 --> 00:12:48,101 What don't we eat? 272 00:12:48,201 --> 00:12:50,037 Red meat. 273 00:12:50,137 --> 00:12:51,104 Don't eat us! 274 00:12:51,204 --> 00:12:52,305 It's murder. 275 00:12:52,405 --> 00:12:54,074 Remember, cows are our friends. 276 00:12:54,174 --> 00:12:55,608 What don't we eat? 277 00:12:55,843 --> 00:12:56,844 Red meat. 278 00:12:56,944 --> 00:12:58,979 Why don't we eat it? 279 00:12:59,079 --> 00:13:00,280 It's murder. 280 00:13:00,380 --> 00:13:02,149 The charred flesh served in this cafeteria... 281 00:13:02,249 --> 00:13:05,118 Oop. Paint. 282 00:13:05,218 --> 00:13:07,955 (Cheering) 283 00:13:08,055 --> 00:13:10,190 Harsh bud. 284 00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:11,892 And the non-toxic paint... 285 00:13:11,992 --> 00:13:14,094 Moonbeam, I like your style. Go. 286 00:13:14,194 --> 00:13:15,996 Wrung from the scorched flesh 287 00:13:16,096 --> 00:13:17,898 of innocent creatures. 288 00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:23,436 Go! Go! 289 00:13:27,875 --> 00:13:29,009 Wha-what? 290 00:13:41,488 --> 00:13:44,157 MAN: * I was standin' 291 00:13:44,257 --> 00:13:45,458 * By my window 292 00:13:45,558 --> 00:13:47,527 You may be saying to yourselves, 293 00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:51,198 what of the hungry students of this university? 294 00:13:51,298 --> 00:13:53,633 * On a cloudy day 295 00:13:53,733 --> 00:13:57,370 ...with the use of their legs and hands... 296 00:13:58,638 --> 00:14:02,242 Then they would understand the plight of the field calf. 297 00:14:02,342 --> 00:14:04,144 * I was standin' 298 00:14:04,244 --> 00:14:07,147 If every student on this campus... 299 00:14:07,247 --> 00:14:08,548 (Feedback) 300 00:14:11,484 --> 00:14:15,655 were to starve, it would be worth the life of a cow. 301 00:14:15,923 --> 00:14:16,656 Moo! 302 00:14:16,924 --> 00:14:19,059 Yum. 303 00:14:19,159 --> 00:14:20,928 Hopefully, this will not come to pass. 304 00:14:20,994 --> 00:14:25,365 But if it were, who is to say that the life-- 305 00:14:29,036 --> 00:14:30,503 What the hell? 306 00:14:33,006 --> 00:14:34,107 Aah. 307 00:14:34,207 --> 00:14:35,943 Hey! 308 00:14:45,953 --> 00:14:47,120 Now. 309 00:14:50,257 --> 00:14:52,125 Here's lunch. 310 00:14:53,326 --> 00:14:55,628 (Screaming) 311 00:15:02,169 --> 00:15:03,403 Nicely done, gentlemen. 312 00:15:03,503 --> 00:15:04,671 All right. Now what? 313 00:15:04,972 --> 00:15:06,439 Now we run. 314 00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:21,221 Dave. 315 00:15:21,321 --> 00:15:22,622 Dave? 316 00:15:25,192 --> 00:15:27,094 MAN: And the walls are painted white, 317 00:15:27,194 --> 00:15:28,895 and the chalk is white, 318 00:15:28,996 --> 00:15:31,531 and even the copy machine and paper is white. 319 00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:32,565 Excuse me. 320 00:15:32,665 --> 00:15:33,633 This, my friend, 321 00:15:33,733 --> 00:15:35,268 is a white devil's conspiracy. 322 00:15:35,368 --> 00:15:37,004 Meat tosser! 323 00:15:37,104 --> 00:15:39,006 Stop the violator! 324 00:15:42,409 --> 00:15:45,412 Ohhh! 325 00:15:51,718 --> 00:15:53,286 MOONBEAM: Level of insensitivity-- 326 00:15:53,386 --> 00:15:55,488 "c," unconscionable. 327 00:15:57,024 --> 00:15:59,026 Offended. 328 00:16:01,561 --> 00:16:04,164 Oh, thank God. President Garcia-Thompson. 329 00:16:04,264 --> 00:16:05,332 Students, fill out those forms 330 00:16:05,432 --> 00:16:06,566 and don't skip a line. 331 00:16:06,666 --> 00:16:09,102 It was those persons in the pit again. 332 00:16:09,202 --> 00:16:10,303 I know, Moonbeam. 333 00:16:10,403 --> 00:16:12,139 Those pit offenders are single-handedly 334 00:16:12,239 --> 00:16:14,641 destroying the sensitivity levels on this campus. 335 00:16:14,741 --> 00:16:17,410 Of course, I can't simply throw them out of school. 336 00:16:17,510 --> 00:16:20,280 After all, they're still 15 complaints away 337 00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:22,315 from expulsion. 338 00:16:22,415 --> 00:16:25,752 Don't worry, their day will come. 339 00:16:27,054 --> 00:16:29,556 Um, Ms. President? 340 00:16:29,656 --> 00:16:32,359 There's some preppy person in your office. 341 00:16:32,459 --> 00:16:34,627 Madras ties. 342 00:16:34,727 --> 00:16:36,529 Sweet. 343 00:16:41,068 --> 00:16:43,470 McPherson, what the hell are you doing? 344 00:16:43,570 --> 00:16:45,505 Ooh, pretty outfit. 345 00:16:45,605 --> 00:16:47,974 Real summery. What is that, Dacron? 346 00:16:48,075 --> 00:16:51,144 How many times have I told you not to meet me here? 347 00:16:51,244 --> 00:16:53,246 I have a reputation to uphold. 348 00:16:53,346 --> 00:16:54,281 Don't run from your feelings. 349 00:16:54,381 --> 00:16:55,315 I think it's time people 350 00:16:55,415 --> 00:16:56,683 know the truth about us. 351 00:16:56,783 --> 00:16:59,352 The truth, McPherson, is that you disgust me. 352 00:16:59,452 --> 00:17:01,488 The only thing we'll ever have in common 353 00:17:01,588 --> 00:17:03,156 is a hatred of the pit. 354 00:17:03,256 --> 00:17:04,391 Just give it time. 355 00:17:04,491 --> 00:17:07,560 The information, Republican. 356 00:17:08,528 --> 00:17:10,597 Signed, sealed, and... 357 00:17:10,697 --> 00:17:14,634 snatched rudely. What a surprise. 358 00:17:14,734 --> 00:17:18,638 Perfect. I'll bring it to the pit immediately. 359 00:17:18,738 --> 00:17:21,208 And we'll call the movers. 360 00:17:28,848 --> 00:17:30,950 Hey, Jack, the floor's closed 361 00:17:31,118 --> 00:17:32,919 unless you're working on a thesis. 362 00:17:33,120 --> 00:17:35,122 You working on a thesis? 363 00:17:35,188 --> 00:17:36,456 Uh, no, I'm lost. 364 00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:38,958 I'm trying to get back to the pit. 365 00:17:39,126 --> 00:17:42,462 Well, don't get your balls in an uproar. 366 00:17:42,562 --> 00:17:44,631 Just follow me. 367 00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:50,303 Get your feet off the desk. 368 00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:51,704 Uh, what's everybody doing? 369 00:17:51,804 --> 00:17:53,540 Finishing their theses, fuzzhead. 370 00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:55,242 They're due Monday morning. 371 00:17:55,342 --> 00:17:56,543 Now, there's the door. 372 00:17:56,643 --> 00:17:58,211 Oh, thanks. 373 00:18:02,749 --> 00:18:04,617 Damn it. 374 00:18:08,388 --> 00:18:10,223 What? 375 00:18:22,769 --> 00:18:25,938 Hey, Cecelia, are you going to be free tonight? 376 00:18:26,206 --> 00:18:27,174 Why? 377 00:18:27,207 --> 00:18:28,175 You want to have dinner... 378 00:18:28,241 --> 00:18:29,176 with us? 379 00:18:29,276 --> 00:18:30,377 What, like a date? 380 00:18:30,477 --> 00:18:31,411 Yeah. Yeah. 381 00:18:31,511 --> 00:18:32,479 God. 382 00:18:32,579 --> 00:18:34,013 Katy, I was thinking. 383 00:18:34,214 --> 00:18:35,215 When we start that song, 384 00:18:35,315 --> 00:18:36,649 it's got to be a lot faster. 385 00:18:36,749 --> 00:18:38,518 You mean like this? 386 00:18:38,618 --> 00:18:40,553 You're in my chair. Get out. 387 00:18:40,653 --> 00:18:43,590 Now remember to make mine extra crispy, Gut. 388 00:18:43,690 --> 00:18:45,225 DROZ: Be careful, man. 389 00:18:45,325 --> 00:18:46,793 I like it rare, not cold. 390 00:18:46,893 --> 00:18:48,595 I got ya. 391 00:18:56,269 --> 00:18:59,038 So, this is the sewer where you persons 392 00:18:59,206 --> 00:19:01,974 breed your anti-community crimes. 393 00:19:02,209 --> 00:19:03,610 Hello, Mrs. Gar-- 394 00:19:03,710 --> 00:19:06,313 President Garcia-Thompson. 395 00:19:06,413 --> 00:19:08,381 DROZ: Hey, monkeys, how about a little respect? 396 00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:10,450 The presiding person of the university 397 00:19:10,550 --> 00:19:11,818 just walked in. 398 00:19:11,918 --> 00:19:15,555 (Playing Hail To the Chief) 399 00:19:21,494 --> 00:19:22,529 Stop that. 400 00:19:22,629 --> 00:19:25,232 Turn that noise pollution down. 401 00:19:26,299 --> 00:19:29,369 Please put out that cigarette right now. 402 00:19:29,469 --> 00:19:30,437 All right. 403 00:19:30,537 --> 00:19:32,272 Do I need to remind you 404 00:19:32,372 --> 00:19:34,241 that this house already has enough complaints 405 00:19:34,341 --> 00:19:36,776 to qualify for a sensitivity awareness weekend? 406 00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:38,278 You passed out cigarettes 407 00:19:38,378 --> 00:19:40,680 for a smoke-a-thon on Earth Day, 408 00:19:40,780 --> 00:19:43,816 you installed speed bumps on the handicapped ramps, 409 00:19:43,916 --> 00:19:47,554 and most recently, you dumped 100 pounds of... 410 00:19:47,654 --> 00:19:50,490 meat on a peaceful vegan protest. 411 00:19:50,590 --> 00:19:51,624 Oh, come on! 412 00:19:51,724 --> 00:19:53,360 That was way more than 100 pounds. 413 00:19:53,460 --> 00:19:55,462 Very amusing, Mr. Andrews. 414 00:19:55,562 --> 00:19:56,863 Thanks. 415 00:19:56,963 --> 00:20:00,667 Here's something you won't find quite so funny. 416 00:20:01,601 --> 00:20:02,735 This, offenders, 417 00:20:02,835 --> 00:20:05,372 is your damage bill for the semester. 418 00:20:05,472 --> 00:20:09,576 The total comes to $7,568. 419 00:20:09,676 --> 00:20:12,379 Housing forms for next year are due Monday. 420 00:20:12,479 --> 00:20:13,780 And if that bill isn't paid, 421 00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:15,114 this house will be repossessed. 422 00:20:15,315 --> 00:20:16,583 What? No way! 423 00:20:16,683 --> 00:20:18,685 You can't be serious, right? 424 00:20:18,785 --> 00:20:20,653 Now, if you'll excuse me, 425 00:20:20,753 --> 00:20:24,223 I have a bicentennial to plan. 426 00:20:25,458 --> 00:20:26,759 CECELIA: This sucks. 427 00:20:26,859 --> 00:20:29,529 GUTTER: Ma'am, can-- ma'am? Hello? 428 00:20:29,629 --> 00:20:30,930 7 thou? 429 00:20:31,030 --> 00:20:33,132 We're in deep shit, huh? 430 00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:34,934 Where the hell are we gonna live next year? 431 00:20:35,034 --> 00:20:36,703 It's like 3 weeks before school ends. 432 00:20:36,803 --> 00:20:39,171 Ladies and gentlemen, I think it's time 433 00:20:39,272 --> 00:20:40,607 to revive an ancient tradition 434 00:20:40,707 --> 00:20:42,141 we seem to have long forgotten. 435 00:20:42,241 --> 00:20:44,544 They confiscated the altar, Droz. 436 00:20:44,644 --> 00:20:46,713 No, I'm not talking about human sacrifice, 437 00:20:46,813 --> 00:20:49,181 Ceel, I'm talking about something that we used to do 438 00:20:49,282 --> 00:20:52,452 every Saturday night as a matter of principle. 439 00:20:56,423 --> 00:20:57,590 Here's a hint: 440 00:20:57,690 --> 00:20:59,859 legions of hand-stamped meatheads 441 00:20:59,959 --> 00:21:01,961 in co-ed naked lacrosse t-shirts 442 00:21:02,061 --> 00:21:04,364 power chugging watered-down Meisterchau, 443 00:21:04,464 --> 00:21:06,165 regurgitating on the glue-matted floors. 444 00:21:06,333 --> 00:21:08,868 Kiln-like temperatures, fights with townies, 445 00:21:08,968 --> 00:21:10,370 lines of drunken people 446 00:21:10,470 --> 00:21:11,571 waiting for the bathroom. 447 00:21:11,671 --> 00:21:12,805 Wait a second. 448 00:21:12,905 --> 00:21:15,442 You guys are talking about a party. 449 00:21:15,542 --> 00:21:16,543 Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding! 450 00:21:16,643 --> 00:21:18,878 Gutter, tell her what she's won. 451 00:21:18,978 --> 00:21:20,980 We get some beer, we have a band, 452 00:21:21,080 --> 00:21:23,383 and we overcharge at the door. 453 00:21:23,483 --> 00:21:24,751 Droz, there's no way. 454 00:21:24,851 --> 00:21:26,986 We need an all-campus party to raise enough money. 455 00:21:27,086 --> 00:21:28,821 No one's been able to pull that off in years. 456 00:21:28,921 --> 00:21:29,822 You know what happens-- 457 00:21:29,922 --> 00:21:30,857 half the school protests. 458 00:21:30,957 --> 00:21:32,058 The other half boycotts. 459 00:21:32,158 --> 00:21:33,560 Yeah, and besides, think about it. 460 00:21:33,660 --> 00:21:34,694 Even if we could get them all here, 461 00:21:34,794 --> 00:21:36,529 it'd be like a total PC war zone. 462 00:21:36,629 --> 00:21:38,130 Well, there is one other option-- 463 00:21:38,365 --> 00:21:39,966 we get jobs. 464 00:21:40,900 --> 00:21:42,435 I vote party. 465 00:21:42,535 --> 00:21:44,236 I can't handle a job, man. 466 00:21:44,437 --> 00:21:45,538 We're totally on it. 467 00:21:45,638 --> 00:21:46,606 What do you want us to do? 468 00:21:46,706 --> 00:21:48,207 So, uh, who's on beer? 469 00:21:48,375 --> 00:21:50,710 Uh, well, that would roughly be you, Gut. 470 00:21:50,810 --> 00:21:52,712 I suggest kegs-- multiple, cold, and domestic. 471 00:21:52,812 --> 00:21:54,714 I have to meet Mersh in Jerry town 472 00:21:54,814 --> 00:21:55,815 for my ride to the show. 473 00:21:55,915 --> 00:21:56,983 OK, well, you call those 474 00:21:57,083 --> 00:21:58,418 useless yerk-toting, frisbee-chucking 475 00:21:58,518 --> 00:21:59,719 cheeba monkeys, 476 00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:01,654 and you tell them you're gonna be an hour late. 477 00:22:01,754 --> 00:22:03,022 Ceel, Katy, Raj, and Deege, 478 00:22:03,122 --> 00:22:06,092 the stage is set, your band will play. 479 00:22:06,192 --> 00:22:07,527 But, Droz, we don't even have a name. 480 00:22:07,627 --> 00:22:08,995 Well, you get a name, you give it to the Daves, 481 00:22:09,095 --> 00:22:10,196 they'll put up the fliers. 482 00:22:10,430 --> 00:22:11,263 On it. On it. 483 00:22:11,464 --> 00:22:13,466 Pigman. Yeah? 484 00:22:13,566 --> 00:22:14,501 Stay put. 485 00:22:14,601 --> 00:22:16,603 We charge 5 bucks a head. 486 00:22:16,703 --> 00:22:17,937 Mastercard and Visa accepted. 487 00:22:18,037 --> 00:22:19,038 Droz, 488 00:22:19,138 --> 00:22:22,909 what happened to that cute preppy kid? 489 00:22:23,009 --> 00:22:24,677 Who? 490 00:22:24,777 --> 00:22:26,012 The pre-frosh. 491 00:22:26,112 --> 00:22:28,014 That's a good question. 492 00:23:01,881 --> 00:23:03,983 What's up, Mersh? 493 00:23:07,687 --> 00:23:09,456 Gutter, what's up, bud? 494 00:23:09,556 --> 00:23:12,291 Tried to call you guys, like, 6 times, man. 495 00:23:12,525 --> 00:23:14,994 What's the deal? 496 00:23:16,496 --> 00:23:17,464 Listen, Mersh, 497 00:23:17,530 --> 00:23:20,366 I gotta get beer for this party tonight, 498 00:23:20,467 --> 00:23:23,536 so I'm going to be late for my ride to Hartford. 499 00:23:23,636 --> 00:23:25,905 Sorry, Gut, man, no can do. 500 00:23:26,005 --> 00:23:28,641 The Grand Master of Funk 501 00:23:28,741 --> 00:23:32,044 descends on the city at 8:00, man, 502 00:23:32,144 --> 00:23:33,780 and we will be there. 503 00:23:33,880 --> 00:23:35,615 Mersh, you hate punk. 504 00:23:36,883 --> 00:23:38,685 Funk, Gutter. 505 00:23:38,785 --> 00:23:39,719 Funk. 506 00:23:39,819 --> 00:23:40,787 George Clinton. 507 00:23:40,887 --> 00:23:43,255 Parliament Funkadelic. 508 00:23:43,490 --> 00:23:44,757 Dude, 509 00:23:44,857 --> 00:23:47,794 aren't you a music major? 510 00:23:47,894 --> 00:23:48,895 Yeah. 511 00:23:48,995 --> 00:23:51,498 Ha ha ha ha ha! 512 00:23:53,533 --> 00:23:56,168 (Laughter) 513 00:23:59,572 --> 00:24:01,974 Maybe you guys could just give me a lift 514 00:24:02,074 --> 00:24:04,076 to the liquor store then. 515 00:24:04,176 --> 00:24:05,678 We got intramural finals this afternoon, 516 00:24:05,778 --> 00:24:06,746 man, sorry. 517 00:24:06,846 --> 00:24:08,981 Well, what am I supposed to do? 518 00:24:09,081 --> 00:24:11,551 Have a bong hit. 519 00:24:14,120 --> 00:24:15,855 GUTTER: What good is that going to do me? 520 00:24:15,955 --> 00:24:19,626 Just one little binger to brighten up your day. 521 00:24:19,726 --> 00:24:22,094 Come on, man. 522 00:24:24,964 --> 00:24:26,533 Just one hit, 523 00:24:26,599 --> 00:24:28,868 then I got to go. 524 00:24:31,604 --> 00:24:33,205 MAN: Look at the stitching. 525 00:24:33,305 --> 00:24:35,675 It's got to be L.L. Bean. 526 00:24:35,775 --> 00:24:36,843 Yes. 527 00:24:36,943 --> 00:24:38,778 But can he be trusted? 528 00:24:38,878 --> 00:24:41,914 Look at his tie. 529 00:24:42,014 --> 00:24:44,016 His complexion. 530 00:24:44,116 --> 00:24:46,018 He's definitely one of us. 531 00:24:46,118 --> 00:24:48,955 Hey--wait. Where am I? 532 00:24:49,055 --> 00:24:50,790 You're safe now. 533 00:24:50,890 --> 00:24:52,559 Allow me. Carter Prescott, 534 00:24:52,625 --> 00:24:56,095 Pledge Master of the secret fraternity of Balls and Shaft. 535 00:24:56,195 --> 00:24:58,598 Tom Lawrence, pre-frosh. 536 00:24:58,698 --> 00:25:00,567 Bantam Draper. 537 00:25:00,667 --> 00:25:01,968 Um... 538 00:25:02,869 --> 00:25:05,271 so, this is a frat? 539 00:25:05,371 --> 00:25:07,574 CARTER: The school outlawed fraternities 540 00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:09,576 in 1967, Tom. 541 00:25:09,676 --> 00:25:12,111 And Balls and Shaft was forced to go underground. 542 00:25:12,211 --> 00:25:13,445 We lost our house, 543 00:25:13,580 --> 00:25:15,181 now the detestable sore known as the pit. 544 00:25:15,281 --> 00:25:18,250 Since then, our numbers have dwindled, 545 00:25:18,350 --> 00:25:21,253 but we're always on the lookout for new members. 546 00:25:21,353 --> 00:25:22,689 You guys used to be in the pit? 547 00:25:22,789 --> 00:25:24,090 Well, I know it's sad. 548 00:25:24,190 --> 00:25:27,293 The swine in there, they're dirty, stupid-- 549 00:25:27,594 --> 00:25:28,728 worst of all, 550 00:25:28,828 --> 00:25:29,762 poor. 551 00:25:29,862 --> 00:25:31,297 (Knock on door) 552 00:25:31,598 --> 00:25:33,065 I'll get it. 553 00:25:34,801 --> 00:25:36,603 America's greatest President. 554 00:25:36,669 --> 00:25:37,870 It's me, Rand. Open up. 555 00:25:37,970 --> 00:25:39,606 America's greatest President. 556 00:25:39,706 --> 00:25:40,940 Damn it. 557 00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:42,274 Who is Ronald Reagan? 558 00:25:42,374 --> 00:25:44,010 A casual shoe for yachting. 559 00:25:44,110 --> 00:25:46,478 What are you trying to figure out, B.D.? 560 00:25:46,613 --> 00:25:49,048 Who could I be? What is a blucher? 561 00:25:49,148 --> 00:25:50,449 They killed Jesus Christ. 562 00:25:50,617 --> 00:25:53,620 Who are the Jews? Open up, sucko! 563 00:25:58,024 --> 00:26:00,627 Gentlemen, I've got some good news, 564 00:26:00,693 --> 00:26:01,694 and I got some bad news. 565 00:26:01,794 --> 00:26:03,663 The bad news is... 566 00:26:04,697 --> 00:26:05,665 you're an idiot. 567 00:26:05,765 --> 00:26:08,500 Don't ever make me wait outside that door. 568 00:26:08,701 --> 00:26:09,936 The good news is... 569 00:26:10,036 --> 00:26:11,303 Thompson just delivered the information. 570 00:26:11,403 --> 00:26:12,739 By now, the pit will have started 571 00:26:12,839 --> 00:26:14,473 planning their little soiree. 572 00:26:14,674 --> 00:26:16,008 Well, about that, Rand-- 573 00:26:16,108 --> 00:26:17,877 What if their party does come off? 574 00:26:17,977 --> 00:26:20,947 Does anyone get what I'm doing here? 575 00:26:21,047 --> 00:26:22,314 Does anyone follow me? 576 00:26:22,414 --> 00:26:24,884 We want them to have a party, steakhead. 577 00:26:24,984 --> 00:26:26,052 We want them to have the loudest, 578 00:26:26,152 --> 00:26:27,119 most offensive party 579 00:26:27,219 --> 00:26:29,188 in school history. Capisce? 580 00:26:31,658 --> 00:26:32,491 Hi. 581 00:26:32,659 --> 00:26:35,061 Well, well, I see we have a new pledge. 582 00:26:35,161 --> 00:26:37,129 Mayflower material, I presume? 583 00:26:37,229 --> 00:26:38,430 Huh? 584 00:26:38,665 --> 00:26:39,699 It's a boat. 585 00:26:39,799 --> 00:26:42,201 Your ancestors obviously didn't come over on it. 586 00:26:42,301 --> 00:26:44,837 But, hey, it's the nineties. We'll take what we can get. 587 00:26:44,937 --> 00:26:47,339 Gentlemen, we got a job to do. 588 00:26:49,842 --> 00:26:51,811 Naugahyde Windpipe. 589 00:26:51,911 --> 00:26:53,512 Too metal. 590 00:26:53,680 --> 00:26:56,015 Oedipus and the Mama's Boys. 591 00:26:56,115 --> 00:26:57,784 Too college radio. 592 00:26:57,884 --> 00:27:01,754 My Johnson Is 12 Inches Long. 593 00:27:02,789 --> 00:27:03,990 Interesting, 594 00:27:04,090 --> 00:27:07,226 but doesn't sound like a band name. 595 00:27:08,127 --> 00:27:09,829 I've got it. 596 00:27:09,929 --> 00:27:11,563 Everyone Gets Laid. 597 00:27:11,698 --> 00:27:14,801 Katy, the Womynists will be all over us for that one. 598 00:27:14,901 --> 00:27:16,135 Ow. 599 00:27:16,235 --> 00:27:17,536 CEEL: Hey, Droz, what do you think about this? 600 00:27:17,704 --> 00:27:19,772 Tonight at the pit, Everyone Gets Laid. 601 00:27:19,872 --> 00:27:23,242 Hmm. That's tasteless, disgusting, and offensive. 602 00:27:23,342 --> 00:27:24,510 I like it. 603 00:27:24,777 --> 00:27:25,712 Cool. 604 00:27:25,778 --> 00:27:27,479 Daves, go make those fliers. 605 00:27:27,714 --> 00:27:29,315 Hey, 606 00:27:29,415 --> 00:27:30,582 what are you guys doing? 607 00:27:30,783 --> 00:27:32,184 Us? Oh, we're seniors. 608 00:27:32,284 --> 00:27:34,286 We're going to the game. 609 00:27:34,386 --> 00:27:35,454 Outside! 610 00:27:35,722 --> 00:27:36,823 Whoo! 611 00:27:36,923 --> 00:27:38,324 Uhh! Uhh! 612 00:27:43,730 --> 00:27:44,563 Hey. 613 00:27:44,731 --> 00:27:46,098 Remove that nail, butcher. 614 00:27:46,198 --> 00:27:47,566 What's your deal? 615 00:27:47,734 --> 00:27:49,068 I just heard that tree shriek. 616 00:27:49,168 --> 00:27:50,269 Would you like it if I nailed a sign 617 00:27:50,369 --> 00:27:52,338 into a layer of your fat? 618 00:27:52,438 --> 00:27:54,073 Try it again, and you're toast. 619 00:27:54,173 --> 00:27:56,375 Save the planet. Peace. 620 00:27:58,878 --> 00:28:01,047 This is a total drag. 621 00:28:01,147 --> 00:28:03,249 Let's give up, man. 622 00:28:13,059 --> 00:28:16,095 Well, what do we have here? 623 00:28:19,832 --> 00:28:20,833 Let's go! 624 00:28:20,933 --> 00:28:22,334 Whoo! 625 00:28:22,434 --> 00:28:27,239 Yeah, yeah. Look at him go! 626 00:28:30,777 --> 00:28:31,844 Pig. 627 00:28:33,345 --> 00:28:35,014 Oh, good, good God. 628 00:28:35,114 --> 00:28:36,015 Word up. 629 00:28:36,115 --> 00:28:38,317 She got a little stiff-arm. 630 00:28:38,417 --> 00:28:40,219 * Ending in dirty looks 631 00:28:40,319 --> 00:28:41,921 * Listenin' to the Muzak 632 00:28:42,021 --> 00:28:43,289 * Thinkin' 'bout this and that * 633 00:28:43,389 --> 00:28:45,191 * She said that's that 634 00:28:45,291 --> 00:28:46,893 * I don't want to chitter chat * 635 00:28:46,993 --> 00:28:48,795 * Turn it down a little bit * 636 00:28:48,861 --> 00:28:50,196 * Or turn it down flat 637 00:28:50,296 --> 00:28:51,630 * Pump it up 638 00:28:51,798 --> 00:28:54,867 * When you don't really need it... * 639 00:28:54,967 --> 00:28:56,402 Oh, wow, man. 640 00:28:56,502 --> 00:28:57,503 Ha! 641 00:28:57,804 --> 00:28:59,305 Hot shit! 642 00:29:04,010 --> 00:29:05,077 Yeah. 643 00:29:05,177 --> 00:29:07,880 Isn't that your old freshman roommate? 644 00:29:07,980 --> 00:29:08,915 Oh, yeah. 645 00:29:09,015 --> 00:29:10,316 Randall Peeburn McPherson. 646 00:29:10,416 --> 00:29:12,384 I wonder what brought him out of hiding. 647 00:29:12,484 --> 00:29:14,120 Must be a Klan meeting. 648 00:29:14,220 --> 00:29:15,421 Yeah. Man, look at him. 649 00:29:15,521 --> 00:29:17,523 Must have been hellish living with that guy 650 00:29:17,824 --> 00:29:19,158 for a year. 651 00:29:22,862 --> 00:29:24,897 (Woman laughing) 652 00:29:28,167 --> 00:29:30,369 Ahem. 653 00:29:30,469 --> 00:29:32,204 Ahem. 654 00:29:32,304 --> 00:29:34,040 Hey, wait, come back. 655 00:29:34,140 --> 00:29:36,042 Oh, come on! Go to sleep! 656 00:29:36,142 --> 00:29:37,343 Go to sleep! 657 00:29:37,443 --> 00:29:39,545 It's time to go to sleep! 658 00:29:39,846 --> 00:29:42,448 Oh, my God! Aah! 659 00:29:42,548 --> 00:29:43,649 Ah! Aah! 660 00:29:43,916 --> 00:29:44,984 Aah! 661 00:29:45,084 --> 00:29:47,086 Get away from me, you freak! 662 00:29:47,186 --> 00:29:49,388 Freak! 663 00:29:49,488 --> 00:29:52,558 Aah! Stay on your side! 664 00:29:52,859 --> 00:29:53,926 Aah! 665 00:29:55,294 --> 00:29:57,396 Total nightmare, man. 666 00:29:58,330 --> 00:30:01,800 What the hell is taking so long? 667 00:30:04,971 --> 00:30:08,174 ALL: Swirly. 668 00:30:08,274 --> 00:30:09,775 Whoo! 669 00:30:09,876 --> 00:30:12,979 The pride of the Port Chester sports program, Tom-- 670 00:30:13,079 --> 00:30:14,380 Hippie Olympics. 671 00:30:14,480 --> 00:30:17,016 Doesn't matter who wins 'cause they're all losers. 672 00:30:17,116 --> 00:30:19,151 You know, it's sad, really. 673 00:30:19,251 --> 00:30:20,987 This school used to be 674 00:30:21,087 --> 00:30:23,522 a bastion of rich, white elitism. 675 00:30:23,622 --> 00:30:27,826 Now...now there are homosexuals on the football team, 676 00:30:27,927 --> 00:30:30,062 whining minorities run the student government, 677 00:30:30,162 --> 00:30:32,298 and you can't even coerce a woman 678 00:30:32,398 --> 00:30:33,966 into having sex without being 679 00:30:34,066 --> 00:30:35,434 brought up on charges. 680 00:30:35,534 --> 00:30:37,003 What is this world coming to? 681 00:30:37,103 --> 00:30:38,004 Really! 682 00:30:38,104 --> 00:30:40,172 RAND: Come on. Let's go. 683 00:30:40,272 --> 00:30:41,373 My pappy would puke 684 00:30:41,473 --> 00:30:43,275 if he saw this bunch of bug-eyed toads 685 00:30:43,375 --> 00:30:45,544 chasing a scrap of plastic around. 686 00:30:45,644 --> 00:30:47,646 Hey, ponytails, you suck! 687 00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:49,415 Hi. 688 00:30:49,515 --> 00:30:52,218 We're getting housed here, guys. 689 00:30:52,318 --> 00:30:54,987 I say we bring in Blotter. 690 00:30:55,087 --> 00:30:57,023 Blotter. Blotter. 691 00:30:57,123 --> 00:31:00,392 Yeah. Yeah. 692 00:31:02,194 --> 00:31:04,396 (Whistles) 693 00:31:18,110 --> 00:31:21,080 Wha-whoo, yeah, Blotter! 694 00:31:21,180 --> 00:31:23,382 Oh, you're just bugging me! 695 00:31:24,250 --> 00:31:25,351 * Pump it up 696 00:31:25,451 --> 00:31:27,954 * Until you can feel it 697 00:31:28,020 --> 00:31:29,188 * Pump it up 698 00:31:29,288 --> 00:31:31,390 * When you don't really need it * 699 00:31:31,490 --> 00:31:32,624 Uh-oh. This is me. 700 00:31:32,724 --> 00:31:35,027 I'm going in, Coach. Cover me, man. 701 00:31:35,127 --> 00:31:37,563 Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Yeah. 702 00:31:41,200 --> 00:31:42,301 Sam? 703 00:31:42,401 --> 00:31:43,835 Hey. Wow! 704 00:31:44,036 --> 00:31:45,104 What are the odds? 705 00:31:45,204 --> 00:31:47,339 Droz. Two times in one day. 706 00:31:47,439 --> 00:31:48,640 What's come over you? 707 00:31:48,740 --> 00:31:50,009 I don't know, must be hormonal. 708 00:31:50,109 --> 00:31:52,444 WOMYNIST: What the hell is he doing here? 709 00:31:52,544 --> 00:31:53,479 Afternoon, ladies. 710 00:31:53,579 --> 00:31:55,081 Looking good out there. 711 00:31:55,181 --> 00:31:56,615 Yeah. Whatever. 712 00:31:58,584 --> 00:32:00,486 They're not going to castrate me 713 00:32:00,586 --> 00:32:01,988 for sitting here, are they? 714 00:32:02,054 --> 00:32:04,991 Yeah, that's what they got planned for halftime. 715 00:32:07,359 --> 00:32:10,329 Oh. Now, look who it is. 716 00:32:10,429 --> 00:32:12,999 Meat tosser! 717 00:32:16,002 --> 00:32:17,136 Aah! 718 00:32:17,236 --> 00:32:18,204 Aah! 719 00:32:18,304 --> 00:32:21,007 Jesus Christ. I know that kid. 720 00:32:21,107 --> 00:32:22,674 What is he doing? 721 00:32:24,043 --> 00:32:26,012 I'm open. 722 00:32:26,112 --> 00:32:27,779 Aah! Ohh! 723 00:32:28,014 --> 00:32:30,016 Hey. 724 00:32:32,651 --> 00:32:35,721 That weasel snagged the 'bee. 725 00:32:36,022 --> 00:32:37,389 All right. 726 00:32:37,489 --> 00:32:39,691 Bong hits, anyone? 727 00:32:41,027 --> 00:32:42,261 All right. 728 00:32:42,361 --> 00:32:44,663 So, I heard you're finally graduating. 729 00:32:44,763 --> 00:32:46,598 Yeah, yeah. It's pretty stupid, huh? 730 00:32:46,698 --> 00:32:49,568 I mean, how could I leave all this? 731 00:32:49,668 --> 00:32:51,703 What about you? You got any plans? 732 00:32:51,803 --> 00:32:53,639 RAND: James Andrews, my old friend. 733 00:32:53,739 --> 00:32:54,673 Hey, Rand. 734 00:32:54,773 --> 00:32:56,608 Samantha, my buttercup. 735 00:32:56,708 --> 00:32:59,245 I hear you're having a party tonight. 736 00:32:59,345 --> 00:33:00,479 Can't go. 737 00:33:00,579 --> 00:33:02,214 But we're all taking bets 738 00:33:02,314 --> 00:33:04,216 on how many of you will get arrested. 739 00:33:04,316 --> 00:33:05,317 You remember this guy, 740 00:33:05,417 --> 00:33:06,418 he skippered Hitler's catamaran 741 00:33:06,518 --> 00:33:07,519 during the war? 742 00:33:07,619 --> 00:33:08,654 Yeah, yuck it up now, dipshit. 743 00:33:08,754 --> 00:33:10,456 Your nightmare's just beginning. 744 00:33:10,556 --> 00:33:13,092 I think the Womynists will be quite interested 745 00:33:13,192 --> 00:33:14,426 in your little scribblings. 746 00:33:14,526 --> 00:33:15,627 Oh, yeah, 747 00:33:15,727 --> 00:33:17,496 that's where I'm headed. 748 00:33:17,596 --> 00:33:20,766 Samantha, always a pleasure. 749 00:33:21,067 --> 00:33:22,134 See you. 750 00:33:24,303 --> 00:33:26,072 Gentlemen. 751 00:33:28,440 --> 00:33:30,076 Ladies. 752 00:33:33,579 --> 00:33:34,646 A pit party. 753 00:33:34,746 --> 00:33:37,449 Mmm. Warm, flat beer. 754 00:33:37,549 --> 00:33:40,252 Soggy chips. Think about that. 755 00:33:40,352 --> 00:33:43,589 It's just what I need to help me figure out my life. 756 00:33:43,689 --> 00:33:45,491 Stop the penis party! 757 00:33:45,591 --> 00:33:47,359 Get her away from him! 758 00:33:47,459 --> 00:33:48,894 Come on, Sam! 759 00:33:49,128 --> 00:33:50,096 Let's go. 760 00:33:50,129 --> 00:33:51,363 Hey, Sam, what about tonight? 761 00:33:51,463 --> 00:33:53,865 Don't talk to him. 762 00:33:54,133 --> 00:33:55,567 Shit. 763 00:33:55,667 --> 00:33:57,936 Whoo-hoo! Yeah-heh! 764 00:33:58,170 --> 00:34:00,172 (Honks horn) 765 00:34:01,407 --> 00:34:02,308 (Honks horn) 766 00:34:02,408 --> 00:34:05,177 Hey, watch it, you schmuck! 767 00:34:07,513 --> 00:34:10,416 Get the beer. Just get the beer. 768 00:34:10,516 --> 00:34:12,418 Get the beer. 769 00:34:12,518 --> 00:34:14,220 The beer. 770 00:34:17,323 --> 00:34:18,390 Excuse me. 771 00:34:18,490 --> 00:34:21,793 Can you blow me where the pampers is? 772 00:34:23,162 --> 00:34:24,130 What? 773 00:34:24,163 --> 00:34:27,133 Can you blow me where the pampers is? 774 00:34:30,636 --> 00:34:32,371 Can you show me 775 00:34:32,471 --> 00:34:36,208 where the campus is?! 776 00:34:37,376 --> 00:34:38,810 Yeah. Sure. 777 00:34:44,216 --> 00:34:46,318 She knows. 778 00:34:46,418 --> 00:34:47,853 She knows. 779 00:34:48,154 --> 00:34:49,155 OK. 780 00:34:49,188 --> 00:34:53,559 Just...just go here for a minute. 781 00:34:54,693 --> 00:34:57,163 I shouldn't have smoked that. 782 00:34:57,829 --> 00:35:00,999 MAN: I just want to pay tribute 783 00:35:01,200 --> 00:35:03,469 to both your courage 784 00:35:03,569 --> 00:35:06,172 and for your eloquence 785 00:35:06,205 --> 00:35:09,708 and for the dignity in which you've conducted yourself. 786 00:35:09,808 --> 00:35:11,743 Thank you, Senator. 787 00:35:11,843 --> 00:35:14,380 I knew it was going to be bad 788 00:35:14,480 --> 00:35:15,547 when I was nominated. 789 00:35:15,647 --> 00:35:17,683 I didn't know it would be this bad. 790 00:35:17,783 --> 00:35:20,186 Could you have guessed... 791 00:35:20,286 --> 00:35:24,190 that some people, including people on this committee, 792 00:35:24,256 --> 00:35:27,793 would dredge up stories about drug use? 793 00:35:30,596 --> 00:35:32,030 Wait. Wait. Wait a second, 794 00:35:32,198 --> 00:35:34,266 gentlemen of the courtroom, 795 00:35:34,366 --> 00:35:37,336 this guy is Gutter, man. 796 00:35:37,436 --> 00:35:39,004 The Gut man. 797 00:35:39,205 --> 00:35:40,038 He comes over, man, 798 00:35:40,206 --> 00:35:42,040 he smokes two major bong loads... 799 00:35:42,208 --> 00:35:44,075 he knows how to carb and everything. 800 00:35:44,210 --> 00:35:46,678 Like, loads the size of your head, man. 801 00:35:46,778 --> 00:35:49,315 I...I didn't exhale? 802 00:35:49,415 --> 00:35:52,384 (Laughing) 803 00:35:52,484 --> 00:35:53,652 Works for me. 804 00:35:53,752 --> 00:35:55,020 Good answer. 805 00:35:55,254 --> 00:35:57,356 (Coughs) 806 00:35:58,424 --> 00:36:00,359 (Whimpering) 807 00:36:05,364 --> 00:36:07,433 Oh, man. What a nightmare. 808 00:36:07,533 --> 00:36:09,268 Oh, man. 809 00:36:09,368 --> 00:36:13,239 Oh. Oh. Oh. 810 00:36:14,340 --> 00:36:16,808 Oh, shit! The beer! 811 00:36:16,908 --> 00:36:19,245 Oh, shit! 812 00:36:31,957 --> 00:36:34,893 WOMAN: Are we talking about the same person? 813 00:36:34,993 --> 00:36:37,496 GARCIA: Well, I think Bisexual Asian Studies 814 00:36:37,596 --> 00:36:39,498 should have its own building. 815 00:36:39,598 --> 00:36:40,866 The question is, who goes: 816 00:36:40,966 --> 00:36:43,269 the Math department or the hockey team? 817 00:36:43,335 --> 00:36:45,537 Excuse me, Andrea-- 818 00:36:45,637 --> 00:36:46,705 It's Andrea. 819 00:36:46,805 --> 00:36:50,676 I think hockey. Call me about it. 820 00:36:50,776 --> 00:36:53,279 The board of trustees is very concerned 821 00:36:53,345 --> 00:36:55,747 about the state of unrest among the students. 822 00:36:55,847 --> 00:36:57,816 There has been a protest on this campus 823 00:36:57,916 --> 00:36:59,518 every day, and frankly, 824 00:36:59,618 --> 00:37:02,020 we're sick of all the bad publicity. 825 00:37:02,288 --> 00:37:03,389 Oh, really? 826 00:37:03,489 --> 00:37:04,823 We're particularly concerned 827 00:37:04,923 --> 00:37:06,292 about tomorrow's bicentennial. 828 00:37:06,358 --> 00:37:09,395 It will be the most highly attended 829 00:37:09,495 --> 00:37:11,397 alumni event in years. 830 00:37:11,497 --> 00:37:12,798 Gentlemen, relax. 831 00:37:12,898 --> 00:37:15,367 Tomorrow's ceremony has been planned to perfection. 832 00:37:15,467 --> 00:37:16,668 And as for the students, 833 00:37:16,768 --> 00:37:18,837 I have a special surprise for them. 834 00:37:18,937 --> 00:37:20,772 What are you talking about? 835 00:37:20,872 --> 00:37:22,408 I'm going to announce 836 00:37:22,508 --> 00:37:24,310 the changing of the school mascot 837 00:37:24,343 --> 00:37:26,778 from the offensive Port Chester Indian 838 00:37:26,878 --> 00:37:28,980 to an endangered specie. 839 00:37:32,518 --> 00:37:34,720 Gentlemen, meet our new mascot, 840 00:37:34,820 --> 00:37:37,323 the Port Chester Whooping Crane. 841 00:37:38,490 --> 00:37:41,327 (Cooing) 842 00:37:42,828 --> 00:37:44,496 No. Wait. No! 843 00:37:44,596 --> 00:37:46,898 Look, jerky, no liquor sold after 8:00. 844 00:37:46,998 --> 00:37:48,600 Connecticut blue laws. 845 00:37:48,700 --> 00:37:52,003 After 8:00? I missed my ride to the show! 846 00:38:01,913 --> 00:38:04,416 Hey, look. It's a college boy. 847 00:38:04,516 --> 00:38:06,418 Anybody want to beat him up? 848 00:38:06,518 --> 00:38:08,186 (Laughing) 849 00:38:08,420 --> 00:38:09,355 Nice tie. 850 00:38:09,455 --> 00:38:11,790 This totally bites. 851 00:38:11,890 --> 00:38:13,359 The first time we've ever been asked 852 00:38:13,459 --> 00:38:15,761 to play in public, and there's no public. 853 00:38:15,861 --> 00:38:17,763 Yankees are back in town. 854 00:38:23,435 --> 00:38:25,371 Fuse box. 855 00:38:34,713 --> 00:38:35,747 Aah! 856 00:38:35,847 --> 00:38:37,883 Pins and needles! 857 00:38:37,983 --> 00:38:41,420 Ooh! Pins and needles. Pins and needles. 858 00:38:46,992 --> 00:38:50,095 RAJ: Hey, guys, you knocked the plug out. Hello. 859 00:38:50,396 --> 00:38:51,229 Hey, Raj. 860 00:38:51,397 --> 00:38:53,131 Hey, Daves, what happened to the fliers? 861 00:38:53,399 --> 00:38:54,400 Huh? 862 00:38:54,466 --> 00:38:56,835 They fliers, I haven't seen one up on campus. 863 00:38:56,935 --> 00:38:58,404 We put one up. 864 00:38:58,504 --> 00:38:59,471 Damn, man. 865 00:38:59,571 --> 00:39:00,672 One flier? 866 00:39:00,772 --> 00:39:02,608 We're screwed. 867 00:39:02,708 --> 00:39:05,644 There is one thing we can still do. 868 00:39:05,744 --> 00:39:07,679 Play some loud and abusive tunes? 869 00:39:07,779 --> 00:39:08,714 Exactly. 870 00:39:08,814 --> 00:39:09,748 Do it, man. All right. 871 00:39:09,848 --> 00:39:11,417 Plug my ass in. 872 00:39:21,092 --> 00:39:22,894 Yeah. 873 00:39:23,895 --> 00:39:25,631 (Chuckling) 874 00:39:25,731 --> 00:39:27,566 Yeah. 875 00:39:27,666 --> 00:39:30,802 Play Metallica, and they will come. 876 00:39:30,902 --> 00:39:34,105 We should've handled our own publicity. 877 00:40:10,609 --> 00:40:12,310 MAN: Whooping cranes. 878 00:40:12,410 --> 00:40:15,313 Garcia-Thompson's making sandwiches without bread. 879 00:40:15,413 --> 00:40:17,716 That bitch is giving me gout. 880 00:40:17,816 --> 00:40:19,818 Look, just be patient, Cordeau. 881 00:40:19,918 --> 00:40:22,053 The way she's going, she'll hang herself. 882 00:40:22,153 --> 00:40:25,491 I'll buy the rope, you find the tree. 883 00:40:26,424 --> 00:40:27,993 I'm just one man talking, 884 00:40:28,093 --> 00:40:30,629 but I don't get this whole James Bond/Rasta-- 885 00:40:30,729 --> 00:40:31,630 Hey, I want to know 886 00:40:31,730 --> 00:40:32,698 how this became about me 887 00:40:32,798 --> 00:40:33,765 all of a sudden? 888 00:40:33,865 --> 00:40:34,800 (People yelling) 889 00:40:34,900 --> 00:40:36,101 This is a miracle. 890 00:40:36,201 --> 00:40:38,537 Monkeys pulled it off. 891 00:40:42,941 --> 00:40:44,776 What the hell's going on here? 892 00:40:44,876 --> 00:40:46,878 Hi, Droz. 893 00:40:46,978 --> 00:40:49,214 Are we having a party tonight or what? 894 00:40:49,314 --> 00:40:51,617 There's no publicity, so there's no people. 895 00:40:51,717 --> 00:40:53,451 Gutter never showed up, so there's no beer, 896 00:40:53,552 --> 00:40:55,120 our instruments blew out, so there's no band, 897 00:40:55,220 --> 00:40:57,823 and I think Raji and Deege may be dead. 898 00:40:57,923 --> 00:41:00,091 Wait a minute-- no beer? 899 00:41:00,191 --> 00:41:01,459 Well, where the hell's Gutter? 900 00:41:01,560 --> 00:41:03,094 Probably in a parking lot somewhere 901 00:41:03,194 --> 00:41:04,730 picking his nose. 902 00:41:06,532 --> 00:41:08,366 Well, there's one consolation. 903 00:41:08,600 --> 00:41:09,735 What's that? 904 00:41:09,835 --> 00:41:11,570 We haven't been protested yet. 905 00:41:11,670 --> 00:41:14,205 Does anybody know why there are 24 Womynists 906 00:41:14,305 --> 00:41:16,074 beating bongos on our lawn? 907 00:41:16,174 --> 00:41:18,744 Stop this phallic oppression at this house... 908 00:41:18,844 --> 00:41:20,045 What? 909 00:41:20,145 --> 00:41:21,780 Let's check it out. 910 00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:23,048 Yeah, man. Coming through. 911 00:41:23,148 --> 00:41:24,282 Coming through. 912 00:41:24,550 --> 00:41:26,017 Hey. 913 00:41:26,952 --> 00:41:28,554 All right. Deadly zulu drum protest. 914 00:41:28,654 --> 00:41:31,823 Haven't seen one of those since my third sophomore year. 915 00:41:31,923 --> 00:41:33,124 Full-on response. 916 00:41:33,224 --> 00:41:35,060 Wish the balls weren't dead. 917 00:41:35,160 --> 00:41:36,562 See, you try and spread joy, 918 00:41:36,628 --> 00:41:39,430 and then the PC shock troops just shut you down. 919 00:41:39,565 --> 00:41:40,932 KATY: Don't they want to have a good time 920 00:41:41,032 --> 00:41:43,569 at least once in their lives? 921 00:41:46,204 --> 00:41:48,674 That's a damn good point. 922 00:41:49,975 --> 00:41:52,177 OK. Now, it's true 923 00:41:52,277 --> 00:41:53,444 the majority of students today 924 00:41:53,645 --> 00:41:55,046 are so cravenly PC, 925 00:41:55,146 --> 00:41:56,181 they wouldn't know a good time 926 00:41:56,281 --> 00:41:57,583 if it was sitting on their face, 927 00:41:57,683 --> 00:41:59,918 but there's one thing 928 00:42:00,018 --> 00:42:03,421 that will always unite us and them. 929 00:42:03,655 --> 00:42:04,923 They're young. 930 00:42:05,023 --> 00:42:07,158 They may not realise it yet. 931 00:42:07,258 --> 00:42:08,827 They've got the same raging hormones, 932 00:42:08,927 --> 00:42:11,162 the same self-destructive desire 933 00:42:11,262 --> 00:42:14,165 to get boldly trashed and wildly out of control. 934 00:42:14,265 --> 00:42:15,834 Look out that window. 935 00:42:15,934 --> 00:42:17,969 That's not a protest. 936 00:42:18,069 --> 00:42:20,171 That is a cry for help. 937 00:42:20,271 --> 00:42:21,907 CHANTING: Stop the penis party! 938 00:42:22,007 --> 00:42:23,474 Stop the penis party! 939 00:42:23,675 --> 00:42:24,876 They're begging us... 940 00:42:24,976 --> 00:42:26,945 please have a party! 941 00:42:27,045 --> 00:42:28,614 Feed us drinks! 942 00:42:28,714 --> 00:42:30,616 Get us laid! 943 00:42:30,682 --> 00:42:32,450 Aah! 944 00:42:32,618 --> 00:42:35,220 DAVE: That's a pretty strange theory, Droz. 945 00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:36,454 Yeah. 946 00:42:36,622 --> 00:42:37,923 Besides, we don't have a band 947 00:42:38,023 --> 00:42:38,924 or any people, man. 948 00:42:39,024 --> 00:42:40,491 We don't have any beer. 949 00:42:40,626 --> 00:42:43,228 We've got loose keg sightings near the freshman dorm, 950 00:42:43,328 --> 00:42:45,731 two cases of zinfandel spotted near the faculty club, 951 00:42:45,831 --> 00:42:49,467 and here, the mother lode-- the bicentennial ball. 952 00:42:49,635 --> 00:42:51,002 Moles, you're on the air in 10. 953 00:42:51,102 --> 00:42:52,037 Got it! 954 00:42:52,137 --> 00:42:53,471 Ceel, you're on bongos. 955 00:42:53,639 --> 00:42:55,641 Me, Dave, and Dave are on beer. 956 00:42:55,741 --> 00:42:57,676 Katy, you're a freshman. 957 00:42:57,776 --> 00:43:00,178 Find 2,000 people. 958 00:43:01,112 --> 00:43:02,313 RAND: Hey. 959 00:43:02,413 --> 00:43:04,249 GARCIA: It's about time the university 960 00:43:04,349 --> 00:43:06,317 embraced multiculturalism. 961 00:43:06,652 --> 00:43:07,418 Hey. 962 00:43:07,653 --> 00:43:09,254 It really is. 963 00:43:10,889 --> 00:43:11,890 Excuse me. 964 00:43:11,990 --> 00:43:13,324 Uh-huh. 965 00:43:15,927 --> 00:43:18,129 What is the complaint count now? 966 00:43:18,229 --> 00:43:19,164 Hello, Andrea. 967 00:43:19,264 --> 00:43:21,132 Only 3 this afternoon, 968 00:43:21,232 --> 00:43:22,934 but my Community Crisis Bulletin 969 00:43:23,034 --> 00:43:24,803 just went out. OK? 970 00:43:24,903 --> 00:43:26,705 Well, don't worry, my fair maiden, 971 00:43:26,805 --> 00:43:28,106 we will get our quota. 972 00:43:28,206 --> 00:43:29,908 And by the way, 973 00:43:30,008 --> 00:43:32,778 have you seen their tasteless flier? 974 00:43:35,013 --> 00:43:38,116 Oh, my God. 975 00:43:38,216 --> 00:43:40,351 Is there no limit? 976 00:43:40,451 --> 00:43:44,289 Well...what I figure they did... 977 00:43:44,389 --> 00:43:46,291 was they cut out a picture of your head 978 00:43:46,391 --> 00:43:48,694 and pasted it on another different picture. 979 00:43:48,794 --> 00:43:52,330 I've done a little collage work myself. 980 00:43:56,835 --> 00:43:58,203 B.D., do me a favour 981 00:43:58,303 --> 00:44:00,105 and don't ever talk. 982 00:44:00,205 --> 00:44:02,708 (Horn honks) 983 00:44:05,443 --> 00:44:07,946 Hey, kid, do you know how to get back 984 00:44:08,046 --> 00:44:09,280 to I-84? 985 00:44:09,380 --> 00:44:10,982 Where you going, Hartford? 986 00:44:11,082 --> 00:44:12,884 Yeah, man, we got a concert there. 987 00:44:12,984 --> 00:44:14,619 We should have been there at 8:00. 988 00:44:14,720 --> 00:44:17,088 I know. The Merkins and Frog and Toad. 989 00:44:17,188 --> 00:44:18,156 What? 990 00:44:18,256 --> 00:44:19,257 The bad news is, 991 00:44:19,357 --> 00:44:21,159 84 is, like, a half-hour away, 992 00:44:21,259 --> 00:44:22,427 and then Hartford is, 993 00:44:22,527 --> 00:44:24,429 like, another 45 minutes on the freeway. 994 00:44:24,529 --> 00:44:27,132 Seth, I told you we should have followed the other bus. 995 00:44:27,232 --> 00:44:28,233 We'll never make it now. 996 00:44:28,333 --> 00:44:29,267 We might as well go on back home. 997 00:44:29,367 --> 00:44:31,302 Yo, dread. Yeah, what's up? 998 00:44:31,402 --> 00:44:32,804 Since you missed the show anyway, 999 00:44:32,904 --> 00:44:34,305 you think you could give me a ride back to my house? 1000 00:44:34,405 --> 00:44:36,107 Yeah. Come on. Get on up. 1001 00:44:36,207 --> 00:44:37,776 Shotgun. 1002 00:44:39,044 --> 00:44:40,946 DAVE: Which one's Rand's? 1003 00:44:41,046 --> 00:44:43,014 Cherry beemer. "Thanks, Dad." 1004 00:44:43,114 --> 00:44:44,916 I can wire it. Can you get us in? 1005 00:44:45,016 --> 00:44:48,119 It might take a little time, but... 1006 00:44:48,219 --> 00:44:49,755 Yeah. I think so. 1007 00:44:49,821 --> 00:44:52,290 MAN: that was George Clinton on WPCU 1008 00:44:52,390 --> 00:44:53,591 with Tear the Roof Off. 1009 00:44:53,759 --> 00:44:55,426 Clinton's headlining the Civic tonight, 1010 00:44:55,526 --> 00:44:58,296 but you can't afford a ticket, man. Sorry. 1011 00:44:58,396 --> 00:45:01,232 Moles. How's it going, brother? 1012 00:45:01,332 --> 00:45:02,968 What's up? Great show, man. 1013 00:45:03,068 --> 00:45:04,202 Thanks, man. 1014 00:45:04,302 --> 00:45:06,337 No, really. Listen, I got a favour to ask... 1015 00:45:08,774 --> 00:45:10,375 Well, that's good thinking. 1016 00:45:15,080 --> 00:45:16,014 Oh. 1017 00:45:16,114 --> 00:45:17,983 Ooh. 1018 00:45:18,083 --> 00:45:19,017 Eek. 1019 00:45:19,117 --> 00:45:20,986 Ah... 1020 00:45:30,195 --> 00:45:31,997 Toss 'em in back. 1021 00:45:38,436 --> 00:45:40,806 Sunroof. All right. 1022 00:45:42,107 --> 00:45:43,274 Rand's going to griz his pants 1023 00:45:43,374 --> 00:45:44,609 when he sees his car. 1024 00:45:44,843 --> 00:45:45,877 You think so? 1025 00:45:45,977 --> 00:45:49,314 MOLES: Good evening. We interrupt this broadcast 1026 00:45:49,414 --> 00:45:51,649 for a special announcement. 1027 00:45:51,817 --> 00:45:54,319 Are you just sitting around your dorm rooms 1028 00:45:54,419 --> 00:45:56,554 playing cards and eating pizza? 1029 00:45:56,654 --> 00:45:58,489 Now, is this the way you've spent the majority 1030 00:45:58,589 --> 00:46:00,091 of your 4 years in college? 1031 00:46:00,191 --> 00:46:01,459 Would you like tonight to be different, 1032 00:46:01,559 --> 00:46:03,128 you just don't have anyplace to go? 1033 00:46:03,228 --> 00:46:04,429 Well, now you do. 1034 00:46:04,529 --> 00:46:06,832 So, turn off your radios and head on over. 1035 00:46:06,898 --> 00:46:09,367 And tonight, 10 P.M. at the pit, 1036 00:46:09,467 --> 00:46:12,503 Everyone Gets Laid. 1037 00:46:21,880 --> 00:46:23,982 (Yelling) 1038 00:46:36,962 --> 00:46:38,930 K-Katy? 1039 00:46:39,030 --> 00:46:40,365 Katy! 1040 00:46:41,466 --> 00:46:44,435 It's the pre-frosh. 1041 00:46:44,535 --> 00:46:46,537 Stay! 1042 00:46:52,944 --> 00:46:54,245 Hi. Hey. 1043 00:46:54,345 --> 00:46:55,881 We were wondering what happened to you. 1044 00:46:55,947 --> 00:46:57,482 Where you going? 1045 00:46:57,582 --> 00:46:59,985 Uh, I'm gonna go home. 1046 00:47:00,085 --> 00:47:01,719 You're leaving? 1047 00:47:01,887 --> 00:47:04,455 You've only been here, like, 10 minutes. 1048 00:47:04,555 --> 00:47:05,756 I know, but, you know, 1049 00:47:05,891 --> 00:47:07,258 I've already managed to piss off, like, 1050 00:47:07,358 --> 00:47:08,393 the entire campus. 1051 00:47:08,493 --> 00:47:09,494 I mean, no offence, Katy, 1052 00:47:09,594 --> 00:47:11,562 but this place is a nightmare. 1053 00:47:11,662 --> 00:47:14,399 I'm probably just gonna wind up at State. 1054 00:47:14,499 --> 00:47:17,102 Yeah, well, we're all gonna be 1055 00:47:17,202 --> 00:47:18,403 boring our butts off at State 1056 00:47:18,503 --> 00:47:20,338 if I don't find, like, 1,000 people pronto. 1057 00:47:20,438 --> 00:47:22,007 What do you mean? 1058 00:47:22,107 --> 00:47:23,274 We gotta raise 7 Gs by tomorrow, 1059 00:47:23,374 --> 00:47:24,275 or we lose the house. 1060 00:47:24,375 --> 00:47:25,944 The pit? Yeah. 1061 00:47:26,044 --> 00:47:27,278 The damage bill came in. 1062 00:47:27,378 --> 00:47:29,080 We're trying to pull off this all-campus rage, 1063 00:47:29,180 --> 00:47:30,916 and I gotta get people. 1064 00:47:30,982 --> 00:47:34,419 All I got are these foreign exchange students. 1065 00:47:38,523 --> 00:47:40,225 It's looking pretty grim. 1066 00:47:40,325 --> 00:47:41,359 I can't believe this. 1067 00:47:41,459 --> 00:47:42,493 I mean, you're, like, the only ones 1068 00:47:42,593 --> 00:47:43,761 that haven't tried to kill me 1069 00:47:43,962 --> 00:47:45,596 since I got here. 1070 00:47:45,696 --> 00:47:48,066 Yeah, but you're probably not going to be 1071 00:47:48,166 --> 00:47:50,201 coming here anyway, so... 1072 00:47:50,301 --> 00:47:51,937 don't sweat it. 1073 00:47:52,037 --> 00:47:54,072 (Horn honks) 1074 00:47:54,172 --> 00:47:57,342 Oh...your ride's here. 1075 00:47:58,243 --> 00:47:59,978 It was nice knowing you. 1076 00:48:22,167 --> 00:48:23,468 Katy! 1077 00:48:27,172 --> 00:48:29,507 You said you needed people, right? 1078 00:48:29,607 --> 00:48:32,143 DROZ: Am I OK on that side? 1079 00:48:32,243 --> 00:48:33,544 Nope. No. 1080 00:48:37,215 --> 00:48:38,583 That's good. 1081 00:48:40,285 --> 00:48:42,453 Hey. Hey! 1082 00:48:55,733 --> 00:48:58,603 I'll take care of Apeman. You grab the bar. 1083 00:49:01,039 --> 00:49:02,840 Hey there, B.D. 1084 00:49:03,008 --> 00:49:05,410 Andrews. You're not supposed to be here. 1085 00:49:05,510 --> 00:49:07,012 Hey, now, that is one great tie. 1086 00:49:07,078 --> 00:49:09,047 Is that yours, or did you borrow it? 1087 00:49:09,147 --> 00:49:10,381 It's mine. 1088 00:49:10,481 --> 00:49:11,916 Really? That is amazing. Where did you get that? 1089 00:49:12,017 --> 00:49:13,584 because I've been looking for something like this. 1090 00:49:13,684 --> 00:49:15,053 What are those? Those little snails? 1091 00:49:15,153 --> 00:49:16,354 They're jockeys. 1092 00:49:16,454 --> 00:49:19,457 Really? 'Cause, uh, they look like snails. 1093 00:49:19,557 --> 00:49:23,094 Listen, uh, what kind of beer do you got? 1094 00:49:23,194 --> 00:49:24,595 Uh, well, we don't have-- 1095 00:49:24,695 --> 00:49:25,696 You know, on second thought, 1096 00:49:25,796 --> 00:49:26,897 what am I doing? I'm driving. 1097 00:49:27,032 --> 00:49:28,733 Make it a scotch on the rocks. 1098 00:49:29,034 --> 00:49:29,800 What? 1099 00:49:30,035 --> 00:49:31,202 You're right. 1100 00:49:31,302 --> 00:49:32,303 You're a good friend, B.D. 1101 00:49:32,403 --> 00:49:34,205 You saved my life. I mean that. 1102 00:49:34,305 --> 00:49:35,573 You're a hell of a guy. 1103 00:49:35,673 --> 00:49:38,076 I'm never going to forget this. 1104 00:49:39,710 --> 00:49:41,246 Pardon me. Excuse me. 1105 00:49:41,346 --> 00:49:45,050 Say, you know, there's a very interesting studies group... 1106 00:49:49,320 --> 00:49:51,156 MAN: A vodka tonic, please. 1107 00:49:53,524 --> 00:49:56,261 DROZ: 99, repeat. 1108 00:50:04,202 --> 00:50:05,136 Hi. 1109 00:50:05,236 --> 00:50:07,138 (Music plays loudly) 1110 00:50:10,275 --> 00:50:11,576 * Gonna find my baby 1111 00:50:11,676 --> 00:50:13,078 * Gonna hold her tight 1112 00:50:13,178 --> 00:50:17,248 * Gonna grab some afternoon delight * 1113 00:50:18,216 --> 00:50:21,686 Last time I saw them, they were over here. 1114 00:50:27,425 --> 00:50:28,559 Brothers. 1115 00:50:28,659 --> 00:50:30,561 I saw him at the cafeteria this morning. 1116 00:50:30,661 --> 00:50:31,796 He was recruiting for the CIA. 1117 00:50:32,029 --> 00:50:33,030 CIA, huh?! 1118 00:50:33,131 --> 00:50:34,932 I heard he injected all the meat with hormones 1119 00:50:35,032 --> 00:50:36,767 before throwing it off the roof. 1120 00:50:36,867 --> 00:50:38,569 He is wearing brown shoes 1121 00:50:38,669 --> 00:50:39,670 with a blue blazer. 1122 00:50:39,770 --> 00:50:40,838 I mean, can you believe it? 1123 00:50:41,072 --> 00:50:41,972 How hinge! 1124 00:50:42,073 --> 00:50:43,374 KATY: What are they so pissed off at? 1125 00:50:43,474 --> 00:50:44,542 Watch this. 1126 00:50:44,642 --> 00:50:47,212 Hey, butt-licks! 1127 00:50:47,312 --> 00:50:49,046 Shh. 1128 00:50:50,081 --> 00:50:51,216 Remember me? 1129 00:50:51,316 --> 00:50:52,417 Jesus Christ, Tom! 1130 00:50:52,517 --> 00:50:53,551 That's the guy! 1131 00:50:53,651 --> 00:50:56,387 (Yelling) 1132 00:50:56,487 --> 00:50:58,055 Let's go! 1133 00:51:04,229 --> 00:51:06,697 CHANTING: This penis party's got to go. 1134 00:51:06,797 --> 00:51:08,366 Hey hey. Ho ho. 1135 00:51:08,466 --> 00:51:10,501 This penis party's got to go. 1136 00:51:10,601 --> 00:51:12,237 Hey hey. Ho ho. 1137 00:51:12,337 --> 00:51:14,305 This penis party's got to go. 1138 00:51:14,405 --> 00:51:15,973 Hey hey. Ho ho. 1139 00:51:16,141 --> 00:51:18,309 This penis party's got to go. 1140 00:51:18,409 --> 00:51:20,211 Hey hey. Ho ho. 1141 00:51:20,311 --> 00:51:22,413 This penis party's got to go. 1142 00:51:22,513 --> 00:51:24,249 Hey hey. Ho ho. 1143 00:51:24,349 --> 00:51:25,250 This penis party's... 1144 00:51:25,350 --> 00:51:27,485 * Kumbaya 1145 00:51:27,585 --> 00:51:31,456 * Kumbaya, my lord 1146 00:51:31,556 --> 00:51:35,560 * Kumbaya 1147 00:51:35,660 --> 00:51:37,495 * Kumbaya Everybody! 1148 00:51:37,595 --> 00:51:39,330 * My lord 1149 00:51:39,430 --> 00:51:42,933 * Kumbaya 1150 00:51:43,168 --> 00:51:45,170 * Oh, lord * 1151 00:51:45,270 --> 00:51:47,438 * Kumbaya 1152 00:51:47,538 --> 00:51:51,709 * Kumbaya, my lord... 1153 00:51:57,582 --> 00:51:59,517 Droz. Droz, 1154 00:51:59,617 --> 00:52:00,718 what are we going to do 1155 00:52:00,818 --> 00:52:02,187 when we don't pull this one off? 1156 00:52:02,287 --> 00:52:04,189 Uh, bake sale? 1157 00:52:04,289 --> 00:52:06,324 GUTTER: What's up, Droz? What's up, Moles? 1158 00:52:06,424 --> 00:52:07,392 You screwed up big-time. 1159 00:52:07,492 --> 00:52:08,659 The store was closed. 1160 00:52:08,759 --> 00:52:10,328 I put my trust in you to handle the beer, 1161 00:52:10,428 --> 00:52:11,496 and you violated that trust. 1162 00:52:11,596 --> 00:52:12,530 Yo, Gutter, Gutter, where it at? 1163 00:52:12,630 --> 00:52:13,598 Where it at? 1164 00:52:13,698 --> 00:52:14,699 Oh, right in there, sorry. 1165 00:52:14,799 --> 00:52:15,666 What's happenin', what's happenin'? 1166 00:52:15,766 --> 00:52:16,901 Mudbone, get in there. 1167 00:52:17,001 --> 00:52:18,035 Listen, don't charge these guys, Moles. 1168 00:52:18,203 --> 00:52:19,204 They just gotta use the can. 1169 00:52:19,304 --> 00:52:20,471 They're with me. 1170 00:52:20,571 --> 00:52:21,639 Droz, that was-- 1171 00:52:21,739 --> 00:52:22,773 Do you have any idea who that was? 1172 00:52:22,873 --> 00:52:24,242 Look, they're just using the can. 1173 00:52:24,342 --> 00:52:25,476 You made your point. 1174 00:52:25,576 --> 00:52:26,511 That was George Clinton. 1175 00:52:26,611 --> 00:52:27,678 I'm sorry. 1176 00:52:27,778 --> 00:52:29,247 Listen to me-- Parliament, P-Funk, 1177 00:52:29,347 --> 00:52:30,381 the P-Funk All-Stars. 1178 00:52:30,481 --> 00:52:31,582 I mean, come on, tell him. 1179 00:52:31,682 --> 00:52:33,484 Dr. Funkenstein? The man is the king 1180 00:52:33,584 --> 00:52:34,752 of interplanetary funkmanship. 1181 00:52:34,852 --> 00:52:36,521 Tell him, tell him who it is. 1182 00:52:36,621 --> 00:52:37,855 It's George Clinton. 1183 00:52:37,955 --> 00:52:39,224 The guy with the hair? 1184 00:52:39,290 --> 00:52:40,258 Yeah. 1185 00:52:40,358 --> 00:52:41,792 Gut, you're a legend. 1186 00:52:41,892 --> 00:52:44,529 Yo. There are no chicks in here. 1187 00:52:44,629 --> 00:52:45,730 What did I tell you? 1188 00:52:45,830 --> 00:52:48,399 Yeah, man, there's not even any chips. 1189 00:52:48,499 --> 00:52:49,867 Chips. Chips. 1190 00:52:49,967 --> 00:52:52,337 CHANTING: Chips! Chips! Chips! 1191 00:52:52,437 --> 00:52:53,438 Chips! Chips! Chips! 1192 00:52:53,538 --> 00:52:55,306 I'll hold it. 1193 00:52:56,941 --> 00:52:57,908 Man. 1194 00:52:58,008 --> 00:53:00,311 Y'all got to clean that place up. 1195 00:53:00,411 --> 00:53:01,512 DROZ: Gutter, get a mop! 1196 00:53:01,612 --> 00:53:02,747 It stink. 1197 00:53:02,847 --> 00:53:04,382 Listen, we couldn't help but notice 1198 00:53:04,482 --> 00:53:05,450 that you're George Clinton. 1199 00:53:05,550 --> 00:53:06,717 Yeah? 1200 00:53:06,817 --> 00:53:08,453 Listen, George, we've had a real bad day. 1201 00:53:08,553 --> 00:53:09,854 The president of the university 1202 00:53:09,954 --> 00:53:12,089 has been spanking us with a 7-grand damage bill. 1203 00:53:12,257 --> 00:53:13,258 We were gonna rob a 7-Eleven, 1204 00:53:13,358 --> 00:53:15,293 we don't have enough ski masks, right? 1205 00:53:15,393 --> 00:53:16,527 So, what are we gonna do? 1206 00:53:16,627 --> 00:53:17,928 We're gonna throw an all-campus rocker. 1207 00:53:18,028 --> 00:53:20,498 The only problem is, we don't have the artillery. 1208 00:53:20,598 --> 00:53:22,367 Nigga, please, what you want from me? 1209 00:53:22,467 --> 00:53:23,734 What are you trying to say? 1210 00:53:23,834 --> 00:53:25,370 We were hoping you could play our party. 1211 00:53:25,470 --> 00:53:26,604 What? 1212 00:53:26,704 --> 00:53:28,373 Well, can't nobody make no face that ugly 1213 00:53:28,473 --> 00:53:29,840 and not be serious. 1214 00:53:29,940 --> 00:53:31,709 We'll do it, man. Jesus. 1215 00:53:31,809 --> 00:53:33,278 You'll do it? 1216 00:53:33,344 --> 00:53:34,512 Hey, Gut, why don't you get the band off the van? 1217 00:53:34,612 --> 00:53:35,980 But the whole band ain't here. 1218 00:53:36,080 --> 00:53:37,282 Just tell everybody that's on the van to come on out. 1219 00:53:37,348 --> 00:53:38,283 All right. 1220 00:53:38,383 --> 00:53:39,550 That's so great. I'm gonna be right back. 1221 00:53:39,650 --> 00:53:41,118 Yeah, man, I gotcha. I gotcha. 1222 00:53:41,286 --> 00:53:42,553 Boy, y'all going overboard with this black awareness. 1223 00:53:42,653 --> 00:53:43,754 That boy got a rap. 1224 00:53:43,854 --> 00:53:44,922 It's equal opportunity. 1225 00:53:45,022 --> 00:53:47,525 Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! Chips! 1226 00:53:47,625 --> 00:53:48,926 Fellas! 1227 00:53:49,894 --> 00:53:52,196 Chuck, porterhouse, ribeye, 1228 00:53:52,297 --> 00:53:53,998 I know exactly how you guys are feeling. 1229 00:53:54,098 --> 00:53:55,633 In fact, I can think of only one thing 1230 00:53:55,733 --> 00:53:59,069 that could lift my spirits right now... 1231 00:53:59,337 --> 00:54:00,338 beer. 1232 00:54:00,438 --> 00:54:01,572 Beer. 1233 00:54:01,672 --> 00:54:03,308 CHANTING: Beer. Beer. 1234 00:54:03,341 --> 00:54:05,876 Beer. Beer. Beer! Beer! Beer! 1235 00:54:05,976 --> 00:54:07,878 I think I'm missing a piece. 1236 00:54:07,978 --> 00:54:10,014 Yeah, me, too, man. Let's give up, huh? 1237 00:54:10,114 --> 00:54:12,950 Guys, guys, we've got an L.A.-size riot 1238 00:54:13,050 --> 00:54:16,454 of thirsty men with no necks screaming for brew. 1239 00:54:17,888 --> 00:54:20,325 Yeah! Yeah! 1240 00:54:21,926 --> 00:54:24,161 * Makes the sparks ignite * 1241 00:54:24,329 --> 00:54:25,930 * And the thought of loving you * 1242 00:54:26,030 --> 00:54:28,165 * Is gettin' so exciting * 1243 00:54:28,333 --> 00:54:30,435 * Sky rockets in flight * 1244 00:54:30,535 --> 00:54:32,670 (Tuning up) 1245 00:54:32,770 --> 00:54:34,739 Yeah, that's close enough for funk, baby. 1246 00:54:34,839 --> 00:54:37,141 Thanks, but I know how to tune my axe. 1247 00:54:37,342 --> 00:54:38,242 I'll bet you do. 1248 00:54:38,343 --> 00:54:40,110 Oh, my God. George Clinton. 1249 00:54:40,345 --> 00:54:41,346 Roof! 1250 00:54:41,446 --> 00:54:42,513 Hi. 1251 00:54:42,613 --> 00:54:44,449 Just the dog in me, baby. 1252 00:54:44,549 --> 00:54:46,684 Oh, shit! Hi. 1253 00:54:46,784 --> 00:54:47,852 Yeah. Why don't you play me a song there? 1254 00:54:47,952 --> 00:54:49,153 Go ahead, girl. 1255 00:54:49,420 --> 00:54:50,555 Uh... 1256 00:54:51,989 --> 00:54:54,359 Pig, you gotta change your PJs. 1257 00:54:54,459 --> 00:54:56,727 We're havin' a party. 1258 00:54:56,827 --> 00:54:59,129 Shower scene. 1259 00:54:59,397 --> 00:55:00,531 Oh. 1260 00:55:02,467 --> 00:55:04,068 MOLES: Droz. 1261 00:55:04,369 --> 00:55:05,370 Droz! 1262 00:55:05,436 --> 00:55:06,371 Yeah. 1263 00:55:06,404 --> 00:55:07,605 I don't want to burst your bubble, 1264 00:55:07,705 --> 00:55:08,673 but we got a slight problem here. 1265 00:55:08,773 --> 00:55:10,375 What? 1266 00:55:10,441 --> 00:55:11,876 No guests. 1267 00:55:11,976 --> 00:55:14,011 (Cecelia and George talking) 1268 00:55:14,111 --> 00:55:15,179 Hi. How are you doin'? 1269 00:55:15,413 --> 00:55:17,515 Hey, what up? 1270 00:55:29,860 --> 00:55:30,828 (Yelling) 1271 00:55:30,928 --> 00:55:32,463 Yeah. That's right, man. 1272 00:55:32,563 --> 00:55:34,399 I hear what you're sayin'. 1273 00:55:34,465 --> 00:55:36,401 OK. OK--hey! 1274 00:55:36,501 --> 00:55:37,502 Hold on a sec, everybody. 1275 00:55:37,602 --> 00:55:39,236 Now, I understand y'all met Tom. 1276 00:55:39,404 --> 00:55:41,572 WOMAN: Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! I fucking met Tom! 1277 00:55:41,672 --> 00:55:43,107 He snagged our disk! 1278 00:55:43,207 --> 00:55:45,075 I know he did, and he's gonna pay for it, believe me. 1279 00:55:45,175 --> 00:55:47,077 Moles, you take him downstairs, 1280 00:55:47,177 --> 00:55:48,513 and you beat the shit out of him. 1281 00:55:48,613 --> 00:55:49,880 Yeah! Yeah! 1282 00:55:49,980 --> 00:55:51,716 Sorry, kid. You heard the man. 1283 00:55:51,816 --> 00:55:52,883 No! No! Please, no! 1284 00:55:52,983 --> 00:55:54,952 OK. Justice has been served, everybody. 1285 00:55:55,052 --> 00:55:56,554 You can go home. 1286 00:55:56,654 --> 00:55:57,888 (Grumbling) 1287 00:55:57,988 --> 00:55:59,256 Oh, wait a minute. What am I saying? 1288 00:55:59,424 --> 00:56:00,991 If you guys aren't doing anything tonight, 1289 00:56:01,091 --> 00:56:02,292 we got George Clinton inside. 1290 00:56:02,427 --> 00:56:03,961 He's tuning up on the main stage. 1291 00:56:04,061 --> 00:56:06,531 Sounds like another one of the white man's lies to me. 1292 00:56:06,631 --> 00:56:07,598 Yeah! Yeah! 1293 00:56:07,698 --> 00:56:10,868 (Funk music playing) 1294 00:56:10,968 --> 00:56:12,470 Or maybe not. 1295 00:56:12,570 --> 00:56:13,704 Let's check it out. 1296 00:56:13,804 --> 00:56:15,205 Hey, wait a minute! 1297 00:56:15,440 --> 00:56:16,474 What about us? 1298 00:56:16,574 --> 00:56:18,042 Yeah, that little dork tripped over the main plug 1299 00:56:18,142 --> 00:56:19,844 and lost all our theses! 1300 00:56:19,944 --> 00:56:21,979 OK, that's no problem. You guys come with me. 1301 00:56:22,079 --> 00:56:23,448 All right? The rest of you-- 1302 00:56:23,514 --> 00:56:26,451 5 bucks a head, and the line forms to the left. 1303 00:56:28,519 --> 00:56:29,754 OK. What's your major? 1304 00:56:29,854 --> 00:56:30,888 Um, particle physics? 1305 00:56:30,988 --> 00:56:33,323 That's a tough one. 1306 00:56:33,458 --> 00:56:36,594 Ooh...motion of helium atoms in an excited stage. 1307 00:56:36,694 --> 00:56:39,029 Watch out, it's a scorcher. 1308 00:56:39,129 --> 00:56:40,030 Next. 1309 00:56:40,130 --> 00:56:41,832 Uh...Sanskrit. 1310 00:56:41,932 --> 00:56:43,367 Sanskrit. 1311 00:56:43,468 --> 00:56:45,703 You're majoring in a 5,000-year-old dead language? 1312 00:56:45,803 --> 00:56:47,472 Yeah. 1313 00:56:48,506 --> 00:56:49,273 OK. 1314 00:56:49,540 --> 00:56:50,741 Ooh. 1315 00:56:50,841 --> 00:56:52,276 Latin--it's the best I can do. 1316 00:56:52,543 --> 00:56:53,478 Next. 1317 00:56:53,578 --> 00:56:54,945 Phys. Ed. 1318 00:56:55,045 --> 00:56:56,781 Phys. Ed. OK, you're out of my room. 1319 00:56:56,881 --> 00:56:57,915 Seriously. Get out. 1320 00:56:58,015 --> 00:57:00,685 Hello, Port Chester University. 1321 00:57:00,785 --> 00:57:03,053 (Cheering) 1322 00:57:06,491 --> 00:57:08,526 This is... 1323 00:57:08,626 --> 00:57:10,528 George...Clinton. 1324 00:57:10,628 --> 00:57:12,930 George Cl-Clinton... 1325 00:57:13,030 --> 00:57:14,699 Parliament Funkadelic. 1326 00:57:14,799 --> 00:57:16,534 And the Parliament Funkadelic. 1327 00:57:16,634 --> 00:57:18,202 (Cheers and applause) 1328 00:57:22,807 --> 00:57:24,174 * Tear the roof off the mother * 1329 00:57:24,274 --> 00:57:25,710 * Tear the roof off the mother-sucker * 1330 00:57:25,810 --> 00:57:27,678 * Tear the roof off the sucker * 1331 00:57:27,778 --> 00:57:29,346 * Yeah 1332 00:57:29,580 --> 00:57:31,649 * Yeah, yeah * 1333 00:57:31,749 --> 00:57:33,618 * Mm-mm 1334 00:57:35,953 --> 00:57:38,355 * You got a real type of thing * 1335 00:57:38,523 --> 00:57:40,525 * Goin' down, gettin' down * 1336 00:57:40,591 --> 00:57:44,529 * There's a whole lotta rhythm goin' 'round * 1337 00:57:44,562 --> 00:57:47,364 * You got a real type of thing * 1338 00:57:47,532 --> 00:57:49,366 * Goin' down, gettin' down * 1339 00:57:49,534 --> 00:57:53,638 * There's a whole lotta rhythm goin' 'round * 1340 00:57:53,738 --> 00:57:56,607 * We want to funk... 1341 00:57:57,708 --> 00:57:58,909 All right, sisters. 1342 00:57:59,009 --> 00:58:01,579 We've had a mild setback, but we've regrouped. 1343 00:58:01,679 --> 00:58:03,047 Let's mobilise. 1344 00:58:03,147 --> 00:58:05,750 Isn't this George Clinton? 1345 00:58:06,851 --> 00:58:08,185 No, couldn't be. 1346 00:58:08,285 --> 00:58:09,754 It's got to be a cover band, 1347 00:58:09,854 --> 00:58:10,921 he'd never play the pit. 1348 00:58:11,021 --> 00:58:13,691 Does sound like him...though. 1349 00:58:13,791 --> 00:58:14,725 Guys... 1350 00:58:14,825 --> 00:58:16,794 maybe we should bag the protest. 1351 00:58:16,894 --> 00:58:18,362 What? No! No! 1352 00:58:18,596 --> 00:58:19,664 B-b-but, Sam! 1353 00:58:19,764 --> 00:58:21,131 Their party flier promotes 1354 00:58:21,231 --> 00:58:22,600 the objectification of women. 1355 00:58:22,700 --> 00:58:24,569 Maybe... 1356 00:58:24,635 --> 00:58:27,437 but they've also got a really kickin' party goin' on. 1357 00:58:27,638 --> 00:58:30,575 That's great, Sam. 1358 00:58:30,675 --> 00:58:32,076 Why don't we just 1359 00:58:32,176 --> 00:58:33,844 forget about fighting the phallacracy 1360 00:58:33,944 --> 00:58:34,945 for a few hours 1361 00:58:35,045 --> 00:58:36,847 and go have a good time, right? 1362 00:58:36,947 --> 00:58:39,917 Exactly. 1363 00:58:40,017 --> 00:58:41,952 Excuse me. 1364 00:58:42,052 --> 00:58:43,053 Come back! You can't go! 1365 00:58:43,153 --> 00:58:45,623 I can't believe her! 1366 00:58:48,993 --> 00:58:51,662 * ...Working up my appetite 1367 00:58:51,762 --> 00:58:53,130 We're locked in! 1368 00:58:53,230 --> 00:58:55,833 * Lookin' forward to a little afternoon delight * 1369 00:58:55,933 --> 00:58:57,301 I'm a black man. 1370 00:58:57,401 --> 00:58:58,803 There's no justice for me here in America. 1371 00:58:58,903 --> 00:59:00,738 I should be at the front of the line. 1372 00:59:00,838 --> 00:59:02,006 Yeah, well, I'm gay 1373 00:59:02,106 --> 00:59:03,608 and subject to ridicule and discrimination 1374 00:59:03,674 --> 00:59:04,609 wherever I go. 1375 00:59:04,709 --> 00:59:05,943 Women are oppressed throughout the world. 1376 00:59:06,043 --> 00:59:07,177 Give it a rest. 1377 00:59:07,277 --> 00:59:08,646 Thank you. Thank you. 1378 00:59:08,746 --> 00:59:11,215 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you very much. 1379 00:59:11,315 --> 00:59:13,183 Hey, Moles. How are we doin'? 1380 00:59:13,283 --> 00:59:14,619 Got about a thou here, 1381 00:59:14,685 --> 00:59:16,754 plus I got Cecelia on the other door. 1382 00:59:16,854 --> 00:59:18,122 What other door? 1383 00:59:18,222 --> 00:59:19,757 Hold it! One or two? 1384 00:59:19,857 --> 00:59:20,791 What? 1385 00:59:20,891 --> 00:59:23,127 One or two? 1386 00:59:23,227 --> 00:59:24,128 Two. 1387 00:59:24,228 --> 00:59:25,630 4 bucks. 1388 00:59:26,631 --> 00:59:28,065 4 bucks. 1389 00:59:30,835 --> 00:59:32,102 Light a match. 1390 00:59:32,202 --> 00:59:33,938 God, Gutter, take the can, will you? 1391 00:59:34,038 --> 00:59:36,206 Take the can. 2 to stand, 4 to sit. 1392 00:59:36,306 --> 00:59:37,274 Hey-hey! 1393 00:59:37,374 --> 00:59:39,043 Not so fast, superguy. 1394 00:59:39,143 --> 00:59:41,779 * Every time I comb my hair * 1395 00:59:42,713 --> 00:59:46,550 * Thoughts of you get in my eyes * 1396 00:59:46,651 --> 00:59:48,953 * You're always sayin' that I don't care * 1397 00:59:49,053 --> 00:59:50,487 Have a good party. 1398 00:59:50,721 --> 00:59:51,656 Whoo-hoo! 1399 00:59:51,722 --> 00:59:53,057 Good party. 1400 00:59:53,157 --> 00:59:55,092 Have a good party! 1401 00:59:55,192 --> 00:59:57,762 Look at this unbridled display of testosterone. 1402 00:59:57,862 --> 00:59:59,129 Makes me sick. 1403 00:59:59,229 --> 01:00:01,031 Do it, man! Go on! 1404 01:00:01,131 --> 01:00:02,166 Hey! 1405 01:00:02,266 --> 01:00:03,668 What's up, babes? 1406 01:00:03,668 --> 01:00:06,103 Pack up your rape culture and take a hike! 1407 01:00:06,203 --> 01:00:07,672 Ha ha ha! 1408 01:00:07,772 --> 01:00:08,973 You want a brewdog? 1409 01:00:09,073 --> 01:00:11,776 We're not interested in your penis! 1410 01:00:11,876 --> 01:00:12,843 Wait. Wait. 1411 01:00:12,943 --> 01:00:14,679 I think he's offering us a beer. 1412 01:00:14,779 --> 01:00:16,046 Um, yes... 1413 01:00:16,146 --> 01:00:17,481 we would like... 1414 01:00:17,715 --> 01:00:18,749 a beer. 1415 01:00:18,849 --> 01:00:19,784 OK. 1416 01:00:19,884 --> 01:00:21,986 Gimme a beer! Gimme a beer! 1417 01:00:22,086 --> 01:00:23,453 Yes! Yes! Yes! 1418 01:00:23,688 --> 01:00:25,422 It's like... 1419 01:00:25,522 --> 01:00:28,492 if you're nice to them, they bring you things? 1420 01:00:28,726 --> 01:00:30,094 Exactly. 1421 01:00:30,194 --> 01:00:33,530 * How I wish you'd understand * 1422 01:00:33,630 --> 01:00:36,433 Raji, Deege, get up. Come on. We got company. 1423 01:00:36,667 --> 01:00:38,168 Hey, Droz. 1424 01:00:38,268 --> 01:00:42,372 * How I wish you were my date * 1425 01:00:53,083 --> 01:00:54,151 Hey! 1426 01:00:54,251 --> 01:00:55,753 You know what, Droz? 1427 01:00:55,853 --> 01:00:56,787 What's up, baby? 1428 01:00:56,887 --> 01:00:58,122 I'm 18! 1429 01:00:58,222 --> 01:00:59,924 Yeah! I'm up at a college for the weekend! 1430 01:01:00,024 --> 01:01:00,991 Yeah? 1431 01:01:01,091 --> 01:01:02,192 I'm gettin' wasted 1432 01:01:02,292 --> 01:01:03,728 at one of the greatest rages of all time! 1433 01:01:03,761 --> 01:01:05,095 My parents--they're nowhere in sight. 1434 01:01:05,195 --> 01:01:06,396 Nowhere. 1435 01:01:06,496 --> 01:01:07,998 There--there are women are all around me. 1436 01:01:08,098 --> 01:01:09,133 Right. 1437 01:01:09,233 --> 01:01:11,168 Why the hell am I talkin' to you? 1438 01:01:11,268 --> 01:01:12,803 Ha! No idea, baby. 1439 01:01:12,903 --> 01:01:14,171 I don't know! 1440 01:01:14,271 --> 01:01:15,940 Do it big time! 1441 01:01:22,847 --> 01:01:24,448 Whoa! 1442 01:01:26,350 --> 01:01:27,852 Hey! You made it! 1443 01:01:27,952 --> 01:01:28,919 Yeah! 1444 01:01:29,019 --> 01:01:30,354 Decent party. 1445 01:01:30,454 --> 01:01:32,189 I can't believe the naked guy showed. 1446 01:01:32,289 --> 01:01:33,824 Naked guy! 1447 01:01:34,959 --> 01:01:37,227 Excellent butt! 1448 01:01:37,327 --> 01:01:38,562 Now it's a party! 1449 01:01:38,796 --> 01:01:39,797 Gangway! 1450 01:01:39,897 --> 01:01:41,031 Hey! 1451 01:01:44,969 --> 01:01:47,571 Gutter! Hey, Gut man! 1452 01:01:47,805 --> 01:01:48,873 Hey! Gutter! 1453 01:01:48,973 --> 01:01:50,174 What's up, Mersh? 1454 01:01:50,274 --> 01:01:52,176 Total nightmare scenario, man. 1455 01:01:52,276 --> 01:01:54,078 We spotted you, like, 20 minutes 1456 01:01:54,178 --> 01:01:55,245 in the ride lot. 1457 01:01:55,345 --> 01:01:56,981 No show, right? 1458 01:01:57,081 --> 01:01:59,049 Discouraged at Civic and nix! 1459 01:01:59,149 --> 01:02:00,250 Clinton bails! 1460 01:02:00,350 --> 01:02:03,387 Mersh, you gotta lay off the pipe, man! 1461 01:02:03,487 --> 01:02:06,356 Clinton is playing right here! 1462 01:02:06,456 --> 01:02:09,927 * Erotic city come alive... * 1463 01:02:11,829 --> 01:02:13,964 Marvellous! 1464 01:02:14,064 --> 01:02:14,965 Whoo! 1465 01:02:15,065 --> 01:02:18,168 * Sky rockets in flight * 1466 01:02:18,268 --> 01:02:20,905 * Afternoon delight... 1467 01:02:21,005 --> 01:02:23,173 (Moaning) 1468 01:02:23,273 --> 01:02:24,341 Aah! 1469 01:02:24,441 --> 01:02:26,276 Aah! 1470 01:02:27,177 --> 01:02:28,445 * It's throbbin' 1471 01:02:28,545 --> 01:02:29,814 * Whee-whee-whoo-whee 1472 01:02:29,880 --> 01:02:31,015 * Whoo-whoo whoo-whoo whoo-whoo * 1473 01:02:31,115 --> 01:02:32,817 * It's throbbin' 1474 01:02:32,917 --> 01:02:34,518 * Hey hey hey-hey 1475 01:02:34,618 --> 01:02:36,686 * Friction keeps me throbbing * 1476 01:02:36,821 --> 01:02:39,323 * Every time we do the stomp * 1477 01:02:39,423 --> 01:02:40,690 * And I'll be starving 1478 01:02:40,825 --> 01:02:43,127 * For the next time that we bump * 1479 01:02:43,227 --> 01:02:44,428 Tom! 1480 01:02:44,528 --> 01:02:46,831 Tom! 1481 01:02:48,232 --> 01:02:50,334 * Work up a sweat and wipe it off * 1482 01:02:50,434 --> 01:02:52,837 * And stomp some more... 1483 01:02:54,071 --> 01:02:55,072 Hi! 1484 01:02:55,172 --> 01:02:57,074 Hey! Whoa! Hey! What's goin' on? 1485 01:02:57,174 --> 01:02:58,275 What? 1486 01:02:58,375 --> 01:03:01,311 Uh, hey, do you want to go someplace? 1487 01:03:09,286 --> 01:03:10,587 (Grunt) 1488 01:03:10,855 --> 01:03:11,621 Ow! 1489 01:03:11,856 --> 01:03:13,223 Don't! 1490 01:03:13,323 --> 01:03:14,291 Heh. 1491 01:03:14,391 --> 01:03:16,160 Move it, you little pervert. 1492 01:03:16,260 --> 01:03:19,629 Eh...eh...ah! 1493 01:03:19,864 --> 01:03:20,998 Ooh...agh! 1494 01:03:21,098 --> 01:03:22,032 Ow! 1495 01:03:22,132 --> 01:03:23,433 Ooh! 1496 01:03:27,637 --> 01:03:30,240 Round up your cohorts, McPherson. 1497 01:03:30,340 --> 01:03:33,343 You're getting your house back. 1498 01:03:36,080 --> 01:03:37,081 Yes! 1499 01:03:37,181 --> 01:03:38,949 * Stomp stomp stomp stomp 1500 01:03:39,049 --> 01:03:40,750 * Oooh! 1501 01:03:40,885 --> 01:03:43,387 * Who's that stompin' up there? * 1502 01:03:43,487 --> 01:03:47,291 I have some big news. 1503 01:03:47,391 --> 01:03:50,260 7,000...500... 1504 01:03:50,360 --> 01:03:51,495 68 dollars! 1505 01:03:51,595 --> 01:03:54,098 The damage money and 100 to spare! 1506 01:03:54,198 --> 01:03:55,232 Yeah! Yeah! 1507 01:03:55,332 --> 01:03:57,267 Who wants to break some more shit? 1508 01:03:57,367 --> 01:03:58,903 I do! 1509 01:04:15,986 --> 01:04:18,555 "A Bridge Too Far." 1510 01:04:19,924 --> 01:04:22,126 Caine and Hackman in the same movie together! 1511 01:04:22,226 --> 01:04:25,495 This is my thesis, man! This is my closing argument! 1512 01:04:25,595 --> 01:04:30,300 I can stop watchin' TV! 1513 01:04:30,400 --> 01:04:32,636 Yeah! 1514 01:04:35,205 --> 01:04:39,043 * Stomp stomp stomp stomp, yeah * 1515 01:04:39,143 --> 01:04:40,978 Yeah! 1516 01:04:41,078 --> 01:04:42,646 * Go stomp 1517 01:04:44,148 --> 01:04:45,950 (Pigman yelling) 1518 01:04:46,050 --> 01:04:47,417 * Stomp 1519 01:04:49,086 --> 01:04:50,554 * Go stomp 1520 01:04:53,157 --> 01:04:55,625 * I said we're jumpin' and a-rockin' and a-stompin' * 1521 01:04:55,725 --> 01:04:56,793 * Till the break of dawn 1522 01:04:56,961 --> 01:04:58,262 * Jump up and shout 1523 01:04:58,362 --> 01:05:00,064 * 'Cause you got funk in your feet * 1524 01:05:00,164 --> 01:05:01,331 * Go stomp 1525 01:05:01,431 --> 01:05:02,632 * Don't you let down on me * 1526 01:05:02,732 --> 01:05:04,301 * Get stompin' with your shoes * 1527 01:05:04,401 --> 01:05:05,569 * Stomp 1528 01:05:05,669 --> 01:05:06,971 * Ooh, when I start stompin' * 1529 01:05:07,071 --> 01:05:08,405 * Girl, I believe I'm good at this * 1530 01:05:08,505 --> 01:05:09,839 * Go stomp 1531 01:05:09,974 --> 01:05:11,175 * All around the dance floor 1532 01:05:11,275 --> 01:05:12,977 * Stompin' at its best 1533 01:05:13,043 --> 01:05:15,845 * Stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp * 1534 01:05:15,980 --> 01:05:19,016 * Till you can't stop, till you can't stop, ooh * 1535 01:05:19,116 --> 01:05:20,417 * Go stomp 1536 01:05:20,517 --> 01:05:23,287 * Till you can't stop, till you can't stop * 1537 01:05:23,387 --> 01:05:24,989 * Stomp 1538 01:05:25,055 --> 01:05:26,723 * Till you can't stop, till you can't stop, ooh * 1539 01:05:26,991 --> 01:05:27,757 (Roar) 1540 01:05:27,992 --> 01:05:29,593 * Go stomp * 1541 01:05:29,693 --> 01:05:31,996 * Stomp till you can't stop, till you can't stop, ooh * 1542 01:05:32,029 --> 01:05:35,499 * Stomp stomp stomp stomp stomp * 1543 01:05:35,599 --> 01:05:38,535 Stop it right now! 1544 01:05:43,807 --> 01:05:47,011 Moonbeam, what are you doing here? 1545 01:05:48,178 --> 01:05:49,379 All right, everyone. 1546 01:05:49,479 --> 01:05:51,081 You've let these warped nihilists 1547 01:05:51,181 --> 01:05:53,383 corrupt you long enough. 1548 01:05:53,483 --> 01:05:54,618 Back to your dorms. 1549 01:05:54,718 --> 01:05:55,919 Funk you very much, too. 1550 01:05:56,020 --> 01:05:57,554 Let's get the hell out of here, y'all. 1551 01:05:57,654 --> 01:06:02,026 We don't need this. Stomp no more. 1552 01:06:03,527 --> 01:06:06,463 Boo! Party-pooper. 1553 01:06:06,563 --> 01:06:08,232 Thanks for tanking the party. 1554 01:06:08,332 --> 01:06:09,766 That was real nice. 1555 01:06:10,034 --> 01:06:12,369 But I got some bad news. 1556 01:06:12,469 --> 01:06:14,371 We actually raised enough money, 1557 01:06:14,471 --> 01:06:17,741 so we're keeping the house. 1558 01:06:18,708 --> 01:06:21,178 Recognise these, Mr. Andrews? 1559 01:06:21,278 --> 01:06:22,546 They're complaint forms. 1560 01:06:22,646 --> 01:06:24,581 And between today's activities 1561 01:06:24,681 --> 01:06:26,516 and tonight's little exercise in offensiveness, 1562 01:06:26,616 --> 01:06:28,252 I can assure you 1563 01:06:28,352 --> 01:06:31,621 there are more than enough to kick you all off campus. 1564 01:06:31,721 --> 01:06:34,558 All right, boys. Let's close it down. 1565 01:06:34,658 --> 01:06:38,195 I warned you your attitude was disrupting this campus. 1566 01:06:38,295 --> 01:06:40,230 The students have spoken. 1567 01:06:40,330 --> 01:06:42,599 You're out of here. 1568 01:06:48,605 --> 01:06:51,208 Bye. Thanks for the party... 1569 01:06:51,308 --> 01:06:52,776 oppressors. 1570 01:06:54,644 --> 01:06:56,080 I've got one question. 1571 01:06:56,146 --> 01:06:58,548 If we're movin' out, who's movin' in? 1572 01:06:59,483 --> 01:07:01,285 Hi, everybody. 1573 01:07:01,385 --> 01:07:04,121 Hey, what's wrong? 1574 01:07:04,221 --> 01:07:06,390 Aw, looks like you guys went all out tonight, 1575 01:07:06,490 --> 01:07:09,626 raised $7,000. Wow! 1576 01:07:10,827 --> 01:07:12,162 What's the matter, forehead, 1577 01:07:12,262 --> 01:07:14,198 trying to figure it out? 1578 01:07:14,298 --> 01:07:15,632 Well, let's see. 1579 01:07:15,732 --> 01:07:17,434 We give you the damage bill, 1580 01:07:17,534 --> 01:07:19,536 you, of course, predictably throw 1581 01:07:19,636 --> 01:07:21,738 a disgusting party, all the freaky freakies 1582 01:07:21,838 --> 01:07:23,640 come out of the woodwork to protest, 1583 01:07:23,740 --> 01:07:25,775 and you're out of here. 1584 01:07:25,875 --> 01:07:27,744 Well, we still trashed your beemer, 1585 01:07:27,844 --> 01:07:30,347 you screaming preppy asshole. 1586 01:07:30,447 --> 01:07:32,182 Right! 1587 01:07:32,282 --> 01:07:34,118 That's not my car. 1588 01:07:34,218 --> 01:07:35,552 (Alarm beeps) 1589 01:07:35,652 --> 01:07:38,288 Warning. You are too close to the vehicle. 1590 01:07:38,388 --> 01:07:40,490 Huh... 1591 01:07:40,590 --> 01:07:42,759 Now get off my lawn. 1592 01:07:43,827 --> 01:07:45,295 Move! 1593 01:07:45,395 --> 01:07:46,463 Wait a second. 1594 01:07:46,563 --> 01:07:48,632 You guys can't let them just walk in 1595 01:07:48,732 --> 01:07:50,500 and take the pit. 1596 01:07:50,600 --> 01:07:51,601 We could go Waco on 'em, man. 1597 01:07:51,701 --> 01:07:52,702 We could blow up our own house. 1598 01:07:52,802 --> 01:07:55,539 Nah, ran out of explosives. 1599 01:07:55,639 --> 01:07:56,806 What we need is a plan. 1600 01:07:56,906 --> 01:07:59,843 OK. Garcia-Thompson's the president. 1601 01:07:59,943 --> 01:08:01,145 She's the one that's kicking you out, right? 1602 01:08:01,211 --> 01:08:02,146 Yeah. 1603 01:08:02,246 --> 01:08:04,414 What if she wasn't the president anymore? 1604 01:08:04,514 --> 01:08:05,982 That sounds nice in theory and all, 1605 01:08:06,150 --> 01:08:07,684 but how the hell are we supposed to pull that one off? 1606 01:08:07,784 --> 01:08:09,619 I overheard some old guys talking. 1607 01:08:09,719 --> 01:08:10,654 They want to get rid of Thompson, 1608 01:08:10,754 --> 01:08:12,422 but legally they can't, 1609 01:08:12,522 --> 01:08:14,658 not unless she screws something up 1610 01:08:14,758 --> 01:08:17,661 really, really big. 1611 01:08:19,263 --> 01:08:21,598 (Marching band plays) 1612 01:08:38,648 --> 01:08:39,949 Whoo. 1613 01:08:40,217 --> 01:08:41,185 Whoo. 1614 01:08:41,218 --> 01:08:42,286 I'd like to welcome everyone 1615 01:08:42,386 --> 01:08:47,257 to Port Chester's 200th Anniversary Celebration. 1616 01:08:49,259 --> 01:08:51,261 Before we get started, please observe 1617 01:08:51,361 --> 01:08:53,630 that your program notes have been printed 1618 01:08:53,730 --> 01:08:56,733 on recycled paper. 1619 01:08:59,203 --> 01:09:03,207 Birthdays are a way of remembering one's history... 1620 01:09:03,273 --> 01:09:04,208 Perfect. 1621 01:09:04,274 --> 01:09:05,409 Those homeless people at the pit 1622 01:09:05,509 --> 01:09:07,110 didn't even bother to show. 1623 01:09:07,211 --> 01:09:08,445 They're probably grubbin' quarters 1624 01:09:08,545 --> 01:09:10,514 at the bus station by now. 1625 01:09:10,614 --> 01:09:12,949 Welcome PCU's most recent change, 1626 01:09:13,217 --> 01:09:15,084 our new school mascot, 1627 01:09:15,219 --> 01:09:18,422 the Port Chester Whooping Crane. 1628 01:09:18,522 --> 01:09:20,824 (Applause) 1629 01:09:22,226 --> 01:09:25,595 Hey, guys, it's a beautiful day, isn't it? 1630 01:09:25,695 --> 01:09:27,364 Oh, God. Not now! 1631 01:09:27,464 --> 01:09:28,465 Hey, what's up? 1632 01:09:28,565 --> 01:09:29,833 (Grunting) 1633 01:09:29,933 --> 01:09:31,335 Threatened by hunters and developers 1634 01:09:31,435 --> 01:09:35,539 and those awful plastic six-pack can holder things. 1635 01:09:35,639 --> 01:09:37,507 But here at Port Chester, 1636 01:09:37,607 --> 01:09:39,243 she will be closely watched and tended to, 1637 01:09:39,309 --> 01:09:42,712 safe and enclosed from a natural habitat 1638 01:09:42,812 --> 01:09:44,080 that is so fraught with danger. 1639 01:09:44,314 --> 01:09:45,249 Oh, my God. 1640 01:09:45,315 --> 01:09:48,452 STUDENT: I hear they taste like chicken. 1641 01:09:52,622 --> 01:09:54,258 What's he doing? 1642 01:09:54,324 --> 01:09:56,260 Let's all give it up for Andrea Garcia-Thompson 1643 01:09:56,360 --> 01:10:00,597 and her amazing and impromptu rare bird show. 1644 01:10:00,697 --> 01:10:02,732 The bird show. The amazing bird show. 1645 01:10:02,832 --> 01:10:05,702 The wonderful bird show. The bird show. 1646 01:10:07,003 --> 01:10:08,272 I don't have a lot of time to say this, 1647 01:10:08,372 --> 01:10:10,206 but I've got to get something off my chest. 1648 01:10:10,307 --> 01:10:12,842 Last night, my house threw a party, 1649 01:10:12,942 --> 01:10:16,613 and I thought that we all finally got along. 1650 01:10:16,713 --> 01:10:18,382 We had a good time. 1651 01:10:18,482 --> 01:10:21,184 But we got so many protests, we broke so many rules, 1652 01:10:21,285 --> 01:10:23,253 that we got booted off campus. 1653 01:10:23,353 --> 01:10:25,655 You know, it used to be the administration's job 1654 01:10:25,755 --> 01:10:26,756 to make rules. 1655 01:10:26,856 --> 01:10:28,392 It used to be us against them. 1656 01:10:28,492 --> 01:10:30,627 Now it's us against us. 1657 01:10:30,727 --> 01:10:33,229 I've been here for 7 years, and I got to tell you guys, 1658 01:10:33,330 --> 01:10:36,600 what's going on here is about America. 1659 01:10:36,700 --> 01:10:37,934 Shut up. 1660 01:10:38,034 --> 01:10:39,168 It's about democracy. 1661 01:10:39,269 --> 01:10:40,637 It's about the Bill of Rights 1662 01:10:40,737 --> 01:10:42,906 and basic cable, call-waiting, 1663 01:10:43,006 --> 01:10:44,474 and free trips to the salad bar. 1664 01:10:44,574 --> 01:10:47,311 It's about everything that makes this country great. 1665 01:10:47,411 --> 01:10:49,913 Our country! 1666 01:10:50,013 --> 01:10:52,749 We can do something about this. 1667 01:10:52,849 --> 01:10:55,985 We can finally say... 1668 01:10:56,085 --> 01:10:59,489 that when some people are having a good time, 1669 01:10:59,589 --> 01:11:01,691 and drinking some beers and throwing some meat, 1670 01:11:01,791 --> 01:11:05,161 that we're not going to protest. 1671 01:11:05,329 --> 01:11:08,164 In fact, I promised myself I wouldn't do this. 1672 01:11:08,398 --> 01:11:09,799 I'm sorry. 1673 01:11:09,899 --> 01:11:13,837 If we could just say that, if only to each other, 1674 01:11:13,937 --> 01:11:15,572 just this one time, 1675 01:11:15,672 --> 01:11:18,007 that we're not gonna protest... 1676 01:11:24,881 --> 01:11:26,516 That we're not gonna protest? 1677 01:11:26,616 --> 01:11:29,886 We're not gonna protest! 1678 01:11:31,054 --> 01:11:32,856 We're not gonna protest! 1679 01:11:32,956 --> 01:11:34,791 We're not gonna protest! 1680 01:11:34,891 --> 01:11:36,826 We're not gonna protest! 1681 01:11:36,926 --> 01:11:38,795 We're not gonna protest! 1682 01:11:38,895 --> 01:11:40,630 We're not gonna protest! 1683 01:11:40,730 --> 01:11:42,499 We're not gonna protest! 1684 01:11:42,599 --> 01:11:43,967 We're not gonna protest! 1685 01:11:44,067 --> 01:11:45,969 We're not gonna protest! 1686 01:11:46,069 --> 01:11:47,904 We're not gonna protest! 1687 01:11:48,004 --> 01:11:49,373 We're not gonna protest! 1688 01:11:49,473 --> 01:11:51,508 This is not good. 1689 01:11:51,608 --> 01:11:52,942 This is really not good. 1690 01:11:53,042 --> 01:11:55,512 We're not gonna protest! 1691 01:11:55,612 --> 01:11:57,246 We're not gonna protest! 1692 01:11:57,381 --> 01:11:59,483 Chant sheets! Get your chant sheets. 1693 01:11:59,583 --> 01:12:00,450 Right here. 1694 01:12:00,550 --> 01:12:03,653 We got placards here. Placards here. 1695 01:12:03,753 --> 01:12:05,455 OK. We got placards here. 1696 01:12:05,555 --> 01:12:07,857 Placards for everybody. 1697 01:12:08,792 --> 01:12:10,894 We brought our own. 1698 01:12:13,697 --> 01:12:16,466 We're not gonna protest! 1699 01:12:16,566 --> 01:12:19,068 Ladies and gentlemen, please take your seats. 1700 01:12:19,168 --> 01:12:21,705 Everyone, please, take your seats. 1701 01:12:21,805 --> 01:12:23,239 Be quiet! 1702 01:12:23,407 --> 01:12:25,809 I'm asking you to be quiet, everyone. 1703 01:12:25,909 --> 01:12:28,978 Be quiet! 1704 01:12:29,078 --> 01:12:32,549 B.D., get us out of here before they touch me. 1705 01:12:34,651 --> 01:12:35,619 Please take your seats. 1706 01:12:35,719 --> 01:12:36,986 Be quiet! 1707 01:12:37,086 --> 01:12:41,658 Thompson, your inability to control the students 1708 01:12:41,758 --> 01:12:43,026 has convinced us that you are 1709 01:12:43,126 --> 01:12:44,828 an ineffective president. 1710 01:12:44,928 --> 01:12:47,030 What? What are you talking about? 1711 01:12:47,130 --> 01:12:49,666 You're fired, Thompson! 1712 01:12:49,766 --> 01:12:52,536 Dismissed, booted, sacked, 1713 01:12:52,636 --> 01:12:53,803 history, shit-canned, 1714 01:12:53,903 --> 01:12:54,838 out of here. 1715 01:12:54,938 --> 01:12:56,606 What are you doing? 1716 01:12:56,706 --> 01:12:57,941 B.D., go beat up the pre-frosh. 1717 01:12:58,041 --> 01:12:59,443 The little kid? 1718 01:12:59,543 --> 01:13:03,513 He's a pit spy, you Neanderthal. Go kick his ass. 1719 01:13:05,615 --> 01:13:06,950 Thanks, guys. 1720 01:13:07,050 --> 01:13:08,585 I feel much better now. 1721 01:13:08,685 --> 01:13:11,888 Oh, OK. Thank you. 1722 01:13:11,988 --> 01:13:12,989 We're not gonna protest! 1723 01:13:13,089 --> 01:13:15,559 Gutter is a tool! 1724 01:13:15,659 --> 01:13:16,893 ALL: Gutter is a tool! 1725 01:13:16,993 --> 01:13:19,663 We're not gonna protest! 1726 01:13:20,830 --> 01:13:23,066 Here's to Balls and Shaft! 1727 01:13:27,737 --> 01:13:29,005 I scheme and plan for months, 1728 01:13:29,105 --> 01:13:30,339 and it all gets screwed up 1729 01:13:30,474 --> 01:13:32,041 because you can't control the students! 1730 01:13:32,141 --> 01:13:34,077 Never send a woman to do a man's job! 1731 01:13:34,177 --> 01:13:36,746 You cocky, pointy-nosed little Reaganite. 1732 01:13:36,846 --> 01:13:38,314 If you hadn't provoked them, 1733 01:13:38,482 --> 01:13:39,883 we wouldn't be in this mess. 1734 01:13:39,983 --> 01:13:42,486 Excuse me? Reality check here. 1735 01:13:42,552 --> 01:13:43,687 Earth to tall bitch. 1736 01:13:43,787 --> 01:13:45,955 What is your fault? This is. 1737 01:13:46,055 --> 01:13:49,058 Hey, poor boy, go and have your parties 1738 01:13:49,158 --> 01:13:50,627 with all your new friends. 1739 01:13:50,727 --> 01:13:52,061 I can see it now, Andrews, 1740 01:13:52,161 --> 01:13:54,163 you and all the knee-jerk, bleeding-heart liberals, 1741 01:13:54,263 --> 01:13:56,365 sipping tea and playing patty cake 1742 01:13:56,500 --> 01:13:58,134 and those useless hippie potheads, 1743 01:13:58,234 --> 01:13:59,603 those commie-pinko leftists, 1744 01:13:59,703 --> 01:14:02,506 the bunny huggers, the pillow biters-- 1745 01:14:02,572 --> 01:14:03,907 Which ones are the pillow biters? 1746 01:14:04,007 --> 01:14:05,041 The butt-pirates. 1747 01:14:05,141 --> 01:14:07,110 And those beastly man-haters. 1748 01:14:07,210 --> 01:14:08,311 Tell those chicks to shave their pits 1749 01:14:08,545 --> 01:14:09,513 and call me. 1750 01:14:09,546 --> 01:14:11,915 The Goddamn whiny cry-baby minorities, 1751 01:14:12,015 --> 01:14:15,151 you can keep 'em all. 1752 01:14:15,251 --> 01:14:16,586 Rand McPherson, everybody. 1753 01:14:16,686 --> 01:14:17,854 Just remember the 9:30 show 1754 01:14:17,954 --> 01:14:19,823 is completely different from the 7:30 show. 1755 01:14:19,923 --> 01:14:22,125 Enjoy the veal. 1756 01:14:24,928 --> 01:14:26,730 Come on! Come on! 1757 01:14:32,569 --> 01:14:35,539 And in light of your valiant actions to save this house, 1758 01:14:35,572 --> 01:14:37,406 we all think it's time to take part 1759 01:14:37,541 --> 01:14:38,608 in the one tradition left over 1760 01:14:38,708 --> 01:14:40,544 from the dark days of Balls and Shaft. 1761 01:14:40,644 --> 01:14:43,547 Tom Lawrence, prepare yourself... 1762 01:14:44,981 --> 01:14:46,683 for initiation. 1763 01:14:53,256 --> 01:14:56,960 Just try to relax. 1764 01:14:57,060 --> 01:14:58,962 Uh, Droz... 1765 01:14:59,062 --> 01:15:00,363 Yeah. 1766 01:15:00,597 --> 01:15:01,631 There's my bus. 1767 01:15:01,731 --> 01:15:03,833 Oh, man. 1768 01:15:04,968 --> 01:15:06,269 Damn! 1769 01:15:06,369 --> 01:15:08,805 We're just gonna have to get you next year. 1770 01:15:11,775 --> 01:15:12,942 Don't let him scare you. 1771 01:15:13,042 --> 01:15:15,478 It's only hurts for a minute. 1772 01:15:15,579 --> 01:15:16,946 Hey, Gut man, watch the stylings 1773 01:15:17,046 --> 01:15:18,648 on the youngster. 1774 01:15:21,918 --> 01:15:23,186 Nice. 1775 01:15:26,723 --> 01:15:27,857 I'll see ya. 1776 01:15:27,957 --> 01:15:29,392 Aw. Oh. 1777 01:15:29,626 --> 01:15:30,694 In the fall. 1778 01:15:30,794 --> 01:15:33,096 Yeah! Yeah! 1779 01:15:34,130 --> 01:15:35,431 All right, little half-chunk. 1780 01:15:35,665 --> 01:15:37,901 Bye, Tom. 1781 01:15:38,001 --> 01:15:40,604 (All talking at once) 1782 01:15:50,947 --> 01:15:52,882 KATY: Hey, Cecilia. Wait up. 1783 01:15:56,152 --> 01:15:57,286 Am I interrupting anything? 1784 01:15:57,386 --> 01:15:59,823 Oh, no. We were just rehearsing. 1785 01:15:59,923 --> 01:16:01,424 The Nutcracker. 1786 01:16:01,658 --> 01:16:02,458 Really? 1787 01:16:02,692 --> 01:16:03,860 Yeah, on ice. 1788 01:16:04,961 --> 01:16:06,129 Should be pretty decent 1789 01:16:06,229 --> 01:16:07,764 once we get Gutter up on skates. 1790 01:16:07,864 --> 01:16:09,999 God, I think I'd actually pay to see that. 1791 01:16:10,099 --> 01:16:12,135 You would? 1792 01:16:12,235 --> 01:16:13,803 Let's get out of here. You and I. 1793 01:16:13,903 --> 01:16:16,005 Seriously. Just hit the road. 1794 01:16:16,105 --> 01:16:18,307 Actually, I was thinking 1795 01:16:18,407 --> 01:16:21,444 more along the lines of a cup of coffee. 1796 01:16:21,678 --> 01:16:22,646 A cup of coffee? 1797 01:16:22,712 --> 01:16:23,847 Yeah. 1798 01:16:25,248 --> 01:16:26,883 Let's do that. 1799 01:16:31,387 --> 01:16:32,989 Hey, let's drive down. 1800 01:16:33,089 --> 01:16:35,191 Indeed, driving for coffee. 1801 01:16:35,291 --> 01:16:36,826 We don't have a car. 1802 01:16:36,926 --> 01:16:39,162 I do. For the weekend, anyway. 1803 01:16:39,262 --> 01:16:43,399 My aunt lent me her red BMW convertible. 1804 01:16:43,667 --> 01:16:44,768 Really? 1805 01:16:53,209 --> 01:16:55,211 * I've been on tenterhooks 1806 01:16:55,311 --> 01:16:56,980 * Ending in dirty looks 1807 01:16:57,080 --> 01:16:58,514 * Listenin' to the Muzak 1808 01:16:58,682 --> 01:17:00,216 * Thinkin' 'bout this and that * 1809 01:17:00,316 --> 01:17:02,018 * She said, that's that 1810 01:17:02,118 --> 01:17:03,252 * I don't wanna chitter-chat 1811 01:17:03,352 --> 01:17:05,154 Aah! 1812 01:17:05,254 --> 01:17:07,090 * Turn it down flat 1813 01:17:07,190 --> 01:17:08,391 * Pump it up 1814 01:17:08,491 --> 01:17:10,794 * When you don't really need it * 1815 01:17:10,894 --> 01:17:11,895 * Pump it up 1816 01:17:11,995 --> 01:17:14,864 * Until you can feel it 1817 01:17:21,070 --> 01:17:22,371 * Down in the pleasure centre 1818 01:17:22,471 --> 01:17:24,207 * Hell-bent or heaven-sent 1819 01:17:24,307 --> 01:17:25,875 * Listen to the propaganda 1820 01:17:25,975 --> 01:17:27,543 * Listen to the latest slander * 1821 01:17:27,711 --> 01:17:29,212 * There's nothing underhand 1822 01:17:29,312 --> 01:17:30,914 * That she wouldn't understand 1823 01:17:31,014 --> 01:17:32,548 * Pump it up 1824 01:17:32,716 --> 01:17:34,250 * Until you can feel it 1825 01:17:34,350 --> 01:17:36,119 * Pump it up 1826 01:17:36,219 --> 01:17:38,888 * When you don't really need it * 1827 01:17:58,074 --> 01:17:59,809 * Hey 1828 01:18:05,414 --> 01:18:07,050 * She's been a bad girl 1829 01:18:07,150 --> 01:18:08,651 * She's like a chemical 1830 01:18:08,752 --> 01:18:10,386 * Though you try and stop it 1831 01:18:10,486 --> 01:18:12,088 * She's like a narcotic 1832 01:18:12,188 --> 01:18:13,656 * You wanna torture her 1833 01:18:13,757 --> 01:18:15,391 * You wanna talk to her 1834 01:18:15,491 --> 01:18:17,126 * All the things you bought for her * 1835 01:18:17,226 --> 01:18:18,895 * Putting up your temperature * 1836 01:18:18,995 --> 01:18:20,363 * Pump it up 1837 01:18:20,463 --> 01:18:22,231 * Until you can feel it 1838 01:18:22,331 --> 01:18:23,666 * Pump it up 1839 01:18:23,767 --> 01:18:26,870 * When you don't really need it * 1840 01:18:32,976 --> 01:18:34,377 * Out in the fashion show * 1841 01:18:34,477 --> 01:18:36,145 * Down in the bargain bin 1842 01:18:36,245 --> 01:18:37,881 * You put your passion out 1843 01:18:37,981 --> 01:18:39,382 * Under the pressure pin 1844 01:18:39,482 --> 01:18:41,217 * Fall into submission 1845 01:18:41,317 --> 01:18:42,786 * Hit-and-run transmission 1846 01:18:42,852 --> 01:18:45,922 * No use wishin' now for any other * 1847 01:18:46,022 --> 01:18:47,123 * Sin 1848 01:18:47,223 --> 01:18:48,291 * Pump it up 1849 01:18:48,391 --> 01:18:49,859 * Until you can feel it 1850 01:18:49,959 --> 01:18:51,127 * Pump it up 1851 01:18:51,227 --> 01:18:53,930 * When you don't really need it * 1852 01:18:54,798 --> 01:18:57,500 * Don't really need it 1853 01:18:58,401 --> 01:19:00,904 * Don't really need it 1854 01:19:01,805 --> 01:19:04,307 * Don't really need it 1855 01:19:05,174 --> 01:19:07,010 * Don't really need it 1856 01:19:07,110 --> 01:19:08,311 * Pump it up 1857 01:19:08,411 --> 01:19:11,680 * Don't really need it 1858 01:19:11,815 --> 01:19:15,351 * Every time we do the stomp * 1859 01:19:15,451 --> 01:19:19,288 * I'll be starving for the next time that we funk * 1860 01:19:19,388 --> 01:19:23,860 * I'm soaking wet as I recall us on the dance floor * 1861 01:19:23,960 --> 01:19:25,694 * Work up a sweat and wipe it off * 1862 01:19:25,895 --> 01:19:28,097 * Then stomp some more * 1863 01:19:30,399 --> 01:19:34,470 * Ah, ooh ooh ooh 1864 01:19:34,570 --> 01:19:38,407 * Ah, ooh ooh ooh 1865 01:19:38,507 --> 01:19:39,408 * Oh, yeah 1866 01:19:39,508 --> 01:19:40,643 * Ah, ooh 1867 01:19:40,877 --> 01:19:45,714 * Yeah * 1868 01:19:45,849 --> 01:19:48,217 * Stomp stomp stomp stomp 1869 01:19:48,317 --> 01:19:49,886 * People that don't get a chance to dance * 1870 01:19:49,986 --> 01:19:51,855 * Stomp and keep on stompin' * 1871 01:19:51,888 --> 01:19:54,157 * 'Cause there be no second chance * 1872 01:19:54,257 --> 01:19:56,125 * Stomp with me, start stompin' * 1873 01:19:56,225 --> 01:19:57,927 * Please don't stop 1874 01:19:58,027 --> 01:19:59,863 * We won't break till daybreak * 1875 01:19:59,929 --> 01:20:02,932 * Baby, this time, it won't go again * 1876 01:20:03,032 --> 01:20:04,033 * Shake what you got 1877 01:20:04,133 --> 01:20:06,035 * In your pants 1878 01:20:06,135 --> 01:20:09,305 * And only when you're stompin' like this * 1879 01:20:09,405 --> 01:20:11,707 * Stomp now 1880 01:20:11,807 --> 01:20:13,843 * Stomp stomp stomp stomp 1881 01:20:13,943 --> 01:20:15,778 * I'm stomping, you're thumpin' * 1882 01:20:15,879 --> 01:20:17,746 * I'm steppin', you're struttin' * 1883 01:20:17,847 --> 01:20:20,850 * I'm sweatin' my sweat * Till you're wet 1884 01:20:28,457 --> 01:20:30,860 * I'm stompin', you're struttin' * 1885 01:20:30,960 --> 01:20:33,496 * Workin' my sweat till you're wet * 1886 01:20:33,596 --> 01:20:36,065 * Workin' my sweat 1887 01:20:36,165 --> 01:20:38,101 * I'm stompin', you're struttin' * 1888 01:20:38,201 --> 01:20:41,470 * Workin' my sweat till you're wet * 1889 01:20:41,570 --> 01:20:44,540 * Workin' my sweat 115949

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