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1
00:00:03,440 --> 00:00:06,159
# This wheel's on fire
2
00:00:06,360 --> 00:00:11,639
# Rolling down the road
3
00:00:11,840 --> 00:00:16,311
# Best notify my next of kin
4
00:00:16,520 --> 00:00:21,116
# This wheel shall explode
5
00:00:23,720 --> 00:00:27,679
Sweetie! Oh, darling!
6
00:00:29,200 --> 00:00:32,158
Oh, God, sweetie! What a day!
7
00:00:32,360 --> 00:00:35,318
What a day I've had, sweetie, darling!
8
00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:39,872
I have been at work
since I left here this morning.
9
00:00:40,080 --> 00:00:44,995
- You want some lunch?
- No, I had lunch in the studio.
10
00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:48,710
Studio, sweetie, studio.
11
00:00:48,920 --> 00:00:51,150
Studio, darling.
12
00:00:51,360 --> 00:00:53,078
Action, lights, camera.
13
00:00:53,280 --> 00:00:55,316
- What have you been doing?
- Pop-specs ad.
14
00:00:55,520 --> 00:00:59,911
- What?
- You know I represent Pop-specs? New ad.
15
00:01:00,120 --> 00:01:05,069
- What are Pop-specs?
- What are Pop-specs?!
16
00:01:05,280 --> 00:01:08,750
Are you dead? These are them!
17
00:01:08,960 --> 00:01:13,112
Look, darling. These are Pop-specs!
They are great.
18
00:01:13,320 --> 00:01:15,675
Do you see that one?
19
00:01:15,880 --> 00:01:18,235
Here's another one!
20
00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:21,000
Schizophrenia!
21
00:01:21,200 --> 00:01:24,431
- They're fantastic!
- How can you upmarket those?
22
00:01:24,640 --> 00:01:28,235
Patsy has agreed to put them
in a fashion shoot in her magazine.
23
00:01:28,440 --> 00:01:31,557
New ad, sweetie,
mainly my idea. It's very clever.
24
00:01:33,440 --> 00:01:37,558
Otherwise my company are left
with one minor department store,
25
00:01:37,760 --> 00:01:42,993
two student designers, Smudgibars and Lulu
paying for your upkeep, darling.
26
00:01:43,200 --> 00:01:46,112
And Lulu is like that, sweetie.
27
00:01:46,320 --> 00:01:48,675
You could show a little enthusiasm.
28
00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:51,838
Why should I be happy
that you'll spend thousands of pounds...
29
00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:53,996
Hundreds of thousands of pounds.
30
00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:58,318
...persuading people to buy some cheap
bit of plastic that they don't even want?
31
00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:01,193
...don't know they want yet...
32
00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:06,838
...that will then be thrown away
and sit around polluting the planet.
33
00:02:08,880 --> 00:02:14,193
That's it, is it?
Can I show you something, sweetie?
34
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,630
Look! What do you think that is?
35
00:02:16,840 --> 00:02:19,798
- It's a sticker with a green tree on it.
- Yes.
36
00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:24,630
- What does that mean?
- Kind to trees, sweetie.
37
00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:30,919
How are they kind to trees?
38
00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:34,715
They ain't made of wood.
How kind do you want?
39
00:02:34,920 --> 00:02:38,833
What a day! What a long, tedious day!
40
00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:42,271
- It's 2 o'clock!
- I've been at work all day, Pats.
41
00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:46,917
You're a fool! Have you sorted Marrakech?
Have you phoned Humphrey?
42
00:02:47,120 --> 00:02:49,509
- Yes. We can stay at his villa.
- Fantastic!
43
00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:52,518
Marrakech?
Why are you going to Marrakech?
44
00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:54,995
- For the fashion shoot, sweetie.
- Why there?
45
00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:59,113
Are you Magnus Magnusson
all of a sudden?
46
00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:02,995
"Hand on buzzers. " "I don't know. "
"Pass. " Just because, all right?
47
00:03:03,200 --> 00:03:07,830
No, Eddie. Not just because.
These things aren't chosen at random.
48
00:03:08,040 --> 00:03:11,635
- No.
- It's supposed to be really beautiful out there.
49
00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:15,389
You spent Christmases out there
when you were a child.
50
00:03:15,600 --> 00:03:19,878
- You always left me here with Gran.
- Well, you got the postcards.
51
00:03:21,600 --> 00:03:27,072
I'm studying the indigenous people
of that particular region this term.
52
00:03:34,240 --> 00:03:37,312
- Do you want some Bolly, darling?
- Yes, just a smidge.
53
00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:41,559
It would be really great
to be able to go there and study.
54
00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:47,312
- You don't go Marrakech to study, darling.
- No, you don't!
55
00:03:47,520 --> 00:03:51,195
There are lots of reasons to go to Marrakech
and studying is not one of them.
56
00:03:51,400 --> 00:03:55,154
You go to Marrakech for drugs,
dirt-cheap plates and rugs.
57
00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:58,033
Easy-going sex
with gorgeous under-age youths.
58
00:03:59,800 --> 00:04:01,950
Sex changes, doesn't it, Pats?
59
00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:05,355
Well, not now anyway.
60
00:04:05,560 --> 00:04:11,430
Still, darling, you don't go there
to study some ingenious peasants!
61
00:04:11,640 --> 00:04:15,269
- It would really help me with my course.
- No, no, no.
62
00:04:15,520 --> 00:04:17,317
- What?
- Mum...
63
00:04:17,520 --> 00:04:20,512
No, Eddie!
No, to whatever she's going to say!
64
00:04:20,720 --> 00:04:23,234
- I'm talking to my mother!
- Say no, Eddie.
65
00:04:23,440 --> 00:04:25,158
- What?
- Just tell her no.
66
00:04:25,360 --> 00:04:28,193
- I don't understand!
- Let me go to Morocco.
67
00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:31,517
Why not let her go to Morocco?
We're going to Marrakech.
68
00:04:31,720 --> 00:04:34,109
It's in Morocco!
69
00:04:34,320 --> 00:04:38,598
She is trying to slime her way onto a trip,
and we don't want it.
70
00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:41,155
- But, Mum!
- Don't you "But, Mum" her!
71
00:04:41,360 --> 00:04:45,558
- Not once do I get to come!
- I don't want her to come!
72
00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:56,516
- Just do whatever you want.
- Eddie!
73
00:04:56,720 --> 00:05:02,955
Well... But as your mother, I cannot
be held responsible for your well-being.
74
00:05:04,520 --> 00:05:07,478
If you come with us, you're on your own.
75
00:05:08,680 --> 00:05:10,910
Oww!
76
00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:17,070
- She burnt me with her cigarette!
- Accident.
77
00:05:17,560 --> 00:05:20,677
# No, no, no, no!
No, no, no, no!
78
00:05:20,880 --> 00:05:24,111
# No, no, no!
There's no limits...! #
79
00:05:24,320 --> 00:05:25,594
Bubble! Bubble!
80
00:05:25,800 --> 00:05:29,873
Listen, darling. I need to sort out
the Pop-specs business before I go.
81
00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:32,992
- Have you switched everything off upstairs?
- Yes.
82
00:05:33,200 --> 00:05:35,839
- Let's go before she gets back.
- No, stay.
83
00:05:36,040 --> 00:05:40,830
You've got to get the information
and figures and things by next week.
84
00:05:41,040 --> 00:05:43,315
Yes, it's right here.
85
00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:48,110
- Car's here!
- You left the shower and some bubbly mush on!
86
00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:52,154
It was bikini wax for you,
unless you're happy with those sideburns.
87
00:05:53,200 --> 00:05:58,752
- She's not travelling Club, is she?
- No, I put her into Economy. Practically cargo.
88
00:05:58,960 --> 00:06:03,476
- You have got the information, haven't you?
- Most of it, yes.
89
00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:07,150
- Or until the special thing broke.
- Mum.!
90
00:06:07,360 --> 00:06:12,036
- Hang on. What thing?
- The thing that's attached to the typewriter.
91
00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:16,074
Little animal with a ball.
92
00:06:16,280 --> 00:06:20,592
- What animal?
- Little animal, small.
93
00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:24,315
Creeps about, not a rat.
94
00:06:24,520 --> 00:06:26,636
- Gerbil.
- Squirrel? Hedgehog?
95
00:06:26,840 --> 00:06:29,229
Don't panic or we'll never get anywhere.
96
00:06:30,080 --> 00:06:32,799
- A mouse.
- Yes! The mouse.
97
00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:38,950
- That's got a telly with VD.
- The VDU. The word processor.
98
00:06:39,160 --> 00:06:43,756
Yes. That fell off the table
when I took the mouse home.
99
00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:48,795
Eddie, get rid of her!
I'm running to a very tight schedule.
100
00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:52,709
Hang on, I'm coming. This is important.
You broke the computer?!
101
00:06:52,920 --> 00:06:54,911
- Yes!
- When?
102
00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:57,475
Who can say?
103
00:06:57,680 --> 00:07:01,958
Listen, you bloody brainless bimbo,
I need this client!
104
00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:06,676
I don't need some bollocky vegetable
Yankee-bloody-doodle to mess it up for me!
105
00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:11,476
- She's talking to you.
- Just go, just go, just go.
106
00:07:12,520 --> 00:07:15,478
Have you got everything?
- Yes.
107
00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:18,954
Got everything.
108
00:07:21,720 --> 00:07:25,554
Tickets! Money! Passport!
109
00:07:29,480 --> 00:07:33,393
Where is the photographic equipment?
Where's the luggage?
110
00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:38,554
I am sorry. The equipment
must have gone to Tangiers.
111
00:07:38,760 --> 00:07:40,751
The rest, I don't know.
112
00:07:43,920 --> 00:07:46,275
Pop-specs!
113
00:07:56,400 --> 00:07:58,197
Got it!
114
00:07:58,400 --> 00:08:01,392
Mum! That's my bag.
115
00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:03,830
- Unclaimed!
- Mum!
116
00:08:04,040 --> 00:08:06,270
Help Mummy, darling!
117
00:08:06,960 --> 00:08:09,554
It's all right, Ed. Just give me your hand.
118
00:08:20,360 --> 00:08:23,033
Leave it to them. They can sort it out.
119
00:08:23,240 --> 00:08:26,152
Take that look off your face.
I've got stuff in here you can borrow.
120
00:08:26,360 --> 00:08:29,557
- I'd rather wear a yashmak.
- That can be arranged.
121
00:08:29,760 --> 00:08:32,228
Just get in the cab and just go, sweetie.
122
00:08:32,440 --> 00:08:36,797
Prepare yourself for the heat.
You're not used to it.
123
00:08:43,480 --> 00:08:46,950
- Wake up, Mum. We're here.
- Where?
124
00:08:49,120 --> 00:08:53,671
- I'm never going out again.
- Shut up and come on.
125
00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:04,957
- Shower!
- Have you seen Humphrey?
126
00:09:05,160 --> 00:09:08,436
Humphrey est here?
127
00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:11,596
Thank you, darling.
128
00:09:14,080 --> 00:09:15,399
Blup-blup-blup!
129
00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:19,914
- Want some of this?
- No, thank you!
130
00:09:20,120 --> 00:09:23,874
Go on, go on. It's legal here,
so you can't disapprove.
131
00:09:25,920 --> 00:09:28,878
In fact, it's compulsory, darling.
132
00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:32,709
They'll bust you for not
having one of these down here.
133
00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:36,071
We've been here an hour
and already Patsy's got some stuff.
134
00:09:36,280 --> 00:09:39,238
Actually, I brought these with me, Eddie.
135
00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:51,319
Ah, this is the life!
136
00:09:51,520 --> 00:09:55,354
Yes, this is the life.
God, it's all coming back to me now.
137
00:09:55,560 --> 00:10:00,236
- The noise, the smell.
- Yes. It's like everything is on heat.
138
00:10:01,640 --> 00:10:05,474
- Remember that sofa and those tiles?
- Gorgeous.
139
00:10:05,680 --> 00:10:10,595
You know, you can't get those tiles
and fired earth for love nor money any more.
140
00:10:10,800 --> 00:10:14,793
Even in Holland Park, darling.
It's ridiculous.
141
00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:18,115
Over here they're just hanging around
on people's walls.
142
00:10:18,320 --> 00:10:21,232
- Even on peasant's walls.
- Yes.
143
00:10:21,440 --> 00:10:26,036
We dragged these people
screaming into the 20th century.
144
00:10:26,240 --> 00:10:31,917
We gave them all the mod cons.
We gave them the non-squat toilet.
145
00:10:32,120 --> 00:10:34,395
Toilet tissue, darling.
146
00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:37,956
How'd you think
they used to wipe their bottoms?
147
00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:40,310
Old bits of huff-hoof.
148
00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:45,550
Now they can't even be bothered, sweetie,
149
00:10:45,760 --> 00:10:51,039
to send us a few cracked old craft tiles!
I'm fed up with it!
150
00:10:51,760 --> 00:10:55,116
- Are you going to change?
- I haven't got anything!
151
00:10:55,320 --> 00:10:57,993
I thought Patsy offered you the shoot clothes?
152
00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:04,719
As long as she shaves her scabby armpits!
And doesn't sweat over everything.
153
00:11:05,680 --> 00:11:10,310
- I washed these.
- Have you got a travel-wash with you?
154
00:11:11,440 --> 00:11:15,752
If you could try to look
a little less like a Christian missionary,
155
00:11:15,880 --> 00:11:17,871
we'll all be a lot safer.
156
00:11:18,920 --> 00:11:21,036
They're all Muslims round here, you know.
157
00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:30,076
Wow!
158
00:11:30,280 --> 00:11:33,238
Oh, darling, look at those stars.
159
00:11:33,440 --> 00:11:35,590
It's like talcum powder, isn't it?
160
00:11:36,640 --> 00:11:39,632
It's just like it goes on forever.
161
00:11:42,640 --> 00:11:45,393
- Shooting star!
- Where?
162
00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:48,956
- Where, where?
- No, now it's gone.
163
00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:53,791
Say it quicker next time you see it.
164
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:56,719
Mum!
165
00:11:57,760 --> 00:11:59,796
Mum, help me!
166
00:12:01,640 --> 00:12:02,914
Mum!
167
00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:06,358
- Help me! Mum!
- What's happening?
168
00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:10,435
She's being humped by some laundry!
169
00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:15,750
- Humphrey! Darling!
- Good Lord, I didn't see you there.
170
00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:18,155
- I'm so sorry.
- It's only Saffy.
171
00:12:18,360 --> 00:12:21,716
- Humphrey!
- I had a couple of drinks and from behind...
172
00:12:21,920 --> 00:12:24,878
...is the only way she'll ever stand a chance.
173
00:12:26,640 --> 00:12:29,438
- I'm very embarrassed.
- That's OK.
174
00:12:29,640 --> 00:12:34,270
I hope you didn't think
I was some kind of dirty old man.
175
00:12:34,480 --> 00:12:37,233
Oh, good! Because that would never do.
176
00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:40,989
I say! You're like your mother.
177
00:12:41,200 --> 00:12:46,228
A Bordeaux.
178
00:12:46,920 --> 00:12:50,196
Thank you. Now...
179
00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:54,359
- Would you like to try a local speciality?
- Yes, I'd love to.
180
00:12:54,560 --> 00:12:58,712
You take a pot of scented honey
mixed with goat's cheese yoghurt,
181
00:12:58,920 --> 00:13:01,514
sprinkled with almonds
from the Atlas Mountains.
182
00:13:01,720 --> 00:13:06,157
You spread it all over
your naked nubile young body,
183
00:13:06,360 --> 00:13:11,195
and allow a man
old enough to be your father to lick it off.
184
00:13:12,760 --> 00:13:16,514
Just like her mother. Tease, tease, tease.
185
00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:27,433
Are you feeling all right, darling?
Eat up your little cake. Go on.
186
00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:35,839
I'm sorry you got off to
such a bad start with Humphrey, darling.
187
00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:41,028
- And then, you know, then...
- Cigar, old man?
188
00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:49,349
When we first came over, it was so beautiful.
Just like a little, tiny little oasis here.
189
00:13:49,560 --> 00:13:52,120
Yes, with like a town.
190
00:13:52,320 --> 00:13:56,711
You'll find a couple
of quite decent five-star international hotels.
191
00:13:56,920 --> 00:13:59,514
- And an airport.
- Yes, all right!
192
00:13:59,720 --> 00:14:02,632
I was trying to be poetic, but...
193
00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:06,719
I'm studying the indigenous population
of the area. The tribes.
194
00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:11,630
You won't find any of them left.
They're all gone.
195
00:14:11,840 --> 00:14:15,310
They are just a distant memory.
196
00:14:15,520 --> 00:14:18,159
- And then the Berbers.
- I don't remember them.
197
00:14:18,360 --> 00:14:21,830
American couple.
I think I met them at a cocktail party.
198
00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:24,679
The reason people came here no longer exists.
199
00:14:24,880 --> 00:14:28,668
You can get everything you want here
anywhere else much cheaper.
200
00:14:28,880 --> 00:14:32,555
- Yes. Safer.
- What?
201
00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:58,239
- Come on, darling. Sing.
- Yes, come on, Pats.
202
00:15:02,880 --> 00:15:05,838
Let's do that Sonny and Cher number.
203
00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:10,270
# They say I... #
Hang on, I'll just get this chord right.
204
00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:12,277
# They say... # No.
205
00:15:13,320 --> 00:15:16,596
Patsy, old chap.
Shall we leave the girls to it?
206
00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:18,756
Let's do that, old boy.
207
00:15:20,880 --> 00:15:27,592
- Mum, that was Patsy?
- It was only for a year and then it fell off.
208
00:15:30,840 --> 00:15:34,196
I think I'm going to be sick. Help me.
209
00:15:44,760 --> 00:15:48,150
How are you feeling?
I'm feeling good, babe.
210
00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:51,432
Seen Saffy this morning?
Little toad.
211
00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:55,474
Don't worry. I don't think
she remembers anything about last night.
212
00:15:55,680 --> 00:15:57,955
Hush! Here she comes!
213
00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:06,597
Hi, sweetie.
Did you find the swimsuits?
214
00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:12,432
- Haven't you got any low-cut ones?
- I haven't got any knee-length ones, no.
215
00:16:12,640 --> 00:16:17,156
- Have you got cream on, Mum?
- Olive oil. Want some?
216
00:16:17,360 --> 00:16:21,194
- I think I might have a swim first.
- All right, sweetie.
217
00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:23,595
Take this off!
218
00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:27,919
We're just looking at you, darling.
219
00:16:43,640 --> 00:16:46,074
Quite big tits.
220
00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:49,356
Mum!
221
00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:53,348
You should have a wax.
That "delapidatory" cream is no good at all.
222
00:16:54,560 --> 00:16:58,553
You can't just sit by the pool all day.
We could be anywhere.
223
00:16:58,760 --> 00:17:03,993
- I'm not moving.
- We want to recharge after our journey.
224
00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:07,875
- You deserve it.
- And what about all the shopping?
225
00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:10,950
Shopping? Yes, we should.
226
00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:14,357
- We should go shopping, Patsy.
- Oh, I think so.
227
00:17:14,560 --> 00:17:18,712
Before you know it,
they've found the bloody equipment.
228
00:17:19,760 --> 00:17:23,196
- I wish you'd cover yourself up, Mum.
- These people don't mind.
229
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:27,188
I've got to get some jewellery, boxes,
230
00:17:27,400 --> 00:17:31,188
bowls, plates, rugs.
What about you, Pats?
231
00:17:31,400 --> 00:17:35,234
- I'll just get some little gorgeous things.
- We should've got a guide.
232
00:17:35,440 --> 00:17:39,069
I know this place, darling.
I know these people.
233
00:17:45,400 --> 00:17:48,073
What are they looking at?
At you.
234
00:17:48,280 --> 00:17:51,192
I know they're looking at me, darling.
235
00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:55,075
You're never going to see
any of these people ever again.
236
00:17:56,840 --> 00:18:00,515
- Just stare! Hello!
- You're asking for trouble.
237
00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:09,157
You see, that's quite nice.
But that's two a penny in Liberty.
238
00:18:09,360 --> 00:18:12,750
One of those
khaftan things that the women wear.
239
00:18:14,920 --> 00:18:16,478
That's just a pile of crap.
240
00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:20,633
It's so touristy here now, isn't it?
241
00:18:20,840 --> 00:18:25,516
- I know. It has changed.
- It used to be so chic down here.
242
00:18:25,720 --> 00:18:28,598
Ow! That man pinched me.
243
00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:33,749
Darling, don't worry. He's obviously
very old and completely blind.
244
00:18:33,960 --> 00:18:37,111
He didn't pinch me!
No one's pinched me yet!
245
00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:42,915
I don't want the bracelets.
You get those for a penny at Liberty. No!
246
00:18:43,120 --> 00:18:46,032
Sweetie, darlings!
247
00:18:48,080 --> 00:18:51,709
- I'm starving now.
- Do you know what starving means?
248
00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:54,354
I'm hungry! I'm starving!
249
00:18:54,560 --> 00:18:56,869
- I'm starving!
- Stop moaning!
250
00:18:57,080 --> 00:19:00,277
Let's go to the hotel and get a drink.
Don't they have any bars?
251
00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:03,438
- Where's Patsy?
- Just shops with old dried-up things.
252
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:05,596
You should feel at home, then.
253
00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:11,828
- Shall we go to the hotel and get a nice drink?
- Yes, that'll be nice.
254
00:19:13,640 --> 00:19:18,555
- If you're starving, you'd eat this.
- If they took the face off, I'd eat it.
255
00:19:19,600 --> 00:19:23,798
I know where it is.
We go through these little stalls here.
256
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:27,276
We'll just go through here.
Here, darling.
257
00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:31,155
Are you sure?
Well, I don't know, do I?
258
00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:34,716
Hold your nose, darling. Meat!
259
00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:38,993
Just over there. Can you see?
People keep taking things.
260
00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:41,839
We're going over here. Over there.
261
00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:46,158
- I would if I could see where I was going.
- Stop moaning!
262
00:19:46,360 --> 00:19:50,751
I'm trailing behind this little insect.
Shut up!
263
00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:57,551
Where is Saffy?
264
00:19:57,760 --> 00:19:59,512
Saffy!
265
00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:03,156
Eddie! For a couple of hours.
266
00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:05,474
She'll be all right.
267
00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:13,830
That's the last time I ever set foot
in a toilet bowl in north Africa.
268
00:20:14,040 --> 00:20:16,110
I mean, how dare they spit at me?!
269
00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:20,108
A nation that has a pillowcase
with a slit in it as a national costume.
270
00:20:20,320 --> 00:20:26,190
We're back here with clean things, clean air.
Lovely peace and quiet. Lovely gin and tonic.
271
00:20:28,120 --> 00:20:33,990
I know. But I still don't think
you should've sold Saffy like that.
272
00:20:34,200 --> 00:20:38,557
It wasn't just like that. I had to
haggle them up. I got a good exchange rate.
273
00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:44,278
- What did you get?
- One sour-faced rat for 2,000 dirham.
274
00:20:44,480 --> 00:20:46,994
She wanted to see
how the real people lived.
275
00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:51,034
I don't think white slave trade
is quite what she had in mind.
276
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:58,994
- It's not as if she enjoyed a normal life anyway.
- It might bring something out in her.
277
00:20:59,200 --> 00:21:02,112
She might live in painful servitude
for the rest of her life.
278
00:21:02,320 --> 00:21:06,552
Nothing is certain. Not for any of us.
279
00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:08,876
- Cheers, Eddie!
- Cheers!
280
00:21:16,520 --> 00:21:19,478
- For madame.
- Mademoiselle.
281
00:21:21,840 --> 00:21:23,796
I'll overlook it this time.
282
00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:30,038
Patsy Stone. Yes.
283
00:21:31,640 --> 00:21:34,632
Oh, no! Are you sure?
284
00:21:34,840 --> 00:21:38,389
Damn! Damn! Damn!
285
00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:42,878
- Bad news, darling?
- Yes, the equipment has turned up.
286
00:21:43,080 --> 00:21:46,789
They shoot this afternoon.
I'm going to meet them by this wall.
287
00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:53,394
- I don't have to come, do I?
- If you want your sunglasses in the magazine.
288
00:21:56,800 --> 00:22:01,749
- Have you eaten something?
- No. Not since 1973.
289
00:22:17,360 --> 00:22:20,079
This is the wall.
I recognise it from the photograph.
290
00:22:20,280 --> 00:22:22,714
I have to go to see some other people.
291
00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:26,310
- "Vogue" will show you up in the mountains.
- "Vogue"?
292
00:22:26,520 --> 00:22:30,877
Yes. And they have to
arrange catering for a movie.
293
00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:34,629
- What movie?
- Life of Jesus Christ II.
294
00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:40,154
- Who is Jesus these days?
- Charles Dance.
295
00:22:41,440 --> 00:22:43,795
- I'll come back and check on you later.
- No.
296
00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:47,834
No. Go away and don't bother coming back.
Just go and don't come back.
297
00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:52,636
- Are you sure?
- He's working for "Vogue", Eddie.
298
00:22:55,120 --> 00:22:57,873
Have you seen
the way these children are dressed?
299
00:22:58,080 --> 00:23:02,232
It's a hot country. Why do they
put them all in woolly jumpers?
300
00:23:02,440 --> 00:23:06,035
You'd think Gap would have
spotted the hole in the market.
301
00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:10,916
A population that's crying out
for good quality, reasonable kids' casuals.
302
00:23:11,120 --> 00:23:13,793
Oh, shut up, Eddie!
303
00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:19,315
- Do you think they're coming, Pats?
- I need the loo.
304
00:23:22,720 --> 00:23:26,679
- What are we going to do?
- Bastard!
305
00:23:27,720 --> 00:23:30,518
Eddie, I really need to go to the loo now.
306
00:23:30,720 --> 00:23:36,590
We'll just find a hotel or caf� or something.
You can phone, and I'll go to the loo.
307
00:23:37,800 --> 00:23:41,839
There must be a centre of town
somewhere up here.
308
00:23:42,040 --> 00:23:44,270
Order some champagne, darling.
309
00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:52,558
Just go on this side
of the bloody road, darling.
310
00:23:52,760 --> 00:23:55,069
The gutter is all right for you in London.
311
00:23:55,280 --> 00:23:59,796
You go on the gutter
in front of a whole party of your friends.
312
00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:03,913
Now you're not going to dig
a hole and just go here now.
313
00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:08,358
Somewhere over there, somewhere.
314
00:24:18,960 --> 00:24:22,350
This place is enough
to make you want to call Sting.
315
00:24:25,400 --> 00:24:29,552
Look, we'll just take what we need
and dump the suitcase.
316
00:24:30,960 --> 00:24:35,397
We'll be eating each other in an hour.
We're not going to be worrying about luggage.
317
00:24:38,080 --> 00:24:41,356
- But which way do we go?
- I don't know.
318
00:24:41,560 --> 00:24:45,109
- Just follow a donkey, darling.
- There's a donkey.
319
00:24:45,320 --> 00:24:49,472
- Excuse me.
- What is that smell?
320
00:24:50,520 --> 00:24:54,035
I don't know. I think it's fish.
321
00:25:07,320 --> 00:25:10,676
Ow!
What's the matter now, darling?
322
00:25:10,880 --> 00:25:14,873
I thought it was my turn on the donkey.
You said it'd be my turn.
323
00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:18,390
- I'm not moving.
- What's the matter with you anyway?
324
00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:22,036
Don't question me!
325
00:25:26,640 --> 00:25:29,916
There's no bell! Hello?
326
00:25:30,880 --> 00:25:32,598
Hello?
327
00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:37,920
- Have you got a toilet for madame?
- Mademoiselle.
328
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:46,352
- Can't you just go in a hole somewhere?
- Go on, Eddie. Over there.
329
00:25:47,680 --> 00:25:50,148
Come on!
330
00:25:51,680 --> 00:25:54,069
Just let me talk to them, sweetie.
331
00:25:54,280 --> 00:25:59,035
Hotel? Hotel pour le madame?
332
00:25:59,240 --> 00:26:02,915
Oh, he could be
a mass murderer for all we know.
333
00:26:04,840 --> 00:26:07,559
Here? Are you kidding?
334
00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:13,312
This must be it.
Well, it looks fine, actually.
335
00:26:13,520 --> 00:26:15,715
- Stop moaning, Eddie.
- I can't stay here!
336
00:26:15,920 --> 00:26:20,232
Ed, it's lovely. Just let me in here.
337
00:26:28,920 --> 00:26:31,480
I couldn't resist, darling.
338
00:26:31,680 --> 00:26:34,478
Conran might want that, darling.
339
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:38,956
- The bloody donkey is gone!
- Shit!
340
00:26:39,160 --> 00:26:41,958
It's my turn on the bloody donkey!
341
00:26:57,480 --> 00:27:00,392
Mum!
342
00:27:07,480 --> 00:27:09,994
Damn!
343
00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:16,876
Oh, darling! Sweetie.
344
00:27:17,080 --> 00:27:19,992
- Where did you go?
- How are you, darling?
345
00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:22,270
- Patsy.
- Yes, fantastic!
346
00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:24,835
Darling, darling!
347
00:27:25,040 --> 00:27:28,191
Well, what bad luck!
348
00:27:28,400 --> 00:27:32,871
It was a joke!
I didn't think anyone would take you.
349
00:27:33,080 --> 00:27:35,230
It's been a terrible holiday.
350
00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:38,989
- It wasn't a holiday, Eddie!
- It was a holiday!
351
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:43,716
I haven't got any Pop-specs photos,
any merchandise, any shopping.
352
00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:49,552
The only thing I was in danger of sleeping with
was a donkey, and even he did a runner.
353
00:27:49,760 --> 00:27:52,399
You must have a good time
in your few final days.
354
00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:54,670
You must see the real Marrakech.
355
00:27:54,880 --> 00:28:01,718
Everything from sabre-wielding horsemen
to the Elizabeth Taylor caftan.
356
00:28:01,920 --> 00:28:07,950
I'll read from the brochure:
"Marrakech is an Elysium all of its own.
357
00:28:08,160 --> 00:28:13,632
"Wickedly grinning old men,
ready to haggle for hour after hour. "
358
00:28:21,720 --> 00:28:24,439
I want to know as your mother.
359
00:28:24,640 --> 00:28:31,193
"There's no end to the treats in store.
You'll be treated like film stars. "
360
00:28:31,400 --> 00:28:35,552
Like Ava Gardner and...
361
00:28:35,760 --> 00:28:37,478
companion.
362
00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:49,036
Enjoy! Enjoy! I have to go
and see a camel about a hump.
363
00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:54,239
- Here you go.
- Fantastic!
364
00:28:54,440 --> 00:28:55,919
Get plugged in, sweetie.
365
00:29:04,880 --> 00:29:07,838
Come on. Wake up!
366
00:29:10,040 --> 00:29:13,396
Oh, God! Did I fall asleep here?
367
00:29:13,600 --> 00:29:15,318
Damn.
368
00:29:17,440 --> 00:29:19,670
Wake up, Pats! Wake up, darling.
369
00:29:19,880 --> 00:29:24,510
Let's catch up on a bit of luxury, sweetie.
370
00:29:25,560 --> 00:29:29,838
I'm going to have some breakfast
and sit by the pool.
371
00:29:30,040 --> 00:29:32,474
We've got to go, it's Friday.
372
00:29:32,680 --> 00:29:35,831
- Friday?!
- You've been unconscious for three days.
373
00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:39,356
No!
374
00:29:41,640 --> 00:29:43,915
What's that smell?
375
00:29:44,120 --> 00:29:48,079
Is that you, sweetie?
That honey, yoghurty smell?
376
00:29:48,280 --> 00:29:50,555
Is that you?
31509
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