All language subtitles for Party.of.Five.S02E14.DVDRip.XviD-TOPAZ

So is it, like, serious,
more than three dates?

Well, this makes five.
You tell me.

- It's serious.
- It's serious.

You guys are gonna love her.

She's, she's funny,
and, and, and smart.

And, and, and late.

God, I am so late.

Hey, handsome. Cool shirt.

Oh, you wouldn't believe
what happened to me.

I go get my nails done, right?

And this chick is having this
total nervous breakdown.

She caught her boyfriend
cheating on her.

Something. Anyways,
she wouldn't shut up.

The whole time she's
doing my cuticles.

I'm, like, "God, hello, lady,

I have a date, okay?"

- Gina, this is...
- Oh, my God.

I am such a brain donor.
You must be Billy.

Uh, Bailey. Yeah. Hi.

And you are Sharon, Sherry...
Hmm. Whew!

I am so bad with names!

Sarah. I'm really...

Sarah. Duh! How could
I forget that?

We had a cat named
Sarah, but it died.

Cancer. Isn't that funny?

I mean, it's not
funny that it died.

Actually, it's kind of sad.

Anyway.

- Well, it's really nice to...
- Oh, listen.

I'm gonna have whatever
you're having,

but, God, no caffeine or I'm
gonna be bouncing off the walls.

Listen, I gotta hit the wee-wee.

Don't go anywhere.
We'll totally bond.

Did you hear that?

Um, which part?

She thinks I'm handsome.

Hmm.

- And how about this one?
- Oh!

You wore that dress to our
anniversary party, remember?

Yeah, but it hangs kind
of funny on my waist.

Just be thankful you
still have a waist.

Put it in the pile.

There's no reason the homeless shouldn't
have a few stylish things too.

Mm.

I've really missed you.
You know that?

You guys never hang
around the house anymore.

And please, don't tell me it's
because you've outgrown me.

Of course not. We've just been
so busy and all, with school.

I just wish you'd
come over more.

Nobody talks at my house.

Justin's always off
doing a million things,

and his dad's always working.

I don't know what's going
on with those two.

That's why I roped everybody
into this clothing drive.

You know, I thought maybe if we
spent a little time together...

Let me help you with that.

I'm just so glad you
two got back together.

Yeah. Me too.

I mean, you're just...

You're good together. You
know, you're really...

Oh, I'll get it. I'll get it.

- Oh.
- Oh!

Oh.

Um...

Well, I guess we should take
this stuff out to the car, huh?

♪ Everybody wants to live ♪

♪ Like they wanna live ♪

♪ And everybody wants to love ♪

♪ Like they wanna love ♪

♪ Everybody wants to be ♪

♪ Closer to free ♪

♪ Closer to free ♪

No, I swear.

Why do you think he had his
backpack over his lap?

Oh, Jody.

Hey, I don't make the news.

Hey, you want a smoke?

Best one of the day,
right after math.

Uh, I don't know.

I guess.

Hey, anybody got fire?

Dweebs.

Hey, you got a...

Oh, addictive little
suckers, aren't they?

Ms. Schrader. Um, hi.

I, um...

- We were just...
- Looking for a light?

I'd love to help you,

but Principal Bullock would
probably have me flogged.

Come on, Jody. You
know the drill.

I see your mom more
than I see my cat.

And as for you,

your brother's in for
quite a surprise.

Hey, Gina loved you guys.

She went on and on about you.

Really? Gina went on and on?
Wow.

Isn't she a crack-up?

God, she's got this
incredible energy.

Oh, she said to tell you,

uh, next time you
get a migraine,

try cold compresses
and Yogi Tea.

You feeling better?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, it was
just a caffeine headache.

- I'm fine now.
- Good.

Because we're all gonna go see

the new Harrison Ford
movie tonight, my treat.

- Um, Sarah...
- Bailey...

I mean, it was always weird

with just the three of us,

but now that I'm seeing
someone, we can double.

Wait a minute. Did you say
tonight, as in tonight?

Oh, God, I... That's right.
I forgot. We have that...

- That thing.
- The test.

Yeah. He's got a test this week.

And I promised to
help him study.

It covers the Crusades,

and they took, man,
like, forever.

So I gotta get a jump on it.

And I promised to
help him study, so...

- Rain check?
- Yeah. Yeah.

Bye.

Aah!

Oh. Ha-ha.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I'm a little jumpy.

Who are you?

I'm, uh, Charlie Salinger.

Um, Claudia's brother.

Are you Ms. Schrader?

Uh, I'm Emily.

And I'm not really nuts.

I, uh, just quit three
days ago, smoking,

so I'm kind of nuts.

Oh, God. It'll pass.
It'll pass, I hope.

Uh, carrot?

Um, no. No, thanks.

- I already ate.
- Oh.

So, what's this about...
About Claudia?

I got a message that you,
you sent her to detention.

Uh, yeah. Um,
bottom desk drawer.

Would you mind?

- She was smoking?
- In the girls' room.

Um, could you, um, put
those in your pocket?

And button it, okay?

Man, I...

I don't know what's going
on with her lately. It's...

Yeah, well,

you need to talk to her before
it gets out of control.

I mean, before you know it,
she'll be up to a pack a day,

eating cold cereal for dinner

and composing personal ads in
her head, while she puffs away.

And then she'll
probably find herself

on the rebound from an
empty relationship.

And that's when she'll realize

she has to take
charge of her life

and give up smoking and caffeine

and sugar, all in
one fell swoop,

and she'll try to quit.

And that is when she'll find out

how hard it is to
start her life over

without all those crutches.

I mean...

Oh, wow.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I sort of went off
there, didn't I?

That's okay.

I... I think I
know how you feel.

Oh, really? You quit too?

Well, no, but the
starting over part.

Oh, right. Right.

So, anyway, talk to her.

Offer her some kind of deal.

Use positive
reinforcement, something.

Then maybe I won't have to
call you down here again.

Well, that's

not really a problem.

Aren't you gonna yell at me?

I'm not sure yet.

I mean, Ms. Schrader
and I talked,

and we both think that you
probably already know

what a stupid thing you're doing

and how it causes cancer
and emphysema and death.

And I figure you're
probably just doing it

because you think it
makes you look cool,

so what good's yelling gonna do?

So maybe we should just,
you know, be reasonable.

I was thinking maybe we
could work something out.

What happened in there?
You're scaring me.

No, look. What do you
want, within reason?

A new bike? A leather jacket?

Let's make a deal.

I'll give it some thought.

So Emily,

I mean, Ms. Schrader,
what's her story?

She's gotta be what, 25, 26?

Oh, no.

What?

You're amazing,
Charlie, you know that?

Look, you want me
to quit smoking?

It won't cost you a penny.

Just stay away from my teacher.

- Claudia.
- No. I mean it.

The last thing I need is you making Ms.
Schrader miserable,

which is exactly what
you'll end up doing.

Hey, you said anything
within reason.

Well, this seems pretty
reasonable to me.

Deal?

Okay. Okay.

Deal.

Hey, this song's kinda cool.

You know what? Maybe
we should cover this.

Maybe.

Oh, my God! Look who's here!

Will!

Gina.

Can you believe it, we were
just talking about you!

Yeah. I was telling her about
that test you were cramming for.

Yeah. Yeah.

Well, you know, we just, uh,
kinda got burnt out, so...

Yeah, it was too late to
meet you guys at the movies.

Oh, you didn't miss anything.

The only seats that were left

were, like, in the front
row, on the side.

So the screen was like
this huge trapezoid,

or whatever shape you wanna call it.
You know, like this...

We left right after the previews.
It was awful.

- Wasn't it, Will?
- Totally. It was...

We're glad we left. Because
now we get to see you.

- Hello!
- Hello.

Whoo! Sucky tune!

Doesn't he look cute tonight?

Come on, Willy.

On the dance floor, now.

You had to study, huh?

Right.

Look, I'm sorry to drag you
both in here like this.

I know it's embarrassing,

and I don't even wanna be having
this conversation, but...

Maybe we should've realized
this was going on.

I don't know.

The fact is,

you're too young.

Oh, come on. Like you guys didn't
have sex before you were married?

What if something
happened, Justin?

Have you thought about that?

- Have you?
- I'm sorry.

- I mean, we're sorry.
- No, no. We're not sorry.

I don't know what
the big deal is.

I mean, we're always careful...

Justin, that's not the point.

We know that you two are
always responsible.

Then why are you acting like we
blew up a building or something?

I mean, we're careful.
We're not hurting anybody.

- I don't wanna hear this...
- Whoa. Whoa. Wait a second.

Your mother's talking
to you now, Justin.

Meaning what?

You don't have anything to add?

You know what, I'm getting sick
and tired of your attitude

and you continue this, we're
gonna have a problem!

- You guys, come on.
- Justin, you...

Will you cut it out, please!

Can we just, please,
talk about this?

Justin, you think
nothing's gonna happen,

but it can.

And then what?

Julia, I know what's
going on with you.

I think you're letting your
hormones make decisions for you.

That is dangerous.
It's a mistake.

And it has to stop.

I'm sorry, but that's
not a request.

Yeah, well, why don't you guys
stay out of our business,

and we'll stay out of yours.

Come on, Julia.

Justin!

Justin!

Justin!

Nah, it was just, you know,

crazy in that place. And so,

I guess we just lost
you in the crowd.

I mean, we looked for
you before we left.

When we couldn't find you,

we just figured you
guys took off, so...

Man, why don't you, why don't
you just come out and say it?

Say what?

You don't like her.

What?

Will, come on.

It's not that I don't like her.
It's...

I mean, she's great.
You know, she's great.

You know, she just...

She never stops talking, though.

She's got a lot of energy.
That's all.

And she's not like that when
it's just the two of us.

She gets nervous around people.
You have to get to know her.

That's pretty hard to do when she
never lets you finish a sentence.

And she's kind of
opinionated, don't you think?

What, and you aren't?

Look, I'm your best
friend, right?

Debatable at the moment.

And if your best friend
can't tell you stuff,

you know, or make, like,
observations, then who can?

So I just think that

Gina's great and all.

She is, but...

I just think that

you could do better.

Hmm.

I like her, Bay.

She makes me laugh.

Then... Then all that
stuff I just said,

forget about it.

Really.

So, what are you saying?

You don't wanna sleep
with me anymore

because my parents disapprove?

Well, no. Of course not.

It's just, now we
have to sneak around,

and that feels kinda icky.

Yeah, but we've been
sneaking around.

Come on, Jule, just don't
let this freak you out.

I mean, so what?

We just don't do it
at my house anymore.

- Big deal.
- Yeah, I know.

It was just the way your mom was
looking at me like I'm a slut.

All right. Stop it. You know
she doesn't think that.

She's a mom. It's her
job to overreact.

And my dad? I mean, he has
no right to lecture anybody.

I mean, he's cheating on her.

That's not even a
double standard.

That's, like, quadruple.

Come on.

They're just trying to take
all the fun out of this.

Justin.

Please don't tell me
that it's working.

Look, I don't know about you,

but I can't just stop.

I mean, I want you,
like, all the time,

and that's something
that can't just go away

because my parents
say it should.

Well, maybe if we just
do it at my house.

Okay.

Tomorrow, sets, subsets
and supersets.

The fun continues.

Claudia, got a minute?

Um...

Sure, Ms. Schrader.

Just wanted to check in.

See how it was going
with the smoking.

Did your brother talk to you?

Uh, yes, ma'am. Thanks.

Uh, we sort of
worked out a deal.

Good. Good. I know how
hard it is to quit.

Day four for me.

I think I'm finally past
the irritability stage.

I'm working through denial.

Of course, I'd still kill
puppies for a cigarette,

but that should go away in
another, oh, 20 years or so.

Mm. Carrot?

Well, I never really got
hooked, so it's not too bad.

Hmm. You're lucky.

And you're lucky to have
somebody like, um...

Charlie? Is that his name?

...to support you in this.

You know, I gotta go it alone.

I mean, it's great that
you guys are so close,

even though there's this
huge gap in your ages.

I mean, he's gotta be
what, hmm, 23, 24?

- Twenty-five, actually.
- Oh.

And if your next question is

whether he's seeing
anyone or not,

well, the answer is no.

But that seems to change
from minute to minute,

so I can't really say for sure.

Claudia, we're
talking about you.

I've been around the block a few
times on this one, Ms. Schrader,

so I can spot the symptoms.

Let me put this in terms
you'll understand.

Let's say "A" is
the group of women

Charlie has dated in,

oh, the past five years.

This is not to scale.

It should be bigger.

And "B"

is the set of women whose
lives he's left in shambles.

"A" equals "B," Ms. Schrader.

Trust me.

He was totally sexy in
Sleepless in Seattle.

And I cried throughout
all of Philadelphia.

That scene where he's
listening to that woman sing.

Oh, Maria Callas? Oh, my God...

I'm welling up just
thinking about it.

- It was just so...
- Gina.

Gina, maybe you should
let Sarah finish.

Excuse me?

No. No, no. That's okay. I was just
gonna say I loved it too. That's all.

What about, uh... What
about Forrest Gump?

He was amazing in that.

Oh. Well, yeah. If you
like that sort of thing.

Well, you just said that you
loved all of his movies.

Mm. It's not that
I didn't like it.

It's just, I sort of, you know...
I hated it.

I mean, if they wanted to
make a movie about a moron,

they could have filmed
my science teacher.

Hey, uh, did you guys catch
that, that Warriors game?

Will? I am talking here, okay?

I mean, all that "Life is like
a box of chocolate" stuff...

Whew!

I thought I'd just crawl
out of my skin and die.

- All right?
- Look, a lot of people loved it.

Okay? It made millions.
Foreign and domestic.

Okay, I was just trying
to have a conversation.

This is our
responsibility, Charlie.

We-we've gotta make some rules.

What do you want me to say?

I mean, yeah, sure, I could tell Julia
not to let him come over anymore,

but I doubt that's
gonna do any good.

I don't know what goes on
in this house anymore.

Look, I know you work a lot.
But there's gotta be some...

Look, Mrs. Thompson, no offense,

but I kind of remember
what it was like to be 16.

I had to take my girlfriend

to this parking lot
in the Presidio.

Well, you're not 16 anymore.

You are the adult in this house,

and we are talking
about your sister.

And I hear what you're saying.

It's just, the way I see it,

as long as they're gonna do it,

and as long as they're,
you know, careful,

I'd just as soon see
them someplace safe

and not in a car parked in
the middle of a parking lot,

which is exactly where
they're gonna be

if we try to lay down
some kind of law.

You're not gonna
help me with this?

Mrs. Thompson...

I worry about you, Julia.

No one is looking out for you.

Thanks, Charlie, for
being cool about this.

I'm not cool, okay?

If you're stupid enough
to be having sex,

risking getting pregnant and God knows
what else, that's your business.

But don't think that I'm happy
about it, because I'm not.

I never wanna lose you.

That's all I'm trying to say,

and I'm never gonna.

Ow. Mm!

- What?
- The remote.

Good night.

Bay?

- Hello?
- In here, Will!

You're alone.

You could say that.

Did something just happen?

I don't know. We...

We sort of had this fight.

I said some things I
probably shouldn't have.

And she said some things she
definitely shouldn't have.

Oh, I'm, I'm sure if
you talk about it...

Nah. Not much point.

I mean, it wasn't really
working out, anyway,

and so we decided to break up.

Really?

Really?

Yeah.

So...

I guess that's that.

Wow.

I'm sorry.

Yeah. Me too.

Maybe I'll just hang out with
you guys for a little bit.

If that's okay with you guys.

Sure.

Sure.

Not a problem.

Hey, Charlie.

The lady on table seven has
a couple of music requests.

Did you tell her
we don't have a...

"Help" and "Rescue me."

There, uh, were no binoculars
in the crow's-nests.

And you know, I mean,
without binoculars.

You know, of course.

But everybody thinks it sank

because the iceberg tore
a huge gash in the hull

when, actually, the
plates buckled

and popped their rivets.

Really?

Wow.

Wow. You certainly know a
lot about the Titanic.

Well, it's kind of
a hobby of mine.

Disasters at sea.

And not just the Titanic.

You know the Andrea Doria?

Excuse me.

Uh, are you Emily Schrader?

That's me.

You, uh... You have a phone call

at the bar.

Wow. Oh, wow. Ha-ha.

- Excuse me, Bob.
- Sure.

Blind date?

It happens every time.

You break up, and people
start playing matchmaker.

This was Principal
Bullock's chiropractor,

so I couldn't exactly refuse.

And you just happened
to be at Salinger's.

Call it a wild coincidence.

Just in case you want
it to look real.

This is so mean.

God, what do I tell him?

How about, uh,

your neighbor called,

and there's an emergency
with your dog,

and you have to take
him to the vet?

Wow, impressive. I like that.

But what if he asks
me out tomorrow?

Tell him you already
have a date.

Good.

I like that too.

So... So Dan Campbell gave me

these extra tickets to
the Sharks on Saturday.

Center ice. I thought
maybe we could, uh...

I... I got plans.

Ah, come on, Justin. We...

You didn't have to go to him,
you know, Charlie, I mean.

If your parents were alive,
I would have gone to them.

Belts, belts.

What are we doing with belts?

Over there.

I just don't get it.

I mean, it's not like we're
being irresponsible.

I mean, I went to a
doctor and we're careful,

and we love each other.

And what if you get pregnant?
What happens then?

I'm not gonna get pregnant.

You don't know that, Julia.

Look, I worry about my
son, but let's be honest,

girls bear the brunt of it.

You're the one who's gonna
have to live with it.

And no matter what happens,

it's gonna affect you for
the rest of your life.

You know, I thought
we were friends.

You don't need a
friend right now.

You need an adult in your life

who's gonna tell you if
you're making a mistake,

someone who can explain
consequences...

Oh, you're not my mother.

Oh!

You're amazing.

All those different positions.
I could barely keep up.

Mm.

You were pretty...

Pretty good yourself.

Hmm.

Did that feel good or what?

Oh, yeah.

But, uh, next time, I pick.

Dinner and a movie.

- It's safer.
- Oh.

So, um, you're a
real expert at this.

It's my second time.

I'm really proud of myself
for sticking with it too.

You know? Part of the
new, healthier me.

It's funny, I can't
exactly picture you

with a cigarette hanging
out of your mouth.

How long did you smoke, anyway?

Since college.

I fell in with the cheap
wine and poetry crowd.

And my ex-boyfriend, Wayne,

all we had in
common was menthol.

It got to the point, we'd go
to bed, skip sex and light up.

That's when I knew
we had a problem.

- That's sad.
- Mm.

Tragic.

I think it's 'cause we sorta
jumped past "get to know you"

and went right to hot and heavy.

I tend to do that.

It's sort of a character flaw.

Really? Me too.

I'm trying to learn
to take things slow

and stop jumping
into everything.

Hmm.

So what movie did
you have in mind?

You pick.

Oh, thanks.

- Hey.
- Hey.

You mind?

No. No, absolutely.
Of course not.

You know what? Actually,
you can help me.

I need a rhyme for star,

but nothing like
far, car or bar.

Something cool like caviar.

Guitar?

That's perfect. That's
absolutely perfect.

"With my guitar."

So I've been thinking,

maybe I should ask someone
out or something.

Hey, that's a good idea.

Yeah, I mean, the best way
to get over something

is to throw yourself back
out there, you know.

So who were you thinking of?

Nobody yet.

Oh, well, what about Dana? She
thinks you're really cute.

No.

She pops her gum,
drives me nuts.

Valerie Shoemaker?

Friends with Gina's sister.

Oh, yeah.

Wow. You writing a love song?

Yeah. Yeah. I'm gonna give it

to the guys in the band and see
if they can put a tune to it.

But don't tell Bailey, okay?

Because I wanna sing it for him

for our two-month anniversary.

I know it's kind of corny.

No, no, it's, uh,

really sweet.

You know, what about
Cindy Pickard?

I mean, she's perfect for you.

No, she's got that
adenoid thing.

I'll catch up with
you, all right?

You okay?

Yeah. I just needed
to take a minute.

If you're coming
down with something,

I mean, maybe we
can take you home.

I'm not coming down
with something.

Mrs. Thompson...

Julia, I'm fine. Please.

Wait a minute. Are you...

I teased your mother about this

when it happened
to her with Owen.

I gave her such a hard time

for her getting carried
away like a teenager,

not being careful.

Wow. Justin didn't tell me...

He doesn't know yet.

I'm still trying to get
used to it myself.

But this is a good thing, right?

I don't know.

There are good times
to get pregnant,

and there are not-so-good times.

Things happen.

No matter how careful you are...

You just never know.

Okay.

- Taste test.
- Okay.

Mm.

Garlic.

Don't mind me.

Ross's date had the flu,

so he didn't need a
babysitter after all.

Claudia, um...

Emily and I...

I mean, Ms. Schrader and
I, we're just, uh...

Having a parent-teacher
conference?

Well, no. You see, um...

Claudia!

You couldn't do it,
Charlie, could you?

One stupid little thing,

and you couldn't do it.

Well, look who's still
carrying cigarettes around.

Hey, I'm keeping
them for Jody, okay?

Look, I haven't smoked any

since I thought we
had an agreement.

But obviously you have a few
bad habits you can't break.

No offense, Ms. Schrader.

That was the deal you made?

Emily...

I should probably just go.

Hey, man.

You want something?

'Cause I'm kind of busy here.

So I see.

Come on, Will.

You're taking this kind
of hard, don't you think?

I mean, you only went out
with her like, what,

like, six times or something.

Man, I don't know who's the
bigger jerk here, me or you.

Excuse me?

You for opening your stupid
mouth in the first place,

or me for listening to you.

Hey, come on, Will...

Who the hell do you
think you are, Bay?

You know, I never
knew you were so...

You had no right to say all that
stuff about Gina. No right.

Okay. Okay.

- I'm sorry.
- No.

No. You know what?

Sorry doesn't cut it this time.

You get everything, Bay.

Everything you want
comes so easy to you.

Apart from grades.

And you don't realize.

Like... Like with Sarah.

You wanted Sarah back,
and poof, she's yours.

Wait a second. Is
this about Sarah?

No, it's not about Sarah.
It's about you.

It's about the fact that

I finally find
somebody that I like,

somebody who really likes me,
somebody who laughs at my jokes

and who thinks I'm handsome.

And you-you with
your perfect hair

and your straight teeth
and your stupid dimples,

say that she talks too much

and she's opinionated
and she's...

Whatever!

But you know what?

I don't care what you think.

I like Gina.

And I'm gonna talk to her,

and I'm gonna give her the
greatest apology in history

and I'm gonna pray to God
that she'll forgive me.

And you can just keep your
stupid opinions to yourself.

I mean, here's my mom

sitting me down,

telling me she's
gonna have a baby.

And I'm trying to smile.

I say, "Wow, Mom, that's great.
That's really cool."

And I'm trying to make
myself believe that,

because I know I should.

But the whole time, I'm
thinking about my dad,

who's with this other woman...

- Justin...
- And it...

No, it is sick!

I have to tell her, and
it's not like before

where I just had to get it
off my chest, all right?

All that's gonna do is
hurt her, and right now...

She has to know!

And if you're the
one who tells her,

I mean, if that comes
from you and not him,

her marriage is over.

And she'll be alone
and having a baby.

I-Is that what you really want?

So maybe it isn't your
mom you need to talk to.

And he's making out with her.

I mean, right there
in the kitchen.

Ms. Schrader?

Man, tongues and everything?

And they were, like, you know,

like groping?

Jody, that is so not the point.

Okay, everybody, pop quiz!

Books on the floor,

and no talking.

Um, Ms. Schrader, you said we
wouldn't have any pop quizzes.

What do you know? I
changed my mind.

I thought you said things were
going pretty well last night?

No. I was trying to tell you.
I made them stop.

I am sick of you people

not paying attention in class,

so this quiz is going to
count as a regular test

on your final grade.

Oh, man.

Don't you get it, Claud?
She's frustrated.

I mean, she already
gave up smoking.

That's enough to
piss anybody off.

And now this guy comes along,

and she's, like, attracted
and stuff, you know?

And now she can't
have that either.

Jody, Claudia,

I said no talking!

Now, that's two points
off for both of you.

Oh, man, this chick
needs it bad.

And right now,

you're sort of the only
thing standing in her way.

Now the muon

is a heavy electron,

and it can carry a
positive charge,

a negative charge.

And the pion is heavier
than the muon.

Now, the pion can have
a positive charge,

a negative charge,
or no charge at all.

Now, who wants to take a stab

at elementary particles?

Bailey?

Elementary particles are

like, particles that are

you know, elementary.

Yes, well, thank you.
Anyone else?

You see,

each particle

has its own antiparticle,

only-only with a
different charge.

And

if there's

two particles,

and they're, say,
like, best friends,

and the one particle

says something bad about the
other particle's antiparticle,

then it can set off, like,
this nuclear reaction.

Sit down, Bailey.

I'm not done yet, sir.

You see, the...

The one particle,

the one that said all
of the bad stuff,

that's called the

butthead particle.

And

he owed it to the other particle

to keep his stupid mouth
shut in the first place.

Hi.

Go home.

- Bye.
- Charlie!

All right, Claudia, this is...
This is how it is.

I've thought a lot about this... This...
This whole thing with Emily, Ms. Schrader.

And, uh...

And you are not the boss.
I am the boss.

- Me. Not you.
- You're the boss.

And that means that you
don't tell me what to do.

And you don't blackmail me.

- Okay. -I'm gonna date
whoever I want to.

And whatever happens with us
that, that is our business.

- Not yours.
- Okay.

I need this right now.

And maybe you don't care
about that, but I do.

- This is a good thing for me.
- You're right.

And, and all deals are off. You're
gonna quit smoking right now.

I don't ever wanna hear
another word about...

Okay.

What?

I said okay.

I mean, you're right.

I've overstepped my boundaries.

So you wanna date
my math teacher.

Who am I to say anything?

Go with my blessing.

I gotta know, dad.

I gotta know so I
can deal with it.

It's over, Justin.

If you didn't walk out of the
room every time I come in,

you'd know that by now.

You know, it was over
a long time ago.

Okay, okay, fine.

But I'm the one who still
carries it around all the time,

and I'm sick of it.

So you gotta tell her,

'cause if you don't...

She already knows.

I told her.

And it's not easy.

And we're working on it.

You know, uh, look, Justin,

things just kind of happen

in marriages, son.

It's just... It
gets complicated.

But the truth of the matter is

that-that I love this baby.

I'm-I'm happy about this baby

because I love your mother.

And we're, we're gonna
just see this through.

You know what?

Justin, this-this
isn't your issue.

This is, uh... This is between

your mother and me.

Fine.

It's none of my business.

Just like what I do with Julia

is none of your business.

No. Wait. Wait. Justin, wait.

- No, no. I made some mistakes.
- Yeah.

I made some bad mistakes,
but I love you.

And I'm not gonna give up

my right to worry about you
and to care about you.

And I'm not gonna stop
trying to make sure

that you do the right thing.

Because, no matter what,

I am still your father.

- Hey.
- Ah!

God, you scared me.

Again.

I'm sorry.

You really shouldn't be here.

Right now, the only thing worse
than you being in my classroom

would be you in my
classroom, smoking, so...

This really isn't gonna work.

- It's okay.
- No, it isn't.

I like you, Charlie. I do.

But with Claudia involved,

it's just a little weird.

That's what I'm
trying to tell you.

It's okay. Claudia's okay.

She

gave us her blessing.

Really?

Really?

So what does this mean exactly?

Have you been smoking?

Oh! Just one.

Hey, I had a bad day, okay?

But maybe things are looking up.

I must really love you.

It's for Will.

- Hey.
- Hi, strangers.

I missed you two.

Uh, can we join you?

It's okay.

Sit your butts down.

You won't believe how
Will apologized to me.

Hey, they probably don't wanna
hear about this, actually.

Are you kidding?

Of course we do.

Well, he actually stood on
my front lawn and sang.

With his guitar!

I didn't know you sing.

Does he ever!

He's standing, singing
"Baby, Come Back."

Then, all of a sudden, the
sprinklers go off. I swear.

Just tinkling everywhere.
You know what he does?

Nothing.

He just stands there,

singing and playing his guitar.

Oh, gosh, it was something
like out of a movie.

You dog.

It's... It's really sweet.

Yeah.

Yeah, well, anyway,

um, we were just talking about

whether or not

Madonna would ever get her
career back on track.

Really?

So, Gina, what do you think?

Well, I think she should
just get on a boat

and drift off to sea.

Honey, hello! Get over yourself.

You're not that great.

You know, we probably
shouldn't be here.

Two kids, alone
in a big house...

with clean sheets and
raging hormones,

without the benefit
of adult supervision.

Gets kind of complicated, huh?

Sex, I mean.

Seems pretty simple to me.

You just take off your
clothes and then you...

You know what I mean.

I mean, think about
your parents.

That's the last thing I wanna
think about right now.

And we're always
gonna be careful?

Always.

I mean, what would you do

if, you know, something
like that happened to me?

It's not gonna happen.

Just something to think
about, that's all.

Can we think about it later?

I kind of have a curfew.

Sure.

Later.