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♪ ♪
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♪ ♪
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Hello, viewers,
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00:00:35,520 --> 00:00:38,920
you join me in an exciting place
at a critical time.
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It is 5:45 in the morning.
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I am in a land that is equally
fascinating and baffling;
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a country that is charming
and hospitable,
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00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:52,920
but where we from the West
tread in fear and trepidation,
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believing that the slightest
transgression of good etiquette
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is like slapping somebody's
sainted mother in the face.
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It's a country I've been to
many times before
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00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:04,120
but never really understood.
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So join me over six episodes
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as I explore
the enduring mystery
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that is the land of this...
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Which was supposed to be
the rising sun,
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but it hasn't really worked out,
has it?
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It's a good job
it didn't look like that
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when they named Japan,
otherwise it would be
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the Land of the Gray Overcast.
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The flag would be rubbish.
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♪ ♪
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(gong clangs)
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JAMES:
We all know travelogues:
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beautiful views,
tranquil music,
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exquisite local food,
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00:01:55,120 --> 00:01:56,640
some traditional dress,
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and the presenter saying
something charming
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and English to a local.
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-Are you mad?
-(laughs)
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And we all think
we sort of know Japan.
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Cherry blossom,
very busy crossroads,
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kei cars, samurai,
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and seizure-inducing
animations.
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I've got a part,
owing to my excellent
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Japanese language skills.
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I'm a dog.
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(indistinct shouting
in Japanese)
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(barking)
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But dig a little deeper,
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and from the most
tranquil vistas
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to the most built-up
metropoles,
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there is unearthed
a fascinating land
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of contradictions:
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the ancient clashing
with the new.
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The courteous meeting
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-the furious.
-(shouts)
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The musical and the karaoke.
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♪ Touch me, touch me now. ♪
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The microscopic...
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If I clean your ears,
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the video inside of your ears
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is displayed on your iPhone.
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-Isn't that fantastic?
-No.
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...and the ginormous.
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This is the weirdest thing
I've ever driven.
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James, I'm coming to shoot you.
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JAMES:
Yes!
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And Japan's private parts
are rather public.
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-Today, we have this, uh,
penis festival.
-Mm.
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So join me as I venture forth
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in peak physical condition...
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That's very slippery.
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...traveling by land, sea, air,
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-and go-kart...
-(horn honking)
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...as I journey
from Japan's icy north
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all the way
to its balmy south.
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A British bloke
trying to fit in.
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I can't, I feel like a pervert.
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-Literally risking my life...
-(grunts)
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...to find out
just what makes Japan...
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TRAVEL ROBOT:
Traveling is kind of
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getting me excited.
Mmm-mmm-mmm.
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You can adjust how strong
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-you want to clean your asshole.
-Yes. Yes.
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Forwards to Tokyo.
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Plus, yes,
some beautiful views.
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A bit of exquisite
local food...
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-Oh, Jesus Christ.
-(laughs)
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...and traditional-ish dress.
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In advance.
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Right, well, you've seen
all the good bits now,
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so here's me
driving down a road.
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My actual purpose
in coming here,
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because I'm fascinated
by the place,
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is not to simply look
at all the tourist sites
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and go,
"Ooh, isn't that lovely"
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and "isn't that unusual."
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It's to actually find out
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what Japan and being Japanese
is about,
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because it is quite possibly
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the most "abroad" place
you can go as a British person.
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Everything about it
is slightly alien,
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00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:50,440
slightly surprising,
and, dare I say it, confusing.
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In the interests of that,
I've decided not to start
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at the busy Shibuya Junction,
or cooing over Mount Fuji,
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or even buying ladies' panties
from a vending machine
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in a dark alley.
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Instead, I'm starting here.
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The icy, northernmost island
of Hokkaido.
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If somebody mentions Japan,
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you don't really think
of this vast, snowy emptiness.
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Now, Hokkaido
has only actually been
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00:05:18,920 --> 00:05:21,600
part of Japan
for the last 150 years or so.
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It's about 20% of the land mass
of the whole country,
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but only has five percent
of its population.
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A lot of it looks like this
and is very, very pretty.
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♪ ♪
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Amazingly, Hokkaido sits
at the same latitude
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as the south of France,
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which is what
I'm telling myself
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as I leave the heated seat
of my car
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to deliver a long piece
to camera
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with rapidly retreating
testicles.
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Now bear with me on this one.
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In 1957 there was
a Japanese expedition
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to Antarctica using dogs
and sleds.
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Now, the expedition
was a disaster.
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It had to be abandoned
and the dogs were left behind.
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00:06:02,480 --> 00:06:04,520
When another expedition
went out a year later,
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they found, amazingly,
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that two of them
were still alive.
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Those two dogs became
national heroes of Japan.
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And as a result of that,
it became fashionable in Japan
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to own a husky-type dog.
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And as a result of that,
the leisure sport
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of dogsledding returned
to Japan.
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I've come here to this, uh,
remote part of Hokkaido
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where they do dogsledding
using a descendant
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of the Russian version
of the sleigh dog,
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known as the Ruski Huskiski.
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And let's be honest,
what could be better than this?
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This beautiful scenery,
the silence of a sledge.
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It's gonna be like being
Prokofiev, it'll be fabulous.
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♪ ♪
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Right, James, only one
in a million people
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will get that reference
to Prokofiev at the end.
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00:06:57,560 --> 00:06:59,560
Well, they might just think,
"There goes James being
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00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:01,720
a bit pompous
and intellectual again."
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Am I being pompous
and intellectual?
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Nobody's ever said that about--
well, they've said pompous,
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but they haven't said
intellectual.
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Am I being pompous
and intellectual, viewers?
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Press the red button now.
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I am.
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00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:15,880
Well, all right, shall we just
do the end bit again then
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and I'll say
it's gonna be like being...
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It's gonna be like
being Raymond Briggs.
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SEAN:
What about Elsa from Frozen?
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-What?
-(Sean laughing)
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I decided to let it go.
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Helping me learn the ropes
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is local sled-head Mr. Terada.
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Not too much brake.
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-I can't ski.
-(laughter)
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As Terada-san releases
the hounds, I try
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00:07:53,720 --> 00:07:55,640
desperately to remember
the crash course he's given me.
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Irony noted.
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I stand on here.
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If it's going slowly,
I can stand like that,
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00:08:01,320 --> 00:08:03,360
but if it's accelerating
or going around bends,
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I've got to crouch,
a bit like a pooping dog,
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-and move my weight like that.
-(dogs barking)
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And if you come and have
a look at this,
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when you start panicking,
there is a brake,
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00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:16,720
which is sort of two paddles
that go down into the snow,
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so I can stamp on that panic
and squeal like a girl.
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And the words I need to know
are "Daru,"
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that's the name of the lead dog.
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Hai.
(shouts)
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That meant "go."
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Whoa, that's tr...
(laughs)
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(barking)
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That's a lot faster
than I expected.
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(shouts)
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SEAN:
Oh, whoa.
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(laughs)
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I wasn't expecting that bit.
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(dogs barking)
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Can you go a bit slower?
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-SEAN: Put the brake on.
-Oh, put the brake on.
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Okay.
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00:09:05,720 --> 00:09:07,640
Oh, God, there's a bendy bit
coming up.
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Can't steer!
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Whoa!
(laughs)
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Whoa!
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JAMES:
Sorry.
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Eventually, though, my runnings
finally started becoming cool.
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Right.
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(whistles)
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So, I don't know
how these relatively small dogs
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pull this enormous sled
with big fat me on it.
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00:09:44,520 --> 00:09:45,880
Whoa!
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This is exhausting.
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(exhales)
I wish I had more time
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00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:56,640
to appreciate
the lovely scenery here,
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00:09:56,640 --> 00:09:59,440
but I'm desperately trying
to hang onto this bloody thing.
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Hai, hai, hai!
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00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:04,640
Go wide, in Japanese.
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00:10:05,880 --> 00:10:07,480
Whoa.
201
00:10:07,520 --> 00:10:10,640
I'm using a little bit
of braking-- whoa, whoa, whoa!
202
00:10:17,360 --> 00:10:19,640
Stop, stop, stop!
(exhales)
203
00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:21,280
-Stopped.
-TERADA: Oh, very nice.
204
00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:23,640
(panting)
205
00:10:23,640 --> 00:10:25,280
-Okay. Yes.
-Change, change.
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00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:26,720
Here, have...
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00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:30,880
Geez, that's the...
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00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:32,960
that's the hardest thing
I've ever done.
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00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,640
(laughs)
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00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:38,520
(exhales)
Cut.
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Here come the rest of the crew
in the luxury of a Ski-Doo.
212
00:10:46,160 --> 00:10:48,760
Oh, well done, everyone.
213
00:10:54,440 --> 00:10:58,400
They didn't even stop
to say congratulations.
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00:10:58,440 --> 00:11:00,200
It may have escaped
your attention,
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00:11:00,240 --> 00:11:02,400
but high-octane
physical activity
216
00:11:02,440 --> 00:11:05,120
is not my cup of matcha.
217
00:11:05,160 --> 00:11:08,640
Fortunately, though, I have
many other thrilling interests
218
00:11:08,680 --> 00:11:10,720
that I'm eager to share.
219
00:11:10,760 --> 00:11:14,200
Now I'd like to talk to you for
a moment about Japanese poetry.
220
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:17,800
But don't be alarmed, I'm merely
going to talk about the haiku,
221
00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:20,960
a very classical
ancient Japanese form,
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00:11:21,000 --> 00:11:22,400
a very simple form of poetry.
223
00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:25,640
And each haiku
has multiple meanings.
224
00:11:25,680 --> 00:11:29,640
The most widely accepted form
is a line of five syllables,
225
00:11:29,680 --> 00:11:32,840
a line of seven
and then a line of five,
226
00:11:32,880 --> 00:11:35,280
such as, "Fleecy little lamb
227
00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:37,640
"Leaps and bounds
into the spring
228
00:11:37,680 --> 00:11:39,360
I see a jumper."
229
00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:41,160
We're going to head off
to a quiet,
230
00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:43,320
sort of snowy knoll somewhere,
231
00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:45,840
and I'm going
to read one to you.
232
00:11:45,880 --> 00:11:47,040
(clears throat)
233
00:11:47,080 --> 00:11:49,280
(speaking Japanese)
234
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:56,600
"When I think of it as my snow
235
00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:58,000
"How light it is
236
00:11:58,040 --> 00:12:00,040
On my bamboo hat."
237
00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:03,680
Nice, isn't it?
238
00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:05,280
Actually, should I try and write
239
00:12:05,320 --> 00:12:07,120
a few haiku of my own
on this trip?
240
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:09,560
Because that would be quite
an interesting challenge.
241
00:12:09,600 --> 00:12:11,600
TOM:
You could even write a haiku
242
00:12:11,640 --> 00:12:13,600
to sum up the entire trip
at the end.
243
00:12:13,640 --> 00:12:15,320
One haiku for the whole thing.
244
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:16,960
Well, that's actually
what haiku are for,
245
00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:18,640
because if they're
written properly,
246
00:12:18,680 --> 00:12:21,480
they're so laden with meaning
that they can explain
247
00:12:21,520 --> 00:12:24,800
the whole human condition in
five, seven and five syllables.
248
00:12:24,840 --> 00:12:26,480
Should be a breeze.
249
00:12:26,520 --> 00:12:29,480
Let's try it. We'll have a few
practice haiku on the way.
250
00:12:29,520 --> 00:12:32,040
(chuckles)
251
00:12:32,080 --> 00:12:34,960
Thank you very much.
That's the end of double poetry.
252
00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:38,400
Haiku scene over.
253
00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:42,880
First city of trip beckons,
named Obihiro.
254
00:12:45,240 --> 00:12:48,640
I say "city,"
but by Japanese standards,
255
00:12:48,680 --> 00:12:53,360
with a piffling 169,000 people,
it's practically a hamlet.
256
00:12:53,400 --> 00:12:57,200
Still, having so far met
mainly dogs,
257
00:12:57,240 --> 00:13:00,840
I'm rather keen
to find the local boozer.
258
00:13:03,960 --> 00:13:05,720
These are yatai.
259
00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:08,200
They're a sort of Japanese
friendship concept, if you like.
260
00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:09,800
Most towns have them.
261
00:13:09,840 --> 00:13:12,400
In warmer towns,
they're usually just a canopy.
262
00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:15,880
Here, in Hokkaido, because
it is cold, they are huts.
263
00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:20,680
And each one of them is
a miniature restaurant and bar,
264
00:13:20,720 --> 00:13:22,920
and you can go there with
your mates or you can go there
265
00:13:22,960 --> 00:13:25,240
as a couple or you can also,
as I'm going to,
266
00:13:25,280 --> 00:13:27,600
go there on your own
because you're lonely,
267
00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,200
maybe a bit depressed.
268
00:13:29,240 --> 00:13:31,560
The people who are in there
will be friendly,
269
00:13:31,600 --> 00:13:33,760
you snuggle up to them.
It's very, very intimate.
270
00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:39,200
So I'm going to try, since we've
just arrived at it... this one.
271
00:13:46,120 --> 00:13:49,400
-PATRONS: Konbanwa.
-May I?
272
00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:52,160
-Excellent.
-(indistinct chatter, laughter)
273
00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:53,760
As with most social gatherings,
274
00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:56,720
my entrance
is met with laughter.
275
00:13:58,680 --> 00:14:01,360
I'm now going to use my very
formal beginner's Japanese
276
00:14:01,400 --> 00:14:02,760
to ask for a beer.
277
00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:04,040
(clears throat)
I say...
278
00:14:05,760 --> 00:14:08,160
ALL:
Onegaishimasu!
279
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:13,640
(speaking Japanese)
280
00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:17,640
-JAMES: Ah, arigato.
-Thank you.
281
00:14:17,680 --> 00:14:19,640
Cheers.
282
00:14:19,680 --> 00:14:21,880
ALL:
Kanpai!
283
00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:30,800
Because I've already exhausted
my Japanese, I'm going to resort
284
00:14:30,840 --> 00:14:32,280
to technology.
285
00:14:32,320 --> 00:14:35,880
Tonight I am very hungry.
286
00:14:35,920 --> 00:14:38,720
(girl over device
speaking Japanese)
287
00:14:38,760 --> 00:14:41,120
-ALL: Oh!
-Okay.
288
00:14:41,160 --> 00:14:44,920
JAMES:
The second stick translates
back into English.
289
00:14:44,960 --> 00:14:46,960
(speaks Japanese)
290
00:14:49,920 --> 00:14:52,920
-Fantastic. How good is that?
-(laughter)
291
00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:55,480
Let's see if this works
back to front, so...
292
00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:59,880
Tonight, I am very hungry.
293
00:14:59,920 --> 00:15:02,520
(girl over device
speaking Japanese)
294
00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:09,960
-"Divorce tonight"?
-(laughter)
295
00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:11,000
What is it?
296
00:15:11,040 --> 00:15:12,880
Technology is rubbish.
297
00:15:12,920 --> 00:15:14,400
(laughter)
298
00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:15,720
Oh, forget those.
299
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:18,640
(girl over device
speaking Japanese)
300
00:15:18,680 --> 00:15:20,680
-Shut up.
-(laughter)
301
00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:26,400
Despite
the communication problems,
302
00:15:26,440 --> 00:15:28,320
we're getting on rather well.
303
00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:33,680
And this tiny, warm restaurant
is a cramped haven,
304
00:15:33,720 --> 00:15:37,160
especially as it tragically
can't fit most of the crew.
305
00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:39,480
-Oh, is it origami?
-WOMAN: Origami.
306
00:15:39,520 --> 00:15:40,840
Oh, origami. Oh, okay, uh...
307
00:15:40,880 --> 00:15:42,760
-Origami, origami.
-Okay.
308
00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:44,880
JAMES:
I'm five and a half
thousand miles
309
00:15:44,920 --> 00:15:48,040
from home,
a stranger in a strange land.
310
00:15:48,080 --> 00:15:50,440
Which way up is it, that way?
311
00:15:50,480 --> 00:15:51,640
No, that way.
312
00:15:51,680 --> 00:15:54,440
(laughter)
313
00:15:54,480 --> 00:15:58,360
But here in the yatai,
I feel among friends.
314
00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:00,760
-(applause, oohing)
-Oh, no, you're too generous.
315
00:16:03,240 --> 00:16:06,160
Obviously, I'm not really alone.
I have my crew and so on.
316
00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:08,160
But if you really were
traveling around,
317
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:10,880
and you were completely
on your own of an evening,
318
00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:13,320
it's so intimate and so close,
319
00:16:13,360 --> 00:16:15,720
that you have to, you have
to talk to the other people
320
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:17,760
and have a nice time.
321
00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:19,760
It's great.
322
00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:21,640
-This is for you.
-WOMAN: Thank you.
323
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:22,960
(cheering)
324
00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:25,440
(laughter)
325
00:16:25,480 --> 00:16:27,640
-Sam, this is for you.
-Oh, great.
326
00:16:27,680 --> 00:16:28,880
Actually, it's James.
327
00:16:30,760 --> 00:16:32,000
I will treasure that.
328
00:16:32,040 --> 00:16:33,400
(laughter)
329
00:16:33,440 --> 00:16:34,840
I didn't realize
I was so funny
330
00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:37,600
until I came to Japan.
331
00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:40,400
(laughter continues)
332
00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:47,360
After my state-of-the-art
translation tech
333
00:16:47,400 --> 00:16:50,680
failed me last night,
I've decided to go analog.
334
00:16:50,720 --> 00:16:53,880
-Just great. Please.
-Thank you, thank you.
335
00:16:53,920 --> 00:16:55,840
Please welcome, now
accompanying me on my voyage,
336
00:16:55,880 --> 00:16:57,240
Masayo.
337
00:16:57,280 --> 00:16:59,080
Good morning, everybody.
338
00:16:59,120 --> 00:17:00,560
This is Masayo-san.
339
00:17:00,600 --> 00:17:01,960
-Konnichiwa.
-Konnichiwa.
340
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:04,240
And she's my guide.
341
00:17:08,080 --> 00:17:10,480
I can only say...
342
00:17:15,520 --> 00:17:17,400
And...
343
00:17:18,800 --> 00:17:19,960
-That's correct?
-Yes. Yes, and...
344
00:17:24,440 --> 00:17:26,920
And I can say "onegaishimas."
345
00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:34,200
So I say...
346
00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:35,640
-(laughs)
-That's it, for a beer.
347
00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:37,920
-Fantastic.
-That's the most
important thing.
348
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:41,000
Masayo wants to show me
another Japanese take
349
00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:43,000
on a traditional
winter activity,
350
00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:45,320
and she seems
like a civilized type,
351
00:17:45,320 --> 00:17:48,640
so it's probably something
like building a snowman.
352
00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:50,720
(shouting)
353
00:17:53,200 --> 00:17:55,560
Oh.
354
00:17:55,560 --> 00:17:57,720
In fact, it's
the world's most regulated
355
00:17:57,760 --> 00:18:00,280
and violent snowball fight.
356
00:18:02,920 --> 00:18:05,800
Apparently, here in Hokkaido,
they've turned snowballs
357
00:18:05,880 --> 00:18:08,160
into a fully-fledged
team sport,
358
00:18:08,200 --> 00:18:10,800
with strictly controlled
snowball sizes,
359
00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:13,040
contact rules,
leagues, uniforms,
360
00:18:13,080 --> 00:18:15,680
-stadiums and referees.
-(whistle blows)
361
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:17,560
The rules-- as I'm sure you'll
want to play along at home--
362
00:18:17,640 --> 00:18:20,920
each seven-player team can use
up to 90 regulation snowballs
363
00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:24,880
per round to hit the other team
or capture their flag.
364
00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:27,000
Oh, I see, the people
at the back roll the snowballs
365
00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:30,480
to the forwards,
we'd probably call them.
366
00:18:30,520 --> 00:18:34,080
-It's best of three, and if
you take a hit, you're out.
-(whistle blows)
367
00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:41,320
Yukigassen means yuki: snow,
gassen: war or fight.
368
00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:43,920
And I'd never heard of it.
Maybe you haven't, either.
369
00:18:43,960 --> 00:18:46,960
But, anyway, can we bring
the teams out, please, coach?
370
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:49,160
(whistle blows)
371
00:18:49,200 --> 00:18:51,560
Shigo!
372
00:18:51,560 --> 00:18:53,560
Shigo. Shigo?
373
00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:55,000
-"Get together."
-"Get together."
374
00:18:57,320 --> 00:18:59,440
(coach speaking Japanese)
375
00:19:01,080 --> 00:19:02,560
JAMES:
But Masayo's surprise
376
00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:04,200
doesn't stop there.
377
00:19:06,560 --> 00:19:09,040
-You want me to play?
-MASAYO: Yes, please.
378
00:19:09,080 --> 00:19:12,320
Please, please enjoy
snow-snowball fighting tonight.
379
00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:14,320
Yeah, I'm sure I'll love it.
380
00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:18,320
(grunts)
381
00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:20,960
MASAYO:
Oh, James, you look so nice.
382
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:23,200
-Do I?
-You look like a sportsman.
383
00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:26,720
-Thank you very much
-You can do that. Okay?
384
00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:28,520
(laughs)
385
00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:31,320
Here's a ball
from the la-- the la...
386
00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:33,680
-It's rea-- it's very hard.
-Very, very hard.
387
00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:35,240
-Very hard.
-Feel that.
388
00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:37,760
-Yeah, it's kind of a ice ball.
-Throw it at me.
389
00:19:37,800 --> 00:19:40,240
-Yeah, It's quite hard.
-(laughs)
390
00:19:41,560 --> 00:19:43,520
It's quite small.
391
00:19:46,440 --> 00:19:48,440
(chuckles)
392
00:19:48,480 --> 00:19:51,080
To make this
even more schoolyard,
393
00:19:51,160 --> 00:19:54,200
we're doing boys
against the girls.
394
00:19:54,240 --> 00:19:57,520
Which probably means we fancy
them, but we're too shy to say.
395
00:19:57,560 --> 00:19:59,680
-(speaks Japanese)
-(whistle blows)
396
00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:03,160
-(man shouts)
-(Masayo laughs)
397
00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:11,080
MASAYO:
Be careful, be careful.
Be careful!
398
00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:12,280
Come on, James!
399
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:15,200
You can throw ball.
400
00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:16,800
MAN:
James, go!
401
00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:19,200
James, go for it!
Go for it!
402
00:20:19,240 --> 00:20:22,200
JAMES:
I'm starting to think Masayo
might be a bit of a sadist.
403
00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:24,760
What are you doing?
It's terrible.
404
00:20:25,800 --> 00:20:27,560
-What are you doing?
-(grunts)
405
00:20:28,440 --> 00:20:30,640
MASAYO:
Don't let me down!
406
00:20:30,680 --> 00:20:32,440
-(whistle blows)
-(Masayo laughs)
407
00:20:32,480 --> 00:20:35,520
JAMES:
I'm hit, which means I'm out.
408
00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:37,560
As one of my teammates
makes very clear.
409
00:20:37,560 --> 00:20:39,520
MASAYO (chuckling):
You're terrible.
410
00:20:39,560 --> 00:20:42,160
-You're terrible.
-(James chuckles)
411
00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:44,280
James! Come on!
412
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:45,800
I d-- I didn't see it coming.
413
00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:49,320
-James, come on.
-Oh, I'm sorry.
414
00:20:49,320 --> 00:20:50,800
-That's your fault.
-I know it's my...
415
00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:53,880
Because of you, your team
lost the first game.
416
00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:57,440
Look, the Japanese way
is to elevate the achievements
417
00:20:57,480 --> 00:20:59,960
of others
while diminishing your own.
418
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:02,040
-I know, but...
-That was a bit rubbish...
419
00:21:02,080 --> 00:21:03,800
-That's your fault.
-It was my fault, yes.
420
00:21:03,880 --> 00:21:06,320
You should not--
should not be coward.
421
00:21:06,400 --> 00:21:07,800
-Okay?
-Not be...?
422
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:09,000
Not be coward.
423
00:21:09,040 --> 00:21:10,720
-Covered?
-Coward.
424
00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:13,280
(chuckles) Sorry, do you mean
"covered" or "coward"?
425
00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:14,880
Coward!
426
00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:16,640
-Coward!
-I mean coward.
427
00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:17,640
Scared.
428
00:21:17,680 --> 00:21:20,040
Yeah. You shouldn't be scared.
429
00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:22,080
I wasn't scared, I'm just
too big, and they could--
430
00:21:22,160 --> 00:21:24,320
I stuck out from behind the...
431
00:21:24,320 --> 00:21:26,280
Don't tell me that excuse.
432
00:21:26,320 --> 00:21:29,000
-Okay.
-The next set you should
do the best.
433
00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:31,880
-Okay, next time
I will do better.
-Okay.
434
00:21:31,920 --> 00:21:34,000
-Please trust me.
-I do.
435
00:21:34,040 --> 00:21:37,560
-Please don't let me down.
-I won't let you down.
436
00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:39,920
That's like my mother telling me
she's disappointed in me.
437
00:21:39,960 --> 00:21:42,560
It's terrible. (sighs)
438
00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:45,320
Right. Stand by.
439
00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:48,240
My team lost the first set,
no small thanks to me.
440
00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:50,720
-So if we lose again,
that's it.
-(whistle blows)
441
00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:53,520
(grunts)
442
00:21:53,560 --> 00:21:55,480
A near miss.
443
00:21:55,520 --> 00:21:57,400
I like to think
that the problem is
444
00:21:57,440 --> 00:21:59,560
that I'm much taller
than the average player,
445
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:02,240
not that I'm a bit fat.
446
00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:03,680
(shouting)
447
00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:05,360
-Oh, I got one!
-MASAYO: Very nice.
448
00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:07,160
-MAN: James, go, go!
-MASAYO: Go, go!
449
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:11,360
Go, go, go, go!
Very nice. Go, go.
450
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:14,680
JAMES:
I fight tooth and nail.
451
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:17,960
But pinned down
and screaming for help...
452
00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:19,840
Where are they?
453
00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:21,800
-MASAYO: James,
be careful, be careful!
-(James grunts)
454
00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:23,160
(chuckles)
455
00:22:23,200 --> 00:22:25,120
-(whistle blows)
-I'm hit again.
456
00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:26,720
(chuckling):
Oh, my. Oh, my.
457
00:22:26,760 --> 00:22:29,640
(laughing)
458
00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:33,480
-(man shouting)
-(whistle blows)
459
00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:35,120
-Finished, finished.
-Who won?
460
00:22:36,720 --> 00:22:38,040
-Did they?
-You lost.
461
00:22:38,080 --> 00:22:39,920
Oh.
462
00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:43,840
Thank you.
Domo arigato.
463
00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:48,080
Well, to be honest, I thought
it might be a bit pony,
464
00:22:48,120 --> 00:22:50,320
but it's actually really good.
465
00:22:50,360 --> 00:22:52,680
It's quite frightening. And it
does make a hell of a racket
466
00:22:52,720 --> 00:22:55,000
when it hits you on the helmet.
(clears throat)
467
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,280
But, um, uh,
468
00:22:56,320 --> 00:22:59,560
Domo arigato gozaimashita.
469
00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:02,080
-Very, very good game.
-(others speak Japanese)
470
00:23:02,120 --> 00:23:06,280
So the red team, the men's team,
lost by one hit.
471
00:23:06,320 --> 00:23:09,240
One person out. That person was
knocked out in the first round,
472
00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:10,880
the only person knocked out
of the men's team
473
00:23:10,920 --> 00:23:13,000
in the first round,
and it was me.
474
00:23:13,040 --> 00:23:16,640
-Yes, it's your fault.
-Okay? It's my fault, yes.
475
00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:20,040
Uh, so I should say to them,
I should say...
476
00:23:20,080 --> 00:23:24,680
-Sumimasen.
-(laughter)
477
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:28,320
Right, then.
Where to next?
478
00:23:28,360 --> 00:23:31,520
Oh. Mmm.
479
00:23:31,560 --> 00:23:32,720
No, not there.
480
00:23:32,760 --> 00:23:35,520
Here.
481
00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:38,480
(gong clangs)
482
00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:42,880
It's the next morning,
and we're up early,
483
00:23:42,920 --> 00:23:45,880
with some big plans
for the day.
484
00:23:45,920 --> 00:23:47,640
Unfortunately...
485
00:23:47,680 --> 00:23:50,640
So, today I've got up at 5:00
486
00:23:50,680 --> 00:23:52,840
to go to some sort of...
487
00:23:52,880 --> 00:23:55,640
exclusively Hokkaido
horse racing event...
488
00:23:57,560 --> 00:23:58,720
...and it's been canceled.
489
00:23:58,760 --> 00:23:59,840
TOM:
So, what do you want to do now?
490
00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:01,920
Can we go inside?
491
00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:03,960
-(laughter)
-JAMES: No.
492
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:05,080
No, you can't.
493
00:24:05,120 --> 00:24:06,760
SEAN:
Is breakfast open yet?
494
00:24:06,800 --> 00:24:10,440
Breakfast is probably not open
for another couple of hours.
495
00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:14,000
-Has anybody seen my hat?
-No. Sorry.
496
00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:16,280
-Does anybody care?
-(woman laughs)
497
00:24:16,320 --> 00:24:18,720
We have to film
something today,
498
00:24:18,760 --> 00:24:21,240
or the knife-edge finances
of the struggling Amazon empire
499
00:24:21,280 --> 00:24:22,720
will tip into the red,
500
00:24:22,760 --> 00:24:25,560
so here's my hotel room.
501
00:24:25,600 --> 00:24:29,120
Ah. Ohayo.
Come in.
502
00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:30,840
I was wanting to talk
to you, actually.
503
00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:33,120
Um, I was going to say that...
504
00:24:33,160 --> 00:24:35,680
hundreds of years ago,
when I was a child in the '70s,
505
00:24:35,720 --> 00:24:37,400
and everybody was basically
a racist, it used to be
506
00:24:37,440 --> 00:24:40,760
considered great fun to laugh
at slightly wonky
507
00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:43,040
Japanese translations
in the instruction books
508
00:24:43,080 --> 00:24:44,800
that came with, you know,
power tools
509
00:24:44,840 --> 00:24:46,640
and the early Japanese cars,
and all that sort of thing.
510
00:24:46,680 --> 00:24:47,920
Bits that said,
"Cement the driver's arm
511
00:24:47,960 --> 00:24:49,240
to the handle," and so on.
512
00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:52,000
But actually the translation
of Japanese into English
513
00:24:52,040 --> 00:24:54,880
often yields
very, very fetching phrases
514
00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:56,880
that are actually much nicer
than the words we really use.
515
00:24:56,920 --> 00:24:59,000
For example, the first time
I came to Japan-- that was
516
00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:02,080
25, 26 years ago--
the little sign
517
00:25:02,120 --> 00:25:04,280
next to the kettle
in the hotel room said
518
00:25:04,320 --> 00:25:07,160
"electricity pot,"
which is a much nicer name
519
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:08,160
for it than kettle.
520
00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:09,600
We often still say that at home,
521
00:25:09,640 --> 00:25:10,720
we say, "I'll fill up
the electricity pot."
522
00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:12,040
Here's another one.
523
00:25:12,080 --> 00:25:14,200
Um, this is a pencil
I bought recently.
524
00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:16,640
It's Japanese, and it's got
all the usual sort of, you know,
525
00:25:16,680 --> 00:25:18,080
pencil rubbish written on it,
526
00:25:18,120 --> 00:25:20,200
but then if you look
at that side, look, it says,
527
00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:23,760
"made by elaborate process."
528
00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:26,080
Now, the original Japanese
probably says something
529
00:25:26,120 --> 00:25:28,880
completely trite,
like "finest quality,"
530
00:25:28,920 --> 00:25:30,760
but once their version
of that is translated,
531
00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:32,480
it says
"made by elaborate process,"
532
00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:35,040
and I like things that
are made by elaborate process.
533
00:25:35,080 --> 00:25:36,320
And here's another one.
534
00:25:36,360 --> 00:25:38,680
If I just put my, um,
what the crew call
535
00:25:38,720 --> 00:25:41,120
my children's TV presenter
specs on.
536
00:25:41,160 --> 00:25:44,880
There was a, a sign in
the bathroom in the last hotel
537
00:25:44,920 --> 00:25:47,600
that we were in, and um,
it was instructions
538
00:25:47,640 --> 00:25:49,600
on how to operate the shower,
and it says:
539
00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:53,840
"Slip knob into bracket
on opposite wall."
540
00:25:53,880 --> 00:25:55,560
No idea what it means, really,
but it's much nicer
541
00:25:55,600 --> 00:25:57,800
than just saying whatever it was
supposed to say.
542
00:25:57,840 --> 00:26:00,320
I just thought I'd mention--
oh, look, there's my hat.
543
00:26:00,360 --> 00:26:03,000
Um, I just thought I'd mention
that, because we can't go
544
00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:04,520
to the racing now,
and I'm sorry about that,
545
00:26:04,560 --> 00:26:06,640
but as
the Japanese proverb says,
546
00:26:06,680 --> 00:26:10,280
"Never try to bite
your own navel."
547
00:26:10,320 --> 00:26:12,240
(Japanese music playing)
548
00:26:15,360 --> 00:26:16,840
JAMES:
Masayo's taken the day off,
549
00:26:16,880 --> 00:26:18,200
but as the snow's stopped,
550
00:26:18,240 --> 00:26:20,000
and the best budget
in the world
551
00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:22,320
doesn't cover
a Japanese minibar,
552
00:26:22,360 --> 00:26:25,160
I've decided to go in search
of a simple snack.
553
00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:28,760
The real problem for me
is the language, because
554
00:26:28,800 --> 00:26:31,240
if I travel to Germany
or France, I can't
555
00:26:31,280 --> 00:26:32,680
really speak
those languages properly,
556
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:34,080
but I can look at the words,
557
00:26:34,120 --> 00:26:36,360
and they make a noise
in my head.
558
00:26:36,400 --> 00:26:38,800
And often their words
are related to our words,
559
00:26:38,840 --> 00:26:41,040
and you can work out
a few basic things.
560
00:26:41,080 --> 00:26:43,520
But in Japanese,
when you look at the signs,
561
00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:45,640
there is no noise in your head.
562
00:26:51,120 --> 00:26:53,280
I know a lot of you
are thinking,
563
00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:54,840
"Oh, James is just being a dork.
564
00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:57,840
It can't really be
that difficult," but it is.
565
00:26:57,880 --> 00:26:59,160
Come and see.
566
00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:05,680
Now, this is the food
ordering machine,
567
00:27:05,720 --> 00:27:08,160
but obviously you can't know
what any of it is,
568
00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:09,480
'cause it's all written
in kanji.
569
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:12,320
And, if you're trying
to play along at home,
570
00:27:12,360 --> 00:27:15,040
know that the numbers and
symbols on the picture board
571
00:27:15,080 --> 00:27:17,520
don't relate to the numbers
and symbols on the machine.
572
00:27:17,560 --> 00:27:20,800
Oh, no, it's different
on there, though, isn't it?
573
00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:25,640
It's none of those...
574
00:27:26,760 --> 00:27:29,400
The numbers are different.
575
00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:31,240
So the colors
will mean something.
576
00:27:31,280 --> 00:27:35,360
I think the orange things
are... hot...
577
00:27:35,400 --> 00:27:37,040
or are they?
578
00:27:37,080 --> 00:27:38,960
Television shows
are often accused
579
00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:42,400
of exaggerating the truth
in the name of entertainment.
580
00:27:42,440 --> 00:27:44,920
This machine genuinely took us
581
00:27:44,960 --> 00:27:47,480
six full minutes to work out.
582
00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:52,400
(server speaking Japanese)
583
00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:02,680
Yes, there you go. Right.
584
00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:15,120
JAMES:
Even after that, I've only
unlocked door number one.
585
00:28:16,760 --> 00:28:17,760
No?
586
00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:25,360
So, just to summarize, I went
to a very complicated machine
587
00:28:25,400 --> 00:28:28,760
to buy some noodles, when
I could have just asked a man,
588
00:28:28,800 --> 00:28:31,000
but I got a ticket from
the machine, which I then had to
589
00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:34,040
give to the man, and he tore it
in half immediately
590
00:28:34,080 --> 00:28:36,240
and sent me over
to the noodle bar,
591
00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:38,440
where I offered the ticket
to the lady,
592
00:28:38,480 --> 00:28:40,200
but she didn't want it.
593
00:28:43,240 --> 00:28:44,840
But three minutes later,
594
00:28:44,880 --> 00:28:47,600
it turned out I had
hit the jackpot after all.
595
00:28:47,640 --> 00:28:51,080
Ah... wow.
Look at that.
596
00:28:51,120 --> 00:28:53,640
And now everything is okay,
597
00:28:53,680 --> 00:28:56,080
because I have
a bowl of noodles.
598
00:28:58,640 --> 00:28:59,960
Mmm.
599
00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:02,960
Japan is famed
for its raw fish,
600
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:06,040
but a bowl of ramen
is what gets things done.
601
00:29:06,080 --> 00:29:09,040
In face-shatteringly freezing
Hokkaido,
602
00:29:09,080 --> 00:29:13,600
it feels like the beans
and sausages of the Orient.
603
00:29:13,640 --> 00:29:16,000
Anyway, I'm delighted to say
that having been
604
00:29:16,040 --> 00:29:18,200
pelted with it and had my face
rubbed in it,
605
00:29:18,240 --> 00:29:21,440
we're leaving
all this snow stuff behind,
606
00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:24,280
and we're heading
for the broad sunlit uplands
607
00:29:24,320 --> 00:29:26,920
of southeastern Hokkaido.
608
00:29:26,960 --> 00:29:30,840
Where the haiku are all about
fresh, dry tarmac.
609
00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:35,200
And where, finally, I'm allowed
to film a proper scene
610
00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:38,080
about people making stuff.
611
00:29:42,600 --> 00:29:44,760
Hidden
in this unassuming building
612
00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:47,400
in the hills of Hokkaido
is a forge
613
00:29:47,440 --> 00:29:50,160
run by a very special man.
614
00:29:50,200 --> 00:29:53,560
We've come here to meet
Korehira Watanabe-san,
615
00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:55,960
and he is one of the last
surviving makers
616
00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:58,880
of samurai swords.
617
00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:02,920
This is going to be excellent.
618
00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:04,160
♪ ♪
619
00:30:04,200 --> 00:30:06,280
(gong clangs)
620
00:30:11,480 --> 00:30:14,880
James-san.
Very nice to meet you.
621
00:30:14,920 --> 00:30:17,880
Anyone who's seen Kill Bill
622
00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:19,960
knows people
will travel the world
623
00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:23,320
to find an elusive
Japanese master swordsmith
624
00:30:23,360 --> 00:30:26,840
so they can hack ninjas
to pieces in style.
625
00:30:26,880 --> 00:30:30,720
Korehira Watanabe has been
honing his craft for 40 years
626
00:30:30,760 --> 00:30:34,640
and is edging ever closer
to the perfect blade.
627
00:30:34,680 --> 00:30:36,720
And what an edge it is.
628
00:30:36,760 --> 00:30:39,360
Oh.
629
00:30:42,760 --> 00:30:44,640
Wow.
630
00:30:44,680 --> 00:30:46,480
That's spectacular.
631
00:30:46,520 --> 00:30:48,000
-May I?
-Okay.
632
00:30:48,040 --> 00:30:50,880
Domo arigato.
633
00:30:50,920 --> 00:30:53,600
Oh, that is achingly gorgeous.
Look at that.
634
00:30:53,640 --> 00:30:54,720
-Oh...
-No?
635
00:30:55,720 --> 00:30:58,640
Okay. Okay.
(laughs)
636
00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:03,560
That feels fantastic
in your hand as well.
637
00:31:03,600 --> 00:31:05,560
That's proper craftsmanship.
There's a lot...
638
00:31:05,600 --> 00:31:07,880
"Craft" is a fantastically
abused word.
639
00:31:07,920 --> 00:31:09,960
It's used by people who,
you know,
640
00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:13,160
make wooden boxes
on a band saw, but that is...
641
00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:14,880
it's fantastic.
642
00:31:14,920 --> 00:31:17,640
How long does it take
to make?
643
00:31:19,520 --> 00:31:22,480
How many people
can still do this?
644
00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:29,080
Do you have an apprentice?
645
00:31:30,600 --> 00:31:31,880
Do you want another apprentice?
646
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:33,800
(Watanabe speaking Japanese)
647
00:31:37,080 --> 00:31:39,600
May I be an apprentice
for one day?
648
00:31:42,160 --> 00:31:44,720
-Okay. Domo arigato.
-Hai. Hai.
649
00:31:45,960 --> 00:31:47,160
What do you think?
650
00:31:47,200 --> 00:31:49,560
SEAN:
You look like a sushi chef.
651
00:31:49,600 --> 00:31:51,760
-I don't look like
a sushi chef.
-Yeah, you do.
652
00:31:51,800 --> 00:31:55,320
JAMES:
As I join in the forging
of a new masterpiece,
653
00:31:55,360 --> 00:31:56,960
I'm instructed to follow
654
00:31:57,000 --> 00:31:58,120
the rhythm of the hammers.
655
00:31:58,160 --> 00:32:00,240
One, two, three.
(grunts)
656
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:05,200
Luckily, I have a degree
in music, so this proves easy.
657
00:32:05,240 --> 00:32:09,160
-Ah...
-Oh, no. (chuckles)
658
00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:19,120
(speaks Japanese)
659
00:32:19,160 --> 00:32:21,720
I'm asked to sit out
the rest of the process.
660
00:32:21,760 --> 00:32:23,720
Clearly, I'm too much
of a natural at this,
661
00:32:23,760 --> 00:32:26,960
and he doesn't want to show up
the other apprentice.
662
00:32:35,040 --> 00:32:36,320
WATANABE:
Hai.
663
00:32:43,480 --> 00:32:46,760
Master Watanabe-san
has spent decades
664
00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:50,560
trying to replicate the ancient
Koto samurai swords,
665
00:32:50,600 --> 00:32:52,960
considered the finest
ever made.
666
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:56,040
The rhythm of the hammers
are instructions to one another.
667
00:32:56,080 --> 00:32:58,360
It's fantastic.
668
00:32:58,400 --> 00:33:01,280
Listen to 'em go
ding-ding-chh, ding-ding-chh.
669
00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:03,560
He's telling him
with his hammer taps
670
00:33:03,600 --> 00:33:06,600
how regularly and how hard
to hit the piece of metal.
671
00:33:06,640 --> 00:33:10,240
The metal will be shaped
across many months
672
00:33:10,280 --> 00:33:14,040
in continual pursuit
of this mythical perfection.
673
00:33:14,080 --> 00:33:15,480
Hai.
674
00:33:15,520 --> 00:33:18,680
The samurai believed that
the sword embodied the soul,
675
00:33:18,720 --> 00:33:21,840
and there is
a spiritual reverence here.
676
00:33:21,880 --> 00:33:23,680
This ancient process
of sword-making
677
00:33:23,720 --> 00:33:25,560
is actually part
of the Shinto religion.
678
00:33:25,600 --> 00:33:28,880
It's a-- it's a ritual event, as
well as a manufacturing event.
679
00:33:28,920 --> 00:33:30,400
Then, hence this.
680
00:33:30,440 --> 00:33:31,640
I don't know
their exact meaning,
681
00:33:31,680 --> 00:33:33,360
but this is all part of...
682
00:33:33,400 --> 00:33:37,160
These are all votive things
to the gods around the forge.
683
00:33:38,800 --> 00:33:40,760
Where applied,
this layer of clay
684
00:33:40,800 --> 00:33:44,720
makes the steel cool
at a different rate,
685
00:33:44,760 --> 00:33:46,040
changing its characteristics,
686
00:33:46,080 --> 00:33:48,920
as well as providing
that signature curve.
687
00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:52,360
After all these processes,
you end up with a blade
688
00:33:52,400 --> 00:33:56,040
that has a different
quality of steel here,
689
00:33:56,080 --> 00:33:58,400
from here, from the very edge.
690
00:33:58,440 --> 00:34:01,200
The edge is very hard and can
be made very-- very sharp.
691
00:34:01,240 --> 00:34:02,760
The middle is slightly
more ductile,
692
00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:04,640
so the sword won't break.
693
00:34:04,680 --> 00:34:06,640
The edge here is thicker,
694
00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:08,680
so that the thing isn't wobbly.
695
00:34:08,720 --> 00:34:11,160
And all the steel
that you start with
696
00:34:11,200 --> 00:34:12,440
is all still in the blade.
697
00:34:12,480 --> 00:34:14,160
Nothing is ground or cut away.
698
00:34:14,160 --> 00:34:17,840
It's all hammered into that.
699
00:34:17,880 --> 00:34:21,160
It's-- it's breathtaking,
really.
700
00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:24,680
Luckily, Watanabe-san
has a work-in-progress sword
701
00:34:24,760 --> 00:34:27,160
that's a few months
further down the line.
702
00:34:27,160 --> 00:34:30,760
And he lets me take it
for a little test drive.
703
00:34:30,800 --> 00:34:32,480
Hai!
704
00:34:32,520 --> 00:34:34,280
(all exclaim)
705
00:34:34,320 --> 00:34:37,040
How far did I go in there?
Two inches?
706
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:40,400
And it's perfectly okay.
It's not even notched.
707
00:34:40,440 --> 00:34:43,640
The blade is absolutely fine.
708
00:34:43,680 --> 00:34:46,280
♪ ♪
709
00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:51,880
Domo arigato gozaimashita.
710
00:34:51,920 --> 00:34:53,160
Arigato gozaimashita.
711
00:34:53,160 --> 00:34:54,640
Arigato.
712
00:34:57,360 --> 00:34:59,520
I would quite happily
have spent the next ten years
713
00:34:59,560 --> 00:35:01,600
being Watanabe-san's
apprentice,
714
00:35:01,640 --> 00:35:03,880
but I think the crew would have
thrown me into the forge.
715
00:35:03,920 --> 00:35:06,520
Plus, his current apprentice
was sharpening a blade
716
00:35:06,560 --> 00:35:08,080
and looking at me funny.
717
00:35:08,120 --> 00:35:09,760
Time to move on.
718
00:35:11,760 --> 00:35:14,160
After all this wilderness,
it's high time to head
719
00:35:14,160 --> 00:35:16,920
to Hokkaido's biggest city,
Sapporo,
720
00:35:16,960 --> 00:35:18,960
named after the beer.
721
00:35:19,000 --> 00:35:21,480
Now, this is Sapporo, and I have
to say I'm quite relieved,
722
00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:24,600
because my one criticism
of Hokkaido is that
723
00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:25,960
it does feel a bit deserted.
724
00:35:26,000 --> 00:35:27,560
Everything is a bit empty.
725
00:35:27,600 --> 00:35:31,840
But this is the fifth-biggest
city in Japan.
726
00:35:33,640 --> 00:35:36,440
♪ ♪
727
00:35:36,480 --> 00:35:38,800
Sapporo, along with Asahi,
Kirin and Suntory,
728
00:35:38,840 --> 00:35:42,960
makes up the foaming head
of Japan's beer industry,
729
00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:46,520
and its presence
dominates the city.
730
00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:48,840
But my director thought
I'd prefer
731
00:35:48,880 --> 00:35:51,680
the more intimate setting
of the Sun and Moon,
732
00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:54,280
one of the growing number
of microbreweries
733
00:35:54,320 --> 00:35:56,320
setting up in the city.
734
00:35:56,360 --> 00:35:58,600
He was wrong.
735
00:35:58,640 --> 00:36:02,400
The issue I have...
is that most microbreweries
736
00:36:02,440 --> 00:36:07,160
in Britain or America
are a bit... crap.
737
00:36:07,160 --> 00:36:09,640
Everybody's going on about,
"Oh, it's 'craft' beer."
738
00:36:09,640 --> 00:36:11,440
But there's a reason why
Sean, the cameraman,
739
00:36:11,480 --> 00:36:13,440
isn't using a "craft" camera.
740
00:36:13,480 --> 00:36:16,640
♪ ♪
741
00:36:16,680 --> 00:36:18,960
-So, you call this a bitter?
-Bitter, yes.
742
00:36:19,000 --> 00:36:20,560
It's very pale.
It's like a pale ale.
743
00:36:20,600 --> 00:36:22,480
-India pale ale.
-Oh, it is a pa--
India pale ale?
744
00:36:22,520 --> 00:36:23,960
-Yes.
-Yeah. Okay.
745
00:36:29,680 --> 00:36:31,360
Smooth.
746
00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:33,360
♪ ♪
747
00:36:33,400 --> 00:36:36,120
That's refreshing
in so many ways.
748
00:36:36,160 --> 00:36:38,160
It's a beer,
which is refreshing.
749
00:36:38,160 --> 00:36:41,480
It's a good microbrewery,
which is also refreshing.
750
00:36:43,080 --> 00:36:44,760
Mmm.
751
00:36:44,800 --> 00:36:46,080
Very nice.
752
00:36:46,120 --> 00:36:47,880
-Thank you.
-Very nice.
753
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:51,400
Moriya-san, the owner
of the microbrewery,
754
00:36:51,440 --> 00:36:54,360
has agreed to give me a guided
tour of the whole operation,
755
00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:56,640
which amounts to a closet
behind the bar.
756
00:36:56,680 --> 00:36:57,920
(James laughs)
757
00:36:57,960 --> 00:36:59,200
It's very steamy in here,
obviously,
758
00:36:59,280 --> 00:37:00,560
which is a problem
with the camera.
759
00:37:00,600 --> 00:37:04,640
This is a genuine microbrewery,
even by microbrewery standards.
760
00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:06,960
Sorry, I'll wipe it
and then speak.
761
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:09,080
While our Aussie cameraman
steam-proofs his kit,
762
00:37:09,120 --> 00:37:11,280
I add some hops.
763
00:37:11,320 --> 00:37:12,520
Hang on a minute.
764
00:37:12,560 --> 00:37:13,640
-Clear?
-Yes.
765
00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:17,440
Go, go, go. Okay.
766
00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:19,400
Perfect.
767
00:37:19,440 --> 00:37:21,520
Whoa, you can smell it.
(sniffs)
768
00:37:21,560 --> 00:37:23,160
The smell of hops.
769
00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:25,160
It's the beginnings of beer.
770
00:37:25,200 --> 00:37:27,960
It is remarkably hot in here.
771
00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:29,800
I hope my beer's still cold.
772
00:37:33,520 --> 00:37:34,920
It's weird, this, isn't it?
773
00:37:34,960 --> 00:37:37,560
If you went to a-a restaurant,
and they said,
774
00:37:37,600 --> 00:37:39,000
"Yeah, of course you can have
egg and chips,
775
00:37:39,040 --> 00:37:41,000
but you've got to help us cook
it," you'd be really annoyed.
776
00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:42,440
But if you have to help
make the beer,
777
00:37:42,480 --> 00:37:43,920
you don't mind, somehow.
778
00:37:46,840 --> 00:37:48,960
(clears throat)
779
00:37:52,040 --> 00:37:53,560
Excellent.
780
00:37:57,760 --> 00:37:59,760
That has gone down
since I left it.
781
00:37:59,800 --> 00:38:01,800
Um...
782
00:38:04,640 --> 00:38:06,160
(chuckles):
All right.
783
00:38:06,160 --> 00:38:08,640
This obviously isn't the beer
I've just helped to make,
784
00:38:08,680 --> 00:38:11,160
but I am brewing
a plan for that.
785
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:15,160
Um, when will this beer
be ready?
786
00:38:15,200 --> 00:38:17,080
-One month.
-One month?
787
00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:18,840
Where will we be in a month?
788
00:38:18,880 --> 00:38:21,440
-TOM: Uh, Osaka.
-Osaka?
789
00:38:21,480 --> 00:38:23,560
I should point out that
one of the problems we've had
790
00:38:23,600 --> 00:38:25,640
with Japanese hotels is
they only have small bars,
791
00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:27,120
and they often close
really early.
792
00:38:27,160 --> 00:38:29,200
Often before we've arrived.
I wonder,
793
00:38:29,280 --> 00:38:31,560
could you send it if--
We will pay, of course.
794
00:38:31,600 --> 00:38:33,160
Could you send beer to Osaka?
795
00:38:33,200 --> 00:38:34,360
-Yes. (laughs)
-Yeah?
796
00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:35,960
In-in bottles, you know,
is fine.
797
00:38:36,000 --> 00:38:38,080
-Yes.
-Yeah. Okay.
798
00:38:38,120 --> 00:38:40,800
I'd love that, if our own beer
followed us across Japan.
799
00:38:40,840 --> 00:38:41,880
Fantastic.
800
00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:44,560
Kanpai.
801
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:51,160
I bloody love beer.
802
00:38:52,280 --> 00:38:54,280
(gong clangs)
803
00:38:57,320 --> 00:38:59,480
(seagulls squawking)
804
00:38:59,520 --> 00:39:02,040
I'm nearing the end
of the first leg of my trip,
805
00:39:02,080 --> 00:39:03,640
but before I cross
to the mainland,
806
00:39:03,680 --> 00:39:06,960
I thought I'd experience
fishing Hokkaido's
807
00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:08,960
bountiful coastal waters,
808
00:39:09,000 --> 00:39:10,960
hence the low-end,
copyright-free
809
00:39:11,000 --> 00:39:12,360
sea shanty music.
810
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:14,080
Good morning, viewers.
811
00:39:14,120 --> 00:39:16,760
Today, we are in Otaru, and
for lunch we are having tako--
812
00:39:16,800 --> 00:39:18,360
octopus-- very, very popular.
813
00:39:18,400 --> 00:39:21,560
Japan eats two-thirds
of the world's octopus catch.
814
00:39:21,600 --> 00:39:23,480
But this being television,
before I can eat it,
815
00:39:23,520 --> 00:39:26,800
I have to catch it, so we
are here to meet Narita-san,
816
00:39:26,840 --> 00:39:28,520
who is the skipper
of this fishing boat.
817
00:39:30,680 --> 00:39:32,680
James. How are you?
818
00:39:32,760 --> 00:39:35,680
I have-- this is very correct
Japanese etiquette--
819
00:39:35,760 --> 00:39:37,600
I have my business cards ready.
820
00:39:37,640 --> 00:39:41,800
And... using two hands,
821
00:39:41,840 --> 00:39:43,800
face towards the recipient,
822
00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:46,280
-I present it.
-Ah. Ah.
823
00:39:54,000 --> 00:39:55,400
Make a point of looking at it
824
00:39:55,440 --> 00:39:57,280
even though
you don't understand it.
825
00:39:57,320 --> 00:39:59,520
Oh. Excellent.
826
00:39:59,560 --> 00:40:02,160
Now, there's a bit of a story
behind my business card
827
00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:06,600
because I wrote it as a haiku,
828
00:40:06,640 --> 00:40:10,680
and it says,
or I believed it said:
829
00:40:10,760 --> 00:40:14,960
"My name is James May.
My business card is before you,
830
00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:16,880
as indeed am I."
831
00:40:16,920 --> 00:40:18,360
And then we turned it into kanji
832
00:40:18,400 --> 00:40:20,160
so it looks proper
Japanese haiku and so on,
833
00:40:20,200 --> 00:40:22,880
but then we gave it to one of
our Japanese fixers and said,
834
00:40:22,920 --> 00:40:24,560
"Can you just translate that
back for us
835
00:40:24,600 --> 00:40:27,200
to make sure it's okay,"
and it actually says:
836
00:40:27,280 --> 00:40:30,920
"My name is James May.
Please bear this in mind.
837
00:40:30,960 --> 00:40:33,440
Thank you in advance."
838
00:40:33,480 --> 00:40:35,760
Shall we go?
839
00:40:35,800 --> 00:40:38,840
(laughs) Yes.
840
00:40:38,880 --> 00:40:40,560
-Okay, okay, okay. Okay.
-Yes. Okay. Okay.
841
00:40:40,600 --> 00:40:42,000
(both chuckle)
842
00:40:42,040 --> 00:40:44,760
JAMES:
Yet again,
I'm accidentally hilarious.
843
00:40:49,760 --> 00:40:51,440
♪ ♪
844
00:40:51,480 --> 00:40:54,360
A couple of things you might not
know about the octopus:
845
00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:56,760
it has eight legs--
you probably did know that--
846
00:40:56,800 --> 00:40:59,040
but you might not know
that it has three hearts,
847
00:40:59,080 --> 00:41:01,360
and also that it has more
intelligence in its arms
848
00:41:01,400 --> 00:41:02,600
than in its head.
849
00:41:02,640 --> 00:41:04,000
So it's excellent
at multitasking,
850
00:41:04,040 --> 00:41:06,560
it can be using its arms
to get some food out of rocks
851
00:41:06,600 --> 00:41:07,920
while its head is thinking
852
00:41:07,960 --> 00:41:09,680
what to watch on television
that night.
853
00:41:12,880 --> 00:41:15,280
The only thing that could
go against us here
854
00:41:15,320 --> 00:41:17,640
is that the skipper's
a bit worried about the sea.
855
00:41:17,640 --> 00:41:19,280
They normally go out
at 5:00 in the morning
856
00:41:19,320 --> 00:41:20,880
because that's when
it's very calm.
857
00:41:20,920 --> 00:41:23,160
It's now gone 9:30,
858
00:41:23,160 --> 00:41:26,120
so it could get a little bit
choppy, but let's see.
859
00:41:26,160 --> 00:41:29,880
I'm very confident and this is a
great way of earning your lunch.
860
00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:34,920
Or a great way to revisit it.
Unfortunately,
861
00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:36,840
once we leave
the enclosed harbor,
862
00:41:36,880 --> 00:41:40,040
things get choppier
than a karate tournament.
863
00:41:40,080 --> 00:41:41,800
Half a mile out of the harbor,
864
00:41:41,840 --> 00:41:43,880
it's as choppy as hell.
865
00:41:43,920 --> 00:41:46,840
The cameraman can hard--
well, he's not standing up,
866
00:41:46,880 --> 00:41:49,160
to be honest,
he's kneeling in front of me.
867
00:41:49,200 --> 00:41:51,280
(coughs) I might rephrase that.
868
00:41:51,320 --> 00:41:52,520
(laughter)
869
00:41:54,760 --> 00:41:56,800
Um, I've never been seasick,
870
00:41:56,840 --> 00:41:58,320
I'm very grateful for that,
871
00:41:58,360 --> 00:42:01,320
but some of our crew...
(coughs) do it quite a lot.
872
00:42:01,360 --> 00:42:05,960
Bet they're regretting nicking
my beer in the last scene.
873
00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:08,680
Japan update.
874
00:42:08,760 --> 00:42:11,560
Subject: octopus fishing.
875
00:42:11,600 --> 00:42:14,680
The news is we're about halfway
to where the octopus pots are.
876
00:42:14,760 --> 00:42:16,840
They're dropped in advance
the day before,
877
00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:19,200
but it's too rough,
says Narita-san,
878
00:42:19,280 --> 00:42:20,520
to stop and winch them up.
879
00:42:20,560 --> 00:42:22,560
The risk is that
you break the ropes
880
00:42:22,600 --> 00:42:25,160
and then you lose your
precious octopus pots forever.
881
00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:27,160
I think I've understood that
correctly.
882
00:42:27,200 --> 00:42:29,480
♪ ♪
883
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:39,880
Well, if we were...
certain other
884
00:42:39,920 --> 00:42:42,200
unmentionable TV programs,
we would fake that
885
00:42:42,280 --> 00:42:44,640
and just find an octopus and put
it in the pot, and then pretend,
886
00:42:44,680 --> 00:42:46,080
"Hey, look at the octopus
we've caught."
887
00:42:46,120 --> 00:42:49,440
But we can't really do that,
can we? 'Cause that's not true.
888
00:42:49,480 --> 00:42:52,840
-No. Uh...
-So what do we do?
889
00:42:52,880 --> 00:42:55,320
Well, I've heard that some
people have actually managed
890
00:42:55,360 --> 00:42:56,680
to catch an octopus
this morning,
891
00:42:56,760 --> 00:42:59,160
so we might be able
to buy an octopus
892
00:42:59,200 --> 00:43:02,640
or borrow an octopus
from somebody else?
893
00:43:02,640 --> 00:43:05,000
JAMES:
You know, as long as we can get
to the restaurant and do the,
894
00:43:05,040 --> 00:43:07,400
-"Here's how you
prepare an octopus."
-Yeah.
895
00:43:07,440 --> 00:43:09,520
If somebody here's caught one,
we could do-- we can just revert
896
00:43:09,560 --> 00:43:11,760
to the 1970s and say,
"Here's one we caught earlier."
897
00:43:11,800 --> 00:43:14,600
And here's one
we caught earlier.
898
00:43:17,400 --> 00:43:19,200
What a weird-looking thing.
899
00:43:20,880 --> 00:43:22,320
So I think the deal is,
900
00:43:22,360 --> 00:43:23,640
I'll walk round
to the restaurant,
901
00:43:23,680 --> 00:43:25,440
which is only about
100 meters that way,
902
00:43:25,480 --> 00:43:27,360
and I'll prepare lunch
for the crew.
903
00:43:27,400 --> 00:43:28,760
I was gonna say cook lunch
for the crew;
904
00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:29,960
it won't all be cooked.
905
00:43:30,000 --> 00:43:31,400
Obviously some of it
will be raw.
906
00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:32,640
Does that sound like a deal?
907
00:43:32,680 --> 00:43:35,600
He's quite
a sweet fellow really.
908
00:43:35,640 --> 00:43:38,480
I think I'll call him Bob.
909
00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:40,960
Moments later,
Bob is dismembered by the staff
910
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:44,760
of Narita-san's restaurant
and readied for the deep fryer.
911
00:43:48,080 --> 00:43:51,560
We're going to do
sashimi, tempura,
912
00:43:51,600 --> 00:43:53,960
and a sort of stew,
which isn't called a stew...
913
00:43:54,000 --> 00:43:55,480
shabu-shabu, that's it.
914
00:43:59,240 --> 00:44:03,560
I bet that's nothing like
as easy as it looks.
915
00:44:03,600 --> 00:44:07,480
This knife is absolutely
phenomenally sharp.
916
00:44:07,520 --> 00:44:09,720
It's all happening in a very
Zen-like, peaceful way.
917
00:44:09,760 --> 00:44:11,280
It's not like Jamie Oliver
918
00:44:11,320 --> 00:44:13,160
and-and Gordon Ramsay
where they run around
919
00:44:13,200 --> 00:44:15,840
shouting at everybody.
No, this is, this is calm.
920
00:44:15,880 --> 00:44:17,040
It's...
921
00:44:17,080 --> 00:44:18,520
James, I'm so hungry.
922
00:44:18,560 --> 00:44:19,960
-Hurry up, please.
-JAMES: Yes, all right.
923
00:44:20,000 --> 00:44:21,040
(laughs)
924
00:44:21,080 --> 00:44:23,200
It'll be better
because you've waited for it.
925
00:44:26,360 --> 00:44:27,920
Who needs MasterChef?
926
00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:30,280
Octopus sashimi, tempura,
927
00:44:30,320 --> 00:44:34,280
and shabu-shabu, a broth into
which you dip raw ingredients.
928
00:44:34,320 --> 00:44:38,320
A feast to mollify
even the harshest critic.
929
00:44:46,720 --> 00:44:50,800
-Very good. Very delicious.
-Very good.
930
00:44:50,840 --> 00:44:52,640
The trouble is,
the Japanese are so polite
931
00:44:52,680 --> 00:44:55,080
that if it tasted like
shabu-shabu wellington boot,
932
00:44:55,120 --> 00:44:57,280
they'd still say,
"Oh, yes, it's very nice."
933
00:44:57,320 --> 00:44:58,840
Is it really very nice?
934
00:44:58,880 --> 00:45:01,520
-Really very nice. Mm, mm, mm.
-Really very nice, okay.
935
00:45:03,160 --> 00:45:05,160
(seagulls squawking)
936
00:45:05,200 --> 00:45:07,400
-So...
-(chuckles) Yes?
937
00:45:07,440 --> 00:45:09,280
So I have two sorts
of ice creams,
938
00:45:09,320 --> 00:45:11,200
-so which would you like, James?
-Yes.
939
00:45:11,240 --> 00:45:13,600
Well, I'm guessing
from your body language
940
00:45:13,640 --> 00:45:16,720
you want me to take
the black, gray-colored one.
941
00:45:16,760 --> 00:45:19,080
-Yes, this is for you.
-Thank you. I thought so.
942
00:45:19,120 --> 00:45:21,160
-Thank you very much.
-Do you know what's in it?
943
00:45:21,200 --> 00:45:23,200
-Coal?
-Huh?
944
00:45:23,240 --> 00:45:25,520
No, I'm gonna guess...
something--
945
00:45:25,560 --> 00:45:27,440
some sort of chocolate or...
946
00:45:27,480 --> 00:45:29,840
-tea, actually, maybe it's tea.
-No, no, no, no.
947
00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:32,440
-I'll try it.
-No. You try?
948
00:45:34,480 --> 00:45:36,480
Actually tastes slightly fishy.
949
00:45:36,520 --> 00:45:38,600
-Really?
-Yeah.
950
00:45:38,640 --> 00:45:42,120
Exactly. It's squid ink.
951
00:45:42,160 --> 00:45:44,560
-Is it?
-Yes.
952
00:45:44,600 --> 00:45:46,320
Is that vanilla?
953
00:45:46,360 --> 00:45:48,880
-It's sea urchin.
-Is it?
954
00:45:48,920 --> 00:45:51,200
I love it. It's very creamy.
I love it.
955
00:45:51,240 --> 00:45:54,560
JAMES:
I had hoped for a sweeter end
to my trip through Hokkaido,
956
00:45:54,600 --> 00:45:56,160
but I'll settle for this.
957
00:45:56,200 --> 00:45:58,040
Now where do I get
a crab stick flake?
958
00:45:58,080 --> 00:46:00,160
-Mm-hmm.
-It's 90% ice cream.
959
00:46:00,200 --> 00:46:04,320
-Mm.
-Ten percent fish fingers.
960
00:46:04,360 --> 00:46:07,360
So far on my Japanese journey,
961
00:46:07,400 --> 00:46:09,160
I've brought great shame
to the world of dogsledding...
962
00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:11,000
(shouts)
963
00:46:11,040 --> 00:46:13,360
-...shame to my
snowballing team...
-(grunts)
964
00:46:13,400 --> 00:46:15,880
...shame to an
ancient sword master...
965
00:46:15,920 --> 00:46:18,120
-(shouts)
-Whoa!
966
00:46:18,160 --> 00:46:20,840
...and worn a mask in a scene
we didn't end up using.
967
00:46:20,880 --> 00:46:22,600
That was actually
quite painful to start with,
968
00:46:22,640 --> 00:46:24,440
but by the end,
I was perfectly happy.
969
00:46:24,480 --> 00:46:28,680
And while still undeniably
feeling like an outsider,
970
00:46:28,720 --> 00:46:31,160
the warmth and patience here
is so genuine...
971
00:46:31,200 --> 00:46:33,400
-This is for you.
-Oh, great.
Actually, it's James.
972
00:46:33,440 --> 00:46:35,240
-(laughter)
-Domo arigato.
973
00:46:35,280 --> 00:46:38,760
...that I feel the Japanese
mask of rules and protocols
974
00:46:38,800 --> 00:46:41,080
is slowly slipping.
975
00:46:42,040 --> 00:46:45,120
And as my ferry
gets ready to cast off
976
00:46:45,160 --> 00:46:46,840
for the mainland,
there's just time
977
00:46:46,880 --> 00:46:49,480
for Masayo and me
to have one last...
978
00:46:51,680 --> 00:46:53,520
Konbanwa.
979
00:46:53,560 --> 00:46:55,560
-I have a gift for you.
-Really?
980
00:46:55,600 --> 00:46:57,720
-Yes.
-Thank you very much, James.
981
00:46:57,760 --> 00:46:59,280
I have a gift for you.
982
00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:00,640
-Thank you.
-I hope you like it.
983
00:47:00,680 --> 00:47:02,520
-Please open it.
-Okay.
984
00:47:12,320 --> 00:47:14,720
Be careful,
it's-it's quite fragile.
985
00:47:17,600 --> 00:47:19,400
Just put it on my...
986
00:47:21,080 --> 00:47:22,760
MASAYO:
I'll do this first.
987
00:47:22,800 --> 00:47:24,720
JAMES:
This went on for
a good five minutes,
988
00:47:24,760 --> 00:47:26,120
so we ended up replacing it
989
00:47:26,160 --> 00:47:27,800
with something
that just unfolded.
990
00:47:27,840 --> 00:47:29,720
-Please open it.
-Okay.
991
00:47:29,760 --> 00:47:32,440
Wow. Wonderful.
992
00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:34,640
Very beautiful.
993
00:47:34,680 --> 00:47:36,360
-Ah, yes!
-(chuckles)
994
00:47:36,400 --> 00:47:38,560
Fantastic.
995
00:47:38,600 --> 00:47:41,400
It's a traditional
Japanese happi jacket,
996
00:47:41,440 --> 00:47:43,200
and I'm very happy indeed.
997
00:47:43,240 --> 00:47:46,400
It's great, isn't it?
I like it a lot.
998
00:47:46,440 --> 00:47:48,760
-It's been a pleasure.
Thank you.
-Thank you very much.
999
00:47:48,800 --> 00:47:50,480
Thank you very much.
1000
00:47:56,280 --> 00:47:57,520
JAMES:
Now I'm departing,
1001
00:47:57,560 --> 00:48:00,600
I've written a small haiku
to commemorate the occasion.
1002
00:48:02,800 --> 00:48:05,160
"Springless Hokkaido.
1003
00:48:05,200 --> 00:48:09,720
I'm off to Honshu to pop
my blossom cherry."
1004
00:48:09,760 --> 00:48:11,960
See you next time.
1005
00:48:21,560 --> 00:48:23,280
I'll do this first.
1006
00:48:23,320 --> 00:48:26,680
(both chuckle)
1007
00:48:29,520 --> 00:48:32,840
Oh... Sorry.
1008
00:48:32,880 --> 00:48:37,560
JAMES: Hold it by the edge.
Hold it by the side...
1009
00:48:37,600 --> 00:48:40,400
-Uh-huh.
-...and shake it,
and it will come down.
1010
00:48:46,000 --> 00:48:47,920
Somebody pull it off it.
1011
00:48:47,960 --> 00:48:49,920
(laughter)
1012
00:48:49,960 --> 00:48:53,680
Pull it off it.
1013
00:48:53,720 --> 00:48:55,720
JAMES:
It was a teapot.
75254
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