Original subtitles

URUSEI YATSURA (Those Obnoxious Aliens)

Don't get so fidgety!

You're always looking all overthe place!

Stop looking away from me!

More than anyone else, I...

...love you, love you, love you the best!

...love you, love you, love you!

...love you, love you, love you!

...love you, love you, love you!

On nights when the stars are twinkling...

...I dream all about you.

I love you, but you act like you don't know.

I bet you're crazy for someone else by now!

Ah! Men all have so many loves.

Ah! You're spreading them all over...

...and making me worry!

Don't get so fidgety!

You're always looking all overthe place!

Stop looking away from me!

More than anyone else, I...

...love you the best! Love you the best!

Lum's Education Lecture Course for Boys

Let's see...

My fortune for today is... Wha?

Darling!

What?

I'm really bored! Come on, let's play!

Oh, are you telling your fortune with playing cards?

Oh! Was it a good reading? Hey, show me, show me!

Man, you are so obnoxious...

I'm going out for a while.

Take me with you!

No way!

You're going girl-hunting, aren't you.

Hey, let's you and I go out on a date.

Here!

OK!

So long, Lum!

Don't come following me!

Darling, you!

Oh... this is...

Oh, Lum! I was just looking at Ataru's photo album.

Oh, show me, show me.

This is Darling?

That's right.

"At a booth with an unknown girl..."

"Ate all of it by himself." How cute!

"The embarrassment of 7-5-3 Day..."

You were so young and pretty.

Well, a little.

"I'll never forget this." Father was young, too, wasn't he.

Well...

"Right afterwards, wet his pants."

It is recommended that Java Sparrows be raised from chicks.

Birds raised this way will be well-domesticated...

...and will not escape even when let out of the cage.

If you start with an adult sparrow...

...it will be cautious and not perch on your hand.

There is also a danger of it escaping.

Hey, hey, hey, look! Lum, look at this!

This was taken the day we decided to buy this house.

We were both young then...

This house was pretty, just like me...

See, it's flown away.

"If you start with an adult sparrow...

"...it will be cautious and not perch on your hand.

"There is also a danger of it escaping."

I've got it!

The basic time machine!

I'll go to Darling while he's still a chick...

The time, ten years ago. The place, the vacant lot.

Now let's see...

I'll go from here!

We're all set!

Wha?

Huh? Cherry's still the same as now...

That's strange. I was sure I'd gone to ten years ago.

Ah, Uncle!

Hi.

Did you not go on a trip, after all?

I'll leave for my trip once I finish eating. Do you want some, Sakura?

That's Sakura?

No thanks!

I'll upset my stomach! I can't have the runs lowering my energy.

If you don't eat, your energy won't go up. You are in poor health, after all.

Bye-bye!

Time trip successful! Yay!

For ten years, it hasn't changed much.

That's Darling's elementary school!

He's coming out! I'm so excited!

Huh?

Da... Darling!

I can't tell which one's Darling...

Po, po, po. Pigeon, po, po...

I still haven't been able to memorize it...

Po. Po. Po... Um, um... Do you want beans or not yet?

Let's all be friendly pigeons, po, po. Um, um...

Drip, drip, splash, splash, pigeon, po, po.

Wow! Darling's so cute! I found him! Cute!

Oh yeah!

With this doll, I'll train him... huh?

He's gone already. Oh! Take my eyes off him for even an instant...

Hey, hey...

What?

That kid's been following us for a while now.

Cute!

Don't do it!

Is your house this way, little boy?

No, don't!

Miss...

What is it, little boy?

Now, go home.

Li... Little boy, I... let go of me! Oh, oh, no... No!

See, I told you so! The boy is notorious around here!

His nickname is the snapping- turtle first grader.

"Snapping-turtle?!"

Unless you distract him with something else, he just won't go away.

Thank you very much.

Here, boy, don't you want it?

Yeah.

Here!

Now's our chance!

Thanks!

Huh? They're gone... that's weird.

What are you doing? How pitiful!

Ataru!

Oh... Shinobu!

Shi... nobu?!

Hey, Ataru, let's play house.

Oh, OK!

Huh?

Let's go.

Yep.

Wardrobe... Vanity...

...Bureau... Dear, take off your clothes in here...

OK...

You only have to pretend...

Oh, OK.

Sink, refrigerator, table... Dear, what do you want for dinner tonight?

Instant ramen.

My, your family has poor eating habits...

I'll make you something delicious today, so ask for anything.

OK, then... Well, uh... Cup-O-Noodles.

That's so boring.

OK, I'll make you a hamburger steak!

OK!

Man, even as a little child, Shinobu is already working on Darling!

Here you go, Dear, thank you for waiting.

Here I go!

Just pretend! Just pretend!

Oh, I see... just pretend.

Now I will make some dessert. OK?

OK.

Huh?

Who are you, Miss?

It doesn't matter who I am.

This is our house! No solicitors or insurance salesmen.

She's quick-tempered for a child.

Hey, come play with me!

OK! Let's play!

Dear!

Dear!

Huh?

Dear, here's your dessert! A real candy!

I like you, Shinobu.

If you touch any woman besides me, this is what you'll get.

I'm home!

Oh, you're home early.

Really?

You've been rejected by some girl. You probably came on too strong, eh?

How can you tell?

Oh. Your mother knows everything.

Hmmm... Mysterious...

Well, Lum must have given up and gone back to her UFO.

Huh?

What's this?

Ouch! What the hell's going on?

Now, remember, if you go out with that kind of girl, you'll be unhappy.

Yup.

I'll buy you an ice cream.

Wow! I like you, Miss.

That's the spirit.

Here you are, little boy.

A kiss, too.

Something is weird!

That's... Lum?!

I've seen that kid some- where before...

Miss!

Miss!

What a strange behavior this child is showing!

Do you understand, Darling?

Darling?! Then that's me! What?! Then who am I?

You'll learn with your own body what it means to flirt.

Scientifically, it's called a conditioned reflex.

The dog that was fed when the bell rang...

...even if there was no food, when the bell rang, it would start drooling.

Each time you hold a girl's hand...

...the doll on your back will shock you, and eventually...

...just trying to flirt will cause this reaction automatically.

Nothing beats starting training while they're still chicks.

So that's it. So that is what this is all about!

Me, the innocent and pure child... I won't let her do it!

Darling!

Lum, what are you doing here?

And you, Darling?

I almost drowned in a teacup and when I came to, I was here in the vacant lot.

For you to do such a horrible act to this cute, innocent me...

Take this doll off the child me!

No... I won't!

If you don't listen to me, I'll return and break that teacup. Don't you care?

Then I'll remain here...

...and the Darling ten years from now will be a well-disciplined Darling.

What?

You don't care?

No, but that means you're here...

...so you won't be in the world ten years from now...

If your fickleness is fixed, then I won't be here...

...so I will be in the world ten years from now.

Wha... So, then, that means that the child me...

Anyways, take off the doll! Hey!

A... Ataru, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. There's a good boy.

Yes, good boy, good boy.

I won't take it off!

Hey, ho... hold it!

Hold it! Hey you!

Ataru!

Wha?

Ataru! Ataru!

Shinobu!

Who are you?

You just called me. It's me, Ataru!

Liar!

Here, take a good look at my face.

Hey! That's a cute doll you have.

Ah! Hey, hey, Shinobu, could I borrow your doll for a minute?

No way!

Shinobu!

Hey, give it back!

Just a little while, OK?

No! No!

Shinobu, sorry.

What was that!

Hey, let's play!

Phone number...

Darling!

What persistence!

Hmm... Splendid, if I do say so of myself.

Hang on. I'll save you now.

Lum!

Darling! This time I won't change my mind.

It's OK, Lum. I was mistaken.

After living seventeen years, I doubt my personality would change.

But at this age, it's not too late.

Darling, you understand?

Uh-huh. I beg you. Take good care of me! OK?

I'm happy you understand. I'll work hard for your sake!

Uh, well, then, I'll go on ahead.

OK!

Well, don't overdo it.

Don't worry!

Success!

Shinobu! Where are you going?

My doll was taken away.

Who took your doll? I know! It must be Ataru. It's Ataru, isn't it?

No, it's Ataru, but it wasn't Ataru.

Oh! That's him!

All right! Shinobu, wait here! We'll get it back! All right!

Damn. What's going on? It's not coming off!

Wait a minute!

W... Who are you?

Isn't that Shinobu's doll on your back?

Huh? Hey! Aren't you Megane?

What?

You're Kakugari?! Aha! Chibi! Perm!

Even as little kids, you were all so homely.

Hey, give me back my doll!

Oh, sorry, Shinobu! Just wait a little longer.

Promise you won't go to any other woman's place.

Got it, Miss. OK, I'll go play.

OK, good boy, good boy.

So obedient and cute.

Ummm... girls, girls...

Let's play! Hey!

He's holding hands and nothing's happening...

Wait! That's not my doll! Darling tricked me!

He hasn't learned! He's still doing it!

Darling!

Ah... L... Lum!

How dare you deceive me!

Wait, wait! A... A... Anyways, Lum...

The doll won't come off. Do something!

You just leave it there! For the rest of your life!

Don't say that, please, Lum, please?

I don't care.

Oh! Hold on! Hey, wait up!

At last we too are able to own our own home.

I won't let anyone have it or take it over. Even if I don't pay the loan.

Hey, Darling, why don't we take commemorative photo...

...with our new house in the background.

It's that new house state of mind. Oh, where's Ataru?

Probably playing with Shinobu again.

Oh, excuse me, but would you mind taking a picture of us?

Are you talking to me?

Dear...

Huh? Oh...

Ready...

Hey, please, take the doll off! Lum!

No way!

Lum, hey, come on!

Yo, come on, Lum, please!

What a strange game of tag.

OK, then, I'll take the doll off. Don't move. There!

No! Darling, don't die!

Don't pull! M... My head's coming off!

Darling! I'm relieved.

What awful kids!

Dear, let's not raise our Ataru to become like those kids.

Yes, of course.

'Tis fate.

Darling, aren't you relieved the doll came off?

Uh, yeah. But it seems your chick plan was a failure.

I've halfway given up already. You're tough to the core.

But you were cute when you were a kid.

Oh! Look at this!

What's wrong? Eh?

Your mother said this was a photo from ten years ago. Oh!

Oh, oh!

In order to get the attention of a girl at the florist's...

...Ten and Darling are growing a potted plant.

A flower of love blooms, with their various intentions.

But an unexpected rival appears before them!

We'll see you next time for "From the Gardenia, With Love!"

The instant you pass by a pretty girl, you get all energetic.

You're a troublesome one, my Darling.

You're the most fickle boy in all of space. Do what you like; I'm saying bye-bye.

Though you search all over... forlorn, aren't you, forlorn, aren't you...

...you can't find love... forlorn, aren't you, forlorn, aren't you...

You look like you're shrinking away... forlorn, aren't you, forlorn, aren't you...

Always reeling every which-way; where can love be?

You're the most fickle boy in all of space. Do what you like; I'm saying bye-bye.

Though you search all over... forlorn, aren't you, forlorn, aren't you...

...you can't find love... forlorn, aren't you, forlorn, aren't you...

You look like you're shrinking away... forlorn, aren't you, forlorn, aren't you...

Always reeling every which-way; where can love be?