All language subtitles for Shanghai Noon (2000) 1080p BluRay REMUX AVC [Hindi DDP 2.0 + English DTS-HD MA 5.1] x264 (PiRAMiDHEAD-4kHDHub).srt - eng(4)

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:58,655 --> 00:02:01,538 All Hail the Princess! 2 00:02:44,627 --> 00:02:49,929 Father, this is my husband-to-be? He's a toad. I will not marry him. 3 00:02:50,421 --> 00:02:54,675 If the Emperor likes him so much, let the Emperor marry him. 4 00:02:59,721 --> 00:03:02,808 The princess nodded, and the frog said, 5 00:03:03,308 --> 00:03:07,104 "That which you have promised, you must perform." 6 00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:11,108 Very good. Keep reading. 7 00:03:12,943 --> 00:03:16,321 "So the princess leaned in and kissed the frog, 8 00:03:17,364 --> 00:03:21,159 "but as she did, he became a handsome prince, 9 00:03:21,702 --> 00:03:23,786 "and they rode off to his kingdom, 10 00:03:23,787 --> 00:03:28,625 "where they lived happily ever after." 11 00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:31,837 Happily ever after. 12 00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:35,257 There's no such thing as "happily ever after." 13 00:03:37,092 --> 00:03:39,136 Not for a real princess. 14 00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:43,598 The prince my father wants me to marry will always be a frog. 15 00:03:43,599 --> 00:03:47,227 My offer still stands. I will help you get to America. 16 00:03:47,561 --> 00:03:49,645 - America? - That's very kind. 17 00:03:49,646 --> 00:03:51,523 But we're running out of time. 18 00:03:51,899 --> 00:03:55,026 I know of a ship bound for America, but we must leave tonight. 19 00:03:55,027 --> 00:03:56,945 - Leave tonight? - We must hurry, Princess. 20 00:04:05,829 --> 00:04:07,539 Hurry, Princess. 21 00:04:13,737 --> 00:04:15,000 Princess! 22 00:04:17,131 --> 00:04:18,662 You dare to stop me? 23 00:04:18,687 --> 00:04:20,088 - Your servant dares not! 24 00:04:32,690 --> 00:04:36,423 Two months from today, at 12 noon, 25 00:04:36,448 --> 00:04:40,792 you must bring 100,000 pieces of gold 26 00:04:40,817 --> 00:04:45,911 to the Mission in Carson City, Nevada, 27 00:04:46,702 --> 00:04:49,381 or the Princess will die. 28 00:04:50,804 --> 00:04:52,626 Long live the Emperor! 29 00:04:52,651 --> 00:04:56,263 The Emperor has decreed 30 00:04:56,288 --> 00:05:00,336 that his three bravest Imperial Guards 31 00:05:00,361 --> 00:05:04,454 shall accompany the Royal Interpreter to America 32 00:05:04,479 --> 00:05:09,442 to retrieve Princess Pei Pei. 33 00:05:09,467 --> 00:05:11,436 Mung Goo Hi. 34 00:05:12,663 --> 00:05:14,356 Zhou Hei. 35 00:05:14,647 --> 00:05:16,275 Chow Lu. 36 00:05:17,096 --> 00:05:18,299 Step forward! 37 00:05:36,061 --> 00:05:39,598 Hail the Emperor for his faith in us! 38 00:05:41,119 --> 00:05:43,503 Chon Wang, what do you think you're doing? 39 00:05:44,087 --> 00:05:48,487 It is my fault the Princess got away. And my duty to bing her back. 40 00:05:48,512 --> 00:05:52,269 Out of the question. - Captain... 41 00:05:52,368 --> 00:05:55,413 I am an old man and Wang is my only nephew. 42 00:05:55,438 --> 00:06:01,682 Perhaps you would allow him to accompany me. He will carry the bags. 43 00:06:01,707 --> 00:06:06,533 Very well. Perhaps the foreign devils will rid us of him. 44 00:06:08,087 --> 00:06:10,119 Come with me and swear to this royal task! 45 00:06:45,072 --> 00:06:47,950 Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, that's it. 46 00:06:48,075 --> 00:06:51,410 Okay. Great. Great. Okay. 47 00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:54,248 Come here. Look at this. Spent a lot of time on this. 48 00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:56,500 Now, pay attention, 'cause I don't want any mistakes. 49 00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:59,086 Now, I've calculated the speed of the train and the speed of our horses. 50 00:06:59,294 --> 00:07:01,587 We meet at this vector. The only variable is the wind. 51 00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:03,674 Technically, if you travel over here on the horses... 52 00:07:03,799 --> 00:07:04,883 Is this the train? 53 00:07:17,688 --> 00:07:21,066 All right. We're just gonna wing it, like we always do. 54 00:07:21,191 --> 00:07:23,150 Ride down, jump on the train, 55 00:07:23,151 --> 00:07:25,987 hoorah the money, head back to the cathouse, all right? 56 00:07:25,988 --> 00:07:28,656 - Mmm-hmm. - Let's go. Come on. Move out. Go! 57 00:07:29,867 --> 00:07:32,994 You okay? Nervous? It's all right to be nervous when you're new. 58 00:07:32,995 --> 00:07:35,204 You'll be okay. I'll keep an eye on you. 59 00:07:35,205 --> 00:07:38,292 All you gotta do is follow my lead. All right, look alive, outlaws! 60 00:07:44,673 --> 00:07:48,634 "So the princess leaned in and kissed the frog, 61 00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:52,805 "but as she did, he became a handsome prince, 62 00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:55,349 "and they rode off to his kingdom, 63 00:07:55,350 --> 00:07:58,812 "where they lived happily ever after." 64 00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:12,242 Reach for the sky, ladies and gentlemen! 65 00:08:12,409 --> 00:08:15,036 Touch that gun and I'll blow your goddamn head off! 66 00:08:15,037 --> 00:08:16,370 What are you doin'? No, no. 67 00:08:16,371 --> 00:08:18,164 I sorta like to be the only guy that talks, Wallace. 68 00:08:18,165 --> 00:08:20,500 - All right. I'm sorry. - That's okay. That's okay. Good. 69 00:08:20,501 --> 00:08:23,044 Don't worry. Come on, come on. Big 'Un, let's go. 70 00:08:23,045 --> 00:08:25,254 Why is the new guy talking? Where did you get this guy? 71 00:08:25,255 --> 00:08:28,549 You know I'm the only one who talks. Okay, everybody keep calm. 72 00:08:28,550 --> 00:08:30,760 You think you're gonna shoot me? Is that right? 73 00:08:30,761 --> 00:08:33,554 What you got right in here? Yeah, you got this gun? 74 00:08:33,554 --> 00:08:35,556 You think you're gonna do something with that gun? 75 00:08:35,557 --> 00:08:38,018 Come on, lady bird. You got anything besides yarn? 76 00:08:39,645 --> 00:08:41,645 - You got it out for me! - Hey! 77 00:08:41,647 --> 00:08:44,023 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No. 78 00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:46,567 Come here. Come here. We don't steal from women. 79 00:08:46,568 --> 00:08:49,029 Get over here. Take that side. 80 00:08:50,155 --> 00:08:52,740 Give me your hand. Give me your hand. 81 00:08:52,741 --> 00:08:56,078 I'm so sorry about that. I apologize. 82 00:08:57,496 --> 00:08:58,956 First time you've seen an outlaw? 83 00:09:00,249 --> 00:09:02,709 Scared? Kind of excited, too? 84 00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:05,337 All mixed up? Yeah. 85 00:09:07,464 --> 00:09:10,509 Last train we robbed, we were naked, it was so hot out. 86 00:09:11,260 --> 00:09:12,761 Ooh! That was somethin'. 87 00:09:15,305 --> 00:09:17,099 Yeah, it's got my initials right there. 88 00:09:19,184 --> 00:09:20,811 What are you lookin' at? 89 00:09:23,689 --> 00:09:26,525 Wait! Stop! Where did you get this guy? 90 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:29,777 - Texas. Yeah. - Texas? Are you insane? 91 00:09:29,778 --> 00:09:32,446 Just shoot me now, 'cause I don't understand what we're doing here. 92 00:09:32,447 --> 00:09:36,117 Sir, sir, sir, sir. Come here, come here, come here. Sit down. 93 00:09:36,118 --> 00:09:37,785 - Excuse me. - Sir, sit down. 94 00:09:46,211 --> 00:09:47,628 What happened? 95 00:09:47,629 --> 00:09:50,424 - Wallace, what are you doing? - I'm just wingin' it. 96 00:09:50,799 --> 00:09:53,301 No! That's not how we wing it! 97 00:09:53,302 --> 00:09:56,137 No more winging it! Stop! Come on, Big 'Un. 98 00:09:56,138 --> 00:09:57,722 You've lost your "winging it" privileges. 99 00:09:57,723 --> 00:09:59,057 Damn. 100 00:09:59,308 --> 00:10:00,559 Damn! 101 00:10:11,203 --> 00:10:13,747 Where is my Uncle? 102 00:10:38,621 --> 00:10:43,268 Who killed my uncle? Who did this? 103 00:11:14,049 --> 00:11:16,509 Give me the dynamite. Give me the dynamite. 104 00:11:16,510 --> 00:11:18,928 No, no, no, no. You stay here. You don't get to come. 105 00:11:18,929 --> 00:11:22,641 - Keep an eye on wing nut. - Hey, Blue, looky here! 106 00:11:35,571 --> 00:11:36,655 Okay. 107 00:11:40,117 --> 00:11:41,285 Who killed my uncle? 108 00:11:41,618 --> 00:11:44,496 What in the hell is this, the Orient Express? 109 00:11:46,665 --> 00:11:48,458 - Get him! - Come here! 110 00:12:34,588 --> 00:12:38,132 What? Hey! The safe's getting ready to blow! 111 00:12:38,133 --> 00:12:40,177 Get ready to reap the fruits of our labor. 112 00:13:12,543 --> 00:13:14,253 Move it! Let's go! 113 00:13:15,587 --> 00:13:19,132 Roy, you just blew the shit out of our fruits. 114 00:13:25,514 --> 00:13:27,099 Oh, shit. 115 00:13:33,438 --> 00:13:35,148 We got a Chinaman to catch. 116 00:13:40,112 --> 00:13:42,072 Stop! Stop! 117 00:13:46,118 --> 00:13:48,954 Stop! Stop! Turn around! 118 00:13:50,372 --> 00:13:51,582 Turn around! 119 00:13:56,879 --> 00:13:58,297 What the... 120 00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:02,092 - Who are you? - Hey, Roy! 121 00:14:02,342 --> 00:14:06,470 Don't you worry about a thing! I got you covered! 122 00:14:06,471 --> 00:14:08,556 No! No! 123 00:14:08,557 --> 00:14:10,767 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 124 00:14:16,565 --> 00:14:18,066 Roll, baby, roll! 125 00:14:46,887 --> 00:14:50,807 Reach for the sky, O'Bannon! It's my gang now! 126 00:15:15,207 --> 00:15:17,125 I don't understand. 127 00:15:17,543 --> 00:15:20,379 You said your friend had a large estate. 128 00:15:20,629 --> 00:15:22,089 He does. 129 00:15:22,840 --> 00:15:26,092 - What exactly does he do? - Well, you could say 130 00:15:26,093 --> 00:15:28,094 he's a philanthropist. 131 00:15:28,095 --> 00:15:31,139 He helps Chinese immigrants get back on their feet. 132 00:16:09,595 --> 00:16:12,598 Welcome to America, Princess. 133 00:16:13,974 --> 00:16:15,100 Lo Fong. 134 00:16:17,978 --> 00:16:19,813 Forgive me if I do not bow. 135 00:16:20,147 --> 00:16:23,275 Calvin, this man is a trai... 136 00:16:24,401 --> 00:16:25,860 Traitor. 137 00:16:25,861 --> 00:16:29,114 Why? Because he ran away from the Forbidden City? 138 00:16:39,124 --> 00:16:42,252 Your reward is on the table, Mr. Andrews. 139 00:16:55,599 --> 00:16:58,894 Well, now you're gonna have to double it, or I'm gonna kill her. 140 00:17:02,856 --> 00:17:05,358 One thing about the Chinese, Mr. Andrews... 141 00:17:08,529 --> 00:17:09,905 Aah! 142 00:17:10,739 --> 00:17:13,200 We do not renegotiate. 143 00:17:27,673 --> 00:17:30,509 Whatever you think I'm going to do for you, 144 00:17:32,928 --> 00:17:34,513 you're wrong. 145 00:17:36,014 --> 00:17:38,392 It was just like a nightmare. 146 00:17:38,684 --> 00:17:41,435 You wouldn't believe it if I told you. 147 00:17:41,436 --> 00:17:43,271 My gang left me in the desert. 148 00:17:43,272 --> 00:17:46,525 I felt like all the other cowboys hated my guts. 149 00:17:47,192 --> 00:17:50,611 Everyone was... I just missed you. I missed all of you. 150 00:17:50,612 --> 00:17:53,114 We missed you, too, Roy. 151 00:17:53,115 --> 00:17:55,284 I think it's medication time. 152 00:17:59,663 --> 00:18:01,915 Come here, devil woman. 153 00:18:03,083 --> 00:18:04,710 Oh. Mmm. 154 00:18:05,377 --> 00:18:07,838 Oh! Ooh, that's naughty. 155 00:18:08,380 --> 00:18:11,383 Ohh. Ow, careful. Careful with that. 156 00:18:11,675 --> 00:18:14,010 Ow, ow. Careful. Ow. 157 00:18:14,011 --> 00:18:16,430 Ow. Aah! 158 00:18:23,770 --> 00:18:26,565 Holy crap! The vultures are eating my head! 159 00:18:27,149 --> 00:18:29,234 Aaaah! Aaaah! 160 00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:32,696 Help! Help! My gang buried me! 161 00:18:33,238 --> 00:18:35,073 They left me for dead! 162 00:18:36,116 --> 00:18:37,618 Ooh! Ooh. 163 00:18:38,869 --> 00:18:41,705 Oh, thank heavens. I thought you were a mirage. 164 00:18:42,414 --> 00:18:45,876 - Oh, come on. Water. - You. 165 00:18:50,380 --> 00:18:52,507 - You killed my uncle! - Bull! 166 00:18:52,508 --> 00:18:54,885 That was Wallace all the way. 167 00:18:55,677 --> 00:18:58,721 - He was one of your bandits. - He wasn't part of my gang. 168 00:18:58,722 --> 00:19:02,016 He was a new guy. He's crazy as a road lizard. 169 00:19:02,017 --> 00:19:05,812 - You deserve to die. - Hold on a second. 170 00:19:06,480 --> 00:19:08,731 You know what no one's saying here? 171 00:19:08,732 --> 00:19:11,860 I had a chance to kill you on that train, and I chose not to. 172 00:19:12,903 --> 00:19:14,862 'Cause I'm not a barbarian. 173 00:19:14,863 --> 00:19:18,449 - Hey! Where are you going? - Carson City. 174 00:19:18,450 --> 00:19:22,829 I'm closer to diggin' myself to China than you are to gettin' to Carson City. 175 00:19:23,372 --> 00:19:25,374 - Hey! - Which way? 176 00:19:25,749 --> 00:19:28,752 Hey, that's better. Dig me out and I'll show you. 177 00:19:32,923 --> 00:19:33,966 Which way? 178 00:19:39,137 --> 00:19:41,306 You see the mountains over there? 179 00:19:42,766 --> 00:19:45,018 Carson City is on the other side. 180 00:19:46,895 --> 00:19:50,148 All right, dig me out. I kept my end of the bargain. 181 00:19:51,775 --> 00:19:53,986 Dig me out. 182 00:19:55,445 --> 00:19:56,947 Dig. 183 00:19:58,574 --> 00:20:01,201 Hey! Hey! 184 00:20:02,703 --> 00:20:05,747 - Come on! - Don't talk. Just dig. 185 00:20:09,543 --> 00:20:10,711 Aargh! 186 00:24:48,113 --> 00:24:49,114 Hey! 187 00:25:34,196 --> 00:25:38,539 Haven't I told you not to play on Crow Land? 188 00:25:39,797 --> 00:25:41,304 Sorry, Father. 189 00:25:42,254 --> 00:25:47,798 He defeated six Crow... with his bare hands! 190 00:25:51,197 --> 00:25:53,028 Why is he wearing a dress? 191 00:25:53,053 --> 00:25:54,137 Mmm. 192 00:26:20,205 --> 00:26:23,959 Where is Carson City? 193 00:26:25,934 --> 00:26:30,376 Now he's saying it slower. Like that's going to help. 194 00:26:30,845 --> 00:26:34,040 I still don't know what the hell he's talking about. 195 00:26:34,065 --> 00:26:38,510 Pass him the peace pipe, maybe that will shut him up. 196 00:27:20,469 --> 00:27:22,119 This is some pretty powerful shit. 197 00:29:05,204 --> 00:29:07,164 - How. - How. 198 00:29:09,166 --> 00:29:10,708 - How. - How. 199 00:29:10,709 --> 00:29:14,609 - How. How. How. How. - How. 200 00:29:14,634 --> 00:29:15,885 Daughter. 201 00:29:17,552 --> 00:29:19,483 Husbands like Man-Who-Fights-In-Dress... 202 00:29:20,127 --> 00:29:21,800 don't come along every day. 203 00:29:21,965 --> 00:29:26,101 It's your duty to watch over him. - Yes, Father. 204 00:29:47,396 --> 00:29:49,308 He did not complain last night. 205 00:30:08,676 --> 00:30:11,918 Little Feather, bring the wedding gift. 206 00:30:23,949 --> 00:30:28,906 Don't worry, it could be worse. At least he's not a white guy. 207 00:30:49,641 --> 00:30:52,060 I thought you might be hungry. 208 00:30:57,691 --> 00:30:59,026 You were wrong. 209 00:30:59,776 --> 00:31:02,236 You would find me a much better host 210 00:31:02,237 --> 00:31:05,407 if we could come to some sort of an arrangement. 211 00:31:08,368 --> 00:31:10,078 An arrangement? 212 00:31:10,871 --> 00:31:14,166 Like the one you have with the slaves working on this railroad? 213 00:31:16,168 --> 00:31:18,086 These people are free to leave. 214 00:31:20,672 --> 00:31:22,799 What do you want with me? 215 00:31:24,635 --> 00:31:28,430 Once I have the emperor's gold, my work will be complete. 216 00:31:32,893 --> 00:31:33,977 Princess. 217 00:31:38,524 --> 00:31:40,651 I think it is time for you to be among your people. 218 00:31:48,367 --> 00:31:51,494 They don't look like any Injuns I ever seen, Jedediah. 219 00:31:51,495 --> 00:31:53,496 That's because they're not Injuns, woman! 220 00:31:53,497 --> 00:31:54,581 They're Jews! 221 00:33:18,415 --> 00:33:20,792 You, stay. 222 00:33:50,656 --> 00:33:52,574 Fellas, get a load of this. 223 00:34:02,835 --> 00:34:03,876 How. 224 00:34:18,891 --> 00:34:20,768 Is this Carson City? 225 00:34:22,396 --> 00:34:24,938 No, this ain't Carson City, Chief. 226 00:34:24,940 --> 00:34:28,443 You're gonna have to get your firewater somewhere else. 227 00:35:11,403 --> 00:35:13,655 All right, Roy, ante up. 228 00:35:27,878 --> 00:35:29,588 And stay out! 229 00:35:41,808 --> 00:35:44,186 You bounce back fast, kimosabe. 230 00:35:53,070 --> 00:35:54,071 Ow. 231 00:35:56,114 --> 00:35:58,283 What are you doin' here? I thought you were going to Carson City. 232 00:35:58,909 --> 00:36:01,661 You! You gave me bad directions! 233 00:36:01,662 --> 00:36:03,747 No, I gave you wrong directions. 234 00:36:04,998 --> 00:36:06,375 You want your toothpicks back? 235 00:36:08,794 --> 00:36:10,503 You got a lot of nerve, comin' in here with that... 236 00:36:10,504 --> 00:36:12,047 Give it back to me! 237 00:36:23,141 --> 00:36:24,393 Ain't that somethin'? 238 00:36:28,021 --> 00:36:29,398 Take your hand off me. 239 00:36:38,991 --> 00:36:40,158 - Ohh! - Ohh! 240 00:36:42,536 --> 00:36:44,663 Hey, I just want to go to Carson City! 241 00:37:07,811 --> 00:37:09,396 Whoa, whoa! 242 00:37:19,364 --> 00:37:21,033 You're goin' for a ride! 243 00:37:22,034 --> 00:37:23,202 Aaah! Aaah! 244 00:37:57,194 --> 00:37:58,487 No! 245 00:38:07,204 --> 00:38:08,622 Yes! Yes! 246 00:38:11,792 --> 00:38:13,001 Yes! Yes! 247 00:38:14,586 --> 00:38:15,796 No! No! 248 00:38:17,214 --> 00:38:19,340 Sorry! I'm sorry! 249 00:38:19,341 --> 00:38:20,884 You! 250 00:38:39,152 --> 00:38:42,364 - Who in the hell started this? - The Chinaman. 251 00:38:47,911 --> 00:38:50,705 Let me out! Give me the book back! 252 00:38:50,706 --> 00:38:52,456 I have to go to Carson City 253 00:38:52,457 --> 00:38:53,749 to rescue the princess! 254 00:38:53,750 --> 00:38:56,836 You've got the wrong person! I don't belong here! 255 00:38:56,837 --> 00:38:58,012 Hey! 256 00:38:59,022 --> 00:39:00,214 Keep goin' with the Chinese. 257 00:39:00,215 --> 00:39:02,091 I think that's workin'. They're about to let you out. 258 00:39:02,092 --> 00:39:03,217 Give me the book back! 259 00:39:03,218 --> 00:39:06,012 For cryin' out loud, just give him the book back, please. 260 00:39:06,013 --> 00:39:07,096 If it'll give us some peace and quiet... 261 00:39:07,097 --> 00:39:08,389 - Open it up! - Forget about it. 262 00:39:08,390 --> 00:39:09,724 They're not givin' you the book back. 263 00:39:09,725 --> 00:39:11,559 - Drop the book. - I wasted enough time with you. 264 00:39:11,560 --> 00:39:13,686 What? You've wasted enough time with me? 265 00:39:13,687 --> 00:39:15,104 - What about me? - Give me the book! 266 00:39:15,105 --> 00:39:17,356 - Listen for a second. Stop! - Give me the book! Hey! 267 00:39:17,357 --> 00:39:20,860 Listen! Stop! You're not in the East, okay? 268 00:39:20,861 --> 00:39:24,739 You're not in China. This is the West. The sun doesn't rise here, it sets here, 269 00:39:24,740 --> 00:39:26,407 and you're closer to getting us hung 270 00:39:26,408 --> 00:39:28,619 than you are getting that book back, okay? 271 00:39:30,329 --> 00:39:34,081 Now, just... I like that. 272 00:39:34,082 --> 00:39:36,375 That's what I'm talking about. You're wound so tight. 273 00:39:36,376 --> 00:39:39,253 You're the most irritable guy I've ever been around. Just relax for a second. 274 00:39:39,254 --> 00:39:42,256 Take ten minutes, and then you can go back to screaming, I promise. 275 00:39:42,257 --> 00:39:45,093 I'll join you. Okay, just relax for a second. 276 00:39:47,554 --> 00:39:48,847 Come on, sit down. 277 00:39:51,850 --> 00:39:53,227 Come on. 278 00:39:58,690 --> 00:40:00,234 Just relax. 279 00:40:02,110 --> 00:40:03,320 Is that relaxed? 280 00:40:04,488 --> 00:40:06,657 You look sort of rigid there. 281 00:40:07,783 --> 00:40:10,284 You know what? We got off on the wrong foot. 282 00:40:10,285 --> 00:40:12,412 Let's try to start again. 283 00:40:13,830 --> 00:40:16,457 Man, you sure can fight. 284 00:40:16,458 --> 00:40:19,503 I've never seen anything like that. 285 00:40:20,045 --> 00:40:21,463 It was... 286 00:40:22,089 --> 00:40:23,924 I'm trying to give you a compliment. 287 00:40:24,967 --> 00:40:28,427 You're not still mad about me pointin' you in the wrong direction, are you? 288 00:40:28,428 --> 00:40:32,014 Come on. You gotta be able to laugh at stuff like that. 289 00:40:32,015 --> 00:40:33,391 Like me in the desert. 290 00:40:33,392 --> 00:40:35,685 I don't hold any grudges. I laugh about it. 291 00:40:35,686 --> 00:40:38,980 I'm not angry at you. You just left me there with chopsticks to die. 292 00:40:38,981 --> 00:40:43,443 Roy, all by his lonesome. Just me and the buzzards pickin' at my head. 293 00:40:45,737 --> 00:40:48,532 You're a very silent man, aren't you? 294 00:40:49,366 --> 00:40:51,534 You weren't expecting to see old Roy in that bar, were you? 295 00:40:51,535 --> 00:40:53,662 Be honest. Were you? Huh? 296 00:40:57,708 --> 00:40:59,667 Did you really use those chopsticks? 297 00:40:59,668 --> 00:41:01,211 You better believe it. 298 00:41:03,130 --> 00:41:06,340 Now you laugh. That's funny. I gotta remember that one. 299 00:41:06,341 --> 00:41:08,302 So, who are you? 300 00:41:09,052 --> 00:41:11,972 I'm Imperial Guard to the Emperor of China. 301 00:41:12,848 --> 00:41:14,515 China. 302 00:41:14,516 --> 00:41:19,020 - What's with the book? - The book belongs to Princess Pei Pei. 303 00:41:19,021 --> 00:41:20,897 - Who? - Princess Pei Pei. 304 00:41:20,898 --> 00:41:23,525 She was kidnapped from the Forbidden City. 305 00:41:23,901 --> 00:41:26,903 Forbidden City? I like that, the Forbidden City. 306 00:41:26,904 --> 00:41:31,867 A princess kidnapped. It's so mysterious. Oh, go ahead. 307 00:41:32,242 --> 00:41:34,202 The emperor sent us to get her back. 308 00:41:34,203 --> 00:41:36,537 Us? You mean your friends from the train? 309 00:41:36,538 --> 00:41:38,372 They are also Imperial Guards. 310 00:41:38,373 --> 00:41:41,709 They have four days to bring the gold to Carson City. 311 00:41:41,710 --> 00:41:44,546 - What gold? - The gold for the princess. 312 00:41:47,466 --> 00:41:49,675 The gold... Was the gold on the train? 313 00:41:49,676 --> 00:41:51,220 Yes. 314 00:41:56,141 --> 00:41:57,392 How much gold? 315 00:41:59,228 --> 00:42:00,646 One hundred thousand pieces. 316 00:42:03,565 --> 00:42:06,776 Sir? Sir? Could you get us that book, please? 317 00:42:06,777 --> 00:42:09,111 Sir, there's been a mistake. He has... 318 00:42:09,112 --> 00:42:10,697 Sir... Yeah. 319 00:42:21,375 --> 00:42:24,961 We're gonna get that book, and we're gonna get you out of here. 320 00:42:24,962 --> 00:42:27,880 - You help me escape? - Shh. Yes. 321 00:42:27,881 --> 00:42:30,925 - Why? - Why? I'm gonna tell you why. 322 00:42:30,926 --> 00:42:33,594 Because there are some things in this world that are just wrong, 323 00:42:33,595 --> 00:42:36,639 and stealing a princess is one of them. 324 00:42:36,640 --> 00:42:38,766 Yeah. That's wrong. 325 00:42:38,767 --> 00:42:39,892 I'll tell you another thing. 326 00:42:39,893 --> 00:42:42,103 I feel guilty about leading you up that mountain. 327 00:42:42,104 --> 00:42:44,397 What was I thinking? How much time did we waste there? 328 00:42:44,398 --> 00:42:47,233 That was stupid. It wasn't funny. All right? 329 00:42:47,234 --> 00:42:49,611 Now, sit tight and let me figure this out. 330 00:42:50,863 --> 00:42:53,155 All right, come on, Roy. 331 00:42:53,156 --> 00:42:55,449 Maybe... Maybe I pretend to be sick, 332 00:42:55,450 --> 00:42:57,285 then attack the guards when they come in. 333 00:42:57,286 --> 00:42:59,579 Okay, you mean the sick prisoner routine? 334 00:42:59,580 --> 00:43:01,956 Yeah. Does that still work in China? 335 00:43:01,957 --> 00:43:04,042 'Cause here it's sorta been done to death. 336 00:43:06,712 --> 00:43:09,297 - I have another idea. - No, no, no, no, no. 337 00:43:09,298 --> 00:43:10,381 Here's how you help me. 338 00:43:10,382 --> 00:43:12,800 You stay on your side of the room, let me figure it out over here. 339 00:43:12,801 --> 00:43:14,845 Okay, you play over there. 340 00:43:18,056 --> 00:43:21,267 Think. Think. What do we got here? Oh, yeah. 341 00:43:21,268 --> 00:43:22,811 Okay. 342 00:43:23,729 --> 00:43:26,981 We got wood. We got a wall made out of wood. 343 00:43:26,982 --> 00:43:29,151 That's good. Oh, we got pillows. 344 00:43:31,945 --> 00:43:35,281 We got pillows, sheets. We got the sheets and the mattress. 345 00:43:35,282 --> 00:43:38,951 Okay, let's put it all together. Let's think. Add it up, add it up. 346 00:43:38,952 --> 00:43:41,330 What do we got? What do we got? 347 00:43:44,249 --> 00:43:46,501 What are you doing? Stop! Stop! 348 00:43:46,502 --> 00:43:48,711 - What are you doing? - Shh. 349 00:43:48,712 --> 00:43:52,049 - Hold this for me. - No, no. That's your shirt. You hold it. 350 00:43:58,472 --> 00:44:01,224 I like your energy, but I'm not with you. 351 00:44:01,225 --> 00:44:03,351 When the shirt gets wet, it doesn't break. 352 00:44:03,352 --> 00:44:04,978 I don't know what that means. 353 00:44:05,812 --> 00:44:07,356 And then... 354 00:44:10,776 --> 00:44:14,195 Okay. And then what... Then with the wet shirt, you... 355 00:44:14,196 --> 00:44:16,990 You bend the bars. That's the payoff. 356 00:44:17,658 --> 00:44:19,700 Don't waste my time with stuff like that, okay? 357 00:44:19,701 --> 00:44:22,328 A 2,000-year-old civilization, that's all you can come up with? 358 00:44:22,329 --> 00:44:24,831 Shame on you. Shame on you. 359 00:44:32,965 --> 00:44:36,677 Come on. Stop, please. It's embarrassing. 360 00:44:48,647 --> 00:44:51,691 - See? I told you so. - No, you said, "Wet shirt don't break," 361 00:44:51,692 --> 00:44:53,443 not "Piss shirt bend bar." 362 00:44:55,279 --> 00:44:57,238 - Twist it. - Help. 363 00:44:57,239 --> 00:44:59,867 Okay, there. Get it. There you go. 364 00:45:01,535 --> 00:45:03,911 Just one more. Yeah. 365 00:45:03,912 --> 00:45:06,456 You're as strong as an ox! Go! You can do it! 366 00:45:09,459 --> 00:45:11,879 There, you got it! We're gettin' it! 367 00:45:13,380 --> 00:45:15,590 - Hold it for me. I'll get through. - Okay. 368 00:45:15,591 --> 00:45:18,093 No, no, no. You hold it and I'll go through. 369 00:45:24,391 --> 00:45:27,519 No! Not your hand! Stop. 370 00:45:28,896 --> 00:45:30,938 - Hold it. - Adiós, sucker. 371 00:45:30,939 --> 00:45:34,317 - What? - I'm just kidding. Come on. Go. 372 00:45:34,318 --> 00:45:36,485 I wouldn't leave my old pal there. 373 00:45:36,486 --> 00:45:38,864 Go. Really squeeze. 374 00:45:41,408 --> 00:45:43,452 No, no, no, no. Grab this, grab that. 375 00:45:45,204 --> 00:45:47,289 Work your magic right here. 376 00:45:50,042 --> 00:45:53,085 - Too dry. - What? Juice it up. Juice it up. Go. 377 00:45:53,086 --> 00:45:55,130 I can't! No more! 378 00:45:56,173 --> 00:45:57,925 Ah, damn it. 379 00:45:59,176 --> 00:46:01,720 Come on out, little Roy. Work your magic. 380 00:46:08,352 --> 00:46:10,853 - Hurry up. - I'm trying, I'm trying. 381 00:46:10,854 --> 00:46:13,565 - Stop! Don't look at me. - Relax! 382 00:46:15,526 --> 00:46:17,610 - Relax. It'll come. - Thanks. 383 00:46:17,611 --> 00:46:20,489 - That helps. Yeah. Good. - Is that called relax? 384 00:46:36,046 --> 00:46:37,047 Whoa! 385 00:46:46,807 --> 00:46:49,893 Sheriff! Oh, thank God you're here. Get the guns! 386 00:46:59,278 --> 00:47:01,822 - Get my book! - I got it! 387 00:47:01,989 --> 00:47:03,198 Whoa, whoa. 388 00:47:04,032 --> 00:47:05,533 Oh. Who's the pretty lady? 389 00:47:05,534 --> 00:47:08,202 - That's my wife. - How long you been in this country? 390 00:47:08,203 --> 00:47:10,747 - Four days. - Nice work. 391 00:47:13,834 --> 00:47:15,335 Hello. 392 00:47:16,336 --> 00:47:18,839 Come on. Let's adiós, partner. 393 00:47:19,131 --> 00:47:20,299 Hyah! 394 00:47:25,721 --> 00:47:27,598 Well, best of luck to you. 395 00:47:27,806 --> 00:47:30,726 I guess this is what your people call sayonara. 396 00:47:32,603 --> 00:47:35,189 Looks like Fido's giving you some problems there. 397 00:47:35,439 --> 00:47:37,399 You want me to, uh, give you a hand? 398 00:47:37,608 --> 00:47:40,568 - No, I can do it. - Sure, you can. 399 00:47:40,569 --> 00:47:43,237 How is a greenhorn like you gonna make it to Carson City 400 00:47:43,238 --> 00:47:45,449 and rescue this princess? 401 00:47:47,242 --> 00:47:49,328 Stop, stop, stop, stop. 402 00:47:50,871 --> 00:47:54,124 I can't take it anymore. Watch me do it. 403 00:47:56,627 --> 00:47:59,671 Get it like this and you put it up high. 404 00:48:01,965 --> 00:48:04,676 See? It'll drift back when you're riding. 405 00:48:10,182 --> 00:48:12,225 - All right, I'll do it. - Do what? 406 00:48:12,226 --> 00:48:15,144 Take you to Carson City, help you rescue Princess "Pee Pee." 407 00:48:15,145 --> 00:48:17,939 Pei Pei. You do not care about the princess. 408 00:48:17,940 --> 00:48:20,526 You don't know me very well, do you? 409 00:48:22,986 --> 00:48:24,320 Tell you one thing, 410 00:48:24,321 --> 00:48:27,699 I'd hate to think of an innocent member of Chinese nobility suffering. 411 00:48:28,325 --> 00:48:29,409 Tell you that. 412 00:48:32,162 --> 00:48:35,581 You people believe in karma over there, right? 413 00:48:35,582 --> 00:48:37,333 Well, I've been thinking. 414 00:48:37,334 --> 00:48:40,796 There must be a reason why we keep running into each other. 415 00:48:41,255 --> 00:48:44,716 I've ridden with some terrible men, just people I couldn't trust. 416 00:48:44,925 --> 00:48:46,510 But when I look at you, 417 00:48:46,718 --> 00:48:50,430 there's something different about you, and I can see it. 418 00:48:51,932 --> 00:48:53,308 I can see it in your eyes. 419 00:48:55,936 --> 00:48:58,897 It's what the Indians call Chippichawa. 420 00:48:59,523 --> 00:49:02,316 - What's that? - Chippichawa is nobility. 421 00:49:02,317 --> 00:49:05,445 And you have it in spades. 422 00:49:07,531 --> 00:49:11,326 You've got yourself a partner. This has nothing to do with gold, okay? 423 00:49:12,411 --> 00:49:14,246 Shake on it. 424 00:49:14,913 --> 00:49:16,956 Why you spitting in your hand? 425 00:49:16,957 --> 00:49:19,125 Well, it's customary, to seal the deal. 426 00:49:19,126 --> 00:49:20,794 Come on. Let's go. 427 00:49:27,968 --> 00:49:29,803 This is gonna be a long journey. 428 00:49:34,308 --> 00:49:37,811 You boys take care now, you hear? Shalom. 429 00:49:41,607 --> 00:49:44,775 - Shalom. - Oh. Let's go. 430 00:49:49,281 --> 00:49:51,575 Yee-haw! God damn! 431 00:49:52,159 --> 00:49:55,329 Looks like y'all had a twister touch down in here. 432 00:49:55,579 --> 00:49:58,080 Roy O'Bannon and his partner come through town. 433 00:49:58,081 --> 00:49:59,373 Roy O'Bannon? 434 00:49:59,374 --> 00:50:03,252 Roy O'Bannon ain't got no partner, friend. Roy O'Bannon is dead. 435 00:50:03,253 --> 00:50:04,713 He ain't dead. 436 00:50:05,130 --> 00:50:08,883 He busted out of jail last night with the Shanghai Kid. 437 00:50:08,884 --> 00:50:12,011 Shanghai Kid? Roy got a new gang goin'? 438 00:50:12,012 --> 00:50:15,723 That son of a bitch. That two-timin' son of a bitch! 439 00:50:15,724 --> 00:50:18,727 He double-crossed us with that Chinaman from the damn train! 440 00:50:19,311 --> 00:50:22,396 Just like that. See, at kind of a rakish angle. 441 00:50:22,397 --> 00:50:26,609 - Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. - How do I look? 442 00:50:26,610 --> 00:50:30,155 I think you look great. I think you look like a real cowboy. 443 00:50:30,489 --> 00:50:32,908 Very dapper, red bandana. 444 00:50:33,325 --> 00:50:34,826 Roy O'Bannon. 445 00:50:35,994 --> 00:50:38,955 - My name is Chon Wang. - John Wayne? 446 00:50:38,956 --> 00:50:41,583 Chon Wang. 447 00:50:42,125 --> 00:50:44,377 - That's a terrible cowboy name. - Why? 448 00:50:44,378 --> 00:50:46,712 No, come on, that's not gonna work. That's horrible. 449 00:50:46,713 --> 00:50:50,551 - That's so bad. And so's the ponytail. - No! 450 00:50:54,680 --> 00:50:56,807 It doesn't look that bad, actually. 451 00:50:58,475 --> 00:50:59,893 Never touch my queue. 452 00:51:01,395 --> 00:51:03,771 That killed! Ow. 453 00:51:03,772 --> 00:51:06,607 - We have to go to Carson City. - Okay. 454 00:51:06,608 --> 00:51:08,943 Now, before we go to Carson City, I want to teach you some stuff. 455 00:51:08,944 --> 00:51:10,028 Come on. 456 00:51:12,114 --> 00:51:13,866 You just follow me. 457 00:51:15,033 --> 00:51:17,827 - What's that? - Sensitivity. Increased reflexes. 458 00:51:17,828 --> 00:51:20,830 Now, these are guns. These can be your best friend or worst enemy. 459 00:51:20,831 --> 00:51:23,291 That's a spin in my left hand. That's a spin in my right hand. 460 00:51:23,292 --> 00:51:25,626 That's two spins. Now, here, I'm gonna let you hang onto this. 461 00:51:25,627 --> 00:51:28,963 See? Be careful. Always be ready. Always be ready. 462 00:51:28,964 --> 00:51:31,424 Now, try to exhale for long-range shots, 463 00:51:31,425 --> 00:51:33,467 inhale for short-range. 464 00:51:33,468 --> 00:51:35,469 All right, now cover up your ears, 'cause this could be loud. 465 00:51:35,470 --> 00:51:37,431 Cover up your ears. 466 00:51:51,570 --> 00:51:54,322 I am like a wild horse. You can't tame me. 467 00:51:54,323 --> 00:51:57,784 You put the oats in the pen, though, and I'll come in for a nibble every day. 468 00:52:03,290 --> 00:52:05,166 But if you ever shut that gate, 469 00:52:05,167 --> 00:52:07,085 I'll jump the fence. You'll never see me again. 470 00:52:20,807 --> 00:52:24,352 Thing about your husband, and this is nothing against him, 471 00:52:24,353 --> 00:52:26,479 because I really like him, 472 00:52:26,480 --> 00:52:28,815 he comes from a very male-dominated society. 473 00:52:56,426 --> 00:52:58,553 Let me put it this way, 474 00:52:58,554 --> 00:53:01,014 my horse is definitely not my best friend. 475 00:53:15,320 --> 00:53:17,738 Now, people start looking at you funny, 476 00:53:17,739 --> 00:53:19,949 all you gotta say is, "Howdy, partner." 477 00:53:19,950 --> 00:53:21,033 Howdy, partner? 478 00:53:21,034 --> 00:53:23,160 Faster than that, or people will think you're slow in the head. 479 00:53:23,161 --> 00:53:24,912 - Howdy, partner. - Howdy, partner. 480 00:53:24,913 --> 00:53:28,375 - Just follow my lead. Howdy, partner. - Howdy, partner. 481 00:53:30,794 --> 00:53:33,964 - Howdy, partner. - Just park it right there. 482 00:53:35,174 --> 00:53:36,842 It's not working. 483 00:53:37,342 --> 00:53:41,763 Some people aren't as tolerant as I am. Not very friendly today. 484 00:53:45,434 --> 00:53:48,436 John, what are you... 485 00:53:48,437 --> 00:53:51,898 - John... - Ow. Hurt. 486 00:53:51,899 --> 00:53:53,984 Okay. We gotta work on that. 487 00:53:56,028 --> 00:53:58,154 Here you go, John. Straighten up here. 488 00:53:58,155 --> 00:54:00,281 - Roy, it hurts so bad. - I know, John, 489 00:54:00,282 --> 00:54:02,909 but I'm not gonna walk with you if you walk like that. 490 00:54:02,910 --> 00:54:04,661 I'll be okay. 491 00:54:09,708 --> 00:54:12,753 - Hey, Roy. It's you. - Holy shit! 492 00:54:13,420 --> 00:54:16,297 I'm a wanted man. Look at this! Five hundred bucks! 493 00:54:16,298 --> 00:54:17,549 - That's a lot of money. - Let me see. 494 00:54:18,550 --> 00:54:20,760 - Nice picture. - Careful, careful. 495 00:54:20,761 --> 00:54:23,095 Wow, look at this. Do you know what this means? 496 00:54:23,096 --> 00:54:25,306 - This will drive the girls crazy. - Really? 497 00:54:25,307 --> 00:54:28,351 Yes, really. Come on, let's get a couple more of these. 498 00:54:28,352 --> 00:54:30,478 - It's not bad. - I'm wanted, too! 499 00:54:30,479 --> 00:54:32,397 - What? - This. 500 00:54:34,191 --> 00:54:36,526 Oh, come on. That's not right. 501 00:54:36,527 --> 00:54:38,653 I know. I'm not from Shanghai. 502 00:54:38,654 --> 00:54:40,821 No! $1,000 for a sidekick? 503 00:54:40,822 --> 00:54:43,533 - You gotta be kidding me. - Be careful. 504 00:54:43,534 --> 00:54:45,410 Justice system's all screwed up. 505 00:54:47,538 --> 00:54:49,080 Man can't even ride a horse, 506 00:54:49,081 --> 00:54:51,833 and that's a really cool nickname, Shanghai Kid. 507 00:54:51,834 --> 00:54:54,044 It's like, got a snap to it that... 508 00:54:56,380 --> 00:54:59,716 Uh-oh, trouble. John, come here. Get over here. 509 00:55:01,385 --> 00:55:03,929 Tie 'em up over here, fellas. 510 00:55:04,096 --> 00:55:05,556 Get in here. 511 00:55:09,726 --> 00:55:11,519 - What's going on? - Shh. 512 00:55:11,520 --> 00:55:13,521 Oh. 513 00:55:13,522 --> 00:55:15,274 Howdy, partner. 514 00:55:19,236 --> 00:55:22,363 Oh, my God, it's a posse. They can't be looking for us. 515 00:55:22,364 --> 00:55:25,993 - What's "posse"? - Oh, I think they're passing us by. 516 00:55:27,703 --> 00:55:31,039 It looked like Marshal Nathan Van Cleef, the psychotic killer. 517 00:55:35,460 --> 00:55:39,882 Roy O'Bannon! This is Marshal Nathan Van Cleef. 518 00:55:40,132 --> 00:55:42,425 - Ohh! - We know you're hidin' in there. 519 00:55:42,426 --> 00:55:44,886 Oh, God, it is him. It is him. 520 00:55:44,887 --> 00:55:46,470 Why don't you throw down your six-shooters 521 00:55:46,471 --> 00:55:48,932 and come out with your hands up. 522 00:55:49,808 --> 00:55:52,685 And that goes for the scum you're ridin' with, too. 523 00:55:52,686 --> 00:55:56,063 - He won. - Roy, Roy, it's okay. 524 00:55:56,064 --> 00:55:59,066 No, it's not okay! Stop! You don't know this guy! 525 00:55:59,067 --> 00:56:00,234 Let me talk to them. 526 00:56:00,235 --> 00:56:03,070 Remember, we have to save the princess. 527 00:56:03,071 --> 00:56:04,531 What are you doin'? Stop! 528 00:56:08,619 --> 00:56:11,495 - Go easy, fellas. - Why are they shooting at me? 529 00:56:11,496 --> 00:56:13,664 Oh, yeah? What happened to "Mr. Shanghai Kid"? 530 00:56:13,665 --> 00:56:14,749 "Oh, I'm a wanted man"? 531 00:56:14,750 --> 00:56:16,792 - Why? - 'Cause you're an outlaw. 532 00:56:16,793 --> 00:56:19,712 - I am not an outlaw! - Stop! You're a bad guy! 533 00:56:19,713 --> 00:56:21,340 Look at that poster. What does that say? 534 00:56:22,716 --> 00:56:23,966 Drives girls crazy. 535 00:56:23,967 --> 00:56:26,302 Drives girls crazy? Drives the posse crazy. 536 00:56:26,303 --> 00:56:27,595 Makes them want to hang you, 537 00:56:27,596 --> 00:56:29,389 string you up, because you're a bad guy. 538 00:56:32,184 --> 00:56:36,688 - You got 20 seconds... - Ugh, God! Give us a minute! 539 00:56:36,897 --> 00:56:38,481 Go around back, gentlemen. 540 00:56:38,482 --> 00:56:41,985 Make sure he isn't trying to pull the saddle over our eyes. 541 00:56:42,861 --> 00:56:46,698 Remember, I want the Chinaman alive. 542 00:56:49,159 --> 00:56:50,493 I'm not a bad guy. 543 00:56:50,494 --> 00:56:53,080 You're a bad guy. You're with me, you're a bad guy. 544 00:56:57,251 --> 00:56:58,960 Hey, you put me in this situation! 545 00:56:58,961 --> 00:57:02,004 - I'm the good guy, you're the bad guy! - No! We're both bad guys! 546 00:57:02,005 --> 00:57:04,549 No, only you're the bad guy! You go out there and tell them! 547 00:57:04,550 --> 00:57:06,217 No! I'm not going out there! You go out there! 548 00:57:06,218 --> 00:57:07,845 No, you have to go! 549 00:57:11,223 --> 00:57:14,058 - Did I just do that? - Not bad. 550 00:57:14,059 --> 00:57:18,397 I don't know karate, but I know "crazy," and I will use it. 551 00:57:22,901 --> 00:57:24,862 What the hell is going on in there? 552 00:57:36,748 --> 00:57:38,250 You okay? 553 00:57:40,085 --> 00:57:41,752 You just threw me through a window. 554 00:57:41,753 --> 00:57:42,963 You got that gold? 555 00:57:44,715 --> 00:57:47,425 What? Gold? What gold? 556 00:57:47,426 --> 00:57:49,178 Wrong answer. 557 00:57:49,595 --> 00:57:54,432 Wait. I'm... I'm unarmed. I'm unarmed! 558 00:57:54,433 --> 00:57:56,893 No gun. Hold on, no gun. I don't... 559 00:57:56,894 --> 00:57:59,020 I'm unarmed! You can't shoot an unarmed man. 560 00:57:59,021 --> 00:58:02,523 - Don't worry. I help you. - No, John. No, no. 561 00:58:02,524 --> 00:58:04,902 John! John... 562 00:58:05,319 --> 00:58:07,529 Fight with honor. You will win. 563 00:58:09,031 --> 00:58:10,781 Are you frickin' insane? 564 00:58:10,782 --> 00:58:12,533 Is that what they teach you in Imperial Guard School? 565 00:58:12,534 --> 00:58:14,703 - What... - Pick 'em up. 566 00:58:25,261 --> 00:58:27,048 Well. 567 00:58:27,049 --> 00:58:29,176 If it ain't the Shanghai Kid. 568 00:58:31,303 --> 00:58:33,805 How about we make the Kid dance? 569 00:58:35,015 --> 00:58:37,476 Oh, come on! You can do better than that. 570 00:58:43,148 --> 00:58:45,442 You robbed the wrong train, son. 571 00:58:53,700 --> 00:58:56,954 - Look, Marshal, I think that if... - Just shut up and put on your guns. 572 00:59:04,753 --> 00:59:07,798 This is serious, you know? 573 00:59:08,674 --> 00:59:09,841 We don't come back from this. 574 00:59:09,842 --> 00:59:12,219 That's the general idea. 575 01:00:27,419 --> 01:00:29,755 What the hell you doin'? 576 01:00:34,009 --> 01:00:36,010 Stop procrastinating. Come on. Hurry up, son. 577 01:00:36,011 --> 01:00:39,931 Stop it! I'm not gonna let you cheapen it. All right? 578 01:00:39,932 --> 01:00:42,517 This is a duel. It's a sacred thing. 579 01:00:42,518 --> 01:00:45,437 It's beautiful. It's what separates us from the animals. 580 01:00:45,854 --> 01:00:48,273 - Mmm. - Oh, yeah. 581 01:00:50,901 --> 01:00:54,780 Whew! I do not envy you. You ready? 582 01:00:55,280 --> 01:00:57,573 Why don't you turn and face me like a man? 583 01:00:57,574 --> 01:01:00,786 Why don't you do it your way and I'll do it my way? How about that? 584 01:01:06,792 --> 01:01:08,918 Oh, come on, Roy. You can do it. 585 01:01:08,919 --> 01:01:10,921 Oh, no, you can't. He's gonna kill you. 586 01:01:19,513 --> 01:01:22,890 - One. - He's gonna blow you away. 587 01:01:22,891 --> 01:01:24,810 Come on, Roy. Don't think like that. 588 01:01:30,357 --> 01:01:31,983 Two. 589 01:01:31,984 --> 01:01:34,569 Oh, yeah. Be positive. 590 01:01:34,570 --> 01:01:37,322 Be the bullet. Be the lead bullet. 591 01:01:43,829 --> 01:01:46,080 - I'm about to die. - Three. 592 01:01:46,081 --> 01:01:47,833 Roy! 593 01:01:50,627 --> 01:01:52,171 Duel's off! 594 01:01:55,090 --> 01:01:57,009 Roy! 595 01:01:58,427 --> 01:02:00,136 You blew it, John! 596 01:02:00,137 --> 01:02:02,972 Never interrupt a man in the middle of a duel. 597 01:02:02,973 --> 01:02:07,436 I had him. That's what kills me. I had him! I had him! 598 01:02:14,651 --> 01:02:18,447 Now you know how it feels to haul you around in that sedan chair. 599 01:02:19,865 --> 01:02:21,283 I will never bow to you. 600 01:02:25,370 --> 01:02:27,748 Take a good look at these faces. 601 01:02:29,041 --> 01:02:31,083 If you attempt to escape, 602 01:02:31,084 --> 01:02:34,003 I will kill one worker every hour 603 01:02:34,004 --> 01:02:36,298 until you are found. 604 01:02:42,971 --> 01:02:44,556 Starting with this one. 605 01:02:53,565 --> 01:02:55,567 Do not let him see you suffer. 606 01:02:57,819 --> 01:02:59,863 I know who you are. 607 01:03:02,241 --> 01:03:04,868 Please, tell no one. 608 01:03:08,121 --> 01:03:10,415 You call this a special hideout? 609 01:03:11,917 --> 01:03:13,334 Yes, it is, John. 610 01:03:13,335 --> 01:03:16,087 It's also a good place to gather intelligence, 611 01:03:16,088 --> 01:03:18,130 'cause no one passes through Carson City 612 01:03:18,131 --> 01:03:20,383 without these people hearing about it. 613 01:03:20,384 --> 01:03:22,009 Would you ask them about the princess? 614 01:03:22,010 --> 01:03:23,594 Yes, sir, I will. 615 01:03:23,595 --> 01:03:25,429 And I don't care how ugly it gets. 616 01:03:25,430 --> 01:03:27,306 I'm not gonna rest until I've pumped 617 01:03:27,307 --> 01:03:29,768 everybody in there for information, okay? 618 01:03:32,938 --> 01:03:34,272 - Hi, Roy. - Hello, ladies. 619 01:03:34,273 --> 01:03:35,356 Roy. 620 01:03:35,357 --> 01:03:37,191 Make way for a couple of desperados. 621 01:03:37,192 --> 01:03:39,277 Nice to see you again, Mr. O'Bannon. 622 01:03:39,278 --> 01:03:41,363 - Greetings. Hello. - Roy. 623 01:03:43,282 --> 01:03:46,159 Oh, yeah, we're gonna get some information here. Trust me. 624 01:03:47,661 --> 01:03:49,704 This is not a proper hiding place. 625 01:03:49,705 --> 01:03:52,707 Oh, come on, John. Let's relax for a little bit. 626 01:03:52,708 --> 01:03:55,626 - Here, have a drink. - No. I wanna find the princess. 627 01:03:55,627 --> 01:04:00,382 So do I, but we can't exactly go door to door in Carson City looking for her. 628 01:04:01,008 --> 01:04:03,593 - Don't forget, we're wanted men. - Only because of you. 629 01:04:03,594 --> 01:04:06,471 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everything's my fault. 630 01:04:11,185 --> 01:04:13,936 So, what's the princess like? 631 01:04:13,937 --> 01:04:16,105 John, what's the princess like? Is she pretty? 632 01:04:16,106 --> 01:04:19,609 - Is she a pain in the neck? - You are not fit to talk about her. 633 01:04:19,610 --> 01:04:22,403 John, you better remember where you are. 634 01:04:22,404 --> 01:04:25,740 This is the West. It's not the East. Remember? 635 01:04:25,741 --> 01:04:27,658 And the sun may rise where I come from... 636 01:04:27,659 --> 01:04:29,744 Blah, blah, blah. I know. 637 01:04:29,745 --> 01:04:31,829 Good. You remember. 638 01:04:31,830 --> 01:04:33,748 - Is she single? - What? 639 01:04:33,749 --> 01:04:37,126 Is she single? Is she married? Is she available? 640 01:04:37,127 --> 01:04:40,506 Only to a member of the Imperial family. 641 01:04:42,758 --> 01:04:47,304 Are you a member of the Imperial family? I don't think so. 642 01:04:47,846 --> 01:04:51,475 Was that a joke, John? That was a joke. 643 01:04:51,642 --> 01:04:55,144 John, that was your first joke. We gotta have a toast. Your first joke. 644 01:04:55,145 --> 01:04:56,646 - Yes. - No. 645 01:04:56,647 --> 01:04:59,941 Yes. Come on. Drink. 646 01:04:59,942 --> 01:05:01,693 - Just one. - Okay. 647 01:05:02,402 --> 01:05:04,696 But don't talk about the princess anymore. 648 01:05:04,905 --> 01:05:06,406 Word of honor. 649 01:05:11,161 --> 01:05:13,497 Be fun to play a drinking game. 650 01:05:14,373 --> 01:05:15,831 You know any Chinese drinking games? 651 01:05:15,832 --> 01:05:16,958 No. 652 01:05:16,959 --> 01:05:20,379 Every country has a drinking game. You must know one. 653 01:05:21,547 --> 01:05:22,881 Just one? 654 01:05:43,110 --> 01:05:45,152 -¿Uno más? - Uno... What? 655 01:05:45,153 --> 01:05:46,321 - One more. Uno más. - Okay. 656 01:06:01,295 --> 01:06:02,754 No! I lost? 657 01:06:04,214 --> 01:06:05,257 One more. 658 01:06:11,930 --> 01:06:13,932 Oh, no! Oh, yeah! 659 01:06:15,642 --> 01:06:17,603 I'm so lost, John. 660 01:06:19,521 --> 01:06:21,272 90% of the time, I don't even know 661 01:06:21,273 --> 01:06:23,357 what I'm doin' out here in the West. 662 01:06:23,358 --> 01:06:26,027 Terrible outlaw. 663 01:06:26,028 --> 01:06:29,530 - No, you're a good outlaw. - Stop, please. I'm a screw-up. 664 01:06:29,531 --> 01:06:33,451 - No, I am screw-up. Look at my scar. - No. 665 01:06:33,452 --> 01:06:37,080 One for arriving late at a guard duty. 666 01:06:37,623 --> 01:06:41,209 One for dropping fighting stick. You good. I saw you. 667 01:06:41,210 --> 01:06:42,878 The only thing I'm good at is talking. 668 01:06:46,173 --> 01:06:49,217 - It's true. - John. 669 01:06:49,218 --> 01:06:52,220 - Huh? - Take your hand off me, John. 670 01:06:52,221 --> 01:06:53,388 Oh. 671 01:06:56,767 --> 01:06:58,059 One more game? 672 01:06:58,060 --> 01:07:01,230 No. No more drinking. That's it. 673 01:07:02,314 --> 01:07:06,443 -¿Uno más? - No más, John. No más. 674 01:07:11,156 --> 01:07:12,324 Roy? 675 01:07:13,492 --> 01:07:14,993 Roy? 676 01:07:18,830 --> 01:07:20,999 - Are you coming? - Fifi? 677 01:07:22,584 --> 01:07:23,794 ¿Uno más? 678 01:07:46,316 --> 01:07:49,528 So, who's your funny-looking friend? 679 01:07:50,529 --> 01:07:51,946 I don't know. 680 01:07:51,947 --> 01:07:54,615 He's this crazy Imperial Guard I met. 681 01:07:54,616 --> 01:07:56,702 He's... He's really funny. 682 01:07:58,287 --> 01:07:59,787 The guy's hysterical. 683 01:07:59,788 --> 01:08:02,790 We were just playing... Did you see us? We were just playing that game. 684 01:08:02,791 --> 01:08:05,209 John's going... 685 01:08:05,210 --> 01:08:08,296 And I was going... You can't really understand what he's saying, but... 686 01:08:08,297 --> 01:08:12,634 Roy? Roy? I never figured you for riding with a Chinaman. 687 01:08:15,304 --> 01:08:19,307 Well, I'm not exactly riding with him, Fifi. 688 01:08:19,308 --> 01:08:23,895 He's not my friend, you know. I mean, he's a Chinaman. 689 01:08:25,104 --> 01:08:26,899 Well, that's good. 690 01:08:27,608 --> 01:08:29,526 I mean... And you really... 691 01:08:29,902 --> 01:08:32,819 Were you guys talking about who he was? 692 01:08:32,821 --> 01:08:35,031 Let's talk about something else. 693 01:08:41,330 --> 01:08:43,916 Don't you look delicious? 694 01:08:44,750 --> 01:08:46,751 - What's going on? - Well. 695 01:08:46,752 --> 01:08:49,587 - You! - If it isn't the Shanghai Kid. 696 01:08:54,760 --> 01:08:56,053 Here. 697 01:09:15,863 --> 01:09:17,533 Thank you. 698 01:09:21,161 --> 01:09:22,828 Ahh. Thank you. 699 01:09:23,580 --> 01:09:24,706 ¿Uno más? 700 01:09:28,210 --> 01:09:29,877 John, come on. We gotta get going. 701 01:09:29,877 --> 01:09:32,798 - The marshal's downstairs. - No, no, Marshal's in there. 702 01:09:34,466 --> 01:09:36,466 Oh, man, John. What'd you do to him? 703 01:09:36,468 --> 01:09:38,135 - Come on. Let's get going. - No! 704 01:09:38,136 --> 01:09:39,595 I don't wanna ride with you. 705 01:09:39,595 --> 01:09:42,182 Come on, John. Damn, you're a mean drunk. 706 01:09:43,809 --> 01:09:45,560 - Hi, horsey! - All right. Shh, shh, shh. 707 01:09:46,228 --> 01:09:48,520 - All right, it's time for a "yee-haw." - Yee-what? 708 01:09:48,522 --> 01:09:50,898 Shh, shh, shh. Roy O'Bannon special. 709 01:09:50,899 --> 01:09:53,901 We jump off, land on the back of the horse, yell "yee-haw" 710 01:09:53,902 --> 01:09:56,405 and ride off, all right? 711 01:09:57,155 --> 01:10:00,075 Watch me and do exactly as I do it. Yee-haw! 712 01:10:06,331 --> 01:10:07,833 Yee-haw! 713 01:10:10,043 --> 01:10:12,671 Okay, hyah! Hyah! 714 01:10:12,838 --> 01:10:15,174 - Hyah! Where's the head? - John! 715 01:10:16,383 --> 01:10:17,634 John, get up! 716 01:10:19,094 --> 01:10:20,428 Tie 'em up. 717 01:10:20,429 --> 01:10:23,515 What happened to my horse? Is he dead? 718 01:10:24,099 --> 01:10:25,600 No, but we are, John. 719 01:10:25,601 --> 01:10:28,854 - Hi, horsey. You sleeping? - Get up. 720 01:10:31,440 --> 01:10:32,608 Hmm. 721 01:10:34,401 --> 01:10:37,196 Mighty impressive hardware you're packin'. 722 01:10:38,697 --> 01:10:42,784 Why don't you get your eyes off my package, you twisted son of a bitch. 723 01:10:47,456 --> 01:10:50,375 - I hope that's him leaving. - Your turn. 724 01:10:52,878 --> 01:10:55,171 Thank you, Mr. Van Cleef. 725 01:10:55,172 --> 01:10:58,008 Well, well. What have we here? 726 01:11:00,886 --> 01:11:02,971 Mr. O'Bannon, I presume. 727 01:11:03,555 --> 01:11:06,307 Can I get a drink of water? I got cotton mouth. Aah! 728 01:11:06,308 --> 01:11:08,810 Don't mention it. 729 01:11:10,062 --> 01:11:13,190 And this must be the famous Shanghai Kid. 730 01:11:18,153 --> 01:11:20,696 - Chon Wang? - Lo Fong? 731 01:11:20,697 --> 01:11:22,907 You remember your old comrade-in-arms? 732 01:11:22,908 --> 01:11:24,992 - Hmm? - I remember a traitor. 733 01:11:24,993 --> 01:11:27,161 I'm sensing some bad blood here. 734 01:11:27,162 --> 01:11:31,083 - Where is the gold? - Where's Princess Pei Pei? 735 01:11:31,583 --> 01:11:32,875 Stop. 736 01:11:32,876 --> 01:11:35,044 Come on. We're men. We're not piñatas. 737 01:11:35,045 --> 01:11:38,632 Okay? And we're really hungover. We're not trying to be tough guys. 738 01:11:38,757 --> 01:11:40,716 You wanna talk about the gold, let's talk about the gold. 739 01:11:40,717 --> 01:11:42,218 So, you have my gold? 740 01:11:42,219 --> 01:11:44,596 - Your gold? - Yes, we have the gold. 741 01:11:45,430 --> 01:11:48,308 - Then where is it? - The gold's in a safe place. 742 01:11:51,728 --> 01:11:53,063 Is he telling the truth? 743 01:11:58,861 --> 01:12:00,403 No. 744 01:12:00,404 --> 01:12:01,780 Ow! 745 01:12:02,823 --> 01:12:05,700 Nice, John. Way to go. Way to think on your feet. 746 01:12:05,701 --> 01:12:08,369 He cannot lie. He is bound by Imperial decree. 747 01:12:08,370 --> 01:12:10,538 Imperial decree. 748 01:12:10,539 --> 01:12:11,789 When are you gonna learn 749 01:12:11,790 --> 01:12:13,458 you're not in China anymore? 750 01:12:14,543 --> 01:12:18,130 He will never learn. He can only follow orders. 751 01:12:20,799 --> 01:12:23,886 At least I still have my honor. 752 01:12:30,726 --> 01:12:32,895 Slaves have no honor. 753 01:12:34,188 --> 01:12:35,229 - No! No! - Hey! 754 01:12:40,152 --> 01:12:42,112 Now you can never go back to China. 755 01:12:45,657 --> 01:12:48,994 You blew it. Phew! You blew it, man. 756 01:12:49,661 --> 01:12:52,748 You do not want to cut his hair off, trust me. 757 01:12:53,540 --> 01:12:55,334 Nothing personal, boys. 758 01:12:57,878 --> 01:13:00,087 My loyalty is to the emperor. 759 01:13:00,088 --> 01:13:03,342 Yeah, John, I heard all about the emperor. 760 01:13:04,510 --> 01:13:06,428 Must be a hell of a man. 761 01:13:07,012 --> 01:13:08,931 He's only 12. 762 01:13:10,265 --> 01:13:13,017 Are you kidding me? You're sitting here with a noose around your neck, 763 01:13:13,018 --> 01:13:15,562 ready to die for someone whose balls haven't even dropped? 764 01:13:17,564 --> 01:13:22,026 By virtue of the authority vested in me through the territory of Nevada, 765 01:13:22,027 --> 01:13:25,446 I do hereby order these men to hang by their necks 766 01:13:25,447 --> 01:13:27,366 until their feet quit kicking. 767 01:13:34,289 --> 01:13:36,332 You're goin' to hell, boys, 768 01:13:36,333 --> 01:13:38,710 and your horses are taking you there. 769 01:13:39,002 --> 01:13:40,795 Tighten 'em up. 770 01:13:40,796 --> 01:13:43,339 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 771 01:13:43,340 --> 01:13:47,468 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 772 01:13:47,469 --> 01:13:50,556 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 773 01:13:54,184 --> 01:13:56,143 Hey! Watch it, you little punk. 774 01:13:56,144 --> 01:14:04,026 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 775 01:14:04,027 --> 01:14:05,528 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 776 01:14:05,529 --> 01:14:08,656 Hang 'em! Hang 'em! 777 01:14:14,288 --> 01:14:16,038 John, what are you doing? 778 01:14:16,039 --> 01:14:17,875 Uh... 779 01:14:32,097 --> 01:14:35,267 What the hell is goin' on here? Stop those horses! 780 01:14:35,517 --> 01:14:36,560 Stop them! 781 01:14:43,108 --> 01:14:45,444 Pull it! Pull it! 782 01:14:54,745 --> 01:14:55,954 Help me! 783 01:15:05,839 --> 01:15:08,008 Well, don't just stand there! Go after them! 784 01:15:15,682 --> 01:15:18,059 Will you listen to this creek, John? 785 01:15:18,060 --> 01:15:20,395 I've never noticed what a beautiful melody a creek makes. 786 01:15:22,481 --> 01:15:24,441 I've never taken the damn time. 787 01:15:25,817 --> 01:15:27,818 Look at these mountains and these trees. 788 01:15:27,819 --> 01:15:29,403 Hell, look at these green trees. 789 01:15:29,404 --> 01:15:30,780 Come here. I don't even know the names... 790 01:15:30,781 --> 01:15:33,282 We're gonna learn the names of these green trees. Come here. 791 01:15:33,283 --> 01:15:35,494 I want you to look at these. 792 01:15:36,203 --> 01:15:38,246 Can we not... John, what are you doing? 793 01:15:38,247 --> 01:15:40,581 Are you still worried about your hair? 794 01:15:40,582 --> 01:15:43,668 John, listen to me. You're very vain. 795 01:15:43,669 --> 01:15:46,754 By the time you're 70, your queue, your ponytail, 796 01:15:46,755 --> 01:15:48,840 will be as good as new. 797 01:15:48,841 --> 01:15:51,092 - What are you doing? - I'm leaving. 798 01:15:51,093 --> 01:15:54,095 Can we not take two seconds, John? We just cheated death. 799 01:15:54,096 --> 01:15:57,474 Come on. Let's look at these mountains for a second. 800 01:15:58,350 --> 01:15:59,684 Okay, let me get my stuff. 801 01:15:59,685 --> 01:16:01,687 - God, you're unbelievable. - I'm going alone. 802 01:16:07,860 --> 01:16:11,279 What are you... John, what are you talking about? 803 01:16:11,280 --> 01:16:15,199 - I heard you. - You heard me. Okay. 804 01:16:15,200 --> 01:16:17,035 At Goldie's. 805 01:16:18,370 --> 01:16:20,706 You said I wasn't your friend. 806 01:16:23,458 --> 01:16:25,126 John... 807 01:16:25,127 --> 01:16:28,045 Hold on a second, John. I was talking to a girl. 808 01:16:28,046 --> 01:16:29,964 It was... That's taken out of context. 809 01:16:29,965 --> 01:16:31,465 - That's not... - Roy. 810 01:16:31,466 --> 01:16:35,512 You were right. How could I ever be your friend? 811 01:16:36,013 --> 01:16:37,806 I'm just a Chinaman. 812 01:16:38,891 --> 01:16:41,517 Hold on, John. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it to... 813 01:16:41,518 --> 01:16:43,061 Sayonara, Roy. 814 01:17:38,283 --> 01:17:39,576 Wait here. 815 01:17:52,548 --> 01:17:53,924 Please. 816 01:18:14,820 --> 01:18:16,488 You have come a long way. 817 01:18:17,322 --> 01:18:21,243 I hope the princess you seek is worthy of such devotion. 818 01:18:23,996 --> 01:18:26,832 It is my duty to bring her home. 819 01:18:32,045 --> 01:18:34,423 I even brought her favorite book. 820 01:18:38,510 --> 01:18:40,846 That's very kind of you. 821 01:18:43,348 --> 01:18:45,308 But what if you found the princess 822 01:18:45,309 --> 01:18:48,812 and she did not wish to go back to the Forbidden City? 823 01:18:50,439 --> 01:18:52,482 Why would she want to stay here? 824 01:18:53,275 --> 01:18:55,903 Maybe she can do more for the people here 825 01:18:57,779 --> 01:18:59,990 than she could back in China. 826 01:19:07,581 --> 01:19:08,957 Princess Pei Pei. 827 01:19:13,212 --> 01:19:15,631 Please, don't draw attention. 828 01:19:18,467 --> 01:19:20,468 Please. Stand up! 829 01:19:20,469 --> 01:19:22,470 Princess, you have to come with me. 830 01:19:22,471 --> 01:19:25,891 I cannot. Fong cannot find me missing. 831 01:19:26,350 --> 01:19:28,727 Princess, I cannot leave you here. 832 01:19:34,066 --> 01:19:36,235 Please, stand up! 833 01:19:37,611 --> 01:19:39,738 Don't bow! Get up! 834 01:19:40,989 --> 01:19:42,407 Get up! 835 01:19:43,742 --> 01:19:45,327 You must go. 836 01:19:45,994 --> 01:19:49,497 If I leave, Fong will begin to kill the others. 837 01:19:49,498 --> 01:19:52,084 It is my duty to bring you home. 838 01:19:54,127 --> 01:19:55,170 I command you to go. 839 01:20:00,467 --> 01:20:01,552 Go! 840 01:20:02,344 --> 01:20:03,720 Go! 841 01:21:10,662 --> 01:21:12,747 Reach for the sky, baldy! 842 01:21:12,748 --> 01:21:14,999 That's right. It's Roy. 843 01:21:15,000 --> 01:21:16,835 Am I interrupting? 844 01:21:17,669 --> 01:21:19,670 I followed you. So what? 845 01:21:19,671 --> 01:21:22,465 What am I supposed to do, let you wander off? You're a greenhorn. 846 01:21:22,466 --> 01:21:24,676 You'll get killed out here. 847 01:21:26,512 --> 01:21:29,013 Come on! We gotta adiós out of here, partner! Come on! 848 01:21:29,014 --> 01:21:31,642 Hyah! You gotta stick with me. 849 01:21:33,560 --> 01:21:35,604 Don't forget, we got a princess to save. 850 01:22:38,208 --> 01:22:39,751 Princess! 851 01:22:44,602 --> 01:22:46,515 Put your weapons down. 852 01:23:07,638 --> 01:23:09,292 Show me the gold. 853 01:23:34,181 --> 01:23:37,476 Give my regards to the emperor, Princess. 854 01:23:57,704 --> 01:24:00,456 - Chon Wang? - Chon Wang? 855 01:24:00,457 --> 01:24:01,792 Chon Wang? 856 01:24:06,255 --> 01:24:08,841 That's right, Johnny Wayne is here. 857 01:24:10,509 --> 01:24:11,844 Hey, it's me. 858 01:24:12,511 --> 01:24:14,512 Why did you cut his hair? 859 01:24:14,513 --> 01:24:16,931 I tried to warn you, but you wouldn't listen. 860 01:24:16,932 --> 01:24:19,183 Go on, drop the gun. 861 01:24:19,184 --> 01:24:21,103 Now, slide it over. 862 01:24:31,113 --> 01:24:32,322 Is that her? 863 01:24:33,699 --> 01:24:35,701 She's pretty. 864 01:24:36,869 --> 01:24:37,953 Grab her. 865 01:24:39,526 --> 01:24:41,616 Come on. We'll take it from here, guys. 866 01:24:42,382 --> 01:24:44,522 I won't let you take the Princess back. 867 01:24:47,644 --> 01:24:51,799 Who do you think you are? Have you forgotten your responsibility? 868 01:24:53,596 --> 01:24:55,712 The Princess does not wish to return to China. 869 01:25:02,105 --> 01:25:04,906 We are bound by Imperial decree, and you, Chon Wang, will not stop us! 870 01:25:05,803 --> 01:25:08,034 John, what... John, get up. 871 01:25:08,059 --> 01:25:10,318 What are you... I thought we were past this. 872 01:25:10,319 --> 01:25:12,154 Come on, John. 873 01:25:14,740 --> 01:25:17,910 Do you see? He will always be a slave. 874 01:25:34,426 --> 01:25:36,094 This is the West, 875 01:25:38,514 --> 01:25:40,098 not the East. 876 01:25:43,185 --> 01:25:45,479 And the sun may rise 877 01:25:46,188 --> 01:25:48,232 where we come from, 878 01:25:49,775 --> 01:25:51,777 but here is where it sets. 879 01:25:55,280 --> 01:25:58,784 You want me to translate? The princess stays. 880 01:26:00,118 --> 01:26:02,120 The princess stays. 881 01:26:02,704 --> 01:26:05,540 I grab the gold, you marry the princess. 882 01:26:05,541 --> 01:26:08,710 We both hang Fong, call it a day. Mission accomplished. 883 01:26:11,839 --> 01:26:13,549 Well, well. 884 01:26:16,593 --> 01:26:19,304 Nice to see we're all churchgoers. 885 01:26:21,223 --> 01:26:23,308 Son of a bitch! With my own guns! 886 01:26:24,643 --> 01:26:26,854 Sweet, ain't it? 887 01:26:35,988 --> 01:26:39,491 How about that? It's a Mexican standoff. 888 01:26:40,909 --> 01:26:43,537 Only we ain't got no Mexicans. 889 01:27:02,848 --> 01:27:03,974 No! 890 01:27:05,392 --> 01:27:07,186 Princess Pei Pei! 891 01:27:14,767 --> 01:27:16,195 Princess, run! 892 01:27:17,604 --> 01:27:19,032 Princess, run for your life! 893 01:28:21,927 --> 01:28:24,178 - I hit you? - No. 894 01:28:24,179 --> 01:28:26,722 But you're gettin' really close. 895 01:28:26,723 --> 01:28:29,351 You've almost killed me, like, 17 times already. 896 01:28:32,771 --> 01:28:34,648 Eighteen, 19, 20! 897 01:28:36,441 --> 01:28:38,360 You're on fire today! 898 01:29:33,624 --> 01:29:36,195 Go, save the Princess! 899 01:30:20,128 --> 01:30:22,047 How do you survive out here? 900 01:30:22,714 --> 01:30:25,259 What's that supposed to mean? These aren't my... 901 01:30:25,634 --> 01:30:27,219 These guns are really weird. 902 01:31:02,421 --> 01:31:04,214 Oh, man. 903 01:31:06,813 --> 01:31:09,386 Stay low! 904 01:31:45,255 --> 01:31:47,965 Maybe we should let bygones be bygones. 905 01:31:47,966 --> 01:31:49,343 You got off some good shots. 906 01:31:50,177 --> 01:31:54,597 I got off some good ones. Let's call it a tie. 907 01:31:54,598 --> 01:31:56,683 What's the matter, O'Bannon? Out of bullets? 908 01:31:57,100 --> 01:31:59,144 No, I got one left. 909 01:32:00,687 --> 01:32:02,606 Tell you what I'll do. 910 01:32:02,898 --> 01:32:06,442 I'll take out all my bullets but one. 911 01:32:06,443 --> 01:32:09,279 And that way, we'll be even. How's that? 912 01:32:10,822 --> 01:32:13,158 Okay. That sounds fair. 913 01:32:13,992 --> 01:32:15,285 You'd do that for me? 914 01:32:16,620 --> 01:32:17,788 Oh, yeah. 915 01:32:21,500 --> 01:32:23,335 You bet I would. 916 01:33:44,499 --> 01:33:46,001 We come out on three. 917 01:33:46,502 --> 01:33:49,087 Okay, but... But let me count. 918 01:33:51,924 --> 01:33:54,425 Fight with honor. Okay. 919 01:33:54,426 --> 01:33:56,136 Fight with... Okay. One! 920 01:33:57,221 --> 01:34:00,097 Two! Two and a half! 921 01:34:00,098 --> 01:34:01,767 Two and seven-eighths! 922 01:34:01,892 --> 01:34:03,060 Three! 923 01:34:23,372 --> 01:34:25,832 How the hell did that happen? 924 01:35:06,331 --> 01:35:08,000 It's a miracle. 925 01:35:09,835 --> 01:35:12,296 I am invincible. 926 01:35:13,881 --> 01:35:15,549 Roy! 927 01:35:16,341 --> 01:35:19,178 Invincible! 928 01:36:06,683 --> 01:36:10,312 - Now it's time for you to die. - Adiós, partner. 929 01:36:42,094 --> 01:36:43,595 Wow. 930 01:37:01,280 --> 01:37:03,240 Roy! 931 01:37:12,457 --> 01:37:14,293 He took the gold. 932 01:37:28,640 --> 01:37:31,642 Is that all you care about, is the gold? 933 01:37:31,643 --> 01:37:33,270 Shame on you. 934 01:37:34,354 --> 01:37:37,607 There's more to life than money. I hope you learn that one day. 935 01:37:37,608 --> 01:37:39,734 What happened? 936 01:37:39,735 --> 01:37:42,862 What? Nothing, nothing. I just killed him. How'd you do? 937 01:37:42,863 --> 01:37:44,071 How? 938 01:37:44,072 --> 01:37:45,698 What do you mean, how? I shot him with my gun. 939 01:37:45,699 --> 01:37:47,700 Come on. Tell me the truth. 940 01:37:47,701 --> 01:37:50,745 It was unbelievable. You missed a miracle. I had one bullet left. 941 01:37:50,746 --> 01:37:52,330 He had, like, a million left. 942 01:37:52,331 --> 01:37:54,248 He lied to me and told me that he only had one, too. 943 01:37:54,249 --> 01:37:56,251 But... But when... But when he... 944 01:38:01,601 --> 01:38:05,709 On the battlefield a soldier can't always obey the General's orders. 945 01:38:08,889 --> 01:38:10,933 - She's staying? - Yes. 946 01:38:12,267 --> 01:38:14,937 - Can I stand? - Yes. 947 01:38:18,190 --> 01:38:21,360 Reach for the sky, O'Bannon! 948 01:38:21,693 --> 01:38:24,445 That's my line. He stole my gang, he's stealing my lines. 949 01:38:24,446 --> 01:38:26,073 - That's unbelievable. - Roy! Roy! 950 01:38:26,448 --> 01:38:27,783 Get back! 951 01:38:28,951 --> 01:38:30,285 Stop, stop. It's Wallace. 952 01:38:30,702 --> 01:38:32,078 Hey, Roy, 953 01:38:32,079 --> 01:38:35,832 we know you been moonlightin' on us with that old yellow fella from the train! 954 01:38:36,166 --> 01:38:37,876 You guys, you stay here. This isn't your battle. 955 01:38:38,544 --> 01:38:41,547 No, we stick together. We are partners. 956 01:38:44,424 --> 01:38:46,176 That's beautiful. 957 01:38:51,557 --> 01:38:52,724 You go out the back door. 958 01:38:53,350 --> 01:38:55,726 - No. - Don't worry, Princess. 959 01:38:55,727 --> 01:38:58,063 I promise you, I will see you again. 960 01:38:59,147 --> 01:39:01,316 That which you have promised, 961 01:39:01,900 --> 01:39:03,694 you must perform. 962 01:39:19,084 --> 01:39:20,335 - Get out of the way! - Why? 963 01:39:21,003 --> 01:39:22,796 - Come on! - Why? What are you... 964 01:39:24,715 --> 01:39:28,177 - What are you doing? Are you crazy? - No, John, stop, stop. 965 01:39:28,635 --> 01:39:30,136 They can't touch me. 966 01:39:30,137 --> 01:39:32,847 Something happened back there. It was a miracle. 967 01:39:32,848 --> 01:39:34,015 There's no way... 968 01:39:34,016 --> 01:39:36,101 Hey, smart-ass! Do you hear me? 969 01:39:36,476 --> 01:39:39,104 Time's up, O'Bannon! It's the end of the line! 970 01:39:39,438 --> 01:39:41,230 We can take these guys. 971 01:39:41,231 --> 01:39:42,774 Yep, we can take them. 972 01:39:43,442 --> 01:39:46,778 Are you comin' out, or ain't you? 973 01:39:47,487 --> 01:39:48,572 Gun. 974 01:39:58,874 --> 01:40:01,376 You really are the Shanghai Kid. 975 01:40:04,713 --> 01:40:06,798 Nice riding with you, partner. 976 01:40:18,310 --> 01:40:20,354 We go out on three. I count. 977 01:40:20,938 --> 01:40:22,689 No, I count. 978 01:40:23,273 --> 01:40:25,150 We'll both count. 979 01:40:25,817 --> 01:40:28,444 One, two, three! 980 01:40:39,081 --> 01:40:42,793 - Indians! Look out! - No! My family! My family! 981 01:40:49,591 --> 01:40:52,302 - Friends. Brothers! - Roy! 982 01:40:52,511 --> 01:40:57,266 I gotta tell ya, we always figured you for a dumbshit, 983 01:40:57,975 --> 01:41:01,019 but, uh, we was thinkin' maybe you wanna come back and rejoin the gang. 984 01:41:01,687 --> 01:41:04,480 - So, uh, what do you say? - Yeah, what do you say? 985 01:41:04,481 --> 01:41:05,816 I think I'm just gonna wing it. 986 01:41:06,692 --> 01:41:07,775 All right. 987 01:41:07,776 --> 01:41:09,820 - And you are goin' to jail. - That works, too. 988 01:41:13,571 --> 01:41:15,393 How, kimosabe! 989 01:41:15,534 --> 01:41:17,734 How, kimosabe! 990 01:41:27,546 --> 01:41:29,589 Oh, it's nice to be standing here next to you. 991 01:41:29,590 --> 01:41:32,259 I don't think I've ever gotten a chance to thank you for... 992 01:41:32,551 --> 01:41:35,178 For saving us so many times. 993 01:41:35,179 --> 01:41:38,639 I wish you could understand what... I feel like there's this gap between us. 994 01:41:38,640 --> 01:41:41,017 It's like, I'm a cowboy, you're an Indian. 995 01:41:41,018 --> 01:41:42,852 You say "wampum," I say "money." 996 01:41:42,853 --> 01:41:44,605 At a certain point, I just think... 997 01:41:49,109 --> 01:41:51,403 Shut up, Roy. You talk too much. 998 01:41:52,029 --> 01:41:54,448 Did... Did... She just... 999 01:42:07,002 --> 01:42:11,548 There she is, right on time, carrying a big, fat payroll. 1000 01:42:13,091 --> 01:42:15,636 Oh. 1001 01:42:16,762 --> 01:42:18,972 I don't know if I'll ever get used to this one. 1002 01:42:21,767 --> 01:42:23,393 Don't worry. You'll get used to it. 1003 01:42:23,644 --> 01:42:26,270 I can guarantee you, we won't get half as many girls being lawmen. 1004 01:42:26,271 --> 01:42:28,439 I know we're spoken for, but... 1005 01:42:28,440 --> 01:42:30,526 You never know what's gonna happen in a relationship. 1006 01:42:32,319 --> 01:42:35,780 I gotta get rid of my outlaw name. That's not gonna work anymore. 1007 01:42:35,781 --> 01:42:38,617 Really? What would you call yourself? 1008 01:42:39,535 --> 01:42:42,955 I don't know. I mean, my real name's Wyatt Earp, but... 1009 01:42:43,288 --> 01:42:46,707 Earp? That's a terrible name for a cowboy. 1010 01:42:46,708 --> 01:42:49,294 - Why? - Bad. 1011 01:42:49,419 --> 01:42:50,795 - Really? - Bad! 1012 01:42:50,796 --> 01:42:53,089 And John Wayne's a great cowboy name? 1013 01:42:53,090 --> 01:42:54,299 Roy, look. 1014 01:42:54,800 --> 01:42:56,093 There they are. 1015 01:42:56,969 --> 01:43:00,889 Yep. Look at those amateurs. That's my move! 1016 01:43:01,598 --> 01:43:03,725 Come on, Roy. Let's go say "howdy." 1017 01:43:03,851 --> 01:43:05,852 Let's go! Hyah! Hyah! 1018 01:43:05,853 --> 01:43:07,479 - Yee-haw! - Yee-haw! 1019 01:43:15,320 --> 01:43:16,905 - Yee-haw! - Yee-haw! 1020 01:43:24,079 --> 01:43:25,330 Scene up. 1021 01:43:26,999 --> 01:43:30,501 That which you have promised, you must perform. 1022 01:43:32,254 --> 01:43:34,256 Hello. 1023 01:43:34,506 --> 01:43:37,008 He was part of your "rushimiant..." 1024 01:43:37,009 --> 01:43:38,552 What? Regiment. 1025 01:43:38,760 --> 01:43:40,511 He's one of your bandits. 1026 01:43:40,512 --> 01:43:42,556 He's one of your... He's one of your... 1027 01:43:42,806 --> 01:43:45,766 He was part of your regiment of "dentists." 1028 01:43:45,767 --> 01:43:47,811 Bandits. Dentists? 1029 01:43:51,815 --> 01:43:53,817 Wow! Shit! 1030 01:43:58,405 --> 01:44:00,698 He didn't teeth brush this morning. 1031 01:44:00,699 --> 01:44:02,158 Lose this thing, too, I'm gonna cut off... 1032 01:44:02,159 --> 01:44:03,285 No! 1033 01:44:09,041 --> 01:44:10,626 I can't do stunts, man. 1034 01:44:17,049 --> 01:44:19,760 What's this princess like? 1035 01:44:25,557 --> 01:44:28,352 I got air bubbles coming out of my thing. 1036 01:44:29,144 --> 01:44:30,729 Uno más, please. 1037 01:44:33,565 --> 01:44:36,944 Uno más... 1038 01:44:38,237 --> 01:44:39,863 Thanks, Fido. 1039 01:44:54,586 --> 01:44:57,839 One, two, three! 1040 01:44:59,716 --> 01:45:01,301 Shit! 1041 01:45:05,973 --> 01:45:09,475 Thank you so much, Princess. You're so good. 1042 01:45:09,476 --> 01:45:12,938 Princess! Oh, I love you so much. 1043 01:45:13,230 --> 01:45:16,190 I'm talking to you! Turn around! 1044 01:45:16,191 --> 01:45:18,109 Ask me if I give a shit. 73048

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