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1
00:00:05,200 --> 00:00:08,200
Homer vs. Lisa vs. The 8th Commandment
2
00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:42,700
-Evening, Carver of Graven Images.
-Homer the Thief. How's business?
3
00:01:43,100 --> 00:01:46,600
Been a little slow.
Not much to steal in the desert.
4
00:01:46,900 --> 00:01:52,100
Do not worry. We'll be wandering
out here another two weeks, tops.
5
00:01:53,400 --> 00:01:56,300
Zohar the Adulterer.
My wife sends her regards.
6
00:01:56,700 --> 00:02:01,900
-Yes, she's a good woman. Very good.
-Thank you, my lusty friend.
7
00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:14,000
-Moses is back.
-Quick! Everybody, look busy.
8
00:02:15,300 --> 00:02:19,800
The Lord has handed down to us
10 commandments by which to live.
9
00:02:20,200 --> 00:02:22,800
I will read them
in no particular order.
10
00:02:23,100 --> 00:02:27,800
-"Thou shalt not make graven images."
-Oh, my God!
11
00:02:28,200 --> 00:02:33,100
-"Thou shalt not commit adultery."
-Well, looks like the party's over.
12
00:02:33,500 --> 00:02:36,400
Hey, Moses. Keep them coming!
13
00:02:36,800 --> 00:02:39,900
"Thou shalt not steal."
14
00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:42,200
Sorry, Homer.
15
00:02:48,400 --> 00:02:53,100
That's the most dishonest thing I've
ever heard! I should box your ears!
16
00:02:53,600 --> 00:02:55,700
-You sneaky Pete!
-Easy, tiger.
17
00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:58,100
You, easy. Get off my property!
18
00:02:58,400 --> 00:03:01,300
Flanders, who put that bug
up your butt?
19
00:03:01,600 --> 00:03:05,000
I wanted to subscribe to the
arts and crafts channel.
20
00:03:05,300 --> 00:03:09,000
They sent this man to install it.
You know what he did?
21
00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:13,600
He offered to hook me up illegally
to every channel for $50.
22
00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:16,400
Boy, what's this world coming to?
23
00:03:16,700 --> 00:03:19,000
-That's exactly--
-Gotta go.
24
00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:22,300
Hey, stop, cable man!
Stop!
25
00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:30,300
-What do you want?
-I want free cable!
26
00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:34,600
This is okay.
Everybody does it, right?
27
00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:38,800
What? If you're having second
thoughts, read this.
28
00:03:39,100 --> 00:03:42,000
"So You've Decided
to Steal Cable."
29
00:03:42,400 --> 00:03:44,900
"Myth: Cable piracy is wrong.
30
00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:50,400
Fact: Cable companies are faceless
corporations which makes it okay."
31
00:03:52,700 --> 00:03:55,400
The clown that will last
a lifetime.
32
00:03:55,700 --> 00:03:59,600
Cable. It's more wonderful
than I dared hope!
33
00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:02,900
Don't you hate it
when you go to the toilet...
34
00:04:03,200 --> 00:04:05,400
...and there's no toilet paper?
35
00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:09,800
It's funny because it's true!
36
00:04:10,100 --> 00:04:13,400
Oh, hey! Family! Family, come here.
37
00:04:13,800 --> 00:04:19,000
I have an announcement to make.
The Simpsons have cable!
38
00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:20,300
Cable?!
39
00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:23,800
Right. 68 channels.
MTV for the kids.
40
00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:29,200
VH1 for us. 1600 hours
of quality programming every day.
41
00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:33,900
We've talked about cable before.
You think we can afford it?
42
00:04:34,300 --> 00:04:37,700
Nothing a month?
Yeah, I think we can swing that.
43
00:04:38,100 --> 00:04:39,600
Is this legal?
44
00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:41,500
Don't worry.
Look at this.
45
00:04:41,800 --> 00:04:45,800
"Myth: It's only fair to pay for
quality first-run movies.
46
00:04:46,300 --> 00:04:49,500
Fact: Most movies on cable
get two stars or less...
47
00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:52,500
...and are repeated ad nauseam."
48
00:04:53,100 --> 00:04:55,600
-I don't know.
-Marge.
49
00:04:55,900 --> 00:04:58,700
Hear Me Roar,
the network for women.
50
00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:04,800
We'll teach you to lower your
bill by making your own Band-Aids.
51
00:05:05,300 --> 00:05:07,500
Oh, that's a good idea.
52
00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:11,800
Before we begin, you'll need
5 yards of sterilized cotton.
53
00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:21,300
Pro wrestling from Mexico.
Down there, it's a real sport.
54
00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:24,900
This is where Jaws eats the boat.
55
00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:28,000
Here, Die Hard
jumps through the window.
56
00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:31,100
This is where Wall Street
gets arrested.
57
00:05:31,400 --> 00:05:36,600
If I could call your attention
to the Subsidy Appropriations...
58
00:05:37,100 --> 00:05:41,300
...Override Bill.
I refer you to page 4500--
59
00:05:41,700 --> 00:05:43,500
They think people watch that.
60
00:05:43,900 --> 00:05:48,400
Live, from New Orleans. This is the
World Series of Cockfighting!
61
00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:52,400
Son of a gun, we'll have big fun
on the bayou tonight.
62
00:05:52,700 --> 00:05:56,800
We'd get there quicker
if I drove my dad's car.
63
00:05:57,200 --> 00:06:01,900
-Aren't you ready for church, Homer?
-Huh? What? Okay.
64
00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:10,600
Today's Christian doesn't think
he needs God.
65
00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:15,600
He thinks he's got it made.
He's got his hi-fi. His boob tube.
66
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:18,100
And his instant pizza pie.
67
00:06:18,500 --> 00:06:19,900
Oh, pizza.
68
00:06:20,500 --> 00:06:26,100
Children, I don't want you to get
frightened but I must teach you this.
69
00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:29,200
Today's topic will be hell.
70
00:06:29,800 --> 00:06:34,700
I sat through mercy and forgiveness.
Finally, we get to the good stuff.
71
00:06:35,200 --> 00:06:39,700
Hell is terrible! Maggots are
your sheet, worms your blanket.
72
00:06:40,100 --> 00:06:44,700
There's a lake of fire burning
with sulfur. You'll be tormented.
73
00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:50,100
If you actually saw hell, you'd be
so frightened you would die.
74
00:06:50,500 --> 00:06:52,200
-Miss Albright?
-Yes.
75
00:06:52,500 --> 00:06:56,100
-Won't you eventually get used to it?
-No.
76
00:06:56,400 --> 00:06:58,800
-Yes.
-Are there pirates in hell?
77
00:06:59,200 --> 00:07:01,700
-Thousands of them.
-Oh, baby!
78
00:07:02,100 --> 00:07:05,800
So there's a downside
to the afterlife.
79
00:07:06,100 --> 00:07:08,700
How does one steer
clear of this?
80
00:07:09,100 --> 00:07:11,500
By obeying the 10 Commandments.
81
00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:15,200
Ten simple rules
that are easy to live by.
82
00:07:20,600 --> 00:07:23,700
-What did you children learn about?
-Hell.
83
00:07:24,100 --> 00:07:27,600
I sure as hell can't tell you we
learned about hell...
84
00:07:27,900 --> 00:07:30,500
-...unless I say "hell."
-He has a point.
85
00:07:30,900 --> 00:07:32,000
Hell, yes!
86
00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:34,300
Hell, hell, hell, hell....
87
00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:40,600
Bart! You're no longer in
Sunday school. Don't swear.
88
00:07:44,500 --> 00:07:48,300
Hey, anybody up for a little
so-called pay-TV?
89
00:07:49,700 --> 00:07:53,500
-Are you sure this isn't stealing?
-Read the pamphlet.
90
00:07:53,900 --> 00:07:56,100
Hello, I'm Troy McClure.
91
00:07:56,400 --> 00:08:01,000
You may remember me from Cry Yuma
and Here Comes the Coast Guard!
92
00:08:01,400 --> 00:08:06,200
I'd like to talk about a candy that
cleans and straightens your teeth!
93
00:08:06,600 --> 00:08:09,300
A program-length advertisement!
94
00:08:09,700 --> 00:08:14,900
Wait a minute. I'm confused.
Did you say "cleans and straightens"?
95
00:08:15,300 --> 00:08:18,300
There's no confusion.
Just good science.
96
00:08:18,600 --> 00:08:22,300
Ladies and gentlemen,
the inventor, Dr. Nick Riviera.
97
00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:26,200
-Thank you, Troy. Hi, everybody!
-Hi, Dr. Riviera!
98
00:08:26,500 --> 00:08:31,700
Now, could I have a volunteer?
Somebody with crooked, yellow teeth.
99
00:08:44,300 --> 00:08:48,200
Come on, Lisa.
Watch a little cable with us.
100
00:08:48,700 --> 00:08:51,400
It won't cost you a thing.
101
00:08:51,800 --> 00:08:54,300
Except your soul!
102
00:08:55,700 --> 00:08:59,600
-What's gotten into Lisa?
-Beats the hell out of me!
103
00:09:10,100 --> 00:09:12,800
-What are you doing?
-What do you mean?
104
00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:16,000
-Remember the 8th commandment?
-Of course.
105
00:09:16,300 --> 00:09:20,000
Thou shalt not....
Covet...
106
00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:23,000
...graven images.
Something about covet.
107
00:09:23,300 --> 00:09:26,200
Thou shalt not steal!
108
00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:29,600
Anything else?
109
00:09:31,400 --> 00:09:35,000
Yes. I ate two grapes.
Please charge me for them.
110
00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:37,600
Two grapes? Who cares?
111
00:09:37,900 --> 00:09:40,800
-Just charge me something, please.
-Okay.
112
00:09:41,100 --> 00:09:44,800
I need a price check on two grapes.
You heard me, Phil.
113
00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:47,500
Two measly, stinking grapes.
114
00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:52,000
If you didn't catch it
in the theater or rent it...
115
00:09:52,500 --> 00:09:55,500
... we've got it!
On the Blockbuster Channel!
116
00:09:55,800 --> 00:09:58,700
Why is the world
a cesspool of corruption?
117
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:02,200
Oh, great. All right,
what makes you say that?
118
00:10:02,600 --> 00:10:05,700
In Sunday school we learned
stealing is a sin.
119
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:09,000
But everybody does it.
We're stealing cable.
120
00:10:10,500 --> 00:10:14,500
-Did you pay for your breakfast?
-No.
121
00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:18,000
-Did you pay for your clothes?
-No, I didn't.
122
00:10:18,300 --> 00:10:21,700
Run for the hills, Ma Barker,
before I call the feds!
123
00:10:22,100 --> 00:10:26,000
-I think that's pretty spurious.
-Well, thank you, honey.
124
00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:29,500
Friday night, live.
The ultimate matchup.
125
00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:32,800
The bout to knock
the other guy out.
126
00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:36,500
Watson-Tatum Two.
This time it's for money!
127
00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:40,100
-Oh, boy!
-Only on the Blockbuster Channel.
128
00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:47,900
How can one little insulated wire
bring so much happiness?
129
00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:54,500
Big fight coming up.
130
00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:57,800
Wanna come over and
listen to it on the radio?
131
00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:03,100
Okay. After the fight, we can
watch the still photos on the news.
132
00:11:03,500 --> 00:11:05,700
Not too shabby!
What do you say?
133
00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:09,500
We could do that, yeah.
134
00:11:09,900 --> 00:11:14,200
Or we could go over to my house
and watch it live on cable TV!
135
00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:17,800
-Get off!
-You're kidding me!
136
00:11:18,100 --> 00:11:19,900
Pass the pumice, please.
137
00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:22,400
He's Homer from sector 7-G.
138
00:11:22,700 --> 00:11:26,900
Excellent. I'm so keen on seeing
Watson vs. Tatum Two...
139
00:11:27,300 --> 00:11:31,700
...I'd even go to an employee's house.
I can picture it now.
140
00:11:32,100 --> 00:11:35,100
The screen door resting off
its hinges.
141
00:11:35,500 --> 00:11:39,700
Mangy dog staggering about
looking vainly for a place to die.
142
00:11:40,100 --> 00:11:42,100
-May I speak frankly?
-Yes.
143
00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:46,900
-You are quite wealthy.
-Thank you. Your candor is refreshing.
144
00:11:47,300 --> 00:11:50,000
Why don't you pay for
the fight yourself?
145
00:11:50,300 --> 00:11:55,800
The big fight is one of those rare
occasions that I savor the sights...
146
00:11:56,300 --> 00:12:00,300
...the sounds and the smells
of other men.
147
00:12:00,500 --> 00:12:02,600
You haven't lost the common touch.
148
00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:07,300
-So, Homer, I hear you got the fight.
-That's right.
149
00:12:07,600 --> 00:12:11,600
-8:00, my place. Come one, come all.
-All right.
150
00:12:12,000 --> 00:12:15,400
Moe, how come you never got
cable for the bar?
151
00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:19,300
Well, it was either cable
or the mechanical bull.
152
00:12:19,600 --> 00:12:22,100
I made my choice and I stand by it.
153
00:12:24,700 --> 00:12:28,600
-Somebody's having a party.
-Friday night. Wanna come over?
154
00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:33,300
No, thanks. I'm open 24 hours.
It puts great demands on my time.
155
00:12:33,700 --> 00:12:36,200
Too bad.
It'll be a great fight.
156
00:12:36,500 --> 00:12:40,700
The fight! I'll get my brother,
Sanjay, to cover for me.
157
00:12:41,200 --> 00:12:43,500
He deplores violence.
158
00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:49,100
If a man takes bread to feed his
starving family, that's stealing?
159
00:12:49,500 --> 00:12:53,400
No. It is if he puts anything
on it. Jelly, for example.
160
00:12:53,700 --> 00:12:55,000
I see.
161
00:12:55,300 --> 00:12:59,400
You're here for a reason.
Is your father stealing bread?
162
00:12:59,800 --> 00:13:05,100
I don't watch him every minute.
But we're getting cable for free.
163
00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:10,400
I'm afraid that is stealing.
I think you must do something.
164
00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:15,100
-Should I have him arrested?
-That seems like an ideal solution.
165
00:13:15,500 --> 00:13:20,400
But remember the 5th commandment:
"Honor thy father and thy mother."
166
00:13:21,900 --> 00:13:26,700
I would like to see you
set an example by not watching...
167
00:13:27,100 --> 00:13:30,600
-...the offending technology yourself.
-Thank you.
168
00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:36,200
You're watching Top Hat Entertainment.
Adult programming all day, every day.
169
00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:41,800
Except in Florida and Utah.
Coming up next, Stardust Mammaries.
170
00:13:44,300 --> 00:13:47,000
-Ay, carumba!
-Bart!
171
00:13:47,300 --> 00:13:51,200
-Here's what I was looking for.
-Blue chips closed up 3 3/4.
172
00:13:51,700 --> 00:13:54,000
Oil service stocks slumped....
173
00:13:54,300 --> 00:13:57,100
You shouldn't watch
that other channel.
174
00:13:57,600 --> 00:14:00,900
It's for mommies and daddies
who love each other.
175
00:14:01,200 --> 00:14:04,700
-Promise me you won't ever watch it.
-Okay.
176
00:14:05,100 --> 00:14:07,800
-Promise me.
-I promise I won't watch it.
177
00:14:08,100 --> 00:14:09,500
-Good boy.
-Hi, Dad.
178
00:14:09,900 --> 00:14:13,100
Stealing cable is wrong,
so I'm not watching it...
179
00:14:13,400 --> 00:14:18,000
...in the hope that others will
follow my example. Thank you.
180
00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:21,900
Hey, Lisa. Racing from Belmont?
Horsies!
181
00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:24,900
Sorry, I'd rather go to heaven.
182
00:14:25,500 --> 00:14:29,200
There's something wrong
with that kid. She's so moral.
183
00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:33,200
Why can't she be more like...?
Well, not like Bart.
184
00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:37,400
-But there's gotta be a happy medium.
-Well, you know....
185
00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:40,300
Bart was looking at that
racy movie.
186
00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:43,800
And Lisa is losing
a little respect for you.
187
00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:48,000
Maybe we should think about
unhooking the cable.
188
00:14:48,300 --> 00:14:52,500
-Unhook it? But I love cable!
-Then you should pay for it.
189
00:14:52,900 --> 00:14:57,200
I can't afford it. When I can
afford to pay for it, I will.
190
00:14:57,600 --> 00:15:00,000
But I can't
so I'm not going to.
191
00:15:00,300 --> 00:15:03,900
Cable has become an evil presence
in our home.
192
00:15:04,300 --> 00:15:08,800
Marge, I never put my foot down
about anything.
193
00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:11,600
But I'm severely tempted
to do it.
194
00:15:11,900 --> 00:15:14,500
-No.
-I'm sorry, it's coming down.
195
00:15:14,900 --> 00:15:17,300
-No.
-It's coming down. That's it!
196
00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:21,900
It's coming down! The cable stays.
The foot has spoken.
197
00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:26,500
-Lemonade? Please.
-Seen it.
198
00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,400
-Cleans and straightens--
-Seen it.
199
00:15:29,700 --> 00:15:31,700
-Seen it.
-I was poor.
200
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:34,700
Soccer. Seen it.
201
00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:37,100
-Simpson.
-How did you get in?
202
00:15:37,500 --> 00:15:40,200
Your door wasn't locked well enough.
203
00:15:40,500 --> 00:15:44,300
Would you be interested
in this stereo? A $500 value.
204
00:15:44,700 --> 00:15:46,700
You can have it for $40.
205
00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:50,200
-Get out! Criminal!
-I'll go see a neighbor.
206
00:15:50,500 --> 00:15:53,700
-He's not home!
-Even better.
207
00:15:58,600 --> 00:16:01,600
You sure about this?
Doesn't look friendly.
208
00:16:02,100 --> 00:16:05,200
Can't be too careful.
Thieves are everywhere.
209
00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:08,900
I'm not talking about
the small, forgivable stuff.
210
00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:13,000
Come one, come all!
Top Hat Theater is on the air!
211
00:16:13,300 --> 00:16:18,400
The most beautiful women! Just 50
cents! I'm your host, Bart Simpson!
212
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:21,700
You must be at least
8 years old.
213
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:28,900
And now The Top Hat Channel is
proud to present Broadcast Nudes.
214
00:16:30,600 --> 00:16:33,900
-Gross!
-Yet strangely compelling.
215
00:16:34,400 --> 00:16:36,500
-It's a raid!
-What the--?
216
00:16:39,100 --> 00:16:41,300
I know you. Come back here!
217
00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:47,600
You promised me you wouldn't watch
that trash. Go to your room!
218
00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:50,900
I wish I was an adult
so I could break rules.
219
00:16:51,200 --> 00:16:52,200
Oh, great.
220
00:16:55,400 --> 00:17:00,000
-I brought some imported generic beer.
-Thank you, Barney.
221
00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:04,000
-How many people are coming?
-Just a select circle.
222
00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:07,100
Hello!
I brought an assortment of jerkies.
223
00:17:07,600 --> 00:17:12,500
-Did you swipe those from work?
-Certainly not. What are you implying?
224
00:17:12,900 --> 00:17:16,300
There is no love lost between
these two warriors.
225
00:17:16,600 --> 00:17:20,000
We almost had a scuffle
today at the weigh-in.
226
00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:23,600
You have a special motivation
going into this bout.
227
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:28,800
I want to dedicate this fight to
my manager, Vinnie, who got me here...
228
00:17:29,300 --> 00:17:30,600
...and then...
229
00:17:31,700 --> 00:17:34,900
-...passed away two weeks ago.
-Any response?
230
00:17:35,200 --> 00:17:39,200
I would also like to dedicate
this fight to this manager.
231
00:17:39,700 --> 00:17:41,300
-You can't!
-I can!
232
00:17:41,600 --> 00:17:44,500
You dedicate the fight
to your manager!
233
00:17:44,900 --> 00:17:48,400
I want to tell you
that I'm not watching this fight.
234
00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:51,800
It's my form of nonviolent protest.
235
00:17:54,500 --> 00:17:56,300
Hi, Homer. I brought you--
236
00:17:56,600 --> 00:18:00,700
Quick! It's Moe.
I gotta hide the mugs.
237
00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:09,200
Will you get--? Hey, go protest
outside, will you? Now!
238
00:18:11,600 --> 00:18:14,300
-Hi. I brought you a mug.
-Thank you.
239
00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:16,900
I always wanted one of these.
240
00:18:18,900 --> 00:18:20,800
Oh! Mr. Burns!
241
00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:25,400
-Hide the stuff I borrowed from work!
-Borrowed?
242
00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:29,300
-Okay, that stuff I stole from work.
-Oh, okay.
243
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:37,000
Come on! Take all this.
Put it in the closet.
244
00:18:37,500 --> 00:18:39,900
Will you quit staring at me
like that?
245
00:18:40,900 --> 00:18:45,300
Hello. We were in the neighborhood
and thought we'd drop by.
246
00:18:47,100 --> 00:18:50,300
Hello, Mr. Burns.
Like to watch the fight?
247
00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:52,800
The fight! Don't mind if I do.
248
00:18:53,100 --> 00:18:57,200
Oh, Simpson. Good news.
I brought some munchies.
249
00:18:57,600 --> 00:18:59,800
Smithers, the Cheetos.
250
00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:06,900
In but a few scant minutes,
the anticipation--
251
00:19:08,900 --> 00:19:09,900
-Simpson?
-Yes.
252
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:13,300
-You have an illegal cable hookup.
-No. No, l--
253
00:19:13,800 --> 00:19:16,900
It wasn't me.
It was my wife's idea. Yeah!
254
00:19:17,800 --> 00:19:19,200
Hey, hey, hey.
255
00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:21,000
Settle down, fella.
256
00:19:21,300 --> 00:19:24,200
We were hoping
we could watch the fight.
257
00:19:24,500 --> 00:19:26,900
Oh, sure, sure. Be my guest.
258
00:19:31,700 --> 00:19:35,400
-Here's lemonade for your protest.
-Thanks, Mom.
259
00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:38,800
-It isn't going very well.
-Don't give up.
260
00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:42,200
When you love somebody,
you must have faith...
261
00:19:42,500 --> 00:19:45,000
...that they will do the right thing.
262
00:19:45,700 --> 00:19:49,600
He learned how to fight
in the projects of Capital City...
263
00:19:49,900 --> 00:19:53,500
...and honed his skills while
serving time for assault...
264
00:19:53,900 --> 00:19:56,100
...in Springfield Prison.
265
00:19:56,400 --> 00:19:59,000
All right! A local boy!
266
00:19:59,300 --> 00:20:03,600
For 5 years, I was away from
my kids and their mothers.
267
00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:06,400
The conditions were irrevocable.
268
00:20:06,700 --> 00:20:11,400
Assault. Manslaughter.
Stealing cable TV!
269
00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:17,300
Marge! Lisa! Maggie!
270
00:20:22,700 --> 00:20:25,400
Shake hands. Keep it clean.
271
00:20:25,900 --> 00:20:27,100
Come on, boy!
272
00:20:29,500 --> 00:20:33,300
Excuse me.
I hate to interrupt your judging me.
273
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:36,600
I've made a couple of
important decisions.
274
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:40,700
Number one: I'm cutting the cable
when the fight's over.
275
00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:44,300
Number two: I'm not very fond
of any of you.
276
00:20:44,700 --> 00:20:46,800
-Back to the fight.
-Get down!
277
00:20:47,100 --> 00:20:49,400
We may have saved your soul.
278
00:20:49,700 --> 00:20:51,600
Tatum is reeling!
279
00:20:51,900 --> 00:20:55,100
Yeah, at the worst possible time.
280
00:20:55,900 --> 00:20:59,100
Eight! Nine! Ten!
281
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:03,700
This fight is history!
It's done!
282
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:07,900
A stunning knockout by a thunderous
punch in the 12th round.
283
00:21:08,300 --> 00:21:11,000
Tatum is the new champion
of the world!
284
00:21:11,300 --> 00:21:15,400
Everyone to my place for
squishies and microwave burritos.
285
00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:19,700
Best fight ever and I missed it.
286
00:21:20,100 --> 00:21:22,000
We're really proud of you.
287
00:21:22,300 --> 00:21:24,500
-What a donnybrook!
-Hogwash!
288
00:21:24,900 --> 00:21:30,400
I once watched Jim Corbett fight an
Eskimo bare-knuckled for 113 rounds!
289
00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:35,400
Back then, if it was less than 50
rounds, we demanded our nickel back!
290
00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:38,900
-Cable clippers.
-Here you go.
291
00:21:39,200 --> 00:21:42,200
-Go for it, Dad.
-I beg you to reconsider.
292
00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:47,400
Tractor pulls. Atlanta Braves
baseball. Joe Franklin!
293
00:22:04,000 --> 00:22:06,500
Third time's a charm.
24311
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