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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
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2
00:00:31,339 --> 00:00:34,592
[chomping]
3
00:00:35,469 --> 00:00:36,677
[contented sigh]
4
00:00:40,057 --> 00:00:42,391
WOMAN: Yes, Kirk.
We sent them 2 samples.
5
00:00:47,647 --> 00:00:50,399
Good day, nurse. We have the therapy
for my patient downstairs?
6
00:00:52,569 --> 00:00:54,403
[telephone rings]
7
00:00:54,946 --> 00:00:56,030
Ah, thank you.
8
00:01:02,037 --> 00:01:05,164
P.A.: Dr. Berkholter,
code blue in OR 2-5-2.
9
00:01:05,165 --> 00:01:06,332
Dr. Berkholter.
10
00:01:20,097 --> 00:01:22,807
Dr. Berkholter,
code blue in OR 2-5-2.
11
00:01:23,016 --> 00:01:25,267
That's a code blue in OR 2-5-2.
12
00:01:37,906 --> 00:01:39,865
Dr. Berkholter,
where the hell are you?
13
00:01:40,033 --> 00:01:41,408
I am not fooling around.
14
00:02:03,807 --> 00:02:04,849
[ding]
15
00:02:38,508 --> 00:02:39,508
How's it going, Burt?
16
00:02:39,509 --> 00:02:41,343
Oh, boring as usual.
17
00:02:43,096 --> 00:02:45,639
Ah, you should be thankful
for small favors.
18
00:02:45,974 --> 00:02:48,976
Look at this.
Now, I would kill to be in the field.
19
00:02:50,312 --> 00:02:54,273
Burt...you have
the soul of a poet.
20
00:02:54,441 --> 00:02:55,441
Heh heh heh heh.
21
00:02:55,734 --> 00:02:56,984
[buzzer]
22
00:02:59,696 --> 00:03:00,821
Won't be a minute.
23
00:03:08,705 --> 00:03:09,788
Wake up, Mr. Oliver.
24
00:03:14,836 --> 00:03:17,046
Come on, Mr. Oliver.
It's dinnertime.
25
00:03:20,675 --> 00:03:22,551
You don't wanna miss
your last meal, do you?
26
00:03:22,802 --> 00:03:23,928
MAN: The Joint Chiefs of Staff
27
00:03:23,929 --> 00:03:26,347
have decided to discontinue
the C.H.U.D. research project.
28
00:03:26,848 --> 00:03:29,475
The remaining C.H.U.D.
is being terminated as we speak.
29
00:03:30,477 --> 00:03:32,478
Sorry, Ted. Meeting adjourned.
30
00:03:34,147 --> 00:03:35,564
Ah, I'm not into chemical war.
31
00:03:35,732 --> 00:03:38,275
I agree.
I'm more of a nuke man, myself.
32
00:03:39,361 --> 00:03:40,361
Thank God.
33
00:03:41,905 --> 00:03:42,947
I'm disappointed in you, doctor.
34
00:03:43,949 --> 00:03:45,741
Had the C.H.U.D. research continued,
35
00:03:46,743 --> 00:03:50,788
we could have had the ultimate
in biochemical warfare,
36
00:03:52,123 --> 00:03:54,625
an enzyme that would allow
soldiers to go on fighting
37
00:03:55,377 --> 00:03:57,419
even after they were
clinically dead.
38
00:03:57,963 --> 00:04:00,631
I'm afraid I don't share
your enthusiasm, Colonel.
39
00:04:02,008 --> 00:04:05,761
The C.H.U.D. enzyme stimulated
the brain to a point of frenzy.
40
00:04:06,263 --> 00:04:08,889
They showed a lot of spunk.
That's all.
41
00:04:10,141 --> 00:04:12,810
Colonel Masters,
there was a reason
42
00:04:12,811 --> 00:04:14,728
that these creatures
were kept underground.
43
00:04:16,147 --> 00:04:18,691
For instance,
the little matter of the drug's...
44
00:04:19,192 --> 00:04:21,360
cannibalistic side effects.
45
00:04:22,279 --> 00:04:24,738
A small glitch.
46
00:04:33,456 --> 00:04:34,456
What the hell?
47
00:04:36,084 --> 00:04:37,293
[static buzzing]
48
00:04:38,461 --> 00:04:41,380
[growling]
49
00:04:47,178 --> 00:04:48,178
What?!
50
00:04:48,638 --> 00:04:49,763
You sure?
51
00:04:51,558 --> 00:04:52,641
All right, we're on our way.
52
00:04:52,892 --> 00:04:53,892
What's the problem?
53
00:04:54,436 --> 00:04:55,436
The C.H.U.D.'s escaped.
54
00:04:55,437 --> 00:04:56,770
DOCTOR: Escaped?! good God!
55
00:04:56,771 --> 00:04:57,771
All right, don't panic.
56
00:04:59,024 --> 00:05:01,817
Just remember,
we don't want to damage him.
57
00:05:02,360 --> 00:05:04,653
Just freeze him till we can get him
into the cryogenic chamber.
58
00:05:08,825 --> 00:05:10,492
All right, men. Move out.
59
00:05:13,496 --> 00:05:16,165
[weapon charging]
60
00:05:23,465 --> 00:05:24,465
[whispering] And ready?
61
00:05:26,426 --> 00:05:27,843
[yowl] Aah!
62
00:05:28,762 --> 00:05:29,762
[cat yowling]
63
00:05:29,888 --> 00:05:30,888
A--A cat.
64
00:05:31,890 --> 00:05:32,890
Raah!
65
00:05:34,142 --> 00:05:41,106
Get him! Get him! Get him! Get him!
66
00:05:48,114 --> 00:05:49,156
All right,
that's enough, gentlemen.
67
00:05:49,157 --> 00:05:50,157
That's enough.
68
00:05:50,367 --> 00:05:51,367
We've got him.
69
00:05:52,535 --> 00:05:55,287
We've got him, haven't we?
70
00:05:55,580 --> 00:05:58,082
Yes, sir.
That's one frozen stiff.
71
00:05:59,209 --> 00:06:00,334
Ahem.
72
00:06:00,877 --> 00:06:02,878
[whistling a tune]
What about that--that thing?
73
00:06:03,505 --> 00:06:05,255
No, no, no. He's not my problem now.
74
00:06:06,007 --> 00:06:07,549
If and when the project gets re-funded,
75
00:06:08,176 --> 00:06:10,719
I'll defrost him and give him
a jolt of electricity
76
00:06:11,221 --> 00:06:12,971
that'll shock the synapses
in the old noggin,
77
00:06:13,264 --> 00:06:15,557
and those enzymes
will get our buddy perking again.
78
00:06:15,558 --> 00:06:16,725
Well, what if the project
doesn't get re-funded?
79
00:06:16,726 --> 00:06:18,769
Whoa. Do not even think it.
80
00:06:19,354 --> 00:06:22,689
Now, in the meantime, we have to get
our sleeping beauty back there in limbo
81
00:06:23,149 --> 00:06:25,984
to the Winterhaven Center
for Disease Control.
82
00:06:27,278 --> 00:06:28,278
I never heard of the place.
83
00:06:28,947 --> 00:06:32,825
COL. MASTERS: Government-funded research
center in some podunk town.
84
00:06:33,243 --> 00:06:34,743
[thunder]
85
00:06:37,747 --> 00:06:41,792
MR. PROCTOR: And tomorrow, class,
I have a treat in store for you.
86
00:06:42,377 --> 00:06:46,422
We actually get to look at a cadaver
from Lee's Funeral Home.
87
00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:47,840
- Yecch!
- Come on!
88
00:06:47,882 --> 00:06:49,883
A dead body is nothing to be afraid of.
89
00:06:50,552 --> 00:06:53,804
Well now. Let's see how we're doing
with our experiments.
90
00:06:54,180 --> 00:06:59,101
Mr. Williams, I'm sure you'd be delighted
to seize this opportunity
91
00:06:59,102 --> 00:07:02,729
to elevate your perpetually
declining grade.
92
00:07:02,730 --> 00:07:04,189
Uh, of course I would, sir.
93
00:07:04,190 --> 00:07:05,190
[clears throat]
94
00:07:05,316 --> 00:07:06,316
[frog croaks]
95
00:07:07,694 --> 00:07:09,903
Mr. Proctor, fellow students.
96
00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:14,575
Direct your attention, if you would,
to the frog before me.
97
00:07:15,493 --> 00:07:18,704
Poor Benjy here is completely
without the use of his back legs.
98
00:07:18,705 --> 00:07:19,872
ALL: Aww.
99
00:07:20,665 --> 00:07:21,748
I hate it when he does this.
100
00:07:21,749 --> 00:07:23,250
Is the frog really paralyzed?
101
00:07:23,668 --> 00:07:25,878
Miss Norton, are you following
Mr. Williams' experiment?
102
00:07:26,504 --> 00:07:28,005
[Benjy croaks]
Uh, yes, sir.
103
00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:33,844
Here today I will demonstrate
the essential symbiology.
104
00:07:34,345 --> 00:07:36,430
- Symbiosis.
- Between...
105
00:07:37,515 --> 00:07:39,933
have you guessed it?
Uh, Katie.
106
00:07:40,477 --> 00:07:42,102
Between electricity and life?
107
00:07:42,645 --> 00:07:44,021
Exactly.
108
00:07:45,607 --> 00:07:46,690
- Whoa!
109
00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:48,400
I noticed.
110
00:07:49,027 --> 00:07:50,027
- Don't do that.
- Don't--
111
00:07:51,070 --> 00:07:52,070
- Aah!
- Everybody out.
112
00:07:53,448 --> 00:07:54,448
Fire!
113
00:07:56,034 --> 00:07:57,451
Good thinking, Kev.
114
00:08:01,873 --> 00:08:03,123
KEVIN:
Well, I hope you're happy.
115
00:08:03,833 --> 00:08:05,042
I thought you loved school.
116
00:08:05,418 --> 00:08:07,377
This isn't school, Steve.
This is punishment.
117
00:08:07,962 --> 00:08:09,171
All school is punishment.
118
00:08:10,798 --> 00:08:11,798
Now I'm gonna get warts.
119
00:08:12,550 --> 00:08:13,884
So you wear a glove.
120
00:08:15,553 --> 00:08:18,263
I can't believe I let you
get me in these messes.
121
00:08:18,806 --> 00:08:19,806
What messes?
122
00:08:20,391 --> 00:08:21,558
You're a straight-A student.
123
00:08:22,268 --> 00:08:24,394
Besides, if it wasn't for me,
you'd never have any fun, man.
124
00:08:24,687 --> 00:08:25,687
You call this fun?
125
00:08:26,439 --> 00:08:28,106
Hey, at least he didn't suspend us.
126
00:08:29,275 --> 00:08:31,652
Sometimes I wish my life
were just a little more boring.
127
00:08:32,362 --> 00:08:33,362
Sure you do.
128
00:08:34,072 --> 00:08:35,989
You know, I think there's hope
for you yet, man.
129
00:08:36,783 --> 00:08:38,617
Between you and me,
we can really make it out there.
130
00:08:38,993 --> 00:08:39,993
Where?
131
00:08:40,203 --> 00:08:41,203
The world, Kev!
132
00:08:41,746 --> 00:08:44,414
Once we get out of this town,
there'll be no stopping us.
133
00:08:44,582 --> 00:08:45,582
Look, one's trying to get--
134
00:08:45,959 --> 00:08:46,959
One got away!
135
00:08:47,627 --> 00:08:50,003
Think about it.
With my energy and your brains...
136
00:08:50,213 --> 00:08:52,422
the world will cower at our feet.
137
00:08:53,383 --> 00:08:54,383
Will you cut it out?
138
00:08:54,551 --> 00:08:56,343
I can't see what I'm doing.
Cut it out.
139
00:08:58,096 --> 00:08:59,221
- Ow!
- You okay?
140
00:09:01,724 --> 00:09:03,308
Yeah, yeah. I just bumped into--
141
00:09:04,227 --> 00:09:05,227
Oh, shit.
142
00:09:05,562 --> 00:09:06,728
It's Mr. Proctor's dead guy.
143
00:09:07,063 --> 00:09:08,063
Stand back, doctor.
144
00:09:08,356 --> 00:09:09,356
Code blue.
Code blue.
145
00:09:09,357 --> 00:09:10,357
Don't do that.
146
00:09:13,945 --> 00:09:15,487
- Oh...
- Shit.
147
00:09:18,032 --> 00:09:18,991
KEVIN:
What do we do now?
148
00:09:18,992 --> 00:09:19,992
Run!
149
00:09:25,540 --> 00:09:26,540
Hey, watch it!
150
00:09:27,166 --> 00:09:29,167
KEVIN: Brake!
- I don't think he can hear you, man.
151
00:09:29,168 --> 00:09:30,669
Oh he's heading for the highway
and picking up speed!
152
00:09:30,962 --> 00:09:33,672
Mr. Proctor's gonna know it was us.
He's gonna expel us.
153
00:09:34,090 --> 00:09:35,090
Or at least you.
154
00:09:35,216 --> 00:09:36,508
Come on!
Let's go!
155
00:09:45,727 --> 00:09:46,727
DRIVER: What the hell?
156
00:09:49,355 --> 00:09:50,355
Now what?
157
00:09:50,857 --> 00:09:53,025
Well, we--we got two choices here.
158
00:09:53,693 --> 00:09:54,693
I don't wanna hear this.
159
00:09:55,236 --> 00:09:56,570
We--We can just tell Mr. Proctor
160
00:09:56,571 --> 00:09:58,947
we sent his prize cadaver
north on highway 51...
161
00:09:58,948 --> 00:09:59,948
I don't wanna hear this.
162
00:10:00,950 --> 00:10:01,950
Or...
163
00:10:02,327 --> 00:10:03,577
we could find a replacement.
164
00:10:10,752 --> 00:10:13,086
[rock music playing
on car radio]
165
00:10:21,095 --> 00:10:22,804
- How's Mr. Oliver?
- Still dead, man.
166
00:10:22,805 --> 00:10:24,139
What are cops doing in a hospital?
167
00:10:24,140 --> 00:10:26,266
They're not cops, they're guards
and it's not a hospital.
168
00:10:26,517 --> 00:10:27,851
It's a disease control center.
169
00:10:27,852 --> 00:10:28,852
I knew that.
170
00:10:28,936 --> 00:10:30,270
Why don't we just tell Proctor
what happened?
171
00:10:32,106 --> 00:10:34,775
Have you no imagination?
Do you wanna flunk his class?
172
00:10:35,735 --> 00:10:36,735
Good point.
173
00:10:38,946 --> 00:10:40,489
Hey. What's that?
174
00:10:44,786 --> 00:10:47,204
Hello, beautiful.
175
00:10:47,205 --> 00:10:48,747
Doesn't he look too--
uh, too skanky?
176
00:10:49,916 --> 00:10:51,333
When you're dead,
you're skanky.
177
00:10:51,542 --> 00:10:52,542
It goes with the territory.
178
00:10:54,128 --> 00:10:55,128
Oh, yeah.
179
00:10:56,089 --> 00:10:57,964
All right. Let's just get him out
and get him dressed.
180
00:10:58,424 --> 00:10:59,466
Katie's waiting.
181
00:11:01,552 --> 00:11:03,595
Uh, since the bio lab's
gonna be locked,
182
00:11:03,930 --> 00:11:05,514
what do you say we leave him
at your house tonight, huh?
183
00:11:05,723 --> 00:11:07,307
No, and not at Katie's, either.
184
00:11:08,142 --> 00:11:10,018
You have to be the doctor.
You get the body.
185
00:11:11,562 --> 00:11:13,438
Right.
[gas escapes]
186
00:11:14,232 --> 00:11:15,607
KEVIN
God, this guy is beefy.
187
00:11:15,858 --> 00:11:18,110
KATIE: Oh great, the guy dripped
all over the back seat.
188
00:11:18,111 --> 00:11:21,196
STEVE: Ooh, he's oozing all over the place.
Slippery little devil, isn't he?
189
00:11:21,614 --> 00:11:22,614
KEVIN: Hold up your end.
190
00:11:22,782 --> 00:11:24,658
STEVE: I guess this is what they mean
by ''dead weight.''
191
00:11:25,159 --> 00:11:26,451
Ha. Right.
192
00:11:28,955 --> 00:11:29,955
KEVIN: Shh.
193
00:11:32,834 --> 00:11:35,210
[door closes]
Steven, is that you?
194
00:11:35,837 --> 00:11:36,837
Uh, yeah, Mom.
195
00:11:37,922 --> 00:11:39,673
I brought Kevin home to help me,
uh, study.
196
00:11:40,341 --> 00:11:42,509
Oh, Kevin. Come on in.
197
00:11:43,594 --> 00:11:44,594
You keep them busy.
198
00:11:44,721 --> 00:11:45,971
I'll take him to the basement.
199
00:11:50,309 --> 00:11:51,435
Honey, it's Kevin.
200
00:11:51,644 --> 00:11:53,478
Huh? Oh, hi, Kev.
How are you doin'?
201
00:11:53,646 --> 00:11:54,855
Okay. Okay. Good.
Good.
202
00:11:55,189 --> 00:11:58,233
We are watching a wonderful program
on the Alaskan wilderness.
203
00:11:59,193 --> 00:12:00,360
- Yeah.
- You know what that is?
204
00:12:00,987 --> 00:12:02,112
- Snow.
- Right.
205
00:12:03,156 --> 00:12:04,156
How 'bout those guys?
206
00:12:04,323 --> 00:12:05,323
Penguins.
207
00:12:05,491 --> 00:12:06,950
No. Those are seals.
208
00:12:07,201 --> 00:12:08,618
[barking]
209
00:12:08,870 --> 00:12:09,870
Come on, Jasper, beat it.
210
00:12:10,580 --> 00:12:11,580
Shh.
211
00:12:11,873 --> 00:12:13,081
Keep it down, will you?
212
00:12:13,458 --> 00:12:14,916
Look at that.
Know what that is?
213
00:12:15,585 --> 00:12:17,252
- No, sir.
- Salmon.
214
00:12:17,253 --> 00:12:18,962
- Salmon.
- I love salmon.
215
00:12:20,465 --> 00:12:24,384
Just wait, Jasper. Tomorrow I'm bringing a pretty little
pit bull home for you, you little maggot.
216
00:12:24,761 --> 00:12:27,053
He'll turn you into dog chow
in a minute, you little--ohh!
217
00:12:27,513 --> 00:12:28,764
[barking]
218
00:12:34,061 --> 00:12:36,229
TV: Penguins
often race among themselves.
219
00:12:36,230 --> 00:12:38,565
Oh, my goodness
isn't this a fascinating program.
220
00:12:38,900 --> 00:12:42,277
TV: Penguins are known to be able to run at speeds
up to 20 miles per hour. . .
221
00:12:42,737 --> 00:12:44,404
especially during hunting season.
222
00:12:44,614 --> 00:12:45,655
[gunshot]
Go, little guy.
223
00:12:45,656 --> 00:12:47,073
Well, you can't win them all.
224
00:12:48,201 --> 00:12:49,451
[whimpers]
225
00:12:49,452 --> 00:12:51,203
I think Jasper wants to go out.
226
00:12:51,412 --> 00:12:53,663
Don't get up. Uh, I'll let him out.
227
00:12:54,123 --> 00:12:55,957
- Well, thank you.
- Uh, thanks, Kevin.
228
00:12:57,210 --> 00:12:58,210
[grunting]
229
00:13:00,880 --> 00:13:01,880
Who's that?
230
00:13:02,215 --> 00:13:03,215
No one.
231
00:13:03,257 --> 00:13:04,257
He is too.
232
00:13:05,092 --> 00:13:06,843
[gasps]
You're having a nightmare.
233
00:13:07,011 --> 00:13:08,011
I am not.
234
00:13:08,304 --> 00:13:09,304
You are too.
235
00:13:09,514 --> 00:13:11,598
You're still in bed,
and you're having a nightmare.
236
00:13:11,849 --> 00:13:14,100
The worst kind.
The kind that can become real.
237
00:13:14,602 --> 00:13:16,686
And if you don't forget it
and get back into your room,
238
00:13:17,188 --> 00:13:19,231
this boogeyman,
who's really not here,
239
00:13:19,607 --> 00:13:21,691
will come alive
and kill you in your sleep.
240
00:13:26,322 --> 00:13:28,740
God, I'm gonna hate myself for that
when I'm an adult.
241
00:13:36,624 --> 00:13:37,749
[water splashes]
242
00:13:43,631 --> 00:13:44,631
Steve.
243
00:13:46,968 --> 00:13:47,968
Steve.
244
00:13:51,097 --> 00:13:52,639
- Where is he?
- He's in there.
245
00:13:53,015 --> 00:13:54,015
- Oh, great!
- Shh.
246
00:13:54,141 --> 00:13:55,392
Keep your voice down, man.
247
00:13:56,143 --> 00:13:57,143
What are we gonna do?
248
00:13:57,311 --> 00:14:00,230
I don't know. I don't know.
Let me think.
249
00:14:01,190 --> 00:14:03,692
Okay, we could keep him
in my room overnight.
250
00:14:03,943 --> 00:14:04,943
Now the trick is getting him out. . .
251
00:14:05,736 --> 00:14:07,362
Steven, are you through?
252
00:14:08,197 --> 00:14:09,197
Yeah, Mom.
253
00:14:09,740 --> 00:14:12,409
Well, I wanted to take my bath
before dinner, dear.
254
00:14:13,953 --> 00:14:14,953
Okay. I'll be out in a minute.
255
00:14:16,205 --> 00:14:17,163
MR. WILLIAMS:
Come quick, honey.
256
00:14:17,164 --> 00:14:18,373
The penguins are mating.
257
00:14:18,708 --> 00:14:20,792
All right, first we gotta drain that tub.
258
00:14:21,168 --> 00:14:23,461
I don't want my mother sitting
in some dead guy's bubble bath.
259
00:14:23,462 --> 00:14:24,462
Great plan.
260
00:14:24,589 --> 00:14:25,589
Hey, it's a start.
261
00:14:27,049 --> 00:14:28,049
Aah!
Aah!
262
00:14:30,136 --> 00:14:31,595
Aah!
Aah!
263
00:14:32,305 --> 00:14:33,305
Err? Err?
264
00:14:33,764 --> 00:14:37,225
Aah!
265
00:14:37,560 --> 00:14:38,935
[all stop screaming]
266
00:14:39,228 --> 00:14:40,228
Is that rigor mortis?
267
00:14:47,820 --> 00:14:48,820
[grunting]
268
00:14:49,822 --> 00:14:51,615
Raah! Err!
269
00:14:56,579 --> 00:14:59,164
Do you realize
what we have done here?
270
00:14:59,624 --> 00:15:00,749
I don't wanna think about it.
271
00:15:02,209 --> 00:15:05,086
We have discovered
the secret of life, pal.
272
00:15:05,796 --> 00:15:06,963
Oh, I think I'm gonna be sick.
273
00:15:08,799 --> 00:15:12,385
It's gotta have something to do with
the ingredients of this bubble bath
274
00:15:12,970 --> 00:15:14,095
and the electrical current.
275
00:15:15,848 --> 00:15:18,183
Kevin, if we could analyze this...
276
00:15:20,645 --> 00:15:21,645
Kevin...
277
00:15:22,730 --> 00:15:24,230
we could get an A in biology.
278
00:15:24,482 --> 00:15:25,482
What are you talking about?
279
00:15:26,025 --> 00:15:30,153
Steve, you have a live dead guy
lying in your bathroom.
280
00:15:31,280 --> 00:15:32,405
[grunting]
281
00:15:38,537 --> 00:15:40,372
Sitting in your bathroom.
282
00:15:42,166 --> 00:15:43,166
[bone cracks]
Err!
283
00:15:43,376 --> 00:15:44,417
[winces]
284
00:15:44,418 --> 00:15:45,418
This is great.
285
00:15:46,921 --> 00:15:50,131
Now, listen, we'll take our Mr. Stiff
down the back way, okay?
286
00:15:50,508 --> 00:15:51,508
We'll get him in the basement.
287
00:15:51,509 --> 00:15:52,717
It'll be a lot easier with him walking.
288
00:15:53,010 --> 00:15:54,803
- Are you serious?
- Of course I am.
289
00:15:55,304 --> 00:15:56,972
Listen, man. Listen to me.
290
00:15:57,723 --> 00:15:58,974
Go check to see if the coast is clear.
291
00:16:01,185 --> 00:16:02,268
Come on, Kevin!
292
00:16:02,603 --> 00:16:03,937
Life is an adventure, right?
293
00:16:03,938 --> 00:16:05,772
Come on. Go.
294
00:16:06,023 --> 00:16:07,273
Go, baby. Go.
295
00:16:10,111 --> 00:16:11,653
Am I having a nightmare, Kevin?
296
00:16:12,405 --> 00:16:13,405
We both are.
297
00:16:15,783 --> 00:16:16,783
[shudders]
298
00:16:16,826 --> 00:16:18,493
MR. WILLIAMS: That Eskimo
looks like he's wearing a--
299
00:16:19,412 --> 00:16:21,329
Ah ha ha!
I thought he was wearing a tuxedo.
300
00:16:22,415 --> 00:16:23,415
It's a penguin.
301
00:16:27,628 --> 00:16:28,962
[Bud grunting]
302
00:16:34,135 --> 00:16:36,594
TV: The penguins
are off to a running start...
303
00:16:45,187 --> 00:16:47,439
[grunting]
304
00:16:49,191 --> 00:16:51,609
TV: At times, they mistake
other species for their mates,
305
00:16:52,445 --> 00:16:57,782
including polar bears, walruses and other
warm-blooded mammals. . .
306
00:16:58,868 --> 00:17:00,577
especially during those long...
307
00:17:00,578 --> 00:17:01,703
You through, Steve?!
308
00:17:03,414 --> 00:17:05,415
Uh, yeah, Mom, but don't come up.
309
00:17:05,416 --> 00:17:07,375
Uh, Jasper had an accident.
We're cleaning it up.
310
00:17:08,002 --> 00:17:09,252
Who has a poodle nowadays,
anyway?
311
00:17:09,420 --> 00:17:10,420
It's almost time for dinner.
312
00:17:10,629 --> 00:17:11,796
Would Kevin like to stay?
313
00:17:12,298 --> 00:17:14,007
Come on, man.
We gotta give Katie the good news.
314
00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:15,300
What about our stiff?
315
00:17:15,593 --> 00:17:17,510
We'll only be gone 20 minutes.
What could happen?
316
00:17:20,681 --> 00:17:23,141
Uh, Mom, w-we're gonna
go have dinner with Katie.
317
00:17:23,768 --> 00:17:25,435
Well, don't stay out too late,
sweetheart.
318
00:17:25,436 --> 00:17:28,271
There's a wonderful special on TV
on the beginnings of life.
319
00:17:29,190 --> 00:17:30,190
Did you clean that stuff up?
320
00:17:30,274 --> 00:17:31,274
Yeah, Dad.
321
00:17:32,943 --> 00:17:35,028
Uh, bye, Mrs. Williams.
Bye, Mr. Williams.
322
00:17:35,404 --> 00:17:36,613
- See you, Kevin.
- Goodnight, Kevin.
323
00:17:36,614 --> 00:17:37,614
Real sorry--
324
00:17:39,533 --> 00:17:40,533
MR. WILLIAMS:
I hate dogs.
325
00:17:40,701 --> 00:17:41,910
[barks]
326
00:17:43,162 --> 00:17:44,329
What's he sorry about?
327
00:17:44,580 --> 00:17:45,580
I don't know, sweetheart.
328
00:17:45,790 --> 00:17:46,790
It's not his poodle.
329
00:17:55,424 --> 00:17:57,717
I think we should alert the media.
330
00:17:58,177 --> 00:17:59,177
I mean, we could
win a Noble for this.
331
00:17:59,512 --> 00:18:00,512
It's No-bell.
332
00:18:01,472 --> 00:18:02,472
I knew that.
333
00:18:03,599 --> 00:18:04,724
I think we should come clean,
334
00:18:05,559 --> 00:18:07,060
tell Mr. Proctor we lost his body,
335
00:18:07,228 --> 00:18:09,646
and tell somebody a-about
our friend at your house.
336
00:18:10,439 --> 00:18:13,108
Steve, something is not right.
337
00:18:15,111 --> 00:18:16,152
[growls]
[whimpers]
338
00:18:18,781 --> 00:18:20,115
So what have we got?
339
00:18:20,950 --> 00:18:23,368
Well, we have a videotape
of the kids who stole the body.
340
00:18:24,328 --> 00:18:25,787
It's probably a prank of some sort.
341
00:18:26,288 --> 00:18:27,372
- You have license plates?
- Yeah.
342
00:18:27,665 --> 00:18:29,457
Then we should have no problem
tracking them down...
343
00:18:31,043 --> 00:18:32,043
hopefully.
344
00:18:33,546 --> 00:18:36,339
What is the, uh,
worst-case scenario?
345
00:18:37,466 --> 00:18:38,925
Well, if the body's recovered--
346
00:18:39,093 --> 00:18:40,718
I asked for the worst case,
347
00:18:41,637 --> 00:18:42,595
not a Smurf story.
348
00:18:42,596 --> 00:18:43,596
Worst case?
349
00:18:44,640 --> 00:18:48,184
The body is somehow reanimated
and turns on its captors.
350
00:18:49,520 --> 00:18:52,438
Jasper, puppy, puppy, puppy,
num-num.
351
00:18:56,819 --> 00:18:58,278
[grunting]
352
00:19:00,948 --> 00:19:02,031
Sally!
353
00:19:03,617 --> 00:19:06,327
You know, Steve got cut from the team
because of academic probation
354
00:19:06,662 --> 00:19:07,996
[Bud sobs]
- I didn't know that.
355
00:19:09,540 --> 00:19:13,293
DISPATCH: Attention, all units,
we have a 1-7-6-2-3-9...
356
00:19:14,420 --> 00:19:15,420
Hey.
357
00:19:15,546 --> 00:19:16,546
Hey.
358
00:19:16,672 --> 00:19:17,672
Do we have news for you.
359
00:19:18,007 --> 00:19:19,007
- What's that?
- Steve. . .
360
00:19:19,466 --> 00:19:21,426
DISPATCH:
No, it's a 4-0-9-7...
361
00:19:22,928 --> 00:19:25,180
[grunting]
362
00:19:25,181 --> 00:19:28,183
How does he expect to go
into construction if he has no follow-through?
363
00:19:29,018 --> 00:19:30,101
Honey, maybe he'll grow out of it.
364
00:19:30,311 --> 00:19:31,895
You're going to ruin your digestion.
365
00:19:32,146 --> 00:19:33,146
Yeah, well...
366
00:19:33,772 --> 00:19:36,149
I'll tell you, one more bad grade
and I'm grounding him.
367
00:19:36,609 --> 00:19:37,609
[disgusted grunt]
368
00:19:38,569 --> 00:19:40,153
It's only broccoli, sweetheart.
369
00:19:40,529 --> 00:19:42,071
Oh. I was wondering what it was.
370
00:19:42,823 --> 00:19:44,240
[grunting]
371
00:19:44,617 --> 00:19:46,326
[Jasper barks]
372
00:19:47,036 --> 00:19:48,036
Meat.
373
00:19:49,830 --> 00:19:51,122
There's meatloaf on your plate.
374
00:19:51,790 --> 00:19:52,790
I know that.
375
00:19:53,334 --> 00:19:54,375
[barking]
376
00:19:56,545 --> 00:19:57,837
[grunting]
377
00:20:19,401 --> 00:20:20,360
[flushes]
378
00:20:20,361 --> 00:20:22,070
Ahh! Ahh ahh ahh.
379
00:20:24,156 --> 00:20:25,156
Err?
380
00:20:28,327 --> 00:20:29,327
Ah.
381
00:20:38,337 --> 00:20:39,337
Now, this Kevin, you know,
382
00:20:39,964 --> 00:20:43,174
he's a little bit of a wimp
with his hands, but he thinks things through.
383
00:20:43,175 --> 00:20:45,051
I like that, maybe some of that'll
rub off on Steve.
384
00:20:45,844 --> 00:20:49,847
Well, maybe Steven doesn't
wanna go into construction.
385
00:20:49,848 --> 00:20:50,848
What?
386
00:20:51,517 --> 00:20:52,934
It's a family tradition.
387
00:20:53,686 --> 00:20:55,603
I brought that kid into this world.
I can take him out of it.
388
00:20:59,358 --> 00:21:00,733
[grunting]
389
00:21:01,986 --> 00:21:03,194
[playful squeal]
390
00:21:07,992 --> 00:21:09,575
[gasps, growling]
391
00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:21,504
Ehh. Ehh?
392
00:21:34,435 --> 00:21:35,435
[barks]
393
00:21:38,522 --> 00:21:39,522
Meat.
394
00:21:40,149 --> 00:21:41,149
[barking]
395
00:21:45,446 --> 00:21:46,779
Oh, did you try the wine,
sweetheart?
396
00:21:46,947 --> 00:21:47,947
Yeah.
397
00:21:48,449 --> 00:21:50,033
It's an award-winning wine
from Wisconsin.
398
00:21:51,577 --> 00:21:52,577
Delicious.
399
00:21:53,203 --> 00:21:54,370
[sniffing]
400
00:21:57,082 --> 00:21:58,249
[whimpers]
401
00:22:27,780 --> 00:22:29,072
[growling]
402
00:22:41,752 --> 00:22:43,336
[sighs]
403
00:22:45,839 --> 00:22:46,839
[arf]
404
00:22:51,345 --> 00:22:53,179
- [arf arf]
- Meat.
405
00:22:53,764 --> 00:22:56,057
You know, I bet we all get some kind
of special achievement award
406
00:22:56,058 --> 00:22:57,058
for this, or something.
407
00:22:57,893 --> 00:22:58,893
I don't think you should get involved.
408
00:22:59,812 --> 00:23:00,812
Why not?
409
00:23:02,231 --> 00:23:04,023
Because it could be dangerous,
and because--
410
00:23:04,024 --> 00:23:05,191
Because I'm a girl.
411
00:23:05,984 --> 00:23:07,610
God, you guys really kill me.
412
00:23:08,654 --> 00:23:10,154
Let me see if I've got this right, Kev.
413
00:23:10,155 --> 00:23:11,948
Because I'm a girl,
I'm supposed to just back off
414
00:23:11,949 --> 00:23:13,199
and watch you guys have all the fun?
415
00:23:13,700 --> 00:23:14,867
Maybe just cheer you on?
416
00:23:15,953 --> 00:23:17,620
Hang on.
I'll go get my pompoms.
417
00:23:21,625 --> 00:23:24,043
You know, Kevin, you--you have
a definite way with women.
418
00:23:24,044 --> 00:23:26,087
A certain je ne sais quoi.
419
00:23:26,755 --> 00:23:27,880
I'm just trying
to keep her out of it.
420
00:23:28,424 --> 00:23:30,550
Why? We've been together
since we were kids.
421
00:23:31,176 --> 00:23:32,427
One for all, all for one, right?
422
00:23:33,804 --> 00:23:34,804
Pay that.
423
00:23:36,682 --> 00:23:38,891
Because I like her a lot.
424
00:23:43,647 --> 00:23:44,689
[whimpers]
425
00:23:46,191 --> 00:23:47,608
[sniffing]
426
00:23:51,697 --> 00:23:53,030
How many times do I have to call her?
427
00:23:53,490 --> 00:23:55,783
Sally! Your dinner's getting cold!
428
00:24:03,417 --> 00:24:04,375
[splashing]
429
00:24:04,376 --> 00:24:05,460
Oh, great.
430
00:24:07,546 --> 00:24:08,588
Wade!
431
00:24:09,131 --> 00:24:13,217
The toilet's overflowing!
It's ruining my mudpack!
432
00:24:14,511 --> 00:24:15,470
MR. WILLIAMS: Oh, God.
433
00:24:15,471 --> 00:24:18,181
Don't tell me Sally's been flushing
her toys down the toilet again.
434
00:24:25,439 --> 00:24:28,733
My mother never used mudpacks
and beauty creams when I was a kid.
435
00:24:29,443 --> 00:24:32,195
Your mother looked like Humphrey Bogart.
436
00:24:33,739 --> 00:24:35,239
My mother never smoked
a cigarette in her life.
437
00:24:36,116 --> 00:24:37,200
[whimpers]
438
00:24:38,118 --> 00:24:39,327
[grunting]
439
00:24:40,746 --> 00:24:41,954
[barking]
440
00:24:43,540 --> 00:24:44,749
[Bud growling]
441
00:24:48,795 --> 00:24:50,588
[chomp]
[Jasper howls]
442
00:24:51,715 --> 00:24:53,257
[Bud gulps, sighs]
443
00:24:53,258 --> 00:24:54,258
Good doggie.
444
00:25:04,895 --> 00:25:06,521
[growling]
445
00:25:07,523 --> 00:25:09,482
Suppose the C.H.U.D.s
don't kill their victims.
446
00:25:09,691 --> 00:25:11,567
Suppose they just...nibble.
447
00:25:11,568 --> 00:25:12,568
It doesn't matter.
448
00:25:12,945 --> 00:25:14,987
Once the enzyme's
introduced into the brain--
449
00:25:14,988 --> 00:25:17,573
and believe me, they like to get
their teeth into grey matter.
450
00:25:17,741 --> 00:25:18,741
Sort of like caviar--
451
00:25:19,409 --> 00:25:20,660
Normal life ceases.
452
00:25:21,036 --> 00:25:22,453
The C.H.U.D.ified brain, however,
453
00:25:22,454 --> 00:25:24,789
lurches into a second life,
an uncontrolled life.
454
00:25:25,916 --> 00:25:27,959
So what you're saying basically is. . .
455
00:25:28,210 --> 00:25:29,794
In a very real sense,
456
00:25:30,170 --> 00:25:32,755
C.H.U.D.ism is a disease
that cannot be stopped.
457
00:25:33,048 --> 00:25:34,215
A plague if you will.
458
00:25:35,050 --> 00:25:36,592
Well, there goes
your perfect soldier theory.
459
00:25:38,262 --> 00:25:40,012
Well then we just
fry the bastards' brains, huh?
460
00:25:40,430 --> 00:25:43,015
Ha ha ha! We'll just bring some more
of those boys down here
461
00:25:43,016 --> 00:25:45,726
and have ourselves
a bar-be-cue, hmm? Huh?
462
00:25:46,061 --> 00:25:47,645
Ha ha! Ha!
463
00:25:49,606 --> 00:25:52,191
Get in.
DISPATCH: 6-9-2-2-4-9-7.
464
00:25:54,152 --> 00:25:55,486
- What's wrong?
- Shh. Listen.
465
00:25:55,487 --> 00:25:57,613
DISPATCH: Three kids from the Winterhaven
Disease Control Center.
466
00:25:58,156 --> 00:26:00,950
Keep your eyes open.
We got an APB out on them, over.
467
00:26:01,493 --> 00:26:02,493
Do they mention us?
468
00:26:02,661 --> 00:26:04,036
No, but they described my car.
469
00:26:04,538 --> 00:26:05,538
Well, we'll walk to school.
470
00:26:05,872 --> 00:26:07,331
They described her car, Steve.
471
00:26:07,332 --> 00:26:09,000
Then they probably have
the license plate number.
472
00:26:09,751 --> 00:26:10,751
So?
473
00:26:11,295 --> 00:26:12,712
So then they have Katie's name.
474
00:26:12,713 --> 00:26:13,796
My parents are gonna love this.
475
00:26:14,214 --> 00:26:15,715
B in biology,
C in history,
476
00:26:15,716 --> 00:26:16,882
and A in body snatching.
477
00:26:18,093 --> 00:26:20,303
Look, can your mom
use your car, you use hers?
478
00:26:20,304 --> 00:26:21,304
Yeah, I guess.
479
00:26:21,305 --> 00:26:23,431
So here's what we do.
We go back to my house.
480
00:26:23,932 --> 00:26:25,349
We put the stiff in some clothes.
481
00:26:25,684 --> 00:26:27,935
We barge in on the nearest
television station
482
00:26:27,936 --> 00:26:30,855
and bask in the glory
of instant fame and fortune.
483
00:26:31,523 --> 00:26:32,690
[both laugh]
484
00:26:43,702 --> 00:26:44,744
Looks like he tried to get away.
485
00:26:46,955 --> 00:26:48,539
[sighs]
486
00:26:48,749 --> 00:26:50,333
Steve, are you sure about all this?
487
00:26:51,043 --> 00:26:52,043
Absolutely.
488
00:26:54,254 --> 00:26:55,254
[growling]
489
00:27:01,928 --> 00:27:03,763
STEVE:
Here, stiffy, stiff, stiff, stiff.
490
00:27:04,640 --> 00:27:06,349
Here, stiffy, stiff, stiff.
491
00:27:06,350 --> 00:27:07,350
Come on out.
492
00:27:07,934 --> 00:27:10,019
It's time to make your TV debut.
493
00:27:10,812 --> 00:27:12,730
KATIE: Steve, please tell me
your dog has asthma.
494
00:27:13,315 --> 00:27:14,315
[growls]
495
00:27:14,983 --> 00:27:16,192
We don't want to cause panic.
496
00:27:16,860 --> 00:27:18,653
Now we know what
we're up against here.
497
00:27:18,654 --> 00:27:19,945
All we have to do is, uh,
498
00:27:20,322 --> 00:27:23,074
pick up those punk kids
and get Bud back.
499
00:27:23,784 --> 00:27:24,784
Bud?
500
00:27:25,327 --> 00:27:26,327
Bud, the C.H.U.D.
501
00:27:27,537 --> 00:27:29,080
It's Mr. Oliver's nickname.
502
00:27:41,677 --> 00:27:44,136
TV, faint:
Let's go, girls. Come on.
503
00:27:46,598 --> 00:27:47,598
Come on.
504
00:27:50,227 --> 00:27:51,394
Side to side, girls. Good.
505
00:27:52,270 --> 00:27:53,729
Good. Keep it up.
506
00:28:01,780 --> 00:28:05,908
Burn, burn, burn that fat away.
That's good, girls.
507
00:28:06,201 --> 00:28:08,869
Oh, you have never seen an ounce
of fat on your own body
508
00:28:08,870 --> 00:28:11,497
You little neo-nazi anorexic
leotard slut.
509
00:28:11,832 --> 00:28:12,832
TV: That's good.
510
00:28:13,291 --> 00:28:15,459
And knees.
Get 'em up, up, up, girls.
511
00:28:16,002 --> 00:28:18,921
We work out like this
'cause it makes us feel so good.
512
00:28:19,172 --> 00:28:21,799
Really? [laughs]
Well, we work out
513
00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:25,261
because we eat like a bull moose
and drink like orca, the killer whale.
514
00:28:26,138 --> 00:28:27,555
TV: Now the elbows.
515
00:28:27,931 --> 00:28:30,224
[cat yowls, clang]
516
00:28:30,559 --> 00:28:32,143
Jogger, kitty, kitty,
is that you?
517
00:28:35,605 --> 00:28:36,605
5 more minutes of this,
518
00:28:37,107 --> 00:28:39,650
I can have a cigarette
and order a pizza.
519
00:28:40,902 --> 00:28:43,362
Oh, hell with it.
I'm gonna smoke now. Yes.
520
00:28:43,780 --> 00:28:45,656
1, 2, 3.
521
00:28:45,866 --> 00:28:48,117
Mommy's coming, Jogger.
We're gonna have some din-din.
522
00:28:48,118 --> 00:28:50,619
Kitty, kitty, kitty.
[grunting]
523
00:28:51,163 --> 00:28:54,206
Dinnertime, you and me.
Big date.
524
00:28:55,792 --> 00:28:58,210
Listen for this noise.
I know you'll come home for this.
525
00:28:58,503 --> 00:28:59,754
You know that sound, don't you?
526
00:28:59,755 --> 00:29:01,172
Num, num, num, num, num.
527
00:29:01,715 --> 00:29:03,507
You and me, another night.
528
00:29:03,884 --> 00:29:05,426
Come on. Kitty, kitty.
529
00:29:05,427 --> 00:29:06,427
Brunch.
530
00:29:08,346 --> 00:29:09,930
Jogger.
Kitty, kitty, kitty.
531
00:29:11,224 --> 00:29:12,308
Here's your feast.
532
00:29:14,102 --> 00:29:15,186
[grunting]
533
00:29:15,812 --> 00:29:17,521
Oh, my.
534
00:29:18,398 --> 00:29:19,940
What big feet you have.
535
00:29:21,026 --> 00:29:22,026
Oh, my.
536
00:29:22,778 --> 00:29:24,195
What big thumbs you have.
537
00:29:28,909 --> 00:29:29,992
Do you live in the neighborhood?
538
00:29:31,620 --> 00:29:33,329
Are you heterosexual?
Heh heh heh.
539
00:29:35,332 --> 00:29:36,457
Do you have a job?
540
00:29:38,168 --> 00:29:39,168
Well, what's your name?
541
00:29:39,586 --> 00:29:40,586
Uh...
542
00:29:40,670 --> 00:29:41,670
Oh.
543
00:29:43,215 --> 00:29:44,215
Bud.
544
00:29:46,218 --> 00:29:47,218
Uhh.
545
00:29:48,720 --> 00:29:49,929
[screaming]
546
00:29:51,181 --> 00:29:52,181
Raah!
547
00:29:55,352 --> 00:29:56,519
[chomp]
548
00:29:56,812 --> 00:29:58,062
[gobbles]
549
00:30:03,360 --> 00:30:04,401
[sighs]
550
00:30:06,613 --> 00:30:08,030
[tunes radio stations]
551
00:30:08,031 --> 00:30:09,323
WOMAN: In other news,
a rabid French poodle
552
00:30:09,324 --> 00:30:11,492
has been stalking the suburban
Winterhaven area.
553
00:30:12,577 --> 00:30:13,577
On the nuclear front...
554
00:30:18,375 --> 00:30:19,375
[sniffs]
555
00:30:20,669 --> 00:30:21,669
Yech.
556
00:30:22,796 --> 00:30:23,796
Jogger.
557
00:30:25,006 --> 00:30:26,006
Dinnertime.
558
00:30:29,302 --> 00:30:30,344
The hell with all of you!
559
00:30:33,139 --> 00:30:34,682
This is the worst day of my life.
560
00:30:46,778 --> 00:30:47,945
Wife left me...
561
00:30:48,113 --> 00:30:49,947
of course, that's not so bad.
562
00:30:50,532 --> 00:30:51,824
At least I've got my health.
563
00:31:01,543 --> 00:31:03,377
Hey, buddy, this is not your bar,
564
00:31:03,378 --> 00:31:04,587
[growling]
Okay? ?comprende?
565
00:31:04,963 --> 00:31:06,422
- Aah!
- [chomp]
566
00:31:16,182 --> 00:31:17,391
# I'm a-walkin' #
567
00:31:18,310 --> 00:31:19,435
# I'm a-talkin' #
568
00:31:20,270 --> 00:31:21,312
# I'm a-stalkin' #
569
00:31:21,646 --> 00:31:23,397
# comin' to your room tonight #
570
00:31:24,065 --> 00:31:25,190
# I will find you #
571
00:31:25,901 --> 00:31:27,151
# Shadows blind you #
572
00:31:27,903 --> 00:31:29,111
# Close behind you #
573
00:31:29,321 --> 00:31:31,113
# Comin' over for a bite #
574
00:31:33,033 --> 00:31:34,033
[hiccups]
575
00:31:35,201 --> 00:31:36,285
# Bud the C.H.U.D. #
576
00:31:38,079 --> 00:31:40,289
[yawning] Listen, I can't keep
my eyes open anymore.
577
00:31:40,624 --> 00:31:41,624
Me, either.
578
00:31:44,586 --> 00:31:46,921
I say we give up, turn ourselves in.
579
00:31:47,881 --> 00:31:50,925
What? And let someone else
go down in the anals of history?
580
00:31:51,468 --> 00:31:53,093
Annals.
Annals of history.
581
00:31:53,094 --> 00:31:54,053
I knew that.
582
00:31:54,054 --> 00:31:55,846
KATIE: We'll just continue the search
in the morning, okay?
583
00:31:57,057 --> 00:31:58,474
[birds chirping]
584
00:32:00,393 --> 00:32:01,393
It's cute, isn't it?
585
00:32:01,394 --> 00:32:02,645
$4.00 for that? Hm.
586
00:32:03,939 --> 00:32:06,273
Well, that's something I got for Sally.
It's Halloween tonight.
587
00:32:06,274 --> 00:32:07,232
Oh, yeah.
588
00:32:07,233 --> 00:32:09,026
[mailman whistling]
What's she gonna be?
589
00:32:09,027 --> 00:32:10,361
She wanted to be a bee.
590
00:32:10,695 --> 00:32:11,862
Ah. Heh.
591
00:32:13,740 --> 00:32:14,740
[Jasper growls]
592
00:32:14,866 --> 00:32:16,033
Candy-ass little poodle.
593
00:32:16,952 --> 00:32:18,577
MRS. WILLIAMS:
Honey, pass me the fashion section.
594
00:32:18,578 --> 00:32:19,578
Here you go.
595
00:32:21,414 --> 00:32:22,373
[growling]
596
00:32:22,374 --> 00:32:24,083
Yeah, nice haircut.
597
00:32:24,501 --> 00:32:25,668
[growling]
598
00:32:26,753 --> 00:32:27,753
Easy, boy.
599
00:32:28,171 --> 00:32:29,171
Now, easy, doggie.
600
00:32:29,255 --> 00:32:30,255
Nice doggie.
601
00:32:30,757 --> 00:32:31,757
What kind of a bee
does she wanna be?
602
00:32:32,467 --> 00:32:34,218
- A killer bee.
- That's cute.
603
00:32:34,844 --> 00:32:36,887
You know, I wonder what I should
wear to Mary's party tonight.
604
00:32:36,888 --> 00:32:37,888
Can I have some syrup?
[growling]
605
00:32:38,890 --> 00:32:39,890
MAILMAN: Aah!
606
00:32:40,183 --> 00:32:41,809
I don't know, honey.
You like this dress?
607
00:32:41,810 --> 00:32:42,810
I hate it.
608
00:32:44,187 --> 00:32:45,187
Thanks.
609
00:32:45,647 --> 00:32:47,356
See, there's no fruit in this.
610
00:32:47,732 --> 00:32:50,150
Aah! Aah!
611
00:32:50,777 --> 00:32:51,735
What are those?
612
00:32:51,736 --> 00:32:53,195
Prunes, honey.
They're good for you.
613
00:32:53,196 --> 00:32:54,196
They look like olives.
614
00:32:55,115 --> 00:32:57,074
Hi, honey.
Mailman come yet?
615
00:32:57,784 --> 00:32:58,784
He's gone.
616
00:33:02,414 --> 00:33:03,622
[snarling]
617
00:33:08,253 --> 00:33:09,253
Prune has a pit in it.
618
00:33:09,671 --> 00:33:10,671
[tires skid]
619
00:33:15,135 --> 00:33:16,552
KEVIN: I don't believe this.
My whole life--
620
00:33:17,303 --> 00:33:18,262
KATIE: Kevin, shut up.
621
00:33:18,263 --> 00:33:19,263
KEVIN: Ruined.
622
00:33:25,228 --> 00:33:26,311
Aren't you guys
supposed to be in school?
623
00:33:26,813 --> 00:33:27,896
- Fire drill.
- Bomb scare.
624
00:33:32,944 --> 00:33:33,944
Oh.
625
00:33:34,320 --> 00:33:35,863
You're not dreaming, sweetheart.
626
00:33:36,031 --> 00:33:38,699
You're awake. See? We're walking
down the stairs together, right?
627
00:33:39,868 --> 00:33:40,868
School holiday?
628
00:33:41,953 --> 00:33:42,953
The plumbing broke down.
629
00:33:43,204 --> 00:33:44,955
We had the same problem here
last night.
630
00:33:45,415 --> 00:33:46,415
Mom.
631
00:33:47,292 --> 00:33:48,333
Steven.
632
00:33:48,334 --> 00:33:49,293
Mom.
633
00:33:49,294 --> 00:33:50,794
That's your fourth doughnut.
634
00:33:50,795 --> 00:33:53,130
Sixth, but who's counting.
Let's go find that corpse.
635
00:33:53,381 --> 00:33:54,590
[tires skidding]
636
00:34:04,601 --> 00:34:05,601
Expecting an invasion?
637
00:34:05,977 --> 00:34:06,977
Shit.
638
00:34:14,444 --> 00:34:15,444
[doorbell]
639
00:34:16,821 --> 00:34:17,821
Hi.
640
00:34:18,073 --> 00:34:19,031
Good morning, Mrs. Williams.
641
00:34:19,032 --> 00:34:21,408
This is Colonel Ted Masters
and I'm Colin Graves.
642
00:34:21,618 --> 00:34:23,952
We're from the government,
and we were wondering
643
00:34:23,953 --> 00:34:25,329
if we could speak
to your son, Steve.
644
00:34:25,747 --> 00:34:28,624
Oh, my. Uh, Steven!
645
00:34:31,169 --> 00:34:32,336
Steven!
646
00:34:32,629 --> 00:34:34,463
Well, I think he's probably
already gone to school.
647
00:34:34,464 --> 00:34:35,756
Is he in some kind of trouble?
648
00:34:36,341 --> 00:34:38,342
You can say that again,
and he's not in school.
649
00:34:38,968 --> 00:34:40,552
Now, if you see him,
you just tell him from me,
650
00:34:40,553 --> 00:34:42,930
that he's dead meat.
651
00:34:44,599 --> 00:34:45,808
Well, isn't that a little harsh?
652
00:34:47,018 --> 00:34:49,353
Yes, uh, ma'am, it seems
that he and some friends
653
00:34:49,354 --> 00:34:52,189
have stolen some government property from a top
secret installation and we were just--
654
00:34:52,190 --> 00:34:53,190
That's enough, Graves.
655
00:34:54,275 --> 00:34:56,276
Just tell him to return
my merchandise.
656
00:34:57,112 --> 00:34:58,112
Ma'am.
[stomps]
657
00:35:01,616 --> 00:35:02,783
MRS. WILLIAMS: Government property?
658
00:35:02,784 --> 00:35:03,784
Top-Secret?
659
00:35:04,244 --> 00:35:05,244
Dead meat?
660
00:35:06,329 --> 00:35:07,746
[tires skidding]
661
00:35:15,255 --> 00:35:16,922
KEVIN: That military guy
sounded serious, Steve.
662
00:35:17,173 --> 00:35:19,174
So let's get serious
and find our stiff.
663
00:35:19,175 --> 00:35:20,134
But where?
664
00:35:20,135 --> 00:35:21,218
KATIE: We'll start downtown.
665
00:35:21,636 --> 00:35:22,845
Right.
666
00:35:27,642 --> 00:35:28,642
[sighs]
667
00:35:30,270 --> 00:35:31,270
Uhh!
668
00:35:41,781 --> 00:35:42,781
Nice cut.
669
00:35:43,658 --> 00:35:44,658
[sniffs]
670
00:35:45,368 --> 00:35:46,410
[sighs]
671
00:35:47,829 --> 00:35:48,912
[tires skidding]
672
00:35:50,623 --> 00:35:51,915
Ohh. Ohh.
673
00:35:53,168 --> 00:35:54,334
[rats squeaking]
674
00:35:56,671 --> 00:35:57,671
STEVE: Rats.
675
00:35:57,881 --> 00:35:59,381
Look, how much trouble do you think
we can get in?
676
00:35:59,382 --> 00:36:01,425
I mean, it's not like
we kidnapped anybody, right?
677
00:36:01,926 --> 00:36:04,469
I'm not up on the penalty
for snatching top-secret bodies.
678
00:36:04,470 --> 00:36:05,429
Be serious.
679
00:36:05,430 --> 00:36:07,222
Hey, hey, hey,
lighten up, will ya?
680
00:36:07,223 --> 00:36:08,807
We'll find the guy.
681
00:36:09,434 --> 00:36:11,226
I mean it's not like he's
gonna blend in with the crowd.
682
00:36:12,478 --> 00:36:14,146
You know, in my day,
if I cut school,
683
00:36:14,898 --> 00:36:18,192
my father would have
taken me to the woodshed.
684
00:36:18,193 --> 00:36:19,151
You better believe it.
685
00:36:19,152 --> 00:36:20,110
Excuse me, sir.
686
00:36:20,111 --> 00:36:21,111
They don't have woodsheds
anymore.
687
00:36:21,571 --> 00:36:23,405
Well that's beside the point.
Keep looking.
688
00:36:25,950 --> 00:36:27,201
KEVIN: Are you going to
the Halloween dance tonight?
689
00:36:27,994 --> 00:36:29,494
Yeah, sure, if we're not in jail.
690
00:36:30,538 --> 00:36:31,538
KEVIN: With who?
691
00:36:32,040 --> 00:36:33,999
With myself. Come on, Kev.
692
00:36:35,793 --> 00:36:37,127
[sighs] Well, I was just wondering
693
00:36:37,128 --> 00:36:38,253
if you need an escort--
694
00:36:38,588 --> 00:36:39,963
Now, if I was a dead guy--
695
00:36:40,757 --> 00:36:42,466
Where would you go
if you were a dead guy?
696
00:36:42,926 --> 00:36:44,635
KATIE: I don't know.
A Grateful Dead concert.
697
00:36:44,928 --> 00:36:46,637
[sarcastic laugh]
698
00:36:46,638 --> 00:36:47,638
Shut up.
699
00:36:47,764 --> 00:36:48,764
If you need an escort...
700
00:36:49,682 --> 00:36:51,141
Kev, I just thought we'd all
go together.
701
00:37:00,652 --> 00:37:01,944
[sighs]
702
00:37:08,326 --> 00:37:09,326
[crack]
703
00:37:11,079 --> 00:37:12,746
[growls]
[splashing]
704
00:37:14,791 --> 00:37:16,416
KATIE: What if we don't
get the body back on time?
705
00:37:17,210 --> 00:37:18,585
STEVE: Proctor's
gonna kiss our butts
706
00:37:18,753 --> 00:37:20,045
when he finds out
what we've done.
707
00:37:20,964 --> 00:37:22,005
[hisses]
708
00:37:22,215 --> 00:37:23,257
Sorry.
709
00:37:23,258 --> 00:37:25,092
My God.
She looked really weird.
710
00:37:25,093 --> 00:37:26,260
It's those health food freaks.
711
00:37:27,512 --> 00:37:29,263
She probably doesn't
have enough meat in her diet.
712
00:37:29,889 --> 00:37:30,931
Speaking of meat...
713
00:37:33,059 --> 00:37:34,685
Oh, no. Are we going
to Bossy's again?
714
00:37:35,979 --> 00:37:37,104
How's business, Don?
715
00:37:37,563 --> 00:37:39,231
First customer.
716
00:37:39,440 --> 00:37:40,440
Oh, really?
717
00:37:41,567 --> 00:37:43,694
I don't know. I guess people'd
rather go out to the mall now
718
00:37:43,695 --> 00:37:47,781
and pay $14, $15 for one of those moussed-up,
styled hair jobs than to come downtown,
719
00:37:47,782 --> 00:37:49,449
and people are afraid
to come downtown.
720
00:37:50,368 --> 00:37:52,577
Shoot. I remember
when folks used to sleep
721
00:37:52,578 --> 00:37:54,037
with their doors unlocked
around here.
722
00:37:54,038 --> 00:37:55,038
Remember that?
723
00:37:55,498 --> 00:37:56,999
- No.
- Yeah.
724
00:37:57,000 --> 00:37:58,959
Yeah, folks could leave
their keys in the car,
725
00:37:59,210 --> 00:38:00,794
sometimes with the engine running.
726
00:38:02,088 --> 00:38:03,672
You givin' razor cuts now, Don?
727
00:38:04,132 --> 00:38:05,173
That's very progressive.
728
00:38:05,591 --> 00:38:06,883
I could take a fashion risk.
729
00:38:08,052 --> 00:38:09,052
Yeah.
730
00:38:09,595 --> 00:38:11,054
You know, I can remember
when my daddy
731
00:38:11,055 --> 00:38:12,806
used to take all of our
valuable possessions
732
00:38:12,807 --> 00:38:15,058
and he'd put 'em out
in the street every night
733
00:38:15,059 --> 00:38:16,101
before he went to sleep.
734
00:38:16,102 --> 00:38:17,352
They'd be there the next morning.
735
00:38:18,271 --> 00:38:21,231
[sighs] You don't talk to strangers
nowadays, neither. No, sir.
736
00:38:22,066 --> 00:38:23,525
I believe if a stranger
pulled up beside me
737
00:38:23,526 --> 00:38:26,695
in car right now and asked me
to climb inside, I don't think I'd do it.
738
00:38:27,739 --> 00:38:29,364
Unless he had really good candy,
739
00:38:30,616 --> 00:38:34,077
like the pecan logs
or those red licorice whips.
740
00:38:34,329 --> 00:38:35,537
Boy, those things
are good, aren't they?
741
00:38:35,538 --> 00:38:37,289
Hot, juicy--ahh!
742
00:38:37,874 --> 00:38:39,041
[chomp]
743
00:38:48,384 --> 00:38:50,802
Now, in my day,
if I stole a corpse,
744
00:38:51,429 --> 00:38:52,429
my father...
745
00:38:53,639 --> 00:38:54,723
GRAVES:
What the hell is that?
746
00:38:56,309 --> 00:38:59,853
Oh, the just the goddamnedest
ugliest-looking barber in the world.
747
00:39:01,439 --> 00:39:04,691
Like I said, kids have to be taught
respect for authority.
748
00:39:13,242 --> 00:39:14,201
Who wants burgers?
749
00:39:14,202 --> 00:39:15,160
BOTH: I do. I do.
750
00:39:15,161 --> 00:39:17,496
I got a bronco, a bowser,
a boffo, and two babies.
751
00:39:21,834 --> 00:39:23,126
[groaning]
752
00:39:31,677 --> 00:39:32,719
Did you check those guys out?
753
00:39:32,720 --> 00:39:34,304
I'll never complain about my skin again.
754
00:39:35,556 --> 00:39:37,015
[groaning]
755
00:39:40,061 --> 00:39:41,061
What'll it be, folks?
756
00:39:41,687 --> 00:39:42,979
[confused grunts]
757
00:39:43,231 --> 00:39:44,231
Meat!
Meat!
758
00:39:44,649 --> 00:39:47,359
Heh. Yeah, well, we have a variety
of burgers here at Bossy's.
759
00:39:48,152 --> 00:39:49,194
Just let me know
what kind of meat you want.
760
00:39:49,904 --> 00:39:52,406
Baby, binge,
bouncy, bodacious.
761
00:39:55,243 --> 00:39:56,660
Bobby!
Bobby!
762
00:39:56,661 --> 00:39:57,911
[all growl]
763
00:39:58,871 --> 00:40:00,288
Now, this is what
I call health food.
764
00:40:02,583 --> 00:40:04,000
Dude, you're dripping
on your chest.
765
00:40:04,252 --> 00:40:05,252
STEVE:
It's genetic, babe.
766
00:40:05,503 --> 00:40:06,503
Where's my fries?
767
00:40:06,921 --> 00:40:07,921
[C.H.U.D.s clamoring]
768
00:40:07,922 --> 00:40:08,839
KEVIN: Holy cow.
769
00:40:08,840 --> 00:40:09,798
STEVE: What? What?
770
00:40:09,799 --> 00:40:10,882
KATIE:
What? What's the matter?
771
00:40:11,509 --> 00:40:13,468
Nothing, I was just thinking
about Proctor's class.
772
00:40:14,345 --> 00:40:16,054
He's gonna have us
in detention for--
773
00:40:16,055 --> 00:40:18,014
No. He's gonna kill us for losing
that body.
774
00:40:19,225 --> 00:40:22,436
STEVE: Check it out. Those deadheads
chowed down mighty quickly.
775
00:40:24,313 --> 00:40:25,605
[groaning]
776
00:40:26,983 --> 00:40:27,941
Uhh.
777
00:40:27,942 --> 00:40:29,067
KATIE:
Kevin, you worry too much.
778
00:40:29,444 --> 00:40:30,485
STEVE: Yeah, we'll find him.
779
00:40:31,654 --> 00:40:32,654
That's him!
780
00:40:33,948 --> 00:40:34,906
That's him!
781
00:40:34,907 --> 00:40:35,907
Follow that stiff.
782
00:40:45,626 --> 00:40:46,710
No more woodsheds, eh?
783
00:40:47,670 --> 00:40:48,670
No, sir.
784
00:40:49,672 --> 00:40:50,922
[groans]
785
00:40:52,133 --> 00:40:53,175
Lunch, gentlemen?
786
00:40:53,885 --> 00:40:55,010
All right, Sam.
787
00:41:02,143 --> 00:41:05,812
COL. MASTERS: I can't believe that we
can't find them in a town this size.
788
00:41:05,813 --> 00:41:07,439
Maybe we should just let
the local police know.
789
00:41:08,900 --> 00:41:11,485
Oh, right, right, right,
and let the whole world know
790
00:41:11,486 --> 00:41:14,779
about our illegal,
neurotoxic experiments?
791
00:41:14,989 --> 00:41:15,989
Illegal?
792
00:41:16,073 --> 00:41:19,784
Well, technically those pursuits
were outlawed by the Geneva Convention
793
00:41:19,785 --> 00:41:23,455
although back then, they were mainly
talking about gas and germ warfare.
794
00:41:23,456 --> 00:41:25,832
That was before
the big enzyme breakthrough.
795
00:41:27,293 --> 00:41:29,044
Then of course, there's the--
ahem--
796
00:41:29,629 --> 00:41:31,963
other problem of the mutations.
797
00:41:34,800 --> 00:41:36,384
Mutations?
Wait a second now.
798
00:41:36,385 --> 00:41:37,594
You never mentioned that before.
799
00:41:37,595 --> 00:41:39,513
Well, creating
the perfect buck private
800
00:41:39,514 --> 00:41:42,098
is no box of chocolates, mister.
801
00:41:42,099 --> 00:41:43,475
All right, yeah.
Got it.
802
00:41:45,561 --> 00:41:46,520
[C.H.U.D.s growling]
803
00:41:46,521 --> 00:41:47,687
Hey! What the hell's going on?!
804
00:41:47,688 --> 00:41:48,688
Wh-What's the matter with you guys?!
805
00:41:49,148 --> 00:41:50,148
[glass shattering]
MAN: Hey!
806
00:41:50,525 --> 00:41:51,650
I'll buy you a hamburger!
807
00:41:52,235 --> 00:41:53,652
What the hell is that?
808
00:41:54,320 --> 00:41:55,695
C.H.U.D.s.
C.H.U.D.s.
809
00:41:55,696 --> 00:41:56,988
Oh, is this a great job or what?
810
00:41:58,449 --> 00:41:59,449
Shit.
811
00:42:01,786 --> 00:42:03,161
SAM: Stop! No more!
812
00:42:03,496 --> 00:42:04,955
Here, dummy.
Shoot the trunk.
813
00:42:08,584 --> 00:42:10,126
Forget this.
Keep the food.
814
00:42:14,006 --> 00:42:15,298
COL. MASTERS:
C.H.U.D. frying time!
815
00:42:17,593 --> 00:42:18,927
Haul ass, Sam.
816
00:42:33,150 --> 00:42:34,150
You know what this means?
817
00:42:34,860 --> 00:42:37,112
We are going to have to arm
the men with woks.
818
00:42:43,244 --> 00:42:44,619
Right, Hometown,
this is Masters.
819
00:42:45,746 --> 00:42:47,872
Yeah, we have a situation
down here.
820
00:42:48,291 --> 00:42:49,291
C.H.U.D.
821
00:42:49,292 --> 00:42:50,750
I need men down here.
822
00:42:50,751 --> 00:42:52,544
I need flamethrowers,
nitro guns,
823
00:42:52,962 --> 00:42:53,962
the whole enchilada.
824
00:42:54,964 --> 00:42:56,590
Yes, and don't tell the president.
825
00:42:57,258 --> 00:42:58,508
He wouldn't understand anyway.
826
00:42:58,509 --> 00:42:59,801
We'll start a sweep of the area.
827
00:43:00,219 --> 00:43:01,386
Sam, head for the outskirts.
828
00:43:01,387 --> 00:43:02,387
We'll go north.
829
00:43:03,055 --> 00:43:05,473
You up for a ride to the country,
boy? Huh?
830
00:43:05,474 --> 00:43:06,516
Why not?
831
00:43:06,517 --> 00:43:09,436
Well, we fried a bunch of them here,
but there may be more.
832
00:43:09,937 --> 00:43:10,937
We must have gone past them.
833
00:43:15,985 --> 00:43:17,110
What a blast.
834
00:43:22,325 --> 00:43:23,325
KATIE: There's the truck.
835
00:43:23,951 --> 00:43:25,535
STEVE: Let's go reclaim
our dead guy.
836
00:43:27,204 --> 00:43:28,246
KEVIN:
Where the hell are we?
837
00:43:28,247 --> 00:43:29,873
KATIE: I don't know,
but I don't like it.
838
00:43:32,835 --> 00:43:33,835
KEVIN:
I don't see him anywhere.
839
00:43:35,755 --> 00:43:36,755
STEVE:
Let's check the barn.
840
00:43:47,975 --> 00:43:49,184
[groans]
841
00:43:49,185 --> 00:43:50,185
Buddy!
842
00:43:50,519 --> 00:43:51,519
Ha ha!
843
00:43:51,854 --> 00:43:53,021
Guys, it's Buddy.
844
00:43:53,689 --> 00:43:55,732
Wh--am I glad to see you, pal.
845
00:43:56,150 --> 00:43:58,068
Look, what do you say
we go for a ride
846
00:43:58,069 --> 00:44:00,570
with ol' Stevie, Kevie,
and Katie here, huh?
847
00:44:01,822 --> 00:44:03,031
[roars]
848
00:44:05,368 --> 00:44:06,368
I don't think he wants to go.
849
00:44:08,746 --> 00:44:10,455
Ka-tie.
850
00:44:13,250 --> 00:44:14,959
[gasps]
851
00:44:15,878 --> 00:44:16,961
He likes you.
852
00:44:17,213 --> 00:44:18,213
You wanna chat him up?
853
00:44:18,422 --> 00:44:19,631
KATIE:
Do you want a fat lip?
854
00:44:20,299 --> 00:44:21,466
KEVIN:
Guess who's coming to dinner.
855
00:44:21,467 --> 00:44:22,884
KATIE:
I just lost my appetite.
856
00:44:23,719 --> 00:44:26,763
Whoa. We're talking
major sushi action here.
857
00:44:27,723 --> 00:44:28,973
These guys look serious, Steve.
858
00:44:28,974 --> 00:44:30,600
[farmer whistling a tune]
859
00:44:33,938 --> 00:44:34,938
Hey!
860
00:44:36,649 --> 00:44:38,900
What in the Wide World of Sports
is going on in here?
861
00:44:39,110 --> 00:44:40,235
Whatever it is,
we're not part of it.
862
00:44:40,444 --> 00:44:41,403
[racks shotgun]
863
00:44:41,404 --> 00:44:43,029
Yum, yum, yum.
864
00:44:43,906 --> 00:44:45,073
Back off, Bucky.
865
00:44:49,662 --> 00:44:52,247
Now you kids take Mr. Smile here
and get the hell out of my barn.
866
00:44:52,248 --> 00:44:53,206
Raah!
867
00:44:53,207 --> 00:44:54,874
STEVE: Hey, this guy shows
a lot of spunk.
868
00:44:57,628 --> 00:44:58,712
[chomp]
869
00:44:59,046 --> 00:45:00,046
KEVIN: Come on, Katie.
870
00:45:00,172 --> 00:45:01,172
STEVE: I'm with you guys.
871
00:45:02,299 --> 00:45:03,633
[C.H.U.D.s hissing]
872
00:45:03,634 --> 00:45:05,093
Get back. Hey!
873
00:45:05,386 --> 00:45:06,386
[Katie screams]
874
00:45:08,889 --> 00:45:10,348
Aah! Aah!
875
00:45:15,020 --> 00:45:16,563
Steve! Do something, Steve.
876
00:45:18,357 --> 00:45:19,983
- Do something.
- Like what?
877
00:45:21,235 --> 00:45:22,402
Yaah!
878
00:45:22,403 --> 00:45:23,403
Aah! Unh!
879
00:45:24,905 --> 00:45:26,948
[sighs]
880
00:45:32,413 --> 00:45:33,872
Ye-uhh!
881
00:45:43,090 --> 00:45:44,090
[whimpers]
882
00:45:56,562 --> 00:45:57,520
Come on, Katie.
883
00:45:57,521 --> 00:45:59,105
- Let's get out of here.
- I'm with you guys.
884
00:46:00,316 --> 00:46:02,567
[soldiers clamoring]
885
00:46:06,489 --> 00:46:07,489
This C.H.U.D.'s for you.
886
00:46:10,367 --> 00:46:11,367
SOLDIER:
Hold your position.
887
00:46:14,997 --> 00:46:15,997
Ciao.
888
00:46:25,841 --> 00:46:26,841
Chow.
889
00:46:28,135 --> 00:46:29,260
[mooing]
890
00:46:30,095 --> 00:46:31,721
Sir! Sir, they're attacking!
What should we do?!
891
00:46:32,181 --> 00:46:33,473
Freeze him!
Freeze him!
892
00:46:40,731 --> 00:46:42,941
After them, men.
Destroy all the C.H.U.D.s.
893
00:46:43,651 --> 00:46:47,111
Holy cow. Suppose our stiff
was carrying some sort of disease.
894
00:46:47,112 --> 00:46:49,113
We picked him up from
the Disease Control Center.
895
00:46:49,657 --> 00:46:51,032
KATIE:
We could have started a plague.
896
00:46:53,911 --> 00:46:55,411
What's up?
Steve Williams, nice to meet you.
897
00:46:55,621 --> 00:46:57,038
Cut the crap.
Where's the C.H.U.D.?
898
00:46:57,039 --> 00:46:58,039
Chud?
899
00:46:59,917 --> 00:47:01,125
Keep it up, you assholes.
900
00:47:01,919 --> 00:47:05,255
By the time you get out of the slammer
you'll all be senior citizens.
901
00:47:06,340 --> 00:47:08,091
All right, move out. Move out!
I'm taking you in.
902
00:47:08,509 --> 00:47:09,509
Move out.
903
00:47:10,052 --> 00:47:11,052
Where are we going?
904
00:47:11,053 --> 00:47:12,470
In. In and out.
905
00:47:12,471 --> 00:47:13,429
Uh, sir--
906
00:47:13,430 --> 00:47:14,430
Shut up, wiseass.
907
00:47:14,974 --> 00:47:15,974
Uh, General, um...
908
00:47:16,141 --> 00:47:18,643
Do you know what happens
to pretty boys like you in prison?
909
00:47:18,644 --> 00:47:19,602
Your Royalness--
910
00:47:19,603 --> 00:47:20,603
What?! What is it?
911
00:47:26,360 --> 00:47:28,361
Hot damn, look at that.
912
00:47:29,905 --> 00:47:32,782
He's forcing his body temperature up
to melt the ice.
913
00:47:35,494 --> 00:47:38,288
This guy is fucking fantastic!
914
00:47:43,377 --> 00:47:44,752
Hey! Hey, wait! Stop!
915
00:47:46,380 --> 00:47:47,547
Whoa!
916
00:47:47,548 --> 00:47:48,882
GRAVES: Sir, I got one.
917
00:47:51,010 --> 00:47:51,968
We caught another.
918
00:47:51,969 --> 00:47:52,969
We got one, too.
919
00:47:53,178 --> 00:47:54,262
I lost one.
920
00:47:54,263 --> 00:47:56,222
This is worse than I thought.
It's awful.
921
00:47:56,515 --> 00:47:59,058
Awful? It was beautiful.
922
00:47:59,810 --> 00:48:00,894
You should have seen it, Graves.
923
00:48:01,854 --> 00:48:03,479
They're mutating, changing.
924
00:48:03,814 --> 00:48:06,566
The mutations have been transferred
from the original enzymes.
925
00:48:06,567 --> 00:48:07,525
Wait a second.
That means--
926
00:48:07,526 --> 00:48:09,027
That's right.
They're getting stronger.
927
00:48:09,028 --> 00:48:11,070
Soon there'll be no stopping them.
It was great.
928
00:48:12,823 --> 00:48:13,823
Ahem.
929
00:48:13,991 --> 00:48:14,991
All right.
930
00:48:15,284 --> 00:48:16,868
All right, you new men,
931
00:48:18,203 --> 00:48:19,203
these are C.H.U.D.s,
932
00:48:20,581 --> 00:48:22,123
very hungry people...
933
00:48:23,208 --> 00:48:24,292
with bad complexions
934
00:48:25,294 --> 00:48:26,920
and a brain that doesn't
know when to stop.
935
00:48:28,422 --> 00:48:29,380
Any questions?
936
00:48:29,381 --> 00:48:30,715
MAN 1:
Where's the exit transfer?
937
00:48:30,716 --> 00:48:31,716
MAN 2:
How do we get out of here?
938
00:48:32,259 --> 00:48:33,551
Now, your guns are useless.
939
00:48:34,303 --> 00:48:36,179
Freezing them
will slow them down.
940
00:48:36,847 --> 00:48:38,473
Then whoosh!
941
00:48:39,308 --> 00:48:40,308
You got it?
942
00:48:41,185 --> 00:48:44,020
Now, we've got our work cut out for us.
943
00:48:44,813 --> 00:48:48,858
They're going to be all over this town,
and they're attracted to large crowds.
944
00:48:49,526 --> 00:48:51,361
A large gathering, a rally,
945
00:48:52,112 --> 00:48:56,282
a football game will look like
a buffet lunch to these slimeballs.
946
00:48:56,784 --> 00:48:57,784
Let's get rolling.
947
00:48:58,160 --> 00:48:59,953
Gotta be able to cut
this nest out by breakfast.
948
00:49:03,165 --> 00:49:04,457
COL. MASTERS:
You two, take the van.
949
00:49:04,875 --> 00:49:07,335
You, take the kids' car
back to headquarters.
950
00:49:07,628 --> 00:49:09,754
We'll regroup there
while waiting for reinforcements.
951
00:49:10,214 --> 00:49:11,214
Let's go!
952
00:49:17,179 --> 00:49:19,222
Can't have these things
driving about town, can we?
953
00:49:24,269 --> 00:49:25,269
All right. Move out.
954
00:49:30,275 --> 00:49:32,568
KATIE: I know my rights.
I wanna make a telephone call.
955
00:49:32,861 --> 00:49:34,737
STEVE: Yeah. Drop us off
at the nearest phone booth,
956
00:49:35,531 --> 00:49:36,656
and can I borrow a dime, please?
957
00:49:52,631 --> 00:49:53,631
Oops.
958
00:50:20,617 --> 00:50:21,617
Meat.
959
00:50:25,122 --> 00:50:26,414
# I'm a-walkin' #
960
00:50:27,207 --> 00:50:28,291
# I'm a-talkin' #
961
00:50:29,084 --> 00:50:30,251
# I'm a-stalkin' #
962
00:50:30,461 --> 00:50:31,711
# Comin' to your room tonight #
963
00:50:32,379 --> 00:50:34,088
KATIE:
Can I please call my parents?
964
00:50:35,090 --> 00:50:37,717
COL. MASTERS mocking:
No, you can't.
965
00:50:39,970 --> 00:50:41,846
''Be a doctor.
Be a doctor. Be a doctor.''
966
00:50:43,223 --> 00:50:47,018
I am. I'm--I'm personal surgeon
to the United States Post Office. See?
967
00:50:47,686 --> 00:50:52,940
[mic feedback]
Victim is, uh, Norvel Laurel.
968
00:50:53,567 --> 00:50:55,443
Occupation: Postman.
969
00:50:55,903 --> 00:50:56,944
Hate mail finally got you, didn't it?
970
00:50:57,279 --> 00:50:58,821
Ah ha ha ha ha!
971
00:51:00,240 --> 00:51:01,866
Age: Uh, 42.
972
00:51:02,618 --> 00:51:03,618
Race: Caucasian.
973
00:51:04,036 --> 00:51:07,914
Description of wound:
Some--uh, several large bites.
974
00:51:07,915 --> 00:51:09,040
Probably a canine.
975
00:51:11,627 --> 00:51:13,628
No, scratch the canine.
976
00:51:14,171 --> 00:51:16,255
He probably did that to himself.
[laughs]
977
00:51:16,632 --> 00:51:18,424
All right,
I'm going into the chest.
978
00:51:18,842 --> 00:51:19,842
Ahh.
979
00:51:21,011 --> 00:51:23,012
Feet and hands inside for the ride.
980
00:51:23,806 --> 00:51:25,431
[grunts]
981
00:51:25,432 --> 00:51:26,849
Ahh! [chomp]
982
00:51:39,196 --> 00:51:40,363
[hiccup]
983
00:51:44,368 --> 00:51:45,618
[hiccup]
984
00:51:45,619 --> 00:51:47,745
COL. MASTERS: If you cooperate,
we'll go easy on you.
985
00:51:48,330 --> 00:51:51,082
If not, we'll make your life
a living hell.
986
00:51:51,083 --> 00:51:52,083
STEVE: Sounds fair.
987
00:51:57,756 --> 00:51:58,798
[hiccup]
988
00:51:59,591 --> 00:52:00,675
Tastes great.
989
00:52:01,760 --> 00:52:03,136
Less filling.
990
00:52:03,137 --> 00:52:05,346
[both laughing]
991
00:52:07,891 --> 00:52:10,059
[conversations and laughter]
992
00:52:10,853 --> 00:52:12,186
MAN: What the heck is this?
993
00:52:12,187 --> 00:52:13,146
[patrons screaming]
994
00:52:13,147 --> 00:52:14,605
[chomp, burp]
995
00:52:33,167 --> 00:52:35,126
You punks have no idea
what you've done.
996
00:52:36,003 --> 00:52:37,503
Look, we didn't even
know he was a chump.
997
00:52:37,504 --> 00:52:39,088
- C.H.U.D.
- Until a few hours ago.
998
00:52:39,548 --> 00:52:40,965
Yeah. We thought we brought him
back to life
999
00:52:40,966 --> 00:52:42,633
with my mom's bubblebath
and hairdryer.
1000
00:52:42,885 --> 00:52:43,885
That's ridiculous.
1001
00:52:44,303 --> 00:52:47,096
Ah, yeah, right, like
government-sponsored zombies aren't.
1002
00:52:48,348 --> 00:52:53,102
You...you see if you can
talk some sense into kids.
1003
00:52:56,398 --> 00:52:57,607
[barking]
1004
00:52:58,358 --> 00:52:59,442
Hey, puppy.
1005
00:53:00,027 --> 00:53:01,027
You lost?
1006
00:53:01,570 --> 00:53:03,988
Aw, poor little guy.
1007
00:53:04,823 --> 00:53:07,158
Come here, puppy, uppy.
1008
00:53:07,576 --> 00:53:09,368
Come on. Come on.
1009
00:53:09,870 --> 00:53:11,245
[sternly]
I said to come here.
1010
00:53:12,206 --> 00:53:13,372
[growling]
I was only kidding.
1011
00:53:13,790 --> 00:53:15,041
I'm not gonna hurt you.
1012
00:53:15,417 --> 00:53:16,417
Come on.
1013
00:53:16,793 --> 00:53:17,960
Aw, I know.
1014
00:53:18,420 --> 00:53:20,671
I can get you a sandwich
from inside.
1015
00:53:21,465 --> 00:53:23,174
You wanted somethin to eat?
1016
00:53:23,634 --> 00:53:24,675
Aw, is the--
1017
00:53:24,676 --> 00:53:26,510
[screaming]
[snarling]
1018
00:53:45,614 --> 00:53:46,822
GIRL: I got some peppermint!
1019
00:53:46,823 --> 00:53:47,823
SECOND GIRL: I got an apple.
1020
00:53:48,033 --> 00:53:49,033
BOY: I got a rock.
1021
00:54:11,556 --> 00:54:13,057
[crack]
1022
00:54:22,693 --> 00:54:23,693
# Smell my feet #
1023
00:54:24,152 --> 00:54:26,654
# Give me something good to eat #
1024
00:54:27,072 --> 00:54:28,531
GIRL:
I got a popcorn ball!
1025
00:54:29,032 --> 00:54:30,241
BOY:
I got a punch in the nose.
1026
00:54:31,868 --> 00:54:32,994
MR. WILLIAMS: I hate Halloween.
1027
00:54:32,995 --> 00:54:34,036
He's just kidding, honey.
1028
00:54:34,037 --> 00:54:35,329
[all roar]
1029
00:54:36,206 --> 00:54:37,331
Now, look, I want you to tell me
1030
00:54:37,332 --> 00:54:40,293
everything you know
about this corpse, okay?
1031
00:54:41,295 --> 00:54:42,753
Anything that will help us
track it down--
1032
00:54:42,754 --> 00:54:46,090
behavioral patterns,
personality quirks, anything.
1033
00:54:46,842 --> 00:54:48,092
Well, he eats people.
1034
00:54:48,093 --> 00:54:50,261
I guess that could be interpreted
as a personality quirk.
1035
00:54:51,096 --> 00:54:52,096
This isn't funny,
Mister.
1036
00:54:53,056 --> 00:54:56,100
I mean, you have unleashed
a very real threat here, okay?
1037
00:54:56,727 --> 00:54:58,394
We're not just talkin' about
some animated corpse.
1038
00:54:59,104 --> 00:55:00,104
You got it?!
1039
00:55:00,439 --> 00:55:02,356
Everything it infects mutates!
1040
00:55:02,983 --> 00:55:04,191
We're really sorry.
1041
00:55:05,527 --> 00:55:06,610
Oh. Okay.
1042
00:55:07,112 --> 00:55:08,654
YOUNG GIRL:
I got a black licorice.
1043
00:55:12,617 --> 00:55:13,659
[mutters]
1044
00:55:14,077 --> 00:55:15,494
TEENAGE GIRL: Hey, you guys, look.
There's the poster.
1045
00:55:15,954 --> 00:55:16,954
TEENAGE BOY:
Halloween dance.
1046
00:55:17,539 --> 00:55:18,789
Hey, you guys wanna go?
1047
00:55:18,999 --> 00:55:20,249
TEENAGE BOY:
Hope the band doesn't suck.
1048
00:55:22,627 --> 00:55:24,462
Small fry.
1049
00:55:25,130 --> 00:55:26,380
Yeah.
1050
00:55:27,507 --> 00:55:28,507
[little boy cries out]
1051
00:55:32,888 --> 00:55:34,513
Bitchin' costume.
1052
00:55:58,330 --> 00:55:59,413
[sighs]
1053
00:56:08,590 --> 00:56:10,257
Eat 'em up.
Eat 'em up.
1054
00:56:10,258 --> 00:56:11,509
ALL: Yum, yum, yum.
1055
00:56:12,094 --> 00:56:13,094
Trick-or-treating?
1056
00:56:13,595 --> 00:56:15,679
Oh, Jesus Christ. I forgot
all about Halloween.
1057
00:56:16,348 --> 00:56:17,890
KIDS, C.H.U.D.ified: Trick or treat.
1058
00:56:17,891 --> 00:56:19,600
[knocking on door]
[tweeting]
1059
00:56:20,227 --> 00:56:23,187
Oh, Mother, I reckon
we've got to let them in.
1060
00:56:23,355 --> 00:56:24,355
Heh heh ha ha.
1061
00:56:26,358 --> 00:56:27,650
[kids roar]
1062
00:56:29,611 --> 00:56:32,405
My, oh, my.
Things that go bump in the night.
1063
00:56:32,572 --> 00:56:33,906
Come on.
Come on, kids.
1064
00:56:33,907 --> 00:56:36,409
We've got such surprises
and goodies and treats.
1065
00:56:36,701 --> 00:56:37,660
Take all you want.
1066
00:56:37,661 --> 00:56:38,661
All right. Here.
1067
00:56:38,662 --> 00:56:43,416
- All you scary demons and ghoulies.
- Help yourself, have some candy.
1068
00:56:43,417 --> 00:56:44,417
Lovely candy.
1069
00:56:44,793 --> 00:56:46,168
Oh. Ohh!
1070
00:56:46,503 --> 00:56:47,503
Oh, no!
1071
00:56:47,504 --> 00:56:48,546
[tweeting]
1072
00:56:51,633 --> 00:56:53,134
- Rosebud.
- [chomp]
1073
00:56:57,556 --> 00:56:59,557
[big band music playing]
1074
00:57:01,226 --> 00:57:02,268
Ohh.
1075
00:57:05,313 --> 00:57:06,439
[both gasping]
1076
00:57:14,281 --> 00:57:15,281
[chomping]
1077
00:57:15,699 --> 00:57:16,740
[wife screaming]
1078
00:57:19,578 --> 00:57:21,203
All right, man the fort, Graves.
I'm off to town.
1079
00:57:21,204 --> 00:57:22,246
Well, wait. Wait.
What's up?
1080
00:57:22,247 --> 00:57:23,956
It's Halloween.
The streets are crawling with kids.
1081
00:57:23,957 --> 00:57:24,957
Oh, great.
1082
00:57:26,710 --> 00:57:28,836
Let's hope we can keep them
from becoming snacks.
1083
00:57:29,296 --> 00:57:30,296
Yeah, but how do we kill them?
1084
00:57:30,380 --> 00:57:31,380
Who the hell knows?
1085
00:57:32,591 --> 00:57:34,550
Man, that's the sport of the hunt.
1086
00:57:34,801 --> 00:57:36,427
That's the thrill of war.
1087
00:57:37,220 --> 00:57:41,682
We are facing an enemy unlike anything
anyone has ever faced before.
1088
00:57:43,852 --> 00:57:46,437
Remember, plan B.
1089
00:57:51,735 --> 00:57:53,235
[door opens and closes]
1090
00:57:53,236 --> 00:57:54,278
Little high-strung, isn't he?
1091
00:58:04,414 --> 00:58:05,706
All right, Sam.
Let's head for town.
1092
00:58:06,041 --> 00:58:08,584
Ha ha! We're going to see
some real action tonight.
1093
00:58:09,878 --> 00:58:11,504
Okay, you got it.
1094
00:58:11,505 --> 00:58:12,546
[chuckles]
1095
00:58:12,547 --> 00:58:13,547
Countin' on you, Sam.
1096
00:58:14,633 --> 00:58:17,676
As a guy who never said ''no''
to Napalm. Ha ha!
1097
00:58:19,304 --> 00:58:20,888
[big band music playing]
1098
00:58:48,166 --> 00:58:49,750
There's a costume dance
at the high school tonight.
1099
00:58:50,377 --> 00:58:51,460
- Oh, no.
- What?
1100
00:58:52,045 --> 00:58:53,212
A couple hundred people
should be there.
1101
00:58:53,213 --> 00:58:54,755
There'll be music.
There'll be noise.
1102
00:58:54,756 --> 00:58:56,966
- The C.H.U.D.s will definitely--
- Oh, jeez. Oh, jeez!
1103
00:58:56,967 --> 00:58:58,175
That would be
a perfect feeding spot.
1104
00:58:58,593 --> 00:59:00,594
I mean, that dance will be like a beacon
for the C.H.U.D.s.
1105
00:59:00,595 --> 00:59:02,221
- A crowd of people.
- A crowd of C.H.U.D.s.
1106
00:59:02,222 --> 00:59:03,597
- Fast food.
- Fast death.
1107
00:59:03,598 --> 00:59:06,100
All hell will break loose
if we don't get to the dance before...
1108
00:59:06,101 --> 00:59:07,268
- The C.H.U.D.s--
- Wreak havoc.
1109
00:59:07,811 --> 00:59:09,019
- Wreak?
- I think it's Latin.
1110
00:59:09,396 --> 00:59:10,688
You know, if the C.H.U.D.s
increase their numbers--
1111
00:59:10,689 --> 00:59:12,439
There'll be no stopping them.
The end of civilization.
1112
00:59:12,732 --> 00:59:13,899
A world filled with zombies.
1113
00:59:19,406 --> 00:59:20,990
[music playing inside]
1114
00:59:24,578 --> 00:59:25,578
The living dead.
1115
00:59:26,413 --> 00:59:27,621
So disgusting.
1116
00:59:30,208 --> 00:59:32,501
And yet I can't help
but feel sorry for him.
1117
00:59:33,128 --> 00:59:34,128
GRAVES:
Get me Masters.
1118
00:59:34,838 --> 00:59:35,796
Now!
1119
00:59:35,797 --> 00:59:36,797
Wreak?
1120
00:59:37,924 --> 00:59:39,717
Yaah!
[screams]
1121
00:59:40,510 --> 00:59:41,510
[Bud growling]
1122
00:59:43,179 --> 00:59:44,179
Are you okay?
1123
00:59:45,265 --> 00:59:46,557
Come on. We gotta
get to the high school.
1124
00:59:47,058 --> 00:59:48,100
Well, what can we do?
1125
00:59:48,393 --> 00:59:49,393
We can evacuate the kids.
1126
00:59:49,811 --> 00:59:51,103
At least we've got speed on our side.
1127
00:59:52,772 --> 00:59:54,773
Okay. You take the lead car.
I'll get the men.
1128
00:59:55,108 --> 00:59:56,191
Aah!
1129
00:59:56,735 --> 00:59:57,735
Maybe not.
1130
01:00:00,155 --> 01:00:04,366
Remember, it's not just a town
full of zombies you're after!
1131
01:00:04,743 --> 01:00:08,078
You're after the worst threat
this civilization has ever experienced!
1132
01:00:08,580 --> 01:00:10,414
Oh, God! I knew
I should've been a plumber.
1133
01:00:13,168 --> 01:00:14,918
[playing rock 'n' roll]
1134
01:00:18,632 --> 01:00:21,383
# Well, come from America,
a little romance #
1135
01:00:21,760 --> 01:00:24,178
# Everybody's doin'
this brave new dance #
1136
01:00:25,138 --> 01:00:27,181
# Do it in the alley,
they do it in the street #
1137
01:00:27,432 --> 01:00:29,016
# It's a brave new dance,
hear me #
1138
01:00:30,685 --> 01:00:32,144
# It's a brave new dance #
1139
01:00:34,064 --> 01:00:35,064
# Down on our knees #
1140
01:00:35,065 --> 01:00:36,357
# It's a brave new dance #
1141
01:00:38,485 --> 01:00:39,443
KEVIN: Can't you go any faster?
1142
01:00:39,444 --> 01:00:41,362
KATIE: This is a government van,
not a Maserati.
1143
01:00:41,738 --> 01:00:43,405
STEVE: There's nothing
to kill them with at the school.
1144
01:00:43,823 --> 01:00:45,449
Well, there has to be.
There has to be.
1145
01:00:45,992 --> 01:00:47,660
Wait a minute.
Check out this stuff.
1146
01:00:50,121 --> 01:00:51,664
This is the stuff the feds used
at the barn.
1147
01:00:53,875 --> 01:00:55,376
[growling]
1148
01:00:55,960 --> 01:00:58,545
[rock 'n' roll music
audible from dance]
1149
01:01:03,343 --> 01:01:04,343
Buffet.
1150
01:01:05,053 --> 01:01:06,595
[C.H.U.D.s growling]
1151
01:01:13,853 --> 01:01:15,104
# This is an animal move #
1152
01:01:15,605 --> 01:01:16,605
# Brave new dance #
1153
01:01:16,731 --> 01:01:18,774
# We're dreaming our land
gives through #
1154
01:01:19,192 --> 01:01:20,192
# A brave new dance #
1155
01:01:22,028 --> 01:01:23,028
# Shake your legs #
1156
01:01:23,405 --> 01:01:24,405
# Brave new dance #
1157
01:01:25,198 --> 01:01:28,033
# Just get to the battle
and get crazy #
1158
01:01:29,035 --> 01:01:30,828
# But do a brave new dance #
1159
01:01:30,829 --> 01:01:32,037
# Do a brave new dance #
1160
01:01:32,330 --> 01:01:33,580
# Into the breach right here #
1161
01:01:33,748 --> 01:01:34,915
# Do a brave new dance #
1162
01:01:36,209 --> 01:01:38,585
# Go to la guerre
like those French kids #
1163
01:01:41,172 --> 01:01:43,549
# Goin' to battle,
don't take no shit #
1164
01:01:44,592 --> 01:01:46,009
[tires skid]
1165
01:01:48,513 --> 01:01:49,680
KATIE: There's nobody
on the streets.
1166
01:01:50,056 --> 01:01:51,056
Where is everyone?
1167
01:01:51,057 --> 01:01:52,850
STEVE: This is creepy,
like the end of the world or something.
1168
01:01:52,851 --> 01:01:53,851
KEVIN: Just go. Go!
1169
01:01:54,227 --> 01:01:55,519
Come on.
We're almost there.
1170
01:01:55,520 --> 01:01:56,478
Wait. I have an idea.
1171
01:01:56,479 --> 01:01:58,021
Katie, drive the van
up to the loading dock.
1172
01:02:14,497 --> 01:02:15,539
Eat 'em up,
eat 'em up.
1173
01:02:15,832 --> 01:02:16,832
ALL: Yum, yum, yum.
1174
01:02:18,835 --> 01:02:19,752
STEVE: We're too late.
1175
01:02:19,753 --> 01:02:20,711
KEVIN: No, we're not.
No, we're not.
1176
01:02:20,712 --> 01:02:21,962
Just drive to the loading dock.
1177
01:02:22,380 --> 01:02:23,380
But they're already there.
1178
01:02:23,840 --> 01:02:25,507
# Get your hands on the wheel #
1179
01:02:26,801 --> 01:02:28,719
# I gotta hold them up here #
1180
01:02:31,473 --> 01:02:32,598
Can I see your ticket, Bud?
1181
01:02:33,308 --> 01:02:34,308
Ticket?
1182
01:02:39,606 --> 01:02:42,274
Hey. What, are you guys
from Midvale High or somethin'?
1183
01:02:42,984 --> 01:02:44,401
Look, I don't want any trouble.
1184
01:02:44,819 --> 01:02:45,903
[growls]
1185
01:02:46,446 --> 01:02:47,821
That'll be 3 bucks apiece.
1186
01:02:49,741 --> 01:02:51,700
3, 6, 9...
1187
01:02:53,119 --> 01:02:54,119
[all growl]
1188
01:02:54,704 --> 01:02:57,414
And the dog has got
to stay out here.
1189
01:02:58,500 --> 01:02:59,583
[all growl]
1190
01:03:00,919 --> 01:03:03,504
Okay, okay.
You can take the dog inside.
1191
01:03:05,507 --> 01:03:06,799
[knuckles cracking]
1192
01:03:07,592 --> 01:03:08,592
[all roar]
1193
01:03:09,761 --> 01:03:10,761
[chomping]
1194
01:03:15,642 --> 01:03:17,351
STEVE:
What? No valet parking?
1195
01:03:17,352 --> 01:03:18,352
KATIE: Steve.
1196
01:03:23,942 --> 01:03:24,858
We don't have much time.
1197
01:03:24,859 --> 01:03:25,818
Right.
1198
01:03:25,819 --> 01:03:26,902
- We gotta act fast.
- Right.
1199
01:03:27,278 --> 01:03:28,403
We get this equipment
near the gym.
1200
01:03:28,404 --> 01:03:29,363
STEVE: Yeah.
1201
01:03:29,364 --> 01:03:30,948
We gotta isolate the C.H.U.D.s
from the other kids.
1202
01:03:31,157 --> 01:03:32,783
- Why?
- We can stop 'em with this stuff.
1203
01:03:32,784 --> 01:03:33,784
Sounds like a plan.
1204
01:03:34,285 --> 01:03:35,577
- It does?
- Yeah.
1205
01:03:36,246 --> 01:03:37,246
- Right.
- Right.
1206
01:03:43,837 --> 01:03:45,170
[applause and cheering]
1207
01:03:46,756 --> 01:03:47,756
Shhh!
1208
01:03:48,007 --> 01:03:51,468
SINGER:
I am a hungry man.
1209
01:03:52,095 --> 01:03:54,179
[band playing rock 'n' roll]
1210
01:03:56,641 --> 01:03:57,975
C.H.U.D.s: Let's party!
1211
01:04:09,070 --> 01:04:10,279
Great costumes.
1212
01:04:10,446 --> 01:04:11,446
Who are they?
1213
01:04:11,489 --> 01:04:12,531
Is that my father?
1214
01:04:13,199 --> 01:04:15,367
[chomp, grunting]
1215
01:04:15,368 --> 01:04:16,368
[Katie gasps]
1216
01:04:16,870 --> 01:04:17,870
Gross.
1217
01:04:20,248 --> 01:04:21,623
- Mr. Proctor's one of them.
- Shoot him!
1218
01:04:21,791 --> 01:04:22,791
KATIE: We're gonna
have to kill him.
1219
01:04:24,919 --> 01:04:27,004
- Great. Aw, great!
- What are we gonna do, Kevin?
1220
01:04:27,005 --> 01:04:29,214
- Can't you work that thing?
- Throw him some lab rats or something.
1221
01:04:29,215 --> 01:04:30,924
- I'm trying to!
- Turn this on.
1222
01:04:31,509 --> 01:04:33,010
Quick!
[electric hum]
1223
01:04:33,970 --> 01:04:35,137
Suck on these.
1224
01:04:35,722 --> 01:04:36,763
[groaning]
1225
01:04:39,017 --> 01:04:40,225
[laughing]
1226
01:04:42,854 --> 01:04:43,896
[growls]
1227
01:04:44,981 --> 01:04:45,981
[screaming]
1228
01:04:48,985 --> 01:04:50,068
Get him, Steve!
1229
01:04:51,654 --> 01:04:52,654
[Proctor grunting]
1230
01:05:16,137 --> 01:05:17,304
I--I can't
hold him down.
1231
01:05:17,305 --> 01:05:18,305
Hold him down on this!
1232
01:05:19,807 --> 01:05:21,016
[gasping]
1233
01:05:33,905 --> 01:05:35,113
[laughing]
1234
01:05:38,493 --> 01:05:40,035
- I think it's gonna work.
- Shoot him.
1235
01:05:40,578 --> 01:05:41,620
Come on!
Come on.
1236
01:05:41,621 --> 01:05:42,621
KATIE: Kevin!
1237
01:05:43,247 --> 01:05:44,706
STEVE:
Jeez, he was ugly before, but...
1238
01:05:46,626 --> 01:05:48,585
[gasping]
1239
01:06:02,183 --> 01:06:03,183
Nice shot.
1240
01:06:03,184 --> 01:06:04,810
Yeah, but how long is he
gonna stay like that?
1241
01:06:05,103 --> 01:06:07,187
Who cares.
Let's just get the hell out of here.
1242
01:06:07,897 --> 01:06:09,690
Wait. Steve,
I wanna try something.
1243
01:06:10,149 --> 01:06:11,108
Are you crazy?
Come on.
1244
01:06:11,109 --> 01:06:12,109
What are you gonna do, Kev?
1245
01:06:13,903 --> 01:06:14,903
- What are you...
- Come on.
1246
01:06:14,904 --> 01:06:15,904
Are you crazy?
1247
01:06:16,114 --> 01:06:17,072
- What are you doing!
- Just a second!
1248
01:06:17,073 --> 01:06:18,407
He always was the teacher's pet.
1249
01:06:18,408 --> 01:06:20,033
- God.
- Go! Run!
1250
01:06:29,127 --> 01:06:30,127
KATIE:
We destroyed a C.H.U.D.
1251
01:06:31,004 --> 01:06:33,255
You know, if he were alive,
1252
01:06:34,215 --> 01:06:35,298
he would've given us an A for that.
1253
01:06:35,299 --> 01:06:36,550
Come on.
We don't have much time.
1254
01:07:01,075 --> 01:07:02,075
KEVIN: I know what happened.
1255
01:07:02,285 --> 01:07:04,745
The introduction of electricity
shorts out their supercharged brains.
1256
01:07:04,746 --> 01:07:06,830
Once the body's on ice it becomes
a closed system.
1257
01:07:07,206 --> 01:07:09,499
Then the contained electrical charge
causes an implosion.
1258
01:07:09,667 --> 01:07:11,334
If we can get them in the pool,
I have an idea.
1259
01:07:11,335 --> 01:07:12,294
Sounds like a plan.
1260
01:07:12,295 --> 01:07:13,295
- It does?
- Yeah.
1261
01:07:31,189 --> 01:07:32,522
Okay, over there under the clock.
1262
01:07:37,361 --> 01:07:38,862
Now all we have to do
is get them in the pool.
1263
01:07:39,781 --> 01:07:41,114
- How?
- We need bait.
1264
01:07:42,366 --> 01:07:43,533
My locker's right over here.
1265
01:07:43,826 --> 01:07:44,785
No, you can't do that.
1266
01:07:44,786 --> 01:07:45,786
Yes, I can, Kevin.
1267
01:07:45,787 --> 01:07:47,788
- He's right, Katie.
- No, he's not, Steve.
1268
01:07:47,789 --> 01:07:48,789
I don't want you to get hurt.
1269
01:07:49,749 --> 01:07:51,041
Thanks, Kevin. Really.
1270
01:07:51,042 --> 01:07:52,042
I'm gonna go myself.
1271
01:07:52,335 --> 01:07:54,419
If you were a C.H.U.D.,
who would you prefer for a meal?
1272
01:07:56,964 --> 01:07:58,006
Please be careful.
1273
01:07:58,591 --> 01:08:01,218
Listen, I like that you care, really.
1274
01:08:01,469 --> 01:08:02,469
Now I'm gonna go change.
1275
01:08:03,471 --> 01:08:04,471
STEVE: Can I watch?
1276
01:08:05,181 --> 01:08:06,181
[sighs]
1277
01:08:07,725 --> 01:08:08,725
Okay, let's go to work.
1278
01:08:23,407 --> 01:08:24,866
How can we be sure we'll
get 'em all in the pool?
1279
01:08:25,201 --> 01:08:26,201
That's up to Katie now.
1280
01:08:27,662 --> 01:08:29,496
[snaps]
We gotta barricade that corner.
1281
01:08:31,207 --> 01:08:32,833
Come on.
Help me move this.
1282
01:08:32,834 --> 01:08:34,209
- Move that?
- Come on!
1283
01:08:35,545 --> 01:08:36,711
KEVIN: Push!
1284
01:09:12,498 --> 01:09:15,458
[whistles]
Hey! Zombies!
1285
01:09:15,626 --> 01:09:16,626
[band stops playing]
1286
01:09:16,669 --> 01:09:17,711
Well, who wants a bite?
1287
01:09:20,173 --> 01:09:21,173
Come and get it.
1288
01:09:21,382 --> 01:09:23,133
C.H.U.D.s: Ka-tie.
1289
01:09:23,509 --> 01:09:25,760
Yum, yum, yum.
1290
01:09:25,761 --> 01:09:26,928
Oh, shit.
1291
01:09:27,847 --> 01:09:29,222
[growling]
1292
01:09:33,227 --> 01:09:34,436
[screaming]
1293
01:09:42,445 --> 01:09:43,445
Hit the lights.
1294
01:09:44,322 --> 01:09:45,447
Why?
They're afraid of the dark?
1295
01:09:45,740 --> 01:09:47,115
They might be.
Hit the lights.
1296
01:10:03,132 --> 01:10:04,132
KEVIN:
My God. The door's locked.
1297
01:10:04,383 --> 01:10:05,717
- Katie, come on!
- Get in.
1298
01:10:05,718 --> 01:10:06,968
Close the door!
Close the door! Close the door!
1299
01:10:11,015 --> 01:10:12,807
Katie, get out
of the pool!
1300
01:10:12,808 --> 01:10:13,808
Get out of the pool!
1301
01:10:14,352 --> 01:10:15,352
Get them in the pool.
1302
01:10:19,482 --> 01:10:20,482
Katie, get out!
1303
01:10:22,777 --> 01:10:24,694
Hold on to the life preserver.
Okay, get 'em in the pool.
1304
01:10:40,795 --> 01:10:41,836
Katie, get out of the pool!
1305
01:10:53,266 --> 01:10:54,266
KEVIN: Mr. Graves.
1306
01:10:56,018 --> 01:10:57,018
Mr. Graves.
1307
01:10:58,020 --> 01:10:59,271
[roars]
1308
01:11:02,692 --> 01:11:03,775
Get the tanks in the pool!
1309
01:11:05,736 --> 01:11:07,946
- Did you unscrew them?
- Sure. I think. . .
1310
01:11:07,947 --> 01:11:08,947
Damn it, Steve.
1311
01:11:14,704 --> 01:11:15,704
Keep them in the pool.
1312
01:11:22,086 --> 01:11:23,086
[chomp]
Aah!
1313
01:11:25,548 --> 01:11:26,673
Now! Kevin, now!
1314
01:11:34,515 --> 01:11:35,515
Ice cube time, boys!
1315
01:11:55,661 --> 01:11:56,661
[groaning]
1316
01:12:05,713 --> 01:12:06,796
Down, you rats.
1317
01:12:08,132 --> 01:12:10,717
[crackling]
1318
01:12:16,599 --> 01:12:17,599
[gasps]
1319
01:12:30,946 --> 01:12:32,113
Unreal.
1320
01:12:38,829 --> 01:12:40,580
[cracking]
Kevin!
1321
01:12:40,915 --> 01:12:41,915
Katie, over here!
1322
01:12:42,500 --> 01:12:43,500
Over here!
1323
01:12:44,710 --> 01:12:45,710
Yuhh.
1324
01:12:46,253 --> 01:12:47,253
KEVIN: They're melting.
1325
01:12:48,130 --> 01:12:50,548
Quick, introduce some electricity
to the ice.
1326
01:12:50,549 --> 01:12:51,549
How?
1327
01:12:51,675 --> 01:12:53,343
Um, the clock!
1328
01:12:55,096 --> 01:12:56,096
Kevin.
1329
01:12:56,347 --> 01:12:58,890
[joints cracking]
1330
01:13:09,151 --> 01:13:10,193
[roar]
1331
01:13:11,862 --> 01:13:12,862
[sobbing]
1332
01:13:15,491 --> 01:13:16,783
Be careful.
Don't let 'em touch each other.
1333
01:13:25,459 --> 01:13:26,459
Come on!
1334
01:13:27,628 --> 01:13:30,880
Ok, now, the positive charge
has to be grounded to the ice.
1335
01:13:32,550 --> 01:13:34,092
The negative charge
will be put into the--
1336
01:13:34,885 --> 01:13:37,595
Or is it to the, uh--
it's, uh--
1337
01:13:38,514 --> 01:13:40,265
The negative charge
would then be--
1338
01:13:40,266 --> 01:13:41,558
To close the circuit,
the negative charge.
1339
01:13:41,851 --> 01:13:42,851
What?!
1340
01:13:43,018 --> 01:13:44,018
Just give me a second!
1341
01:13:44,478 --> 01:13:47,105
Okay, the water become ionated
with positive electrons--
1342
01:13:48,649 --> 01:13:49,649
[Katie screams]
1343
01:13:50,025 --> 01:13:51,484
Holy cow. Here.
1344
01:13:52,403 --> 01:13:53,486
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
1345
01:14:02,163 --> 01:14:03,163
Hi.
1346
01:14:06,417 --> 01:14:07,834
[charges]
1347
01:14:09,837 --> 01:14:12,172
Why isn't it working?
Okay, again. Again.
1348
01:14:23,601 --> 01:14:24,601
Please.
1349
01:14:28,564 --> 01:14:31,483
[cracking]
1350
01:14:32,026 --> 01:14:34,319
Damn this thing.
Come on. Work. Work.
1351
01:14:34,320 --> 01:14:36,779
[scream]
Katie, hold on!
1352
01:14:37,114 --> 01:14:38,114
Damn it, come on!
1353
01:14:40,910 --> 01:14:41,910
No!
1354
01:14:47,875 --> 01:14:48,917
[tearing]
1355
01:14:52,505 --> 01:14:53,505
What's wrong with this thing?
1356
01:14:55,674 --> 01:14:56,674
Come on!
1357
01:14:56,759 --> 01:14:58,259
Uhh!
1358
01:14:59,970 --> 01:15:01,262
[gasps]
1359
01:15:07,561 --> 01:15:08,561
Please.
1360
01:15:10,564 --> 01:15:11,564
It's working.
1361
01:15:12,650 --> 01:15:13,650
Freeze!
1362
01:15:15,819 --> 01:15:16,819
Hold on, Katie.
1363
01:15:17,947 --> 01:15:18,947
Stand back.
1364
01:15:24,245 --> 01:15:25,245
KEVIN: Ha ha ha!
1365
01:15:28,290 --> 01:15:29,290
You're dust.
1366
01:15:31,710 --> 01:15:32,835
[electricity crackling]
1367
01:15:37,675 --> 01:15:38,675
KEVIN: It's working.
1368
01:15:38,926 --> 01:15:40,093
It's working.
It's great.
1369
01:15:40,594 --> 01:15:41,553
STEVE: It is?
1370
01:15:41,554 --> 01:15:42,720
Katie, come on down.
Katie.
1371
01:15:54,400 --> 01:15:55,650
KEVIN: Beautiful.
1372
01:15:56,986 --> 01:15:58,361
Yes.
1373
01:16:05,953 --> 01:16:07,453
It's working.
It's working!
1374
01:16:36,609 --> 01:16:37,609
KEVIN: It's over.
1375
01:16:38,110 --> 01:16:40,194
[sobs]
Hey. You okay?
1376
01:16:40,613 --> 01:16:42,947
It's all right.
It's over. It's okay.
1377
01:16:43,198 --> 01:16:44,157
It's okay.
[gasps]
1378
01:16:44,158 --> 01:16:45,158
Hi.
1379
01:16:45,659 --> 01:16:46,659
STEVE: Oh.
1380
01:16:48,120 --> 01:16:49,662
[Katie sobbing]
1381
01:16:58,839 --> 01:17:00,465
Mmm-uhh!
1382
01:17:01,342 --> 01:17:02,300
Okay, let's go.
1383
01:17:02,301 --> 01:17:04,344
Come on. Move 'em.
Move 'em. Move 'em.
1384
01:17:13,187 --> 01:17:14,604
DISPATCH: 1-3-9-9.
1385
01:17:14,980 --> 01:17:16,439
1300 Saturn.
1386
01:17:17,650 --> 01:17:18,650
What happened?
1387
01:17:18,734 --> 01:17:20,485
Some nut cases attacked the kids.
1388
01:17:20,486 --> 01:17:21,486
Murderers?
1389
01:17:22,071 --> 01:17:23,821
Maybe some escapees
from the loony bin.
1390
01:17:24,073 --> 01:17:25,531
I bet it's people from that hospital.
1391
01:17:26,158 --> 01:17:28,409
I always said they keep
crazy people up there.
1392
01:17:30,537 --> 01:17:31,788
STEVE:
This is all my fault.
1393
01:17:32,164 --> 01:17:33,164
No, it wasn't.
1394
01:17:34,249 --> 01:17:35,249
Yes, it was.
1395
01:17:36,710 --> 01:17:37,960
What can I say to make it better?
1396
01:17:39,254 --> 01:17:41,005
What do people say
when they screw up?
1397
01:17:43,092 --> 01:17:44,092
I'm sorry.
1398
01:17:44,259 --> 01:17:46,636
Hey, what are friends for, huh?
1399
01:17:51,183 --> 01:17:53,142
Why do I feel a song
coming on here?
1400
01:17:54,019 --> 01:17:55,395
[siren approaches]
1401
01:18:07,783 --> 01:18:09,325
Hey, isn't that Steve over there?
1402
01:18:10,577 --> 01:18:11,994
Thank God he's all right.
1403
01:18:19,086 --> 01:18:20,086
Uh-oh.
1404
01:18:21,922 --> 01:18:23,256
[birds chirping]
1405
01:18:33,058 --> 01:18:34,267
So who wants a ride to school?
1406
01:18:34,893 --> 01:18:35,935
I do. I do.
1407
01:18:36,437 --> 01:18:37,437
Where's Steve?
1408
01:18:40,441 --> 01:18:41,441
He's gone.
1409
01:18:41,942 --> 01:18:43,234
What do you mean gone?
Where?
1410
01:18:50,701 --> 01:18:51,701
He left this note.
1411
01:18:56,957 --> 01:18:59,959
STEVIE: Amigos, I screwed uproyally the other night
1412
01:19:00,335 --> 01:19:02,336
which is getting to bea habit with me.
1413
01:19:03,547 --> 01:19:05,047
I figure if I�m gonnachange my ways,
1414
01:19:05,048 --> 01:19:06,174
I'd better change my life,
1415
01:19:06,842 --> 01:19:08,176
so I'm off to see the world.
1416
01:19:09,219 --> 01:19:10,219
Hey. Lucky world, huh?
1417
01:19:11,305 --> 01:19:13,055
Anyhow, you two take care.
1418
01:19:13,474 --> 01:19:15,641
And P.S.,has any one ever told you two
1419
01:19:15,642 --> 01:19:17,018
you make an outrageous couple?
1420
01:19:18,312 --> 01:19:20,313
adios, Steve.
1421
01:19:20,314 --> 01:19:21,314
[dog barks]
1422
01:19:22,191 --> 01:19:23,441
Man, I'm gonna miss that guy.
1423
01:19:25,110 --> 01:19:26,110
Yeah. Me, too.
1424
01:19:39,833 --> 01:19:40,833
[Jasper growls]
1425
01:19:41,960 --> 01:19:42,960
WOMAN: Ride?
1426
01:19:47,049 --> 01:19:48,090
[snarling]
1427
01:19:52,095 --> 01:19:53,095
Shh.
1428
01:19:54,097 --> 01:19:55,556
I'm undercover. Shh.
1429
01:19:57,184 --> 01:19:58,184
[whimpers]
1430
01:19:58,435 --> 01:19:59,435
Shh.
1431
01:20:10,989 --> 01:20:12,490
Suppose we drive until dark
1432
01:20:12,491 --> 01:20:15,868
and stop somewhere
for a bite to eat.
1433
01:20:21,750 --> 01:20:25,378
SINGER: I am a hungry man!
1434
01:20:36,390 --> 01:20:37,390
# Ah-Mmm #
1435
01:20:52,739 --> 01:20:53,865
# The sun has set #
1436
01:20:54,283 --> 01:20:55,741
# Day begins to die #
1437
01:20:56,702 --> 01:20:57,743
# October moon #
1438
01:20:58,495 --> 01:20:59,954
# Climbin' in the sky #
1439
01:21:00,581 --> 01:21:01,581
# The time is here #
1440
01:21:01,832 --> 01:21:03,499
# Night of the undead #
1441
01:21:04,418 --> 01:21:05,626
# What's with the fear? #
1442
01:21:05,961 --> 01:21:07,420
# Hide beneath your bed #
1443
01:21:08,547 --> 01:21:09,881
# I'm a-walkin' #
1444
01:21:10,465 --> 01:21:12,425
# I'm a-talkin' #
1445
01:21:12,426 --> 01:21:13,926
# I'm a-stalkin' #
1446
01:21:13,927 --> 01:21:15,720
# Comin' to your room tonight #
1447
01:21:16,430 --> 01:21:17,555
# I will find you #
1448
01:21:18,223 --> 01:21:19,432
# Shadows blind you #
1449
01:21:20,183 --> 01:21:21,309
# Close behind you #
1450
01:21:21,643 --> 01:21:23,311
# Comin' over for a bite #
1451
01:21:25,480 --> 01:21:26,564
# Bud the C.H.U.D. #
1452
01:21:27,524 --> 01:21:28,524
# Bud the C.H.U.D. #
1453
01:21:29,359 --> 01:21:30,651
# Bud the C.H.U.D. #
1454
01:21:31,320 --> 01:21:32,361
# Bud the C.H.U.D. #
1455
01:21:40,495 --> 01:21:42,288
# Mm, there's no escape #
1456
01:21:42,748 --> 01:21:44,206
# I'm loose in the street #
1457
01:21:45,083 --> 01:21:48,127
# I'm dyin' for someone good to eat #
1458
01:21:49,004 --> 01:21:50,129
# I smell your blood #
1459
01:21:50,547 --> 01:21:51,964
# Burnin' in the night #
1460
01:21:52,883 --> 01:21:55,885
# You can't hold out
till the mornin' light #
1461
01:21:56,970 --> 01:21:58,137
# I'm a-walkin' #
1462
01:21:58,805 --> 01:22:00,139
# I'm a-talkin' #
1463
01:22:00,849 --> 01:22:02,016
# I'm a-stalkin' #
1464
01:22:02,309 --> 01:22:04,143
# Comin' to your room tonight #
1465
01:22:04,603 --> 01:22:05,853
# I will find you #
1466
01:22:06,647 --> 01:22:07,855
# Shadows blind you #
1467
01:22:08,690 --> 01:22:09,690
# Close behind you #
1468
01:22:10,067 --> 01:22:11,776
# Comin' over for a bite #
1469
01:22:13,946 --> 01:22:14,946
# Bud the C.H.U.D. #
1470
01:22:15,948 --> 01:22:16,948
# Bud the C.H.U.D. #
1471
01:22:17,866 --> 01:22:18,866
# Bud the C.H.U.D. #
1472
01:22:19,826 --> 01:22:20,868
# Bud the C.H.U.D. #
1473
01:24:42,344 --> 01:24:43,761
Good night.
1474
01:24:44,012 --> 01:24:45,221
[growls]
1475
01:24:46,305 --> 01:24:52,214
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