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1
00:00:00,667 --> 00:00:03,135
[horn honks]
2
00:00:03,137 --> 00:00:04,336
- GOD, I'M SO LATE.
3
00:00:04,338 --> 00:00:05,704
NOTHING.
4
00:00:05,706 --> 00:00:08,040
NOTHING.
[cell phone rings]
5
00:00:08,042 --> 00:00:10,609
HELLO.
- HI, THIS IS USA CREDIT.
6
00:00:10,611 --> 00:00:13,045
ACT NOW TO MINIMIZE YOUR DEBT.
JUST SAY YES.
7
00:00:13,047 --> 00:00:14,380
- YES, A SPOT!
8
00:00:14,382 --> 00:00:16,048
COME TO MOMMY!
- YOU SAID YES.
9
00:00:16,050 --> 00:00:19,218
[tires squealing, horn honking]
- NO, NO!
10
00:00:19,220 --> 00:00:21,020
THAT IS MY SPOT,
MINI COOPER.
11
00:00:21,022 --> 00:00:24,023
HELPING YOU TO TAKE ADVANTAGE
OF THIS AMAZING OFFER.
12
00:00:24,025 --> 00:00:26,125
- OH, YOU STUPID ASSHOLE.
13
00:00:26,127 --> 00:00:27,326
ARE YOU BLIND?
14
00:00:27,328 --> 00:00:29,161
- JUST IN MY LEFT EYE, MA'AM.
15
00:00:29,163 --> 00:00:30,529
- I'M NOT--
I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU, JOSH.
16
00:00:30,531 --> 00:00:31,797
I'M TALKING TO SPOT STEALER
OVER HERE.
17
00:00:31,799 --> 00:00:34,066
OH, AND SUCH
A DUMB PANTSUIT.
18
00:00:34,068 --> 00:00:36,702
LOOK AT THOSE PANTS.
THAT IS TERRIBLE.
19
00:00:36,704 --> 00:00:39,671
WHO WEARS THAT?
UGH, GROSS, UGLY PANTS.
20
00:00:39,673 --> 00:00:42,741
- YOUR PASSENGER WINDOW'S OPEN.
21
00:00:42,743 --> 00:00:46,078
- YEAH, YEAH, I'M JUST--
I'M WORKING ON A MONOLOGUE.
22
00:00:46,080 --> 00:00:48,213
I'M AN ACTOR.
IT'S FOR AN AUDITION.
23
00:00:48,215 --> 00:00:50,482
IT'S FOR A PLAY.
24
00:00:50,484 --> 00:00:52,084
CALLED UGLY PANTS.
25
00:00:52,086 --> 00:00:53,719
IT'S A ONE-ACT.
26
00:00:53,721 --> 00:00:54,820
- ONE SHOULD ACT NOW.
27
00:00:54,822 --> 00:00:56,388
- SHUT UP, JOSH.
28
00:00:56,390 --> 00:00:58,223
[elevator dings]
29
00:00:58,225 --> 00:00:59,691
OH, GOD.
- HEY, HEY, HEY.
30
00:00:59,693 --> 00:01:01,393
HEY, CAN YOU HOLD THAT, PLEASE?
31
00:01:01,395 --> 00:01:02,561
- OH, YEAH, YEP.
- HOLD IT.
32
00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:03,829
- I'M TRYING.
- JUST HOLD IT, PLEASE.
33
00:01:03,831 --> 00:01:05,397
- IT'S NOT WORKING.
I DON'T--
34
00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:06,398
- I KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE REALLY PUSHING,
35
00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:07,399
YOU SKINNY WHITE BI--
36
00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:09,535
- [groans]
37
00:01:09,537 --> 00:01:11,437
GOD, THIS DAY IS
ALREADY A DISASTER.
38
00:01:11,439 --> 00:01:13,505
THERE WAS SO MUCH TRAFFIC,
AND THERE WAS NO PARKING,
39
00:01:13,507 --> 00:01:15,274
AND THEN THIS--
THIS BIATCH SWOOPED ON IN
40
00:01:15,276 --> 00:01:17,209
AND TOOK THE ONLY SPOT.
41
00:01:17,211 --> 00:01:19,344
AND THEN I ONLY AVOIDED GETTING
SANDWICHED IN THE ELEVATOR
42
00:01:19,346 --> 00:01:23,115
BY CLOSING THE DOORS
ON THIS GIANT SWEATY MAN...
43
00:01:23,117 --> 00:01:25,384
AND HE'S RIGHT THERE.
44
00:01:25,386 --> 00:01:26,518
- HELLO.
45
00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:29,121
BURT IS ON EXTENDED DISABILITY.
46
00:01:29,123 --> 00:01:31,223
- A HEMORRHOID SURGERY
GONE WRONG, I HEARD.
47
00:01:31,225 --> 00:01:34,126
- I AM YOUR NEW BOSS,
GEOFFREY WITH A G.
48
00:01:34,128 --> 00:01:36,628
I'M PLEASED TO MEET
ALL BUT ONE OF YOU.
49
00:01:38,832 --> 00:01:40,232
- WELL, THINGS ARE LOOKING UP.
50
00:01:40,234 --> 00:01:41,867
- [murmurs mockingly]
51
00:01:41,869 --> 00:01:43,869
HEY, HI, GEOFFREY.
I'M NINA WHITLEY.
52
00:01:43,871 --> 00:01:45,871
I THINK THAT WE MIGHT HAVE
GOTTEN OFF ON THE WRONG FOOT.
53
00:01:45,873 --> 00:01:48,440
- UH-OH, I'M TRYING TO HOLD
THE DOOR, BUT I CAN'T.
54
00:01:48,442 --> 00:01:50,542
OH, NO, IT'S CLOSING.
55
00:01:50,544 --> 00:01:51,543
[groovy rock music]
56
00:01:51,545 --> 00:01:52,878
- ♪ HEY NOW
57
00:01:52,880 --> 00:01:55,881
♪
58
00:01:55,883 --> 00:01:57,816
♪ HEY NOW
59
00:01:59,452 --> 00:02:00,619
- YOU KNOW WHAT?
60
00:02:00,621 --> 00:02:02,121
AGAIN, I AM SO SORRY,
JOFFREY.
61
00:02:02,123 --> 00:02:04,156
- GEOFFREY,
LIKE THE TOYS"R"US GIRAFFE.
62
00:02:04,158 --> 00:02:07,126
- LIKE THE--
LIKE THE GIRAFFE, OKAY.
63
00:02:07,128 --> 00:02:08,627
- NINA, I'M SORRY.
64
00:02:08,629 --> 00:02:10,462
- THANKS, PHIL.
- OH, NO, I WASN'T FINISHED.
65
00:02:10,464 --> 00:02:12,297
I'M SORRY ANYONE TOLD YOU
YOU COULD PULL OFF THAT SCARF.
66
00:02:12,299 --> 00:02:14,233
- OH, THERE IT IS.
- OH, THAT'S A SCARF.
67
00:02:14,235 --> 00:02:15,634
- YEAH.
68
00:02:15,636 --> 00:02:17,236
- I THOUGHT YOU BAGGED
A WOOKIE.
69
00:02:17,238 --> 00:02:18,737
- IT IS A STATEMENT SCARF.
70
00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:20,139
- I THINK IT'S A QUESTION SCARF.
71
00:02:20,141 --> 00:02:20,906
LIKE, "WHY WOULD YOU WEAR ME?"
72
00:02:20,908 --> 00:02:22,141
- GOOD MORNING.
- HEY.
73
00:02:22,143 --> 00:02:23,442
NINA'S HAD A TOUGH MORNING.
74
00:02:23,444 --> 00:02:24,743
WE'RE MAKING FUN
OF HER SCARF.
75
00:02:24,745 --> 00:02:26,411
- OH, MY GRANDMOTHER
JUST CALLED.
76
00:02:26,413 --> 00:02:27,846
SHE WANTS
HER CURTAIN TASSELS BACK.
77
00:02:27,848 --> 00:02:28,914
- OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT?
78
00:02:28,916 --> 00:02:30,282
IT WOULD BE JUST REALLY GREAT
79
00:02:30,284 --> 00:02:32,518
IF JUST SOMETIMES
YOU GUYS COULD SAY,
80
00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:34,920
"HEY, NINA, I'M SO SORRY
THAT YOU'RE HAVING A ROUGH DAY."
81
00:02:34,922 --> 00:02:36,688
BUT NO, YOU GUYS JUST NEED
TO MAKE JOKES
82
00:02:36,690 --> 00:02:38,690
ABOUT HOW I'M FANCY AND UPTIGHT
83
00:02:38,692 --> 00:02:40,659
AND EDUCATED AND PRISSY,
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
84
00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:42,161
NOBODY GETS ME.
NONE OF YOU GET ME.
85
00:02:42,163 --> 00:02:44,163
NOBODY GETS ME.
- OH, NINA, I GET YOU.
86
00:02:44,165 --> 00:02:46,532
YOU'RE A STRONG,
HARDWORKING WOMAN
87
00:02:46,534 --> 00:02:48,534
WHO HAS
A SEVERE SCARF BLINDNESS.
88
00:02:48,536 --> 00:02:49,868
- HE GETS YOU.
- NO.
89
00:02:49,870 --> 00:02:52,771
YOU DON'T EVEN GET THAT
YOUR FRIEND CARLOS THERE
90
00:02:52,773 --> 00:02:54,173
IS SLEEPING AT THE OFFICE.
91
00:02:54,175 --> 00:02:55,541
- WHAT?
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
92
00:02:55,543 --> 00:02:57,176
- HE JUST SHAVED
IN THE BATHROOM,
93
00:02:57,178 --> 00:02:58,177
AND HE'S GOT A YOGA MAT
AND A PILLOW
94
00:02:58,179 --> 00:02:59,178
THAT HE BROUGHT TO WORK.
95
00:02:59,180 --> 00:03:00,679
HE CLEARLY DOESN'T DO YOGA.
96
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:02,347
IT DOESN'T TAKE
SCOOBY AND THE GANG
97
00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:06,385
- MY NEW PLACE WON'T BE
READY FOR A WEEK, SO...
98
00:03:06,387 --> 00:03:10,222
- UH, DO YOU--DO YOU WANT TO,
LIKE, STAY AT MY PLACE?
99
00:03:10,224 --> 00:03:12,558
- OH, MY GOD, YES,
PLEASE, THANK YOU.
100
00:03:15,395 --> 00:03:18,297
- HEADS UP, I HATE MY OUTFIT,
AND I'M HAVING A TERRIBLE DAY.
101
00:03:18,299 --> 00:03:19,698
BUT THAT BODES WELL FOR YOU,
102
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:21,833
- HEY, NINA,
DID YOU GET A CHANCE
103
00:03:21,835 --> 00:03:23,202
TO LOOK AT THAT NEW DISCOVERY?
104
00:03:23,204 --> 00:03:25,704
- WHAT NEW DISCOVERY?
- HMM.
105
00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:29,241
FORENSIC ANALYST EDIE PERCH
TO THE STAND.
106
00:03:32,912 --> 00:03:34,880
- GREAT.
107
00:03:34,882 --> 00:03:38,283
THIS IS GOOD
'CAUSE WE GO--WE GO WAY BACK.
108
00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:42,487
SO, MS. PERCH--
- EDIE.
109
00:03:42,489 --> 00:03:44,723
HOW WAS YOUR AUDITION?
- DIDN'T GET IT.
110
00:03:44,725 --> 00:03:46,692
SO I'M GONNA STICK
WITH THE LAWYERING.
111
00:03:46,694 --> 00:03:48,727
NOW, YOUR OPINION THAT
MY CLIENT WAS ON OPIATES,
112
00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,329
THAT'S JUST BASED
ON ONE SINGLE TEST?
113
00:03:50,331 --> 00:03:52,564
- YOU'RE REFERRING
TO THE U-TOX NINE?
114
00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:53,865
- UH, MAYBE--
115
00:03:53,867 --> 00:03:55,334
- BECAUSE THE U-TOX NINE IS,
116
00:03:55,336 --> 00:03:57,936
AS ITS NAME SUGGESTS,
NINE SMALLER TESTS.
117
00:03:57,938 --> 00:04:00,372
AND A POSITIVE FOR ANY
OF THOSE INDICATORS LEADS US
118
00:04:00,374 --> 00:04:02,241
TO RUN A TEST
FOR OPIATE METABOLITES,
119
00:04:02,243 --> 00:04:04,243
THEN GAS CHROMATOGRAPHY
AND MASS SPECTROMETRY,
120
00:04:04,245 --> 00:04:05,877
WHICH WE THEN DOUBLE CONFIRM.
121
00:04:05,879 --> 00:04:08,413
SO IT'S ACTUALLY MORE LIKE
26 TESTS, WHICH YOU CAN SEE
122
00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:11,750
IF YOU JUST FLIP
THE PAPER OVER, SWEETIE.
123
00:04:11,752 --> 00:04:13,252
- OKAY, AND NOW THESE--
THESE TESTS
124
00:04:13,254 --> 00:04:16,288
ARE--ARE REAL TESTS?
125
00:04:17,590 --> 00:04:20,592
NO FURTHER QUESTIONS.
126
00:04:20,594 --> 00:04:21,960
[all chuckling]
127
00:04:21,962 --> 00:04:23,762
GOD, THIS ISN'T HAPPENING.
128
00:04:23,764 --> 00:04:25,397
OH, YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.
IT'S BROKEN?
129
00:04:25,399 --> 00:04:27,266
HOW IS THE DEBIT MACHINE
BROKEN?
130
00:04:27,268 --> 00:04:30,035
LOOK, CAN I JUST OWE YOU?
- NO, KATHY, NO.
131
00:04:30,037 --> 00:04:31,536
- SEE,
WE'RE ON A FIRST-NAME BASIS.
132
00:04:31,538 --> 00:04:33,605
I MEAN, MY NAME'S NOT KATHY,
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
133
00:04:33,607 --> 00:04:35,607
YOU WRITE IT ON MY CUP
EVERY DAY.
134
00:04:35,609 --> 00:04:38,944
- I'LL PAY FOR IT.
- TOSS IT.
135
00:04:38,946 --> 00:04:40,946
- GIVE ME ONE OF THOSE
AS WELL, LARS.
136
00:04:40,948 --> 00:04:42,948
NO, I GET IT.
BAD DAY, YOU KNOW?
137
00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:44,883
YOU'RE JUST LIKE--
YOUR SPOT'S TAKEN.
138
00:04:44,885 --> 00:04:47,386
SURPRISE WITNESS
TOTALLY BLOWS YOUR CASE.
139
00:04:47,388 --> 00:04:48,954
IT'S LIKE
YOU'RE ONE OF THE BEFORE WOMEN
140
00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:50,289
IN A TAMPON COMMERCIAL.
141
00:04:50,291 --> 00:04:51,957
- YES, THANK YOU.
142
00:04:51,959 --> 00:04:53,625
I AM THAT WOMAN
IN THE WHITE PANTS
143
00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:55,060
RUNNING FOR THE CAB.
144
00:04:55,062 --> 00:04:56,928
- GIRL, I AM SORRY
YOU ARE HAVING A TERRIBLE DAY.
145
00:04:56,930 --> 00:04:58,997
- THANKS.
- [chuckles]
146
00:04:58,999 --> 00:05:01,466
APPARENTLY THAT SCARF
IS HAVING A GREAT DAY.
147
00:05:01,468 --> 00:05:02,901
- OH, THANK YOU.
148
00:05:02,903 --> 00:05:06,405
AND YOU WERE GREAT
ON THE STAND.
149
00:05:06,407 --> 00:05:07,806
YOU REALLY--YOU WERE GREAT.
- THANK YOU.
150
00:05:07,808 --> 00:05:09,808
- YEAH.
- THAT IS SO NICE.
151
00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:10,976
- WELL, I JUST WISH
IT HAD BEEN A DIFFERENT D.A.
152
00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:12,411
BECAUSE TRENT, MY EX,
HE JUST GETS
153
00:05:12,413 --> 00:05:14,579
THIS SPECIAL PLEASURE
OUT OF BEATING ME.
154
00:05:14,581 --> 00:05:15,847
- OH, MY GOD,
HE BEATS YOU?
155
00:05:15,849 --> 00:05:16,848
- NO, NO, NO, IN COURT.
156
00:05:16,850 --> 00:05:18,784
- YOU'RE THE CRAZY EX.
157
00:05:18,786 --> 00:05:20,652
- YEP, YEP.
- I'M SORRY.
158
00:05:20,654 --> 00:05:22,654
WHEN PEOPLE REFER
TO THEIR EXES AS CRAZY,
159
00:05:22,656 --> 00:05:25,691
IT'S LIKE, "HEY, MAYBE
YOU MADE THEM CRAZY, DUDE."
160
00:05:25,693 --> 00:05:26,958
- OH, MY GOD,
HE SO MADE ME CRAZY.
161
00:05:26,960 --> 00:05:28,960
- YEAH. MM-HMM.
- HE MADE ME--
162
00:05:28,962 --> 00:05:31,830
WOW, YOU JUST--YOU GET IT.
163
00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:34,433
YOU WANT TO GO GRAB LUNCH,
LIKE, RIGHT NOW?
164
00:05:34,435 --> 00:05:35,534
- HELL, YEAH.
165
00:05:35,536 --> 00:05:37,436
- YEAH? OKAY.
- YEAH.
166
00:05:38,705 --> 00:05:40,038
- THANK YOU
FOR LETTING ME STAY HERE.
167
00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:41,506
- ALL RIGHT,
MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME.
168
00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:42,874
- WHERE DO I PUT MY SHOES?
169
00:05:42,876 --> 00:05:44,776
- I DON'T CARE, BUD.
170
00:05:44,778 --> 00:05:47,612
- I'M GONNA PUT 'EM IN THE--
I JUST THREW THEM THERE, PHIL.
171
00:05:47,614 --> 00:05:49,014
[sports program in background]
172
00:05:49,016 --> 00:05:51,983
WHAT HAPPENED
TO YOUR WINDOW?
173
00:05:51,985 --> 00:05:54,786
- OH, POKER, DRINKS,
A HAND GOT LOST.
174
00:05:54,788 --> 00:05:56,388
YEAH, A GUY PUT
HIS FIST THROUGH IT.
175
00:05:56,390 --> 00:05:57,622
- YOU SHOULD MAKE HIM
PAY FOR IT.
176
00:05:57,624 --> 00:06:01,393
- THAT GUY MIGHT HAVE BEEN ME.
- OH. OH.
177
00:06:01,395 --> 00:06:02,994
[water running]
178
00:06:02,996 --> 00:06:04,463
PHIL?
- HMM?
179
00:06:04,465 --> 00:06:05,464
- HOW OFTEN DOES THIS--
180
00:06:05,466 --> 00:06:06,865
- ONLY WHEN I DO THIS.
181
00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:08,467
[water running]
SEE?
182
00:06:08,469 --> 00:06:10,035
- I SEE.
YOU'RE NOT GONNA FIX IT?
183
00:06:10,037 --> 00:06:12,537
- WELL, I WAS GONNA,
BUT THE DAMN WARRIORS
184
00:06:12,539 --> 00:06:13,739
COULDN'T COVER THE SPREAD, SO...
185
00:06:13,741 --> 00:06:15,040
- WHAT DO THE LADIES THINK?
186
00:06:15,042 --> 00:06:16,641
- USUALLY I GO
TO THEIR PLACE.
187
00:06:16,643 --> 00:06:17,909
- WHAT IF YOU START DATING
ONE OF THEM?
188
00:06:17,911 --> 00:06:20,846
- THEN I WON'T USE THE SINK.
189
00:06:20,848 --> 00:06:21,847
AND IF SHE'S GOT
A PROBLEM WITH THE WINDOW,
190
00:06:21,849 --> 00:06:24,082
I JUST...
[whistles]
191
00:06:24,084 --> 00:06:26,385
HUH.
I'M GONNA FIX THAT.
192
00:06:26,387 --> 00:06:28,487
- HOW MUCH DID YOU LOSE
ON THE WARRIORS GAME?
193
00:06:28,489 --> 00:06:30,589
- WHAT ARE WE,
DOING A QUARTERLY REPORT HERE?
194
00:06:30,591 --> 00:06:31,723
WE'RE GONNA WATCH THE GAME.
- YOU'RE RIGHT.
195
00:06:31,725 --> 00:06:32,858
YOU'RE RIGHT.
- COME ON.
196
00:06:32,860 --> 00:06:33,992
- I'M STARTING TO SOUND
LIKE ROSA.
197
00:06:33,994 --> 00:06:34,993
- LITTLE BIT.
198
00:06:34,995 --> 00:06:36,595
- LET'S JUST WATCH THE GAME
199
00:06:36,597 --> 00:06:38,063
AND NOT WORRY ABOUT WHATEVER
200
00:06:38,065 --> 00:06:40,432
IS POKING ME IN THE BACK.
201
00:06:40,434 --> 00:06:43,068
- OH, LOOK AT THAT.
IT'S A COUCH FORK.
202
00:06:43,070 --> 00:06:44,503
WHAT, YOU GO ALL THE WAY TO THE
KITCHEN WHEN YOU NEED A FORK?
203
00:06:44,505 --> 00:06:46,104
- NO.
204
00:06:46,906 --> 00:06:48,774
MY HEAD IS KILLING ME.
205
00:06:48,776 --> 00:06:50,609
- COUPLE BLACK COFFEES,
YOUR HEAD WILL BE FINE.
206
00:06:50,611 --> 00:06:52,677
- NO, IT'S FROM THAT PIECE
OF CEILING THAT FELL ON ME.
207
00:06:52,679 --> 00:06:56,014
- OH, YEAH, YEAH,
I'M GONNA FIX THAT.
208
00:06:56,016 --> 00:06:58,083
OH, HEY, NINA.
- OH, HEY, PHIL.
209
00:06:58,085 --> 00:07:00,085
OH, HEY, NINA,
IF YOUR COFFEE ORDER
210
00:07:00,087 --> 00:07:01,853
WASN'T SO HIGH-MAINTENANCE,
211
00:07:01,855 --> 00:07:04,055
MAYBE YOU WOULDN'T DIE ALONE
AND OTHER INSULTS.
212
00:07:04,057 --> 00:07:05,424
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.
213
00:07:05,426 --> 00:07:06,958
- TWO HALF-CAFS, ALMOND MILK,
RICE MILK,
214
00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:09,194
FOAM, AND TWO SHAKES OF CINNAMON
BEFORE THE THIRD SHOT,
215
00:07:09,196 --> 00:07:12,063
BUT NOT TOO HOT FOR KATHY.
- PERFECT.
216
00:07:12,065 --> 00:07:13,965
- OUR PLAN WAS TO APOLOGIZE
TO YOU, KATHY,
217
00:07:13,967 --> 00:07:15,767
BUT AFTER THAT COFFEE ORDER,
WOW,
218
00:07:15,769 --> 00:07:17,569
THAT IS A ONE-WAY TICKET
TO ALONE TOWN.
219
00:07:17,571 --> 00:07:18,937
- HEY, NINS.
- HEY.
220
00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:20,705
- HI!
- THIS IS FOR YOU.
221
00:07:20,707 --> 00:07:21,973
- THANK YOU.
222
00:07:21,975 --> 00:07:24,075
- GUYS, THIS IS
MY NEW BFF, EDIE.
223
00:07:24,077 --> 00:07:25,710
OH, MY GOD,
I JUST SAID BFF.
224
00:07:25,712 --> 00:07:26,945
IS THAT TOO SOON?
- ARE WE LABELING UP?
225
00:07:26,947 --> 00:07:28,480
I LOVE THAT.
- ME TOO.
226
00:07:28,482 --> 00:07:29,781
- WAIT, WAIT.
DON'T TELL ME.
227
00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:32,117
YOU MUST BE PHIL, CLASS CLOWN,
228
00:07:32,119 --> 00:07:34,586
COASTING THROUGH LIFE
ON WHAT HE THINKS IS CHARM.
229
00:07:34,588 --> 00:07:36,922
AND CARLOS?
YOGA MAT.
230
00:07:36,924 --> 00:07:38,590
- YOU NAILED IT.
231
00:07:38,592 --> 00:07:39,925
- HEY, PHIL, HOW'S IT GOING?
- OOH.
232
00:07:39,927 --> 00:07:41,493
OKAY, YOU GOT ME ON THIS.
233
00:07:41,495 --> 00:07:42,761
WHO'S THE ANEMIC IN THE VEST?
234
00:07:42,763 --> 00:07:43,962
- FARLEY.
235
00:07:43,964 --> 00:07:45,831
GAMING ASSOCIATE OF PHIL'S.
236
00:07:45,833 --> 00:07:47,065
- UH-HUH,
SO THIS IS PHIL'S BOOKIE
237
00:07:47,067 --> 00:07:48,667
WHICH IS NEW INFORMATION TO ME,
238
00:07:48,669 --> 00:07:51,102
BUT NOT AT ALL SURPRISING.
239
00:07:51,104 --> 00:07:52,137
YOU'RE DOING GREAT, BUDDY.
240
00:07:52,139 --> 00:07:54,005
- WHAT?
241
00:07:54,007 --> 00:07:55,774
- OH, NICE LADY.
242
00:07:55,776 --> 00:07:57,943
- SO, PHIL, LOOKS LIKE
YOU OWE ME SOME MONEY
243
00:07:57,945 --> 00:08:00,245
FROM THE KNICKS GAME LAST NIGHT.
244
00:08:00,247 --> 00:08:02,848
- DON'T WORRY.
I'LL FIX THAT TOO.
245
00:08:04,517 --> 00:08:07,986
- HEY, YOU EVER WATCH
JUDGE JUDY?
246
00:08:07,988 --> 00:08:09,488
- NO.
247
00:08:09,490 --> 00:08:11,056
- BEING A LAWYER,
YOU SHOULD WATCH THAT.
248
00:08:16,996 --> 00:08:18,697
- CAN WE TALK ABOUT
WHAT JUST HAPPENED?
249
00:08:18,699 --> 00:08:20,265
BECAUSE AS A FRIEND,
I'M CONCERNED.
250
00:08:20,267 --> 00:08:22,567
YOU JUST HAD A BOOKIE
TRACK YOU DOWN AT WORK.
251
00:08:22,569 --> 00:08:23,869
WHAT'S NEXT?
252
00:08:23,871 --> 00:08:25,537
I'M OPENING UP A BOX
WITH YOUR THUMBS IN IT?
253
00:08:25,539 --> 00:08:27,639
- FARLEY, THE GUY--
COME ON, HE'S HARMLESS.
254
00:08:27,641 --> 00:08:30,275
AND WHY ARE YOU OPENING
A BOX OF MY THUMBS?
255
00:08:30,277 --> 00:08:32,143
- BECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE THUMBS,
256
00:08:32,145 --> 00:08:35,514
BECAUSE THEY HIRE GOONS TO CUT--
AND PUT THEM IN THE--
257
00:08:35,516 --> 00:08:36,515
- YOU'VE SEEN TOO MANY MOVIES.
258
00:08:36,517 --> 00:08:38,617
WAIT, WHY ARE
YOU JUDGING ME?
259
00:08:38,619 --> 00:08:41,052
I MEAN, YOU SLEEP ON A YOGA MAT
NEAR THE MISDEMEANOR FILES.
260
00:08:41,054 --> 00:08:42,654
- THAT'S HURTFUL, OKAY?
261
00:08:42,656 --> 00:08:44,589
PHIL, EVERYONE GETS IT.
262
00:08:44,591 --> 00:08:46,057
YOU'RE THE COOL GUY,
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
263
00:08:46,059 --> 00:08:48,059
THERE IS A LINE, AND YOU
WON'T KNOW YOU CROSSED IT
264
00:08:48,061 --> 00:08:49,561
TILL THE GOONS SHOW UP.
265
00:08:49,563 --> 00:08:50,729
- OKAY.
266
00:08:50,731 --> 00:08:52,631
WELL, I THINK
I JUST CROSSED IT.
267
00:08:52,633 --> 00:08:54,666
- WHATEVER THAT MEANS.
- IT MEANS YOU'RE A GOON.
268
00:08:54,668 --> 00:08:57,302
'CAUSE YOU KNOW
WHAT I JUST REALIZED?
269
00:08:57,304 --> 00:09:00,639
WE'RE NOT REAL FRIENDS.
NO, WE'RE WORK FRIENDS.
270
00:09:00,641 --> 00:09:03,575
YOU'RE JUST THE OFFICE
SMART-ASS WHO GAMBLES AND JOKES,
271
00:09:03,577 --> 00:09:05,610
AND I'M THE OFFICE...
272
00:09:05,612 --> 00:09:07,312
- TIGHT-ASS.
- ALPHA, WHO WORKS HARD.
273
00:09:07,314 --> 00:09:08,713
YOU JUST PROVED MY POINT.
SEE?
274
00:09:08,715 --> 00:09:11,616
THOSE TWO TYPES,
THEY DON'T MIX.
275
00:09:11,618 --> 00:09:14,219
SO WE'RE GONNA JUST BE
SIMPLE WORK FRIENDS,
276
00:09:14,221 --> 00:09:16,721
AND THEN I'M GONNA BE LIKE,
"HEY, TOUGH CASE TODAY, HUH?"
277
00:09:16,723 --> 00:09:19,591
- AND I'LL BE LIKE,
"UGH, I HATE MONDAYS."
278
00:09:19,593 --> 00:09:21,259
- SO WORK FRIENDS.
279
00:09:21,261 --> 00:09:23,662
- WORK FRIENDS.
- YEAH.
280
00:09:25,731 --> 00:09:28,934
SOMEBODY BROUGHT US A TREAT,
'CAUSE I MIGHT HAVE
281
00:09:28,936 --> 00:09:30,769
JUST GOTTEN THE BEST
BLACK AND WHITE COOKIE
282
00:09:30,771 --> 00:09:32,103
YOU'VE EVER TASTED.
283
00:09:32,105 --> 00:09:33,872
IT IS GONNA MELT
YOUR FACE OFF.
284
00:09:33,874 --> 00:09:35,907
- I AM MAKING OUT WITH YOU
SO HARD IN MY MIND RIGHT NOW.
285
00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:37,776
- [laughs]
286
00:09:37,778 --> 00:09:39,611
- WELL, I HAVE
A LITTLE SURPRISE FOR YOU.
287
00:09:39,613 --> 00:09:40,712
OKAY. GOOD NEWS.
288
00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:42,581
YOUR NEXT CASE,
THE LABS CAME IN.
289
00:09:42,583 --> 00:09:44,649
METABOLITES, GAS CHROME,
MASS SPEC,
290
00:09:44,651 --> 00:09:45,951
ALL CAME BACK NEGATIVE.
291
00:09:45,953 --> 00:09:47,619
- NO IDEA WHAT YOU JUST SAID,
292
00:09:47,621 --> 00:09:50,255
BUT LOVING HOW EXCITED
YOU ARE ABOUT THIS.
293
00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:52,357
- YOUR CLIENT'S AS CLEAN
AS AN OTTER'S NUTS.
294
00:09:52,359 --> 00:09:54,626
- OH!
- YOU ARE GONNA RIP TRENT'S ASS.
295
00:09:54,628 --> 00:09:56,261
- OH, MY GOD.
296
00:09:56,263 --> 00:09:57,762
YOU ARE THE BEST.
- THANK YOU.
297
00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:59,731
- YEAH.
- THANK YOU.
298
00:09:59,733 --> 00:10:01,633
- I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HIS
"I JUST GOT WHUPPED" FACE.
299
00:10:01,635 --> 00:10:03,602
IT'S GONNA BE LIKE,
"BUT I--I OWN--I--"
300
00:10:03,604 --> 00:10:04,736
- OR MORE LIKE, "HUH."
301
00:10:04,738 --> 00:10:07,272
- COWORKER, BFF.
WATERCOOLER STUFF.
302
00:10:07,274 --> 00:10:08,740
- PRINTER'S MAKING ME CRAZY.
303
00:10:08,742 --> 00:10:10,976
- THEY DO.
THEY MAKE YOU VERY CRAZY.
304
00:10:10,978 --> 00:10:13,745
- ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU.
- HEY, PHIL.
305
00:10:13,747 --> 00:10:16,748
BUDDY, I WANTED TO APOLOGIZE.
I OVERREACTED.
306
00:10:16,750 --> 00:10:18,750
IT'S YOUR LIFESTYLE.
I GET IT, AND I AM SORRY.
307
00:10:18,752 --> 00:10:20,652
- HEY, IT'S NO PROBLEM,
ALL RIGHT?
308
00:10:20,654 --> 00:10:23,388
AND I WILL GET THAT DRIP
AND STUFF FIXED.
309
00:10:23,390 --> 00:10:27,292
- SPEAKING OF WHICH,
I KNOW THIS GUY
310
00:10:27,294 --> 00:10:28,893
WHO USED TO BE
A CLIENT OF MINE.
311
00:10:28,895 --> 00:10:31,696
HE CAN HELP YOU.
- LOOK AT YOU.
312
00:10:31,698 --> 00:10:32,731
"I KNOW A GUY."
313
00:10:32,733 --> 00:10:34,265
I LIKE THIS CARLOS.
314
00:10:37,870 --> 00:10:40,672
- JIMMY, TELL MY BUDDY
WHAT YOU TOLD ME EARLIER.
315
00:10:40,674 --> 00:10:42,907
- SO THERE'S THIS NAG.
- THAT'S A HORSE.
316
00:10:42,909 --> 00:10:44,709
- RED HEADED STEP CHILD.
317
00:10:44,711 --> 00:10:47,412
SECOND RACE TOMORROW,
ODDS-ON FAVORITE, THREE TO ONE.
318
00:10:47,414 --> 00:10:49,280
I HAPPEN TO KNOW
RED HEADED STEP CHILD
319
00:10:49,282 --> 00:10:51,316
HAS FALLEN HARD
FOR IT'S MY PARTY.
320
00:10:51,318 --> 00:10:52,417
IT'S TRUE LOVE.
321
00:10:52,419 --> 00:10:54,786
BUT IT'S MY PARTY
PULLED A WITHER.
322
00:10:54,788 --> 00:10:57,689
SO RED HEADED STEP CHILD IS
GONNA FOLLOW HER BELOVED
323
00:10:57,691 --> 00:10:58,957
ALL THE WAY TO LAST PLACE.
324
00:10:58,959 --> 00:11:00,625
- SO WHAT'S THE TIP HERE?
325
00:11:00,627 --> 00:11:04,329
- THERE'S ANOTHER HORSE,
GUILTY AS CHARGED.
326
00:11:04,331 --> 00:11:05,864
HEH?
327
00:11:05,866 --> 00:11:07,799
I GOT IT ON GOOD AUTHORITY
THAT HORSE IS JUICING.
328
00:11:07,801 --> 00:11:09,734
SHE HEARS THE STARTING GUN,
SHE'S GONNA MERGE
329
00:11:09,736 --> 00:11:10,869
ONTO THE GODDAMN
SAN DIEGO FREEWAY.
330
00:11:10,871 --> 00:11:12,737
[both laugh]
331
00:11:12,739 --> 00:11:15,674
WHAT KIND OF ODDS ARE
WE TALKING ON HER HERE?
332
00:11:15,676 --> 00:11:17,442
- I'M TALKING 50.
- 50?
333
00:11:17,444 --> 00:11:19,010
- [mouths word]
- 50 TO 1?
334
00:11:19,012 --> 00:11:21,312
- RIGHT?
- WOW.
335
00:11:21,314 --> 00:11:23,448
- OH, GOD, I LOVE HORSES.
336
00:11:23,450 --> 00:11:25,850
- THAT'S KIND OF WHY
YOU'RE IN HERE, JIMMY.
337
00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:29,754
- EH.
- 50 TO 1?
338
00:11:29,756 --> 00:11:32,757
WOW.
339
00:11:32,759 --> 00:11:34,759
- ARE WE BETTING AN H-NOTE?
A HUNDY?
340
00:11:34,761 --> 00:11:36,695
- NO. MORE.
50 TO 1.
341
00:11:36,697 --> 00:11:38,763
I'M TALKING A G-NOTE.
THAT'S A GRAND.
342
00:11:38,765 --> 00:11:39,831
THAT'S A THOUSAND.
YEAH.
343
00:11:39,833 --> 00:11:41,466
- WHOA.
- WHAT? YOU HEARD YOUR GUY.
344
00:11:41,468 --> 00:11:43,068
IT'S A SURE THING.
345
00:11:43,070 --> 00:11:44,469
I MEAN, YOU KNOW,
FORGET THE HOLE.
346
00:11:44,471 --> 00:11:46,838
WE'RE GONNA GET MATCHING BOATS
AND CAPTAINS HATS AND--
347
00:11:46,840 --> 00:11:49,240
I WILL FIX THE HOLE TOO,
BUT I DON'T KNOW,
348
00:11:49,242 --> 00:11:50,809
MAYBE I'LL GET
A WHOLE NEW HOUSE, YOU KNOW?
349
00:11:50,811 --> 00:11:53,344
A BOAT HOUSE IN CAPE COD.
350
00:11:53,346 --> 00:11:54,779
YOU A COD MAN, HUH?
351
00:11:54,781 --> 00:11:55,714
- I THINK PEOPLE
CALL IT THE CAPE.
352
00:11:55,716 --> 00:11:57,415
- NOT AFTER WE BUY IT.
353
00:11:59,952 --> 00:12:01,920
- THE DEFENSE PLEADS
NOT GUILTY, YOUR HONOR.
354
00:12:01,922 --> 00:12:03,788
- I'M SORRY, WHAT?
REALLY?
355
00:12:03,790 --> 00:12:05,090
ARE WE TALKING
ABOUT THE SAME GUY?
356
00:12:05,092 --> 00:12:07,425
- YOU SEEM SCARED, TRENT.
AND YOU SHOULD BE.
357
00:12:07,427 --> 00:12:08,927
- UH-OH.
358
00:12:08,929 --> 00:12:10,762
- I'LL SEE YOU AT
THE READINESS HEARING.
359
00:12:10,764 --> 00:12:13,064
- [clears throat]
- SO NO DEALS?
360
00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:14,499
WE'RE GOING TO TRIAL?
- YEAH.
361
00:12:14,501 --> 00:12:16,901
YOUR DRUG TEST CAME BACK
CLEAN AS AN OTTER'S BALLS.
362
00:12:16,903 --> 00:12:19,104
- IS THAT CLEAN?
OH, YEAH, RIGHT.
363
00:12:19,106 --> 00:12:21,773
'CAUSE THEY'RE IN THE WATER
ALL THE TIME SWIMMING AROUND.
364
00:12:21,775 --> 00:12:23,274
WOW!
- YEAH.
365
00:12:23,276 --> 00:12:25,777
- THAT IS INCREDIBLE,
'CAUSE I WAS HIGH AS SH--.
366
00:12:25,779 --> 00:12:29,114
- YOU WERE HIGH?
- AS SH--.
367
00:12:29,116 --> 00:12:32,417
YOU'RE AN AWESOME LAWYER.
- UH...
368
00:12:32,419 --> 00:12:33,885
EH...
369
00:12:38,524 --> 00:12:41,226
- HEY, EDIE.
- OH, NINA.
370
00:12:41,228 --> 00:12:43,027
HOW AWESOME WAS THAT?
- YEAH.
371
00:12:43,029 --> 00:12:45,096
- I JUST LOVED
HOW YOU TOOK TRENT DOWN.
372
00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:47,899
HIS FACE WAS LIKE, "HUH?"
OR MORE LIKE, "UHH."
373
00:12:47,901 --> 00:12:49,901
[both laugh]
374
00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:53,271
- YEAH, UM, SO ABOUT THAT,
375
00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:56,941
YOU DON'T THINK THERE'S ANY WAY
THAT MAYBE YOU--
376
00:12:56,943 --> 00:12:58,810
NOT--OKAY, NOT YOU-YOU,
377
00:12:58,812 --> 00:13:01,312
BUT, LIKE, TECHNOLOGY-YOU
MIGHT HAVE MADE AN ERROR?
378
00:13:01,314 --> 00:13:04,048
WITHOUT VIOLATING
ATTORNEY-CLIENT PRIVILEGE,
379
00:13:04,050 --> 00:13:06,918
WE BOTH KNOW THAT MY CLIENT
WAS A BIG ENTHUSIAST
380
00:13:06,920 --> 00:13:11,055
OF THE OLD EL GUSTAEL COCAINA PLANT.
381
00:13:11,057 --> 00:13:13,324
- MAYBE I FUDGED IT.
- WHAT?
382
00:13:13,326 --> 00:13:14,492
- ISN'T THAT
WHAT YOU WANTED?
383
00:13:14,494 --> 00:13:16,427
- NO.
OH, GOD, NO.
384
00:13:16,429 --> 00:13:18,797
OKAY, SO WE JUST GOT--WE GOT
TO WITHDRAW THAT EVIDENCE.
385
00:13:18,799 --> 00:13:20,932
- NO, NO, MY REPUTATION
WOULD BE RUINED.
386
00:13:20,934 --> 00:13:22,000
MY REPUTATION IS EVERYTHING.
387
00:13:22,002 --> 00:13:23,501
NO, YOU HAVE TO
GO THROUGH WITH IT.
388
00:13:23,503 --> 00:13:25,103
YOU HAVE TO GO TO TRIAL.
YOU HAVE TO.
389
00:13:25,105 --> 00:13:27,272
[elevator dings]
- I DON'T--HOW--
390
00:13:27,274 --> 00:13:28,907
- MIRANDA WOULD DO IT
FOR CARRIE.
391
00:13:28,909 --> 00:13:30,408
- WOULD SHE?
- YES!
392
00:13:32,178 --> 00:13:34,813
- DID YOU PLACE THE BET?
- YEP, JUST HANDED IT OVER.
393
00:13:34,815 --> 00:13:36,114
"TWO BETS, PLEASE."
ALL THAT MONEY.
394
00:13:36,116 --> 00:13:37,949
- WHAT ARE YOU GONNA
NAME YOUR BOAT?
395
00:13:37,951 --> 00:13:39,584
I'M GONNA NAME MINE PIZZA
BECAUSE I LOVE PIZZA.
396
00:13:39,586 --> 00:13:40,852
HEY, GEOFFREY.
- YES.
397
00:13:40,854 --> 00:13:42,287
- WE'RE GETTING A BOAT.
398
00:13:42,289 --> 00:13:43,521
WHAT WOULD YOU
NAME YOUR BOAT?
399
00:13:43,523 --> 00:13:45,423
- WHY AREN'T YOU WORKING?
400
00:13:45,425 --> 00:13:48,193
[cell phone ringing]
401
00:13:48,195 --> 00:13:49,994
- YOUR BOOKIE.
- YEAH.
402
00:13:49,996 --> 00:13:55,099
- NO, LET'S WAIT TILL
THE HORSE GETS OUT OF THE GATE.
403
00:13:55,101 --> 00:13:57,101
- YOUR BOOKIE?
EVERYTHING OKAY?
404
00:13:57,103 --> 00:13:58,469
- YEAH.
EVERYTHING'S FINE, TAPPY.
405
00:13:58,471 --> 00:13:59,971
YOU?
- YEAH.
406
00:13:59,973 --> 00:14:01,840
NO, I'M GOOD.
EVERYTHING--YOU KNOW WHAT?
407
00:14:01,842 --> 00:14:03,441
ACTUALLY, THIS MIGHT FALL
UNDER THE CATEGORY
408
00:14:03,443 --> 00:14:06,945
OF WORK DILEMMA, SO LET ME
THROW IT TO YOU, COLLEAGUE.
409
00:14:06,947 --> 00:14:08,446
HAVE YOU EVER HAD
A CASE GO YOUR WAY
410
00:14:08,448 --> 00:14:11,149
BUT THE EVIDENCE IS MAYBE...
[stammering]
411
00:14:11,151 --> 00:14:12,617
FUDGED-ISH?
[cell phone ringing]
412
00:14:12,619 --> 00:14:15,053
- YEAH. ASK FOR A RETRIAL.
IT'S EASY.
413
00:14:15,055 --> 00:14:17,055
- WHAT IF THE PERSON WHO'S
RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS EVIDENCE
414
00:14:17,057 --> 00:14:19,023
IS A FRIEND WHO--
WHO JUST KIND OF--
415
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:21,159
WHO GETS YOU, AND BY DOING THIS,
YOU'RE GONNA--
416
00:14:21,161 --> 00:14:24,162
THERE'S GONNA BE
SOME SEVERE LIFE CONSEQUENCES?
417
00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:25,964
[cell phone ringing]
- MAYBE ASK YOUR NEW BESTIE.
418
00:14:25,966 --> 00:14:28,199
- YEAH, THAT SOLVES SO MUCH.
THANKS.
419
00:14:36,275 --> 00:14:37,876
- YOUR HONOR,
THIS MAN WAS FOUND
420
00:14:37,878 --> 00:14:40,478
LITERALLY COVERED IN COCAINE,
421
00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:44,015
YET HIS BLOOD TESTED NEGATIVE
FOR COCAINE.
422
00:14:44,017 --> 00:14:46,351
THE PEOPLE HAVE NO CHOICE
BUT TO DROP ALL CHARGES.
423
00:14:46,353 --> 00:14:47,919
[desk squeaks]
424
00:14:47,921 --> 00:14:50,188
- ASSUMING THIS IS FINE
WITH THE DEFENSE?
425
00:14:50,190 --> 00:14:53,524
- WELL, YOU KNOW,
TESTS DON'T LIE.
426
00:14:53,526 --> 00:14:56,327
- OKAY, JUST--
JUST BEFORE WE BREAK,
427
00:14:56,329 --> 00:14:59,597
I'D JUST LIKE TO SAY
A FEW BRIEF WORDS ABOUT JUSTICE.
428
00:14:59,599 --> 00:15:03,101
YOU KNOW,
IT'S A BEAUTIFUL THING, JUSTICE.
429
00:15:03,103 --> 00:15:05,203
HELLO, FRASIER MIDDLE SCHOOL.
430
00:15:05,205 --> 00:15:07,038
I HOPE YOU GUYS HAVE ALL
ENJOYED YOUR CLASS TRIP
431
00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:08,339
TO SEE JUSTICE IN ACTION.
432
00:15:08,341 --> 00:15:09,440
WHAT DO YOU SAY, KIDS?
433
00:15:09,442 --> 00:15:10,675
HOW'S ABOUT A ROUND OF APPLAUSE
434
00:15:10,677 --> 00:15:11,943
FOR OUR SYSTEM OF JUSTICE?
435
00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:13,678
[cheers and applause]
436
00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:17,048
- AND FOR THE APPARENTLY
UNDETECTABLE COCAINE.
437
00:15:17,050 --> 00:15:18,082
- YEAH.
438
00:15:18,084 --> 00:15:24,956
[cheers and applause]
439
00:15:24,958 --> 00:15:26,124
- LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
OF THE JURY,
440
00:15:26,126 --> 00:15:27,625
THE PROSECUTION HAS TRIED
TO PAINT
441
00:15:27,627 --> 00:15:29,961
A VERY DARK PICTURE
OF MY CLIENT.
442
00:15:29,963 --> 00:15:34,599
THEY'VE USED SUCH WORDS AS
IRRESPONSIBLE, NEGLIGENT.
443
00:15:34,601 --> 00:15:35,967
[quietly]
RED HEADED STEP CHILD?
444
00:15:35,969 --> 00:15:38,469
OH, COME ON.
COME ON.
445
00:15:38,471 --> 00:15:40,138
RED HEADED STEP CHILD.
446
00:15:40,140 --> 00:15:41,539
THAT IS NO WAY TO
SLANDER MY CLIENT.
447
00:15:41,541 --> 00:15:45,109
HE DOESN'T EVEN
HAVE RED HAIR.
448
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:47,979
- MR. QUINLAN.
- YEAH, YES.
449
00:15:47,981 --> 00:15:51,082
YOU SAW THE EVIDENCE.
450
00:15:51,084 --> 00:15:52,951
IT'S MY PARTY?
OH, COME ON, BABY.
451
00:15:52,953 --> 00:15:55,253
COME ON, RUN, RUN.
RUN, BABY.
452
00:15:55,255 --> 00:15:57,322
RUN, YOU BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL--
- MR. QUINLAN!
453
00:15:57,324 --> 00:15:59,257
- YOU BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE,
YOU BEAUTIFUL JURY.
454
00:15:59,259 --> 00:16:00,491
YOU'RE SO BEAUTIFUL WHEN YOU--
455
00:16:00,493 --> 00:16:02,427
- MR. QUINLAN,
YOU GONNA GIVE YOUR CLOSING
456
00:16:02,429 --> 00:16:04,062
OR PLAY ANGRY BIRDS?
457
00:16:04,064 --> 00:16:07,966
- OH, DEAR GOD.
DEAR GOD.
458
00:16:07,968 --> 00:16:10,101
COME ON, MY CLIENT--
MY CLIENT IS A GOOD CLIENT.
459
00:16:10,103 --> 00:16:11,436
HE'S A GOOD CLIENT.
460
00:16:11,438 --> 00:16:14,072
AND YOU ARE CERTAINLY
GOING TO RULE
461
00:16:14,074 --> 00:16:16,074
THAT MY CLIENT IS...
462
00:16:17,343 --> 00:16:18,676
GUILTY AS CHARGED!
463
00:16:18,678 --> 00:16:21,112
YES!
464
00:16:21,114 --> 00:16:24,349
I MEAN, NOT GUILTY AS CHARGED.
465
00:16:24,351 --> 00:16:26,684
NOT GUILTY.
466
00:16:26,686 --> 00:16:28,486
WHOO!
I GOT SOME MONEY.
467
00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:30,254
I GOT SOME--WHAT A DAY!
468
00:16:30,256 --> 00:16:32,757
AH, DESK GIN, THE GOOD STUFF,
IT'S ON ME.
469
00:16:32,759 --> 00:16:34,258
LET'S GO.
PRESENTS FOR EVERYBODY.
470
00:16:34,260 --> 00:16:36,494
BOSS MAN, I'M BUYING YOU
YOUR OWN ELEVATOR.
471
00:16:36,496 --> 00:16:38,096
- DO YOU ACTUALLY
WORK HERE?
472
00:16:38,098 --> 00:16:39,697
'CAUSE I'VE NEVER
SEEN YOU DO ANYTHING.
473
00:16:39,699 --> 00:16:41,466
- LARRY, HEY,
ANYTHING YOU WANT.
474
00:16:41,468 --> 00:16:44,102
WHAT WOULD YOU WANT?
- TO MEET MY REAL FATHER.
475
00:16:44,104 --> 00:16:46,771
- SEE WHAT I CAN DO.
CARLOS, MY MAN.
476
00:16:46,773 --> 00:16:48,539
- PHIL.
- YEAH.
477
00:16:48,541 --> 00:16:50,008
- HEY.
- WHAT'S UP, FARLEY?
478
00:16:50,010 --> 00:16:51,209
OH, I GET IT.
479
00:16:51,211 --> 00:16:53,111
LOOK AT YOU COMING DOWN HERE
TO MY WORK
480
00:16:53,113 --> 00:16:54,479
TO INTIMIDATE ME
WITH YOUR GOON.
481
00:16:54,481 --> 00:16:56,781
I GET IT.
I GOT YOUR MONEY.
482
00:16:56,783 --> 00:16:58,216
OH, YEAH. YEAH.
483
00:16:58,218 --> 00:16:59,784
I'M GONNA FLOAT IT TO YOU
ON MY BOAT.
484
00:16:59,786 --> 00:17:01,319
ALL RIGHT?
RIGHT TO YOUR BOAT.
485
00:17:01,321 --> 00:17:02,787
THE USS FARLEY
CAN SUCK--
486
00:17:02,789 --> 00:17:04,655
- PHIL!
487
00:17:04,657 --> 00:17:08,393
I DIDN'T PLACE THE BET.
488
00:17:08,395 --> 00:17:10,028
- YOU EXCUSE ME?
489
00:17:10,030 --> 00:17:11,562
I JUST GOT SOME BOAT
BUSINESS TO TALK ABOUT.
490
00:17:11,564 --> 00:17:14,165
- YEAH.
491
00:17:14,167 --> 00:17:16,034
- I'M SORRY, YOU DIDN'T--
492
00:17:16,036 --> 00:17:18,569
YOU DIDN'T PLACE THE BET,
THE SURE THING?
493
00:17:18,571 --> 00:17:20,038
- THERE WAS NO SURE THING.
494
00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:22,040
I GAVE JIMMY
A CARTON OF CIGARETTES
495
00:17:22,042 --> 00:17:23,141
TO GIVE YOU A FALSE TIP
496
00:17:23,143 --> 00:17:24,809
SO YOU WOULD
BET BIG AND LOSE.
497
00:17:24,811 --> 00:17:26,344
- BUT I--I WON.
- I KNOW!
498
00:17:26,346 --> 00:17:27,645
WHAT THE HELL?
THOSE ODDS!
499
00:17:27,647 --> 00:17:29,714
- YEAH! 50 TO 1.
- THAT'S WHY I PICKED IT.
500
00:17:29,716 --> 00:17:31,215
I WAS TRYING TO TEACH YOU
A LESSON.
501
00:17:31,217 --> 00:17:34,052
- BUT I WON.
- OKAY, THE LESSON DIDN'T TAKE.
502
00:17:34,054 --> 00:17:35,753
- I WAS GONNA BUY
A GODDAMN BOAT.
503
00:17:35,755 --> 00:17:37,688
I GONNA GET A HOUSE
ON THE COD.
504
00:17:37,690 --> 00:17:39,323
I WAS GONNA DO THAT--
THAT VIRGIN SPACESHIP--
505
00:17:39,325 --> 00:17:41,059
WHY WOULD YOU MAKE THAT UP?
506
00:17:41,061 --> 00:17:43,561
- BECAUSE YOU JUST LISTED, LIKE,
$3 MILLION WORTH OF STUFF,
507
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:46,764
AND NONE OF IT WAS
FIXING YOUR APARTMENT.
508
00:17:46,766 --> 00:17:49,400
- HEY, LOOK, PHIL, IF COULD
WE JUST HAVE A MINUTE--
509
00:17:49,402 --> 00:17:52,070
- GOOD SIR, IF YOUR UGLY GOON
510
00:17:52,072 --> 00:17:54,672
IS GOING TO BREAK ANYONE'S LEGS,
LET THEM BE MINE.
511
00:17:54,674 --> 00:17:56,340
- OKAY, LISTEN.
512
00:17:56,342 --> 00:17:58,376
NO UGLY GOON HAS TO BREAK
ANYBODY'S LEGS, OKAY--
513
00:17:58,378 --> 00:17:59,544
- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
514
00:17:59,546 --> 00:18:01,379
THIS IS MY BROTHER-IN-LAW,
TERRY, OKAY?
515
00:18:01,381 --> 00:18:02,580
HE'S TAKING PARALEGAL CLASSES.
516
00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:04,082
I THOUGHT I'D BRING HIM
DOWN HERE
517
00:18:04,084 --> 00:18:05,450
TO SEE A REAL LAWYER'S OFFICE.
518
00:18:05,452 --> 00:18:09,554
SO IS THIS IT?
- YEAH, THIS IS IT.
519
00:18:09,556 --> 00:18:11,389
- BUT DO LET ME KNOW
WHEN YOU GET THE MONEY.
520
00:18:11,391 --> 00:18:12,557
- YEAH.
- OKAY?
521
00:18:12,559 --> 00:18:16,094
I DON'T WANT TO
BREAK YOUR LEGS.
522
00:18:16,096 --> 00:18:17,695
- [laughs]
- [chuckles nervously]
523
00:18:17,697 --> 00:18:19,564
COULD YOU IMAGINE?
- YEAH.
524
00:18:19,566 --> 00:18:21,566
- WHAT ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT?
BREAKING LEGS?
525
00:18:21,568 --> 00:18:24,802
- NICE TO MEET YOU.
526
00:18:24,804 --> 00:18:28,106
I WAS GONNA BUY MY MOM
A HOUSE.
527
00:18:28,108 --> 00:18:31,542
- YOU LITERALLY HAVE NO CONCEPT
OF HOW MUCH THINGS COST, DO YOU?
528
00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:33,744
[dance music]
529
00:18:33,746 --> 00:18:36,147
- LOOK, EDIE, I WANTED
TO TALK TO YOU--
530
00:18:36,149 --> 00:18:37,748
- BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING ELSE,
531
00:18:37,750 --> 00:18:40,284
YOU ARE GONNA TONGUE ME
SO HARD AFTER YOU TASTE THIS.
532
00:18:40,286 --> 00:18:41,719
- SO WHERE'D YOU PICK
THIS PLACE OUT?
533
00:18:41,721 --> 00:18:43,421
ON YELP'S TOP TEN ROOFIE BARS?
534
00:18:43,423 --> 00:18:44,789
- I JUST WANTED US
TO HAVE A GOOD TIME.
535
00:18:44,791 --> 00:18:46,891
YOU COVERED SO WELL TODAY.
536
00:18:46,893 --> 00:18:49,827
- EDIE, I CAN'T BE UNETHICAL.
I CAN'T.
537
00:18:49,829 --> 00:18:52,797
I CAN'T EVER COVER
LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN.
538
00:18:52,799 --> 00:18:54,632
THAT WAS A ONE-TIME THING,
RIGHT?
539
00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:56,801
- RIGHT. YEAH, GOTCHA.
- OKAY.
540
00:18:56,803 --> 00:18:58,769
- YEAH, NO MORE ONE-TIME THINGS.
- OKAY.
541
00:18:58,771 --> 00:19:00,771
- UNTIL YOU TELL ME THAT YOU
NEED ANOTHER ONE-TIME THING.
542
00:19:00,773 --> 00:19:03,407
AND THEN WE'LL TOTALLY
ONE-TIME THING IT UP.
543
00:19:03,409 --> 00:19:05,776
- HAVE THERE BEEN MORE THAN
ONE ONE-TIME THING?
544
00:19:05,778 --> 00:19:07,612
- HAVE I HELPED FRIENDS OUT?
SURE.
545
00:19:07,614 --> 00:19:08,846
BUT THAT'S WHAT FRIENDS DO.
546
00:19:08,848 --> 00:19:10,615
I SUPPORT THEM,
AND THEN THEY'RE LIKE,
547
00:19:10,617 --> 00:19:13,151
"THANKS, BESTIE,"
AND I'M LIKE, "THANK YOU."
548
00:19:13,153 --> 00:19:15,319
- OKAY.
549
00:19:15,321 --> 00:19:18,756
I'M GETTING THE SENSE,
AND CALL IT A FRIEND HUNCH,
550
00:19:18,758 --> 00:19:21,592
THAT MAYBE YOU--YOU DO THINGS,
LIKE BAD THINGS,
551
00:19:21,594 --> 00:19:23,928
FOR OTHER PEOPLE
SO THEY'LL LIKE YOU?
552
00:19:23,930 --> 00:19:25,830
- YOU TOO?
[gasps]
553
00:19:25,832 --> 00:19:27,832
SAMESIES.
- NO, NO, NO, NO.
554
00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:28,866
NO. NO, NO, NO.
- SAMESIES!
555
00:19:28,868 --> 00:19:30,801
- WE ARE NOT SAMESIES.
556
00:19:30,803 --> 00:19:32,537
I CALL YOU MY BESTIE,
AND YOU'RE READY
557
00:19:32,539 --> 00:19:34,939
TO BREAK THE LAW FOR ME?
558
00:19:34,941 --> 00:19:38,342
THERE'S REALLY ONLY ONE THING
THAT YOU CAN DO.
559
00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:40,211
YOU GOT TO TURN YOURSELF IN.
- TAKE IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL.
560
00:19:46,418 --> 00:19:48,819
- TUESDAYS, HUH?
- YEAH.
561
00:19:48,821 --> 00:19:52,456
- TUESDAYS, THEY'RE LIKE
THE MONDAYS OF TUESDAYS.
562
00:19:52,458 --> 00:19:54,959
NOTHING? WHAT?
NO OFFICE BANTER?
563
00:19:54,961 --> 00:19:56,961
- I CAN'T, PHIL.
I GOT A REAL PROBLEM HERE, OKAY?
564
00:19:56,963 --> 00:19:58,729
I GOT TO SEND
MY BEST FRIEND TO JAIL,
565
00:19:58,731 --> 00:20:00,965
AND IT MAKES ME WANT TO, LIKE,
HURL ON THAT WALL.
566
00:20:00,967 --> 00:20:02,733
- WAIT.
EDIE'S YOUR BEST FRIEND?
567
00:20:02,735 --> 00:20:03,968
YOU'VE KNOWN HER,
LIKE A MINUTE.
568
00:20:03,970 --> 00:20:05,970
- YEAH, WELL,
SHE WAS REALLY NICE TO ME.
569
00:20:05,972 --> 00:20:07,972
AND WE CONNECTED RIGHT AWAY--
570
00:20:07,974 --> 00:20:09,540
HOW'D YOU KNOW IT WAS EDIE?
571
00:20:09,542 --> 00:20:11,709
- WELL, YESTERDAY, YOU MENTIONED
HELPING OUT A FRIEND.
572
00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:13,511
YOU DON'T HAVE MANY OF THOSE,
AND REALLY,
573
00:20:13,513 --> 00:20:14,879
ONLY ONE OF THEM
COULD FUDGE EVIDENCE.
574
00:20:14,881 --> 00:20:17,848
THIS IS SUB-SCOOBY-DOO
LEVEL STUFF HERE.
575
00:20:17,850 --> 00:20:19,750
HEY, FELLAS, THANKS.
- NINA, HEY.
576
00:20:19,752 --> 00:20:21,719
YOUR CLOWN FRIEND SCREWED US.
577
00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:23,821
YEAH, HE TURNED ME IN.
DON'T TRUST HIM.
578
00:20:23,823 --> 00:20:26,257
- TURNS OUT SHE LOVES TO FUDGE.
- OH, MY GOD, HOW MUCH?
579
00:20:26,259 --> 00:20:28,259
- 89 FUDGES THIS YEAR.
- OH, MY GOD.
580
00:20:28,261 --> 00:20:29,994
SHE'S A ONE-WOMAN
FUDGE FACTORY.
581
00:20:29,996 --> 00:20:32,663
- OH, YOU LOOK AMAZING
IN THAT DRESS.
582
00:20:32,665 --> 00:20:34,699
- OH.
583
00:20:34,701 --> 00:20:36,867
I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU DID THIS FOR ME.
584
00:20:36,869 --> 00:20:39,003
- WELL, I KIND OF DID IT FOR
THE POTENTIALLY INNOCENT PEOPLE
585
00:20:39,005 --> 00:20:40,838
THAT SHE MIGHT HAVE
SENT TO JAIL, BUT--
586
00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:43,674
- MAYBE YOU DO GET ME.
- MM.
587
00:20:43,676 --> 00:20:45,376
- WHAT DOES IT SAY
ABOUT ME, THOUGH,
588
00:20:45,378 --> 00:20:47,712
THAT THE ONLY OTHER PERSON
WHO GETS ME IS BAT-SH-- CRAZY?
589
00:20:47,714 --> 00:20:48,846
- THAT YOU'RE BAT-SH-- CRAZY.
590
00:20:48,848 --> 00:20:50,414
- THAT WAS
A RHETORICAL QUESTION.
591
00:20:50,416 --> 00:20:52,250
WHAT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO--
WHATEVER.
592
00:20:52,252 --> 00:20:53,918
SAY WHATEVER YOU WANT.
- NICE BELT.
593
00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:55,853
CONGRATS ON WINNING
THE UFC CHAMPIONSHIP.
594
00:20:55,855 --> 00:20:57,288
- THERE IT IS.
595
00:21:01,226 --> 00:21:04,562
- WELL, LOOKS LIKE
I WAS WRONG ABOUT YOU, NINA.
596
00:21:04,564 --> 00:21:07,632
I THOUGHT YOU WERE SELFISH
AND TERRIBLE.
597
00:21:07,634 --> 00:21:10,968
THAT CROOKED FORENSICS EXPERT
TO JUSTICE?
598
00:21:10,970 --> 00:21:13,271
- YEAH.
YEAH, I GUESS IT WAS, ACTUALLY.
599
00:21:13,273 --> 00:21:15,640
SO I'M KIND OF THE OFFICE HERO.
600
00:21:15,642 --> 00:21:17,308
I MEAN, EVERY OFFICE HAS ONE,
SO...
601
00:21:17,310 --> 00:21:19,877
- YEAH.
LISTEN UP, EVERYBODY.
602
00:21:19,879 --> 00:21:22,546
BECAUSE OF NINA'S AMAZING WORK,
603
00:21:22,548 --> 00:21:24,882
HERE ARE ALL THE CASES
YOU HAVE TO RETRY.
604
00:21:24,884 --> 00:21:26,984
- AW, MAN!
- YOU KNOW WHAT?
605
00:21:26,986 --> 00:21:28,286
TECHNICALLY IT WAS PHIL
606
00:21:28,288 --> 00:21:29,387
THAT TURNED HER IN, SO...
607
00:21:29,389 --> 00:21:31,622
- [chanting]
NINA SUCKS.
608
00:21:31,624 --> 00:21:33,357
[both chanting]
NINA SUCKS.
609
00:21:33,359 --> 00:21:34,992
- HOW IS EIGHTH GRADE?
- NINA SUCKS. IN THE BACK.
610
00:21:34,994 --> 00:21:35,960
[all chanting]
NINA SUCKS.
611
00:21:35,962 --> 00:21:37,295
- OH, MY GOD.
612
00:21:37,297 --> 00:21:38,729
[all chanting]
NINA SUCKS.
613
00:21:38,731 --> 00:21:41,932
NINA SUCKS.
NINA SUCKS.
614
00:21:41,934 --> 00:21:43,934
NINA SUCKS.
615
00:21:43,936 --> 00:21:46,704
NINA SUCKS.
NINA SUCKS.
45006
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