All language subtitles for Drop Dead Diva (2009) - S01E07 - The Magic Bullet (1080p AMZN WEB-DL x265 Celdra)_track3_[eng]

See that aspiring model there?

That was me, Deb,
until the day I died.

I thought I'd go
straight to heaven,

but there was a bit
of a mix-up and I woke up

in someone else's body.

So now I'm Jane,

a super-busy lawyer
with my very own assistant.

I got a new life,
a new wardrobe,

and the only people who really
know what's going on with me

are my girlfriend Stacy
and my guardian angel, Fred.

I used to think everything
happened for a reason--

Whoo! Ha-ha.

-and, well,
I sure hope I was right.

♪ La, la, la, la-la-la-la

♪ La, la-la, la

♪ Don't ask me how I'm doin'
If you don't wanna know ♪

♪ I stayed up too late
Woke up late ♪

♪ Oh, you know how it goes

♪ Give off the vibe
That everything's fine ♪

♪ As long as you, long as you
Don't look in my eyes ♪

♪ It's all going
Just so perfectly wrong ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey
What can I say? ♪

♪ It's just one of those
One of those days ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey
What can I say? ♪

♪ It's just one of those...

Somebody's shooting!

What are you doing?

Vacuuming.

But you don't vacuum or dust

or unload the dishwasher.

Well, who paid all
the rent last month?

Never mind.

I have been up
for an hour.

I want details
about last night.

Tell me everything!

Stacy, what happened
on your date with Fred?

What are you
talking about?

I saw you kiss him.

I saw you leave with him.

And I was up
very, very late,

and I did not hear
you come home.

Details. Spill them.

Who's Fred?

Oh, no.

Stacy, please
don't do this again.

What am I doing?

If last night
didn't go well,

then you can't just pretend
he doesn't exist

like you did
with Tim and Marco.

I didn't act like
they didn't exist.

I just stopped
calling them back

or referring to them
by name.

Look, Fred's...different
from those guys.

And I work with him.

And if you break
his little heart,

I'm gonna have
to pick up the pieces.

I haven't broken
anyone's heart.

Are you okay?
Fine.

If you don't want
to tell me about Fred,

then I'm not going to tell you
about my dinner with Grayson.

You had dinner
with Grayson?!

Aah!
Shut up!

Okay, he came over
right after you left.

Crazy.

And it was just like
old times.

Mm. Except without
the touching nor the kissing
nor the sex.

Mm-hm.

True.

But he talked
all about Deb.

And then right around dessert,
I told him.

You did not!

No. I really wanted to,
though.

Ah, dinner with Grayson.

See, that you could have
gotten me out of bed for.

You could have pounded
on my door

and dragged me out of bed
for that.

Oh, no!

I have a motor-oil-commercial
audition,

and I still have to find
the perfect bikini.

Ugh. You can use a bikini
to sell anything.

I know.
Yay, America, right?

Tonight, I want every detail
about your dinner
a la Grayson.

As long as you tell me
about Fred. Quid pro quo.

That's lawyer for you tell me
about your dinner,

I'll tell you about mine.
Stacy.

Have you seen Fred?

Who?

Working bankers' hours, Jane?

Bitch said what?
What?

I didn't say anything.

Black over black.
Nice.

Are we attending
a ritual sacrifice?

Only if it's yours.

Staff meeting. You are
planning on joining us?

Ugh.
She makes me cranky.

I hate those meetings.

Everyone talking.
It's like, "Blah, blah.

"I'm a lawyer,
and I'm a lawyer.

And blah, blah lawyer."

Uh, well, you're gonna
be late for the blah-blah.

You have a new client
in your office.

She showed up this morning and
told Parker she wanted you.

Oh.

I read about your success
with the Lucy Tyner case,

the waitress who was fired
for being plus-sized.

Mm.

Oh, did the same thing
happen to you?

Me? No.

No, this is about
my daughter Hannah.

She's been on this diet,
"The Jillian Ford
EZ Thin Plan."

Oh, yeah,
I've seen the ads.

"Get thin and stay thin."

Well, if it doesn't work, um--

Ooh, we could sue
for false advertising.

No, actually, it does work.

It works too well.

I don't understand.

Hannah was miserable
in school.

She hated how she looked.

And so she read about
this diet on the internet,

Jillian Ford.

She begged me to get her
the 12-month plan.

So she lost weight fast...

too fast.

Well, if you want her
to stop losing weight,

um, my advice is pie.

Bake her a pie.
Everybody loves pie.

Ms. Bingum,
a couple weeks ago,

hannah felt light-headed.

And last Wednesday,
she fainted in class.

She was in the hospital
overnight.

And now the doctor's saying

that there's something
wrong with her heart.

She has arrhythmia.

She didn't have that
before this diet.

Oh.

I'm -- I'm sorry.

I mean, I can't force
her to eat, right?

I mean, to Hannah,
I'm already the wicked witch,

and Jillian Ford
is some fairy godmother.

Before I cut off
the Internet,

she was getting daily
supportive e-mails
from Jillian, you know,

"Way to go. Keep it off."

You know,
all part of the service.

Well, if this diet is as
dangerous as you say it is,

there should be warnings.

Yeah, well,
there aren't.

Okay, onto
a little housekeeping.

People, we're living
in tough economic times.

Let's watch those
expense reports.

Not every client
needs to eat at Mozza.

Excuse me. Meeting.
I'm looking for Kim Kaswell.

Oh, right here.
If that's from Prada,

you can just have my assistant
put it in my office.

Ms. Kaswell,

you've been served.

Is this a joke?

For a moment there,
I thought he was gonna strip.

My former assistant Adam
is suing me...

...for sexual harassment.

The firm too.

Okay. This just became
a very different meeting.

Sorry I'm late.

Oh, Kim,
did that UPS guy find you?

What'd I miss?

Go away.

Okay, what is the point
of knocking

if you're just gonna
barge right in?

Hannah, don't be rude.

This is Ms. Bingum.

She is the lawyer who's going
to help us with our case.

Put the phone away.

You're going to talk to her.

that's a really cool phone.

Did you bedazzle it yourself?

So why did my mom pick you,
to make a point?

What point?

You know, that big
is beautiful or something
like that?

That's harsh.

Am I making fun
of your Zac Efron posters?

I'm sorry.
That was mean.

I just don't feel
that great.

You hungry?
Duh.

My mom stole
all of my EZ thin bars.

And that was after she blocked
the website from our computer,

as if I don't have any friends
that have Internet.

Well, it looks like you have
got lunch sitting right there.

I already had my 500
calories for the day.

500 calories?

Yikes. That's like
four crackers and a raisin.

You sound like my mom.

Look, Jillian is
the real deal.

You know,
she was heavier than me--

well, the old me.

And she took charge
of her life, and that's
what I'm doing.

Hm.

You see that dress
over there?

Oh, cute.

I know. It's perfect.

I bought it when
I was six sizes bigger,

and now I'm wearing
it to a dance.

I totally get it.

Here's the problem:
you keep this up,

they're gonna have to hold
that dance in the hospital.

You don't know
what you're talking about.

Hannah, you're
starving yourself.

Your mother hired me
to sue Jillian Ford,

and if this goes to court,
I'd want you to testify.

Absolutely.

You know what I'll say?

Before I went on
the Jillian diet,

nobody ever talked to me.

And then I dropped 40 pounds,
and I got friends.

I can shop at Forever 21
and guys like me.

My whole life changed.

What about
your heart arrhythmia?

I'm fine.

Your mother
doesn't think so.

Listen, my mom is happy...

being the way she is.

I wasn't,

and I did something
about it.

"During the firm
Christmas Party,

"Ms. Kaswell cornered
Adam Bay in her office

"and forced him to watch
as she ate chocolate cake

in a heightened
and lascivious sexual manner."

It does not say that.

I couldn't make that up.
The guy sounds crazy.

He's just out
to humiliate you.

Yeah, well,
mission accomplished.

"Ms. Kaswell then locked
her office door

"and tried to kiss Adam Bay.

Adam Bay resisted and was
fired the next day."

The only thing he got right
is that I fired him.

The kid was inept. He couldn't
work an electric stapler.

Noted.

This is a nuisance suit.

Disgruntled employee gets
the ax and tries to get even.

That's right.
We settle with him,

we'll just encourage
more of these.

I agree. That said,
his attorney sent this over.

What is it?

Allegedly,
Adam captured your encounter

on his cellphone video.

What?
You mind?

Whatever.

Oh, look at you.

Mm. I've been waiting
for this all night.

Come to mama.

Mm.

Mm.

Okay, so this isn't...

great.

Oh, God,
you're so beautiful.

Seriously?
It's cake.

Look, I work really hard
to stay fit

and when I do indulge
in a piece of chocolate cake

every now and then,
I enjoy it.

Sue me.
That's what he's doing.

I'm gonna call
adam's attorney

and schedule
a settlement conference.

I'd like you both there.
There will be coffee.

No cake.

Ooh! You look Fergalicious!

I haven't been in a bikini
in a week.

Oh, I have to lose, like,
three major pounds.

Please don't
make me kill you.

I'm still waiting for the rest
of the Grayson story.

There's not much more
to tell.

I chickened out
and didn't tell him I was Deb.

But I really wanted to.

So invite him
to another dinner,

open a couple bottles of wine,
and spill.

I can't.
Why not?

Because of Fred.

I promised him
I wouldn't tell.

Okay, I don't want
to hear any more

about this make-believe
Fred person.

Sweetie, did you sign up
for the Jillian Ford diet?

Let's do it together!

No. I didn't.
I'm suing Ms. Ford.

What? Why?

Models swear by her diet.

Kecia Long-- She does
all those lingerie spreads.

-she goes on Jillian Ford
every year after the holidays

and loses, like,
20 pounds in 2 weeks.

Wait, isn't Kecia the one
who tried to get us

to eat nothing but maple syrup
for a month?
Mm-hm.

What happened to her?

Um, I think
her colon exploded.

Mm-hm.

Jillian's diet is making my
client's daughter really sick.

I had these EZ thin bars
analyzed by a lab.

Ooh. Look at you all CSI.

You know what's in them?
Uh-uh.

Caffeine, guarine,
and ephedrine.

Is that last one
from Dreamgirls?

That's basically
speed disguised
as nutritional supplements.

Yeah.

But does it work?

No, no, no, no.

We do not eat the evidence.

Good luck!

"Jane, turns out
I broke, like, 62 rules
when I kissed Stacy,

"and I've been transferred
back to the home office.

"I'd ask you to tell her
it was worth it,

"but she won't know
what you're talking about.

"When I left, all memories
of me were erased
except yours.

"Rules are rules.

"Take care of yourself, Jane.

"I'm still looking out
for you, just from higher up.

Best, Fred."

We're asking for an injunction
shutting down the program

and a settlement large enough
to send a message.

Great.
Yeah.

Oh, my God!
That's her!

Hannah!

Hi! I'm Hannah Porter.

Hello.
You're the girl who's--

Oh, it was my mom's idea.
I think you're awesome.

Oh. Thank you, darling.

Wow. Very cold hands.

Nice to meet you.
Stay away from my daughter.

Mom!
Excuse me.

It doesn't seem like your
client is terribly invested.

Perhaps we could settle
this lawsuit for, uh,

an autographed photo.

My client is 15,

and she doesn't need
role models

teaching her
how to starve herself.

Counsel, you know better than
to directly engage my client.

I approached her. I did.

Listen, bringing this to trial

will cost a lot of time
and money.

Ms. Ford, we're more than
happy to avoid court,

as soon as you bring your
products up to FDA standards

and post warning labels.

Heh. Are you kidding?

Ms. Bingum,
I use these products myself,

and I am, by far,
the healthiest person
in this conversation.

Besides, who would
buy a diet program

with warning labels?

Well, say hello to the point.

We will see you in court.

Can't wait.

What?

Nothing.
I didn't say anything.

You were about to.

You're right.

I wanted to say
that we're all behind you.

Don't worry.

It's gonna be
a piece of cake.

Adam Bay
is in the conference room.

If you'd rather
stay out here--
No, no, no, no.

I want to see that little
cockroach face-to-face.

Okay.

Just try not to strangle
him 'cause there
will be witnesses.

No promises.

Let Parker do the talking.
This will all be over soon.

Fine. I won't say a word.

$200,000?
Are you out of your mind?!

It does seem a little high.

Yeah, and so do they.

You're right.
She does have temper.

She can't control herself.
That's why I'm here.

You son of a bitch.
Kim.

Adam was traumatized
by his experience

and has been unable to find
work in the legal profession.

Seems to me your client
is lying his ass off,

which makes him perfect
for the legal profession.

Kim, let's try
and keep this constructive.

You have our number.

24 hours or we go to a jury.

Adam.

Ugh!

She'll take a lot less.

I didn't do anything.

I understand that,
but a jury might not.

And if you lose at trial,
I can't keep you at the firm.

Your reputation
becomes a liability,

and my insurance company
won't allow it.

I don't care.
Let's go to trial.
I'll represent myself.

You don't have to do that.

I'll represent Kim.

Employment law
was my focus at Pearson.

Parker, please.

We can beat this.

Okay.

But know that her career
with us

is effectively over
if you don't.

Hey, I meant to thank you for
that dinner the other night.

Oh. Of course.
It's my pleasure.

English muffin?

Um, sure.

So we should have dinner
again sometime.

Yeah,
I was thinking the same thing.

Uh, how about tonight?

Oh, I can't.

Oh, yeah, me neither.
But you just said--

No, I just meant
metaphorically.

You're busy?

Drowning.
Kim's harassment case.

How'd you get roped
into that?

I offered.

Everyone needs someone
in their corner.

It's why we went
to law school, right?

Absolutely.
All four years.

Three years.

Right. Yeah.
No, I know.

It's just that the first year
seems like two.

Um, Kim's really lucky
to have you.

So, after the case,
we should grab that dinner.

Great.
I'll make pumpkin ravioli.

I love pumpkin ravioli.

I can't wait.

I got your file from HR.

That's pretty thick.

It looks like you've
been through quite
a few assistants.

I'm picky.

Some of those assistants
only lasted a couple of weeks.

One guy quit after lunch,
day one.
So?

Look, I'm not judging.
I'm asking.

Are you asking
if my assistants keep leaving

because I sexually
harass them?

Kim, you know harassment
suits get ugly.

We need to be prepared
for anything.

You're right.
Let's keep going.

We still need
character witnesses.

I'm working on it.

Are you in touch with
any old assistants?

Would I be in touch
with people I fire?

Kim.
Look.

If you're gonna defend me,
you need to know a few things.

I'm not warm.
I'm not fuzzy.

I don't remember
children's names or birthdays

or if your parents
are visiting.

I do my job.

If you want
a character witness,

go talk to the guy who owns
the deli on the first floor.

I buy my coffee
from him every day,

and he finds me
perfectly delightful.

I have to get back
to work.

Excuse me.

Hannah fainted
in Spanish class,

and the school
called me in.

And I raced her
to the doctor.

And he said she was fainting
because of her diet.

The Jillian Ford diet.

Jillian Ford
instructs her clients

to eat no more
than 500 calories a day.

Doctors have a name
for this diet.

They call it starvation.

Objection. The witness
is not a medical expert.

The witness
isn't a moron either.

Hey, guess what?

You don't have to go
to medical school

to know that if you
don't eat, you starve.

Sustained.
Jury will disregard.

What about the supplements
that Jillian Ford sells?

According to Hannah's doctor,
they're not supplements
at all.

There's no fatty acids,
no fibers.

The doctor believes
that these pills

contributed to her arrhythmia.

She may not have liked
how she looked before,

but she was healthy.

Thank you, Claire.

A teenager
can be a lot of work.

Yes, they can.

And parents don't
always have control

over everything
their children do.

No, they don't.

Hannah lost a lot of weight
very quickly.

Is it possible that
she ignored instructions,

ate too little, and overdosed
on the supplements?

It's possible.

Without you knowing?

Well, I don't know what she's
doing every second of the day.

I see.

If-- If Hannah was
flunking out of school

because she watched
too much TV,

would you sue the network?

Of course not.

You'd act like a parent
and turn off the television.

And you're a good mother.
I believe so.

Who paid for the Jillian Ford
diet plan for Hannah?

I did.

LAWYER:Really?

You pulled out
your credit card

and bought Hannah something
you believe damaged her heart.

No, it's not like that.
She was very unhappy.

It seems to me that either
you're not such a good mother,

or you're wrong about
the Jillian Ford diet.

Which is it?
Objection! Disrespectful.

You know, maybe your mother
didn't do such a good job.

Withdrawn.

No more questions.

Teri...

you've been an assistant
for a while, right?

Dude, are we really
gonna have

a "what color is your
parachute?" moment?

Everyone's got their own path.

No, what I mean is,

you must have a lot of friends
in the whole...

assistant-paralegal network.

Well, I don't want to brag,

but my twitter feed
is through the roof.

Do you think maybe you could
track down someone

who worked for Kim and has
something positive to say?

Why would I do that?

Listen, I know you're not
best friends with her,

but do you really think
Kim harassed Adam?

No.

Tormented, maybe.
Harassed?

She's too smart for that.

This lawsuit's
a career killer.

She may not show it,
but Kim's terrified.

I guess I could
make some calls,

maybe hit a couple
happy hours after work.

There is no one chattier
than a drunk assistant.

Thank you.

Oh, I'm gonna need some money
for expenses.

Okay if I bill your client?

Adam Bay vs. Kim Kaswell

and Harrison & Parker, LLP.

I'm ready to hear witnesses.

I don't think I'll be able
to forget the incident.

It wasn't an "incident."

It was an office
christmas party.

There was an open bar,

and I was having
a great time.

I was swamped with
end-of-the-year paperwork,

but I decided to take a break,

make an appearance,
and grab a slice of cake.

Ms. Kaswell invited me
back to her office.

I figured she just wanted
me to do some work.

But then she shut the door.

He followed me back
to my office.

I never shut the door.

But I couldn't say no.
She's a senior associate.

I didn't think anyone
would believe me.

That's when I took out
my cellphone and hit record,

What kind of person
records their boss?

He's the one who should
be on trial, not me.

I can't get a job.
I can't sleep.

My doctor said I have
post-traumatic stress.

The only thing being
stressed is the truth.

He was an incompetent
employee.

As a liar, not so bad.

Ms. Kaswell,
isn't it true

that you worked
as a professor's assistant

during your final year
of law school?

I did.

And was Robert Burns
one of your students?

Objection. This name
never came up in discovery.

Your honor, we obtained this
information just prior
to court.

It better be relevant.

It is.

Was Robert Burns
your student?

I suppose.

You suppose.

I-I think you'd remember
the name of a student

who sued you
for sexual harassment.

Objection!

Did you sleep with
your student? Your honor!

Sustained.
Shut it down, counsel.

Jury will disregard.

Hey, is it okay
if I leave early tonight?

Grayson asked me
to find someone

with something nice
to say about Kim,

and it is a long drive
to hell.

That case isn't over yet?

What's the rush?

I thought you'd want
Kim's humiliation

to be long and drawn out.

Or maybe that's just me.

I need Grayson to focus
on something else.

Like?

Nothing. Never mind.

Oh, the defense just faxed
over a new witness list

for the Jillian Ford ca--

Oh, you are gonna
want to see this.

He can't call me!
I'm plaintiff's counsel!

Ms. Bingum has information
relevant to our defense,

and she is on our witness
list. I just got that
10 minutes ago.

Ten minutes is still notice.

This is highly irregular,
Mr. Hunter.

I acknowledge that,
your honor.

If you believe we
wasted the court's time,

hold me in contempt.

Don't think I won't.

But for now, I'm curious.

You have your witness
and a very short leash.

Your honor,
you're not really going to--

Ms. Bingum,
consider yourself sworn in.

You've been on a number
of different diets,
haven't you?

Objection.
None of his business.

Overruled.
Answer the question.

Probably.

Have you ever used my client's
weight-loss system?

That's a stupid question.
Of course not.

So before this trial began,
you weren't a big fan

of the Jillian Ford
EZ thin diet plan?

Two words.

"No" and "way."

Care to explain this?

I've tried other diets,
nothing worked,

but after 10 days of being on
the Jillian Ford EZ thin plan,

I've lost 15 pounds!

All I can say is,
thank you, Jillian Ford.

I took it off, and
I can't wait to keep it off!

I mean, how could you not tell
me that you were on her diet?

Okay, this is exactly
what they want,

to sway your confidence in me.
Well, it worked.

Claire,
like I told the judge,

I honestly don't remember
being on that diet.

I've been on so many, I guess.

I don't know!

You believe me, right?

I don't have much choice.

I have to get back to Hannah.

She's not feeling well,

and she is furious
at me for all this.

I cannot believe
that Jillian Ford

has more credibility
with my daughter than I do.

We're going to fix that.

Why didn't you tell me
I was on her diet?

Whoa.
Now it's my fault?

I can't keep up
with your diet of the month.

You're right.

I wonder why I didn't
stick with EZ thin.

Do you think
it made me sick?

Maybe you should ask
your doctor.

Ooh, good idea.

Wait.
What?

Who's my doctor?

So how's the gym working out?

The gym?

At your last physical,

you promised me 30 minutes
of cardio three times a week.

Oh. It's fine.

Listen, I wanted to talk
to you about
the Jillian Ford diet.

Please tell me
you are not thinking
about doing that again.

Well, it kind of worked
the first time, didn't it?

Selective memory, huh?

Tell yourself
whatever you want.

It worked...

for three weeks, Jane,
and then it didn't.

Because I didn't have
the discipline.

Why do you always
do that to yourself?

Do what?

It had nothing to do
with willpower.

Your body could only
starve itself for three weeks.

But hundreds of people

posted their success stories
on her website.

Oh. Yes. And have you seen
many of them lately?

Because my guess would
be that their success

was as short-lived as yours.

This is like when
you came to me

with the idea
about gastric bypass.

I was gonna have
weight-loss surgery?

I wouldn't even
give you a brochure.

Well, everything looks good.

Your blood pressure's
a little high.

You, uh,
anxious about something?

No.

Well, a little.

It's-- There's something
going on at work.

Something or, um, someone?

You're a good doctor.

It's someone I've been
meaning to tell something to.

Well, my advice,
as a medical professional,

is, um, the sooner you do it,
the sooner you'll feel better.

Thanks.

See you next time, Jane.

Here you go. Two pitchers
of the imported stuff.

Keep the tab open.
I'll be back.

Hey, guys. Any room at
the Bishop & Mackenzie table?

Drinks are on me.

What's the occasion?

Kim Kaswell's
harassment trial.

We've been drinking
to that all night.

So here's a question:

Anyone interested
in testifying on her behalf?

Do you know if the guys
from Melveny are here?

I should have told you
about Robert Burns.

How am I supposed
to defend you

when you keep bombshells
like that from me?

I didn't think it was--
Relevant?

You mean you were hoping
it wouldn't come up.

I didn't do anything wrong.

The kid didn't like
the C I gave him

and decided to get back
at me by filing a complaint.

The school cleared me.

They just settled with him
anyway to avoid the publicity.

God, why does this
keep happening to me?

What?

Nothing.
No, I want to hear this.

I've seen you
use a pout or a smile
to get what you want.

Yeah, it's normal
human behavior.

I'm not making
excuses for who I am.

You're perceived
a certain way.

People will take
advantage of that.

Do you believe me about Adam
and Robert Burns?

I do.

But I'm not the jury.

Here's what's gonna happen.

In a few minutes,
your phone will ring.

Parker will ask you to come up
to his office by yourself.

He'll demand that you
settle the case.

Please don't.

Otherwise, I might as well
just admit that I'm guilty.

And I'm not.

Rough night?
You could say.

I've never had less fun
getting drunk

on someone else's credit card.

Maybe I can help.

Are you trying to flirt
with me?

You want me to?

Answering a question
with a question.

You sound like a lawyer.

I am.

Well, I was, briefly,

until I figured out how much
I hate swimming
with the sharks.

So I bailed,
got a job managing this place.

You ever work
with Kim Kaswell?

No.

Yeah. That'd be too easy.

But I did work with Adam Bay.

You have been eavesdropping.

You're not exactly
subtle or quiet.

It's guys like Adam
that are the reason
why I'm tending bar.

That entire lawsuit is so B.S.

Really?

Care to say that in court?

I'm kind of a
behind-the-scenes kind of guy.

You know what?
Let me call you a cab.

I'll tell you a good story
while we wait.

Internet backgammon?

How'd you know?

Lucky guess.

What are you still
doing here?

Ugh. I have hours
of phone calls to make

looking for unhappy dieters.

Are there any other kind?

Good point.

I heard you had
a rocky day in court.

Got rockier when we got back.

Parker called me upstairs,
Told me we had to settle,

but I don't think
I can do that to Kim.

If we settle,
it kills her career.

And if you don't,
Parker thinks
you're being insubordinate.

Yeah.

Any other client,
there'd be no question.

I'd do what he says.

But this is Kim.
It's different.

Because she's a colleague
and we work with her?

That's part of it.

There's something else?

Ever since Deb died,
I feel like...

I don't know,
like she's not really gone.

And I keep...

looking for her
in other women.

And every now and then...

I see something in Kim.

Wait. Before you say
anything else,

I have something to tell you.

What? You don't have
to look anymore.

Deb's here.

I'm Deb.

No, I was on my way to
The Price is Rightaudition,

and that's when I got hit
by the truck.

And up in heaven,
I pressed this button,

and they sent me back
in this body.

and I know it sounds crazy,
but it's true.

Grayson, don't you
remember that morning?

Remember?
You complimented my knees.

And you found
my nail polish, and you--

You kissed me goodbye.

Deb?

Yes.

What?

What?

You wanted
to tell me something.

Yeah.

Knock, knock.

It took me three happy hours
and two last calls,

Mr. Kent, sir,

but I am now suitably happy
and soon you will be too.

Your client is gonna want
to buy me an insanely
expensive gift.

I'm gonna e-mail her
a list of suggestions.

Okay.

I don't believe it.

I guess I'll go check on Teri.

All I can say is,
thank you, Jillian Ford.

I took it off, and
I can't wait to keep it off!

What's wrong?

The motor-oil commercial.

You didn't get it?

Oh, no, I got it,

but then the advertising guy

told me I had to lose
five pounds by Tuesday.

I told him I would
if he would.

And then I didn't get it.

Well, good for you.

I hope your week
is going better than mine.

I don't know.

I spent all night interviewing
former Jillian Ford clients.

And I read all
the testimonials online,

people who tried her diet
a year ago or two years ago.

Guess how many were able
to keep the weight off.

Two.

But your client Hannah did.

Yeah, and it put her
in the hospital.

What about Jillian Ford?

She's the other one.

But I think she's a liar.

You mean maybe
she was never fat?

No. Look,
there's all these pictures.

Wow.

She lost 110 pounds?

She lost Jessica Alba
in six months.

I think she's lying
about how she lost it

and how she kept it off.

I went to my
doctor yesterday--
Well, Jane's doctor.

-and apparently I asked
about gastric-bypass surgery.

Really?

Don't get any ideas.

I'd have to gain a
Jessica Alba to even qualify.

Do you think Jillian Ford
had gastric-bypass surgery?

It makes sense, doesn't it?

She has the surgery
to stay thin,

but tells the world
she lost the weight

through some crazy diet,

and then she sits back
and watches the money roll in,

because people are desperate
for a magic bullet.

Jane, you're a genius.

Well, not yet.

I still have to prove it.

I've noticed that you've
been wearing a shawl all week.

You a little chilly, Ms. Ford?
There's a draft.

It's 75 degrees in here.

And it's stuffy, isn't it?
Your Honor.

Move it along, Ms. Bingum.

What's this?

That is an EZ thin
supplement bar.

It is a critical staple
to my diet plan.

So your regimen calls for you,
or anyone on the diet,

to eat three of these a day,
is that right?

That is correct. Yes.

Well, it is about noon,

which means you are due
for your midday bar.

Would you do me a solid
and eat that?

Excuse me?

Oh, go ahead.
Take a big bite.

They're tasty.
I've tried them.

Your honor,
Ms. Ford is here to testify,
not to eat a snack.

The issue isn't that
she won't eat it,

the issue is that
she can't eat it.

Your Honor, counsel
is giving new meaning
to the word "stunt."

Oh, like putting me on the
stand didn't do that already.

Pot, meet kettle.

Overruled.
Proceed, Ms. Bingum.

Ms. Ford can you
or can you not

eat one of your own
EZ thin bars?

At the moment, I cannot.

Is that because
the second ingredient

listed on the package
is sucrose,

and your body
can't tolerate sucrose,

like anyone else who underwent
gastric-bypass surgery?

Objection!

Is that why you are wearing
a heavy shawl in a warm court?

A little cold-sensitive
since the surgery?

It's another common
side effect.

Are you not
going to do anything?

Not on your life.
I want to hear the answer.

Isn't it true that you had
gastric-bypass surgery,

and that's how you lost
all that weight?

It is not a crime.

No, it's not.

But your diet plan is.

And when you pawn it off

on susceptible young women
like Hannah Porter,

that's fraud.

Your Honor,
does counsel have a question?

Oh, I have a question.

What is the matter with you?

Well, I see you've come
to your senses.

Where do I sign?

All in good time, son.

Just a few things
to go over first.

Adam, this is from
your deposition.

Can you read
the highlighted part?

Yeah. Whatever.

As long as I get my check.

"She ate the cake
in a lascivious manner

and ordered me
to make out with her."

Those your exact words?

Yes. That's what I said.

Great.
Ooh, just a second.

Sorry. I gave you
the wrong deposition.

This is Roger O'Malley's
deposition.

Who is Roger O'Malley?
Parker, what's going on?

Honest mistake.

Those depositions
look awfully similar.

You know Roger, don't you?

No.

Really?
Roger O'Malley.

Sued his boss after
a cake-eating incident,

and the case quietly settled
for a lot of money.

Sound familiar?

Who was his lawyer?

Oh, yeah, the guy you
worked for before Kim.

You saw my associate here
eat a piece of cake

and thought, why not
take a shot yourself?

What's this?

Your case will be dismissed,

and we never want to see
your face again.

Sign it.

Need a pen, Adam?

Sign.

I understand the jury
has reached a verdict.

In the matter of Claire Porter
v. Jillian Ford enterprises,

we find for the plaintiff

and award actual damages
in the amount of $75,000

and punitive damages
in the amount of $100,000.

In addition,
I'm issuing an injunction

shutting down
the Jillian Ford website,

effective immediately.

We're adjourned.

You did it.
We did it.

Thank you.

Excuse me.

Mom.

Yeah?

I'm sorry.

Oh, Hannah.

I just wanted to look--

I know.

And Jillian
made it seem so easy.

I know. I just--
I don't want to lose you.

You want to go get some lunch?

Yeah.

Yeah, I'd like that.

And then we can go shopping
with all that money
that we just won.

Yeah.
No, that's for college.

Mom.
Hannah.

Good try.

Hey.

Hey.

You came back.

And you're not Fred.

Who's Fred?

He was the old mailroom guy.

I just started today.

Is there anything
I can help you with?

No. I just...

wanted to tell him that I won.

Congratulations.

Big win today.

Thanks.

And, uh, your doctor called.

She was just checking in.

She wanted to know if you
got that thing off your chest.

Is it something gross?

No, and I am going
to deal with it...

right now.

Okay.

Good night.

I did thank you, didn't I?

You did.

You also need to thank Teri.

I got it covered:

A suite at the Mirage

and front-row seats
to Thunder From Down Under.

Ooh.

But this is for you.

When I won my first case,
Parker gave it to me,

told me I couldn't open
it until I became partner.

Kim...

I can't accept this.

My career would be over
if it weren't for you.

Thanks for being
in my corner.

You're welcome.