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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,482 --> 00:00:08,878 So, I have what I've been told is a moral dilemma. 2 00:00:08,921 --> 00:00:12,186 Whatever your gut is telling you, do the opposite. 3 00:00:12,229 --> 00:00:14,579 That's what I thought at first, so I switched, 4 00:00:14,623 --> 00:00:17,017 but that made me think I should switch again. 5 00:00:17,060 --> 00:00:18,366 So now where am I? 6 00:00:18,409 --> 00:00:19,628 I'm going back to my phone. 7 00:00:19,671 --> 00:00:21,586 Give me a nudge when she gets to it. 8 00:00:21,630 --> 00:00:23,980 Patrick's getting married. 9 00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:25,851 And the phone is down. 10 00:00:25,895 --> 00:00:28,550 I feel like he and Christy just broke up. 11 00:00:28,593 --> 00:00:29,725 They did. 12 00:00:29,768 --> 00:00:31,248 Men are pigs. 13 00:00:31,292 --> 00:00:33,381 Unless he reconnected with a long-lost love. 14 00:00:33,424 --> 00:00:35,383 In that case, aw. 15 00:00:35,426 --> 00:00:37,211 It's the fitness model. 16 00:00:37,254 --> 00:00:39,387 He hid the ring in her "a-sigh" bowl. 17 00:00:39,430 --> 00:00:41,432 It thought it was "a-kye." 18 00:00:41,476 --> 00:00:43,260 You're both wrong. It's "ah-sigh-ee." 19 00:00:43,304 --> 00:00:45,436 Who cares how you say it? 20 00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:47,264 It's just sherbert. 21 00:00:47,308 --> 00:00:49,005 Actually, it's "sher-bit." 22 00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:51,268 Okay, good-bye. 23 00:00:51,312 --> 00:00:53,053 Stop. 24 00:00:53,096 --> 00:00:55,229 How's Christy taking it? 25 00:00:55,272 --> 00:00:56,665 She doesn't know. 26 00:00:56,708 --> 00:00:58,667 Welcome to the aforementioned dilemma. 27 00:00:58,710 --> 00:01:00,103 Why haven't you told her? 28 00:01:00,147 --> 00:01:02,671 Because Adam's taking me away for a romantic weekend 29 00:01:02,714 --> 00:01:04,412 at a spa resort in Reno. 30 00:01:04,455 --> 00:01:05,282 Ooh... Oh... Oh... 31 00:01:05,326 --> 00:01:08,024 In theory, "Oh..." 32 00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:09,982 But how can I enjoy making sweet love to Adam 33 00:01:10,026 --> 00:01:11,419 in our room with partial mountain view 34 00:01:11,462 --> 00:01:13,899 when I keep getting FaceTimed by a puffy-eyed Christy? 35 00:01:15,162 --> 00:01:16,337 Partial view? 36 00:01:16,380 --> 00:01:18,339 I thought he loved you. 37 00:01:18,382 --> 00:01:20,776 Go back to your phone. 38 00:01:20,819 --> 00:01:22,647 Bonnie, part of being a mother 39 00:01:22,691 --> 00:01:24,519 is putting your child before you. 40 00:01:24,562 --> 00:01:26,173 That child is 40 years old, 41 00:01:26,216 --> 00:01:29,045 and this child has never had a hot stone massage. 42 00:01:30,568 --> 00:01:32,048 Oh, Marjorie, it's just two days. 43 00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:33,702 Let her have some fun. 44 00:01:33,745 --> 00:01:36,139 She's looking at a lifetime of partial views. 45 00:01:36,183 --> 00:01:38,054 Exactly. I can just as easily 46 00:01:38,098 --> 00:01:40,012 crush my daughter's world on Monday. 47 00:01:40,056 --> 00:01:42,972 And maybe bring her a Reno snow globe to soften the blow. 48 00:01:43,015 --> 00:01:44,278 She hates those things. 49 00:01:44,321 --> 00:01:46,497 Not everyonedoes. 50 00:01:49,326 --> 00:01:50,980 [whispers]: Dilemma over. I think she knows. 51 00:01:51,023 --> 00:01:53,025 We can't be sure. It might be something I did. 52 00:01:53,069 --> 00:01:54,549 Oh, please be something I did. 53 00:01:55,680 --> 00:01:56,986 What's the matter, honey? 54 00:01:57,029 --> 00:01:58,988 Patrick's getting married. 55 00:01:59,031 --> 00:02:01,338 [sniffles] He posted on Instagram. 56 00:02:01,382 --> 00:02:04,472 He gave her a ring in an "ah-cha-chi" bowl. 57 00:02:04,515 --> 00:02:06,126 Actually... 58 00:02:06,169 --> 00:02:07,257 Let her have this. 59 00:02:10,260 --> 00:02:12,262 ♪ 60 00:02:28,887 --> 00:02:30,541 ♪ 61 00:02:34,241 --> 00:02:35,894 [blows] 62 00:02:38,723 --> 00:02:40,334 You want a hit? 63 00:02:40,377 --> 00:02:43,685 No. No, thanks. I already had a log of cookie dough for lunch. 64 00:02:45,252 --> 00:02:46,818 I just don't understand 65 00:02:46,862 --> 00:02:49,647 how Patrick can get over me so fast. 66 00:02:49,691 --> 00:02:52,259 I'm a catch. 67 00:02:52,302 --> 00:02:55,262 It's not you-- my brother just can't live alone. 68 00:02:55,305 --> 00:02:57,438 So what, he'll just marry anyone? 69 00:02:57,481 --> 00:02:59,788 What do the towels in his bathroom say? 70 00:02:59,831 --> 00:03:01,746 "His and Whoever"? 71 00:03:01,790 --> 00:03:05,272 Babe, you're just taking shorts and T-shirts to Reno, right? 72 00:03:05,315 --> 00:03:08,013 Yeah. It's gonna be hot.Oh. It's gonna be hot. 73 00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:10,538 Oh. Right. 74 00:03:10,581 --> 00:03:12,496 [whispers]: It's gonna be sohot. 75 00:03:13,845 --> 00:03:15,456 I can still hear you. 76 00:03:15,499 --> 00:03:17,327 Honey, are you gonna be okay this weekend? 77 00:03:17,371 --> 00:03:19,068 Why don't you make plans with the girls? 78 00:03:19,111 --> 00:03:21,070 Jill's busy, Wendy's working, 79 00:03:21,113 --> 00:03:23,246 and Marjorie and Victor are spending the weekend 80 00:03:23,290 --> 00:03:24,856 rediscovering their love. 81 00:03:24,900 --> 00:03:27,119 Oosh. Ugh. [shudders] 82 00:03:28,730 --> 00:03:31,211 [sighs] I need some chocolate syrup. 83 00:03:31,254 --> 00:03:33,604 This isn't sweet enough. 84 00:03:33,648 --> 00:03:35,302 I'm worried about her. 85 00:03:35,345 --> 00:03:37,565 Me, too. You think we should postpone this trip? 86 00:03:37,608 --> 00:03:40,089 No way. I can still worry about her while I'm on top of you 87 00:03:40,132 --> 00:03:41,743 looking at some mountain and some parking lot. 88 00:03:41,786 --> 00:03:44,311 You know, honey, we could go away together anytime. 89 00:03:44,354 --> 00:03:46,226 I would not take it personally 90 00:03:46,269 --> 00:03:47,879 if you went with her instead of me. 91 00:03:47,923 --> 00:03:50,317 [clicks tongue] You're so sweet. 92 00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:51,883 So what's the sporting event 93 00:03:51,927 --> 00:03:53,929 you don't want to miss this weekend? 94 00:03:53,972 --> 00:03:56,018 I'll admit, when I booked this trip, 95 00:03:56,061 --> 00:03:58,238 that I did not know Edmonton and Calgary 96 00:03:58,281 --> 00:04:00,065 would make it to a game seven. 97 00:04:00,109 --> 00:04:01,980 And let me guess-- those two teams 98 00:04:02,024 --> 00:04:03,678 don't like each other very much. 99 00:04:03,721 --> 00:04:05,854 Oh, it's gonna get a little chippy. 100 00:04:05,897 --> 00:04:07,899 But I really do think that you should take her 101 00:04:07,943 --> 00:04:09,292 and get her mind off Patrick. 102 00:04:09,336 --> 00:04:10,641 Trust me, she's gonna be okay. 103 00:04:10,685 --> 00:04:12,034 She's stronger than she looks, 104 00:04:12,077 --> 00:04:14,602 thanks to a lifetime of disappointment. 105 00:04:15,864 --> 00:04:17,692 We didn't have any chocolate syrup, 106 00:04:17,735 --> 00:04:21,217 so I just rolled it in sugar and Froot Loops. 107 00:04:22,392 --> 00:04:25,830 I might have invented something great. 108 00:04:25,874 --> 00:04:28,137 ♪ 109 00:04:30,095 --> 00:04:32,054 You are so lucky to have Adam. 110 00:04:32,097 --> 00:04:34,839 What a sweet guy to give up his trip for me. 111 00:04:34,883 --> 00:04:36,711 He shouldn't get the credit for this. 112 00:04:36,754 --> 00:04:38,365 This was my idea. 113 00:04:38,408 --> 00:04:40,671 He pushed back pretty hard, but I said, "No, 114 00:04:40,715 --> 00:04:43,065 my Christy needs this." 115 00:04:43,108 --> 00:04:46,286 I half believed you until you said "my Christy." 116 00:04:47,765 --> 00:04:49,680 Yeah, I got greedy. 117 00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:52,727 You know, it'd be a lot easier for you to forget Patrick 118 00:04:52,770 --> 00:04:54,729 if you got off his Instagram page. 119 00:04:54,772 --> 00:04:56,557 I'm not looking at him. 120 00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:58,776 I'm looking at the giant ring he gave her. 121 00:04:58,820 --> 00:05:00,909 How many karats do you think that is? 122 00:05:02,084 --> 00:05:03,694 Am I focusing on the massive one 123 00:05:03,738 --> 00:05:05,870 in the middle or the little ones worshipping it? 124 00:05:05,914 --> 00:05:07,481 Not helpful. 125 00:05:07,524 --> 00:05:10,005 All it tells me is someone's overcompensating. 126 00:05:10,048 --> 00:05:11,528 Actually, no. 127 00:05:11,572 --> 00:05:14,270 He was pretty good in that department. Really? 128 00:05:14,314 --> 00:05:17,578 He looks like a guy who'd have a wee dingle. 129 00:05:17,621 --> 00:05:19,580 A wee dingle? 130 00:05:19,623 --> 00:05:23,148 Yeah. Like a strawberry peeking up out of the leaves. 131 00:05:23,192 --> 00:05:24,889 You can tell by looking at a guy? 132 00:05:24,933 --> 00:05:27,936 Measure the distance between their eyes, multiply by three. 133 00:05:29,807 --> 00:05:32,375 This is what it would look like on me. 134 00:05:34,116 --> 00:05:36,031 Yeah, but if you took the ring, 135 00:05:36,074 --> 00:05:38,207 you'd have to take the guy that came with it, 136 00:05:38,250 --> 00:05:39,556 and you didn't want him. 137 00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:42,516 [sighs] You know what? You're right. 138 00:05:42,559 --> 00:05:43,778 I'm always right. 139 00:05:43,821 --> 00:05:47,695 Name one other time you were right, ever. 140 00:05:47,738 --> 00:05:49,697 Titanic. 141 00:05:49,740 --> 00:05:52,395 What, that you didn't go on it? 142 00:05:52,439 --> 00:05:54,005 The movie. 143 00:05:54,049 --> 00:05:56,051 Everyone said it was no good, 144 00:05:56,094 --> 00:05:58,662 and I said, "Give this little boat picture a try." 145 00:05:58,706 --> 00:06:00,403 What are you talking about? 146 00:06:00,447 --> 00:06:02,971 It's themost popular movie of all time. 147 00:06:03,014 --> 00:06:04,364 Thanks to me. 148 00:06:07,323 --> 00:06:12,284 ♪ Somewhere out there 149 00:06:12,328 --> 00:06:17,768 ♪ Beneath the pale moonlight 150 00:06:17,812 --> 00:06:19,335 ♪ Why 151 00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:21,119 ♪ Do, dah-dah, dee... 152 00:06:21,163 --> 00:06:22,556 What are you doing? 153 00:06:22,599 --> 00:06:24,471 I'm singing the Titanicsong. 154 00:06:24,514 --> 00:06:26,560 That's Fievel, the mouse from An American Tail. 155 00:06:26,603 --> 00:06:28,605 We'll rent it tonight. You'll see. 156 00:06:29,824 --> 00:06:31,826 Ooh! Ice cream. 157 00:06:31,869 --> 00:06:33,349 What? We're almost there. 158 00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:35,090 DQ! DQ! Exit, exit, exit! 159 00:06:35,133 --> 00:06:37,309 No! You can get ice cream at the hotel. 160 00:06:37,353 --> 00:06:39,442 We came here to make me feel better, 161 00:06:39,486 --> 00:06:41,749 and a chocolate Blizzard would make me feel better. 162 00:06:41,792 --> 00:06:43,272 [chanting]: DQ! DQ! 163 00:06:43,315 --> 00:06:44,926 DQ! DQ! DQ! 164 00:06:44,969 --> 00:06:47,145 DQ! DQ!This may be why I disappeared so much 165 00:06:47,189 --> 00:06:48,582 when you were a kid.DQ! DQ! 166 00:06:48,625 --> 00:06:51,672 DQ! DQ! DQ! DQ! 167 00:06:51,715 --> 00:06:58,461 ♪ Even though I know how very far apart we are ♪ 168 00:06:58,505 --> 00:07:01,595 ♪ It makes me happy to think 169 00:07:01,638 --> 00:07:06,469 ♪ We might be wishing on the same star... ♪ 170 00:07:06,513 --> 00:07:08,689 What is happening here? 171 00:07:08,732 --> 00:07:12,432 Love theme from Titanic. 172 00:07:13,824 --> 00:07:15,913 What can I do you for, Officer? 173 00:07:15,957 --> 00:07:18,568 Any reason you don't have plates on this car? 174 00:07:18,612 --> 00:07:20,396 We don't? [chuckles] 175 00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:21,876 Well, uh, daughter's car. 176 00:07:21,919 --> 00:07:23,312 She's inside getting ice cream. 177 00:07:23,355 --> 00:07:25,227 You're gonna have to take it up with her. 178 00:07:25,270 --> 00:07:29,100 You're the only one here, so I'm taking it up with you. 179 00:07:29,144 --> 00:07:31,233 Okay. [inhales sharply] 180 00:07:31,276 --> 00:07:33,714 If I had to hazard a guess-- new car, 181 00:07:33,757 --> 00:07:36,630 plates are probably in a pile of unopened bills on her desk, 182 00:07:36,673 --> 00:07:38,327 and if you bug her about it, 183 00:07:38,370 --> 00:07:40,155 you're gonna get a bit of an earful. 184 00:07:40,198 --> 00:07:42,636 Hmm. License and registration. 185 00:07:42,679 --> 00:07:46,944 Man, must be a slow crime day in... nowhere. 186 00:07:46,988 --> 00:07:49,817 This make you feel like a big man? 187 00:07:49,860 --> 00:07:51,253 [handcuffs click] 188 00:07:51,296 --> 00:07:52,776 Ow! Pinchy! Pinchy! 189 00:07:55,126 --> 00:07:57,564 I was gone for five minutes! 190 00:07:57,607 --> 00:07:59,261 What did you do? 191 00:07:59,304 --> 00:08:01,829 I ran out on some parking tickets 20 years ago, 192 00:08:01,872 --> 00:08:04,092 which wasn't a problem until we came to Nevada, 193 00:08:04,135 --> 00:08:06,355 and you didn't put your license plates on! 194 00:08:06,398 --> 00:08:08,357 I told you I'll get to it. 195 00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:10,272 Oh. Okay then. No hurry. 196 00:08:10,315 --> 00:08:12,622 All right, let's go. 197 00:08:12,666 --> 00:08:16,234 Wait, wait, wait. Give me a lick of that before they lock me up. 198 00:08:16,278 --> 00:08:18,585 Ooh. Brain freeze! Brain freeze! 199 00:08:24,852 --> 00:08:28,159 Can you actually type with those sausages? 200 00:08:28,943 --> 00:08:30,945 I do all right. 201 00:08:30,988 --> 00:08:32,599 Well, pick up the pace. 202 00:08:32,642 --> 00:08:34,601 We've got hot stone massages at 5:00. 203 00:08:34,644 --> 00:08:36,646 I told you, this one's got a mouth on her. 204 00:08:36,690 --> 00:08:38,735 Check out the space between his eyes. 205 00:08:38,779 --> 00:08:40,171 Hey, hey, 206 00:08:40,215 --> 00:08:41,912 no talking in code. 207 00:08:43,566 --> 00:08:45,525 Listen, Officer, this is all my fault. 208 00:08:45,568 --> 00:08:48,005 I'm the one who forgot to put the plates on my car. 209 00:08:48,049 --> 00:08:49,398 Hey, Sarg, you want me to write her up for that? 210 00:08:49,441 --> 00:08:50,617 I could write her up for that. 211 00:08:50,660 --> 00:08:52,096 Look, Terry, 212 00:08:52,140 --> 00:08:54,272 why don't you head over to the middle school, 213 00:08:54,316 --> 00:08:56,797 and see if they finished repainting that crosswalk? 214 00:08:56,840 --> 00:09:00,235 On it. Call me if things go sideways with String Bean. 215 00:09:00,278 --> 00:09:01,628 That's you. 216 00:09:01,671 --> 00:09:03,368 We have codes, too. 217 00:09:08,504 --> 00:09:11,159 All right, Ms. Plunkett, follow me. 218 00:09:12,377 --> 00:09:14,423 Oh. Oh, come on. 219 00:09:14,466 --> 00:09:16,947 Is this really necessary? Can't we just pay? 220 00:09:16,991 --> 00:09:20,081 Oh, sure, if you have $2,185. 221 00:09:20,124 --> 00:09:23,606 Get in there. 222 00:09:23,650 --> 00:09:25,608 If you don't want me in here for murder, call Adam, 223 00:09:25,652 --> 00:09:27,131 have him transfer the money to your account, 224 00:09:27,175 --> 00:09:28,829 and then go to an ATM and get it. 225 00:09:28,872 --> 00:09:31,266 Is there a bank nearby? 226 00:09:31,309 --> 00:09:34,269 No, but there's a hotel 12 miles south of here 227 00:09:34,312 --> 00:09:36,097 with a high-limit ATM. 228 00:09:36,140 --> 00:09:38,839 Okay, I'll be back as soon as I can. 229 00:09:38,882 --> 00:09:40,667 Hey, real quick. 230 00:09:40,710 --> 00:09:44,192 Isn't that a lot of ring for someone you just met? 231 00:09:44,235 --> 00:09:46,281 Go!Right, right. 232 00:09:46,324 --> 00:09:47,761 Hotel, 12 miles north. 233 00:09:47,804 --> 00:09:50,459 South! South! Got it. 234 00:09:50,502 --> 00:09:54,158 So which gang do I have to join to survive in here? 235 00:09:57,553 --> 00:10:00,948 [laughing]: Wait. She's actually in a little jail cell 236 00:10:00,991 --> 00:10:02,776 like Otis the drunk? 237 00:10:02,819 --> 00:10:04,647 I don't know who that is. 238 00:10:04,691 --> 00:10:07,650 You know, Mayberry? Andy Griffith, Opie. 239 00:10:07,694 --> 00:10:09,652 CHRISTY: Adam.It's so funny. 240 00:10:09,696 --> 00:10:12,829 Otis would get drunk and then lock himself in the cell. 241 00:10:12,873 --> 00:10:15,179 Boy, self, cell, that's hard to say. 242 00:10:15,223 --> 00:10:18,661 Do you get high the minute my mom goes out of town? 243 00:10:18,705 --> 00:10:20,532 Eh, pretty much. 244 00:10:20,576 --> 00:10:23,318 Can you transfer the bail money or not? 245 00:10:23,361 --> 00:10:25,233 On one condition: you get a video of her 246 00:10:25,276 --> 00:10:27,714 raking a tin cup across the bars. [laughs] 247 00:10:27,757 --> 00:10:29,367 I don't get that either. 248 00:10:29,411 --> 00:10:31,369 Stop being old and just send me the money. 249 00:10:31,413 --> 00:10:33,676 Yeah, yeah. How much was it again? 250 00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:37,071 $2,150. 251 00:10:37,114 --> 00:10:39,203 I can handle the rest. 252 00:10:39,247 --> 00:10:40,596 Well, how much is the rest? 253 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:43,207 $35. 254 00:10:43,251 --> 00:10:45,819 I'll send it right now. 255 00:10:45,862 --> 00:10:47,908 Thanks. Bye. 256 00:10:47,951 --> 00:10:50,693 [crowd cheering on TV] 257 00:10:50,737 --> 00:10:53,870 [chuckles] 258 00:10:53,914 --> 00:10:56,743 Mmm. 259 00:10:56,786 --> 00:10:58,875 [chuckles] 260 00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:03,663 Oh, yeah. 261 00:11:11,714 --> 00:11:13,934 Uh... 262 00:11:13,977 --> 00:11:15,544 Can I ask you a question? 263 00:11:15,587 --> 00:11:18,852 I don't know. I'm pretty busy in here. 264 00:11:18,895 --> 00:11:23,247 How did you rack up 17 parking tickets over one weekend? 265 00:11:23,291 --> 00:11:26,990 What the hell was going on December, 1999? 266 00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:28,426 Y2K was going on. 267 00:11:28,470 --> 00:11:30,472 A lot of dummies thought the world was gonna end. 268 00:11:30,515 --> 00:11:32,735 Not just dummies. 269 00:11:32,779 --> 00:11:34,868 Continue. 270 00:11:34,911 --> 00:11:39,350 I had this boyfriend, Dale-- Dwayne... 271 00:11:39,394 --> 00:11:41,570 that doesn't matter. 272 00:11:41,613 --> 00:11:43,311 Anyway we realized, people freaking out, 273 00:11:43,354 --> 00:11:44,878 good time to sell a lot of drugs. 274 00:11:44,921 --> 00:11:47,271 So we hopped in our car with our hearts full of hope 275 00:11:47,315 --> 00:11:49,752 and a trash bag full of Mexican Quaaludes. 276 00:11:49,796 --> 00:11:53,408 You do know you have the right to remain silent? 277 00:11:53,451 --> 00:11:55,715 Yeah, that's never been my thing. 278 00:11:55,758 --> 00:11:58,108 Anyway, we promptly got really high 279 00:11:58,152 --> 00:11:59,762 and forgot where we parked the car. 280 00:11:59,806 --> 00:12:01,285 Donny. 281 00:12:01,329 --> 00:12:03,810 No.[ringtone plays] 282 00:12:06,334 --> 00:12:08,466 Hey, honey. 283 00:12:08,510 --> 00:12:11,469 [sighs] What'd she do now? 284 00:12:11,513 --> 00:12:14,559 Oh, God. 285 00:12:14,603 --> 00:12:16,431 No. I-I can't pick her up. 286 00:12:16,474 --> 00:12:19,608 I have someone in the cell. 287 00:12:19,651 --> 00:12:21,653 Well, then, just let her sit there. 288 00:12:21,697 --> 00:12:24,482 That'll teach her... something? 289 00:12:24,526 --> 00:12:26,484 [sighs] 290 00:12:26,528 --> 00:12:27,921 Yeah, a-all right. All right. 291 00:12:27,964 --> 00:12:29,531 I-I got to go. 292 00:12:34,188 --> 00:12:35,319 What'd she do? 293 00:12:35,363 --> 00:12:37,147 Huh? What? 294 00:12:37,191 --> 00:12:38,758 I know what a "my daughter screwed up" 295 00:12:38,801 --> 00:12:40,063 phone call sounds like. 296 00:12:40,107 --> 00:12:41,673 You got one, too? 297 00:12:41,717 --> 00:12:42,979 You just met her. 298 00:12:43,023 --> 00:12:44,633 Oh, she seemed okay. 299 00:12:44,676 --> 00:12:47,331 Yeah, sure, now, after I cleaned her up. 300 00:12:47,375 --> 00:12:49,507 I pretty much saved her life. 301 00:12:49,551 --> 00:12:51,901 Drugs, alcohol, stripping, gambling-- 302 00:12:51,945 --> 00:12:53,773 name a problem, she's had it. 303 00:12:53,816 --> 00:12:55,600 Gambling? 304 00:12:55,644 --> 00:12:58,865 We lost our house 'cause the Packers didn't cover. 305 00:12:58,908 --> 00:13:00,910 Huh.What? 306 00:13:00,954 --> 00:13:03,608 Well, I just sent her 307 00:13:03,652 --> 00:13:06,394 to an ATM machine in the middle of a casino. 308 00:13:07,917 --> 00:13:11,094 Huh. 309 00:13:11,138 --> 00:13:13,140 ♪ 310 00:13:22,062 --> 00:13:25,065 [cheering] 311 00:13:29,243 --> 00:13:30,635 Mom's in jail. Mom's in jail. 312 00:13:30,679 --> 00:13:31,767 Mom's in jail. 313 00:13:41,298 --> 00:13:43,213 Oh, come on. It's not the end of the world. 314 00:13:43,257 --> 00:13:44,736 I took a swing at my teacher 315 00:13:44,780 --> 00:13:46,042 when I was your daughter's age. 316 00:13:46,086 --> 00:13:48,958 And look at you now. 317 00:13:50,612 --> 00:13:52,222 I just don't get it. 318 00:13:52,266 --> 00:13:55,051 For 15 years, Sarah was my little girl. 319 00:13:55,095 --> 00:13:57,097 She told me everything. 320 00:13:57,140 --> 00:13:59,490 And one day, she walks into her bedroom, 321 00:13:59,534 --> 00:14:01,188 she closes the door, 322 00:14:01,231 --> 00:14:03,538 and I haven't seen her since. 323 00:14:03,581 --> 00:14:05,975 I got news for you, it's only gonna get harder. 324 00:14:06,019 --> 00:14:07,716 But don't give up on her. 325 00:14:07,759 --> 00:14:09,631 Sure, you're gonna want to pack your bags and take off, 326 00:14:09,674 --> 00:14:11,981 leave her to fend for herself, and who could blame you? 327 00:14:12,025 --> 00:14:13,896 Who does that to a child? 328 00:14:15,463 --> 00:14:18,596 No one. 329 00:14:18,640 --> 00:14:21,382 You kinda sounded like you were ready to split. 330 00:14:21,425 --> 00:14:23,384 I just said it was hard.All right, all right. 331 00:14:23,427 --> 00:14:25,299 I was just working with what you were giving me. 332 00:14:25,342 --> 00:14:27,649 Another soda? 333 00:14:27,692 --> 00:14:29,346 I'm good. 334 00:14:34,482 --> 00:14:36,223 So what's to stop me from just 335 00:14:36,266 --> 00:14:37,789 making a run for it right now? 336 00:14:37,833 --> 00:14:39,443 Nothing, really. 337 00:14:39,487 --> 00:14:41,619 But it's 110 degrees out there 338 00:14:41,663 --> 00:14:43,447 and we're in the middle of nowhere. 339 00:14:43,491 --> 00:14:46,233 Right. Right. 340 00:14:56,765 --> 00:14:59,333 [cheering] 341 00:15:01,988 --> 00:15:03,337 Yo-leven![cheering] 342 00:15:06,340 --> 00:15:09,299 Don't you leave, sugar, you're my good luck. 343 00:15:09,343 --> 00:15:10,648 Let her ride! 344 00:15:10,692 --> 00:15:12,694 [cheering] 345 00:15:20,397 --> 00:15:22,443 [gasping] 346 00:15:22,486 --> 00:15:25,489 It's... 347 00:15:25,533 --> 00:15:27,361 hot out there. 348 00:15:33,323 --> 00:15:34,890 You see any snakes? 349 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,283 Six. 350 00:15:36,326 --> 00:15:37,545 Yeah. 351 00:15:43,594 --> 00:15:45,292 Come on, baby, work with me. 352 00:15:45,335 --> 00:15:47,685 Anything but seven. Anything but seven. 353 00:15:49,383 --> 00:15:50,558 Seven out. 354 00:15:50,601 --> 00:15:53,996 No! That's my mom's bail money! 355 00:15:54,040 --> 00:15:56,303 I can give you a coupon to the buffet. 356 00:15:56,346 --> 00:15:59,175 Can I bet it? 357 00:16:02,700 --> 00:16:04,137 You are paying me a hundred dollars an hour; 358 00:16:04,180 --> 00:16:05,921 at some point, we should probably work on your serve. 359 00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:08,010 Oh, please, we both know 360 00:16:08,054 --> 00:16:09,620 I'm a better tennis player than you. 361 00:16:10,839 --> 00:16:12,841 [ringtone plays] 362 00:16:14,060 --> 00:16:15,626 [sighs] 363 00:16:15,670 --> 00:16:17,019 Oh, my God, what? 364 00:16:17,063 --> 00:16:19,195 I'm in the middle of a tennis lesson. 365 00:16:19,239 --> 00:16:21,502 I am so sorry, but it's an emergency. 366 00:16:21,545 --> 00:16:23,025 My mom just got arrested 367 00:16:23,069 --> 00:16:24,679 and I need to borrow two grand for bail. 368 00:16:24,722 --> 00:16:26,898 Arrested?CHRISTY: Yeah. 369 00:16:26,942 --> 00:16:28,683 It happened five minutes ago. 370 00:16:28,726 --> 00:16:30,902 You're the first person I thought of to call. 371 00:16:30,946 --> 00:16:33,427 Aw. Aw. 372 00:16:35,211 --> 00:16:37,170 Text me something about your account. 373 00:16:37,213 --> 00:16:39,085 I got to go. Bye. 374 00:16:43,437 --> 00:16:44,960 This is her last year. 375 00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:46,570 She's adorable. 376 00:16:46,614 --> 00:16:48,485 This is her now. 377 00:16:48,529 --> 00:16:50,922 Wow, that's a lot of eyeliner. 378 00:16:50,966 --> 00:16:53,708 Yeah, and you really notice it 379 00:16:53,751 --> 00:16:55,927 since she shaved her head. 380 00:16:55,971 --> 00:16:59,322 Uh, Christy was a pretty difficult teenager, too, 381 00:16:59,366 --> 00:17:02,195 though some of that was hormones from the pregnancy. 382 00:17:02,238 --> 00:17:04,240 Oh, God. Just keep trying. 383 00:17:04,284 --> 00:17:05,763 She's gonna keep pushing you away, 384 00:17:05,807 --> 00:17:08,070 but one day that bedroom door will open again 385 00:17:08,114 --> 00:17:10,029 and she'll be glad you're standing there. 386 00:17:10,072 --> 00:17:11,247 I hope you're right. 387 00:17:11,291 --> 00:17:14,076 I'm always right. 388 00:17:14,120 --> 00:17:16,165 Never in a million years would I have thought 389 00:17:16,209 --> 00:17:18,080 I'd have such a wonderful, loving relationship 390 00:17:18,124 --> 00:17:19,603 with my daughter.CHRISTY: Mom. 391 00:17:19,647 --> 00:17:20,909 Where the hell have you been? 392 00:17:20,952 --> 00:17:22,606 I thought you left me here to rot! 393 00:17:22,650 --> 00:17:25,218 Darling. 394 00:17:25,261 --> 00:17:26,741 I'm sorry. 395 00:17:26,784 --> 00:17:28,699 We'll talk about it in the car. Pay the man. 396 00:17:28,743 --> 00:17:30,397 I can't. 397 00:17:32,790 --> 00:17:36,185 Oh, God, Christy, you gambled Adam's money. 398 00:17:36,229 --> 00:17:38,361 I did. [sighs] 399 00:17:38,405 --> 00:17:40,102 So then I called Jill. 400 00:17:40,146 --> 00:17:43,236 And you gambled Jill's money, too? 401 00:17:43,279 --> 00:17:46,065 It all happened so fast. 402 00:17:46,108 --> 00:17:49,807 I'm not sure I understand pai gow. 403 00:17:49,851 --> 00:17:53,811 So what, I'm gonna do hard time for parking tickets? 404 00:17:53,855 --> 00:17:56,205 Yes... 'cause your daughter's a loser. 405 00:17:56,249 --> 00:17:58,120 That's why Patrick didn't want to be with me, 406 00:17:58,164 --> 00:17:59,861 that's why I didn't get into law school, 407 00:17:59,904 --> 00:18:01,645 that's why I hit on a soft 19. 408 00:18:01,689 --> 00:18:05,171 Oof.I know, right? 409 00:18:05,214 --> 00:18:09,175 Okay. Well, what time's dinner? 410 00:18:09,218 --> 00:18:11,090 You know, Bonnie, 411 00:18:11,133 --> 00:18:14,005 these computers can be a bit glitchy. 412 00:18:14,049 --> 00:18:15,659 Damn it, Gene, I've got enough on my plate 413 00:18:15,703 --> 00:18:18,401 without worrying about your problems. 414 00:18:18,445 --> 00:18:20,664 I'm saying, 415 00:18:20,708 --> 00:18:22,927 maybe your arrest record 416 00:18:22,971 --> 00:18:24,842 somehow disappeared. 417 00:18:24,886 --> 00:18:26,322 How about... 418 00:18:26,366 --> 00:18:28,324 you take care of your daughter, 419 00:18:28,368 --> 00:18:30,152 I'll go take care of mine? 420 00:18:30,196 --> 00:18:31,371 Really? 421 00:18:31,414 --> 00:18:32,763 Really. 422 00:18:32,807 --> 00:18:34,417 Christy, go outside and pull the car right up 423 00:18:34,461 --> 00:18:36,419 to the front door and blast the air conditioning. 424 00:18:36,463 --> 00:18:38,073 That I can do. 425 00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:39,901 Watch out for snakes. 426 00:18:43,905 --> 00:18:45,124 Thank you. 427 00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:47,952 And hang in there with your daughter. 428 00:18:47,996 --> 00:18:49,345 Don't be discouraged by this. 429 00:18:49,389 --> 00:18:50,520 Roger that. 430 00:18:50,564 --> 00:18:52,131 Bonnie? 431 00:18:52,174 --> 00:18:53,262 Yeah. 432 00:18:53,306 --> 00:18:56,265 Never come back to Nevada. 433 00:18:56,309 --> 00:18:58,789 I'll add it to the list. 434 00:19:06,841 --> 00:19:08,669 Hey, you missed the exit for the spa. 435 00:19:08,712 --> 00:19:09,931 We can't go to the spa. 436 00:19:09,974 --> 00:19:11,019 Why not? 437 00:19:11,062 --> 00:19:12,412 Because I don't deserve it. 438 00:19:13,717 --> 00:19:16,155 Stupid pai gow. 439 00:19:16,198 --> 00:19:17,765 I do. I'm covered in jail stink, 440 00:19:17,808 --> 00:19:19,027 and I'm getting a salt scrub. 441 00:19:19,070 --> 00:19:20,550 I don't know what it is, I may hate it, 442 00:19:20,594 --> 00:19:21,943 but I'm getting it. 443 00:19:21,986 --> 00:19:23,727 Followed by a selection of artisanal cheeses 444 00:19:23,771 --> 00:19:25,207 I saw on the website. 445 00:19:26,556 --> 00:19:28,254 That does sound nice. 446 00:19:28,297 --> 00:19:29,951 Oh, no cheese for you. You're staying in the room. 447 00:19:29,994 --> 00:19:31,779 You can look out the window, but only at the parking lot, 448 00:19:31,822 --> 00:19:33,041 not at the mountain. 449 00:19:34,347 --> 00:19:36,087 That seems fair. 450 00:19:36,131 --> 00:19:38,394 Okay, I'll double back. 451 00:19:44,661 --> 00:19:46,620 [siren chirps] 452 00:19:46,663 --> 00:19:48,230 Son of a bitch. 453 00:19:48,274 --> 00:19:50,580 You didn't do anything illegal in Nevada, did you? 454 00:19:52,278 --> 00:19:54,062 I guess we're gonna find out. 455 00:19:54,105 --> 00:19:56,238 Captioning sponsored by CBS 456 00:19:56,282 --> 00:19:57,283 and WARNER BROS. TELEVISION 457 00:20:02,026 --> 00:20:03,332 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 31840

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