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1
00:00:01,436 --> 00:00:04,004
Previously onMom...You guys hear that?
2
00:00:04,047 --> 00:00:05,701
Jill'’s figured out what's
missing in her life.
3
00:00:05,744 --> 00:00:07,050
Great. What is it?
4
00:00:07,094 --> 00:00:08,225
I need to have a baby.
5
00:00:08,269 --> 00:00:09,487
Don'’t get me wrong.
6
00:00:09,531 --> 00:00:11,185
I love her,
but Jill is the last person
7
00:00:11,228 --> 00:00:12,751
in the world
who should be having a baby.
8
00:00:12,795 --> 00:00:14,014
So what'’s the plan?
9
00:00:14,057 --> 00:00:15,580
I don'’t know.
10
00:00:15,624 --> 00:00:17,800
Figure out a way to talk her
out of this baby craziness.
11
00:00:17,843 --> 00:00:19,671
I will tell her
how painful it was
12
00:00:19,715 --> 00:00:21,282
when you came out
of me feet-first.
13
00:00:21,325 --> 00:00:24,415
I came out feet-first
so I could run.
14
00:00:24,459 --> 00:00:25,808
Jill Kendall?
15
00:00:25,851 --> 00:00:28,245
Jill, don'’t do this.
16
00:00:28,289 --> 00:00:30,769
Being a parent is hard,
it'’s exhausting,
17
00:00:30,813 --> 00:00:32,597
and you are not
cut out for it.
18
00:00:35,122 --> 00:00:37,689
I never want to talk
to you again.
19
00:00:40,083 --> 00:00:43,304
I'’m not sure why we're buying
Jill a birthday present.
20
00:00:43,347 --> 00:00:44,870
She'’s barely
speaking to me.
21
00:00:44,914 --> 00:00:46,394
Well, that'’s what happens
when you tell someone
22
00:00:46,437 --> 00:00:48,570
they'’re not fit to reproduce.
23
00:00:48,613 --> 00:00:50,528
Do youthink it'’s a good
idea for her to have a baby?
24
00:00:50,572 --> 00:00:52,965
God, no. I was gonna wait
till she actually has a kid
25
00:00:53,009 --> 00:00:55,838
and then talk about her behind
her back, like a true friend.
26
00:00:55,881 --> 00:00:58,623
Let'’s just find something
for under a hundred bucks
27
00:00:58,667 --> 00:01:01,017
so I can go to
work and earn 75.
28
00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:02,149
What about these gloves?
29
00:01:02,192 --> 00:01:04,412
We can buy one.
30
00:01:04,455 --> 00:01:05,500
[sighs]
31
00:01:05,543 --> 00:01:07,719
Okay, let'’s spread out. Hey.
32
00:01:07,763 --> 00:01:09,199
If you see something nice,
damage it.
33
00:01:09,243 --> 00:01:10,853
Maybe we'’ll get a break.
[clicks tongue]
34
00:01:18,861 --> 00:01:20,167
[humming softly]
35
00:01:20,210 --> 00:01:21,516
May I help you with something?
36
00:01:21,559 --> 00:01:23,213
I'’m just browsing.
37
00:01:23,257 --> 00:01:25,128
Yeah, I sensed that.
38
00:01:25,172 --> 00:01:27,522
Kind of a lot to spend
39
00:01:27,565 --> 00:01:30,046
on a piece of plastic with
a fancy name on the side.
40
00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:34,094
Those are hand-carved tortoise
shell with 18-karat gold hinges.
41
00:01:34,137 --> 00:01:36,139
Oh. Didn'’t know that.
42
00:01:36,183 --> 00:01:37,706
Why would you?
43
00:01:39,490 --> 00:01:40,883
Score!
44
00:01:40,926 --> 00:01:42,537
Really? It'’s kind of ugly.
45
00:01:42,580 --> 00:01:43,973
It'’s on sale-- 80 bucks.
46
00:01:44,016 --> 00:01:45,583
We would like
to purchase this.
47
00:01:45,627 --> 00:01:47,585
I'’ll ring it up.
48
00:01:47,629 --> 00:01:49,674
If you'’re still interested
in sunglasses,
49
00:01:49,718 --> 00:01:51,937
there'’s a Walgreens
down the street.
50
00:01:54,070 --> 00:01:56,855
The sad thing is, we doneed
to go to Walgreens.
51
00:01:59,336 --> 00:02:02,687
I'’ll buy her a tube
of bitch cream.
52
00:02:02,731 --> 00:02:05,560
Will that be cash
or credit card?
53
00:02:05,603 --> 00:02:07,692
Well, I'’ve got
eight credit cards.
54
00:02:07,736 --> 00:02:09,912
Let'’s spin the wheel
and see which one'’s good.
55
00:02:15,265 --> 00:02:16,788
Meet you at the car, Mom.
56
00:02:16,832 --> 00:02:17,963
Okay.
57
00:02:19,182 --> 00:02:20,575
Whew! Blockbuster.
58
00:02:20,618 --> 00:02:22,142
You don'’t see these
anymore, do you?
59
00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:27,059
Blink if you'’re here
against your will.
60
00:02:29,975 --> 00:02:31,890
♪
61
00:02:46,731 --> 00:02:48,559
Can you believe that
saleswoman? [scoffs]
62
00:02:48,603 --> 00:02:50,126
Acts like she'’s royalty,
63
00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:52,215
but you know she'’s eating
a Blimpie for lunch.
64
00:02:52,259 --> 00:02:53,695
Bet she was in a bunch
65
00:02:53,738 --> 00:02:55,740
of those little kid
beauty pageants and never won.
66
00:02:55,784 --> 00:02:56,698
[chuckles]
67
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,485
Are those new?
68
00:03:01,529 --> 00:03:03,661
These? No.
69
00:03:03,705 --> 00:03:05,097
Are you sure?
70
00:03:05,141 --> 00:03:06,534
I'’ve never seen 'em.
71
00:03:06,577 --> 00:03:08,057
Yeah, had '’em a while.
72
00:03:08,100 --> 00:03:10,233
Just been out of the rotation.
73
00:03:10,277 --> 00:03:11,669
You'’re gonna stick
with that story,
74
00:03:11,713 --> 00:03:13,280
even with the price tag
still on '’em?
75
00:03:13,323 --> 00:03:14,759
What?
76
00:03:14,803 --> 00:03:18,241
Oh. Uh... Huh.
77
00:03:18,285 --> 00:03:22,463
If you were gonna shoplift, you
could'’ve taken the scarf, too.
78
00:03:22,506 --> 00:03:24,639
I just hated that woman so much.
79
00:03:24,682 --> 00:03:27,772
She treated me like white trash
who couldn'’t afford nice things.
80
00:03:27,816 --> 00:03:29,339
You are, and you can'’t.
81
00:03:29,383 --> 00:03:31,472
I know!
82
00:03:31,515 --> 00:03:33,343
They are beautiful.
83
00:03:33,387 --> 00:03:35,867
You look like
a movie star.
84
00:03:35,911 --> 00:03:39,480
Especially the ones who
go crazy and steal stuff.
85
00:03:39,523 --> 00:03:41,090
It'’s just not fair.
86
00:03:41,133 --> 00:03:43,179
I work my ass off, I'’m sober,
87
00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:45,834
I give a penny way more
than I take a penny,
88
00:03:45,877 --> 00:03:47,488
and what do I get?
89
00:03:47,531 --> 00:03:50,317
Drugstore sunglasses
that aren'’t even polarized.
90
00:03:50,360 --> 00:03:52,667
What does that mean
exactly-- "polarized"?
91
00:03:52,710 --> 00:03:54,886
I don'’t know,
but I deserve polarized!
92
00:03:54,930 --> 00:03:56,671
Save it for Judge Judy.
93
00:03:56,714 --> 00:03:58,716
Just drive.
94
00:03:58,760 --> 00:04:01,371
Your outstanding warrant
is in Nevada, right?
95
00:04:01,415 --> 00:04:03,721
I said drive!
96
00:04:05,375 --> 00:04:06,985
What?
97
00:04:07,029 --> 00:04:08,509
Nothing.
98
00:04:08,552 --> 00:04:10,032
You just look so small
99
00:04:10,075 --> 00:04:12,252
from up here on the
moral high ground.
100
00:04:15,167 --> 00:04:16,517
This one'’s from me.
101
00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:19,041
Oh, thank you,
Marjorie.
102
00:04:20,172 --> 00:04:23,132
Oh! A book!
103
00:04:23,175 --> 00:04:26,004
With no words in it.
104
00:04:26,048 --> 00:04:28,006
That'’s what
the pen is for.
105
00:04:28,050 --> 00:04:29,660
Writing in a journal--
106
00:04:29,704 --> 00:04:32,141
it helps you process your
thoughts and feelings.
107
00:04:32,184 --> 00:04:36,058
Fun!
108
00:04:36,101 --> 00:04:38,365
In fact, I'’m gonna write that.
109
00:04:38,408 --> 00:04:41,455
"This... is... fun."
110
00:04:42,543 --> 00:04:44,327
Exclamation point!
111
00:04:45,807 --> 00:04:48,157
Here'’s a gift
that isn'’t like homework.
112
00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:49,201
From me
113
00:04:49,245 --> 00:04:50,333
and Christy.
114
00:04:50,377 --> 00:04:51,682
Oh, thanks, Bonnie.
115
00:04:51,726 --> 00:04:52,901
[flatly]:
Christy.
116
00:04:52,944 --> 00:04:55,338
Come on. I said I'’m sorry.
117
00:04:55,382 --> 00:04:57,166
I'’m sure you'll be
a great mother.
118
00:04:57,209 --> 00:04:59,908
This is my birthday, Christy.
Let'’s not make this about you.
119
00:05:01,213 --> 00:05:03,303
Oh!
120
00:05:03,346 --> 00:05:06,915
That is a lot of color!
121
00:05:07,916 --> 00:05:09,352
Thanks, Bonnie.
122
00:05:09,396 --> 00:05:12,224
[flatly]:
Christy.
123
00:05:12,268 --> 00:05:14,792
I'’m starting to feel really
bad about my gift card.
124
00:05:14,836 --> 00:05:17,142
Oh, don'’t.
I'’m sure I'll love it.
125
00:05:19,580 --> 00:05:22,800
[gasps]
Oh, Wendy, thank you!
126
00:05:22,844 --> 00:05:23,758
Do you like it?
127
00:05:23,801 --> 00:05:25,368
I do.
128
00:05:25,412 --> 00:05:27,892
I'’ve always wanted
to go to a Best Buy.
129
00:05:29,198 --> 00:05:31,156
Now I guess I have to.
130
00:05:32,419 --> 00:05:34,725
Thanks, everybody.
131
00:05:34,769 --> 00:05:37,554
The best gift is having
you guys in my life.
132
00:05:37,598 --> 00:05:39,208
[flatly]:
And you, Christy.
133
00:05:39,251 --> 00:05:40,601
[sighs]
134
00:05:40,644 --> 00:05:42,167
Those new sunglasses?
135
00:05:42,211 --> 00:05:44,866
Indeed they are,
and they come with a story.
136
00:05:47,085 --> 00:05:48,478
What'’s the story?
137
00:05:48,522 --> 00:05:50,611
I thought I lost '’em,
then I found '’em.
138
00:05:50,654 --> 00:05:52,047
Not much of a story.
139
00:05:52,090 --> 00:05:53,831
Nobody gets killed,
nobody gets laid.
140
00:05:55,964 --> 00:05:57,400
Those are Prada.
141
00:05:57,444 --> 00:05:59,141
No, they'’re not.
They'’re knockoffs.
142
00:05:59,184 --> 00:06:00,708
Knockoffs are everything else
you'’re wearing.
143
00:06:00,751 --> 00:06:02,318
Those babies are Prada.
144
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:04,668
Do me a favor. Just go back
to freezing me out.
145
00:06:04,712 --> 00:06:06,583
Whatever do you mean?
146
00:06:06,627 --> 00:06:08,629
What are you writing?
Is that about me?
147
00:06:08,672 --> 00:06:10,239
No.
148
00:06:10,282 --> 00:06:11,849
"Hateful" has one "L."
149
00:06:16,114 --> 00:06:17,638
Why are you turning here?
150
00:06:17,681 --> 00:06:19,074
Adam'’s coming over later.
151
00:06:19,117 --> 00:06:21,468
I'’m gonna get
him some beer.
152
00:06:21,511 --> 00:06:25,385
You want to wait in the car or
come in and steal something?
153
00:06:25,428 --> 00:06:27,256
A lot of choices by
the cash register.
154
00:06:27,299 --> 00:06:29,867
Slim Jims, couple of
freckled bananas.
155
00:06:29,911 --> 00:06:32,348
How long are you gonna roast me
on this thing?
156
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:34,045
Hard to say.
It'’s kind of like gum.
157
00:06:34,089 --> 00:06:35,960
You never know
when it'’s gonna lose its flavor.
158
00:06:36,004 --> 00:06:38,180
Hey, you can steal gum.
159
00:06:38,223 --> 00:06:41,792
Hilarious.
160
00:06:41,836 --> 00:06:43,577
You'’re in a handicap spot.
161
00:06:43,620 --> 00:06:45,274
No problem.
162
00:06:46,884 --> 00:06:49,452
What'’s that?
Is that Adam'’s thingie?
163
00:06:49,496 --> 00:06:53,151
Of course not. I borrowed his,
copied it at Kinko'’s, and voila.
164
00:06:53,195 --> 00:06:55,110
It'’s laminated.
165
00:06:55,153 --> 00:06:57,808
Yeah, I do good work.
166
00:06:57,852 --> 00:07:01,203
So that'’s a counterfeit
handicap placard?
167
00:07:01,246 --> 00:07:03,771
Keep your voice down.
168
00:07:03,814 --> 00:07:05,250
How could you do this?
169
00:07:05,294 --> 00:07:07,339
I am running an errand
for a handicapped person.
170
00:07:07,383 --> 00:07:09,994
So, therefore, placard
privileges transfer to me.
171
00:07:10,038 --> 00:07:11,474
No, they don'’t.
172
00:07:11,518 --> 00:07:12,693
Well, they should.
173
00:07:12,736 --> 00:07:14,477
Or are you in favor
of a disabled person
174
00:07:14,521 --> 00:07:16,305
getting his beer at a slower
rate than other people?
175
00:07:16,348 --> 00:07:17,959
Because if so,
[scoffs] wow.
176
00:07:18,002 --> 00:07:18,916
[scoffs]
177
00:07:25,270 --> 00:07:27,229
[siren whoops]
178
00:07:30,275 --> 00:07:31,799
Hold it right there, please.
179
00:07:31,842 --> 00:07:33,670
Me?
180
00:07:33,714 --> 00:07:35,324
Hi there.
181
00:07:35,367 --> 00:07:37,326
You realize
you'’re in a handicap spot?
182
00:07:37,369 --> 00:07:40,111
Yes, I am.
183
00:07:40,155 --> 00:07:42,157
And as you can see,
I have a placard.
184
00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:43,680
That issued to you?
185
00:07:43,724 --> 00:07:45,290
Well, yes, of course.
186
00:07:45,334 --> 00:07:48,511
I had... both my
hips replaced.
187
00:07:48,555 --> 00:07:51,688
Still working
out the kinks.
188
00:07:51,732 --> 00:07:54,256
Mommy, do the limp again!
189
00:07:55,562 --> 00:07:57,172
I need to see your I.D.
190
00:07:57,215 --> 00:07:59,348
How about you
show me your I.D.?
191
00:07:59,391 --> 00:08:02,046
'’Cause all I'm seeing are some
skin-tight shorts and a bicycle.
192
00:08:02,090 --> 00:08:03,439
For all I know,
you could be
193
00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:05,833
on your way to a
bachelorette party.
194
00:08:05,876 --> 00:08:07,965
I mean, you'’re very
handsome. It'’s possible.
195
00:08:08,009 --> 00:08:10,185
Just show me your license
and registration.
196
00:08:10,228 --> 00:08:14,363
Okay, look... it'’s my
boyfriend'’s placard.
197
00:08:14,406 --> 00:08:15,886
I don'’t see a boyfriend.
198
00:08:15,930 --> 00:08:18,802
You do not because
he is at home,
199
00:08:18,846 --> 00:08:21,979
confined to his wheelchair,
just waiting for the one thing
200
00:08:22,023 --> 00:08:25,635
that helps him get through his
lonely, handicapped day: beer.
201
00:08:25,679 --> 00:08:27,985
It'’s probably hard
for you to imagine
202
00:08:28,029 --> 00:08:30,640
with your
perfectly-muscled legs.
203
00:08:30,684 --> 00:08:32,076
I'’m gonna have to cite you.
204
00:08:32,120 --> 00:08:34,339
Ah, son of a bitch.
How about this?
205
00:08:34,383 --> 00:08:36,385
I just move my car
to another spot,
206
00:08:36,428 --> 00:08:38,300
and we can file this one
under "lesson learned."
207
00:08:38,343 --> 00:08:39,301
Too late, ma'’am.
208
00:08:39,344 --> 00:08:40,911
Officer, if you put me
209
00:08:40,955 --> 00:08:42,391
in the witness protection
program,
210
00:08:42,434 --> 00:08:44,088
I'’ll tell you everything!
211
00:08:44,132 --> 00:08:46,090
Pipe down, sunglasses!
212
00:08:47,962 --> 00:08:50,442
How about I just jump
in my car and drive off?
213
00:08:50,486 --> 00:08:52,444
You think you can catch me
on your little Schwinn?
214
00:08:52,488 --> 00:08:54,403
Two Baker 21,
requesting backup.
215
00:08:56,361 --> 00:08:59,190
He'’s bluffing, Mom! Run for it!
216
00:08:59,234 --> 00:09:00,801
Oh, come on!
217
00:09:00,844 --> 00:09:03,543
A handicapped boyfriend and
a mentally ill daughter?
218
00:09:03,586 --> 00:09:05,022
Have some compassion!
219
00:09:12,464 --> 00:09:14,858
You know what?
I'’m not paying this ticket.
220
00:09:14,902 --> 00:09:16,381
I'’m gonna take it to court.
221
00:09:16,425 --> 00:09:17,992
Good for you.
222
00:09:18,035 --> 00:09:20,603
You have every right
to pretend to be handicapped.
223
00:09:20,647 --> 00:09:22,170
No, you don'’t get it.
224
00:09:22,213 --> 00:09:24,259
This is a First Amendment issue.
225
00:09:24,302 --> 00:09:25,477
Remind me.
226
00:09:25,521 --> 00:09:26,783
You know, First Amendment--
227
00:09:26,827 --> 00:09:28,742
the one that says
I can do whatever I want.
228
00:09:28,785 --> 00:09:30,482
Are you insane?
229
00:09:30,526 --> 00:09:33,485
If I can get a doctor
to so testify, then yes.
230
00:09:33,529 --> 00:09:34,704
[knock on door]
231
00:09:34,748 --> 00:09:36,488
That'’s Adam.
232
00:09:36,532 --> 00:09:38,969
Do not say a word about this.
233
00:09:39,013 --> 00:09:40,754
Really?
You'’re not gonna tell him?
234
00:09:40,797 --> 00:09:42,625
What about your honest
and open relationship
235
00:09:42,669 --> 00:09:44,453
you'’re always bragging about?
236
00:09:44,496 --> 00:09:47,151
That doesn'’t really serve
my interests right now, does it?
237
00:09:49,414 --> 00:09:50,415
Hello!
238
00:09:50,459 --> 00:09:52,243
Hey.
[chuckles] Mmm.
239
00:09:52,287 --> 00:09:53,244
Mmm.
240
00:09:53,288 --> 00:09:54,942
Come on in,
you handsome devil.
241
00:09:54,985 --> 00:09:55,943
Hey, Adam.
242
00:09:55,986 --> 00:09:57,422
Hi, Christy.
243
00:09:57,466 --> 00:09:58,815
So, what'’s the
plan tonight?
244
00:09:58,859 --> 00:10:00,295
We gonna eat here,
go out for a bite?
245
00:10:00,338 --> 00:10:02,166
You pick.
Whatever makes you happy.
246
00:10:02,210 --> 00:10:03,690
Really? Okay.
247
00:10:03,733 --> 00:10:06,431
Um, let'’s order in pizza
and watch some football.
248
00:10:06,475 --> 00:10:07,955
All right,
but only if you promise
249
00:10:07,998 --> 00:10:10,827
to let me ride you
like a pony during halftime.
250
00:10:10,871 --> 00:10:13,569
Uh, uh, Bonnie...
251
00:10:13,613 --> 00:10:17,268
Don'’t worry about me;
I'’m dead inside.
252
00:10:17,312 --> 00:10:20,054
Let me get you a beer
and something to snack on.
253
00:10:22,186 --> 00:10:23,710
Okay, what'’s going on with her?
254
00:10:23,753 --> 00:10:25,494
Excuse me?
255
00:10:25,537 --> 00:10:26,930
The last time she was this nice
256
00:10:26,974 --> 00:10:30,194
was right after she gave me
that... haircut.
257
00:10:30,238 --> 00:10:34,024
Hey, I warned you,
but you were in love.
258
00:10:34,068 --> 00:10:36,679
So what did she do now?
259
00:10:36,723 --> 00:10:39,247
I don'’t think she did anything,
but if you'’re concerned,
260
00:10:39,290 --> 00:10:41,075
maybe you should
press her on it.
261
00:10:42,859 --> 00:10:44,774
What you talking about?
262
00:10:44,818 --> 00:10:47,734
Adam seems to think
something'’s going on with you.
263
00:10:47,777 --> 00:10:49,649
[sighs] Thank you, Christy.
264
00:10:49,692 --> 00:10:52,347
I was gonna wait
till after halftime.
265
00:10:54,262 --> 00:10:55,829
There'’s nothing
going on with me.
266
00:10:55,872 --> 00:10:57,657
Drink your beer.
267
00:10:57,700 --> 00:11:00,181
Sip it slow;
it was very expensive.
268
00:11:03,532 --> 00:11:05,534
All right, what'’s the deal?
269
00:11:05,577 --> 00:11:07,623
If you must know,
270
00:11:07,667 --> 00:11:10,713
when I went to pick up the beer,
I got a ticket-- no biggie.
271
00:11:10,757 --> 00:11:12,410
Oh. Bummer. What for?
272
00:11:12,454 --> 00:11:16,501
Just a parking ticket, you know,
for the way in which I parked.
273
00:11:16,545 --> 00:11:17,851
[snorts]
274
00:11:19,591 --> 00:11:21,768
What'’s [snorts] mean?
275
00:11:21,811 --> 00:11:24,640
Sorry, a lot of blow
went up here.
276
00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:26,207
Still paying the price.
277
00:11:28,557 --> 00:11:30,559
Come on, somebody tell me.
278
00:11:30,602 --> 00:11:32,692
Fine. I-I was in
a little bit of a hurry
279
00:11:32,735 --> 00:11:36,391
to get you your beer,
so I parked in a handicap spot.
280
00:11:36,434 --> 00:11:39,307
Wow. That is not cool.
281
00:11:39,350 --> 00:11:41,178
Agreed. Which is why
I only use it
282
00:11:41,222 --> 00:11:42,919
when I'’m doing something
for you.
283
00:11:42,963 --> 00:11:44,573
Use what?
284
00:11:47,010 --> 00:11:49,273
Uh... Okay. Okay.
285
00:11:55,540 --> 00:11:58,543
You know that I'’m a big fan
of arts and crafts.
286
00:12:01,242 --> 00:12:03,592
Well, a while back,
287
00:12:03,635 --> 00:12:07,596
I got an idea for a project,
which now, in hindsight,
288
00:12:07,639 --> 00:12:11,165
might have been
morally questionable.
289
00:12:11,208 --> 00:12:12,862
Or as the cop said,
"despicable."
290
00:12:15,735 --> 00:12:16,953
Oh, just get to it.
291
00:12:16,997 --> 00:12:19,913
I made a copy
of your handicap parking placard
292
00:12:19,956 --> 00:12:22,872
and laminated it
so it'’d look official.
293
00:12:22,916 --> 00:12:24,700
[laughs]:
I...
294
00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:26,223
You got to be kidding me.
295
00:12:26,267 --> 00:12:28,486
She'’s not. Show him the limp.
296
00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:32,316
What the hell is wrong with you?
297
00:12:33,491 --> 00:12:36,538
Here'’s the problem.
298
00:12:36,581 --> 00:12:38,801
I love...
299
00:12:38,845 --> 00:12:40,585
to laminate things.
300
00:12:41,717 --> 00:12:43,806
Always have.
301
00:12:43,850 --> 00:12:47,331
Registration, Social Security
card, you name it.
302
00:12:47,375 --> 00:12:48,811
Call me crazy,
303
00:12:48,855 --> 00:12:51,292
but once a document
is covered in plastic,
304
00:12:51,335 --> 00:12:53,424
it'’s just better.
305
00:12:53,468 --> 00:12:55,252
This is not a joke, Bonnie.
306
00:12:55,296 --> 00:12:57,515
I don'’t even
use that thing.
307
00:12:57,559 --> 00:12:59,039
It'’s for people
who really need it.
308
00:12:59,082 --> 00:13:00,780
Well, I know that, but...No, no, no.
309
00:13:00,823 --> 00:13:03,130
I-I'’m serious. I'm lucky,
I can still get around,
310
00:13:03,173 --> 00:13:06,524
but there are people
in such bad shape,
311
00:13:06,568 --> 00:13:09,963
going to the store
is their entire day.
312
00:13:11,616 --> 00:13:14,271
That spot changes everything.
313
00:13:14,315 --> 00:13:16,143
I understand.Do you?
314
00:13:16,186 --> 00:13:19,059
Because an able-bodied person
parking in a handicap spot
315
00:13:19,102 --> 00:13:21,801
is kind of the definition
of "don'’t understand."
316
00:13:23,672 --> 00:13:26,240
Christy stole sunglasses!
She just took '’em!
317
00:13:27,415 --> 00:13:28,372
Seriously?
318
00:13:28,416 --> 00:13:30,940
The saleslady
was mean to me!
319
00:13:30,984 --> 00:13:33,638
Oh, my God, who are you people?!
320
00:13:35,553 --> 00:13:36,816
Believe it or not,
321
00:13:36,859 --> 00:13:39,557
better versions
of who we used to be.
322
00:13:39,601 --> 00:13:42,865
Christy, can I talk to your mom
alone for a minute, please?
323
00:13:42,909 --> 00:13:44,780
Yeah, sure.
324
00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:46,521
I'’ve seen what I came to see.
325
00:13:50,699 --> 00:13:52,570
Do we really need to talk?
326
00:13:52,614 --> 00:13:54,834
Because I-I think I get it now.
327
00:13:54,877 --> 00:13:55,965
Sit down.
328
00:13:57,053 --> 00:13:58,054
Not there.
329
00:14:05,583 --> 00:14:07,759
I hope you'’re happy. Adam left.
330
00:14:07,803 --> 00:14:10,458
I'’m sorry. I didn't think
it would go that far.
331
00:14:10,501 --> 00:14:13,853
Says he has grave concerns
about my character.
332
00:14:13,896 --> 00:14:16,333
I haven'’t heard that
since kindergarten.
333
00:14:16,377 --> 00:14:20,772
Well, I'’m sure he'll cool down
and you guys'’ll work it out.
334
00:14:20,816 --> 00:14:22,383
I hope so.
335
00:14:22,426 --> 00:14:23,775
Where you going?
336
00:14:23,819 --> 00:14:25,255
I'’m too upset
to go to sleep.
337
00:14:25,299 --> 00:14:27,257
Good.
338
00:14:27,301 --> 00:14:30,652
You know what, you have
no right to sleep either.
339
00:14:30,695 --> 00:14:32,480
I have confessed
my so-called crime
340
00:14:32,523 --> 00:14:34,569
and have been punished for it,
whereas you don'’t even
341
00:14:34,612 --> 00:14:36,701
have the balls to admit
you did something wrong.
342
00:14:36,745 --> 00:14:38,312
[mockingly]:
"I'’m a good person.
343
00:14:38,355 --> 00:14:41,228
She was mean to me.
I give a penny."
344
00:14:41,271 --> 00:14:42,664
Oh, yeah, how about you?
345
00:14:42,707 --> 00:14:44,840
[mockingly]:
"I love to laminate things,
346
00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:46,798
always have."
347
00:14:58,854 --> 00:14:59,768
[sighs]
348
00:15:04,294 --> 00:15:05,600
[gasps]
349
00:15:11,519 --> 00:15:14,043
Hi. I don'’t know
if you remember me.
350
00:15:14,087 --> 00:15:16,132
I was in yesterday with my mom.
351
00:15:16,176 --> 00:15:18,134
We bought that scarf.
352
00:15:18,178 --> 00:15:19,614
Oh, sure, Walgreens.
353
00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,660
That scarf was a sale item,
354
00:15:22,704 --> 00:15:24,532
so I'’m sorry,
you can'’t return it.
355
00:15:24,575 --> 00:15:26,534
No, I don'’t want to return it.
356
00:15:26,577 --> 00:15:28,579
The reason I'’m here
is because...
357
00:15:28,623 --> 00:15:29,841
[phone rings]
358
00:15:29,885 --> 00:15:32,540
Sugar Magnolia.
Can I help you?
359
00:15:32,583 --> 00:15:35,673
Oh, hello,
Mrs. Crawford.
360
00:15:35,717 --> 00:15:37,371
No, I'’m not busy.
361
00:15:37,414 --> 00:15:40,069
A little busy.
362
00:15:40,113 --> 00:15:42,332
Yeah, your shoes
came in this morning.
363
00:15:42,376 --> 00:15:44,204
Oh, they'’re gorgeous.
364
00:15:44,247 --> 00:15:46,162
Excuse me, you were helping me.
365
00:15:46,206 --> 00:15:48,817
Yes, and now
I'’m helping Mrs. Crawford.
366
00:15:48,860 --> 00:15:51,037
Yes, I'’m here
till 6:00.
367
00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:54,649
In fact, I'’ll pull some
other new items that came in.
368
00:15:54,692 --> 00:15:57,043
Oh, there'’s
an adorable...
369
00:16:02,222 --> 00:16:04,224
Would anyone else like to share?
370
00:16:04,267 --> 00:16:06,530
I'’ll go.
371
00:16:06,574 --> 00:16:08,924
I'’m Marjorie,
and I'’m an alcoholic.
372
00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:10,665
ALL:
Hi, Marjorie.
373
00:16:10,708 --> 00:16:14,974
[sighs] I'’m not feeling very
good about myself right now.
374
00:16:15,017 --> 00:16:18,412
Last night, my husband and I
were supposed to have dinner
375
00:16:18,455 --> 00:16:21,023
with his family, which...
376
00:16:21,067 --> 00:16:23,417
I don'’t know how to describe it.
377
00:16:23,460 --> 00:16:24,896
Uch.
378
00:16:26,811 --> 00:16:29,553
Anyway, just as we
were about to leave,
379
00:16:29,597 --> 00:16:32,339
I told Victor
that I had an AA emergency
380
00:16:32,382 --> 00:16:34,906
and I had to go meet
with one of my sponsees.
381
00:16:36,038 --> 00:16:38,693
So I lied to
my husband.
382
00:16:38,736 --> 00:16:41,000
And yeah, maybe it was
a small, one-time thing,
383
00:16:41,043 --> 00:16:43,524
but, uh, I believe
everything we do
384
00:16:43,567 --> 00:16:47,049
brings us either closer
or further away from a drink.
385
00:16:49,530 --> 00:16:51,749
And this one brought me closer.
386
00:16:51,793 --> 00:16:53,708
So I need to fix it.
387
00:16:57,973 --> 00:17:01,281
You know, I sit here
and listen to your crap!
388
00:17:01,324 --> 00:17:02,673
[mouths]
389
00:17:06,199 --> 00:17:08,679
Sorry I'’m late. I-I couldn't
find a parking spot.
390
00:17:08,723 --> 00:17:11,421
I mean, there was one,
but... not for me.
391
00:17:12,988 --> 00:17:13,989
Doesn'’t matter.
392
00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:17,253
Happy to walk,
grateful to walk.
393
00:17:17,297 --> 00:17:19,908
So, I'’m here.
394
00:17:19,951 --> 00:17:22,824
What couldn'’t you tell me
on the phone?
395
00:17:22,867 --> 00:17:25,957
I wanted to be looking
in your eyes when I say...
396
00:17:26,001 --> 00:17:27,524
Move it along, Bonnie.
397
00:17:29,222 --> 00:17:31,006
I understand
what I did was wrong.
398
00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:32,486
And I'’m not gonna
399
00:17:32,529 --> 00:17:34,575
try to justify it
by telling you I was raised
400
00:17:34,618 --> 00:17:37,534
in the foster system with no one
to teach me the difference
401
00:17:37,578 --> 00:17:40,407
between right and wrong,
or that I ran away
402
00:17:40,450 --> 00:17:42,409
when I was 13,
lived on the streets,
403
00:17:42,452 --> 00:17:44,324
eating only what I could steal,
404
00:17:44,367 --> 00:17:46,630
until I got pregnant
and ended up sleeping in my car.
405
00:17:46,674 --> 00:17:48,589
Well, it wasn'’t my car,
it was acar.
406
00:17:48,632 --> 00:17:49,764
Bonnie,
407
00:17:49,807 --> 00:17:51,896
if you'’re trying to apologize,
408
00:17:51,940 --> 00:17:53,898
just apologize.
409
00:17:53,942 --> 00:17:55,857
Believe it or not, I am trying.
410
00:17:55,900 --> 00:17:58,251
This is the sewage
that comes out.
411
00:18:00,296 --> 00:18:04,822
Probably because of
the many hardships I'’ve faced.
412
00:18:08,696 --> 00:18:10,089
[groans softly]
413
00:18:11,612 --> 00:18:13,918
Yep, me again.
414
00:18:15,529 --> 00:18:17,096
Okay, here it is.
415
00:18:17,139 --> 00:18:19,663
I stole a pair of sunglasses,
expensive ones.
416
00:18:19,707 --> 00:18:23,232
But I feel bad about it,
so I'’m bringing them back.
417
00:18:25,408 --> 00:18:26,888
You stole these?
418
00:18:26,931 --> 00:18:28,368
I did.
419
00:18:28,411 --> 00:18:29,847
And these gloves.
420
00:18:31,545 --> 00:18:34,722
You played a role,
but I take full responsibility.
421
00:18:34,765 --> 00:18:36,071
And I'’m sorry.
422
00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:38,160
Unbelievable.
423
00:18:38,204 --> 00:18:41,207
Yep, not my finest moment.
424
00:18:41,250 --> 00:18:43,687
Moments.
425
00:18:43,731 --> 00:18:45,646
I don'’t know what to say.
426
00:18:45,689 --> 00:18:47,474
I mean, people shoplift
all the time,
427
00:18:47,517 --> 00:18:50,999
but no one'’s actually ever
come back to apologize.
428
00:18:51,042 --> 00:18:53,044
That took a lot of courage.
429
00:18:53,088 --> 00:18:55,917
Well, yeah, it kind of did.
430
00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:58,311
But I'’m trying to live my life
more honestly,
431
00:18:58,354 --> 00:19:00,269
'’cause I don't
want to drink again.
432
00:19:00,313 --> 00:19:01,966
Good for you.
433
00:19:02,010 --> 00:19:03,925
But I still
have to call the police.
434
00:19:03,968 --> 00:19:05,187
Wait, what? No!
435
00:19:05,231 --> 00:19:06,623
I came back here
to make amends and...
436
00:19:07,972 --> 00:19:10,061
Aw, screw it!
Try and catch me!
437
00:19:16,807 --> 00:19:18,461
Just hope you can
forgive me so someday we can
438
00:19:18,505 --> 00:19:22,204
laugh about it, like we do about
that bad haircut I gave you.
439
00:19:22,248 --> 00:19:24,641
That was funny to you?
440
00:19:24,685 --> 00:19:27,296
No, not at all.
441
00:19:28,950 --> 00:19:31,126
Please tell me
how I can make it up to you.
442
00:19:31,170 --> 00:19:32,432
I don'’t know, Bonnie.
443
00:19:32,475 --> 00:19:33,868
There'’s got to be something.
444
00:19:35,261 --> 00:19:37,393
Do you need anything laminated?
445
00:19:37,437 --> 00:19:38,525
[chuckling]
446
00:19:43,443 --> 00:19:45,445
Was that Christy?Yeah. So, we good?
31713
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