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1
00:00:03,438 --> 00:00:06,528
You know, this is the first time
I've ever lived with someone
2
00:00:06,571 --> 00:00:08,747
and enjoyed
taking care of them.
3
00:00:08,791 --> 00:00:10,271
[chuckles]:
What about your daughter?
4
00:00:10,314 --> 00:00:11,489
What about her?
5
00:00:12,534 --> 00:00:14,536
Never mind.
6
00:00:14,579 --> 00:00:16,190
So, you set for the night?
7
00:00:16,233 --> 00:00:18,235
Yep. While you're
at your AA meeting,
8
00:00:18,279 --> 00:00:21,151
I'm gonna sit on that sofa
and get happily drunk.
9
00:00:22,326 --> 00:00:24,111
Alone, like a normal drinker.
10
00:00:24,154 --> 00:00:25,634
Attaboy.
11
00:00:25,677 --> 00:00:27,201
CHRISTY [calls]:
Hi!
12
00:00:27,244 --> 00:00:30,247
Sorry. Traffic was brutal.
13
00:00:30,291 --> 00:00:32,293
We better hurry--
we don't want to see
14
00:00:32,336 --> 00:00:33,685
Marjorie's
disappointed sheep face.
15
00:00:33,729 --> 00:00:36,036
Yeah. That would be...
[bleats]: baaad.
16
00:00:37,559 --> 00:00:39,256
See you later.
17
00:00:39,300 --> 00:00:41,432
Is tonight's meeting an hour
or an hour and a half?
18
00:00:41,476 --> 00:00:42,651
Hour and a half.
19
00:00:42,694 --> 00:00:44,914
Got it.
20
00:00:44,957 --> 00:00:47,482
Are you and the girls going out
for coffee after?
21
00:00:47,525 --> 00:00:48,352
Probably.
22
00:00:50,137 --> 00:00:52,530
Anybody having
any personal problems?
23
00:00:52,574 --> 00:00:55,490
Jill bumped into her ex
with his pregnant fiancée,
24
00:00:55,533 --> 00:00:56,404
Nice.
25
00:01:01,148 --> 00:01:03,237
Don't worry, I'll pace myself.
26
00:01:03,280 --> 00:01:04,847
I know you don't
like having sex
27
00:01:04,890 --> 00:01:06,196
with a drunk guy
after a meeting.
28
00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:09,069
Who said that?
I never said that.You sure?
29
00:01:09,112 --> 00:01:10,679
Yeah. All you have
to do is gargle,
30
00:01:10,722 --> 00:01:12,985
and, you know, function.
31
00:01:13,029 --> 00:01:15,249
Define "function."
32
00:01:16,250 --> 00:01:18,165
Parking is available
in the lot.
33
00:01:18,208 --> 00:01:19,601
Please don't
park in, uh,
34
00:01:19,644 --> 00:01:21,168
any space marked
"reserve."
35
00:01:21,211 --> 00:01:23,257
Uh, there's no
smoking or vaping
36
00:01:23,300 --> 00:01:25,172
anywhere in the
community center.
37
00:01:25,215 --> 00:01:27,217
You can smoke
on South Street, but...
38
00:01:27,261 --> 00:01:28,131
dispose of your
cigarettes...
39
00:01:28,175 --> 00:01:30,090
[bleats]:
Baaa.
40
00:01:31,700 --> 00:01:33,702
You know, we're late
'cause of her.
41
00:01:33,745 --> 00:01:35,878
Oh. Well, then that's okay.
42
00:01:35,921 --> 00:01:37,793
Why is that okay?
43
00:01:37,836 --> 00:01:39,316
Because Christy's
working two jobs,
44
00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:41,231
going to school
and being a mom.
45
00:01:41,275 --> 00:01:42,232
How about what I do?
46
00:01:42,276 --> 00:01:43,625
What do you do?
47
00:01:44,930 --> 00:01:47,194
So glad I
came tonight.
48
00:01:47,237 --> 00:01:49,152
MAN: And now please
help me welcome
49
00:01:49,196 --> 00:01:51,459
tonight's speaker, Jeanine.
50
00:01:57,465 --> 00:01:59,510
Oh, damn.
51
00:01:59,554 --> 00:02:01,730
Hi. I'm Jeanine.
I'm an alcoholic.
52
00:02:01,773 --> 00:02:03,210
OTHERS:
Hi, Jeanine.
53
00:02:03,253 --> 00:02:04,341
[quietly]:
Look, Bonnie!
54
00:02:04,385 --> 00:02:05,734
It's your former lesbian lover!
55
00:02:05,777 --> 00:02:08,345
So, so glad.
56
00:02:09,955 --> 00:02:11,957
♪
57
00:02:26,407 --> 00:02:29,497
I didn't drink in high school.
Actually, I was kind of a nerd.
58
00:02:29,540 --> 00:02:32,239
Mathlete, debate club,
59
00:02:32,282 --> 00:02:35,242
puzzle page editor
for the school paper.
60
00:02:35,285 --> 00:02:37,157
Yes, I could rock a jumble.
61
00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:39,202
[laughter]Thing is,
62
00:02:39,246 --> 00:02:41,335
I knew that
I had feelings for girls.
63
00:02:41,378 --> 00:02:43,380
But I thought
if I got good grades
64
00:02:43,424 --> 00:02:45,600
and stopped watching
Charlie's Angels,
65
00:02:45,643 --> 00:02:46,992
they'd go away.
66
00:02:47,036 --> 00:02:49,212
Then...
67
00:02:49,256 --> 00:02:51,083
I had my first drink
in college--
68
00:02:51,127 --> 00:02:53,956
an entire bottle
of Strawberry Hill.
69
00:02:53,999 --> 00:02:56,437
20 minutes later,
I was making out with a woman.
70
00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:59,179
Ironically, in a closet.
71
00:02:59,222 --> 00:03:01,485
To this day,
72
00:03:01,529 --> 00:03:04,053
the smell of mothballs
gets me hot.
73
00:03:04,096 --> 00:03:07,317
Oh, settle down.
74
00:03:07,361 --> 00:03:08,362
I drank
75
00:03:08,405 --> 00:03:10,320
to be comfortable
with being gay.
76
00:03:10,364 --> 00:03:14,368
And then once I was comfortable,
I just drank.
77
00:03:14,411 --> 00:03:16,718
Every time I thought
I had a drinking problem,
78
00:03:16,761 --> 00:03:20,287
I'd just get a new girlfriend
who was more of a mess than me.
79
00:03:20,330 --> 00:03:22,202
She's talking about you.
80
00:03:24,029 --> 00:03:25,553
I guess my bottom came
81
00:03:25,596 --> 00:03:29,339
when I took in a drunken,
bisexual, pill-head catastrophe
82
00:03:29,383 --> 00:03:31,123
and her adorable
83
00:03:31,167 --> 00:03:32,560
seven-year-old
daughter.
84
00:03:33,517 --> 00:03:34,562
Turn around.
85
00:03:35,606 --> 00:03:37,086
But...
86
00:03:37,129 --> 00:03:39,654
thanks to this program,
we're all sober today
87
00:03:39,697 --> 00:03:41,786
and we can laugh about it.
88
00:03:41,830 --> 00:03:43,484
Right, Bonnie?
89
00:03:45,529 --> 00:03:48,619
Lay down, soldier.
You're dead.
90
00:03:50,404 --> 00:03:52,449
♪
91
00:03:53,755 --> 00:03:56,323
I was so inspired
by your story of how
92
00:03:56,366 --> 00:03:59,543
you dealt with the tragic death
of your wife.
93
00:03:59,587 --> 00:04:02,242
I can identify, because
I just ran into my ex-husband
94
00:04:02,285 --> 00:04:04,505
and his pregnant fiancée.
95
00:04:04,548 --> 00:04:06,942
You're right,
it's exactly the same.
96
00:04:08,422 --> 00:04:11,251
Hi.Thank you for your share.
97
00:04:11,294 --> 00:04:12,513
Oh, you're welcome.
98
00:04:12,556 --> 00:04:14,297
You know,
when I was in high school,
99
00:04:14,341 --> 00:04:15,690
I kissed a guy who's a girl now.
100
00:04:15,733 --> 00:04:19,128
So I know where
you're coming from.
101
00:04:19,171 --> 00:04:20,695
Sista.
102
00:04:20,738 --> 00:04:22,349
[laughs]
103
00:04:23,437 --> 00:04:26,309
Drunken, pill-head catastrophe?
104
00:04:26,353 --> 00:04:30,313
Well, when I saw you sitting
there, I thought I'd nice it up.
105
00:04:30,357 --> 00:04:32,359
Well, if you're gonna tell
that story again,
106
00:04:32,402 --> 00:04:34,709
mention the heroin-- I've got
a reputation to protect.
107
00:04:34,752 --> 00:04:35,971
You got it.
108
00:04:36,014 --> 00:04:38,452
And I'm not bisexual.
I'm just... easy-going.
109
00:04:38,495 --> 00:04:39,931
Whatever you say.
110
00:04:39,975 --> 00:04:41,455
Hi.Hi!
111
00:04:41,498 --> 00:04:43,239
You were wonderful!
112
00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:44,849
Christy Cracker Jack.
113
00:04:44,893 --> 00:04:46,329
This was such a nice surprise!
114
00:04:46,373 --> 00:04:48,157
Honey, it is always
great to see you.
115
00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:49,724
Hey, a bunch of us
go out for coffee
116
00:04:49,767 --> 00:04:51,334
after the meeting--
you want to join?
117
00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:52,640
Is that okay with you, Bon?
118
00:04:52,683 --> 00:04:55,077
Of course.
I'm... easy-going.
119
00:04:56,992 --> 00:04:58,602
Why do you torture her?
120
00:04:58,646 --> 00:05:00,038
It's fun!
121
00:05:01,562 --> 00:05:04,216
♪
122
00:05:04,260 --> 00:05:06,523
So, Jeanine, how long
have you been sober?
123
00:05:06,567 --> 00:05:08,046
28 years.
124
00:05:08,090 --> 00:05:09,352
Wow. Impressive.
125
00:05:09,396 --> 00:05:10,832
Thank you. How about you?
126
00:05:10,875 --> 00:05:12,921
Thirty-four.
127
00:05:12,964 --> 00:05:15,924
Terrific.
You sponsor a lot of people?
128
00:05:15,967 --> 00:05:17,360
Not many.
129
00:05:17,404 --> 00:05:18,753
Twelve.
130
00:05:18,796 --> 00:05:20,450
Nineteen.
131
00:05:21,843 --> 00:05:24,628
Last year, they all chipped
in and sent me to Cabo.
132
00:05:24,672 --> 00:05:28,066
That's nice. I help people
for fun and for free.
133
00:05:28,110 --> 00:05:29,372
JILL:
Ooh...
134
00:05:29,416 --> 00:05:32,027
sponsor cage match.
135
00:05:32,070 --> 00:05:34,638
This is delicious.
136
00:05:34,682 --> 00:05:37,685
I should bring
a piece home for Adam.
137
00:05:39,077 --> 00:05:41,558
Adam? There's a man
in your life?
138
00:05:41,602 --> 00:05:42,777
Oh.
139
00:05:42,820 --> 00:05:45,475
Yes, there is.
140
00:05:45,519 --> 00:05:46,563
Good for you.
141
00:05:46,607 --> 00:05:48,391
It is good for me--
twice a night
142
00:05:48,435 --> 00:05:50,001
and once in the morning.
143
00:05:50,045 --> 00:05:52,395
So you're slowing down
in your old age?
144
00:05:53,918 --> 00:05:55,964
So, Christy, how's college?
145
00:05:56,007 --> 00:05:57,487
Couldn't be better.
146
00:05:57,531 --> 00:06:00,272
I'm taking four classes
and just loving it.
147
00:06:00,316 --> 00:06:01,056
Liar.
148
00:06:01,099 --> 00:06:02,274
What?
149
00:06:02,318 --> 00:06:03,667
You just did
that hair-tuck thing
150
00:06:03,711 --> 00:06:05,582
behind your hair--
that's your tell.
151
00:06:05,626 --> 00:06:06,888
Ever since you were
152
00:06:06,931 --> 00:06:08,411
a little girl,
whenever you tucked your hair
153
00:06:08,455 --> 00:06:09,673
behind your ear,
I knew you were lying.
154
00:06:09,717 --> 00:06:11,414
Really? I do that?Yeah.
155
00:06:11,458 --> 00:06:12,676
You always have.
156
00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:15,070
Is that why I could
never beat you at poker?
157
00:06:15,113 --> 00:06:17,594
Probably more
that you were seven, but yeah.
158
00:06:18,595 --> 00:06:21,424
Actually, I am kind of
struggling at school.
159
00:06:21,468 --> 00:06:23,774
I knew about
the hair-tucking, too.
160
00:06:23,818 --> 00:06:26,168
No, you didn't.
What's going on?
161
00:06:26,211 --> 00:06:28,475
It's just a ton of work.
162
00:06:28,518 --> 00:06:31,303
Plus, I'm pulling in double
shifts at the restaurant.
163
00:06:31,347 --> 00:06:34,350
Every day I go to bed tired
and wake up exhausted.
164
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:37,222
I really did know about
the hair-tucking thing.
165
00:06:37,266 --> 00:06:39,486
How about I put this bee
in your bonnet.
166
00:06:39,529 --> 00:06:41,488
Maybe instead of killing
yourself to become a lawyer,
167
00:06:41,531 --> 00:06:43,533
you can come work with me.
168
00:06:43,577 --> 00:06:45,100
In real estate?
169
00:06:45,143 --> 00:06:48,233
But I've wanted to be a lawyer
since I was a little girl.
170
00:06:48,277 --> 00:06:50,888
No, you haven't. I was there
when you were a little girl,
171
00:06:50,932 --> 00:06:52,499
and you wanted to be Smurfette.
172
00:06:52,542 --> 00:06:55,023
Way to go--
remind her of other dreams
173
00:06:55,066 --> 00:06:57,025
that didn't come true.
174
00:06:57,068 --> 00:06:59,593
Look, in six months you can get
your real estate license
175
00:06:59,636 --> 00:07:01,682
and be pulling in
a lot of money.
176
00:07:01,725 --> 00:07:03,510
And while you're studying
for your license--
177
00:07:03,553 --> 00:07:06,295
which you can do online--
you can come work in my office.
178
00:07:06,338 --> 00:07:07,252
What are you doing?
179
00:07:07,296 --> 00:07:08,776
I'm offering her an opportunity.
180
00:07:08,819 --> 00:07:10,604
Nobody asked you to fix
what isn't broken.
181
00:07:10,647 --> 00:07:12,606
Actually, I'm pretty broken.
182
00:07:12,649 --> 00:07:15,478
You're just trying
to make her into you.
183
00:07:15,522 --> 00:07:17,524
And would that be so wrong?
I mean, come on,
184
00:07:17,567 --> 00:07:19,656
I have a beach house
and a Tesla.
185
00:07:19,700 --> 00:07:21,484
Oh, nice.
I have a beach house, too.
186
00:07:21,528 --> 00:07:24,487
You never told us
you had a beach house.
187
00:07:24,531 --> 00:07:27,708
Uh, no. No, I did not.
188
00:07:30,537 --> 00:07:33,844
Bonnie, I do not understand why
you're so threatened by this.
189
00:07:33,888 --> 00:07:37,065
Yeah? Well, I don't, either.
190
00:07:37,108 --> 00:07:39,589
♪
191
00:07:39,633 --> 00:07:41,635
Just for the record,
I really did know
192
00:07:41,678 --> 00:07:43,506
about the hair-tucking--
I just never told you,
193
00:07:43,550 --> 00:07:45,813
'cause I needed to know
when you were lying.
194
00:07:45,856 --> 00:07:48,293
Hey, Mom...
195
00:07:48,337 --> 00:07:50,295
I love you.
196
00:07:50,339 --> 00:07:52,602
Aw. I love you, too.
197
00:07:52,646 --> 00:07:55,300
And I know you
a lot better than Jeanine.
198
00:07:55,344 --> 00:07:56,693
I know that staying in school
199
00:07:56,737 --> 00:07:58,739
is better than her
stupid real estate nonsense.
200
00:07:58,782 --> 00:08:00,567
I cry every morning
in the shower.
201
00:08:00,610 --> 00:08:02,046
Oh, who doesn't?
202
00:08:03,744 --> 00:08:05,485
[slurring]: Hey, baby.
Did you have fun not drinking?
203
00:08:05,528 --> 00:08:06,790
♪
204
00:08:16,974 --> 00:08:19,237
What are you doing up so early?
205
00:08:19,281 --> 00:08:21,936
I didn't want
to throw up in bed.
206
00:08:21,979 --> 00:08:24,547
Well, aren't you considerate.
207
00:08:25,853 --> 00:08:27,681
I take it you didn't get lucky
last night.
208
00:08:27,724 --> 00:08:29,552
You'd have to ask your mother.
209
00:08:29,596 --> 00:08:32,294
I'm not even sure
why I asked you.
210
00:08:32,337 --> 00:08:34,775
Hey, stud.
211
00:08:34,818 --> 00:08:36,080
That'd be a yes.
212
00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:39,649
Was that you I heard
painting the toilet?
213
00:08:39,693 --> 00:08:41,999
Be nice to him.
It could've been on your back.
214
00:08:43,697 --> 00:08:45,612
Here you go.
215
00:08:45,655 --> 00:08:48,658
Bonnie Plunkett's world-famous
hangover cure.
216
00:08:50,007 --> 00:08:51,618
You complete me.
217
00:08:52,662 --> 00:08:54,011
[doorbell rings][sighs]
218
00:08:54,055 --> 00:08:55,752
Who's that so early?
219
00:08:55,796 --> 00:08:57,754
Jeanine. She's gonna show me
her real estate office.
220
00:08:57,798 --> 00:09:00,757
Who's Jeanine?Nobody. You got drool.
221
00:09:00,801 --> 00:09:01,976
Morning.
222
00:09:02,019 --> 00:09:04,500
Hey, come on in.
Let me get my things.
223
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:06,328
All right.
Hey, Bonnie.
224
00:09:06,371 --> 00:09:07,198
Hey.
225
00:09:07,242 --> 00:09:08,199
Hello.
226
00:09:08,243 --> 00:09:09,287
Hi.Jeanine, Adam.
227
00:09:09,331 --> 00:09:10,332
Adam, Jeanine.
228
00:09:10,375 --> 00:09:11,507
Nice to meet you.
229
00:09:11,551 --> 00:09:13,596
Did you enjoy your pie
last night?
230
00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:16,556
Uh, that's kind of
a personal question.
231
00:09:18,862 --> 00:09:21,212
I brought you
a slice of pie.
232
00:09:21,256 --> 00:09:22,692
Oh. Then yes.
233
00:09:22,736 --> 00:09:24,520
Hmm.
234
00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:27,741
So, how do you guys
all know each other?
235
00:09:29,656 --> 00:09:31,962
We lived with Jeanine
when I was little.
236
00:09:32,006 --> 00:09:34,138
Really? I thought you
said she was nobody.
237
00:09:34,182 --> 00:09:35,705
Drink your beer.
Off you go.
238
00:09:35,749 --> 00:09:38,447
See you later.
Bye.
239
00:09:38,490 --> 00:09:40,884
Please tell me your mother
didn't break his legs
240
00:09:40,928 --> 00:09:43,495
so he wouldn't run away
from her.
241
00:09:48,849 --> 00:09:51,199
And this is the bullpen.
242
00:09:51,242 --> 00:09:54,028
Wow. All these
people work for you?
243
00:09:54,071 --> 00:09:57,118
Yeah. I like to think
of it as a family, but
244
00:09:57,161 --> 00:10:00,382
if they don't kiss my ass,
they're out.
245
00:10:00,425 --> 00:10:01,252
Nice shot, boss.
246
00:10:01,296 --> 00:10:02,776
Thank you.
247
00:10:02,819 --> 00:10:03,994
So what do you think?
248
00:10:04,038 --> 00:10:05,735
You want to be a
real estate agent?
249
00:10:05,779 --> 00:10:08,129
I don't know.
It's pretty tempting.
250
00:10:08,172 --> 00:10:09,652
But?
251
00:10:09,696 --> 00:10:11,132
I'm just afraid
I'd always wonder
252
00:10:11,175 --> 00:10:12,786
what would have happened
if I had become a lawyer.
253
00:10:12,829 --> 00:10:14,265
Hmm.
I'm a lawyer.
254
00:10:14,309 --> 00:10:17,181
Oh, right.
Alissa, Christy.
255
00:10:17,225 --> 00:10:18,139
Hi.
256
00:10:18,182 --> 00:10:20,271
Hi. You're an attorney?
257
00:10:20,315 --> 00:10:21,838
Why are you
selling real estate?
258
00:10:21,882 --> 00:10:24,188
'Cause I want to live indoors.
259
00:10:24,232 --> 00:10:25,799
But you have a law degree.
260
00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:27,801
How come you're not out there
making the big bucks?
261
00:10:27,844 --> 00:10:30,804
Oh, she's adorable.
262
00:10:30,847 --> 00:10:32,675
I know.What? What'd I miss?
263
00:10:32,719 --> 00:10:35,373
Listen, honey, it's a
tough job market out there.
264
00:10:35,417 --> 00:10:38,855
I've got a lawyer, I've
got an MBA, an architect
265
00:10:38,899 --> 00:10:42,772
and a Dominican shortstop who
couldn't hit a curve ball.
266
00:10:42,816 --> 00:10:44,165
I quit law when I realized
267
00:10:44,208 --> 00:10:45,819
I made more money
waiting tables.
268
00:10:45,862 --> 00:10:47,995
Jeanine, she's scaring me.
269
00:10:48,038 --> 00:10:49,823
That's nothing.
270
00:10:49,866 --> 00:10:51,259
Liss, tell Christy
about that time
271
00:10:51,302 --> 00:10:53,304
that you were a public
defender in Oakland,
272
00:10:53,348 --> 00:10:55,785
and that junkie client
stabbed you with a pencil.
273
00:10:55,829 --> 00:10:57,395
It really hurt.
274
00:10:57,439 --> 00:10:59,310
Oh, God.
275
00:10:59,354 --> 00:11:01,965
Thanks, Liss.
Come here. Listen.
276
00:11:02,009 --> 00:11:05,752
Last year, she brought in
200 K in commissions.
277
00:11:05,795 --> 00:11:07,884
"K" as in thousand?
Yes.
278
00:11:07,928 --> 00:11:09,364
Is it too soon
to start kissing your ass?
279
00:11:09,407 --> 00:11:11,671
Never too soon,
Crackerjack.
280
00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:14,935
[sighs]
281
00:11:14,978 --> 00:11:16,588
Can you pass me a wrench?
282
00:11:16,632 --> 00:11:19,330
Crescent? Socket? Vise grip?
283
00:11:19,374 --> 00:11:20,810
The yellow one.
284
00:11:20,854 --> 00:11:22,769
Girls.
285
00:11:22,812 --> 00:11:24,292
Thank you.
286
00:11:24,335 --> 00:11:25,946
FYI, that's a crescent.
287
00:11:25,989 --> 00:11:27,948
FYI, don't care.
288
00:11:27,991 --> 00:11:30,124
Hey, can I ask you
a question?
289
00:11:30,167 --> 00:11:32,300
Sure.
290
00:11:32,343 --> 00:11:33,954
Were you
and Jeanine lesbians?
291
00:11:33,997 --> 00:11:35,651
[loud metallic thud]Oh!
292
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:39,176
[sighs]
293
00:11:39,220 --> 00:11:40,569
Where did that come from?
294
00:11:40,612 --> 00:11:41,918
I don't know.
295
00:11:41,962 --> 00:11:43,920
The minute
she walked into the kitchen,
296
00:11:43,964 --> 00:11:47,402
you started acting all twitchy
like I am around my ex-wife.
297
00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:51,014
Um, well,
298
00:11:51,058 --> 00:11:53,930
I don't know if I'm comfortable
talking about this.
299
00:11:53,974 --> 00:11:56,237
I thought you said we shouldn't
keep secrets from each other.
300
00:11:56,280 --> 00:11:57,891
Hey, if you're gonna hold me
301
00:11:57,934 --> 00:11:59,762
to everything I say,
this is never gonna work.
302
00:11:59,806 --> 00:12:01,242
Oh, come on.
303
00:12:01,285 --> 00:12:03,287
Fine.
304
00:12:03,331 --> 00:12:06,551
Jeanine was gay, still is,
305
00:12:06,595 --> 00:12:08,858
and I...
306
00:12:10,904 --> 00:12:13,558
I don't know
what you'd call it. Uh...
307
00:12:13,602 --> 00:12:15,822
I had sex with her
for two years.
308
00:12:17,606 --> 00:12:19,826
Hmm.
309
00:12:19,869 --> 00:12:21,523
Please don't picture it.
310
00:12:21,566 --> 00:12:24,569
[chuckles]:
Oh, too late.
311
00:12:25,832 --> 00:12:27,964
Is this gonna be an issue?
312
00:12:28,008 --> 00:12:30,271
No, but I do have
some follow-up questions.
313
00:12:30,314 --> 00:12:31,663
Oh, man.
314
00:12:31,707 --> 00:12:33,927
All right, shoot.
315
00:12:35,711 --> 00:12:37,539
You guys really do
that scissor thing?
316
00:12:37,582 --> 00:12:39,846
[metallic thud]
317
00:12:41,935 --> 00:12:44,111
So now I don't know
what the hell to do.
318
00:12:44,154 --> 00:12:46,809
What if I spend thousands of
dollars to finish college,
319
00:12:46,853 --> 00:12:48,593
and then thousands
more on law school,
320
00:12:48,637 --> 00:12:50,726
and then when I get out,
there aren't any jobs?
321
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:51,945
What if there's
a massive earthquake
322
00:12:51,988 --> 00:12:53,903
and the entire state
of California
323
00:12:53,947 --> 00:12:55,949
slides into the ocean?
324
00:12:55,992 --> 00:12:59,256
So, you're saying
don't go into real estate?
325
00:12:59,300 --> 00:13:02,825
No, I'm saying
we don't know the future.
326
00:13:02,869 --> 00:13:05,959
We can only make decisions based
on what's happening right now.
327
00:13:06,002 --> 00:13:07,699
Well, right now,
I'm closing in on 40,
328
00:13:07,743 --> 00:13:09,440
and when I finish law school,
I'll be almost
329
00:13:09,484 --> 00:13:12,400
[whispers]:
45.
330
00:13:12,443 --> 00:13:13,662
Why are you whispering?
331
00:13:13,705 --> 00:13:15,272
'Cause I don't want
anyone else to know.
332
00:13:17,318 --> 00:13:19,363
Oh, honey.
333
00:13:19,407 --> 00:13:22,062
But do I really want
to sell real estate?
334
00:13:22,105 --> 00:13:23,498
Maybe. I don't know.
335
00:13:23,541 --> 00:13:24,934
I do know I'd love
336
00:13:24,978 --> 00:13:27,241
to avoid paying off
student loans until I'm...
337
00:13:27,284 --> 00:13:29,286
[whispers]:
your age.
338
00:13:29,330 --> 00:13:32,594
[sighs]
So you got
a big decision to make.
339
00:13:32,637 --> 00:13:35,379
I know.
What do we think I should do?
340
00:13:35,423 --> 00:13:37,251
I can't make it for you.
341
00:13:37,294 --> 00:13:39,644
Sure you can. Just do it. Do it!
342
00:13:39,688 --> 00:13:42,430
Christy, I can tell you
how to stay sober.
343
00:13:42,473 --> 00:13:44,258
I can't tell you
how to live your life.
344
00:13:44,301 --> 00:13:49,524
Great. So I folded
these stupid chairs for nothing.
345
00:13:49,567 --> 00:13:51,874
I do have one suggestion.
346
00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:53,223
What? I'll take anything.
347
00:13:53,267 --> 00:13:54,877
Pray on it.
348
00:13:54,921 --> 00:13:56,792
Ugh.
349
00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,881
You used to get loaded
every day.
350
00:13:58,925 --> 00:14:00,622
Now you've been sober
for three years.
351
00:14:00,665 --> 00:14:02,798
The same higher power
who makes that possible
352
00:14:02,842 --> 00:14:04,539
can help you through this.
353
00:14:04,582 --> 00:14:07,934
I don't know. I think my higher
power's kind of sick of me.
354
00:14:07,977 --> 00:14:10,893
Sweetie, God didn't
save you from drowning
355
00:14:10,937 --> 00:14:13,417
just so he could kick
your ass on the beach.
356
00:14:13,461 --> 00:14:16,464
You sure? He was pretty tough
on his own kid.
357
00:14:19,989 --> 00:14:21,773
WOMAN [on TV]:
...till he stopped.
358
00:14:21,817 --> 00:14:23,950
MAN:
You stopped them all right.
359
00:14:23,993 --> 00:14:26,213
WOMAN: How else did you think
this was going to...?
360
00:14:26,256 --> 00:14:27,823
[turns TV off]
361
00:14:27,867 --> 00:14:30,217
You were the lady, right?Oh, for God's sake.
362
00:14:30,260 --> 00:14:31,740
Oh, come on!
I want to know.
363
00:14:31,783 --> 00:14:33,220
[sighs]
I guess.
364
00:14:33,263 --> 00:14:35,962
Mostly... we'd switch off.
365
00:14:36,005 --> 00:14:38,312
How'd you decide?
366
00:14:38,355 --> 00:14:40,836
Coin flip, high card,
game of softball?
367
00:14:44,274 --> 00:14:46,407
[sputtering]
368
00:14:46,450 --> 00:14:48,626
You really need
to stop talking.
369
00:14:48,670 --> 00:14:51,847
But... All right, fine.
370
00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:54,241
WOMAN: You're gonna help me
take care of this,
371
00:14:54,284 --> 00:14:56,547
and then we're going
to get rid of his daughter.
372
00:14:56,591 --> 00:14:57,984
And don't worry...
373
00:14:58,027 --> 00:15:01,074
And picturing!
374
00:15:03,380 --> 00:15:06,035
Damn it.
375
00:15:06,079 --> 00:15:08,342
Sorry. Bad start.
376
00:15:11,954 --> 00:15:15,653
God, I really need your help
on this one.
377
00:15:15,697 --> 00:15:17,917
What do I do?
378
00:15:23,139 --> 00:15:25,489
Any time.
379
00:15:26,926 --> 00:15:29,624
What are you doing?
Praying.
380
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,714
Mind if I join you?
381
00:15:32,757 --> 00:15:35,717
Sure. Adam driving you crazy?
382
00:15:35,760 --> 00:15:37,023
Little bit.
383
00:15:37,066 --> 00:15:39,590
All right, let's pray.
384
00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:44,204
[sighs]
385
00:15:46,119 --> 00:15:47,468
[sighs]
386
00:15:47,511 --> 00:15:49,078
You getting anything?
387
00:15:49,122 --> 00:15:51,124
Not with you
yapping in my ear.
388
00:15:51,167 --> 00:15:53,648
Sor-ry.
389
00:15:55,345 --> 00:15:58,696
[sighs]
390
00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:01,308
Should we try Satan?
I hear he gets things done.
391
00:16:07,618 --> 00:16:09,185
She's not with me.
392
00:16:16,540 --> 00:16:20,022
So anyway, I gave it a lot of
thought, I talked to Marjorie...
393
00:16:20,066 --> 00:16:23,286
Marjorie. Hmm.
What she have to say?
394
00:16:23,330 --> 00:16:25,680
She told me I should pray on it.
395
00:16:25,723 --> 00:16:28,726
Okay. Kind of hard
to poke holes in that.
396
00:16:28,770 --> 00:16:30,380
I know. I tried.
397
00:16:30,424 --> 00:16:31,686
So where'd you come out?
398
00:16:31,729 --> 00:16:34,254
I decided to stay in school.
399
00:16:34,297 --> 00:16:36,299
Really? I'm surprised.
400
00:16:36,343 --> 00:16:38,171
Can't explain why.
401
00:16:38,214 --> 00:16:40,260
Just feels like
the right thing to do.
402
00:16:40,303 --> 00:16:43,219
For once in my life,
finish something I started.
403
00:16:43,263 --> 00:16:44,264
You know what?
404
00:16:44,307 --> 00:16:45,743
I'm proud of you.
405
00:16:45,787 --> 00:16:47,049
I thought you'd be mad.
406
00:16:47,093 --> 00:16:48,311
Why would I be mad?
407
00:16:48,355 --> 00:16:49,921
You're sticking
with your dreams,
408
00:16:49,965 --> 00:16:51,532
and you're doing it
the hard way.
409
00:16:51,575 --> 00:16:53,403
Thanks.
410
00:16:53,447 --> 00:16:56,276
That takes guts,
takes character.
411
00:16:56,319 --> 00:16:59,540
You sure didn't grow up
to be your mother.
412
00:16:59,583 --> 00:17:01,063
I'll tell her you said that.
413
00:17:01,107 --> 00:17:02,717
Oh, please do.
414
00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:04,023
[laughs]
415
00:17:06,764 --> 00:17:08,114
I made you a little snack.
416
00:17:08,157 --> 00:17:09,854
Thanks.
417
00:17:09,898 --> 00:17:11,552
That's so thoughtful.
418
00:17:11,595 --> 00:17:14,120
No biggie. I like
doing things for you.
419
00:17:14,163 --> 00:17:16,209
Well, that's
good to know.
420
00:17:16,252 --> 00:17:18,211
What do you
think of her?
421
00:17:18,254 --> 00:17:19,734
Who's this?
422
00:17:19,777 --> 00:17:21,431
Stuntwoman friend
of mine, Rebecca.
423
00:17:21,475 --> 00:17:23,825
Doubles for Angelina
Jolie sometimes.
424
00:17:23,868 --> 00:17:28,351
Okay.She's gay, but she's always
been kind of flirty with me.
425
00:17:31,789 --> 00:17:34,227
What do you think...?
426
00:17:36,620 --> 00:17:39,058
Maybe...
427
00:17:39,101 --> 00:17:42,365
you know, we could
all grab... dinner?
428
00:17:45,064 --> 00:17:47,196
See what happens.
429
00:17:47,240 --> 00:17:50,286
Are you sure
you want to go down that road?
430
00:17:50,330 --> 00:17:52,506
What do you mean?
431
00:17:52,549 --> 00:17:57,380
If she and I hit it off,
what do we need you for?
432
00:17:59,991 --> 00:18:02,124
Let's just watch TV.
433
00:18:02,168 --> 00:18:05,997
No, no. It's my turn now.
434
00:18:06,041 --> 00:18:07,564
You ever dabble
with your sexuality?
435
00:18:07,608 --> 00:18:09,479
Hey. [laughs]
436
00:18:09,523 --> 00:18:12,134
I'm so straight, the word
"dabble" makes me uncomfortable.
437
00:18:12,178 --> 00:18:14,354
So never?
438
00:18:14,397 --> 00:18:16,486
No.
Not once?
No!
439
00:18:18,227 --> 00:18:20,708
Okay, a couple of times in
high school after gym class,
440
00:18:20,751 --> 00:18:24,015
the guys would have sword
fights in the shower.
Really?
441
00:18:24,059 --> 00:18:26,148
No, don't "really" me.
That's just horseplay.
442
00:18:26,192 --> 00:18:27,454
It's roughhousing.
443
00:18:27,497 --> 00:18:29,456
With wet, naked guys
in the shower.
444
00:18:29,499 --> 00:18:31,284
Shut up.
445
00:18:31,327 --> 00:18:34,025
Stop picturing it!
30724
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