All language subtitles for Being.Erica.S04E01.Doctor.Who.1080p.AMZN.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H264-SiGMA_track3_[eng]

- [Josh] Erica.

- Josh.

- Come to Toronto and the
first person I see is you.

- You're you're, you are...

- Older, alive, Satan?

- Here, you're here.

- Yeah, I'm here to finalize my
divorce.

You remember that?

Your sister kicking my ass to
the curb?

- Yeah, I remember you ignoring
her

and taking her for granted.

- Have a nice life.

- Josh, wait a minute, let's,
um.

Let's talk.

- Why?

- If you'd just give me a
minute--

- No, how about not, okay?

And just think, Erica, once
I go through this door,

we'll never have to see each
other again.

- Josh, wait!

Ugh, Josh!

Why?

Out of all the people that
you could have picked to be

my patient, why Josh?

- Why not Josh?

- Well, you know, I could think
of

a million different reasons.

I don't like him, I don't
understand him at all.

- Consider this your opportunity

to understand him better.

- No, but OK, he hates me, too.

He's in the middle of divorcing
my sister,

and there's no way that he's
gonna accept me as his doctor.

- Well, that's good because
you aren't his doctor.

Erica, you are a doctor in
training,

and your first assignment is to
help

Josh move on with his life.

- Move on?

To what, I mean how do I even
do that?

- You figure it out.

- I feel like you're
setting me up to fail.

- Well, "Failure is
nature's plan to prepare you

for great responsibilities."

Napoleon Hill.

And I think that you should
prepare

to fail repeatedly, Erica.

This process is not going to be
easy,

and it's not meant to be.

- Okay, so what do I do?

Do I just go out there, hand
him the card, and ask him how

he's handling the divorce?

- You go out there and
you get on with your day,

and your moment to jump
in and help will arrive.

- How do I know when--

- You'll know.

Trust me.

- OK.

в™Є Ba ba ba ba

в™Є Ba ba ba ba

в™Є It's clearer inside of
me who I will always be

в™Є Open me up to my heart

в™Є Feels like I'm seeing in the
dark

в™Є Waking me up to my life

в™Є To do it all over again and
again

в™Є Until the end

в™Є The sum of my dreams

в™Є And everything I ever wanted
to be.

- Hey, can you be here for six?

I told Sam 6:30.

- Yeah, six is good.

Do you need me to pick up
anything?

- Um, if you could grab some
wine, that would be great.

I've got a million things to
do, including finding my moment

to leap in and help Josh move
on.

- Sounds like it's gonna be the
fun part.

- Yeah, well, you don't know
Josh.

And it doesn't help that my day
is psycho.

I've got back-to-back
interviews all morning,

and then I gotta rush home and
cook.

and I just, I don't even
wanna think about it.

- Then don't.

- Adam?

Hey!

I have to go to work.

- So be late, you're the boss.

- Seriously, seriously, we
can't,

we can't do this right now.

- Seriously?

Why not?

- Because I have very
important things to...

Oh my God.

I mean, I guess I could
be a few minutes late.

[laughing]

Did anyone ever tell you
you're really good at that?

- Which part?

- All of it, the, all of it.

- Yeah, practice makes perfect.

- So, how much practice have
you had?

- Oh, come on, Erica, I was
joking.

- No, I'm serious though, I'm
curious.

How many women have you slept
with?

Okay, I'll make it easy.

More than ten?

- More than ten, are you
serious?

I don't think I know
anyone that hasn't had

more than 10.

- Seven over here.

Okay.

So you've had more than 10.

Have you had more than 20?

More than 30?

More than 40?

You know what, let's just,
we're gonna stop at 40.

- They didn't mean anything.

- Oh, come on.

- No, you know what they say
about how

it's different when you...

- When you?

- When you love someone.

I've never loved anyone before.

Before now.

- And I've highlighted the
essential points of agreement.

If you're both amenable,
we'll use this as a basis

for preparing a formal
settlement.

- Signed.

- Well, my issues about debt
division,

are they included here?

And the London condo?

- Page six.

- Wow.

I wish you were this easygoing
when we were married.

- [Solicitor] Josh.

- No, it's cool.

Anyone got a pen?

So that was easier than
I thought it would be.

- Yeah, I just wanna move
on so that both of us

can be happy.

- No, no, so that you
can be happy, you mean.

Don't, don't speak for me.

- I wasn't speaking for you.

I was, I was being sincere.

- Then you should've thought
twice before

asking for a divorce.

- OK.

Bye, Josh.

- That's right, storm off in a
huff.

That's more like the Sam I know.

- Just get in the car, Sam.

Don't let him bring you down to
his level.

- So what, that's how it is?

Am I even worthy of a response?

- Come on, man, just take it
easy.

- What, you're too full of
joy, and light, and peace.

- Hey, back off!

You hear me?

- Yeah.

- To answer your question,
I am happy, Josh.

For the first time in years, I
am happy.

And if you want to be mean and
miserable,

that's your choice.

- [Lenin] Get outta my way.

- Just drive.

- [Erica] So tell us why
you'd make a great assistant

here at 50/50.

- Well, I'm a professional
typist, and a huge fan

of Sweet Dreams Kitty.

I read it to my cats every
night.

Oh, and I loved Broken Dreams
of Gold.

- Broken Dreams of Gold?

- The first book I edited,
don't ask.

- Oh, it's Sloan Scott.

You work out at my gym, do you
do Zumba?

- Oh my God, I heart Zumba!

It's like I'm getting a
workout and a night out

at the same time!

- Oh my God!

I totally agree.

Do you have Julio as your
instructor?

- Uh, Julio-else do you think?

[laughing]

- You're cute.

- Uh, Sloan, it's just I
see here that you don't have

any actual experience as an
assistant.

- What do you mean?

Oh.

- And, when I was doing
my masters in English lit,

I spent summers working at
a small press in Ottawa.

Secretarial work, but they
also had me doing coverage

on the missions.

- Coverage, really?

- Well, yeah.

First time in my life
I actually felt cool.

- I bet.

So, Rachel, uh, tell me what
you--

- My spare time?

Well, I do lots of things.

I write a blog.

I'm into guerrilla gardening.

Seed bombs, you know?

- How did you do that?

I mean, how did you answer a
question that hadn't asked yet?

- You asked what I do in my
spare time.

- No, I was gonna ask you what
you do in your spare time,

but then you cut me off.

- OK.

This might sound weird but,

I'm a little bit psychic.

But it gets worse when I'm
nervous,

and since this is an interview
situation--

- I'm sorry, what?

- Shh.

- The more nervous I get,
the more psychic I am.

I have no control over it.

You know, it's like some
people sweat, I get psychic.

- Okay, please tell me we don't
have to

do this again tomorrow.

- Well, we won't have
to if we pick someone

from today, OK?

- I mean, it's pretty obvious
who.

- Yeah, Rachel.
- Sloan.

- Sloan?

Julianne, she has zero
experience.

- I know, but she does Zumba.

And I got a very good vibe from
her

and not a creepy "I'm a
psychic" vibe, like Rachel.

- Rachel has actual experience.

And so what if she's quirky?

I mean, she seems smart.

- She did a chair dance.

And she's keen, and she's
got great references.

- She's a freak.

- Okay.

We will Just call more people
and set up more interviews.

- Oh no.

No, it's fine.

We'll hire the weirdo
psychic with experience.

- Yes!

- But a voice from beyond is
telling me not to be surprised

if it doesn't work out.

- Julianne, it's fine.

I'm calling her right now.

- Ugh.

- Then Josh follows me outside.

Lenin's waiting for me.

- I wasn't planning on being
there, but I'm glad I was.

- My knight in shining armor.

- Good man.

- Anyway, the kicker?

I got home and there's an
email from Josh's lawyer

with even more demands.

- No, no, no, wait, I
thought that he signed?

- There was a rescission
period and he changed his mind.

- He's doing everything
he can to make you hurt.

It's, it's petty.

- Anyone want some more wine,
Sammy?

- I'm good with water, thanks.

But I will have a cupcake.

- Yeah, sure.

Cupcakes with sprinkles, coming
right up.

- Thank you.

Guys, I just, I can't believe
I wasted so many years

with that selfish bastard.

Nobody liked him, you hated him.

- Well, I mean, I didn't hate
him.

- Oh, come on, you did.

And I was so protective
of him for so long,

and now it makes no sense to me.

Why did I love him?

How could I have loved someone
like that?

Anyway, it's fine.

If he wants a war, I will give
him one.

- All right, I know you're
upset honey.

Me, too, but we need to just
chill on the Josh thing.

Dude's got issues.

- Yeah, Lenin's right.

- Are you seriously
suggesting that I should feel

sorry for him?

- No, but I do think you
need to be the bigger person.

Rise above all this.

Show him some, some maturity.

- I've tried.

No matter what I do he keeps
coming after me, and look,

there comes a point when you
have to say enough is enough

and fight back.

- [Josh] Erica.

- Josh, hi.

- If Sam's got something to say
to me,

she should say it through her
lawyer.

- Look, Josh, I know this might
be weird,

but honestly, I'm not here to
attack you.

I'm I'm here to help.

- Right, okay, goodbye, Erica.

- No, just, Josh, Josh wait.

- Look, if Sam wants to
move on with her life

with some Rasta dude?

Good for her.

But me, I'm just thinking
things through.

- You're torturing her on
purpose.

- I'm glad to hear it's working.

- I'm not, I'm not, I'm not.

I, I hate that guy!

I, I hate him and I want to
punch in his smug little face!

[screaming]

- Erica.

Okay.

Why don't you, why don't
you just relax, okay,

and come and sit, please.

There you go.

Better?

- No, you know what, not really.

And I can't do this, I
don't know how to do this.

- One step at a time.

Okay?

Let's start with where you're
at.

- Well, I--

- You hate Josh, I understand
that.

So why don't you tell me when
that started, the hatred.

- Spring break 1998.

We were supposed to spend the
week

at my Grandmother's condo in
Lauderdale.

It was supposed to be me and
Sam.

Sam wound up inviting
Josh, so I invited Jenny.

But then, before we even
got on the airplane,

Sam got food poisoning and
she barfed all over the,

- [Dr. Tom] The conveyor belt?

- And our carry-on luggage,
and Jenny's brand new

kitten heel sandals.

- Yeah, okay.

- Anyway, instead of
Josh staying in Toronto

to take care of Sam, he flew
down with us.

We were just stuck with him.

And yes, okay, we could've
been more mature about it,

but Josh went insane.

He was constantly wasted and
wound up naked in the pool.

And the condo board, they
almost kicked my Bubbe out.

And so, by the time Sam finally
arrived--

- Yeah, yeah, you hated him.

- Wow.

Before that trip, you know,
I always thought that,

Josh, he was mildly annoying
but mainly harmless.

After that trip?

Oh, I saw him for what he
really is.

You know, he's rude and
crude and hugely insincere,

On top of being--

- [Dr. Tom] Erica?

- What?

- I get the picture.

Here's the thing though.

Each patient is chosen
for a specific reason.

They have something to teach
you, and you have a way

to help them.

However, neither of these
things can happen without first

establishing a connection.

You have to build a connection
with Josh, all right?

Otherwise, why would he
trust you enough to open up?

- How?

I mean, we have nothing in
common.

- Well, which brings us to
lesson one.

You are your patient.

- What the hell does that mean?

- Well, let's not get ahead of
ourselves.

First, build a bridge with
Josh, connect.

So that you can do your
job and help him move on

with his life.

- Whoa!

Sorry.

Sorry.

- What is with the Strange
sisters today?

I mean, come on, Sam, let's go.

- Jenny, hand me that bin now!

- What, why?

- Look, if you like your
brand new shoes you will

hand me that bin.

- Oh my God.

- It's okay, Sam.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Check it, I got this humongous
bottle of liquid gold

for 18 bucks.

- Josh, that's that's great,
but look,

Sam is sick and I don't
think she's gonna be able

to make the flight.

- Yes, you can.

It's up and down, three hours.

- Sam, you have food
poisoning and you can't fly

if you're throwing up.

So, look, here's what we'll do.

You're gonna go home and
get some rest and, Josh,

you you can come with us.

- What, Erica.

- Yeah, and Sam, you can fly
down in a couple of days,

when you're feeling better.

- She'd have to get a whole new
flight.

- It's just, you know,
it's just rebooking fees,

it's no biggie.

So we settled?

[festive music]

- So what, I'm supposed to
like accept that you invited

this asshole along to ruin our
vacation?

- Well, look, this asshole,
he's probably gonna marry

Sam one day, which will
make him my brother-in-law.

So I need to build a
relationship with him,

and that is exactly what I'm
gonna be doing on this trip.

- Okay.

You called him a cheesy,
annoying loser and made fun

of his Duran Duran tattoo to
his face.

- When did I do that?

- Yesterday.

Good luck building that
relationship.

- You girls coming or what?

I'm hitting the pool,
I gotta get my rays on.

- [Jenny] Hey, Mr. Anderson.

- This place is full of old
people.

Oh, hey, ladies.

- No, no, no, no. This is
not what I signed up for.

- Jenny, I told you this
is my bubbe's condo.

- Okay, but it looks like a
scene from

The Golden Girls.

- Wait till I bust out the
whiskey.

Then it'll be Golden Girls Gone
Wild!

- Ew.

- You guys, look, it's free
and it's a 10 minute walk

to the beach, so quit your
whining.

[gasping]

- What?

- Hello, can we say gorgeous?

Okay, if Ricky Martin turns
out to be gay or married?

We're checking out of bubbe-land
and into the Lago Mar,

all right?

- Go get him, tiger.

All right, let's, let's get our
rays on.

- Are those two cool?

Hey!
- No, actually,

let's just, let's sit
somewhere else, okay?

- Why?

- Because "Call me Barry"
Rosenfeld over there,

he's a little bit of a letch.

Let's go over here.

- Do you mind if me and my
friend join you

for a little fun in the sun?

- Hi, Mr. Rosenfeld.

- Erica.

- [Erica] Oh!

- I tell you this every
time, call me Barry.

Here, please.

- [Erica] Okay.

- So, Erica, is this your
boyfriend?

- Yes, it is.

- No, we're just friends, the
name's Josh.

- [Barry] Nice to meet you,
Josh.

- Can I let you in on
a little secret, Barry?

- Sure.

- My friend Erica loves older
men.

She likes a man who can
teach her things like Mahjong

and a Merengue.

A man of refinement, a man of
distinction.

- My first wife?

20 years younger than me.

That's what I love about this
modern world, anything goes.

- I need some water.

- Come on, Erica, don't be mad.

- Don't be mad?

Why do you act like this?

- I was just trying to have
some fun.

- At my expense.

- Seriously, Erica, I
only did that for a laugh.

I'm not trying to be mean.

- [Jenny] Oh my God!

- Hey!

- So Jesus, AKA the hottest
pool boy slash graffiti artist

ever has just invited us to Las
Olas,

Lauderdale party central.

It's gonna be off the
H-double-OK!

- Um.

I don't know, Josh, do you
have any big plans tonight?

- No.

- Erica, Jesus invited us.

- No, that's cool, you guys go.

- Okay.

- No, look you know what?

I'll go if Josh goes.

Just go ask Jesus if we can
have one more.

It's not a big deal.

Come on!

- Okay.

Sure.

[upbeat music]

- Well, she doesn't waste any
time.

Wow, I think I just threw
up in my mouth a little bit.

- Mmm!

Oh, Jenny It's just, it's
always the same story.

Not the fun night out you
were hoping for, I bet.

- No, no, I'm glad Jenny and
Rico Suave

are making a love connection.

It's entertaining.

Thanks for inviting me, by the
way.

- No, I wanted to.

Uh, so, what should we talk
about?

- I don't know.

- All right, how 'bout
this, how 'bout this?

We ask each other a question,
and it can be anything,

but you have to answer it.

Come on, it'll be fun, it'll be
fun.

I'll start.

Uh, what's with the tattoo on
your arm?

- Come on, like I liked Duran
Duran.

The Union of the Snake was like
my anthem.

So one drunk night, I got
a little carried away.

- Okay, now it's your turn.

Ask me question, it can be
anything.

Bring it.

- Why haven't you had a real
boyfriend since high school?

- Wow.

Way to just start at full speed.

Um.

I don't know, I guess I had, or
I have,

a tendency to pick guys apart,
unfairly.

And maybe deep down I don't
know what I want, or didn't.

What?

- It's your turn to ask.

- No, no, no.

What were you just thinking?

That is my next question.

- I can't tell you all my
secrets.

- Actually, I just, I just
have to go to the bathroom,

but you are not off the hook,
mister.

Wow, you really don't do
subtle, do you?

"Life is too short to blend in."

Paris Hilton.

So you seem to be making some
headway.

- Yeah.

Who knew, It's been pretty
eye-opening.

You know, back in 1998, Josh,
he was just,

he was a lot less bitter, a lot
more open,

and actually sorta funny.

- You sound surprised.

- Not so much, you know.

I mean, if the point is for me
to realize

that Josh he's an actual
person, you know,

he's not just the devil.

So I need to stop judging
him and stop focusing

on his bad qualities and
start looking towards

his good qualities.

- Oh, and the trophy for
the most obvious realization

of the evening goes to Erica
Strange.

- What?

That's not it?

Okay, look, I don't
understand, because you told me

to build a bridge and
that's what I've done.

And what on Earth is this for?

- Ammunition.

[speaking in foreign language]

- Oh my God, of course,
Jesus has a girlfriend.

- Gloria Estefan here comes out
of nowhere

and starts shrieking at Jenny.

[speaking in foreign language]

[screaming and shouting]

- You guys, just chill out!

- Ha, ole!

- Jenny!
- What?

Yeah.

[speaking in foreign language]

- Yeah, no, okay, Jenny.

Just, you know, just do whatever
it is that you wanna do.

Okay.

See you tomorrow.

Well, Jenny is going to
spend the night with Jesus.

- Well, I hope he has a
deadbolt.

[chuckling]

- Oh.

You know, Josh, I'm
really glad that we got

to hang out tonight.

Seriously, it's...

- Yeah, me too.

- I wish we'd done it sooner.

- Stop before you're
gonna start telling me

my eyes look like the ocean.

- Oh my gosh.

[yawning]

I am exhausted and I drank
too much, so good night.

- No, no, no, it's not even
midnight.

Your bubbe's got VH1.

We can stay up and watch pop-up
video.

- Sorry, I'm too tired.

But hey, you know what?

You should get some sleep
too and we can do this

all over again tomorrow.

Good night.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, what the?

What the hell was that?

That was not an invitation.

What the hell is wrong with you?

[soft music]

Oh my god, you scared me.

- Ugh, shh!

Keep your voice down,
this hangover's brutal.

- Hey, listen, did you, did
you see josh on your way up?

- Yeah, i did. He was at the
pool.

- And did he, did he say
anything or?

- How about, uh, hey,
Jenny, how was your fabulous

night with Jesus?

How 'bout that?

- Jenny.
- Erica, honestly?

Your obsession with Josh is
whacked.

And if I didn't know you,
I would think you were

in love with him.

- Oh wow.

Oh God.

He kissed me.

- What?
- Yeah, last night.

You know, I just thought
we were having this nice,

relaxed conversation and he
took it as an invitation.

- Ew, ew, what a sneaky creep!

He's dating your sister.

I mean, you should get on
the phone to Sam right now.

- No, look, I'm not I'm not
doing that.

Josh, he just I mean,
he just made a mistake.

And he has no sense of
boundaries

And he needs to be
confronted and just told

that it's not okay and--

- Erica, no, no, you're being
way too forgiving, okay?

Josh is a creep, end of story.

- Well I mean, that's a little
simplistic.

- You know what, nevermind.

That's fine, go talk
to him, Mother Theresa,

and go prove me right.

- Jenny, why--

[rock music blaring from
headphones]

[water splashing]

- Hey!

- Hey we need to talk.

- Can't hear you.

[rock music blaring from
headphones]

- Listen, Josh, I'm, uh...

I'm willing to give you the
benefit of the doubt here.

- Listen, Erica, beer
goggles, shit happens.

There's nothing to talk about.

- Listen, Josh, you're dating
my sister

and shit doesn't just happen.

What you did was wrong and
I need to understand you.

How could you do something like
that?

- You came on to me.

- Josh.

- With the questions and the
hugs,

and "oh, Josh, wish
we'd done this sooner."

- I was just being friendly.

- No, more like you were
drunk and horny and now

you're trying to blame me.

Okay, but you're the slut
who tried to get it on

with her sister's boyfriend.

If you don't back off,
that's what I'll tell Sam.

And who do you think
she's gonna believe, huh?

Me, that's who.

And I'll make sure she hates
you forever.

- Uh, I can't work with him.

I can't work with that guy.

I can't, I tried, I took a risk,

I tried to connect with
him, but it's just,

it's the same crap.

- Nevertheless, Josh is your
patient.

- He is toxic, right to
the core, just toxic.

- So, what're you trying to say?

- I think that it's time for me
to move on

to a new patient.

- And that's what you want?

- Yeah, that's what I want.

- Then it's done.

- Okay.

Phew.

- Hey, that was fast.

- Not really.

I just spent the last two
days in Florida and I'm wiped.

- In Florida, eh?

Cavorting with movie stars
on South Beach, were ya?

- No, no, no.

This is 1998, fort Lauderdale.

Old people and Speedos do not
mix.

- Ouch.
- Yeah.

- So how was your first case?

- Pretty bad since I quit.

I mean, not training, just
just being his doctor.

- You quit?

- Yeah, you know what, it just,
you know,

it wasn't gonna work out.

- After one session, of
course it wasn't gonna

work out right away.

- No, at all.

I mean, you said it yourself.

Josh, he is messed up.

- You think me and Dr. Tom hit
it off

when I first started therapy?

I battled him every step of the
way,

and I was no cocky
investment banker like Josh.

I broke bones for a living.

Did Dr. Tom give up on me?

- No, but you know what,
it's just, it's not the same.

- Yeah, it is.

You're a doctor now.

- In training.

- In training, who just quit
on her very first patient.

- Ah, dammit!

Ugh, it's just it's really hard
and--

- And I have no idea what it's
like, so I shouldn't comment.

- No, hey, that's look, that is
that's not

what I meant at all.

- All I can say is don't give
up.

Dr. Tom gave you Josh for a
reason.

- Mm.

- Anyway, I should get going.

I've got an early start
tomorrow.

I'll come by tomorrow night,
okay?

- Okay.

Thank you.

- You're welcome.

Good night.
- Good night.

Oh, okay.

[soft music]

- Have a seat.

- I wanna try again.

- Okay.

Well, then I think that we
should start at the beginning.

- Okay.

- You are your patient.

- See, that's the problem, Dr.
Tom,

because I don't understand
what that means.

Because I'm not at all.

I'm nothing like him.

- You know you say that
repeatedly, right?

- I would never act the
way that he does, ever.

Every time I try to reach
out and connect with him,

every time I open myself up to
him,

he either shuts down or attacks
me.

- And you would never
do something like that?

shut someone down when
they're opening up to you.

- No, of course I wouldn't.

- Really?

So you are totally innocent
when it comes to Josh?

- Uh, where are we?

- Well, you're over there with
Josh.

- This is the night of the
blackout.

What're we doing here?

- Well, this was an important
night for you and Josh.

It was the first time
that he opened up to you

and let you know how he felt.

Watch and listen to your
reaction.

- [Josh] You know how I met Sam?

Grade nine, I switched lockers
so I could to meet her.

- [Erica] Why?

- Strategy, 'cause I was
I liked this other girl

that she was with and she
and Sam were really close.

- Okay, so you used her.

- Yup, to get to the girl I
liked.

But just it didn't work.

You know, and she's a great
girl.

My parents liked her, my
friends liked her, I liked her.

I just didn't love her.

- What?

- And Sam could sense it.

She can tell my heart's not in
it.

See, that's the thing.

From the beginning, my
heart has always wanted...

- Don't.

- Erica,

- No, okay?

No, just stop talking, I
don't want to hear it, okay?

I gotta go find Sam and uh...

Shit.

You do not tell Sam ever.

- I won't.
- Ever!

- I won't.

[soft music]

[sobbing]

- Josh exposes himself to
you, he shares his feelings,

is vulnerable in a way
that's excruciating, and you?

You shut him down.

You shut him up.

- I never meant to hurt him.

I didn't and I certainly
didn't do it on purpose.

And when Josh hurts people,
he does it on purpose.

- And that's the distinction,
is it?

Really, that Josh, he
does it, it's on purpose,

but when you do it by accident,
right?

- Yes.

- In Florida, when he kissed
you--

- No, that was completely
different,

and he deserved to be told off.

He was dating my sister.

- Erica, I think you're missing
the point.

- Which is?

- Which is you place Josh down
here

and you place yourself up here,

and you say, that is not me.

I could never be like that.

You know, that person is other
is undeserving a monster.

It's an old story, it's how
wars begin,

it's how people turn on each
other.

And, you know, it starts so
simply too.

I am not you.

I am nothing like you.

And it is, each time, a lie.

Because underneath all the
layers of,

of fear and the protection,
we are, at our core, the same.

We have the same needs, and
we carry with us the same

capacity for good and evil.

[soft music]

- You are your patient.

- You are your patient.

You are every patient you will
ever have

and every person you will ever
meet.

And until you acknowledge
that you have the capacity

not just for kindness and
compassion, but also for

heartlessness and cruelty,
until you acknowledge that,

you will never be able to start
from here.

You'll never be able to help
Josh.

- Yeah.

- I expect the final round
of bids at 5:00 on Friday,

otherwise you're out of the
process, okay?

[rapping at the door]

- Hi again.

- Erica, I told you last night,
tell Sam to get her lawyer.

- Look, Josh, I'm not here
about Sam.

I'm here, to talk about us.

- I got a lot of work to do,
so...

- I'll make this quick.

I'm just having trouble
figuring out where to start.

It was hard enough to
make myself come here.

- Look, I don't know what this
is about.

- This is about the fact that,
for a long time, Josh, I,

I thought I was better than you.

That's how I acted, that's how
I treated you, and I'm sorry.

- [Josh] You came all the
way here to tell me that

you're sorry that you thought
you were better than me?

- I came here to tell you
that I'm sorry for the times

that I hurt you.

- Yeah, you hurt me, Erica.

I cried myself to sleep every
night.

Jesus.

You wanna make things right?

Then spare me the big drama,
okay?

'Cause drama's the last
thing I need right now.

So I think you should leave.

- Um.

- Fine, you can watch me work.

And once you get bored enough,
you can let yourself out.

- I treated you the way that
I treated you because I wanted

to put distance between us.

Because I couldn't deal with
you,

with the way with what I felt
from you.

Because I always felt it,
Josh, even before you told me.

- Why are you bringing this up?

- Because this thing between us

that we can't talk about,
that we've never talked about?

It's affected our entire
relationship.

- I'm divorcing Sam, not you,
Erica, okay?

So you don't have to worry
about our relationship.

- When you kissed me in Florida,

- Erica!

- I couldn't deal with your
emotions.

I didn't want to, so instead,
I treated you like a monster.

But you're not, you were
just you were trapped inside

of something that you
couldn't find your way out of,

and I know what that is like
because

I spent years trapped inside my
own life.

- What do you want me to say?

- Whatever you want to say.

- I don't want to say anything
to you.

Fine.

It was awful, okay?

It sucked.

I was the loser creep who
wanted his sister-in-law.

Does that make you feel better?

- No.

- I dunno.

- Does it make you feel
better to know that

I have felt like a loser
ever since high school?

- I find that hard to believe.

- Really, I couldn't
sustain a relationship,

I couldn't figure out a career.

I spent years feeling like there
was something wrong with me

and like it would never get
better

and I would never be happy
and I am not pretending

to know what it's like to be
you, Josh.

But I see things differently
now.

I see you differently now.

And there are a lot of ways
in which we're sorta similar.

в™Є When I lay down tonight

- Anyway, thank you for hearing
me out.

в™Є I come with open arms

- Erica?

- Yeah?

- Do you, still feel trapped?

- No.

- What changed?

- I did.

I spent years holding onto
regrets and wishing that

I would've done things
differently
and once I let that go,

things got a lot better.

в™Є Let the burdens all slip

в™Є I will loosen my tight grip

в™Є Give me peace, love and
happiness.

- [Erica] Have you ever
felt at home in a crowd?

Like you were part of something
bigger

and you felt this amazing
energy that happens

when people come together?

How, despite the superficial
differences,

you know that deep down
we're all the same?

We have the same secret needs
and the same wild dreams.

We walk around thinking our
secret pain,

our secret joy is so unique,
when really,

we all just want the
same things, to be happy,

to be safe, to be loved.

в™Є No struggling just
me just now still here

в™Є In the back of night

в™Є Ain't nobody speak just keep
it silent

в™Є No sound just my body crying

в™Є When I lay down.

в™Є Ba ba ba ba

в™Є Ba ba ba ba

[wordless vocalizing]