All language subtitles for (2008) - S03E04 - Adele Week One (1080p HMAX WEB-DL x265 Silence)

Yeah well, I--
I'll leave it to you, Wendy.

No, why-- why-- why don't you
just buy the tickets

and I'll-- I'll be there?

That sounds...
that sounds fine.

-Yeah?
-Yeah, all right.

That sounds fine too.
Uh, it's a bit-- bit asinine.

No, no. No, no, Wendy.
Go-- go ahead.

I love asinine.

Okay. Yeah. Cobble Hill.
6:50 p.m.

No, let's-- let's meet there,
okay?

I just want to drop
some things off at my place.

-And I'm stopping by the market

right now.

Soy milk. Okay.

All right.

Okay. I-- I--
I've gotta run, Wendy.

Okay. Organic. I got it.
I'll talk to you later.

Sorry.
I didn't hear you come in.

Hi, I'm Adele Brouse.

-Paul Weston.
-Please come inside.

Thank you.

Wow.

It's, um... it's very bright
in here.

My, uh, my office is dark.

More burrow-like.

-Should I lower the shades?
-No, no, no, no. They're fine.

I should practice casting off
my mole-ish ways.

The sun is probably...

It's probably good for me.
They...

they say it helps with sleep.

That would be something,
wouldn't it? Just--

If that's all it took?
A healthy dose of sunlight

so I could just go outside
and...

...I wouldn't need
to be here.

-You'd rather not be here.
-Very astute.

The truth is,
I don't really mind.

As long as I leave with--
with what I came for.

You said on the phone
you're in need of a refill

-of your Ambien prescription?
-Yeah, that's correct.

And I-- I'll take that to go,
please.

I think I-- I explained
that my sleep

has been difficult.

My doctor in Baltimore
was renewing the prescription

long-distance,
but now he's decided to stop.

So, he wanted me
to find somebody local.

So... you're
in the neighborhood...

and you had an open appointment
so...

I see.

How long have you
been taking Ambien?

About five years.
On and-- on and off.

Nightly?

Well, nightly for the past year.
Maybe, I-- I don't know,

fourteen-- fourteen months?

-One year or 14 months?
-Four-- fourteen months.

-How many milligrams?
-Ten.

The doctor in Baltimore
was your therapist?

My physician.

-Your primary care physician?
-Yes, my primary care physician.

Yeah.

And you're new to New York?
How long have you been here?

Two years.
Two years and one month

since you seem
to like being precise.

And precisely three nights ago,
I ran out of Ambien.

Sorry.

I-- I haven't slept since--
since Tuesday.

It can be difficult
to stop abruptly.

Yeah, believe me,
I'm-- I'm aware of that.

Well, I never would have stopped

if-- if I hadn't run out
of pills.

I started to take another half
during the middle of the night.

-Half of?
-Half a pill.

That would be half of ten
and which is five.

Got it.

So early in the week I noticed
the bottle was empty.

I have an appointment
with my neurologist

first thing Monday morning.
And I said,

"Okay, well,
I'll suffer through it

and then get him
to fill the prescription."

But once it became clear
that I couldn't do that,

I called, um, Alan Burdick
and, um, he referred me to you.

-I'm in the neighborhood.
-Right.

I have to say though,
I-- I didn't expect you to be...

to be so young.

So you wake up after a few hours
and--

Yeah, I-- I wake up
after a few hours,

and, uh, I can't get back
to sleep.

So I-- I-- I take another pill,

when I have another pill
to take.

How do you know Alan Burdick?

Oh, we-- we went
to college together.

Georgetown.
We're-- we're friendly.

We've maintained contact
with each other.

-He's an excellent doctor.
-Yes, he is,

and he said the same about you.

Though, how he knows that I, uh,
I don't know.

Because you can't have been
practicing for what?

Two, three years at the most?

That's the second time
you've mentioned

how young you think I am.

Does my age bother you?

No.

The truth is, what--
whatever grade you're in,

I'm sure you've learned
to write by now.

So if you're able
to fill out a prescription,

then your age doesn't bother me
at all.

Look, I should have been
more clear with you when--

when I called yesterday.

I've actually been in treatment
for the last 20 years

on and off and I'm--

I really didn't come today
to continue that process.

-I understand that.
-Okay.

Though I-- I can't just dispense
medication without--

Yes, I understand.
You've got your job to do.

Look, if you wanna ask me
some questions, just,

fine, go-- go ahead.

Then you can send me on my way.

With whom were you in treatment?

Gina Toll...

from the Washington-Baltimore
Psychoanalytic Institute.

I'm not familiar with her.

Well, she was my teacher
at the Institute.

She's one of the best analysts
around.

She was my supervisor
for many years

and then she was my analyst.

She saw my ex-wife with me
for-- for quite a while.

-Together?
-Yes, together.

-Sounds pretty all-encompassing.
-Yeah.

And you're
a practicing psychoanalyst?

Yes.

Okay.

Why don't you tell me exactly
what's been going on

-with your sleep?
-Uh...

Well, at the beginning,
it was just falling asleep, at--

you know,
and then I would take a pill

and I'd be set for six hours
or so.

-But not anymore?
-Not-- not anymore.

I-- I wake up after two
or three hours.

And what's your experience
of that waking time?

-Are you anxious?
-No. Not particularly, no.

-Worried?
-I'm tired.

What do you find yourself
thinking about?

I find myself wishing
that I had more Ambien.

Listen, I--
I've never slept well.

I've always had a problem
falling asleep.

And once you are sleeping,
do you sleep deeply?

-Are you restless?
-Not really.

Frequent dreams? Nightmares?

They're not uncommon
for people with sleep issues.

The-- the past several months,
I-- I have been waking up

with a recurring dream but...

Look, I'm not interested
in discussing that.

I know what the dream is about,

I know
what I've been suppressing,

I know what my unconscious
is trying to communicate

with me and...

And you're not interested
in telling me

-even in the general?
-No.

-I'm not.
-All right.

Would you consider telling me
what it is you feel

the dream has been communicating
to you?

I had a patient come in
for the first time

at the beginning of the week.

Frances.

She's a...

she's an actress.
A famous actress,

though not quite as famous
as she thinks she is.

Um, I probably shouldn't have--
I suppose you can guess

who I'm talking about
by the first name.

I'll-- I'll try not to.

I'm more interested in hearing
how she relates to the dream.

Okay.
Well, her sister is dying

of breast cancer.
Her younger sister. Patricia.

She didn't tell me right away.

I mean she had plenty else
to say.

She's-- Well,
she's what I kind of expected,

you know.
Self-involved, narcissistic,

did Beckett in London.

But once she got to it...

What?

She talked
about the genetic marker

for breast cancer,
the BRCA 1 gene.

How her mother had it
and then her sister.

That it's inherited.

My father died
of Parkinson's two years ago.

This is why you're seeing
the neurologist next week.

You're afraid
you may have Parkinson's.

My hand has been shaking
for three months.

Have you had
any other symptoms?

Stiffness, unsteadiness,
I drop things.

-Would you say this fear has--
-Look, it's not a fear,

doctor. It's a fact.

My hand shakes,
my father had Parkinson's.

That's why I'm seeing
the neurologist,

so the neurologist
can address it.

This...

this concern about Parkinson's,

do you think it has something
to do with the dream

that you've been having?

Well,
I've been actively ignoring

the clear symptoms
of the disease

and my unconscious
has been trying to get me

to stop ignoring it.

That must have been
very difficult to deal with.

Your father's death.

Was this during your treatment
with Gina Toll?

-Did you feel--
-Look, please. Enough.

I've been over this
a hundred times with Gina

about my anger at my father
for walking out on us

when I was a teenager.

My mother's suicide
when I was 17,

my need to save people
as a result.

I've been over this again
and again

with one of the best analysts
on the East Coast.

I do understand it all.

There's really nothing that--

Nothing more for you
to contribute to that.

I-- I just wanna make sure
I understand something.

Sure, fine.

You said
Gina toll was your teacher.

Mm-hm. Mm-hm.

And then
she was your supervisor?

-Yeah.
-And after that, your analyst.

-Yes.
-And she also saw you

and your ex-wife
as a couple's therapist?

Mm-hmm, correct.

Yeah, I see.

What do you mean, you see?

-What are you implying?
-I'm not implying anything.

I'm just trying to understand
the methods

of one of the best analysts
on the East Coast.

Are you fucking kidding me?

What are you, 36 years old?

You've been practicing for what?
Three or four years at the most?

Who the fuck are you
to question my treatment

over the past two decades?

You've been resistant
to discussion since you came in.

I'm trying to get
as full a sense as I can

of why that might be.

I'm sorry if I offended you.

-You seem distressed.
-Well, of course I'm distressed.

I haven't slept all week.

My wife's divorced me,

I'm alienated from my kids
who live with her

and this man
that she's gonna marry.

And I now realize
I've got a disease

which is gonna confine me
to a chair, trapped, paralyzed,

in five years or so,
and probably kill me within 10.

I think I have a right
to be distressed.

I think I have a right
to maybe have sleep problems,

-don't you think?
-Of course you have a right.

Yeah.

Before I fill out
the prescription,

I just need to ask
some medical questions. Um...

Do you have
any other medical issues

other than
the neurological issues

-you mentioned?
-No.

Are you currently taking
any medication?

Uh, just the Lipitor,
20mg a day.

Oh, and baby aspirin,
one tablet a day.

-Eighty-one milligrams?
-Right.

-Anything else?
-Look, I want you to know

that my treatment with Gina
was-- was an effective one.

Like I said,
she's a highly capable person

and she's able
to keep her roles separate

when necessary.
She knew me well.

There was a lot of trust
and-- and respect there and--

Uh... Yeah.

I understand.

I do apologize
if I offended you.

Can I ask what it feels like
to be reading

your analyst's novel?

I couldn't help notice
your book.

That's her, yes? Gina Toll?

Yeah. Yeah.

Well, like I said, she's--
she's a highly capable woman.

She therapizes, she supervises,
she writes.

You should see her on a trapeze.

Anyway, I saw the ad
in the paper yesterday

and then walking over here,
I was passing the bookshop

on Court Street and there it was
in the window, so I...

I guess I couldn't resist.

I-- I mean, if I'd thought
for one minute

about how you might see it,
I would've asked for a bag.

And how might I see it?

-Here we go.
-No, tell me what you imagine.

Do you really need me
to tell you?

A patient comes
into a new therapist's office

clutching a book
by his old therapist.

A giant picture of her face
grinning off the back? It's...

What? What were you gonna say?

Well, it's kind of embarrassing,
really.

It's like a shield
or a security blanket

or, you know, a kind of

-get-out-of-jail-free card.
-Get-out-of-jail-free card?

Please.
God, I wish I did have a bag.

Hmm.

Yeah.
It's a pretty good photograph.

It's airbrushed
but she looks great.

Great big smile,
very pleased with herself.

I would be with, uh,
with blurbs like these.

You've read the back?

"Insightful and sharp.

A masterful spin through
the tortured human psyche."

That's Lorrie Moore.

"Wise and deeply empathetic."
Amy Bloom.

I guess-- I guess it's good.

How does it feel,
reading those quotes?

Well, that's high praise
for a woman whose talent

and intellect
you say you respect.

-And yet you-- you read with--
-I'm happy for her.

-Okay.
-I am. I am.

It's-- I'm-- I'm not claiming
it's not--

it's-- it's not complicated.
And there's not some,

jealousy.
Sure, but of course, uh...

I'll tell you well I should wait
until I read it myself

but-- but I-- I'm pleased
for her.

-Yeah.
-What are you jealous of?

Well, clearly she's made
a new life for herself,

found a way to escape from...

from patients like me.

Quite a feat really.
Phoenix-like.

Why are you so convinced
Gina wanted to escape from you?

Well, give me another 10 minutes

and you'll understand
completely.

You're probably feeling it
already.

-No. I hadn't been.
-Well, you're extremely polite.

Do you feel that way
with your patients,

like you want to escape?

Well, I-- I told Gina once
that with patients,

I feel like...

it's like two mice in a--
in glue trap.

Stuck, immobile,

getting nowhere.

-She was disgusted to hear that.
-Do you still feel that way?

I've been a therapist for--
for 25 years, you know?

-I understand that.
-Well, I really--

You couldn't possibly,
but you will.

-Becomes...
-What?

Oppressive. Oppressive.

You start
to see the limitations,

the-- the artifice of it all.

In what ways?

Now, I'm genuinely curious.

Another analyst across from me.

I'd really like to know
what your experience has been.

I-- I-- I'd like to know
what's coming.

I see this teenager, Jesse.

And he's, uh, 16,
adopted, gay...

aggressive, pushes--
pushes everybody away.

Anyway, his, um...

his birth mother, called him
this-- this week

just out of the blue.

And he hasn't been able
to tell anybody.

Not-- not his mother,
not-- not a friend--

But he told you?

Yeah.

He told me.

Paid to listen intently.

There are times in that room
where-- where I feel...

I really feel that we--
we connect.

We-- we make contact.

And then he goes back
into the world,

the-- the-- the real world,
the actual world, and he just...

He implodes and-- and--
and the work

that we've done together
is just...

It's just gone.

I recognize that feeling.

It's incredibly frustrating
to feel

like you're not making progress.

Mm.

But don't you think even the act
of listening has value?

I've been seeing this, uh,
this new patient.

Uh, an immigrant from--
from Calcutta.

He wife died
about six months ago.

So his son
and his daughter-in-law

have him stuck
in the spare room.

No friends, no one to talk to.

So, they drag him to see me,
to make everything better.

And all he wants from me,
all he wants from me,

is for me
to bring his wife back.

He's got the loneliest face
I've ever-- I've ever seen.

Sits across
from me looking trapped,

without an ounce of belief
that I can do anything

to help him
and sometimes I just wanna say,

"Sunil, you're right.

There's--- there's nothing
I can do."

You described both
of these patients

as not having someone
to talk to,

confide in
at least outside your office

and I'm wondering if you do.

If I-- if-- if I-- if I do what?

All the significant attachments
in your life,

the ones you've mentioned here,
your father, your wife,

Gina have ended.

You say you're seeing less
of your kids.

I mean, do you have someone?
A friend, a companion,

another adult to talk to?

You mentioned
you were college friends

with Dr. Burdick
who referred you here.

-D-- do you talk with him?
-Do-- do I, um--

No, he--
but we're not really friends,

we're more old acquaintances.

But-- but yes, I do have
somebody to talk to.

I-- Her name is Wendy.

We've been seeing each other
and uh, yeah, I talk with her.

We-- we talk.

Is that who you were
on the phone with

-in the waiting room?
-Yes.

You told her
you were somewhere else.

What was it? The grocery store?

Well, she's 37. I'm 57.

I, uh, I haven't gotten
to the place

where I feel comfortable
telling her I have Parkinson's.

Well, I can understand
not wanting

to tell your girlfriend
about the possibility

of having Parkinson's
but letting her know

you have a therapy appointment
isn't exactly the same thing.

You're not seeing me
for Parkinson's.

Well, I mean, it--
it's all related, isn't it?

-How's that?
-Well, it's because

of the disease
I'm having the dream

and because I'm having a dream,

I can't sleep,

and because I can't sleep,
I'm here about to be late

for a movie, waiting for you
to-- to write a prescription.

Understood.

-You're seeing a movie?

Yes.

You and Wendy?

Yes, Wendy and me.

I'm gonna prescribe
the extended-release tablets.

Some people find them helpful
in sleeping through the night.

-Thank you.
-And just remember,

you can't take more
until six hours have elapsed.

How was your sleep last night?

I-- I woke up at half past two
and couldn't get back asleep.

-Woke up from the dream?
-Mm-hm.

You used very similar language
when you spoke

both about the possibility
of having Parkinson's

as well as your experience
of being a therapist.

You talked about Sunil
being stuck up

in the spare room,
about feeling trapped like mice

in a glue trap
with your patients.

That same language
of escape and entrapment

came up when you spoke
about Gina.

I'm wondering if your dream
has similar imagery.

No.

Actually, it doesn't.

Thank you for this.

ADELE BROUSE:
May I ask you one last thing?

Yes.

You said you had the dream again
last night?

-Yes.
-Here's what confuses me.

If you figured out
several days ago

what the dream means,

if the content has been
communicated

from your unconscious
to your conscious mind,

why are you still having it?

I've gotta go.

-Enjoy your movie.
-DR. PAUL WESTON: Thank you.

If you decide you wanna talk
any further,

my door is always open to you.

What did you just say?

Max.

Is everything okay?

Hey, Dad.

What-- what are you doing here?

I came to live with you.