Original subtitles

The Noodle Poop

Father said: "This was the grandest skirt I've ever seen."

He probably meant me, but it couldn't be, because I wore it.

Men are blind!

- Will you never regret it? - Never!

You can't go on dancing in the old blue one. It's too childish.

Do you really think so?

Do you know why father called it "Shooting Star?"

Because God sends a shooting star when two people fall in love.

Why are you so sad then?

That's love. You can become both happy and unhappy.

But that time I really loved him.

- Then I won't fall in love! - Don't think of father and me.

You should live your own life, together with your own sweetheart.

That's the whole point.

It's Kristoffer. He says he's got a letter for you.

Ida, may I talk to you?

Stay!

That's the grandest skirt I've ever seen!

- Will you be wearing it tonight? - If you're talking about me, save it!

Why would I need a letter? Why can't you just say it?

It's not the same. Forget it. I see you tonight.

- He's so sweet, Kristoffer! - He's a real noodle poop!

And I don't want to dance in this skirt!

I'll wear the old blue one!

I'll go to the beach with Klara.

Where do all the "water men" come from?

They're laying there, making babies all the time. They're fucking!

They look like those balloons you get when your tits are too small.

If you use the biggest, you'll get all the lovers you want, mom says!

How many do you get if you use balloons as big as this one?

Are you crazy? That huge tits? At least five lovers at once!

- Annie, will you come to stupid? - No!

She's got at least ten lovers!

Annie! Can't we go sit in the shade?

There's some shadow over there. Why don't we go there?

Be quiet! Think of something else for a change!

Ouch! Damn it! Look what happened! Help me!

Shit!

- Why are you always so disgusting? - Shit! What did he do to you?

You grow tired of lovers who only tell you you're disgusting!

What a creap! Did you see what he did?

That's how they are! Old pig!

She should have slapped his "water man."

He tricked her. Or she would never have touched... his water man.

His water man? Did she touch his water man?

- Kristoffer came with a letter. - For you? What did he write?

I won't get it until tonight.

Klara, our jellyfish...

It's the man's jellyfish.

- Who do you think will win tonight? - Don't know.

- I think you will. - Or you. We're both good at it.

Yes, but you'll dance with Kristoffer.

Do you think it's a love letter?

Doesn't matter. He's just a simple noodle poop.

Come! Let's go and find the letter.

Everyone will know, but we must not show, 'Cause Christian will flirt, with Klara in her skirt.

I can show nothing, and that's the worst part, -

- 'cause when we dance, Ida's my sweetheart.

'Cause when we dance, Ida's my sweetheart.

That was very mean!

I won't dance with him. They can say what they want.

And the competition? Your granny will be crazy!

Even if she kills me, he can't touch me.

I know! Let's hide his costume, then he can't dance!

And that's for everything. Work, food, lovers...

How else do you think mother learned to sing, huh?

Hi, Camilla.

You already have a steady dance partner, damn it!

Twenty. At the most twenty!

Look at these hands, and you'll realize it's been 40 years.

Ida! Where are you going?

Come and say hello to our fine judge.

- This is Klara. - Enchanting.

- And little Ida, my grand child. - Very enchanting!

One of them will win the cup. Ida dances with a very nice boy.

Kristoffer.

Beauty and nice dance partners. It runs in the family.

May I?

Just as your grand mother's hands!

Yes, well... 40 years ago. That was in Berlin.

We should have carried on.

We could have won the big cup.

Back up...

I've got it!

- I can't be bothered. - Why not?

You've been so excited about it!

- I don't feel like dancing. - You don't?

Just do it. Or grand mother will be sad. She's so proud.

- The noodle poop's costume is missing! - So? Does he want to borrow a dress?

But, Ida! I almost thought you two were in love!

We're not! He's quite mad!

Well, those things I can't understand.

Remember that granny will follow you home.

Come on, Skrubsak.

You won't leave? Ida might win the cup.

And there's free dancing and a party after.

Skrubsak will enjoy it. And think of all the nice men!

Mother, I can't be bothered with such pick up games.

Pick up games? You're not a man!

Dancing can give you anybody you want!

Can you actually get anybody you want?

If you believe that those were just your dance partners, you're very na�ve.

And you know what?

Lovers is the best thing in the world! And the one who dances best, -

- can decide for herself who she wants!

Come girls! Let's get ready!

Let's march to the dance floor!

Well, children! Hold each other tight.

Follow each other's movements. Note the rythm.

Indulge! Now life begins!

Christian is coming!

Come on, Klara! I couldn't find you. The competition has begun!

If Ida doesn't dance, I won't either.

- Why won't she dance? - Dance with whom, stupid!

- Somebody hid the noodle poop's costume. - He says it just disappeared.

That's what I said! Are you deaf?

Let's win the cup! Come on - dance, dance!

- Let them get it in the butt! - Leave it! I'll give you one on the water man!

- You didn't have to kick him! - That brat can't even dance!

Klara! The drummer! It's the one with the water man.

Oh, shit!

And here's the noodle poop!

You have to forgive me, but I can't find my costume, so I can't dance.

- It doesn't matter. - Yes, it does!

You're the only one who deserves to win the cup.

- I don't care about it. - Okay, but I wanted to dance!

There are several others you can dance with.

I wouldn't dream of it!

Christian and Camilla told! Our friends!

You don't tell on your friends!

Listen, Ida and Klara! Someone says you've hidden Kristoffer's costume -

- so he can't dance! - That's not true!

Is this true, Ida?

- Well... - What will the judge think?!

A dance school where the best doesn't win the cup!

Either you are expelled from the school, or you'll tell if it's you who hid the costume!

It wasn't to be mean! I think Kristoffer is cute, -

- but Ida was angry for the poem we found in his costume, and so...

So you don't tell on your friends, huh?!

Idiot!

That's enough, Ida!

Get out, or ask Kristoffer's forgiveness! Now!

Klara! Now it's up to you to make things better!

Ida! Ida!

I couldn't find you. Where were you?

Mother went home. The drummer is missing.

They drove off in his car. I can't dance now.

They just flirted, and drove off with high speed! Ida!

Skrubsak... Come here...

I saw some lovers who were kissing.

And they cuddled.

All over the stomach, and up here, around the neck.

- Yuck! Wasn't it disgusting? - Yes, it looked very disgusting.

No!

She liked it! He would cuddle her breasts.

Her breasts... where?

She was very disgusting, right?

Don't be childish. He removed her panties, too!

- I'm sure she would pee. - No, you do that when it's for real.

Oh, shit...

What the hell are you doing? Stop that!

Idiot!

You can't sit here feeling sorry for yourself. All alone.

I'm not! Why would I?

- Because you made us lose. - You started it!

- That poem of yours! - You know I meant well!

- It was one of those... love poems. - Really? We are not in love!

- We will be, soon! - Stop behaving like a swine!

I just want to be left alone!

You're laying there, shivering! Take my coat!

It's nice and warm.

It's just like becoming somebody else.

- I just want to be me. - That can only happen if you kiss me!

If I become somebody else what will I become?

You will be sweet, because you will be my love.

- Come back! Come! - Yes, but now it's you!

- You don't want to be my sweetheart? - Yes, I do, I do!

Kristoffer!

Kristoffer, you noodle poop!

Lots here are dancing for the exercise, I'm sure.

Move their legs and practice. And that's excellent.

But if it's not the arms and the legs, it's the heart that moves, -

- you shine like a shooting star -

- if you dance with the right one.

That's why the winning team is -

- team number 6!

I have the great pleasure to hand you this cup.

Mother!

Look, I won the cup! And a sweetheart!

The best dancer chose, and it was us that won!

Nice, Klara. When it comes to love, all tricks are allowed.

What has happened?

What's the matter, Ida?

I was his sweetheart.

- Whose sweetheart were you? - Kristoffer's.

Why did he become Klara's sweetheart?

Damn noodle poop!

Such things you don't decide. You can't know.

I saw the poem he wrote. It was us that were sweethearts.

Did he really write a poem?

But does he know you like him?

How would he know if you haven't told him? Or showed him?

If this Kristoffer business is serious, it's serious.

You can't look like a clown.

If he really wrote that poem, he's really in love with you.

Then he's yours, and you can take him from anybody.

But only if you really mean it. Do you?

It doesn't matter if you keep jellyfish in strange places.

Jellyfish are really a nuisance, but not today!

Don't wait for him. Nothing happens unless you do it yourself.

Don't excuse yourself for Klara.

Just trust the poem Kristoffer wrote.

But what if he's really Klara's sweetheart?

I don't think so.

You have to risk it. Do you want him or not?

I want him!

We, the orchestra, want to say thank you for this evening. Have a safe trip home!

Could you fetch my coat? Your grandchild has fallen asleep inside it

- I have to go. - Wait.

This is true love. If the music starts, they will dance -

- for the first time ever. Just like...

...like 40 years ago.

Name a way that is long and beautiful enough for their love.

Yes, my friend. It's the Milky Way.

What are you saying?

If only we have had that drummer! Ida has earned that much.

All beautiful girls have earned a drummer!

Who knows where the path goes in the dark of night

Who knows if it will work?

Who knows if darkness will ever clear away

And if there is

any light to reach

If you will smile at me and forget

that I was blind for you

if you can see the flame in my voice

I know you'll acknowledge me

I can see an eternal light, a star above me

Nothing can estrange you from me

and me from this path

Now that you and I will never be apart again

I know my path so well

My longing for heaven will mellow

'coz you are the star beneath me.

English Translation: Pepi@a.b.m.thelostmovies, April 2008