Original subtitles

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

Going down the rabbit hole

Where we're going no one knows

Obstacles 'round every bend

Let's see where the tunnel ends

Here we are, Squeaks, the Grand Canyon.

It took 18 days to get here, but it only felt like 17.

(MUMBLES)

-Your legs are asleep? -Hmm, yep.

Well, maybe the next time you could help me dig,

rather than napping the entire way.

-Check out this magnificent vista. -(YAWNING)

BUGS: Look at those soaring cliffs.

Those majestic mountains.

Look at this filthy beard, and these flaring nostrils.

Rabbit, you didn't knock.

Why are you bothering me in my hole?

Your hole? This ain't your hole, doc.

This is the Grand Canyon.

Not anymore! Now it's the Barbarian's hole!

I claim everything you see as my own.

Give me a break, doc.

I don't give!

I take! Now take off!

(BUGS AND SQUEAKS SCREAMING)

(BOTH GROANING)

What?

That Barbarian thinks he can just take over the Grand Canyon?

Not on my watch.

-Ah, perfect. -(DOORBELL RINGS)

Isn't that how it always goes?

-You just get comfortable. -(RINGING CONTINUES)

(GRUNTS) Coming!

-Hold your polar bears! -(DOORBELL CONTINUES)

-(BARBARIAN GROANS) -O-M-G!

Look at this kitchen, look at this living space.

Who did your decorating? Early australopithecus?

-It needs updating. -Who are you?

Your interior decorator. Now here's what I see.

We tear out these bushes and lay down some hardwood floors,

and here we build a deck for entertaining.

-This obviously has to go. -Ow!

-And this pebble will never do. -Wait!

(STRAINING) Load-bearing pebble.

(GROANING)

BUGS: Hold the phone!

Why is that boulder there?

That's my couch!

You can't put a couch there.

What? Oh!

It throws off the energy of the entire room!

Haven't you ever heard of feng shui?

(GRUNTS) What should I do?

Move the boulder, dum-dum.

(STRUGGLING)

Actually, try it over there.

(GRUNTS)

Hmm, a touch further back, a little to the right.

-Higher. Higher. Stop! -(BARBARIAN GRUNTING)

Right there! That's perfect!

-(STRUGGLING) -Hold it right there!

-(CRASHES) -Mmm, well, you lost it.

Well, you could've done it the easy way,

but instead he did it the feng shui.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

(GRUNTING) Rabbit!

(BOTH GASP)

(MILD GRUNTING)

Come on, you dumb bear! After them!

(BUGS AND SQUEAKS GRUNTING)

Oh, Barbie! I'd be careful if I were you.

One misstep and you'll fall into the chasm.

You don't know me very well, rabbit.

What I do know is that's a very thin bridge of pebbles and stone,

and it'll never carry your bear's weight.

Already thought of that, genius!

That's why I'm going to carry him across.

And it's pronounced chasm, not chasm, smart guy!

Well, in that case, it's not pronounced pebbles and stone.

It's pronounced pebble sandstone.

(BLOWING)

What? Oh, me and my big mouth.

-(SCREAMING) -Bye!

(CONTINUES SCREAMING)

(GROANS AND YELPS)

What a bungle brain.

What a muttonhead.

You!

-(GRUNTS) -What an entrance!

Yikes! Oh!

Ow!

-Whoa! -(WOOD SHATTERING)

(GRUNTS) All set?

Okay, so one Grand Canyon teddy,

a Grand Canyon ball cap, a Grand Canyon backscratcher.

One hand woven Grand Canyon rug.

A Grand Canyon keychain, Grand Canyon magnets, mugs, medallions.

And one year-long membership to the Grand Canyon Archival Society

to make you a genuine card-carrying,

Grand Canyon librarian barbarian.

That'd be $911.12.

Huh? What do you mean you need credit card?

All right, but this is the last time.

I'm not made of money, you know? (SCREAMS)

(FREE FALLING)

(YELPS)

(GRUNTS)

Hey, bub. Is this here your hole?

-Yes, why? -That wall you got over there is a zoning violation.

Knock it down or else I'll have to slap you with a $10,000 fine.

(STRUGGLING) That wall over there, huh?

Not a problem. I never really liked it there.

It throws off the energy of the place. (CHUCKLES)

Have you ever heard of sheng fui?

Hmm, no.

(GRUNTING)

Hey! It's also a $10,000 penalty for watering without a permit.

Yeah!

Uh...

Oh, boy!

(WATER GUSHING)

(BUGS HUMMING)

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

(GASPING)

It's a $15,000 fine for swimming in a newly declared fishing zone.

Help! Help! But I'm drowning!

Well, I hope you have life insurance,

otherwise it's another $10,000.

What? Okay! Here!

And an additional charge for paying in a foreign currency.

Wait a second.

Rabbit!

-(TOILET FLUSHING) -I always wondered what that was for.

(SCREAMING)

Pee-yew! I wouldn't go in there if I were you.

Well, Squeaks, here it is.

The Grand Canyon!

(EAGLE SCREAMING DISTANTLY)

-Meh. -What do you mean "meh?"

(HUMMING)

Nothing more peaceful than grooming my bonsai tree.

I find by stunting its growth and pruning its leaves,

it brings me closer to nature.

-(HUMMING) -(THUDS)

-(LOUD THUD) -Yikes.

-(LOUD THUD) -(GROANS) Hey, Bigfoot.

How did you know it was me, Lady?

Took a lucky guess.

"I took a lucky guess."

Bigfoot, what are you doing?

I'm being you, listen,

"Bigfoot, don't eat the computer.

"Bigfoot, don't sit on the birds.

"Bigfoot, don't you have a home to go to?"

That doesn't sound anything like me.

Yes, it does.

"Not now, Bigfoot, I'm busy."

I've never said that in my life.

Great, then you wanna play a game?

Not now, Bigfoot, I'm busy.

(THUDS)

You know what, yes, let's play a game.

It's called, "Go juggle, porcupines."

I love that game!

Sheesh.

Hey! I heard something over here.

Everyone, keep it down.

(BEEPING)

-We don't want to scare it. -Smaller than expected.

I don't wear gloves.

Hey, there is such a thing as personal space.

-(ALL GASPING) -A talking rabbit.

I would never have believed it.

This rabbit is extraordinary.

Think of how rich we will be!

Book deals, talk shows, licensing.

We can even make a cartoon about him.

He's perfect.

Eh, I've seen better.

Who are you guys?

We are hunters of the extraordinary!

We're Extraordinary Hunters!

Not from where I'm standing.

We've heard stories about a cunning, talking rabbit,

who's outwitted many an adversary.

I know him. He's in that creepy cave over there, go get him.

(LIONS SNARLING)

Well, let's get him!

No, Dale, he is the one.

(CHUCKLING) Nice try!

You must come with us.

No, thanks, I'm fine where I am.

I'm actually in the middle of enjoying an afternoon of peace and solitude.

So why don't you all just run along?

BIGFOOT: Hey, Lady!

I could only find one porcupine.

What is that?

A giant rabbit!

How extraordinary!

Chase him into the forest, so all of you get as far away from me as you can.

Okay, let's bring him in safe, we don't want to hurt him.

It's naptime.

(SLEEPING DARTS FIRING)

(GRUNTING)

(GIGGLING) Now back at you!

(BOTH YELLING)

(GROANING)

(GIGGLING) Hey, come and get me!

The giant rabbit went that way!

Wow! Shh!

Lady is sleeping. I should be very quiet.

-Hey, bee! -Ouch!

All right, let it all go, Bugs.

Peace and quiet, peace and...

(LOUD CRY)

(SIGHS)

-(LOUD CRY) -All right, that tears it!

No more Mr. Nice Bunny.

(LOUD CRY)

Argh! What is that terrible sound?

It's my giant rabbit call.

You guys are making a big mistake.

You're just jealous because we found a better bunny.

Yeah, he's extra, extra extraordinary. (GIGGLES)

And you're just a regular rabbit.

A regular rabbit?

Yeah, a regular rabbit.

-Why, I ought to... -(LOUD CRY)

(TEETH CHATTERING) Stop doing that.

That doesn't sound anything like a rabbit.

Oh, yeah?

(LOUD CRY)

It's working.

Look at these giant rabbit tracks.

Those are mine.

Hey, I found giant rabbit droppings.

They aren't that big.

Ooh, I guess I am a regular rabbit.

All right, the giant rabbit is close.

Now listen up, this is where we set up the trap.

(ROPES CREAKING)

And then we'll hide and wait for him to come by.

We need some kind of giant rabbit bait.

Banas.

He doesn't like banas, he likes pudding.

-Pudding? -Where are we gonna get pudding?

I'd like some pudding.

You guys don't know when to quit.

Listen, Mr. Ordinary Talking Rabbit.

We're the hunters here, and we're no longer interested in you.

We've got bigger fish to catch and...

He's right behind me, isn't he?

-Hey, Lady! -(ALL YELL)

Look, it's me!

That's not a giant rabbit.

I never would have believed it.

He's a donkey!

It's not a donkey.

-It's a Bigfoot! -(SCREAMING)

That's what I was trying to tell you.

Quick, get in close! I'll take a picture for proof.

-Yeah, yeah. -That's a good idea.

I smell trouble.

I wanna get you all in frame, so everyone back up.

Yeah, just a little more.

Bigfoot, take one big step back.

(ALL SCREAMING)

So much for proof.

It's not nice to fly away in the middle of a picture.

Hey! Lady and I never finished our game.

(SIGHS)

-Finally, peace and... -BIGFOOT: Hey, Lady!

Not now, Bigfoot.

-BIGFOOT: I found it. -Found what?

-The porcupine! -No, no, no!

-(SMACK) -(BUGS CRIES OUT)

Going down the rabbit hole

Where we're going no one knows

Obstacles 'round every bend

Let's see where the tunnel ends

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