Original subtitles

NARRATOR: It is a well-known psychological fact

that people's behavior is strongly affected by the way they dress.

For instance,

if we alter this gentleman's attire to something more romantic,

certain changes in attitude may perhaps be detected.

Batten down the keelhaul! Yahoo! Kill the women and children first!

Blood! Gore! Spit 'em on the tatters!

(PANTING)

NARRA TOR. Even a change of hats will usually bring certain changes.

Look at this mild-mannered little man.

A rather quaint figure, we might say, in his old-fashioned clothes.

Yet, put a hunter's cap on his head and let's see what happens.

Bang, bang, bang! Come out of your holes, you cowardly rabbits!

Bang, bang! And I'll blow you to smithereenies!

Come on out now and let me see the color of your spurting blood.

My spurting blood? Yipe!

(ELMER LAUGHING)

NARRA TOR. To pursue this interesting phenomenon a bit further,

let's have this happen.

(PANTING)

Okay, you cruddy rabbit, I know you're in there!

Come on out.

(GUN FIRING)

Attention!

Okay, soldier, explain your actions!

Well, you see, sir, I was just out shooting rabbits with my gun.

All right, dogface, how come every other private in this man's army's got a rifle

and you've got a gun?

Well, I...

About face!

Forward march!

BUGS: Hut, two, three, four.

Hut, two, three, four. Company, halt!

Forward!

March.

(SPLASH)

I have returned.

Yipes! I've been outweighed!

Okay, buster, what's the idea shooting sergeants out of season?

Well, you see, sir, I, uh...

I... I was just shooting turkeys for the first Thanksgiving dinner.

Ugh!

(WHOOPING)

Hey, lady, lady, wait, wait! Don't move! I'll be right there!

A scout is trustworthy, loyal, helpful, friendly, courteous, kind,

obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean,

and helps old ladies cross the street at all times

without expectation of recompense, neither.

Thank you very much, young man.

I got you now, you rabbit!

I'm gonna blow you into a million rabbit cutlets.

Okay, Morelli, come out of there.

I told you, Morelli, this was my territory.

Told you to keep out. So,

I'm gonna rub you out, Morelli. See?

Yeah, rub you. Out. See?

Yeah. See? Out.

See? Out.

See?

All right, Rocky. You're coming with me, you malefactor.

Hey, look, copper, we can settle this out of court. Yeah, moola. Yeah.

Ten Gs. Buy something for the kids, yeah.

How dare you try to bribe me, you miscreant!

Well?

Well, you see, Your Honor, I...

You're a family man, Monahan, so I'm only going to sentence you to 45 years

at hard labor.

One thing I cannot abide is a dishonest police officer.

ELMER: Oh, Judge!

Will you marry me?

Certainly, my darling sweetie.

I would be delighted to marry up with you.

You know, I think it always helps a picture to have a romantic ending.

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