Original subtitles

I have sent for you, Dodgers, because we are facing a crisis.

The world's supply of illudium fosdex, the shaving cream atom...

is alarmingly low.

Now, we have reason to believe that the only remaining source is on Planet X.

Somewhere in this area.

And you want me to find Planet X, is that it?

Can you do it, Dodgers?

Indubitably, sir.

Because there's no one knows his way around outer space like Duck Dodgers...

in the 24th-and-a-half century!

Are you ready, eager young space cadet?

I'm ready, all set, Your Heroship, sir.

Then make way for Duck Dodgers...

in the 24th-and-a-half century!

Had the silly thing in reverse.

Now then, eager young space cadet...

here is the course we shall pursue to find Planet X.

Starting from where we are, we go 33,600 turbo miles due up.

Then west, in astro arc deviation to here.

Then, following the great circle, seven radio lubes south by downeast...

by astro astrobal, to here, here and here.

Then by space navigal compass...

to here, here, and then to here, and here.

By 13-point strato cumulus, bearing four million light years...

and thus to our destination.

Now do you know how to reach Planet X?

Oh, sure.

I wish you'd explain it to me sometime, buster!

Why, it's very simple, sir.

If we follow those planets, we can't very well miss Planet X.

That's ridiculous. Of all the stupid suggestions.

Wait a minute. I think I've got it.

I'll just bet that if we follow those planets, we'll find Planet X.

Gad! How do I do it?

I don't know.

I claim this planet in the name of the Earth!

I claim this planet in the name of Mars.

Isn't that lovely?

Look, bud, I've got news for you.

I have already claimed this bit of dirt for the Earth.

And there just ain't room enough on this planet for the two of us.

I believe you are right.

Little does he realize that I have on my disintegration-proof vest.

You may fire when ready, grizzly.

What, where, when, how, who...

Oh, you?

Just when I had him going you had to butt in!

Get back in that spaceship!

Yes, Your Heroship, sir.

Got the drop on you with my disintegrating pistol!

And, brother, when it disintegrates, it disintegrates.

What do you know? It disintegrated.

Happy birthday, you thing from another world, you.

Thank you.

Well, I guess he's had enough. I'll send him an ultimatum.

I'll see what the little stinker is up to on my super video-detecto set.

That's the last straw!

Now I use my secret weapon!

As I was saying, buster, this planet ain't big enough for the two of us.

So, off you go.

And now, this planet is hereby claimed for the Earth...

in the name of Duck Dodgers...

in the 24th-and-a-half century!

Big deal.

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