Original subtitles

(acoustic music with soft humming)

- [Mary] Cleo!

Cleo?

- Sorry Mum, late.

- How is it possible for you to be late for everything?

It's simple, take note of what time

you're suppose to leave and start preparing earlier.

- I will!

- [Mary] I'm getting you a diary.

- I've got my journal.

- A proper diary.

- I wouldn't use it.

- So what are you late for now?

- [Cleo] Edgar.

- You're supposed to be looking for work.

- We're doing interview skills!

- Cleo!

Cleo.

Do you know what?

I don't like this Edgar fellow.

- Why?

- You know nothing about him.

- I know plenty.

- [Mary] Like?

- He likes books.

- Oh, does he now, so what's his favorite then?

- He loves all the books.

- Have you never stopped to ask yourself

why a man of his age doesn't have a proper career?

He could have a criminal record for all you know!

- Mother, you're freaking yourself out again.

Edgar is harmless, he's like a cuddly librarian.

(phone vibrating)

- Hello?

- Cuddly?

- I'm not late, you're early.

I'm nearly there!

I'll see you in five alright.

Right, even later now.

S'later!

- [Mary] Ahem!

- Oh alright then.

(acoustic guitar music)

♪ The first time I had laughing gas, I cried ♪

♪ The first time I had laughing gas, I cried ♪

(knocking)

- Come in.

Morning Miss Rathbone.

- Mornin' Eddie.

- Don't call me Eddie.

- I'm sorry, I mean potential employer.

- Right let's start with the important one first.

What skills do you think you can bring to our workplace?

- The ones that pay the bills my good man.

- Cleo, please.

- Okay.

I think I can bring a good team ethic,

a sense of humour too.

Both important to the workplace right?

And these bad boys!

My arm looks like a swan.

- This is serious!

- Clearly.

- I'm sorry I know it is.

But this is silly.

I work better under pressure.

I will be fine on the day, I promise.

- Well, just for today, could you just humour me?

An interview could come up any day now

and I just need to feel like I'm doing something.

- Okay.

Go.

- Okay. (clears throat)

What experience do you have?

If any?

- Well I have a pretty decent blog.

- How would you define decent?

- People seem to dig it.

Urm.

Well I guess I have some previous experience

as a self employed paparazzi?

Paparazzo?

Pap!

- Really?

- I tried getting newsworthy photos of celebrities

but the best I could manage was an out-of-focus snap

of Stephen Fry eating a cheese wheel.

- Right, I give up.

- That was true.

- Do you still have the photos?

- I lost 'em.

- You don't keep spares?

- I used a polaroid camera.

(groaning)

Your turn.

(knocking)

Come in.

- Blimey.

- Ah Mr. Ernest!

One was wondering when you would be making an appearance.

Better late than never I suppose.

- We were literally just...

Fine.

I apologize, I'm usually very prompt.

- Do you want me to start Mr. Ernest?

As we seem to be running on your time.

- Fire away.

- I'll decide who gets fired Mr. Ernest.

You walk through these doors, I am your Lord Sugar,

you are but my apprentice.

What is your best quality?

Now don't give me a list of the usual cliches.

I want your single best quality.

- Commitment.

I bring commitment.

You want me, you got me.

I dedicate myself to my responsibilities.

I am ready to dedicate myself to a career.

- And what previous experience can you bring to our cause?

- I used to run my own book shop.

- Really?

- Co-run.

- [Cleo] What happened?

- I ran it with my wife.

- You have a wife!

- Had.

There was an accident.

A car accident.

So the book shop failed.

I really loved it.

It didn't feel like work, you know.

- We don't have to talk about it.

- It was our home.

Things change.

That's why I'm stuck here

preparing for these bloody interviews

for a job I don't even want.

This wasn't the plan.

- Well Mr. Ernest!

We love emotion here at Rathbone Industries;

and you've got plenty of it!

The job is yours!

- Peachy.

You got anywhere you need to be?

- Nope!

- What do you say we get out of here?

- Still no.

In fact, put that away.

- Oh God, you're not a sex offender are you?

- No!

So you looking forward to seeing her?

- Who?

- You'll see.

- Whoooo. (laughs)

- Missed you kiddo!

Thanks for taking her today.

Cleo, this is Julie.

- Otherwise known as Mum.

- And this is Sophia.

- Howdy!

- Cleo's helping me find a job sweetie.

What do you say?

Shall we all go and play on the swings?

- [Julie] In this weather?

- Killjoy.

I'll race ya!

Come on Cleo.

(gentle guitar music)