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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,080 --> 00:00:05,896 This programme contains violent scenes and images of the deceased 2 00:00:05,920 --> 00:00:08,376 that viewers may find distressing from the very start, 3 00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:10,936 strong language, offensive and discriminatory attitudes, 4 00:00:10,960 --> 00:00:13,216 and scenes of a sexual nature throughout. 5 00:00:13,240 --> 00:00:14,560 SIRENS 6 00:00:15,800 --> 00:00:17,400 WOMAN WAILS 7 00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:22,680 POLICE RADIO CHATTER 8 00:00:29,320 --> 00:00:31,960 ECHOING: You! You murderer! 9 00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:37,000 This isn't murder. 10 00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:41,520 It's an execution. 11 00:00:50,840 --> 00:00:52,616 TAPE REWINDS 12 00:00:52,640 --> 00:00:54,616 SINGING ♪ Fallen in love with someone 13 00:00:54,640 --> 00:00:57,216 ♪ Ever fallen in love, in love with someone 14 00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:58,696 ♪ Ever fallen in love 15 00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:01,520 ♪ In love with someone you shouldn't've fallen in love with 16 00:01:06,840 --> 00:01:11,056 ♪ Fallen in love with someone you shouldn't've fallen in love with. ♪ 17 00:01:11,080 --> 00:01:13,456 Yeah! Woo! Yes, Clive. 18 00:01:13,480 --> 00:01:15,920 Come on, Clive! HE LAUGHS. 19 00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:20,080 RADIO MUSIC: Ever Fallen In Love by Buzzcocks. 20 00:02:09,920 --> 00:02:12,736 Excuse me, I'm looking for Connor. 21 00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:14,376 I think he's up on the roof. 22 00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,696 On the Bishop Street side. 23 00:02:16,720 --> 00:02:18,056 Thanks... 24 00:02:18,080 --> 00:02:19,376 Rajesh. 25 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:20,520 Cheers. 26 00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:31,760 {\an8}WORKMEN CHATTER. 27 00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:39,176 {\an8}How'd you get in? I was just passing. 28 00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:40,336 {\an8}How's it going? 29 00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:43,096 {\an8}You're passing ten floors up. How's that happen? 30 00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:44,696 There's no jobs, Clive, I've got nothing. 31 00:02:44,720 --> 00:02:46,736 Yeah, I was just wondering, cos, you know, I find myself free, 32 00:02:46,760 --> 00:02:48,376 so I thought I'd offer. No, don't need you. 33 00:02:48,400 --> 00:02:50,256 I can do anything. 34 00:02:50,280 --> 00:02:52,576 Where's that lad that used to work for you, Francis? 35 00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:53,736 Where's he now? 36 00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:54,896 I got rid of him. 37 00:02:54,920 --> 00:02:56,096 I'll tell you where he is. 38 00:02:56,120 --> 00:02:57,136 He's working for Ashbury's. 39 00:02:57,160 --> 00:02:59,256 And do you know what? He's happy. 40 00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:00,816 Proper little smiler, he is. 41 00:03:00,840 --> 00:03:03,376 Not when he was with you. He was miserable as sin, 42 00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:04,896 cos you bullied him, night and day. 43 00:03:04,920 --> 00:03:06,856 He was useless. He was good, Clive. 44 00:03:06,880 --> 00:03:08,376 You stamped on him. 45 00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:09,656 So, no, I don't have any jobs, 46 00:03:09,680 --> 00:03:10,856 cos no one likes working with you. 47 00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:13,176 You're a fucking misery, truth be told. 48 00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:14,336 You'll employ Rajesh. 49 00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:15,536 Yes, I will. 50 00:03:15,560 --> 00:03:16,800 What's wrong with him? 51 00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:20,976 Just... work's a bit short, so if you hear of anything, I... 52 00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:22,256 I won't. Well, if you do... 53 00:03:22,280 --> 00:03:24,776 I won't! But there is something. 54 00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:27,136 You can tell your lot I said thanks. 55 00:03:27,160 --> 00:03:29,216 What do you mean? I've been going sites like these 56 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:32,576 since I was 16 years old, and I saved, Clive. 57 00:03:32,600 --> 00:03:34,376 Saved like a dog right from the start, 58 00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:36,456 cos I thought, "I'd like a nice life one day." 59 00:03:36,480 --> 00:03:38,136 Just me and the missus, nice little life. 60 00:03:38,160 --> 00:03:40,536 And I got one. Tiny little farmhouse. 61 00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:42,696 It's a wreck, but I done it up. 62 00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:45,056 Ten years it took me, now it's all done. 63 00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:47,456 My retirement, all set up. 64 00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:50,736 Except I can go there for 90 days. That's all. 65 00:03:50,760 --> 00:03:52,896 Just 90 sodding days, 66 00:03:52,920 --> 00:03:54,696 cos it's in France, isn't it? 67 00:03:54,720 --> 00:03:57,856 90 days and I've gotta go home, thanks to your lot. 68 00:03:57,880 --> 00:04:00,896 Now I'm voting leave, for you. 69 00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:02,640 Piss off, Clive. 70 00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:38,816 I can pay you 120 a day. 71 00:04:38,840 --> 00:04:40,216 I can do bar work for that. 72 00:04:40,240 --> 00:04:41,576 Yeah, but I'm paying two wages. 73 00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:43,696 Sick pay for Bugs, and now his replacement. 74 00:04:43,720 --> 00:04:45,560 I can give you six days, and that's it. 75 00:04:57,560 --> 00:04:58,680 SOFT CHATTER 76 00:04:59,960 --> 00:05:01,560 THEY LAUGH 77 00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:07,216 Um, do you mind not eating in the hall? 78 00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:09,536 Eh? It's like a doss house. 79 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:12,296 Some of us have got to live here. 80 00:05:12,320 --> 00:05:15,136 Are you gonna be turning the electric off again? 81 00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:17,456 You should've got a letter. I did, and I read it, 82 00:05:17,480 --> 00:05:20,576 and it was a photocopy, it wasn't specific to this place, 83 00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:22,840 so I don't trust you for a second. 84 00:05:27,120 --> 00:05:28,280 Diane. 85 00:05:29,880 --> 00:05:31,240 Flat five. 86 00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:36,016 Clive. 87 00:05:36,040 --> 00:05:37,400 See you, Clive. 88 00:05:47,520 --> 00:05:49,136 TV: This roll? 89 00:05:49,160 --> 00:05:51,776 Please, stop! Stop, stop! 90 00:05:51,800 --> 00:05:52,840 Yes! 91 00:05:54,880 --> 00:05:56,520 TV CONTINUED: £100 in the bank. 92 00:05:58,440 --> 00:06:01,280 Right, your second go. Good luck. 93 00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:05,080 Liz... Liz. 94 00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:17,536 That's what I like to see. 95 00:06:17,560 --> 00:06:18,960 Hard at work. 96 00:06:20,840 --> 00:06:22,816 Where's your... your little mates? 97 00:06:22,840 --> 00:06:24,656 Oh, you know what it's like, same old story. 98 00:06:24,680 --> 00:06:27,616 New job across town, and off they go. 99 00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:29,856 If I was in charge, I wouldn't allow it. 100 00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:32,496 Oh, so you're not the boss, then? 101 00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:35,456 HE LAUGHS. No, not me, no. 102 00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:38,656 If I was running this, it'd be finished by now. 103 00:06:38,680 --> 00:06:40,376 Well... 104 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:43,016 that would be a shame. 105 00:06:43,040 --> 00:06:45,856 So, packed his stuff, chucked him out. 106 00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:47,136 That wasn't the end of it, though, 107 00:06:47,160 --> 00:06:49,176 because he'd left all these bills unpaid. 108 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:50,576 I found them! 109 00:06:50,600 --> 00:06:52,776 He'd stuffed them away, 110 00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:54,336 hidden them, like a squirrel. 111 00:06:54,360 --> 00:06:56,496 There was council tax, electricity, 112 00:06:56,520 --> 00:06:58,336 some of them going back months. 113 00:06:58,360 --> 00:07:00,336 I said, "What's all this?" 114 00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:02,296 He said, "I just panic." 115 00:07:02,320 --> 00:07:04,376 I said, "What do you mean, you just panic?" 116 00:07:04,400 --> 00:07:06,816 He said, "It's me dyslexia." 117 00:07:06,840 --> 00:07:08,336 Oh, God, I bet, yeah. 118 00:07:08,360 --> 00:07:10,456 That's just a bloody excuse, isn't it? 119 00:07:10,480 --> 00:07:11,656 That's what I said! 120 00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:13,456 You know, there's no such thing as dyslexia. 121 00:07:13,480 --> 00:07:15,616 Oh, my God, that's exactly what I said! 122 00:07:15,640 --> 00:07:17,056 I've been saying that to him for years. 123 00:07:17,080 --> 00:07:19,896 It's just a fraud. You know, it's, like, this billion-dollar industry. 124 00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:23,176 Oh, my God, you are like a voice in the wilderness. 125 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:26,176 This is too good to be true. 126 00:07:26,200 --> 00:07:29,176 Come on, tell me, is there a Mrs Clive? 127 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:31,736 Eh? Because there is, isn't there? 128 00:07:31,760 --> 00:07:32,936 Yeah, yeah. 129 00:07:32,960 --> 00:07:34,136 Marie. 130 00:07:34,160 --> 00:07:36,336 Been married 24 years. 131 00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:38,896 Two boys, Saul and George. 132 00:07:38,920 --> 00:07:40,136 Old-fashioned names. 133 00:07:40,160 --> 00:07:42,416 Yeah. 134 00:07:42,440 --> 00:07:45,976 And how are you, you and Marie? 135 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:47,320 Yeah, we're OK. 136 00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:52,200 You know, both a bit knackered, but... 137 00:07:53,280 --> 00:07:54,480 I'm in the bad books. 138 00:07:56,240 --> 00:07:58,920 You know, I have been for a very long time. 139 00:08:02,040 --> 00:08:03,200 Why? 140 00:08:08,960 --> 00:08:11,936 Go easy, it costs me enough. 141 00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:13,176 Oh... 142 00:08:13,200 --> 00:08:16,056 I just, just made a mistake, you know? 143 00:08:16,080 --> 00:08:18,056 So, we went on holiday to Scarborough, 144 00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:20,440 to this, caravan park. 145 00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:23,256 And there was this woman, 146 00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:25,496 cos they had this restaurant, 147 00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:28,336 well, it was, like, a cafe thing, and she worked there. 148 00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:29,976 Patricia. Patricia. 149 00:08:30,000 --> 00:08:33,096 Yeah, listen, it had just been a long time since anyone fancied me, 150 00:08:33,120 --> 00:08:35,536 and Patricia, she was, like, she was looking, you know? 151 00:08:35,560 --> 00:08:38,216 And I kinda, well, to be fair, I was puzzled. 152 00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:40,440 Get to the point. Well, I slept with her. 153 00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:49,336 And just one night, they had this barbecue, and... 154 00:08:49,360 --> 00:08:51,616 Marie... found out. 155 00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:55,096 And kaboom, you know, that was it. 156 00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:56,576 Never forgiven. 157 00:08:56,600 --> 00:08:57,856 To this day. 158 00:08:57,880 --> 00:08:59,856 And I mean never, ever forgiven. 159 00:08:59,880 --> 00:09:01,920 I mean never. 160 00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:08,336 And I've paid the price for that to this sodding day, I have. 161 00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:10,776 How did she find out? 162 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:14,056 Um, well, I told her. 163 00:09:14,080 --> 00:09:17,856 Well, what did you do that for? 164 00:09:17,880 --> 00:09:20,280 I've learnt my lesson now, haven't I? 165 00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:23,960 So, you won't tell her next time? 166 00:09:27,560 --> 00:09:28,880 No. 167 00:09:32,720 --> 00:09:35,176 There's a little Italian, Barlow Moor Road. 168 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:39,016 Friday night, they do two courses for 15 quid. 169 00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:40,360 Fancy it? 170 00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:02,440 Right, I'm off. Tell Stewart I said hello. 171 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:08,840 MUSIC PICKS UP 172 00:10:11,560 --> 00:10:12,760 Hey. 173 00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:51,240 Clive, yeah? 174 00:10:53,400 --> 00:10:54,800 All right, down here. 175 00:10:56,760 --> 00:10:58,560 LADY SPEAKS ON SPEAKER PHONE 176 00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:05,320 THEY SPEAK IN THEIR LANGUAGE 177 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,016 Oh, you don't mind, do you? 178 00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:11,176 No, go for it. 179 00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:13,656 Yeah. It's my girlfriend. HE LAUGHS. 180 00:11:13,680 --> 00:11:16,376 She's got a new job. She's very excited. 181 00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:20,800 THEY SPEAK IN THEIR LANGUAGE 182 00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:24,616 WOMAN IN ENGLISH: Oh, thank you. 183 00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:26,576 She says thanks. HE LAUGHS. 184 00:11:26,600 --> 00:11:28,360 THEY SPEAK IN THEIR LANGUAGE 185 00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:55,160 CONVERSATION FADES 186 00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:41,856 We're not allowed to take tips. 187 00:12:41,880 --> 00:12:43,120 Buy her something. 188 00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:46,456 Thank you very much. 189 00:12:46,480 --> 00:12:48,816 He gave me £10, you know. For you. 190 00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:53,096 PHONE: Oh, that's so nice of him. Thank you! 191 00:12:53,120 --> 00:12:54,480 Yeah, nice guy, ain't he? 192 00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:03,000 LAUGHTER 193 00:13:08,280 --> 00:13:10,976 Well, you didn't stand me up. 194 00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:12,000 That's a good sign. 195 00:13:13,600 --> 00:13:16,016 You look smart. 196 00:13:16,040 --> 00:13:18,136 I was gonna make a bit more of an effort, 197 00:13:18,160 --> 00:13:21,176 but, Christine phoned just as I got in and I said, 198 00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:22,776 "Not now, Christine," but she wouldn't stop. 199 00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:26,376 Right, cos I wanted to say, 200 00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:30,816 I think I should make it clear that there's not gonna be any sex, 201 00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:33,136 you know, so... 202 00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:35,056 Who said there was? No one. 203 00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:37,360 There's not. Let me sit down, for fuck's sake. 204 00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:45,896 I just think I should explain. 205 00:13:45,920 --> 00:13:49,776 Um, because with Patricia, that was the woman in the caravan park. 206 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:51,136 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know who she is. 207 00:13:51,160 --> 00:13:52,880 Yeah, well, I didn't sleep with her. 208 00:13:56,640 --> 00:13:58,496 OK. I mean, there was a moment, you know. 209 00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:01,296 I mean, she was... she was looking, all the time. 210 00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:02,736 I mean, Marie noticed, she said, 211 00:14:02,760 --> 00:14:04,416 "Look, she's looking," and, 212 00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:05,816 and there was this big barbecue thing, 213 00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:07,096 but I didn't... 214 00:14:07,120 --> 00:14:10,096 Nothing happened, we... 215 00:14:10,120 --> 00:14:12,896 did not. 216 00:14:12,920 --> 00:14:14,896 And what do you want, eh? A medal? 217 00:14:14,920 --> 00:14:17,256 I just think you should know, that's all. 218 00:14:17,280 --> 00:14:18,640 Then why did you say you did? 219 00:14:22,960 --> 00:14:25,576 Because it would make her cross. 220 00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:26,616 Who? Marie. 221 00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:27,816 Your wife? Yeah. 222 00:14:27,840 --> 00:14:28,840 Hang on. 223 00:14:29,920 --> 00:14:32,456 You didn't just tell me you slept with Patricia, 224 00:14:32,480 --> 00:14:35,976 you told your wife you slept with Patricia, when you didn't. 225 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:38,296 Yeah. So, you made it all up? 226 00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:40,816 You lied to your wife? For how long? 227 00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:44,136 Well, you know, six years. 228 00:14:44,160 --> 00:14:47,800 She's been punishing you for six years for nothing? 229 00:14:49,240 --> 00:14:50,296 Does she know now? 230 00:14:50,320 --> 00:14:52,576 Have you told her? Does she know the truth? 231 00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:53,736 No. 232 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:55,856 Jesus Christ, Clive. 233 00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:58,016 I mean, Jesus Christ. 234 00:14:58,040 --> 00:15:00,136 Why did you lie in the first place? 235 00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:02,936 Because... 236 00:15:02,960 --> 00:15:07,296 I thought it would make me look, um... 237 00:15:07,320 --> 00:15:08,440 What? 238 00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:12,800 Sexy. 239 00:15:23,320 --> 00:15:26,936 Well, I will say, 240 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:30,080 it was the most interesting thing about you. 241 00:15:31,160 --> 00:15:33,096 Don't say anything. 242 00:15:33,120 --> 00:15:36,256 Don't make a fuss. 243 00:15:36,280 --> 00:15:37,520 Don't do that to me. 244 00:16:34,680 --> 00:16:37,176 So, what happened? 245 00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:39,760 Just, nothing much. 246 00:16:41,560 --> 00:16:44,296 Stewart's really boring since he got that job and, 247 00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:46,000 Brody's got work tomorrow, so... 248 00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:50,536 Where are the boys? 249 00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:54,296 Out. 250 00:16:54,320 --> 00:16:55,960 Still? 251 00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:01,080 Friday night. 252 00:17:20,720 --> 00:17:21,960 I was thinking, the boys... 253 00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:25,976 We said we'd wait 'til they were old enough and then split up, 254 00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:28,496 but it's not gonna work, is it? 255 00:17:28,520 --> 00:17:30,696 We can't afford it, Clive. 256 00:17:30,720 --> 00:17:33,296 Either I leave, or you leave, 257 00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:36,336 and I can't afford a flat, can you? 258 00:17:36,360 --> 00:17:38,256 I'm trying to get more work, aren't I? 259 00:17:38,280 --> 00:17:39,936 I'm not having a go. 260 00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:41,120 Then what? 261 00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:49,496 Well, it could be years till the boys leave home. 262 00:17:49,520 --> 00:17:50,776 Saul's showing no sign, 263 00:17:50,800 --> 00:17:52,696 and even if George goes to university, 264 00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:57,456 they go, and then they come back. That's what happens these days. 265 00:17:57,480 --> 00:17:59,896 So? 266 00:17:59,920 --> 00:18:06,600 So, I'm saying that we stay like this, living here, it's not so bad. 267 00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:11,000 Well, I don't think it's bad at all. 268 00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:16,960 Well, it is, if you don't mind my saying so. 269 00:18:18,960 --> 00:18:21,576 But if we accept it, and all right, yes, 270 00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:26,520 OK, I will stop having a go at you, then we'd be OK. 271 00:18:28,320 --> 00:18:30,520 We could stop pretending. 272 00:18:32,360 --> 00:18:33,760 At what? 273 00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:37,976 This. 274 00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:40,240 We could stop this. 275 00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:44,320 OK. Yeah. 276 00:18:45,880 --> 00:18:47,216 It's about time. 277 00:18:47,240 --> 00:18:48,456 Is it? 278 00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:50,360 I don't need it, I'm fine. 279 00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:55,416 And I know men like to have their little bit of fun, 280 00:18:55,440 --> 00:18:57,896 God knows you're proof of that, 281 00:18:57,920 --> 00:18:59,696 but you could finish yourself off. 282 00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:01,616 You do it anyway. 283 00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:03,176 If you're 20 minutes in the bathroom, 284 00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:04,816 the boys say you're having a wank. 285 00:19:04,840 --> 00:19:06,496 Jesus. Well, aren't you? 286 00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:07,840 Marie. 287 00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:15,616 I just think it would help if we stop planning 288 00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:18,040 for things that are never gonna happen. 289 00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:21,640 Cos I dream of it, Clive. 290 00:19:23,200 --> 00:19:25,160 Little flat all on my own... 291 00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,240 tiny little garden... 292 00:19:29,720 --> 00:19:31,856 window in the sunlight 293 00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:34,480 so Mum can come and sit with me. 294 00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:39,840 It's never gonna happen, is it? 295 00:19:44,480 --> 00:19:47,440 So, what, we just stay like this forever, do we? 296 00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:56,480 Well, one of us will die, in the end. 297 00:21:02,960 --> 00:21:04,416 You in tonight? 298 00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:05,896 Fuck's it matter to you? 299 00:21:05,920 --> 00:21:07,080 All right, I'm just... 300 00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:15,256 How's your project? 301 00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:16,296 What project? 302 00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:19,176 American civil rights. What grade did you get? 303 00:21:19,200 --> 00:21:22,200 Dunno. Well, you do know, come on. What grade did you get? 304 00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:24,760 A B. 305 00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:29,536 Oh. Can't you work a bit harder? 306 00:21:29,560 --> 00:21:32,616 What did you get in school then? No, go on. What grade did you get? 307 00:21:32,640 --> 00:21:36,816 All right. So, tell me about it. About what? 308 00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:38,776 American civil rights. 309 00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:41,056 You're kidding. Yeah, come on, educate me. 310 00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:42,096 What for? 311 00:21:42,120 --> 00:21:44,080 Cos I wanna know. Yeah, but what for? 312 00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:48,016 Cos your mum thinks we should talk more, 313 00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:50,000 but she doesn't see it - 314 00:21:53,640 --> 00:21:57,776 fucking insolence on your face when you talk to me. 315 00:21:57,800 --> 00:21:59,400 DOORBELL 316 00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:09,296 Aye, aye. Sorry, I know. I've locked myself out. 317 00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:14,216 I was just putting something in the bin and then, click. 318 00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:15,656 Go on, give us your key then. 319 00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:17,096 You said you had a spare key, 320 00:22:17,120 --> 00:22:18,896 you might as well give it to me, mightn't you? 321 00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:20,576 What's your alarm code? 322 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:23,096 Er, OK. 1502. 323 00:22:23,120 --> 00:22:26,656 1502. Remember George. 1502. 324 00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:28,576 God, he's got a nice life next door, 325 00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:30,656 hasn't he? Swanning around all hours. 326 00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:32,016 What've you done now? 327 00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:33,336 His key. Like when his alarm went 328 00:22:33,360 --> 00:22:34,816 off last time when he was on holiday, 329 00:22:34,840 --> 00:22:37,776 now we won't have to put up with it. 330 00:22:37,800 --> 00:22:39,176 What was it? 331 00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:41,120 1502.1502. 332 00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:44,040 That's his alarm. 333 00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:56,960 DOOR SLAMS 334 00:24:37,960 --> 00:24:39,536 TV: They use titanium in the engine 335 00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:41,416 and the bonnet is carbon fibre, 336 00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:43,536 and the whole thing feels so light, 337 00:24:43,560 --> 00:24:45,536 it's like a stiff breeze could blow it away, 338 00:24:45,560 --> 00:24:48,656 except it grips like crazy. 339 00:24:48,680 --> 00:24:50,936 The traction control is astonishing. 340 00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:53,256 It can detect wheels pin in a microsecond. 341 00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:54,696 Less than a microsecond. 342 00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:57,656 It almost detects a spin before it's even happened. 343 00:24:57,680 --> 00:25:01,000 I've never felt safer. I've never felt more secure. 344 00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:25,456 What are you doing in his house? George? 345 00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:27,176 Hey, answer me. What are you doing in here? 346 00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:28,656 I said there was someone in this house. 347 00:25:28,680 --> 00:25:30,176 I said so! He's been using the key. 348 00:25:30,200 --> 00:25:31,776 What do you mean? Did you know he was here? 349 00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:33,576 Did I fuck! But I knew there was someone in this house. 350 00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:34,696 He's been drinking my wine. 351 00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:36,096 The level on the wine goes down every day. 352 00:25:36,120 --> 00:25:38,496 Why are you talking about wine? What's wine got to do with it? 353 00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:40,976 No, you don't. Don't try to get away with this. 354 00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:42,576 Don't you touch him? He's in my house! 355 00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:43,816 Don't you fucking dare? 356 00:25:43,840 --> 00:25:45,216 HE'S IN MY HOUSE! 357 00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:49,696 I gave you my key, which he's gone and stolen. 358 00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:51,096 Did you say he was in here every day? Yeah. 359 00:25:51,120 --> 00:25:52,376 Drinking wine every single day? 360 00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:54,136 Yeah, and God knows what else, because your son... 361 00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:55,400 Is he drinking wine with you? 362 00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:58,256 What? 363 00:25:58,280 --> 00:25:59,800 Fuck! 364 00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:02,960 George! 365 00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:06,736 George. Get here. 366 00:26:06,760 --> 00:26:08,280 Eh! 367 00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:12,936 Don't lock me out. 368 00:26:12,960 --> 00:26:17,456 Your son has been wanking in my house. 369 00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:18,680 George! 370 00:26:22,280 --> 00:26:24,360 Oh, God! Don't kill him! 371 00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:29,976 Tell me, what you doing in that man's house? 372 00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:32,096 What were you doing in his house? Did he invite you in? 373 00:26:32,120 --> 00:26:34,256 What's that supposed to mean? Did he invite you? 374 00:26:34,280 --> 00:26:35,416 BANGING ON DOOR 375 00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:36,936 Clive! Open the door! Your boyfriend wants you. 376 00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:38,096 Don't be so stupid. 377 00:26:38,120 --> 00:26:39,456 Oh, I'm always the stupid one, aren't I? 378 00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:40,816 Clive, open the door! 379 00:26:40,840 --> 00:26:41,936 BANGING CONTINUES 380 00:26:41,960 --> 00:26:44,000 Clive, open the door! 381 00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:47,296 God, you couldn't leave him alone, eh? 382 00:26:47,320 --> 00:26:48,936 OK, this is all a bit out of control. 383 00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:51,336 We can sort it out. I just want to see George. 384 00:26:51,360 --> 00:26:53,576 I just want to talk him, like adults, OK? 385 00:26:53,600 --> 00:26:56,056 And I want my key, because you were in charge of it, Clive, 386 00:26:56,080 --> 00:26:57,376 and I want it back. 387 00:26:57,400 --> 00:26:58,616 I'm sorry, all right? 388 00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:00,400 George, don't you dare! 389 00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:03,896 Get here! 390 00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:07,656 Hey! George, get back here! 391 00:27:07,680 --> 00:27:08,840 Hey! 392 00:27:12,360 --> 00:27:14,440 You'll have to come back in the end. 393 00:27:25,320 --> 00:27:27,576 He needs a bollocking, because, you know, 394 00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:30,400 I mean, we all make mistakes, but he has crossed a line here. 395 00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:36,856 What was he doing in your house? 396 00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:39,216 What was my boy doing in your house, 397 00:27:39,240 --> 00:27:41,120 for days and days? 398 00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:43,896 He's 16 years old. 399 00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:46,560 WOMAN'S VOICE: OK, see you later, then. Bye. 400 00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:53,376 Your son George... Don't! 401 00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:57,240 Your son George stole my key and waited till I left. 402 00:27:58,680 --> 00:28:00,776 Because if I knew he was there, 403 00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:06,040 why the fuck would I walk up to my front door with you? 404 00:28:08,280 --> 00:28:09,736 No, no, no, no, no, wait. 405 00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:12,336 So he was breaking and entering, 406 00:28:12,360 --> 00:28:13,496 he stole things, 407 00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:16,616 he masturbated in front of my television, 408 00:28:16,640 --> 00:28:18,416 and these are all on the list of things I am telling 409 00:28:18,440 --> 00:28:21,360 the police, including your assault of me. 410 00:28:22,840 --> 00:28:26,360 Because if you're gonna take on this fucking poof... 411 00:28:31,560 --> 00:28:32,760 don't you... 412 00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:36,000 don't you say... 413 00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:40,480 Don't you ever! 414 00:28:50,640 --> 00:28:52,456 Jesus! Fuck! 415 00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:54,256 Aghhh! 416 00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:55,856 What? 417 00:28:55,880 --> 00:28:57,640 What...? 418 00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:13,616 Boss? Judy, tell Saul to pack his stuff up and get out. 419 00:29:13,640 --> 00:29:16,616 You will not believe what his father has just done! 420 00:29:16,640 --> 00:29:18,016 You're a beautiful lad, Saul, 421 00:29:18,040 --> 00:29:20,656 but I'm afraid you've gotta go. And if you wanna know why, 422 00:29:20,680 --> 00:29:21,936 blame your mad old dad. 423 00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:24,216 No, you need to come home. They said Dad went crazy. 424 00:29:24,240 --> 00:29:26,536 Like, George was in next door's house. 425 00:29:26,560 --> 00:29:29,576 He broke in and he was stark naked. 426 00:29:29,600 --> 00:29:31,656 Bushra, I've got to go. So, where's George now? 427 00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:33,336 I don't know, do I? I'm still here. 428 00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:35,176 He actually attacked you? 429 00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:36,936 Yeah. 430 00:29:36,960 --> 00:29:40,056 That is assault, and you have to go to the police. 431 00:29:40,080 --> 00:29:43,456 I don't even have my car. I left it in town. I'm stuck here. 432 00:29:43,480 --> 00:29:45,416 Can you come and drive me in? 433 00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:46,840 I'm coming. 434 00:29:48,800 --> 00:29:51,896 Somebody tell me...! What the hell? 435 00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:55,696 He's gonna call the police, because you assaulted him, Clive! 436 00:29:55,720 --> 00:30:00,120 Him and snotty bitch Stephanie, they're gonna call the police. 437 00:30:02,680 --> 00:30:06,920 MUFFLED ARGUMENT 438 00:30:32,560 --> 00:30:34,336 Cheers. Cheers. 439 00:30:34,360 --> 00:30:37,016 You should have a vodka in that. 440 00:30:37,040 --> 00:30:38,496 I've gotta take the car home. 441 00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:39,736 And I'm trying to stay alert. 442 00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:42,216 I have a thief living next door, and a thug. 443 00:30:42,240 --> 00:30:44,976 Really, you should call the police though. Really, really. 444 00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:47,776 I know, I know. You should. But, like, I'm thinking of me. I mean, 445 00:30:47,800 --> 00:30:49,416 what if it got into the court? I mean, 446 00:30:49,440 --> 00:30:52,896 gay man with a 16-year-old boy in my house? What would that look like? 447 00:30:52,920 --> 00:30:55,456 He broke in. Yeah, but look at the reaction of his dad, huh? 448 00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:59,216 Anything to do with George, you know. 449 00:30:59,240 --> 00:31:02,896 Then I'm a groomer and a paedo and a pervert. Oh, don't. 450 00:31:02,920 --> 00:31:05,376 That gets online, there's five million straight men 451 00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:06,456 waiting to attack me. 452 00:31:06,480 --> 00:31:08,456 Plenty of straight women. 453 00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:10,376 What makes you say that? 454 00:31:10,400 --> 00:31:11,816 The world. 455 00:31:11,840 --> 00:31:13,256 And you know who would love this story? 456 00:31:13,280 --> 00:31:16,376 The Licensing Unit. Oh, the council would leap on it, 457 00:31:16,400 --> 00:31:18,496 then this place would be in trouble. 458 00:31:18,520 --> 00:31:21,200 If I go to the police, it will only get worse. 459 00:31:23,680 --> 00:31:25,456 To be fair to little George, 460 00:31:25,480 --> 00:31:27,816 he did just want a safe place to wank. 461 00:31:27,840 --> 00:31:29,496 Because men will do it anywhere. 462 00:31:29,520 --> 00:31:30,776 I've been studying this for years, 463 00:31:30,800 --> 00:31:33,176 it's my specialist subject. And I have gotta tell you, 464 00:31:33,200 --> 00:31:35,976 girls, men will do it everywhere, all day long. 465 00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:38,096 You name it, they have spunked on it. 466 00:31:38,120 --> 00:31:41,216 Cinema seats, theatres, graveyards, 467 00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:42,896 cars. Every single car, 468 00:31:42,920 --> 00:31:45,576 they've whacked off into every single seat. 469 00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:48,776 I used to carry a handkerchief to wipe down seats on the bus, 470 00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:52,736 I'm now considering a beekeeper's outfit. Aeroplanes. 471 00:31:52,760 --> 00:31:55,696 In the seats, the dirty dogs! 472 00:31:55,720 --> 00:31:57,296 Seats, toilets, cockpits. 473 00:31:57,320 --> 00:31:59,976 That's what turbulence is! 474 00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:03,416 I am telling you, they have been fiddling away all through history. 475 00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:06,016 You ask Sir Edmund Hilary if he tugged off on 476 00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:07,256 the top of Everest, 477 00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:08,976 and he would say, yes... 478 00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:10,776 BOTH: because it was there.! 479 00:32:10,800 --> 00:32:13,656 Christopher Columbus, he discovered America so he could find a new place 480 00:32:13,680 --> 00:32:15,576 to whack it out. 481 00:32:15,600 --> 00:32:17,376 Neil Armstrong, one small step, 482 00:32:17,400 --> 00:32:19,096 one massive wank. 483 00:32:19,120 --> 00:32:21,176 And then he varnished the Moon. 484 00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:26,056 I'm telling you, two basic rules. One, never sit down, 485 00:32:26,080 --> 00:32:28,256 and two, don't go barefoot, 486 00:32:28,280 --> 00:32:31,336 cos we are standing on a carpet of glue, 487 00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:34,056 and if we could see life through UV glasses, 488 00:32:34,080 --> 00:32:37,136 the whole world would look like a melted candle. 489 00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:39,096 Ooh. Fair do's to George! 490 00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:41,456 He was maintaining a fine tradition. 491 00:32:41,480 --> 00:32:43,880 To George. ALL: To George! 492 00:32:47,440 --> 00:32:49,720 He was round at Sammy's. 493 00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:52,760 Hiding like a chicken. 494 00:32:55,040 --> 00:32:57,776 You're supposed to be the clever one. 495 00:32:57,800 --> 00:33:01,296 But if Leo presses charges and you get a criminal record, 496 00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:04,856 you won't get into university. 497 00:33:04,880 --> 00:33:07,496 That's not true, actually. Sherry from down the road, 498 00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:08,896 she got caught shoplifting, 499 00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:11,496 and now she's doing economics. 500 00:33:11,520 --> 00:33:13,536 Which is funny, if you think about it. 501 00:33:13,560 --> 00:33:17,256 Thank you. Now, button it. 502 00:33:17,280 --> 00:33:20,216 You will go and apologise. 503 00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:22,096 You'll apologise in person, 504 00:33:22,120 --> 00:33:24,896 and I want you to write him a letter. Fuck off! 505 00:33:24,920 --> 00:33:26,480 Don't you dare! 506 00:33:28,080 --> 00:33:31,256 You'll write a formal apology. 507 00:33:31,280 --> 00:33:33,376 Plus you can add up how much you owe him with all 508 00:33:33,400 --> 00:33:35,736 the wine and stuff, then double it and pay him back, 509 00:33:35,760 --> 00:33:38,040 and then... and then... 510 00:33:48,120 --> 00:33:50,680 Then you can tell us why you did it. 511 00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:55,080 I mean, I'm not stupid, I get it, OK? 512 00:33:56,400 --> 00:33:58,776 When I was a kid, I had a key to my nan's, 513 00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:00,776 and I would bunk off 514 00:34:00,800 --> 00:34:03,896 and sit in her flat when she was out on Thursday afternoons, 515 00:34:03,920 --> 00:34:06,776 and I did that for five years, and no-one knew a thing. 516 00:34:06,800 --> 00:34:08,256 But that was family. 517 00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:10,160 He's the man next door. 518 00:34:11,480 --> 00:34:12,776 Did he ask you in? Shut up. 519 00:34:12,800 --> 00:34:14,736 He gave us his key, didn't he? It's an open door. 520 00:34:14,760 --> 00:34:18,936 And... and you're too young to know when you're being, like, seduced. 521 00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:20,440 Don't be so stupid! 522 00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:23,560 It's a good point. 523 00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:29,336 Cos Leo is a bit out there. 524 00:34:29,360 --> 00:34:32,976 He's a bit obvious. And if he does call the police, 525 00:34:33,000 --> 00:34:36,136 it would be a good line to take in court. 526 00:34:36,160 --> 00:34:39,296 He's a homosexual man choosing 527 00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:42,440 to live ten feet away from two healthy lads. 528 00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:45,000 Two healthy... 529 00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:49,176 sexy lads, let's say it. 530 00:34:49,200 --> 00:34:51,696 He looks at me sometimes. Does he? 531 00:34:51,720 --> 00:34:54,176 I catch him, now and then, 532 00:34:54,200 --> 00:34:57,776 eyeing me up. He can't help himself. 533 00:34:57,800 --> 00:34:59,096 Well, that could be useful. 534 00:34:59,120 --> 00:35:01,256 God, you are just idiots! 535 00:35:01,280 --> 00:35:03,976 Do you know why I went there? 536 00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:06,256 To get away from you lot! 537 00:35:06,280 --> 00:35:08,296 To get away from this house! 538 00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:10,480 To get away from you! 539 00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:13,936 Well, you're grounded. 540 00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:17,096 And don't think you can go round to Hassan's, 541 00:35:17,120 --> 00:35:19,216 because I'm phoning his mother. I warn you, George. 542 00:35:19,240 --> 00:35:21,016 She'll send you right back. 543 00:35:21,040 --> 00:35:22,200 Have you got that? 544 00:35:29,480 --> 00:35:30,656 I tell you what, darling, 545 00:35:30,680 --> 00:35:32,816 you'd better get your locks changed. 546 00:35:32,840 --> 00:35:35,016 Might be wise, just in case. 547 00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:38,576 Such a hassle. Oh, God, I've got the key safe, too. 548 00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:40,360 I'll have to change everything. 549 00:35:44,280 --> 00:35:46,560 ALARM BEEPS 550 00:35:48,640 --> 00:35:50,960 BEEPING STOPS 551 00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:54,296 POP MUSIC STARTS 552 00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:56,000 MUSIC STOPS 553 00:37:29,360 --> 00:37:33,816 Do you think he went through your things, little Georgy Porgy? 554 00:37:33,840 --> 00:37:34,936 What, like my pants? 555 00:37:34,960 --> 00:37:36,776 Mm. I would. 556 00:37:36,800 --> 00:37:38,456 Oh, God! Do you think he did? 557 00:37:38,480 --> 00:37:40,560 Why? What would he find? 558 00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:15,416 Boss, I was thinking, did you check your computer? 559 00:38:15,440 --> 00:38:17,840 No, it's good, it's locked, it's got a password. 560 00:38:19,040 --> 00:38:21,760 Although if I leave the email open, it stays unlocked. 561 00:38:34,360 --> 00:38:35,600 NOTIFICATION TONE 562 00:38:53,640 --> 00:38:55,496 I'll tell you one thing bothering me. 563 00:38:55,520 --> 00:38:57,336 That night you were texting George. 564 00:38:57,360 --> 00:38:59,536 So? I was being kind. 565 00:38:59,560 --> 00:39:00,856 Yeah, I know, 566 00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:02,216 but if his mum and dad demand 567 00:39:02,240 --> 00:39:04,496 to know everything and George shows it to them. 568 00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:07,416 But I said nice things. 569 00:39:07,440 --> 00:39:09,776 Oh, God, I left a voice note. 570 00:39:09,800 --> 00:39:12,416 George, I swear, if you tell your girlfriends about this, 571 00:39:12,440 --> 00:39:15,096 they will tell you that every single stupid boy does this 572 00:39:15,120 --> 00:39:17,456 and you'll laugh about it. 573 00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:19,376 Because there's such a big world out there, 574 00:39:19,400 --> 00:39:21,296 and you can have boyfriends or girlfriends, 575 00:39:21,320 --> 00:39:22,816 or whatever you like. 576 00:39:22,840 --> 00:39:27,456 You can have all the wild and crazy hot sex you want, 577 00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:30,336 night after night. Because I promise you Geroge, 578 00:39:30,360 --> 00:39:36,080 there's a great big gay life, just waiting for you. 579 00:39:46,920 --> 00:39:49,496 So, if I delete it, will it delete on George's thread? 580 00:39:49,520 --> 00:39:51,800 Yes. Now, get rid of it. 581 00:39:55,560 --> 00:39:56,720 Oh, shit. 582 00:40:06,440 --> 00:40:08,576 Boss, I sent you that password generator. It's free 583 00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:10,096 and it's brilliant. Thanks, Mikey. 584 00:40:10,120 --> 00:40:12,296 Oh, well, you weren't so helpful this afternoon, were you? 585 00:40:12,320 --> 00:40:14,136 I was pointing out the obvious. 586 00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:16,536 What? He posted Saul's wanking video on the group chat. 587 00:40:16,560 --> 00:40:19,120 Oh, yeah. What? Saul the other son? 588 00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:29,320 SAUL PANTS AND GASPS 589 00:40:30,360 --> 00:40:32,896 He gets it all out online. Saul bares all. 590 00:40:32,920 --> 00:40:35,840 It's ten out of ten, and I mean ten. 591 00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:44,016 It's not private, it's a business, 592 00:40:44,040 --> 00:40:45,456 and he chooses to promote himself. 593 00:40:45,480 --> 00:40:48,416 It's not even up for debate. He's your neighbour's son. 594 00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:49,456 He's 25. 595 00:40:49,480 --> 00:40:51,536 He's only 25. 596 00:40:51,560 --> 00:40:53,616 He sells it, he wants us to see. 597 00:40:53,640 --> 00:40:54,896 Is that on your phone? 598 00:40:54,920 --> 00:40:57,096 It's on everyone's. Well, then you should delete it. 599 00:40:57,120 --> 00:40:58,656 If I end up taking Clive Goss to court, 600 00:40:58,680 --> 00:41:01,096 the behaviour of his son could be very good evidence. 601 00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:03,936 Leo, just don't have it anywhere. 602 00:41:03,960 --> 00:41:06,016 Come on, it's not like I fancy him 603 00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:07,936 or anything. Well, not much. 604 00:41:07,960 --> 00:41:09,680 Oh, God! 605 00:41:10,760 --> 00:41:13,200 I'll delete it. I'll delete it. 606 00:41:21,800 --> 00:41:23,536 This is what they do. MESSAGE PINGS. 607 00:41:23,560 --> 00:41:26,216 They make a link between gay men and children... 608 00:41:26,240 --> 00:41:28,656 MESSAGE PINGS and that link is ineradicable. 609 00:41:28,680 --> 00:41:30,256 It cannot be removed. MESSAGE PINGS. 610 00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:32,736 And they know that, the bastards. MESSAGE PINGS. 611 00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:35,136 So, they repeat it, they shout it... MESSAGE PINGS 612 00:41:35,160 --> 00:41:37,496 over and over, and louder and louder. 613 00:41:37,520 --> 00:41:39,136 Well, that's nice. Thanks, boss. 614 00:41:39,160 --> 00:41:40,616 What did we do to deserve that? 615 00:41:40,640 --> 00:41:42,016 What do you mean? 616 00:41:42,040 --> 00:41:43,616 Your message, on the group chat. 617 00:41:43,640 --> 00:41:45,136 Guilty as charged. 618 00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:46,976 That's on my CV, Mr Struthers. 619 00:41:47,000 --> 00:41:48,176 What? What's just happened? 620 00:41:48,200 --> 00:41:49,816 He's just called us all perverts. 621 00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:51,336 I didn't say that. Look. 622 00:41:51,360 --> 00:41:53,480 WHOOPS AND CHEERS Why would I do that? 623 00:41:54,520 --> 00:41:56,496 Look, look, there's the time. That's now. 624 00:41:56,520 --> 00:41:58,256 12 minutes past, right now. And you saw me, 625 00:41:58,280 --> 00:41:59,736 I was sitting here. I didn't send it. 626 00:41:59,760 --> 00:42:02,296 You must've been on dictation. You must've pressed it by mistake. 627 00:42:02,320 --> 00:42:04,616 You did say perverts out loud. 628 00:42:04,640 --> 00:42:06,496 But it's not that bad, Melba. 629 00:42:06,520 --> 00:42:07,816 I've got this couple in Levenshulme, 630 00:42:07,840 --> 00:42:10,936 Blake and Robbie, they've just adopted three children. 631 00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:13,216 They'd never have been able to do that back in the day, 632 00:42:13,240 --> 00:42:15,280 so things are better. 633 00:42:36,520 --> 00:42:37,616 Ohhh! 634 00:42:37,640 --> 00:42:39,040 PHONE BUZZES 635 00:43:12,920 --> 00:43:15,840 All right, you lot, got a surprise for you today. 636 00:43:19,040 --> 00:43:20,776 I love my job, man! 637 00:43:20,800 --> 00:43:21,896 Say hi, Molly. 638 00:43:21,920 --> 00:43:23,176 Hi! 639 00:43:23,200 --> 00:43:25,656 How hot, is she? Oh, my God! 640 00:43:25,680 --> 00:43:27,160 Here we go. 641 00:43:46,960 --> 00:43:48,760 This is for you, girls. 642 00:43:49,840 --> 00:43:51,880 And some of you fellas. 643 00:43:55,560 --> 00:43:57,120 Uhhh! 644 00:44:28,560 --> 00:44:31,776 OK, it's been a long day. 645 00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:35,216 Good luck, troops. Keep flying the flag. 646 00:44:35,240 --> 00:44:37,616 Seriously, though, be careful. 647 00:44:37,640 --> 00:44:39,336 What now? 648 00:44:39,360 --> 00:44:41,976 Your phone! Texting a teenager! 649 00:44:42,000 --> 00:44:44,456 Oi, I didn't do anything wrong. 650 00:44:44,480 --> 00:44:47,096 There's nothing like that on my phone, Leo. 651 00:44:47,120 --> 00:44:51,216 Sometimes I think you lot are so full of all your freedoms, 652 00:44:51,240 --> 00:44:52,960 you don't know when to stop. 653 00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:06,720 Aghhh! 654 00:45:20,320 --> 00:45:25,200 MUSIC: Ever Fallen in Love (With Someone You Shouldn't've) by Buzzcocks. 655 00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:33,456 ♪ You spurn my natural emotions 656 00:45:33,480 --> 00:45:38,640 ♪ You make me feel I'm dirt, and I'm hurt 657 00:45:41,680 --> 00:45:43,976 ♪ And if I start a commotion 658 00:45:44,000 --> 00:45:48,360 ♪ I run the risk of losing you And that's worse... ♪ 659 00:45:58,080 --> 00:46:01,440 Is this you? Is this your lot? 660 00:46:03,640 --> 00:46:06,640 MUSIC CONTINUES FAINTLY 661 00:46:15,280 --> 00:46:18,776 ♪ Ever fallen in love with someone? Ever fallen in love? 662 00:46:18,800 --> 00:46:21,920 ♪ In love with someone Ever fallen in love... ♪ 663 00:46:24,560 --> 00:46:27,560 Subtitles by Red Bee Media 47826

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