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[upbeat music playing]
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[woman directing indistinctly]
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In three, two…
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♪Let's go ♪
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Welcome to The Ultimatum: Queer Love
Season 2 Reunion.
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I'm JoAnna Garcia Swisher.
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It has been one year
since the Ultimatum came to term.
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And today, we are diving in
to find out what has unfolded
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since the big decision.
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Have any of the couples tied the knot?
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Had a change of heart? Faced any regrets?
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Everyone is back,
and nothing is off the table.
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♪ Boom, I'm shaking up ♪
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♪ Shake, shake, shake ♪
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♪ For the win, winTwist and shout ♪
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♪ Time to shake it up ♪
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♪ Boom, I'm shaking up ♪
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♪ Shake, shake, shake ♪
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♪ Watch me shake itIce in my cup, shake it up ♪
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♪ Wildfire! ♪
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[Britney] Hi!
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♪ Can you feel the power? ♪
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-[JoAnna] You're like a mermaid.
-[Marita giggles]
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[Mel] Hey, Ashley.
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♪ Ice in my cupShake it up ♪
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[JoAnna] You all look amazing.
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-[woman] You too.
-[JoAnna] Thank you.
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This season ended in an unprecedented
five out of six couples
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taking the leap and getting engaged.
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I can't wait to hear how things are going.
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You have to remember, it has been a year.
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[Magan] We're looking back at it,
and it's just like, a lot did happen.
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We leaned into it.
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We all had deep, meaningful connections.
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Absolutely.
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We really appreciate
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-the growth that we had with one another.
-[Dayna] Yeah.
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I went into this thinking
nothing could break us up,
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and I almost left
not knowing who Haley was.
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And now I'm like, that was a year ago.
That was crazy.
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We were all in a crazy situation.
Like, shit.
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But now I'm like,
truly am rooting for everyone.
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And like, maybe we won't all be
best friends from this experience,
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but I'm not in a place
where I need to cut you or cut this,
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like what happened,
because that's just not where we're at.
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[women] Yeah.
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Okay. Let's get into it.
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Britney and AJ.
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-[AJ] Hey.
-[Britney] Hi.
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[JoAnna] Last we saw you,
you were celebrating an engagement.
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How does it feel to be an engaged couple?
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It's been awesome.
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I think we grew stronger in our love,
which was amazing.
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You know, we gained a stronger fellowship
with God for ourselves.
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And then…
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Does it feel different?
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[Britney] I feel like, a bit, yeah.
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I feel like we've developed a sense where
we're just more in tune with each other,
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more attentive to each other,
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and everything that we both learned
during our Ultimatum experience,
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we've been applying it to our real lives.
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-Yes.
-I've learned work-life balance.
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-[JoAnna] Okay.
-[Britney] And being attentive to my baby.
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-[JoAnna] I love that.
-[Britney] It's been great.
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Watching your love story just grow,
I felt like it was really heartwarming,
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especially because it felt like
you guys had these incredible realizations
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and you really met each other
in such a great place.
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If I'm being real honest and frank here,
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I think some of that
I have to attest to Marita,
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because Marita actually let me know,
"If it would be the business or you,
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she would choose you every time."
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And Marita opened my eyes
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to understand that Britney is
doing this business for us…
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-[JoAnna] Yes.
-…to build a future for us.
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And Marita, you know I always tell you
I'm so grateful for you
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because I don't think I'd be sitting here
together on this couch
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with the love of my life
if it wasn't for you.
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[Marita] I appreciate you saying that.
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I would also say it was more
than just us being friends.
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We emotionally connected
on such a deep level
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that helped us both grow.
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And I think that
that's part of the experience.
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I love hearing that it is about
building together and dreaming together.
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That's what creates that unbreakable bond.
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Absolutely.
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I had to make sure she got right
because the ring I got her before
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wasn't what it needed to be.
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I definitely upgraded
because I appreciate it.
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Let me see it. Oh, my Lord. Okay. Yes.
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[laughing]
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-[AJ] Definitely had to give an upgrade.
-Yes, you did.
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AJ, we learned a lot about you
through this experience.
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And oftentimes, it was narrated by you.
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-So let's take a look.
-[AJ] Oh God.
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Just ready to put single AJ to the test
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and see what kind of AJ
we're going to get.
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[laughing]
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Everybody has something to give AJ.
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And I don't know what it is
that AJ may need.
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People got a little piece of AJ
and liked it.
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-[Marie laughs] She's so cute.
-[AJ] I don't know who this AJ is.
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We could be talking
to a whole different AJ right now.
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[exaggerated gasp]
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She knows she wants to marry AJ.
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Where does that leave AJ?
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-[Bridget laughs]
-Honesty about what AJ's doing,
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and when AJ's talking
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and when AJ's asking.
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There's a lot AJ needs to work on
before maybe even thinking about marriage.
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Still.
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There's no days off for AJ.
Like, it's all the time.
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That's what makes AJ, AJ.
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-[all laughing]
-[AJ] Oh my God.
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-That was funny.
-I love that. That was hilarious.
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[JoAnna] I have a question for you.
Now that you've watched everything back,
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do you feel that AJ was
a little too forward during dating week?
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Yes. Ten out of ten.
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-[JoAnna] Ten out of ten? Okay.
-Yeah.
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Would you like to expand?
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[Ashley] Marita warned me beforehand.
"You're not gonna like our conversations."
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And then seeing how she was
speaking that way with everybody,
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like, yeah, it's a little odd to me,
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but that's just like my own mind
where I don't understand it
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'cause, like, that's not specifically
what I was here for.
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It's just like every conversation
AJ had with everybody was just,
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it was very, like, sexual.
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AJ as a person just connects
with everybody she meets.
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She's going to find the heart
in somebody that she's talking to.
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She's going to get to know them
on a personal level,
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but it's not like it was malicious.
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I feel like AJ was being AJ.
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Right.
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I was like, even from my perspective,
I feel like AJ was just being… you.
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I know who I am and what I bring
to the table and what I can bring,
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um, especially, and I know what I lack.
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I think during dating week,
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I was just trying to figure out
what it was that I needed in those times.
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There was a lot that was talked about,
a lot of deep conversations,
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a lot of romantic conversations.
There was a lot.
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And I was trying to navigate that
the best way AJ knew how.
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-And the best way I knew how.
-[all laughing]
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-Again, here we go.
-[AJ] Again, right?
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I got to work on that.
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Um, but yeah.
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00:06:15,917 --> 00:06:17,877
Marie, during your trial marriage,
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you said that
you had never felt more alone.
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Do you think that AJ could have done more
for you as a trial wife?
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AJ did the best that AJ could.
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[JoAnna] There's nothing more to that?
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No.
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Have you stayed close with AJ
after this experience?
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No.
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I did not stay close.
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I'm sad a little bit though.
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[Marie] You don't need to be. Do not.
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I'm sad we still don't have
some type of relationship outside
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because I think I was trying
to give you space.
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Is that what you want,
a relationship outside?
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-We live down the street.
-Be my friend?
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Whoa, what's that face, Brit?
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No, I'm just like, yeah.
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-I said that to you when I saw you last.
-[AJ] Mm-hmm.
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[JoAnna] Britney, do you have
anything to say to Marie
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after watching back their trial marriage?
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Your trial marriage
started off beautifully.
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I totally understand
why you guys chose each other.
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I can see where
the switch flipped for you.
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When AJ shared that she saw me
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when I was literally losing
my freaking mind.
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So I think after that,
that's where things went downhill for you.
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What you shared with me also
at some of the cocktail parties is,
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like, that you felt like AJ
wasn't there for you. Um…
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And even when I dug a little deeper
and tried to figure out why,
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it did seem like it was
just something that
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you maybe were blaming AJ for,
when it didn't necessarily stem from her.
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Britney, watching episodes one to nine
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and seeing how much you felt
towards the situation
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that was not nearly as romantic
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truly, like, struck something with me
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because you were struggling
on your own accord
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and you had a best friend
to get through it.
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00:08:04,108 --> 00:08:07,612
As you guys saw, me and Marita ended up
with each other untraditionally,
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00:08:07,695 --> 00:08:10,448
what we mentally prepared for,
and what the show calls for.
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-[Marie] Which I'm so happy worked out.
-But are you blaming me for that?
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-Of course not. Not at all.
-[Britney] That's what it sounds like.
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If me and Marita ended up together
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and we made the best
out of our trial marriage,
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00:08:20,041 --> 00:08:22,752
what does that have to do
with your trial marriage?
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[Marie] I'm speaking on the fact
that it was a very different experience.
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Whereas I saw Mel with Dayna
versus AJ seeing you with Marita,
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00:08:30,051 --> 00:08:31,969
you can't actually see that was different?
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00:08:32,053 --> 00:08:34,055
-[Britney] I see that it's different.
-Okay.
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00:08:34,138 --> 00:08:34,972
We see that.
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00:08:35,056 --> 00:08:37,141
The fact that it's different,
I will never…
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00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:38,935
Let's say everything was reversed.
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00:08:39,018 --> 00:08:41,145
I wouldn't be mad at someone else.
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00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:43,898
-Nobody's mad.
-[Britney] Then why's it being brought up?
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00:08:43,981 --> 00:08:47,485
Because it's a conversation. It's
a reunion. That's what this is, right?
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I was taking my dog out
all the time, obviously,
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00:08:49,987 --> 00:08:53,533
and she probably felt abandoned and stuff,
and didn't have someone to talk to
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00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:56,619
'cause you two were always together,
sneaking around.
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00:08:56,702 --> 00:08:59,622
-Like, you two were always outside.
-Whoa, time out.
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00:08:59,705 --> 00:09:01,958
-[Ashley] Not being…
-[Bridget] You guys owned up to it.
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00:09:02,041 --> 00:09:05,253
I think what Marie's trying to say,
and correct me if I'm wrong.
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00:09:05,336 --> 00:09:07,880
-I don't want to speak for you.
-I'd love to correct you.
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00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:11,884
I think you're trying to get at the fact
that you were continuing to see each other
207
00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:16,055
and so you had each other,
in some way, as a support system.
208
00:09:16,138 --> 00:09:19,559
I was very transparent with Marie
about everything,
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00:09:19,642 --> 00:09:22,478
about what was going on
and what me and Britney were doing
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00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:24,522
as far as us seeing each other.
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00:09:24,605 --> 00:09:27,775
Because right now she's my priority
as my trial marriage wife,
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00:09:27,858 --> 00:09:30,111
and I asked and I said,
"Are you okay with this?"
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00:09:30,194 --> 00:09:31,487
Respect is above all.
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00:09:31,571 --> 00:09:34,991
And if you can truly empathize
on that notion, both of you,
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00:09:35,074 --> 00:09:37,577
as a couple, as a unit,
as a Mrs. and Mrs.,
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00:09:37,660 --> 00:09:39,870
if you can truly empathize on that notion,
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00:09:39,954 --> 00:09:43,207
you will fully, 100% see
where I'm coming from.
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00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:46,752
I think you're holding a grudge
or some type of anger or animosity,
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00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:48,754
whatever that word is, towards us
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00:09:48,838 --> 00:09:52,925
just because AJ saw me at a time
that I was vulnerable and needed her.
221
00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:55,303
When I'm sure you saw Mel.
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00:09:57,555 --> 00:10:01,517
-Yeah, and she didn't say hi to me.
-But that isn't our issue.
223
00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:05,271
I understand, but do you empathize
as a human to human?
224
00:10:05,354 --> 00:10:06,188
[Britney] Absolutely.
225
00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:08,482
And I'm not holding animosity to it.
226
00:10:08,566 --> 00:10:09,817
[AJ] I hated that for you.
227
00:10:09,900 --> 00:10:11,944
Like, truly. Like, that wasn't okay.
228
00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:13,863
I even told Mel that wasn't okay.
229
00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:18,034
I'm just speaking on the fact
that it was a very different experience.
230
00:10:18,117 --> 00:10:21,996
I'm not attacking anyone.
I'm speaking as clear, concise,
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00:10:22,079 --> 00:10:23,497
empathetic as possible.
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00:10:23,581 --> 00:10:25,625
I'm trying to be so soft with everybody
233
00:10:25,708 --> 00:10:27,835
because there's a lot in me right now,
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00:10:27,918 --> 00:10:30,880
which anybody who watched
episodes one to nine will understand.
235
00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:32,256
[AJ] Yes.
236
00:10:32,340 --> 00:10:35,468
I think what you went through
was extremely hard.
237
00:10:35,551 --> 00:10:38,596
If there's anything I could've done,
I pray you let me know that
238
00:10:38,679 --> 00:10:40,848
because that's the only way
I could truly grow.
239
00:10:40,931 --> 00:10:43,351
No, you did what… like, no.
240
00:10:44,352 --> 00:10:46,437
I'm grateful for what it was.
241
00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:51,525
I learned a lot…
throughout that period of time.
242
00:10:51,609 --> 00:10:55,196
But truly, wholeheartedly,
I'm happy you guys are happy.
243
00:10:56,113 --> 00:10:57,406
[JoAnna] Okay, well.
244
00:10:58,074 --> 00:10:59,825
So do you guys have a wedding date?
245
00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:02,370
-Not yet. No wedding date.
-[JoAnna laughs]
246
00:11:03,954 --> 00:11:06,082
-We think we have a city in mind.
-Yes.
247
00:11:06,165 --> 00:11:08,000
-[JoAnna] Destination. Okay.
-Yeah.
248
00:11:08,084 --> 00:11:09,502
Got to fly to be out there.
249
00:11:09,585 --> 00:11:11,879
Do they serve oxtail
wherever you're going?
250
00:11:11,962 --> 00:11:13,130
-[Britney] Oh, boy.
[AJ groans]
251
00:11:14,090 --> 00:11:15,132
Probably not.
252
00:11:15,216 --> 00:11:16,967
We've been kind of planning ideas,
253
00:11:17,051 --> 00:11:19,178
but haven't actually made plans.
254
00:11:19,261 --> 00:11:23,057
Well, enjoy that because it is
a really magical time in a relationship.
255
00:11:23,140 --> 00:11:25,184
-It's fun. I wish you the best.
-Thank you.
256
00:11:25,851 --> 00:11:29,146
Okay, let's move on to a couple
who decided to go their separate ways.
257
00:11:29,230 --> 00:11:31,148
In a unique twist of events,
258
00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:35,528
the one that issued the Ultimatum ended up
not wanting to get engaged in the end.
259
00:11:35,611 --> 00:11:37,279
Ashley and Marita.
260
00:11:37,863 --> 00:11:39,699
Marita, catch us up.
261
00:11:39,782 --> 00:11:42,410
Have you spoken to Ashley
since the experience?
262
00:11:42,493 --> 00:11:43,494
[Marita] Yeah.
263
00:11:43,577 --> 00:11:47,248
On decision day when Ashley and I split,
264
00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:51,001
I was heartbroken,
and I didn't know what to think.
265
00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:52,753
I didn't know how to feel.
266
00:11:52,837 --> 00:11:58,801
And then when we went back,
she was still kind of just using me,
267
00:11:58,884 --> 00:12:03,097
and I kicked her out,
and I told her to go back to Indiana.
268
00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:06,809
And I did break up with her,
and that was in May.
269
00:12:07,393 --> 00:12:10,855
[Ashley] Okay, for context,
we never got back together after the show.
270
00:12:10,938 --> 00:12:13,023
She was upset
'cause we didn't leave engaged.
271
00:12:13,774 --> 00:12:16,736
And we went to Key West after that.
We had a great time.
272
00:12:16,819 --> 00:12:18,195
Want to know what happened?
273
00:12:18,279 --> 00:12:21,031
-The day after…
-I can't even finish my sentences.
274
00:12:21,115 --> 00:12:24,869
…I asked the producers to get me
a hotel room because I was heartbroken.
275
00:12:24,952 --> 00:12:29,665
You asked my dad for his blessing,
and then the next time I saw you,
276
00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:30,833
you didn't propose to me.
277
00:12:30,916 --> 00:12:33,127
I was heartbroken, Ashley.
I was in love with you.
278
00:12:33,210 --> 00:12:34,420
Yeah, I mean, same.
279
00:12:34,503 --> 00:12:39,091
-I begged you the past year to be with me.
-You packed my car… to go to the Keys.
280
00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:41,427
"Because none of the show mattered."
281
00:12:41,510 --> 00:12:42,928
"All of that was for show."
282
00:12:43,012 --> 00:12:45,055
"None of that matters. I still love you."
283
00:12:45,139 --> 00:12:46,932
You know what? That's called gaslighting.
284
00:12:47,016 --> 00:12:49,935
Actually, no. I just didn't let myself
be completely myself
285
00:12:50,019 --> 00:12:51,729
because there were cameras around.
286
00:12:51,812 --> 00:12:53,147
And, like, that's just me.
287
00:12:53,230 --> 00:12:56,358
-I don't have this personality to--
-I know the truth behind you.
288
00:12:57,526 --> 00:13:01,614
Let's talk about the fact
that my grandfather… was dying.
289
00:13:01,697 --> 00:13:02,990
[Ashley sighs]
290
00:13:03,073 --> 00:13:04,867
I was home in California,
291
00:13:06,368 --> 00:13:07,745
and this one
292
00:13:08,412 --> 00:13:09,622
was cheating on me.
293
00:13:09,705 --> 00:13:11,248
-You guys were together?
-No.
294
00:13:11,332 --> 00:13:13,334
-[Marita] Yes, we were.
-But she's allowed to date.
295
00:13:13,417 --> 00:13:14,376
If you aren't together…
296
00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:16,420
-Let Marita talk.
-…she'll do what she wants.
297
00:13:16,504 --> 00:13:17,630
You saying you were together?
298
00:13:17,713 --> 00:13:20,883
You know what? I'm just gonna sit here
until you let me talk.
299
00:13:20,966 --> 00:13:23,886
I don't know why
you're facilitating this conversation.
300
00:13:23,969 --> 00:13:25,346
It has nothing to do with you.
301
00:13:25,429 --> 00:13:27,598
Were you together with Ashley or no?
302
00:13:28,182 --> 00:13:29,016
Yes.
303
00:13:29,099 --> 00:13:32,269
Do you want to count the times
you cheated? I can name five right now.
304
00:13:32,353 --> 00:13:33,187
I've done nothing…
305
00:13:33,270 --> 00:13:35,022
I actually fucking hate you.
306
00:13:35,105 --> 00:13:37,024
-I hope you know that.
-[women murmuring]
307
00:13:37,107 --> 00:13:38,943
-I definitely can't.
-[woman] Time out.
308
00:13:39,026 --> 00:13:41,695
Yeah, just so you know,
my grandma is dying right now.
309
00:13:41,779 --> 00:13:44,740
Yeah, I don't care.
Guess what? You didn't care either.
310
00:13:44,824 --> 00:13:46,659
-You cheated on me.
-[woman] You don't mean that.
311
00:13:46,742 --> 00:13:48,702
All right. Let's settle down, everyone.
312
00:13:48,786 --> 00:13:50,079
-Sorry.
-I'm sorry.
313
00:13:50,162 --> 00:13:51,247
Yeah, get out.
314
00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:53,123
-[AJ] Marita.
-[Ashley] Just rude…
315
00:13:55,709 --> 00:13:58,754
[Ashley sobbing]
316
00:14:00,714 --> 00:14:01,799
[Mel] Come on, let's go.
317
00:14:02,633 --> 00:14:07,471
[Ashley crying] Like, she's literally…
I won't even get to say bye to her.
318
00:14:07,555 --> 00:14:08,681
[Britney] Check on my baby.
319
00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:12,059
-Listen, can I give you a hug, my love?
-Yes.
320
00:14:12,142 --> 00:14:14,228
-Thank you.
-I love you so much.
321
00:14:15,646 --> 00:14:16,480
I love you.
322
00:14:16,564 --> 00:14:18,858
It's a pressure cooker.
You guys are very raw.
323
00:14:18,941 --> 00:14:21,652
I know that things are heated,
and everybody has their perspectives.
324
00:14:21,735 --> 00:14:25,197
Even if you don't agree,
I really would like to give you
325
00:14:25,281 --> 00:14:27,449
an opportunity to speak your truth,
326
00:14:27,533 --> 00:14:30,369
and I would love to offer Ashley
the same thing
327
00:14:30,452 --> 00:14:32,705
when she comes back
and when she feels ready.
328
00:14:34,164 --> 00:14:35,332
[Mel whispers] You're not bad.
329
00:14:35,416 --> 00:14:36,625
[Ashley sobs]
330
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:39,295
-I loved her so much.
-I know.
331
00:14:39,378 --> 00:14:41,797
I know. You're going through
so much right now.
332
00:14:42,298 --> 00:14:43,799
You're going through so much.
333
00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:47,094
I'm very sorry about
your grandma, grandpa.
334
00:14:47,177 --> 00:14:48,012
Both.
335
00:14:48,095 --> 00:14:49,096
Thanks.
336
00:14:49,179 --> 00:14:53,183
But I'm also sorry about her parents too,
and that wasn't nice.
337
00:14:53,267 --> 00:14:54,393
[scoffs]
338
00:14:54,476 --> 00:14:57,062
Sorry I didn't cheat on someone
while her grandfather was killed.
339
00:14:57,146 --> 00:14:59,398
[Marie] I'm sorry
I didn't cheat on someone either, babe.
340
00:14:59,481 --> 00:15:01,233
I see you. I'm right here.
341
00:15:02,318 --> 00:15:03,319
Let's simmer.
342
00:15:03,986 --> 00:15:05,112
Okay.
343
00:15:11,452 --> 00:15:13,495
-[Mel] You didn't deserve it.
-Bro, like…
344
00:15:14,163 --> 00:15:16,040
She literally was so…
345
00:15:16,582 --> 00:15:17,416
[Mel] I know.
346
00:15:17,499 --> 00:15:20,294
I knew she was going to do this,
and I didn't do that.
347
00:15:21,670 --> 00:15:24,673
[JoAnna] This is a really emotional,
intense moment,
348
00:15:24,757 --> 00:15:28,594
and my only hope is that
I can just be of service to you all here,
349
00:15:28,677 --> 00:15:31,055
and I do really care about
what all of you feel and think.
350
00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:37,519
[Marita] I apologize.
351
00:15:38,729 --> 00:15:42,358
That was not how I expected everything
to go down, and I apologize.
352
00:15:44,026 --> 00:15:47,363
I'm glad you guys are back.
Ashley, how are you doing?
353
00:15:47,446 --> 00:15:48,405
Uh…
354
00:15:48,948 --> 00:15:50,950
Yeah, I mean, not good. Um…
355
00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:57,206
It hurts to hear Marita scream that
356
00:15:57,289 --> 00:16:00,167
because, like, her and I talked and, like,
357
00:16:01,460 --> 00:16:05,297
you know, I owned up
on accountability of, like,
358
00:16:05,381 --> 00:16:08,300
where I handled situations wrong
in that time,
359
00:16:08,384 --> 00:16:12,012
and it's just, like, crazy to me
because I could never, like,
360
00:16:12,096 --> 00:16:13,764
scream that I hate her.
361
00:16:16,141 --> 00:16:18,602
Um… 'Cause I don't.
362
00:16:19,853 --> 00:16:23,065
During those months of not speaking to her
and she blocked me,
363
00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:26,652
I was sitting there bawling my eyes
about her, but I got to a point
364
00:16:26,735 --> 00:16:29,488
where I started healing,
and I started realizing my worth.
365
00:16:29,571 --> 00:16:31,657
And that's why, sitting here right now,
366
00:16:31,740 --> 00:16:34,827
yeah, I was nervous
this was going to happen because, like,
367
00:16:34,910 --> 00:16:37,246
we haven't communicated
like adults about it.
368
00:16:38,789 --> 00:16:40,749
[JoAnna] I understand
there's a lot of emotions,
369
00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:44,461
but let's just take it back
to the time in Miami.
370
00:16:45,254 --> 00:16:50,217
And, Marita, I'm just interested to hear
what your thoughts were when you heard
371
00:16:50,300 --> 00:16:53,679
that Ashley was reversing
on giving the Ultimatum.
372
00:16:53,762 --> 00:16:55,806
Like, what did that make you feel?
373
00:16:56,348 --> 00:17:00,227
I didn't know that Bridget, Ashley,
and Kyle had that conversation.
374
00:17:00,310 --> 00:17:01,228
It did hurt.
375
00:17:01,311 --> 00:17:06,525
I didn't know that you were convincing
Ashley to reverse the Ultimatum on me,
376
00:17:07,568 --> 00:17:09,236
and I didn't appreciate that.
377
00:17:09,737 --> 00:17:12,573
And, yeah, I mean,
throughout the episodes,
378
00:17:12,656 --> 00:17:16,035
it just kind of seems like
you didn't really put in much effort…
379
00:17:18,537 --> 00:17:20,164
and you even said that.
380
00:17:22,207 --> 00:17:23,751
There was no lack of love.
381
00:17:23,834 --> 00:17:26,295
Like, Ashley loved you so much,
382
00:17:26,378 --> 00:17:29,214
and I'm sure she still does,
like she's saying now.
383
00:17:29,298 --> 00:17:32,760
And there was no convincing her
to reverse an ultimatum.
384
00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:35,846
That was never the case.
We talked so often about
385
00:17:35,929 --> 00:17:39,016
where Ashley needed to grow,
and where she wanted to grow,
386
00:17:39,099 --> 00:17:40,851
and, like, what she was working on.
387
00:17:40,934 --> 00:17:43,645
The way that I said
about reversing the Ultimatum
388
00:17:43,729 --> 00:17:46,023
was because we kind of
had a rough first week,
389
00:17:46,106 --> 00:17:47,566
and, like, we were arguing.
390
00:17:47,649 --> 00:17:50,778
There's so many times I cried about,
like, the thought of losing you.
391
00:17:50,861 --> 00:17:52,696
We had a great relationship.
392
00:17:53,822 --> 00:17:55,324
I still get emotional.
393
00:17:56,909 --> 00:17:58,660
Because it's tough, you know.
394
00:17:59,161 --> 00:18:01,080
It's like I lost my best friend.
395
00:18:04,666 --> 00:18:05,793
I'm sorry.
396
00:18:06,293 --> 00:18:08,087
How does it feel hearing that?
397
00:18:08,837 --> 00:18:10,714
[Marita] I mean, I agree.
398
00:18:10,798 --> 00:18:13,967
I'll never forget
the relationship that we had.
399
00:18:14,051 --> 00:18:18,347
I think that…
there are a lot of highlights,
400
00:18:18,430 --> 00:18:23,102
and I was absolutely
fully in love with you.
401
00:18:25,145 --> 00:18:25,979
[sniffles]
402
00:18:27,314 --> 00:18:31,193
Do you think there's any chance
of a reconciliation?
403
00:18:31,902 --> 00:18:36,240
I mean, I eventually, like, hope so
and, like, hope, like, we could talk.
404
00:18:38,158 --> 00:18:40,661
I'll be honest.
Like, I do think about her a lot.
405
00:18:40,744 --> 00:18:45,791
She is someone that, like, you know,
I'm always going to care for.
406
00:18:46,291 --> 00:18:50,420
I mean, I think for me,
like, it's going to take time,
407
00:18:50,504 --> 00:18:53,215
given, like, how we ended,
408
00:18:54,216 --> 00:18:56,969
'cause truly, what you did to me,
409
00:18:57,052 --> 00:18:59,513
it's heart… It's heartbreaking.
410
00:19:00,514 --> 00:19:02,558
[JoAnna] Well,
thank you so much for sharing.
411
00:19:02,641 --> 00:19:05,686
I'm glad that you at least
got to say some things today that
412
00:19:05,769 --> 00:19:08,730
hopefully led to some healing…
413
00:19:09,439 --> 00:19:11,733
-Yeah.
-…or understanding each other better.
414
00:19:13,110 --> 00:19:13,944
Okay.
415
00:19:14,945 --> 00:19:17,406
Let's move on to Mel and Marie.
416
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:20,534
I can't help but state the obvious.
417
00:19:20,617 --> 00:19:23,495
You guys are
on different sides of the room.
418
00:19:23,579 --> 00:19:24,872
You're not sitting together,
419
00:19:24,955 --> 00:19:27,457
and that's a really big shift
from where we left you.
420
00:19:27,541 --> 00:19:30,836
So, Mel, can you share the status
of your relationship with Marie?
421
00:19:31,336 --> 00:19:33,380
"With Marie" is nonexistent.
422
00:19:35,883 --> 00:19:36,717
Period.
423
00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:37,885
[JoAnna] What happened?
424
00:19:38,468 --> 00:19:40,554
Before we get into that,
I have a question.
425
00:19:41,138 --> 00:19:41,972
Dayna.
426
00:19:43,849 --> 00:19:45,934
We had very full-length conversations
427
00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:48,270
about how you thought
Mel was invaluable to you.
428
00:19:48,353 --> 00:19:51,273
-[Dayna] Yeah.
-Did you and Mel hook up
429
00:19:52,900 --> 00:19:55,360
before sitting next to me
and talking to me?
430
00:19:57,988 --> 00:20:01,033
Yeah, we had kissed by the time
that we had a cocktail party.
431
00:20:01,116 --> 00:20:02,242
And more than that?
432
00:20:02,743 --> 00:20:06,163
After the first cocktail party would've
been where something more happened.
433
00:20:06,246 --> 00:20:07,456
After the cocktail party.
434
00:20:07,539 --> 00:20:09,708
It was hard to even watch myself.
435
00:20:10,375 --> 00:20:14,755
Like, seeing your pain was really,
like, genuinely so hard to see,
436
00:20:14,838 --> 00:20:18,926
and, like, the guilt that… I feel
437
00:20:19,009 --> 00:20:22,137
just, like, not sharing that with you…
438
00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:24,973
I guess, in that moment, I justified.
439
00:20:26,016 --> 00:20:29,228
I guess I justified
that it wasn't my place,
440
00:20:29,311 --> 00:20:33,065
and I think that it was delusional
at the time to think that
441
00:20:33,148 --> 00:20:35,025
with everything that had happened,
442
00:20:35,108 --> 00:20:40,197
that there was an appropriate point
of having a friendship,
443
00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:41,823
and it wasn't fair to you.
444
00:20:41,907 --> 00:20:43,700
I'm so sorry.
445
00:20:44,284 --> 00:20:45,118
Okay.
446
00:20:46,161 --> 00:20:47,412
Please, continue.
447
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:50,082
I don't know what we were talking about.
448
00:20:50,165 --> 00:20:52,292
[Marie] The question was
what happened with us.
449
00:20:52,376 --> 00:20:54,419
-You don't want to be with me anymore.
-Mm.
450
00:20:56,171 --> 00:20:57,047
[JoAnna] Is that true?
451
00:20:58,215 --> 00:20:59,925
[Marie] I mean, I broke up with her.
452
00:21:00,008 --> 00:21:02,844
Ironically enough,
before the episodes aired.
453
00:21:04,012 --> 00:21:06,056
How embarrassing would that have been?
454
00:21:06,139 --> 00:21:07,391
[JoAnna] When did you break up?
455
00:21:07,474 --> 00:21:11,311
A couple months after… we came back home.
456
00:21:11,979 --> 00:21:15,691
I started trying to do things
a little bit more individual.
457
00:21:15,774 --> 00:21:18,402
Just, I kind of set boundaries
a little bit more.
458
00:21:18,485 --> 00:21:24,032
I didn't want to do food truck
as much as I needed to.
459
00:21:25,325 --> 00:21:28,495
I know the person who I had said yes to
460
00:21:28,578 --> 00:21:30,414
was very hesitant
on many different reasons.
461
00:21:30,497 --> 00:21:32,916
Did you really think I didn't know
that you couldn't have kids?
462
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,042
Mm-hmm.
463
00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:35,794
Like, really?
464
00:21:35,877 --> 00:21:37,087
Okay.
465
00:21:37,754 --> 00:21:40,507
[Marie] I've known you for,
like, your whole life. [laughs]
466
00:21:40,590 --> 00:21:41,425
[Mel] What else?
467
00:21:41,508 --> 00:21:45,470
When you found out that you had lupus,
you think I didn't do deep-dive research?
468
00:21:45,554 --> 00:21:47,764
-Where did all the lupus books go?
-[Mel] Give me more.
469
00:21:47,848 --> 00:21:49,474
What else did you know?
470
00:21:50,267 --> 00:21:52,311
This isn't a jab, Mel.
It's a conversation.
471
00:21:52,394 --> 00:21:53,520
[Mel] I'm speaking.
472
00:21:54,187 --> 00:21:56,231
Really? Because
it sounds like you're jabbing.
473
00:21:56,815 --> 00:21:58,233
This is how I speak. Did you forget?
474
00:21:58,317 --> 00:22:00,152
[Marie] Can't answer a question
with a question.
475
00:22:00,235 --> 00:22:01,153
[Mel] Okay.
476
00:22:01,236 --> 00:22:02,612
[Marie] Now that I'm triggered,
477
00:22:02,696 --> 00:22:06,116
what is up with those Brussels sprouts?
Why would you make those?
478
00:22:06,199 --> 00:22:08,327
Why are you so triggered about that?
479
00:22:08,410 --> 00:22:10,871
-Dayna, did you like the Brussels sprouts?
-[Mel sighs]
480
00:22:10,954 --> 00:22:13,874
[Dayna] Marie, I promise
I don't understand the relevance.
481
00:22:13,957 --> 00:22:15,834
-[Marie] Did you watch the episodes?
-Yeah, but--
482
00:22:15,917 --> 00:22:17,961
She made you Brussels sprouts.
You remember them?
483
00:22:18,045 --> 00:22:19,880
-Yeah, but I don't--
-I know you don't.
484
00:22:19,963 --> 00:22:21,965
I'm gonna explain it to you.
Did you like them?
485
00:22:22,049 --> 00:22:23,050
Yeah.
486
00:22:24,343 --> 00:22:26,219
Marie, come on. Like, stop doing this.
487
00:22:26,303 --> 00:22:29,056
[Mel] It's the most asinine things
that you're like…
488
00:22:29,139 --> 00:22:30,265
[Marie] It's not asinine.
489
00:22:30,349 --> 00:22:33,226
-It's asinine? Are you serious?
-Brussels sprouts, bro.
490
00:22:33,310 --> 00:22:35,020
Who taught you how to make those?
491
00:22:35,103 --> 00:22:37,481
-You didn't teach me anything.
-[Marie] Crazy.
492
00:22:37,564 --> 00:22:39,483
-[Mel] So that's funny.
-That's cute.
493
00:22:41,735 --> 00:22:43,779
Who's running the food truck business now?
494
00:22:45,364 --> 00:22:46,281
This guy.
495
00:22:47,657 --> 00:22:49,534
Which will do well.
496
00:22:50,869 --> 00:22:52,371
-Thanks.
-[Marie] You don't need me.
497
00:22:52,454 --> 00:22:54,664
But I do want to touch
a little bit on Haley.
498
00:22:54,748 --> 00:22:58,710
At one of the cocktail parties,
you had a conversation with Marie,
499
00:22:58,794 --> 00:23:02,089
um, sharing with her that Dayna and Mel
500
00:23:02,172 --> 00:23:04,466
were a little bit more
romantically inclined,
501
00:23:04,549 --> 00:23:06,259
and that you had some receipts.
502
00:23:06,343 --> 00:23:10,555
So I'm wondering,
is the Spotify playlist the receipt?
503
00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:11,681
[Haley] Yes. Yeah.
504
00:23:11,765 --> 00:23:12,599
[JoAnna] Okay.
505
00:23:12,682 --> 00:23:16,645
Let's take a look at the investigation
behind the alleged proof.
506
00:23:18,897 --> 00:23:23,026
Both of your accounts opened up,
and all there's been was sex playlists.
507
00:23:23,819 --> 00:23:25,404
[Bridget] Like a sex playlist?
508
00:23:25,487 --> 00:23:30,158
-I don't know what kind of proof that is.
-How did their Spotify end up on their TV?
509
00:23:30,826 --> 00:23:35,580
It's a shared private playlist
only shared between Mel and Dayna
510
00:23:35,664 --> 00:23:41,336
called "Three Weeks"
with a rainbow emoji and a ring emoji.
511
00:23:41,420 --> 00:23:44,714
I don't think that's proof. Like,
there's probably good songs on there.
512
00:23:44,798 --> 00:23:46,800
Maybe they just wanted to listen to them.
513
00:23:46,883 --> 00:23:51,388
The playlist does have some horny songs,
and they are being played
514
00:23:51,471 --> 00:23:54,182
at suspicious times of the night.
515
00:23:54,266 --> 00:23:57,894
There's no way you're cleaning your house
listening to some boom-boom music.
516
00:23:57,978 --> 00:24:00,480
[Dayna] Why is this relevant?
It's a playlist. Be for real.
517
00:24:00,564 --> 00:24:05,277
You're talking about a goddamn playlist.
Please just simmer down. Honestly.
518
00:24:05,360 --> 00:24:06,820
Do you have a sex playlist?
519
00:24:08,488 --> 00:24:11,241
-So you have one?
-Absolutely. You need a sex playlist.
520
00:24:11,825 --> 00:24:14,661
Dayna was like, "Magan's wanted me
to get Spotify for so long
521
00:24:14,744 --> 00:24:17,080
and I'm not gonna,"
but then she got it for me.
522
00:24:17,164 --> 00:24:19,082
-So I was kind of like, sorry.
-Damn.
523
00:24:19,624 --> 00:24:20,459
[laughs]
524
00:24:21,418 --> 00:24:23,086
-It's all good.
-Jesus Christ.
525
00:24:23,628 --> 00:24:27,424
-[woman] I wanna know about this playlist.
-I'm glad I'm single. I'm gonna say that.
526
00:24:27,507 --> 00:24:30,552
-[woman] I want to hear it.
-There was not one sex song.
527
00:24:30,635 --> 00:24:33,221
Yeah, that would be
a very sad sex playlist.
528
00:24:33,305 --> 00:24:34,473
[Dayna] It was the saddest…
529
00:24:34,556 --> 00:24:36,516
If that's a sex playlist,
it was the saddest ever,
530
00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:38,977
because they were all
heartbreak songs, love songs.
531
00:24:39,060 --> 00:24:40,520
Like, it was not…
532
00:24:40,604 --> 00:24:43,523
There was not one song
of that nature on there.
533
00:24:43,607 --> 00:24:46,151
[Dayna] I think to go to the extent
to say a playlist is proof
534
00:24:46,234 --> 00:24:48,320
that people are doing things…
535
00:24:48,403 --> 00:24:50,989
One, wasn't your place. Two, is insane.
536
00:24:51,072 --> 00:24:54,117
Like, you should have just minded
your business that pays you.
537
00:24:54,201 --> 00:24:57,037
Were you or were you not
doing things though?
538
00:24:57,120 --> 00:24:59,623
Magan was the one
that called it proof initially.
539
00:24:59,706 --> 00:25:01,374
It was probably the wrong word for it.
540
00:25:01,458 --> 00:25:05,837
And I should not have reiterated
the words "proof," "receipts," whatever.
541
00:25:05,921 --> 00:25:07,964
Doesn't… it… That's not what it was.
542
00:25:08,048 --> 00:25:11,218
You didn't say a word at the party
about what was going on between you.
543
00:25:11,301 --> 00:25:13,678
Even though everyone knew,
you didn't say anything.
544
00:25:13,762 --> 00:25:15,805
-I know you didn't either.
-I did tell Pilar.
545
00:25:15,889 --> 00:25:18,975
Well, good for you, but that wouldn't
have been anyone else's place.
546
00:25:19,059 --> 00:25:21,811
-So--
-But I think if I have suspicions of it,
547
00:25:21,895 --> 00:25:24,564
I think that it is my place
to tell my friend…
548
00:25:24,648 --> 00:25:26,274
-Agree.
-…my suspicions.
549
00:25:26,983 --> 00:25:29,110
[Marie] I don't think it's fair for Haley.
550
00:25:29,194 --> 00:25:31,154
Because whatever the case may be,
551
00:25:32,322 --> 00:25:33,573
something did happen.
552
00:25:33,657 --> 00:25:34,658
-Fair.
-[Marie] Period.
553
00:25:36,326 --> 00:25:38,703
Okay, seeing that cocktail party back,
554
00:25:38,787 --> 00:25:42,332
Haley didn't blankly say
that Mel and Dayna had sex.
555
00:25:44,125 --> 00:25:46,753
I know that
we can all define sex differently.
556
00:25:46,836 --> 00:25:51,424
So, let's take a look at what
some of you consider sex to be.
557
00:25:51,508 --> 00:25:52,717
-Oh, God.
-Oh, Jesus.
558
00:25:53,802 --> 00:25:57,013
People define sex
between couples differently.
559
00:25:57,097 --> 00:25:59,349
Sexual cuddling.
560
00:25:59,432 --> 00:26:00,600
That might be sex.
561
00:26:00,684 --> 00:26:04,688
If you ask like a hetero couple,
it's like, well, you know, like, you know?
562
00:26:04,771 --> 00:26:05,897
That's it.
563
00:26:07,607 --> 00:26:12,362
But with lesbians and queer people,
there's just such a broad way to say sex.
564
00:26:12,445 --> 00:26:14,322
-Let me tell you.
-[laughing]
565
00:26:14,406 --> 00:26:17,701
If you twiddle her pussy, guess what,
that might be sex to one group, right?
566
00:26:18,493 --> 00:26:20,161
You eat me, I eat you.
567
00:26:20,704 --> 00:26:21,955
Done. Good night.
568
00:26:22,455 --> 00:26:24,249
Penetration of any sorts.
569
00:26:24,749 --> 00:26:28,086
If you shove, like, any object in her,
that might be sex.
570
00:26:28,169 --> 00:26:30,547
You like a five-dollar Footlong
or a ten-inch dick?
571
00:26:30,630 --> 00:26:31,840
-I don't know.
-[Marie] Stop it.
572
00:26:32,465 --> 00:26:34,593
You have to use your mouth, your fingers.
573
00:26:34,676 --> 00:26:38,138
It has to be every part that you can use.
574
00:26:38,221 --> 00:26:40,557
I'm trying not to be too, like, graphic.
575
00:26:40,640 --> 00:26:45,020
I define sex as, like, oral pleasure.
576
00:26:45,937 --> 00:26:46,980
[laughing]
577
00:26:48,064 --> 00:26:50,817
Me and Mel,
we did not have sex in that way.
578
00:26:50,900 --> 00:26:53,069
We didn't finger each other.
Anything like that.
579
00:26:53,153 --> 00:26:55,780
[both laughing]
580
00:26:55,864 --> 00:26:58,283
Sex looks different for everybody. So…
581
00:26:58,825 --> 00:27:01,494
What you deem as sex,
I might not deem as sex.
582
00:27:02,245 --> 00:27:03,788
Oh, God, don't say that.
583
00:27:04,497 --> 00:27:05,332
Touching.
584
00:27:05,415 --> 00:27:06,541
That's intimacy.
585
00:27:06,625 --> 00:27:07,626
Period.
586
00:27:07,709 --> 00:27:12,005
Next thing you know, she lied
off of a technicality on what sex means.
587
00:27:15,050 --> 00:27:16,593
[laughing]
588
00:27:17,135 --> 00:27:20,555
So, Mel, by definition,
did you have sex with Dayna?
589
00:27:23,683 --> 00:27:25,143
By whose definition?
590
00:27:25,226 --> 00:27:26,519
Your definition.
591
00:27:26,603 --> 00:27:27,520
[Mel laughs]
592
00:27:30,690 --> 00:27:32,525
It's honestly no one's business.
593
00:27:32,609 --> 00:27:36,738
And I'm tired of, like,
people thinking it's their business.
594
00:27:36,821 --> 00:27:38,114
This is between me and Mel
595
00:27:38,198 --> 00:27:41,409
and whoever we share
our personal lives with.
596
00:27:41,493 --> 00:27:43,286
We did not have sex.
I will leave it at that.
597
00:27:43,370 --> 00:27:44,663
Things happened between us.
598
00:27:44,746 --> 00:27:47,040
If they would like to get into it,
they're welcome.
599
00:27:47,123 --> 00:27:49,167
Me and Magan have had
our own conversations.
600
00:27:49,250 --> 00:27:51,044
Everyone else, mind your fucking business.
601
00:27:52,629 --> 00:27:53,463
[JoAnna] Okay.
602
00:27:53,963 --> 00:27:56,216
Mel, during your trial marriage
with Dayna,
603
00:27:56,299 --> 00:28:00,595
Marie did confront you in the car
asking you if you had sex with Dayna.
604
00:28:00,679 --> 00:28:02,389
So let's clear the air here.
605
00:28:02,472 --> 00:28:05,642
Do you feel like you lied to her
in that moment?
606
00:28:06,643 --> 00:28:10,939
Um, I felt like by not telling her
anything intimate at all happened,
607
00:28:11,022 --> 00:28:12,023
yes, I lied.
608
00:28:12,607 --> 00:28:16,152
But I think that if we're going off of,
you know,
609
00:28:16,236 --> 00:28:20,198
exactly what we just spoke about
and technicality of all this and all that,
610
00:28:20,281 --> 00:28:21,157
then no.
611
00:28:21,241 --> 00:28:25,036
So I was using, like,
I'm not going to say a loophole,
612
00:28:25,120 --> 00:28:29,374
but, like, no, we didn't have sex
because we hadn't gone to that extent.
613
00:28:29,958 --> 00:28:34,713
But to not say that anything other than,
like, you know, whatever happened,
614
00:28:34,796 --> 00:28:35,714
then yes.
615
00:28:38,299 --> 00:28:40,510
Magan, we saw that you had
a hard time processing
616
00:28:40,593 --> 00:28:43,722
what was going on
during Dayna and Mel's trial marriage.
617
00:28:43,805 --> 00:28:45,598
-[Magan] Yeah.
-Watching everything back now,
618
00:28:45,682 --> 00:28:46,766
how are you feeling?
619
00:28:47,767 --> 00:28:50,228
I mean, if I'm being completely honest,
620
00:28:50,729 --> 00:28:52,439
like, when Dayna and I come together,
621
00:28:52,522 --> 00:28:55,483
we have, like,
a certain type of energy together.
622
00:28:55,567 --> 00:28:58,778
And when her and Mel came together,
623
00:28:58,862 --> 00:29:00,697
they had their own type of energy.
624
00:29:01,573 --> 00:29:03,742
I also exhibited a different energy
625
00:29:03,825 --> 00:29:05,994
than what Dayna and I have with Haley.
626
00:29:06,745 --> 00:29:08,621
And we both leaned into it.
627
00:29:09,122 --> 00:29:11,416
Now we're just understanding
how to be better partners
628
00:29:11,499 --> 00:29:14,586
and really just understand
what we need individually.
629
00:29:14,669 --> 00:29:15,920
Yeah, I love that.
630
00:29:17,756 --> 00:29:21,634
Okay, Mel, have you reached out
to Dayna since Ultimatum Day?
631
00:29:22,761 --> 00:29:24,763
I have not.
632
00:29:25,680 --> 00:29:27,682
She had reached out to me.
633
00:29:28,600 --> 00:29:30,518
Dayna, what did you reach out
to Mel about?
634
00:29:30,602 --> 00:29:33,229
I actually tried to FaceTime her
because I'm a FaceTimer.
635
00:29:33,313 --> 00:29:35,482
So I tried to FaceTime her,
she didn't answer.
636
00:29:35,565 --> 00:29:37,734
So I just sent her a message instead.
637
00:29:37,817 --> 00:29:39,861
She ghosted me for, like, two months.
[laughs]
638
00:29:40,987 --> 00:29:43,281
I think about two months later,
she reached out like,
639
00:29:43,364 --> 00:29:45,909
"Hey, got your message, appreciate it."
640
00:29:45,992 --> 00:29:46,868
"We're cool."
641
00:29:46,951 --> 00:29:50,288
And that was that, really. Yeah.
642
00:29:50,371 --> 00:29:52,791
You guys got matching tattoos
during the process.
643
00:29:52,874 --> 00:29:53,708
Yeah.
644
00:29:53,792 --> 00:29:56,419
What do those mean to you now?
645
00:29:56,503 --> 00:29:58,963
[Dayna] The thought behind it
when we got the tattoos
646
00:29:59,047 --> 00:30:02,592
was, like, there's potentially
going to be a big chance
647
00:30:02,675 --> 00:30:04,928
we aren't going to be
in each other's lives after this.
648
00:30:05,011 --> 00:30:08,556
So I think when it came to the tattoo,
it was like,
649
00:30:08,640 --> 00:30:10,809
well, at least we'll have this thing.
650
00:30:10,892 --> 00:30:12,852
Anyone who was in here
and had a connection
651
00:30:12,936 --> 00:30:16,523
with their trial partner can understand.
It is a very deep connection.
652
00:30:17,357 --> 00:30:20,151
So for me, that's where, like,
the value stood in the tattoo.
653
00:30:20,735 --> 00:30:23,363
I didn't need to get a tattoo.
We could have got a henna.
654
00:30:23,446 --> 00:30:24,531
[woman] Yeah. [laughing]
655
00:30:24,614 --> 00:30:27,116
But I think the intention behind it,
I don't regret.
656
00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:30,870
And I don't, like, take back the idea
657
00:30:30,954 --> 00:30:35,959
of having, like, a meaningful,
symbolic representation.
658
00:30:36,042 --> 00:30:38,795
I felt like at points, like,
with Dayna, it would be like,
659
00:30:38,878 --> 00:30:40,255
well, who can be stupider?
660
00:30:40,338 --> 00:30:42,090
Like, who can make the worst decision?
661
00:30:42,173 --> 00:30:44,968
Then we're both just kind of like,
"Okay, let's go with it."
662
00:30:45,051 --> 00:30:48,972
There was a point where we were like,
we'll make dumb decisions and regret it.
663
00:30:49,055 --> 00:30:52,350
And it was just like, why would we think
that's, like, a good idea?
664
00:30:52,433 --> 00:30:53,810
So, I don't know.
665
00:30:53,893 --> 00:30:55,770
We constantly said we were very similar.
666
00:30:55,854 --> 00:30:59,148
And I think that that was, like,
the epitome of, like,
667
00:30:59,232 --> 00:31:01,901
not the bad sides of us,
but just the irresponsible sides of us
668
00:31:01,985 --> 00:31:04,612
that were just, like,
hyping each other up all the time.
669
00:31:06,114 --> 00:31:08,700
[JoAnna] Marie, is there anything left
that you want to say to Mel?
670
00:31:08,783 --> 00:31:09,659
No.
671
00:31:11,995 --> 00:31:14,080
Mel, anything to Marie?
672
00:31:16,291 --> 00:31:17,333
No.
673
00:31:17,417 --> 00:31:18,376
[JoAnna] Okay.
674
00:31:18,459 --> 00:31:21,546
Thank you both for sharing with us today.
675
00:31:22,630 --> 00:31:25,383
The Ultimatum is no doubt a real test.
676
00:31:25,466 --> 00:31:28,303
And this season,
as each of you faced its challenges,
677
00:31:28,386 --> 00:31:33,016
there seemed to be one common place
for comfort that you all had. [giggles]
678
00:31:33,099 --> 00:31:36,769
And that was the love that you had
for your fur babies.
679
00:31:37,353 --> 00:31:38,771
Let's take a look.
680
00:31:38,855 --> 00:31:40,732
-[Bridget] Is Bentley gay?
-I think he is.
681
00:31:41,900 --> 00:31:43,902
-[Bridget] Like mother, like son.
-[both laughing]
682
00:31:43,985 --> 00:31:48,990
Whoever I end up with is going to
have to accept him basically as my child.
683
00:31:49,073 --> 00:31:51,576
[Marita] She just, like,
gives him more attention.
684
00:31:51,659 --> 00:31:53,494
I'm like, "I'm here too."
685
00:31:53,578 --> 00:31:57,123
If she's taking away,
like, my blanket and giving it to him,
686
00:31:57,707 --> 00:31:59,125
that means I'm cold.
687
00:32:00,585 --> 00:32:02,962
My son, Bello, my bunny.
688
00:32:03,046 --> 00:32:04,422
Bello!
689
00:32:04,505 --> 00:32:05,715
We are a package deal.
690
00:32:05,798 --> 00:32:08,092
You're getting a little manicure.
691
00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:10,720
He's definitely a certified lover bunny.
692
00:32:11,846 --> 00:32:13,681
My cats are very important to me.
693
00:32:13,765 --> 00:32:14,807
Beth!
694
00:32:15,808 --> 00:32:17,769
[Dayna] I hate when you say it like that.
695
00:32:17,852 --> 00:32:19,771
She's very obsessed with her cats.
696
00:32:19,854 --> 00:32:21,981
But, like, honestly, it's very cute.
697
00:32:22,065 --> 00:32:23,900
Don't get jealous of our love.
698
00:32:24,776 --> 00:32:25,860
Duke, give me a pound.
699
00:32:25,944 --> 00:32:27,612
Besides my dad and my brother,
700
00:32:27,695 --> 00:32:30,490
like, he's like the third man
I've ever loved in my life.
701
00:32:31,282 --> 00:32:32,742
Doesn't he look handsome?
702
00:32:32,825 --> 00:32:33,952
Hello.
703
00:32:34,035 --> 00:32:37,664
I have cats, which I know maybe
doesn't mean anything to many people,
704
00:32:37,747 --> 00:32:39,123
but I have a family.
705
00:32:39,207 --> 00:32:42,585
Maybe it's not the same thing,
but family really is what you make of it.
706
00:32:42,669 --> 00:32:45,129
[AJ] Having Duke here,
it'll be an interesting dynamic
707
00:32:45,213 --> 00:32:46,923
to see him live with cats.
708
00:32:47,006 --> 00:32:48,216
[Marie] Hi!
709
00:32:48,758 --> 00:32:50,176
-[cat yowls]
-Whoa, whoa, whoa!
710
00:32:50,259 --> 00:32:51,844
-[dog whimpers]
-Okay, stop.
711
00:32:51,928 --> 00:32:53,388
[AJ] What was you thinking?
712
00:32:53,471 --> 00:32:57,558
The number one gay rule in life
is pussy always wins.
713
00:32:57,642 --> 00:32:59,268
[all laughing]
714
00:32:59,894 --> 00:33:03,022
[JoAnna] Okay, let's move on to a couple
that brings their own distinct flavor
715
00:33:03,106 --> 00:33:06,025
to everything they do,
and their love story is no exception.
716
00:33:06,109 --> 00:33:08,444
Kyle and Bridget. Give us an update.
717
00:33:08,528 --> 00:33:09,654
How are you guys doing?
718
00:33:09,737 --> 00:33:10,655
I'm pregnant.
719
00:33:10,738 --> 00:33:11,906
[all laughing]
720
00:33:11,990 --> 00:33:13,992
Just kidding. We can't afford that.
721
00:33:14,075 --> 00:33:15,827
-We're good.
-We're engaged.
722
00:33:15,910 --> 00:33:17,286
We're living together.
723
00:33:17,370 --> 00:33:18,663
How has that been?
724
00:33:18,746 --> 00:33:19,664
[Bridget] It's great.
725
00:33:19,747 --> 00:33:24,460
I mean, I think I was hesitant
just because, like, things were so good,
726
00:33:24,544 --> 00:33:26,504
and I didn't want to mess up a good thing.
727
00:33:26,587 --> 00:33:32,468
And I think I've moved fast in the past,
and so with our relationship, I mean…
728
00:33:32,552 --> 00:33:34,595
We got together quickly, but, like,
729
00:33:34,679 --> 00:33:38,016
I felt like we waited
until we were desperate to live together.
730
00:33:38,099 --> 00:33:39,976
-I think that's how it should be.
-Yeah.
731
00:33:40,059 --> 00:33:42,311
What are some things
you learned about each other
732
00:33:42,395 --> 00:33:45,523
now that you're living together
that you love, maybe don't love?
733
00:33:45,606 --> 00:33:46,899
Like, what is it?
734
00:33:46,983 --> 00:33:49,652
I think we're both pretty type B.
735
00:33:49,736 --> 00:33:51,195
Yeah, we're very similar.
736
00:33:51,279 --> 00:33:52,864
Yeah, and, like…
737
00:33:52,947 --> 00:33:54,741
-Kind of a mess.
-It could be a mess.
738
00:33:54,824 --> 00:33:56,451
Bridget's, like, really not…
739
00:33:56,534 --> 00:33:58,453
She leaves things out a lot, so it's just…
740
00:33:58,536 --> 00:34:01,539
It's hard when, like, no one is,
like, the one that's like,
741
00:34:01,622 --> 00:34:02,498
"We need to clean."
742
00:34:02,582 --> 00:34:04,876
We, like, plan cleaning,
and then we, like, don't,
743
00:34:04,959 --> 00:34:07,837
and it's just, like, I'll find Bridget,
like, laying on the bed.
744
00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:09,922
"You're supposed to be
putting clothes away."
745
00:34:10,006 --> 00:34:11,299
I'm supposed to be cleaning.
746
00:34:11,382 --> 00:34:12,925
-Yeah.
-Um…
747
00:34:13,009 --> 00:34:16,012
-[Kyle] I'm cooking for her.
-There you go. We talked about that.
748
00:34:16,095 --> 00:34:18,431
-Pilar talked about that.
-[Bridget] Sharing a life together.
749
00:34:18,514 --> 00:34:20,475
-Yeah.
-Like, every Sunday, we switch off.
750
00:34:20,558 --> 00:34:23,603
Like, one of us cooks,
reconnect, talk about the week.
751
00:34:23,686 --> 00:34:26,856
But it's just made me love
and appreciate Bridget more.
752
00:34:26,939 --> 00:34:29,233
She's just, like, such a bizarre person.
753
00:34:29,317 --> 00:34:30,943
-She's, like…
-[all laughing]
754
00:34:31,027 --> 00:34:32,320
We have crows that come,
755
00:34:32,403 --> 00:34:35,198
so she's trying to entice them
onto our patio.
756
00:34:35,281 --> 00:34:36,783
They like cashews better than peanuts.
757
00:34:36,866 --> 00:34:39,994
And I'll just watch her outside,
just, like, looking for the birds.
758
00:34:40,078 --> 00:34:41,204
The crow lady.
759
00:34:41,287 --> 00:34:43,748
This might be one of
my favorite things about you.
760
00:34:43,831 --> 00:34:45,958
Yeah, I had the best time
living with Bridget.
761
00:34:46,042 --> 00:34:47,376
Like, Bridget's hilarious.
762
00:34:47,460 --> 00:34:48,628
She's so funny.
763
00:34:48,711 --> 00:34:51,422
-There's no boredom, so that's good.
-[JoAnna] That's huge.
764
00:34:51,506 --> 00:34:55,134
So you mentioned that you didn't think
that it was going to feel any different.
765
00:34:55,218 --> 00:34:57,720
Does it feel different being engaged?
766
00:34:57,804 --> 00:35:01,140
Our relationship is different,
just after going through the show.
767
00:35:01,224 --> 00:35:04,310
-Yeah.
-I think our love is deeper in a way
768
00:35:04,393 --> 00:35:07,730
because we've had to, like,
navigate new challenges.
769
00:35:07,814 --> 00:35:08,815
Yeah.
770
00:35:08,898 --> 00:35:13,820
What was the turning point for you
to make you want to take the next step?
771
00:35:13,903 --> 00:35:16,280
My whole thing is that marriage, to me,
772
00:35:16,364 --> 00:35:18,783
I didn't really understand
what the big deal was
773
00:35:18,866 --> 00:35:21,160
or, like, why anybody needs to do it.
774
00:35:21,244 --> 00:35:22,745
That's why I wanted my trial marriage
775
00:35:22,829 --> 00:35:25,331
to be about learning
how people feel about marriage.
776
00:35:25,414 --> 00:35:27,083
And maybe then I can understand it.
777
00:35:27,166 --> 00:35:29,585
And it did help, but I think, ultimately,
778
00:35:30,169 --> 00:35:33,297
this is a thing that matters a lot
to the person that I love
779
00:35:33,381 --> 00:35:35,758
that I want to spend my life with.
780
00:35:35,842 --> 00:35:40,096
So, like, why am I… not embracing that?
781
00:35:40,179 --> 00:35:43,432
Do you have any regrets
about pushing Pilar towards Kyle?
782
00:35:45,601 --> 00:35:49,981
I don't. I think Kyle
is such a special person,
783
00:35:50,064 --> 00:35:53,734
and I really wanted her to have
a trial marriage with somebody
784
00:35:54,610 --> 00:35:58,322
that I thought understood who she was
and valued who she was.
785
00:35:58,406 --> 00:36:02,326
And this being
our first secure relationship,
786
00:36:02,410 --> 00:36:05,371
I wanted Kyle to experience that
with somebody else
787
00:36:05,454 --> 00:36:07,957
so that I could have the confidence
that it was me.
788
00:36:08,040 --> 00:36:10,710
I wasn't setting anything up.
They were going to choose each other.
789
00:36:10,793 --> 00:36:12,587
We were just talking about it.
790
00:36:12,670 --> 00:36:16,257
-You didn't have to choose someone for me.
-Yeah, that's not what was happening.
791
00:36:16,340 --> 00:36:19,594
Kyle, your parents, especially your mom,
they were such a joy to watch,
792
00:36:19,677 --> 00:36:22,263
and, um, they radiated
so much warmth and love.
793
00:36:22,346 --> 00:36:26,517
And in what ways has your mom
shaped your view of love and marriage?
794
00:36:26,601 --> 00:36:29,979
My parents, they, like,
respect each other so much.
795
00:36:30,062 --> 00:36:32,648
My mom is obviously, like,
the one that shines,
796
00:36:32,732 --> 00:36:34,901
but my dad… is, like…
797
00:36:34,984 --> 00:36:36,777
I can tell he's so proud of her,
798
00:36:36,861 --> 00:36:39,238
and just, like, so happy to be with her.
799
00:36:39,322 --> 00:36:40,615
And they're both funny.
800
00:36:40,698 --> 00:36:43,492
Yeah, they're both funny,
and they have fun together
801
00:36:43,576 --> 00:36:47,121
and just, like,
don't take things too seriously.
802
00:36:47,747 --> 00:36:50,791
Well, let's actually take a look
at some additional words of wisdom
803
00:36:50,875 --> 00:36:52,668
from Kyle's mom.
804
00:36:52,752 --> 00:36:56,505
I have constantly
been thankful for Bridget
805
00:36:56,589 --> 00:36:59,133
to be in Kyle's life.
806
00:36:59,759 --> 00:37:05,348
We know that they are better
than if they were apart.
807
00:37:11,687 --> 00:37:14,273
Just like the Wicked song,
808
00:37:15,024 --> 00:37:20,071
"Because I knew you,
I have been changed for good."
809
00:37:21,864 --> 00:37:23,407
Love each other.
810
00:37:23,491 --> 00:37:28,454
Notice the fantastic things
about each other.
811
00:37:28,537 --> 00:37:29,997
Have grace for each other.
812
00:37:30,081 --> 00:37:34,335
And make this world a better place.
813
00:37:34,418 --> 00:37:36,045
[laughs]
814
00:37:36,128 --> 00:37:38,005
That was cliché.
815
00:37:38,089 --> 00:37:41,509
And that is my major advice.
816
00:37:41,592 --> 00:37:43,844
-[woman] She's so cute.
-Go, Mom.
817
00:37:43,928 --> 00:37:45,596
What a sweetheart. So sweet.
818
00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:46,847
Stealing our hearts.
819
00:37:46,931 --> 00:37:50,184
[Pilar] The conversation that we had,
I'll always hold that in my heart.
820
00:37:50,268 --> 00:37:53,437
With my parents, I feel like
I was always picturing a certain, like,
821
00:37:53,521 --> 00:37:57,775
a conversation, a realization,
like a big, like, apology, like a cry.
822
00:37:57,858 --> 00:38:01,195
And I realized I can only control me.
823
00:38:01,279 --> 00:38:03,572
Maybe that'll never come,
or maybe it will come,
824
00:38:03,656 --> 00:38:05,616
but, like, I can also forgive and move on.
825
00:38:05,700 --> 00:38:08,703
I was like, "Damn, that's so simple
when you say it like that."
826
00:38:08,786 --> 00:38:11,622
That was a really, like,
turning and pivotal point for me.
827
00:38:11,706 --> 00:38:15,376
Just watching what you went through,
it's really an inspiration.
828
00:38:15,459 --> 00:38:16,752
I know it wasn't easy,
829
00:38:16,836 --> 00:38:18,754
but it's incredible
to see where you are now.
830
00:38:18,838 --> 00:38:20,214
And I see that ring.
831
00:38:20,298 --> 00:38:21,841
[laughs] Yes, it's so beautiful.
832
00:38:21,924 --> 00:38:23,134
But give us an update.
833
00:38:23,217 --> 00:38:26,595
-Where do things stand between you two?
-It's been really good.
834
00:38:26,679 --> 00:38:31,058
I told Pilar once we left… She was dying
to get a ring on her finger also.
835
00:38:31,142 --> 00:38:33,561
And so I told her within the next year,
836
00:38:33,644 --> 00:38:36,981
I would make sure that I made it
a priority to get down on one knee.
837
00:38:37,064 --> 00:38:38,774
And I did it less than a month later.
838
00:38:38,858 --> 00:38:40,067
[women] Aw.
839
00:38:40,151 --> 00:38:41,777
Do we have a wedding date?
840
00:38:41,861 --> 00:38:43,904
So we don't have a wedding date.
841
00:38:43,988 --> 00:38:47,408
But one thing that we have started
is planning for an elopement.
842
00:38:47,491 --> 00:38:51,120
And that just kind of comes down to,
like, the place and the world
843
00:38:51,203 --> 00:38:53,664
that we're living in right now. Um…
844
00:38:53,748 --> 00:38:57,084
I just kind of can't wait
to have that kind of security.
845
00:38:57,168 --> 00:39:00,004
Wherever we go, hopefully,
I guess not everywhere,
846
00:39:00,087 --> 00:39:03,007
-but you and your partner are safe.
-[JoAnna] Yeah.
847
00:39:03,090 --> 00:39:06,427
We started our guest wedding list.
We got stressed out. We're like,
848
00:39:06,510 --> 00:39:09,180
"We're gonna put a pause on this."
But yeah, we're really excited.
849
00:39:09,263 --> 00:39:10,723
I better be on it.
850
00:39:10,806 --> 00:39:12,224
-Of course.
-Of course.
851
00:39:12,308 --> 00:39:15,061
So I know family
is a big thing for you, Pilar.
852
00:39:15,603 --> 00:39:18,105
Have you been able to share
your engagement with them?
853
00:39:18,189 --> 00:39:19,148
Yeah.
854
00:39:19,231 --> 00:39:20,358
It was definitely hard,
855
00:39:20,441 --> 00:39:23,611
but I think the biggest thing
through this experience
856
00:39:23,694 --> 00:39:26,655
was really me letting go
of, like, my attachment
857
00:39:26,739 --> 00:39:29,200
of my self-worth to their acceptance.
858
00:39:29,283 --> 00:39:32,161
Although it's not exactly the happy ending
859
00:39:32,244 --> 00:39:34,830
or full-circle moment
that I was hoping to give,
860
00:39:34,914 --> 00:39:40,086
I feel like, in standing up for myself and
having hard conversations with my parents,
861
00:39:40,169 --> 00:39:44,131
it's led to doors being opened
that I never thought would be opened.
862
00:39:44,215 --> 00:39:46,634
I don't know what the wedding
is going to look like exactly,
863
00:39:46,717 --> 00:39:49,845
but for the first time,
I feel so free and happy and just, like,
864
00:39:49,929 --> 00:39:54,058
us and our love is, like, enough,
and I don't need anything more than that.
865
00:39:54,141 --> 00:39:57,186
I totally understand
where you're coming from with your family.
866
00:39:57,269 --> 00:39:59,980
Like, even though my family
is coming around now,
867
00:40:00,064 --> 00:40:03,401
it took so many years
for them to even, like…
868
00:40:05,027 --> 00:40:08,364
like, keep in their brain
that, like, I was gay
869
00:40:08,447 --> 00:40:10,032
and I wanted to be with a woman.
870
00:40:10,116 --> 00:40:13,244
And, like, it was so push-and-pull
for years,
871
00:40:13,327 --> 00:40:15,121
and I felt rejected for years.
872
00:40:15,204 --> 00:40:18,916
But I kept choosing myself,
and I kept, like, living authentically.
873
00:40:19,500 --> 00:40:21,335
Keep having faith, keep being yourself,
874
00:40:21,419 --> 00:40:24,839
and anybody would be, like,
blessed to be around you.
875
00:40:24,922 --> 00:40:26,590
Thank you, I appreciate you saying that.
876
00:40:26,674 --> 00:40:28,050
I feel like there is a big element
877
00:40:28,134 --> 00:40:30,511
of applying what we learned
through this experience.
878
00:40:30,594 --> 00:40:32,304
Like you said, living authentically…
879
00:40:32,388 --> 00:40:35,516
How can other people respect you
if we don't respect ourselves?
880
00:40:35,599 --> 00:40:37,518
We went to my cousin's wedding,
881
00:40:37,601 --> 00:40:40,938
and that was the first time I've brought
Haley around my extended family.
882
00:40:41,021 --> 00:40:43,774
And I remember being like,
"This is Haley."
883
00:40:43,858 --> 00:40:46,819
And I did that,
and I did that two more times,
884
00:40:46,902 --> 00:40:49,113
and I was like, no, like, it feels wrong.
885
00:40:49,196 --> 00:40:52,324
This is going against everything
that I thought I was growing.
886
00:40:52,408 --> 00:40:53,742
I don't want to go backwards.
887
00:40:53,826 --> 00:40:56,203
And I started, like, no,
"This is my fiancée, Haley."
888
00:40:56,287 --> 00:40:59,748
The more I said that and looked people
in their eyes, they were like…
889
00:41:00,332 --> 00:41:01,834
If I said, "This is Haley,"
890
00:41:01,917 --> 00:41:04,420
they'd be sheepish,
then just kind of walk away.
891
00:41:04,503 --> 00:41:06,672
Then I was like,
"This is my fiancée, Haley."
892
00:41:06,755 --> 00:41:10,509
They had to look me in the eye, like,
"Nice to meet you. You look so beautiful."
893
00:41:10,593 --> 00:41:14,346
And when I demanded that space…
people can't back down.
894
00:41:14,430 --> 00:41:17,516
That was a big turning point in me.
This is all that it's about.
895
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:20,769
If you have something to say
or don't respect me, fine. Like…
896
00:41:20,853 --> 00:41:22,480
That's your problem, not mine.
897
00:41:22,563 --> 00:41:24,273
-That's growth.
-That's exactly what it is.
898
00:41:24,356 --> 00:41:26,025
It's their problem and not yours.
899
00:41:26,108 --> 00:41:26,942
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
900
00:41:27,026 --> 00:41:27,860
[JoAnna] I love it.
901
00:41:28,402 --> 00:41:30,529
So, Pilar, from your point of view,
902
00:41:30,613 --> 00:41:33,616
what exactly did happen
between you and Kyle
903
00:41:33,699 --> 00:41:35,159
that night at the club?
904
00:41:35,659 --> 00:41:36,660
[sighs]
905
00:41:36,744 --> 00:41:38,287
[all laughing]
906
00:41:38,370 --> 00:41:40,581
[Pilar] I feel like we kissed at the club,
907
00:41:41,081 --> 00:41:44,001
and what I felt in that time was so real.
908
00:41:44,084 --> 00:41:47,588
And I still feel that. How we saw
each other, how you made me feel,
909
00:41:47,671 --> 00:41:49,632
and the growth we had, I feel like…
910
00:41:49,715 --> 00:41:53,677
This one incident that we had clouded
that entire experience and it took away.
911
00:41:53,761 --> 00:41:55,804
I feel like we would've been
really good friends.
912
00:41:55,888 --> 00:41:59,266
I wish that I had just been better
913
00:41:59,350 --> 00:42:01,852
at communicating with you
how I was feeling,
914
00:42:01,936 --> 00:42:04,355
because I did feel so close to you, like…
915
00:42:04,438 --> 00:42:08,442
And I'm so glad we got over that
and did have great moments, but…
916
00:42:08,526 --> 00:42:12,196
I think I was just so confused
with the connection that we had,
917
00:42:12,780 --> 00:42:16,742
and I was selfish, and I don't know
what I was thinking, honestly,
918
00:42:16,825 --> 00:42:19,036
and I lost sight
of the reason I was there.
919
00:42:19,119 --> 00:42:21,539
Like, I really wish
we could have just been, like,
920
00:42:21,622 --> 00:42:23,123
there's clearly chemistry here,
921
00:42:23,207 --> 00:42:26,252
but we want to be here
to better ourselves for our partner.
922
00:42:26,335 --> 00:42:29,880
If you'd just exactly said what you said,
I would have been like, "Girl, yeah!"
923
00:42:29,964 --> 00:42:31,090
That's what I wanted,
924
00:42:31,173 --> 00:42:33,926
and I feel like that's what
I was trying to get out of you.
925
00:42:34,009 --> 00:42:36,929
And when we had that…
that was a deep conversation with us.
926
00:42:37,012 --> 00:42:39,515
I was like, yes,
this is exactly why we're here also,
927
00:42:39,598 --> 00:42:42,393
is we have so much to grow from this.
928
00:42:43,143 --> 00:42:45,646
I just feel like I'm sad
that this one thing took away.
929
00:42:45,729 --> 00:42:47,481
[Bridget] When you first
start dating somebody,
930
00:42:47,565 --> 00:42:50,276
it would make a lot of sense
for what happened to happen,
931
00:42:50,359 --> 00:42:54,446
but there's this added layer of,
"But I came here to leave with somebody
932
00:42:54,530 --> 00:42:56,407
that I love and care about."
933
00:42:56,490 --> 00:42:59,451
That aspect of, "There's a little bit
of, like, chemistry here,"
934
00:42:59,535 --> 00:43:03,747
and, like, interest and, like,
"I've never been with anyone like you,"
935
00:43:03,831 --> 00:43:08,335
it challenged us to show up…
"How do we deal with this,
936
00:43:08,419 --> 00:43:11,964
what does it mean for us, our partners,
and how can we learn?"
937
00:43:12,047 --> 00:43:15,301
-And I feel like that's why we came here.
-Yeah, absolutely.
938
00:43:15,384 --> 00:43:17,928
I was honestly taken aback when we…
939
00:43:18,012 --> 00:43:20,806
After we took some time,
and after pickleball…
940
00:43:20,889 --> 00:43:24,143
And just how you were still, like, there.
941
00:43:24,226 --> 00:43:26,979
Like, I know I was, like,
crying in the episode,
942
00:43:27,062 --> 00:43:29,648
but, like, I just wasn't used to that,
943
00:43:29,732 --> 00:43:32,860
and, like, having that blow up
and then having you be like,
944
00:43:32,943 --> 00:43:35,321
"No, we're going to work through this."
It really did… Sorry.
945
00:43:35,404 --> 00:43:36,405
[women] Aw.
946
00:43:36,488 --> 00:43:38,073
-[woman] Kyle.
-[Pilar] Can I hug you?
947
00:43:39,658 --> 00:43:40,618
[Kyle] Yeah, me too.
948
00:43:44,496 --> 00:43:45,456
Me too.
949
00:43:45,539 --> 00:43:48,584
And I'm… sorry that, like, things…
950
00:43:48,667 --> 00:43:51,337
I feel like everyone, like,
we ended our trial marriages
951
00:43:51,420 --> 00:43:53,922
on such a good note,
and by the end of the experience,
952
00:43:54,006 --> 00:43:56,800
like, no one was talking, um,
953
00:43:57,384 --> 00:43:58,636
which is too bad, but…
954
00:43:58,719 --> 00:44:01,430
[JoAnna] Pilar, you expressed
coming into this that your worst fear
955
00:44:01,513 --> 00:44:03,682
was that Haley would fall in love
with someone else.
956
00:44:03,766 --> 00:44:07,603
What was the hardest part
of watching everything unfold
957
00:44:07,686 --> 00:44:09,021
with Haley and Magan?
958
00:44:09,104 --> 00:44:12,524
It was just confusing,
everything that was happening.
959
00:44:12,608 --> 00:44:14,777
It's not exactly that they fell in love,
960
00:44:14,860 --> 00:44:16,862
because that's always a possibility.
961
00:44:16,945 --> 00:44:20,157
But I was like,
if you're going to pursue Magan
962
00:44:20,240 --> 00:44:22,201
or if things that you guys have developed
963
00:44:22,284 --> 00:44:24,912
were stronger than our relationship,
I want you to do that.
964
00:44:24,995 --> 00:44:27,539
Please do that.
Just don't make me look stupid.
965
00:44:27,623 --> 00:44:30,084
But she was always avid
that it was always us,
966
00:44:30,167 --> 00:44:32,795
and I was like, okay,
so I just took it as an opportunity
967
00:44:32,878 --> 00:44:37,132
that there was something I wasn't doing
or a void that I clearly created.
968
00:44:37,216 --> 00:44:39,843
I just didn't prioritize Haley,
and I realized how much
969
00:44:39,927 --> 00:44:42,721
I had pushed her to the side
in, like, our relationship.
970
00:44:42,805 --> 00:44:45,224
And I just wanted to take that
to be better for her
971
00:44:45,307 --> 00:44:46,934
and understand where she was coming from,
972
00:44:47,017 --> 00:44:49,603
and what Magan was providing
that I clearly wasn't.
973
00:44:49,687 --> 00:44:52,690
Like, the work-life balance
and, like, prioritizing us,
974
00:44:52,773 --> 00:44:55,317
yeah, that's a big learning point for us
975
00:44:55,401 --> 00:44:57,194
in our relationship and our growth.
976
00:44:57,277 --> 00:44:59,405
Okay. Well, I have to ask.
977
00:44:59,988 --> 00:45:02,658
Haley, what was it like to be in love
with two people at one time?
978
00:45:02,741 --> 00:45:04,702
I know you described your love
in a different way,
979
00:45:04,785 --> 00:45:07,037
but you were at a crossroads.
980
00:45:07,705 --> 00:45:11,041
[Haley] I mean,
you kind of feel bad on both sides,
981
00:45:11,125 --> 00:45:13,252
because on the one hand, like,
982
00:45:13,335 --> 00:45:16,171
I'm having to tell
my partner of ten years,
983
00:45:16,255 --> 00:45:19,550
like, "Yes, I could have feelings
for this other person."
984
00:45:19,633 --> 00:45:21,677
But how do you fully articulate
985
00:45:22,261 --> 00:45:24,555
how different those feelings are?
986
00:45:24,638 --> 00:45:28,267
I think that the physical component is,
like, what makes it a lot harder.
987
00:45:28,350 --> 00:45:29,226
Mm-hmm.
988
00:45:29,309 --> 00:45:32,980
The combination of the two,
that, like, it was unnecessary,
989
00:45:33,063 --> 00:45:36,525
and… you know, you can't take it back.
990
00:45:36,608 --> 00:45:39,778
So I'm not even gonna go into,
like, regret versus not regret.
991
00:45:39,862 --> 00:45:41,572
That part doesn't matter.
992
00:45:41,655 --> 00:45:43,782
But what mattered more to me
was just, like,
993
00:45:43,866 --> 00:45:48,036
making Pilar feel really secure
after that moment, because…
994
00:45:49,246 --> 00:45:53,625
really the future that I really wanted,
as long as she would have it,
995
00:45:53,709 --> 00:45:54,668
was with Pilar.
996
00:45:54,752 --> 00:45:55,753
[JoAnna] Yeah.
997
00:45:55,836 --> 00:45:59,423
It's sad, because there was just
a profound effect on a lot of people.
998
00:45:59,506 --> 00:46:00,799
I'm not a bridge burner,
999
00:46:00,883 --> 00:46:03,469
but it's kind of hard
to, like, leave things, like…
1000
00:46:03,552 --> 00:46:04,470
It's just like, "Damn,
1001
00:46:04,553 --> 00:46:06,805
-this was so important at one point."
-What was it all for?
1002
00:46:06,889 --> 00:46:08,223
Yeah, now it's, like, gone.
1003
00:46:08,307 --> 00:46:09,641
Now we're back a year later.
1004
00:46:10,684 --> 00:46:13,228
All right. Dayna and Magan.
1005
00:46:13,312 --> 00:46:16,648
Last we saw you, Magan,
you got on one knee,
1006
00:46:16,732 --> 00:46:19,943
and Dayna surprised us all
with a double proposal.
1007
00:46:20,027 --> 00:46:21,612
Girl, that dress would have busted.
1008
00:46:21,695 --> 00:46:24,490
-I would've got down on that knee.
-She didn't have to.
1009
00:46:24,573 --> 00:46:27,034
They had to sew that shit up
right before I got there.
1010
00:46:27,117 --> 00:46:28,577
All right, let's have some fun.
1011
00:46:28,660 --> 00:46:30,496
Why don't we take a look
at how Dayna and Magan
1012
00:46:30,579 --> 00:46:32,873
have been building their life
over the past year
1013
00:46:32,956 --> 00:46:34,458
as a newly engaged couple.
1014
00:46:34,541 --> 00:46:35,375
I'm scared.
1015
00:46:35,459 --> 00:46:36,794
-Let's see.
-This is a good one.
1016
00:46:36,877 --> 00:46:38,378
-It's a good one?
-Yes.
1017
00:46:38,462 --> 00:46:42,841
♪ I wanna fly with youEvery day and every night ♪
1018
00:46:42,925 --> 00:46:47,596
♪ I wanna hold youEvery day and all my life ♪
1019
00:46:47,679 --> 00:46:49,848
Pressing against my face.
1020
00:46:51,558 --> 00:46:55,979
-Shake it. Shake it. Shake it. Shake it.
-Hey! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
1021
00:46:56,063 --> 00:46:59,107
Happy birthday! Happy birthday! [laughs]
1022
00:46:59,191 --> 00:47:03,320
♪ Fell so hardI fell so deep ♪
1023
00:47:03,403 --> 00:47:05,280
♪ I wanna love you ♪
1024
00:47:05,364 --> 00:47:08,158
-[Dayna chuckling]
-♪ Every day and every night ♪
1025
00:47:08,242 --> 00:47:09,159
[Magan groans]
1026
00:47:10,410 --> 00:47:12,246
[laughs] Damn.
1027
00:47:12,329 --> 00:47:14,790
[JoAnna] Well, are you still on track
to getting married?
1028
00:47:14,873 --> 00:47:17,167
Yeah, we just don't really know when yet.
1029
00:47:17,251 --> 00:47:19,962
Yeah, I think we still also just,
like, wanna make sure
1030
00:47:20,045 --> 00:47:22,005
everyone in our lives are comfortable.
1031
00:47:22,089 --> 00:47:23,048
So how's that going?
1032
00:47:23,131 --> 00:47:25,384
Because I know that
that was a big thing for you.
1033
00:47:25,467 --> 00:47:29,596
Yeah, so, um,
when I was in Miami, it was a lot.
1034
00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:31,890
I was on the phone with my mom and dad
1035
00:47:31,974 --> 00:47:33,809
like… majority of the week
1036
00:47:33,892 --> 00:47:36,520
just kind of like telling them,
"I need you."
1037
00:47:36,603 --> 00:47:37,980
And they were both there for me.
1038
00:47:38,063 --> 00:47:41,149
And when we came back,
we knew things had to change.
1039
00:47:41,233 --> 00:47:42,776
We knew things were gonna change.
1040
00:47:42,860 --> 00:47:45,779
My mom… like, it kind of took a few tries
1041
00:47:45,863 --> 00:47:49,199
for Dayna and my mom
to really, like, understand each other.
1042
00:47:49,283 --> 00:47:50,200
But it happened.
1043
00:47:50,784 --> 00:47:53,287
We're actually planning for
both of our parents to meet soon.
1044
00:47:53,370 --> 00:47:54,663
Aw.
1045
00:47:54,746 --> 00:47:58,250
You realize when you're not serious,
people aren't gonna take you serious.
1046
00:47:58,333 --> 00:47:59,710
Or if you're not certain,
1047
00:47:59,793 --> 00:48:02,212
people aren't gonna think
you're certain about certain things.
1048
00:48:02,296 --> 00:48:05,340
And considering, like, what
Dayna and I went through on the show,
1049
00:48:06,258 --> 00:48:08,468
I just presented it to them
in a serious way.
1050
00:48:08,552 --> 00:48:11,179
Like, "Hey, like,
you know, I really love this person."
1051
00:48:11,263 --> 00:48:15,183
And like, "There's no reason
why you shouldn't give them a chance."
1052
00:48:15,267 --> 00:48:18,437
She actually came around for, uh…
for Thanksgiving last year,
1053
00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:20,105
which was really nice, yeah.
1054
00:48:20,188 --> 00:48:23,317
I never, uh… I never brought anybody
for Thanksgiving before.
1055
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:24,318
So it was nice.
1056
00:48:24,401 --> 00:48:26,069
It was really cool. [laughs]
1057
00:48:26,153 --> 00:48:27,070
Are you okay?
1058
00:48:27,154 --> 00:48:29,072
-Yeah, I'm good. Yeah.
-Um…
1059
00:48:30,157 --> 00:48:32,993
It's like… Now I'm gonna cry.
1060
00:48:33,076 --> 00:48:34,369
No, you're good, you're good.
1061
00:48:35,454 --> 00:48:36,872
Um, it's just…
1062
00:48:37,623 --> 00:48:42,628
It's like seeing her, like…
believe in herself is, like,
1063
00:48:43,545 --> 00:48:47,049
really all I've ever wanted for her. Um…
1064
00:48:47,591 --> 00:48:51,053
And, like, she found that times ten.
1065
00:48:51,970 --> 00:48:56,850
And then I realized… on top of that,
you know, suddenly she was so…
1066
00:48:56,934 --> 00:48:58,310
She's so gung-ho, like,
1067
00:48:58,393 --> 00:49:00,687
"Come to my mom's house."
I'm like, "Shit."
1068
00:49:00,771 --> 00:49:04,191
Now I have to, like…
I have to… I have to be the brave one.
1069
00:49:04,274 --> 00:49:07,194
Like, oh my gosh, like, I'm scared now.
1070
00:49:07,277 --> 00:49:10,364
Like, you know, this is hard, to go
somewhere where you're not wanted
1071
00:49:10,447 --> 00:49:11,949
or maybe you're gonna be rejected.
1072
00:49:12,032 --> 00:49:14,159
-[JoAnna] Or misunderstood.
-I mean, all of it.
1073
00:49:14,242 --> 00:49:17,579
Now I know what it's like to experience
what it must be like to her.
1074
00:49:17,663 --> 00:49:19,331
And that was hard, you know.
1075
00:49:19,414 --> 00:49:22,501
That was something
I also didn't comprehend, was like…
1076
00:49:22,584 --> 00:49:25,003
They had to be brave.
That was bravery for them.
1077
00:49:25,087 --> 00:49:28,215
They were uncomfortable.
They were scared. They were nervous.
1078
00:49:28,298 --> 00:49:29,758
They didn't know what to do.
1079
00:49:29,841 --> 00:49:32,678
It's uncomfortable for everyone,
but everyone was being brave.
1080
00:49:32,761 --> 00:49:34,262
Them really trying.
1081
00:49:34,346 --> 00:49:37,140
I know how hard it must be for them
to shake those beliefs
1082
00:49:37,224 --> 00:49:39,851
and just try to even
just have an open mind.
1083
00:49:39,935 --> 00:49:42,270
And, like, now we're in a great place.
1084
00:49:42,771 --> 00:49:45,774
I think watching the show back
was a little bit, like, daunting
1085
00:49:45,857 --> 00:49:48,819
because it was like, wow, this was
kind of supposed to be for us
1086
00:49:48,902 --> 00:49:52,572
to, like, have something to show,
like, "Be proud of us."
1087
00:49:52,656 --> 00:49:54,241
Like, "See, we're normal."
1088
00:49:54,783 --> 00:49:58,328
And to not have that to show for now,
I think, made me sad for her,
1089
00:49:58,412 --> 00:50:01,790
because it was to show them,
"See, you can be gay and be normal,
1090
00:50:01,873 --> 00:50:05,043
or you can have a good relationship,
but we do love each other."
1091
00:50:05,127 --> 00:50:08,797
We didn't expect our situations
to be as dramatic as they were.
1092
00:50:08,880 --> 00:50:13,885
We just kind of wanted to also show,
like, give them a little platform
1093
00:50:13,969 --> 00:50:17,431
to see us in a different light
that they don't get to see us.
1094
00:50:17,514 --> 00:50:21,476
So it's sad that now they're gonna
have to deal with the opposite of that,
1095
00:50:21,560 --> 00:50:24,229
which is, like,
repercussions of my behavior.
1096
00:50:24,312 --> 00:50:25,230
[Magan] It'll be okay.
1097
00:50:25,313 --> 00:50:29,317
I get it wasn't the "fairy tale"
that you wanted them to see,
1098
00:50:29,401 --> 00:50:33,321
but it actually shows that
you guys have what it takes to make it.
1099
00:50:33,405 --> 00:50:34,990
-Yeah.
-[JoAnna] Magan.
1100
00:50:35,073 --> 00:50:40,954
What role did Haley play
in you finding this sort of confidence
1101
00:50:41,038 --> 00:50:43,540
-and drawing those boundaries?
-[Magan] Yeah.
1102
00:50:43,623 --> 00:50:48,587
I never created the space
for myself to, like, initiate things.
1103
00:50:48,670 --> 00:50:53,133
And I think, like… being with Haley,
like, she was a really good listener,
1104
00:50:53,216 --> 00:50:55,677
and she gave me the space,
and she heard me out,
1105
00:50:55,761 --> 00:50:57,804
and, like, she helped me process things
1106
00:50:57,888 --> 00:51:00,766
because, like, her and I
operated the same way.
1107
00:51:01,349 --> 00:51:03,769
I found a lot of clarity talking to her.
1108
00:51:03,852 --> 00:51:06,104
I think like where things got misconstrued
1109
00:51:06,188 --> 00:51:09,316
is like, I would tell Haley
all the time that I loved her,
1110
00:51:09,900 --> 00:51:14,279
and I wanted Haley to be in my life
at some sort of capacity.
1111
00:51:14,362 --> 00:51:17,616
And honestly, like, I really wish
that we didn't take things so far
1112
00:51:17,699 --> 00:51:22,370
because Haley would have been
an amazing friend to me, you know?
1113
00:51:22,454 --> 00:51:25,624
And I think, like, it's unfortunate,
you know, but it is what it is.
1114
00:51:25,707 --> 00:51:27,125
And you can't change the past.
1115
00:51:27,209 --> 00:51:29,711
Just because I said
I wasn't in love with you,
1116
00:51:29,795 --> 00:51:34,174
I didn't want to take away
all of the, like, love that was there.
1117
00:51:34,966 --> 00:51:37,302
And I'm sorry. I'm sorry for that.
1118
00:51:38,386 --> 00:51:41,598
The feelings were very confused,
but looking back, it's like…
1119
00:51:41,681 --> 00:51:42,891
You seemed really hurt.
1120
00:51:42,974 --> 00:51:44,518
[Haley] And of course I was hurt,
1121
00:51:44,601 --> 00:51:47,979
because we thought we were gonna
be able to be friends after this.
1122
00:51:48,063 --> 00:51:50,565
-Yeah.
-And that's not how it was.
1123
00:51:50,649 --> 00:51:53,944
The whole thing just got
twisted around into something ugly
1124
00:51:54,027 --> 00:51:56,321
that I don't think
either of us recognized.
1125
00:51:56,822 --> 00:51:59,157
What happened, happened.
And it's unfortunate.
1126
00:51:59,241 --> 00:52:00,951
I was really anxious coming into this
1127
00:52:01,034 --> 00:52:04,579
because I feel like there could have been
so much animosity and mud.
1128
00:52:04,663 --> 00:52:07,999
I was like, I'm not proud of everything,
but I'm proud of how we came back together
1129
00:52:08,083 --> 00:52:11,586
and how we showed up for each other,
and what we are and the work we've done.
1130
00:52:11,670 --> 00:52:14,714
And not to say that year,
and this past year, was easy…
1131
00:52:14,798 --> 00:52:17,008
because it had trials and tribulations.
1132
00:52:17,092 --> 00:52:21,847
But now I can confidently say how strong
Haley and I, and happy we are, and like…
1133
00:52:23,014 --> 00:52:25,559
Yeah, I'm just really happy
with the result.
1134
00:52:25,642 --> 00:52:27,310
It was so hard to watch that back.
1135
00:52:27,394 --> 00:52:32,732
And anyone here has every right
to be furious for at least one reason.
1136
00:52:32,816 --> 00:52:36,027
Every person that's in this room
has at least one reason to be furious.
1137
00:52:36,111 --> 00:52:39,656
And like, I'm grateful that,
like, we can speak in this way,
1138
00:52:39,739 --> 00:52:42,492
and, like, be able
to openly talk about these things
1139
00:52:42,576 --> 00:52:44,828
-without it being, like, animosity.
-I agree.
1140
00:52:44,911 --> 00:52:47,706
For me and Britney, it was hard
because we love both of you.
1141
00:52:47,789 --> 00:52:49,875
We love the shit out of you guys.
1142
00:52:49,958 --> 00:52:52,627
And we both want you guys
to come to our wedding.
1143
00:52:52,711 --> 00:52:55,005
And we were like,
well, where would they sit?
1144
00:52:55,088 --> 00:52:57,674
Yeah, that was so hard.
Honestly, it's so hard for you guys.
1145
00:52:57,757 --> 00:53:00,844
-I hate that we had to put you…
-You didn't put us in any position.
1146
00:53:00,927 --> 00:53:02,971
[Dayna] But you guys handled it amazingly.
1147
00:53:03,054 --> 00:53:05,432
You guys have been such great friends.
1148
00:53:05,515 --> 00:53:07,517
We never felt like you guys took sides.
1149
00:53:07,601 --> 00:53:09,686
We never felt like
you took our side either.
1150
00:53:09,769 --> 00:53:12,397
Like, we felt like
we were just friends with you.
1151
00:53:12,480 --> 00:53:15,525
And like you had your own relationship
with other people.
1152
00:53:15,609 --> 00:53:17,944
I almost, like, was like getting giddy.
1153
00:53:18,028 --> 00:53:20,280
Like, "Oh my God, can we all be cool?"
1154
00:53:20,947 --> 00:53:22,657
Like, are we going out later?
1155
00:53:23,700 --> 00:53:25,076
Are we all going out after this?
1156
00:53:25,160 --> 00:53:27,954
Like, you guys texted me,
I think a couple days ago.
1157
00:53:28,038 --> 00:53:29,456
"What are you doing after?"
1158
00:53:29,539 --> 00:53:33,960
And I was like, "I hope we can
all just hold hands together."
1159
00:53:34,044 --> 00:53:36,838
The way this is going,
it's sounding more and more like that.
1160
00:53:36,922 --> 00:53:37,964
I'm with you, Marita.
1161
00:53:38,048 --> 00:53:39,090
JoAnna, are you coming?
1162
00:53:39,174 --> 00:53:40,884
-Yeah, JoAnna.
-[Magan] You coming too?
1163
00:53:40,967 --> 00:53:41,801
Hold my hand.
1164
00:53:42,677 --> 00:53:43,678
Shots on me.
1165
00:53:43,762 --> 00:53:45,639
[all laughing]
1166
00:53:45,722 --> 00:53:46,640
[JoAnna] All right.
1167
00:53:46,723 --> 00:53:50,018
So it seems like
you are all in a really great place.
1168
00:53:50,101 --> 00:53:53,104
Who do you think grew most
in this experience?
1169
00:53:53,188 --> 00:53:56,191
And who do you think has more work to do?
1170
00:53:56,775 --> 00:54:00,612
I'll nominate myself for,
like, has a lot of work to do.
1171
00:54:00,695 --> 00:54:03,323
I think, like, watching myself back
was painful.
1172
00:54:04,157 --> 00:54:07,077
And I thought
I was a very self-aware person,
1173
00:54:07,160 --> 00:54:09,287
and realized how un-self-aware I was.
1174
00:54:09,371 --> 00:54:11,248
Actually, I'm thankful
for the point of reference
1175
00:54:11,331 --> 00:54:13,083
to like, okay, here's what I see.
1176
00:54:13,166 --> 00:54:14,542
And here's what I can now do.
1177
00:54:14,626 --> 00:54:17,837
You don't ever get to experience
looking at yourself like that.
1178
00:54:17,921 --> 00:54:19,965
I would say that you improved the most.
1179
00:54:20,048 --> 00:54:24,261
I mean, like, you know, looking
at the video, like, you are so different.
1180
00:54:24,344 --> 00:54:25,845
You're kind of overlooking that.
1181
00:54:25,929 --> 00:54:27,806
-I think that's so important.
-I appreciate you.
1182
00:54:27,889 --> 00:54:29,891
I think you should be
so proud of yourself.
1183
00:54:29,975 --> 00:54:31,268
-I love you.
-I'm proud of you.
1184
00:54:31,351 --> 00:54:34,271
I think everybody can
keep growing and keep evolving.
1185
00:54:34,354 --> 00:54:39,317
You know, I don't think it's necessarily
like who did and who didn't.
1186
00:54:39,401 --> 00:54:42,737
For the part that matters the most,
like, who can?
1187
00:54:42,821 --> 00:54:43,655
Everybody.
1188
00:54:44,447 --> 00:54:47,701
Well, a huge thank you to all of you
for being here today.
1189
00:54:47,784 --> 00:54:49,995
It's been so great to hear from everyone
1190
00:54:50,078 --> 00:54:52,789
and see how far you all have come
since we first met.
1191
00:54:52,872 --> 00:54:54,541
-Whoo!
-[Pilar] Let's go.
1192
00:54:54,624 --> 00:54:58,211
I have to say, JoAnna, before we go,
I don't think you get enough credit.
1193
00:54:58,295 --> 00:55:01,047
And I think everybody here
can either speak to this.
1194
00:55:01,131 --> 00:55:04,426
Like, I don't think you get enough credit
of how an amazing host you are,
1195
00:55:04,509 --> 00:55:05,927
how you show up for us.
1196
00:55:06,011 --> 00:55:09,597
And even though you are
a straight-presenting woman,
1197
00:55:09,681 --> 00:55:13,518
it's bridging the gap
between what we experience
1198
00:55:13,601 --> 00:55:16,688
from other people
that may not see us how you see us.
1199
00:55:17,272 --> 00:55:21,151
Your love and your compassion towards us
makes us feel so seen.
1200
00:55:21,234 --> 00:55:24,195
I will never forget what you said
to Pilar that first night
1201
00:55:24,279 --> 00:55:25,488
-about family.
-It meant a lot.
1202
00:55:25,572 --> 00:55:27,240
It meant so much to her, so much to me.
1203
00:55:27,324 --> 00:55:32,162
It brought a lot of light to my parents
where they were like, "She's straight."
1204
00:55:32,245 --> 00:55:33,580
And I was like, yeah.
1205
00:55:33,663 --> 00:55:36,791
And if she can stand up here
and accept all of us,
1206
00:55:36,875 --> 00:55:39,210
and we don't need
the acceptance or understanding,
1207
00:55:39,294 --> 00:55:42,339
but if you can stand here
and be that person,
1208
00:55:42,422 --> 00:55:47,218
like, I truly believe that it is the gap
that needs that bridge.
1209
00:55:47,302 --> 00:55:49,679
And you are that bridge for us,
so thank you.
1210
00:55:50,930 --> 00:55:52,515
Well, that means a lot to me.
1211
00:55:53,433 --> 00:55:57,354
I really feel like such an ally,
and I believe so much in love.
1212
00:55:57,437 --> 00:56:01,566
And I believe that it's so important
to celebrate love in all forms.
1213
00:56:01,649 --> 00:56:02,484
So thank you so much.
1214
00:56:02,567 --> 00:56:05,737
I don't think you understand
how much that means to me.
1215
00:56:05,820 --> 00:56:07,489
-[women] Aw!
-We love you, Jo.
1216
00:56:07,572 --> 00:56:10,742
At the end of the day,
what matters is your experience.
1217
00:56:10,825 --> 00:56:14,162
I know it hasn't been a perfect one,
and I know there's a lot of feelings.
1218
00:56:14,245 --> 00:56:18,458
But just surround yourself
with the people that are celebrating you,
1219
00:56:18,541 --> 00:56:20,752
because I will be celebrating all of you.
1220
00:56:21,544 --> 00:56:24,714
-And officiating our wedding.
-[JoAnna] I will officiate your wedding!
1221
00:56:25,298 --> 00:56:28,385
And we've also got something
super exciting to share with you
1222
00:56:28,468 --> 00:56:29,761
and everyone else at home.
1223
00:56:29,844 --> 00:56:31,805
♪ Can't stop the heat right now ♪
1224
00:56:31,888 --> 00:56:35,266
You can now experience
the same high-stake decisions and drama
1225
00:56:35,350 --> 00:56:37,185
that will put your love to the test.
1226
00:56:37,268 --> 00:56:43,400
Now only on Netflix Games for iOS
and Android, play The Ultimatum: Choices.
1227
00:56:45,443 --> 00:56:49,489
For now, thank you for your trust
in The Ultimatum, and here's to love.
1228
00:56:49,572 --> 00:56:50,740
[cheers and applause]
1229
00:56:50,824 --> 00:56:52,158
[JoAnna] Who wants to hug me?
1230
00:56:52,242 --> 00:56:53,743
Yeah!
1231
00:56:53,827 --> 00:56:56,830
[indistinct chatter and laughter]
1232
00:56:56,913 --> 00:56:59,207
-Oh, we're hugging everybody.
-I'm hugging you.
1233
00:56:59,290 --> 00:57:00,667
I am, like, not a toucher.
1234
00:57:00,750 --> 00:57:01,876
[Magan] Kyle, give me a hug.
1235
00:57:02,710 --> 00:57:04,421
You guys are so incredible.
1236
00:57:04,504 --> 00:57:06,506
♪ Can't stop the beat right now ♪
1237
00:57:06,589 --> 00:57:08,800
♪ Can't stop the heat right now ♪
1238
00:57:08,883 --> 00:57:11,010
♪ Feel it all over me right now ♪
1239
00:57:11,094 --> 00:57:13,304
♪ Yeah, I'm feeling so hot, hot, hot ♪
1240
00:57:23,815 --> 00:57:24,691
♪ Uh-huh ♪
1241
00:57:26,359 --> 00:57:27,193
♪ Yeah ♪
1242
00:57:27,277 --> 00:57:29,195
♪ I've been working all week for this ♪
1243
00:57:30,655 --> 00:57:31,489
♪ Uh-huh ♪
1244
00:57:31,573 --> 00:57:33,908
♪ Yeah, I'm feeling so hot, hot, hot ♪
1245
00:57:33,992 --> 00:57:35,785
[song ends]
104317
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