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I left China in 2011.
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00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:25,540
I left to find something I'd
been searching for all my life.
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00:02:28,500 --> 00:02:31,630
Along the way, I've learned
I'm not the only one looking.
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00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:48,560
Traveling was one of the few
freedoms I knew in China.
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00:02:51,730 --> 00:02:54,150
Every year since I
was 20 years old,
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00:02:54,440 --> 00:02:59,910
I would celebrate my birthday
by traveling to a new place.
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00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:02,490
I started this
tradition in China.
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00:03:02,780 --> 00:03:04,910
On my first birthday
living in New York,
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00:03:05,200 --> 00:03:08,080
I bought a one-way ticket
and went to Florida.
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00:03:12,670 --> 00:03:15,630
I was excited to document
every conversation I had.
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00:03:15,920 --> 00:03:17,050
Welcome to America.
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00:03:17,340 --> 00:03:19,550
Like this is-- this is
what America is like.
13
00:03:19,840 --> 00:03:22,640
Since I was a teen, I just
wanted to grab a backpack
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00:03:22,930 --> 00:03:24,470
and go travel, you
know, not knowing
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00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:26,770
where I'm going to sleep or
who I'm going to be with.
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00:03:27,060 --> 00:03:28,270
That excited me.
17
00:03:28,560 --> 00:03:30,690
Tell me what's
your next plan-- travel?
18
00:03:30,980 --> 00:03:33,560
I'm going to South
America for six months.
19
00:03:36,900 --> 00:03:40,360
A few days into
the trip, I stayed at a hostel
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00:03:40,650 --> 00:03:42,570
where I met someone
whose mode of travel
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00:03:42,860 --> 00:03:44,240
was different from
anyone I knew.
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00:04:10,230 --> 00:04:11,230
How do you spell your name?
23
00:04:18,980 --> 00:04:19,860
Dylan.
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00:04:20,150 --> 00:04:20,900
Dylan.
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00:04:21,190 --> 00:04:21,990
And your last name?
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00:04:22,280 --> 00:04:23,910
Olsen.
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00:04:26,660 --> 00:04:28,240
The first
night I met Dylan,
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00:04:28,540 --> 00:04:32,460
we talked for hours about
our lives and travels.
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00:04:32,750 --> 00:04:35,290
What did you have when
you first got on the road?
30
00:04:35,580 --> 00:04:38,420
An empty backpack
and no money.
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00:04:38,710 --> 00:04:41,590
I just began to travel
across the country.
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00:04:41,880 --> 00:04:45,680
How can you pay the
hostel if you don't have money?
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00:04:45,970 --> 00:04:48,390
I-- I worked for them.
34
00:04:48,680 --> 00:04:54,270
I-- I came here offering
my work for a place
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00:04:54,560 --> 00:05:00,030
to close my eyes at night that
was safe and a place to just
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00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:02,490
to be at peace.
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00:05:22,630 --> 00:05:23,800
So many
people come and go,
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00:05:24,090 --> 00:05:25,090
it's hard to remember.
39
00:05:25,380 --> 00:05:26,890
I do know that when
I first met Dylan,
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00:05:27,180 --> 00:05:29,510
I immediately identified
he was a street kid.
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00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:31,310
How?
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00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:34,520
Just because
he's a street kid.
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00:05:34,810 --> 00:05:37,600
You meet so many people,
you can see certain things.
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00:05:37,900 --> 00:05:39,270
It's evident.
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00:05:39,560 --> 00:05:42,650
And so we had a conversation
and made the agreement
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00:05:42,940 --> 00:05:48,320
that he would leave all those
survival skills of the street
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00:05:48,620 --> 00:05:49,780
behind.
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00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:52,740
They have no place here.
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00:05:53,040 --> 00:05:55,540
We identified that immediately.
50
00:05:55,830 --> 00:05:58,000
And it's very rare
that we'll allow that.
51
00:05:58,290 --> 00:06:02,550
But he's unique-- very
smart, very creative.
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00:06:02,840 --> 00:06:06,300
He's got one of the best
skills that you can have--
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00:06:06,590 --> 00:06:09,760
fearless in working--
fearless in doing.
54
00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:21,620
- I
- wanted to experience the life
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00:07:21,920 --> 00:07:24,210
that Dylan described to me.
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00:07:24,500 --> 00:07:25,960
When he went back
to the streets,
57
00:07:26,250 --> 00:07:29,800
I decided to follow him with
my camera despite the fact
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00:07:30,090 --> 00:07:32,010
that I hardly knew him.
59
00:07:52,530 --> 00:07:54,280
Oh, we need a better map.
60
00:08:02,460 --> 00:08:03,960
Being
lost is where I'm found.
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00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:11,510
Upon arriving the path
that I am happy to tread,
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00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:15,550
my shoes come off, and I
experience that full connection
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00:08:15,850 --> 00:08:16,680
with the floor.
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00:08:16,970 --> 00:08:19,810
It's as if I can breathe better.
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00:08:20,100 --> 00:08:23,440
Observing everybody else
around in their entirety,
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00:08:23,730 --> 00:08:27,610
their passions, their
bizarre behaviors,
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00:08:27,900 --> 00:08:31,320
as well as their observing
me and my bizarre behaviors.
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00:08:48,460 --> 00:08:51,710
There's no time
living in this sense.
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00:08:52,010 --> 00:08:54,220
I don't know what day it is.
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00:08:54,510 --> 00:08:56,720
Every day is now, right now.
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00:08:57,010 --> 00:08:57,890
Every time is right now.
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00:09:04,230 --> 00:09:05,350
I taught Dylan
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00:09:05,650 --> 00:09:07,860
how to use my camera
so he could document
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00:09:08,150 --> 00:09:09,110
my experiences a while.
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00:09:16,700 --> 00:09:21,910
This was the first time I ate
food from our garbage can.
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00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:24,500
It was the beginning of
my short street life.
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00:09:40,640 --> 00:09:42,390
"Wherever
he goes, he leaves an echo
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00:09:42,680 --> 00:09:45,770
to show from the pitter
patter of his feet
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00:09:46,060 --> 00:09:49,150
to the magic incantation
he speaks, a man
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00:09:49,440 --> 00:09:52,400
from the past living
in the present.
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00:09:52,690 --> 00:09:55,700
So his presence is
living in the future.
82
00:09:55,990 --> 00:09:59,530
Yesterday and tomorrow-- last
week was seven years long."
83
00:11:18,610 --> 00:11:20,110
Why you choose
to be on the street?
84
00:11:20,410 --> 00:11:21,610
Hmm.
85
00:11:21,910 --> 00:11:23,410
Why are you choosing
to stay on the street?
86
00:11:27,750 --> 00:11:28,500
Well--
87
00:11:28,790 --> 00:11:29,790
Huh?
88
00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:34,340
I guess the only
objective is eating,
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00:11:34,630 --> 00:11:38,630
and happiness, and community.
90
00:11:38,920 --> 00:11:42,090
What do you mean eating?
91
00:11:42,390 --> 00:11:50,520
And I feed myself,
and I have a good attitude,
92
00:11:50,810 --> 00:11:52,690
and I just go
wherever I want to go.
93
00:11:52,980 --> 00:11:55,310
You can wander around
and see so many things
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00:11:55,610 --> 00:11:57,860
and meet so many people
that none of that
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00:11:58,150 --> 00:11:59,900
could ever occur if I were--
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00:12:00,190 --> 00:12:05,410
if I were just staying in one
place, working for one person.
97
00:12:05,700 --> 00:12:08,790
I've gone through quite a
big portion of North America.
98
00:12:09,080 --> 00:12:12,460
I'm just exploring,
just meeting people.
99
00:12:12,750 --> 00:12:13,420
Hey, man, you got a Sharpie.
100
00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:19,300
I really couldn't
answer and say when
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00:12:19,590 --> 00:12:24,180
I'll be done traveling or living
on the street in this way.
102
00:12:24,470 --> 00:12:26,970
But anywhere I am, something
likely amazing happens.
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00:12:31,100 --> 00:12:32,730
My name is Jared.
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00:12:33,020 --> 00:12:33,940
Jared.
105
00:12:34,230 --> 00:12:37,570
And this is my
buddy here Jong.
106
00:12:37,860 --> 00:12:39,150
My name is Dylan.
107
00:12:39,440 --> 00:12:40,150
Dylan.
Nice to meet you.
108
00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:41,110
Nice to meet you, man.
109
00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:43,070
My name NANFU.
110
00:12:44,700 --> 00:12:46,240
That's cool.
111
00:12:46,530 --> 00:12:47,830
So you're from Utah, you said?
- Yeah.
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00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:48,740
Originally?
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00:12:49,040 --> 00:12:49,790
Yeah.
114
00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:50,830
What part did you say?
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00:12:51,120 --> 00:12:52,410
Just north of Salt Lake City.
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00:12:52,710 --> 00:12:53,790
Did you grow up Mormon?
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00:12:54,080 --> 00:12:58,130
Uh, yeah, for a minute.
118
00:12:58,420 --> 00:12:59,000
For a hot minute?
119
00:12:59,300 --> 00:13:00,840
Yeah, for a hot minute.
120
00:13:01,130 --> 00:13:02,220
You are welcome
to stay the night.
121
00:13:02,510 --> 00:13:03,130
Neat.
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00:13:03,420 --> 00:13:04,720
That's a pullout.
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00:13:05,010 --> 00:13:11,140
She needs a good rest,
so she's earned it.
124
00:13:11,430 --> 00:13:13,350
One of the first people
to buy here in the 1960s.
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00:13:13,640 --> 00:13:14,440
Jared had
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00:13:14,730 --> 00:13:15,900
known us for just a few hours.
127
00:13:16,190 --> 00:13:17,310
You guys want a beer?
128
00:13:17,610 --> 00:13:19,480
But he invited us home.
129
00:13:19,770 --> 00:13:22,740
It had been days since
I slept under a roof.
130
00:13:23,030 --> 00:13:24,070
So I've been there.
131
00:13:24,360 --> 00:13:25,910
You know, I've been
traveling by myself.
132
00:13:26,200 --> 00:13:27,110
I've had no place to stay.
133
00:13:27,410 --> 00:13:28,620
So I just figured
I'd extend a hand.
134
00:13:28,910 --> 00:13:31,290
And I like him, you know?
135
00:13:31,580 --> 00:13:32,790
He's a funny cat, man.
136
00:13:33,080 --> 00:13:36,000
You know, he's young,
and he's finding himself.
137
00:13:36,290 --> 00:13:40,040
It's tough living life on
the street and on the roads.
138
00:13:40,340 --> 00:13:42,880
Jared
took us to dinner that night.
139
00:13:43,170 --> 00:13:47,090
I told myself one day I'd
come back and thank him.
140
00:13:47,390 --> 00:13:48,970
But I don't even
remember where he lived.
141
00:13:52,060 --> 00:13:53,390
Am in the camera?
142
00:13:53,680 --> 00:13:55,890
Yeah.
143
00:13:56,190 --> 00:13:57,480
- A beer, right?
- A Budweiser, please.
144
00:13:57,770 --> 00:13:58,810
- Budweiser.
- Thank you.
145
00:14:05,650 --> 00:14:06,490
Oh, OK.
146
00:14:39,310 --> 00:14:40,150
Oh, OK.
147
00:14:45,610 --> 00:14:48,400
Oh, yeah, yeah.
148
00:14:48,700 --> 00:14:50,200
I hadn't told my family
149
00:14:50,490 --> 00:14:53,080
that I was living on the
streets with someone I just
150
00:14:53,370 --> 00:14:56,950
met and wasn't involved with.
151
00:14:57,250 --> 00:14:59,370
They wouldn't understand
why a homeless person
152
00:14:59,670 --> 00:15:01,380
would be worth following.
153
00:15:01,670 --> 00:15:04,550
The idea that someone
would choose to be homeless
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00:15:04,840 --> 00:15:06,760
would be inconceivable to them.
155
00:15:07,050 --> 00:15:10,890
But this was a kind of freedom
I had never encountered before.
156
00:15:18,180 --> 00:15:21,270
Everywhere we went, I was
amazed by how many people
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00:15:21,560 --> 00:15:23,060
were interested in this life.
158
00:15:23,360 --> 00:15:24,190
- Don or Dylan?
- Dylan.
159
00:15:24,480 --> 00:15:25,650
Dylan.
160
00:15:25,940 --> 00:15:28,110
How long are you
planning to do this?
161
00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:29,150
I don't know, man.
162
00:15:29,450 --> 00:15:31,450
I have no idea.
163
00:15:31,740 --> 00:15:33,700
I'll see where
the road takes me.
164
00:15:33,990 --> 00:15:35,080
I'm just fascinated.
165
00:15:35,370 --> 00:15:36,990
So what made you like--
did someone else do
166
00:15:37,290 --> 00:15:39,160
this that you decided to do it?
167
00:15:39,460 --> 00:15:40,830
I wondered
168
00:15:41,120 --> 00:15:44,630
if the presence of my camera
affected how people behave.
169
00:15:44,920 --> 00:15:47,210
So sometimes I would
retreat from Dylan
170
00:15:47,510 --> 00:15:48,840
and wait until
something happened.
171
00:15:51,590 --> 00:15:54,550
This guy met Dylan in
front of a coffee shop
172
00:15:54,850 --> 00:15:58,220
while I was sitting inside
charging my battery.
173
00:15:58,520 --> 00:15:59,930
They talked for hours.
174
00:16:00,230 --> 00:16:02,190
And then he invited
Dylan to his home.
175
00:16:02,480 --> 00:16:04,270
We were just carrying
a conversation,
176
00:16:04,560 --> 00:16:06,230
and we got something in
common with a hostile.
177
00:16:06,520 --> 00:16:09,610
I stayed in a hostile
that was in California.
178
00:16:09,900 --> 00:16:13,110
I just decided that it was good
to have some money to give.
179
00:16:13,410 --> 00:16:15,950
It just makes me feel
good to be able to--
180
00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:18,910
makes me feel good it
you can help somebody.
181
00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:22,330
What part of
his story interested you?
182
00:16:22,620 --> 00:16:24,830
Well, I guess the way--
183
00:16:25,130 --> 00:16:27,710
the choices he makes.
184
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:29,590
Street life was
185
00:16:29,880 --> 00:16:33,130
free and exciting for Dylan.
186
00:16:33,430 --> 00:16:35,220
But it wasn't that
way for everyone.
187
00:16:40,310 --> 00:16:43,390
Why were people so generous to
Dylan, but not to the others?
188
00:16:47,360 --> 00:16:49,820
I began to realize the
privilege of choosing
189
00:16:50,110 --> 00:16:53,110
to be on the streets,
which includes both of us.
190
00:17:54,170 --> 00:17:55,970
A little
something to get people here.
191
00:17:56,260 --> 00:17:58,470
Who came here a member?
192
00:17:59,930 --> 00:18:01,970
Who
came-- did anybody
193
00:18:02,260 --> 00:18:03,970
come to meet with God tonight?
194
00:18:07,310 --> 00:18:09,440
Well, we're glad that you
chose to come here tonight.
195
00:18:09,730 --> 00:18:11,190
Who has been here
before and decided
196
00:18:11,480 --> 00:18:12,940
they might come back again?
197
00:18:14,740 --> 00:18:16,360
All right, well, I think
we're in the right place.
198
00:18:16,650 --> 00:18:17,700
So let's pray over the meal.
199
00:18:17,990 --> 00:18:19,490
Father, I thank you for tonight.
200
00:18:19,780 --> 00:18:20,660
I think you--
201
00:18:20,950 --> 00:18:21,530
I just love--
202
00:18:21,830 --> 00:18:22,950
I love humanity.
203
00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:25,250
I'm here experiencing
humanity at its most.
204
00:18:25,540 --> 00:18:30,080
Do you have like any
type of like legal issues
205
00:18:30,380 --> 00:18:32,000
in your background that--
206
00:18:32,290 --> 00:18:34,050
that would, you know, add--
207
00:18:34,340 --> 00:18:35,050
I'm just curious, to like--
208
00:18:35,340 --> 00:18:36,340
Nothing extreme.
209
00:18:36,630 --> 00:18:39,640
I mean, I made a
lot of mistakes.
210
00:18:39,930 --> 00:18:41,970
By the time I was 14, I
was on heroin and selling
211
00:18:42,260 --> 00:18:44,640
drugs till about 20 years old.
212
00:18:44,930 --> 00:18:46,560
I mean, I'm
assuming you probably
213
00:18:46,850 --> 00:18:47,940
have maybe some
high school or you
214
00:18:48,230 --> 00:18:49,440
may have finished high school?
215
00:18:49,730 --> 00:18:50,900
I finished high
school-- did some college.
216
00:18:51,190 --> 00:18:51,980
OK.
217
00:18:52,270 --> 00:18:54,360
I quit college,
because I mean,
218
00:18:54,650 --> 00:18:56,820
I can learn more in a library
than I could at a school,
219
00:18:57,110 --> 00:18:58,900
studying what I'm
interested in for free.
220
00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:00,660
The point I'm
trying to bring out
221
00:19:00,950 --> 00:19:05,870
is that it's going to be that
much harder for you basically
222
00:19:06,160 --> 00:19:09,710
putting this on your resume
when you're trying to get a job.
223
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:11,580
I mean, I'm having a
hard enough time myself.
224
00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:13,420
I don't feel as
if I'm doing wrong.
225
00:19:13,710 --> 00:19:15,800
Maybe I'm doing different
than anybody else would think.
226
00:19:16,090 --> 00:19:16,880
But man-- I'm--
227
00:19:17,170 --> 00:19:18,130
No, it's not that.
228
00:19:18,420 --> 00:19:19,630
I'm whole.
229
00:19:19,930 --> 00:19:20,680
Right, no, I'm not
saying you're doing wrong.
230
00:19:20,970 --> 00:19:22,010
I know that.
I know.
231
00:19:22,300 --> 00:19:23,430
But yeah, no, I'm
just saying, you know--
232
00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:25,100
I'm just telling how
I-- how I feel about it.
233
00:19:25,390 --> 00:19:28,930
You know, it just-- it just
seems like, you know, like--
234
00:19:29,230 --> 00:19:30,810
the easier way out.
235
00:19:31,100 --> 00:19:32,610
For now, I'm only 22.
236
00:19:32,900 --> 00:19:35,150
Fuck, I feel like a
237
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:37,110
100-year-old person.
238
00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:40,780
I mean, I've been through a
lot, I've lived through a lot,
239
00:19:41,070 --> 00:19:43,740
and experienced a lot of
beautiful and ugly places.
240
00:19:44,030 --> 00:19:45,200
Dylan told me later
241
00:19:45,490 --> 00:19:47,240
that he was angry
for the condescension
242
00:19:47,540 --> 00:19:49,460
he felt from this person.
243
00:19:49,750 --> 00:19:52,920
He told me how much he resented
the judgment religious people
244
00:19:53,210 --> 00:19:56,000
had shown him in his life.
245
00:19:56,300 --> 00:19:58,380
But I was amazed by
how comfortable he
246
00:19:58,670 --> 00:20:01,470
seemed in situations like this.
247
00:20:01,760 --> 00:20:03,470
Hallelujah, holy,
248
00:20:03,760 --> 00:20:08,560
holy, God almighty, great I am.
249
00:20:08,850 --> 00:20:09,430
I'm so sorry.
250
00:20:14,650 --> 00:20:15,770
This is Dylan.
251
00:20:16,070 --> 00:20:17,020
Hi, Dylan, welcome.
252
00:20:17,320 --> 00:20:17,900
God bless you.
253
00:20:18,190 --> 00:20:19,150
And who is your friend?
254
00:20:19,440 --> 00:20:20,820
This is NANFU.
255
00:20:21,110 --> 00:20:22,320
Hi.
256
00:20:22,610 --> 00:20:23,570
- Hi, NANFU.
- And what are you doing?
257
00:20:23,860 --> 00:20:24,780
Just taking some shots.
258
00:20:25,070 --> 00:20:26,620
Filming
yeah, him, yeah.
259
00:20:26,910 --> 00:20:27,700
Oh, is he-- is he--
260
00:20:27,990 --> 00:20:28,620
Our journey.
261
00:20:28,910 --> 00:20:29,660
It's a journey.
262
00:20:29,950 --> 00:20:30,960
Oh, thank you for coming today.
263
00:20:31,250 --> 00:20:32,250
Fantastic!
264
00:20:32,540 --> 00:20:33,540
Come on in.
265
00:20:33,830 --> 00:20:36,000
Well, look who's back in town.
266
00:20:36,290 --> 00:20:39,000
They don't want to
filmed-- those two.
267
00:20:39,300 --> 00:20:40,760
Jesus, we come to you, Lord.
268
00:20:41,050 --> 00:20:44,390
Give us our gifts
of..
269
00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:47,510
It's just like a cast
on us and our mind.
270
00:20:47,810 --> 00:20:51,270
We want to have that fix
that you can give us.
271
00:20:51,560 --> 00:20:53,440
When we ask for
forgiveness for whatever
272
00:20:53,730 --> 00:20:55,810
we've done to somebody--
if we..
273
00:20:56,110 --> 00:20:58,650
For whatever reason you
have him on this journey, Lord
274
00:20:58,940 --> 00:21:02,700
God, we just want to pray
your holy spirit will capture
275
00:21:02,990 --> 00:21:09,290
his heart, and capture his mind,
and capture Dylan, and turn him
276
00:21:09,580 --> 00:21:10,740
into the man that you have--
277
00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:13,830
you have designed
him to become, Lord.
278
00:21:14,120 --> 00:21:15,750
And he is seeking.
279
00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:18,130
He is on a quest, Lord Jesus.
280
00:21:18,420 --> 00:21:20,340
I pray that you will
just give him the answers
281
00:21:20,630 --> 00:21:21,880
that he's looking for, Lord.
282
00:21:22,170 --> 00:21:24,170
We pray your favor upon Dylan.
283
00:21:24,470 --> 00:21:27,180
We pray that salvation,
healing, and deliverance
284
00:21:27,470 --> 00:21:30,810
will come to Dylan's
body, soul, and spirit.
285
00:21:31,100 --> 00:21:34,390
And to his friend, also,
Lord, we just pray for her.
286
00:21:34,690 --> 00:21:37,690
We pray that as they
travel together, that Lord,
287
00:21:37,980 --> 00:21:40,230
you would put a hedge of
protection around them
288
00:21:40,520 --> 00:21:44,570
and that, Lord, your spirit
will fall upon them like it did
289
00:21:44,860 --> 00:21:47,240
when you fell upon.
290
00:21:47,530 --> 00:21:50,330
And we just bleed your blood,
Jesus, over their lives,
291
00:21:50,620 --> 00:21:52,410
over their hearts,
and their minds,
292
00:21:52,700 --> 00:21:54,750
and their emotions,
Lord, and we say
293
00:21:55,040 --> 00:21:56,330
thank you, Lord,
for the opportunity
294
00:21:56,620 --> 00:21:59,250
to pray and bless
them, in Jesus' name.
295
00:22:03,420 --> 00:22:07,180
- I
- typically never make a sign.
296
00:22:07,470 --> 00:22:11,220
But I figured, why not?
297
00:22:11,510 --> 00:22:15,730
A simple sign manifested into
encountering this man, George.
298
00:22:16,020 --> 00:22:17,060
How do you like
the United States?
299
00:22:17,350 --> 00:22:18,940
- You like it?
- Yeah.
300
00:22:19,230 --> 00:22:21,400
He
offered me the $50 bonus
301
00:22:21,690 --> 00:22:25,610
to tour a luxury timeshare
in North Beach, Miami.
302
00:22:25,900 --> 00:22:28,740
Guys, um, I need you to
come over here for a minute--
303
00:22:29,030 --> 00:22:30,280
just initial this.
304
00:22:30,570 --> 00:22:31,700
It
required a bit of paperwork
305
00:22:31,990 --> 00:22:36,500
and fibbing as far as my
occupation and salary.
306
00:22:36,790 --> 00:22:37,830
So what?
307
00:22:38,120 --> 00:22:40,880
I could use $50 to
help myself and to help
308
00:22:41,170 --> 00:22:44,920
this man make a few dollars
off of referring me.
309
00:22:45,210 --> 00:22:46,670
Hey, you got to wash
your hands, all right?
310
00:22:46,970 --> 00:22:47,590
Come on.
311
00:22:49,090 --> 00:22:49,640
There's your ID.
312
00:23:04,530 --> 00:23:05,980
OK?
313
00:23:06,280 --> 00:23:09,110
You've got to finish the tour
in order to get the gift.
314
00:23:09,410 --> 00:23:11,120
So an hour, hour
and a half, they're
315
00:23:11,410 --> 00:23:13,700
going to have snacks up there.
316
00:23:13,990 --> 00:23:15,740
They're going to tell you
about a vacation club,
317
00:23:16,040 --> 00:23:17,500
and you know, if
you like it, buy it.
318
00:23:17,790 --> 00:23:19,790
If you don't-- if you don't make
spur of the moment decisions,
319
00:23:20,080 --> 00:23:22,080
whatever it is that you do
or don't do, it's up to you.
320
00:23:22,380 --> 00:23:23,960
You don't have to buy
anything for the gift.
321
00:23:24,250 --> 00:23:25,800
OK?
322
00:23:26,090 --> 00:23:27,050
Thank you, again.
323
00:23:27,340 --> 00:23:28,470
I'll be here when
you get done, OK?
324
00:23:28,760 --> 00:23:30,260
I'll be here waiting to pay you.
325
00:23:30,550 --> 00:23:31,800
OK.
326
00:23:32,090 --> 00:23:36,060
Maybe
about a 25 minute van ride.
327
00:23:36,350 --> 00:23:39,480
And you end up at this
beautiful facility.
328
00:23:39,770 --> 00:23:43,650
Sure, I'll pretend to be a
hot shot, wealthy young guy,
329
00:23:43,940 --> 00:23:46,780
covered in dirt, stinky.
330
00:24:17,220 --> 00:24:20,140
The pressure of the
older one is always good.
331
00:24:27,320 --> 00:24:28,780
OK, cool.
332
00:24:29,070 --> 00:24:31,030
I told
her I was a master carpenter.
333
00:24:31,320 --> 00:24:33,160
That was my way of
explaining my hands
334
00:24:33,450 --> 00:24:36,660
being all dirty and stained.
335
00:24:36,950 --> 00:24:40,120
Right on.
336
00:24:40,410 --> 00:24:47,250
Yeah?
337
00:24:47,540 --> 00:24:49,380
Oh, that's good.
338
00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:05,020
The $50 Dylan
339
00:25:05,310 --> 00:25:09,190
earned last for a few days,
maybe beyond the few days
340
00:25:09,480 --> 00:25:11,150
I had with him on the streets.
341
00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:14,860
But he decided to go to
a restaurant for dinner.
342
00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:18,660
And the rest of the
money he gave away.
343
00:25:18,950 --> 00:25:21,830
After a few minutes,
not surprisingly,
344
00:25:22,120 --> 00:25:23,830
Dylan became friends
with the people
345
00:25:24,120 --> 00:25:27,500
sitting at the next table.
346
00:25:27,790 --> 00:25:28,500
What's your name?
347
00:25:28,790 --> 00:25:29,630
I'm Dylan.
348
00:25:29,920 --> 00:25:30,590
Dylan? nice to meet you.
Uri.
349
00:25:30,880 --> 00:25:31,460
Uri?
350
00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:32,460
Uri, yeah.
351
00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:38,430
That's my grandma.
352
00:25:38,720 --> 00:25:39,890
That's your grandma?
353
00:25:40,180 --> 00:25:41,390
My mom.
354
00:25:41,680 --> 00:25:42,890
This is my mom.
355
00:25:51,530 --> 00:25:53,240
Nice to meet you all.
356
00:25:53,530 --> 00:25:54,700
They gave Dylan $20
357
00:25:54,990 --> 00:25:56,530
and their contact information,
358
00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:02,290
I promise.
359
00:26:09,130 --> 00:26:09,920
I hope not.
360
00:26:10,210 --> 00:26:11,000
But--
361
00:26:11,300 --> 00:26:13,510
Yes.
362
00:26:13,800 --> 00:26:14,380
All right.
363
00:26:14,670 --> 00:26:17,380
All right.
364
00:26:17,680 --> 00:26:18,390
I love it.
365
00:26:18,680 --> 00:26:19,390
I love it.
366
00:26:19,680 --> 00:26:20,890
Absolutely.
367
00:26:21,180 --> 00:26:22,350
You guys have
a beautiful night.
368
00:26:22,640 --> 00:26:23,350
Thank you.
You too.
369
00:26:23,640 --> 00:26:24,270
Bye.
370
00:27:21,030 --> 00:27:22,490
- I
- was worried that we would
371
00:27:22,780 --> 00:27:25,240
be kicked out of this park.
372
00:27:25,540 --> 00:27:30,370
Sure enough, I got
woken up by the police.
373
00:27:30,670 --> 00:27:32,330
Fuck!
374
00:27:32,630 --> 00:27:33,960
You can cavity search me.
375
00:29:16,150 --> 00:29:17,690
Before we headed north,
376
00:29:17,980 --> 00:29:20,440
I went to a bathroom in the
bagel shop to clean myself.
377
00:29:23,950 --> 00:29:25,740
It took me so long
in the bathroom
378
00:29:26,030 --> 00:29:29,370
that the staff noticed
and questioned me.
379
00:29:29,660 --> 00:29:33,290
I told them about Dylan
and that I was filming him.
380
00:29:33,580 --> 00:29:38,750
Dylan, some
bagels for us on the road.
381
00:29:39,040 --> 00:29:41,880
Do you want to come in
and say thank you to them?
382
00:29:42,170 --> 00:29:43,510
I don't know why
he's in that situation,
383
00:29:43,800 --> 00:29:45,180
but for whatever
reason, he's there.
384
00:29:45,470 --> 00:29:47,390
So why not help?
385
00:29:47,680 --> 00:29:48,890
How much
money did you give him?
386
00:29:49,180 --> 00:29:50,390
Just $5. $5.
387
00:29:50,680 --> 00:29:52,890
Then like a half pack of smokes.
388
00:29:53,180 --> 00:29:54,390
Then we give him some
bagels and stuff.
389
00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:56,730
That was the boss's idea there.
390
00:29:57,020 --> 00:30:00,110
You know, just some bagels
and some cream cheese.
391
00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:02,650
Heard he was living on
the streets and hungry.
392
00:30:02,940 --> 00:30:04,110
So you know, why
not help someone?
393
00:30:06,490 --> 00:30:07,570
Soon after, we
394
00:30:07,860 --> 00:30:09,120
were back on the road.
395
00:30:09,410 --> 00:30:11,870
Dylan decided to
sell the bagels.
396
00:30:12,160 --> 00:30:13,750
No one wanted a bagel.
397
00:30:14,040 --> 00:30:15,080
But many people
gave him the money.
398
00:30:18,210 --> 00:30:20,210
What did you tell him?
399
00:30:20,500 --> 00:30:22,960
I said, you do
you need a bagel for $1?
400
00:30:23,260 --> 00:30:24,260
I'm trying to hit this bus.
401
00:30:24,550 --> 00:30:25,170
And he was like, hold on.
402
00:30:25,470 --> 00:30:26,880
Hold on.
403
00:30:27,180 --> 00:30:29,340
He went inside and bought some
beer and came back with $1.
404
00:30:29,640 --> 00:30:31,350
But he didn't ask for a bagel.
405
00:30:35,520 --> 00:30:37,140
- I
- was annoyed that Dylan wanted
406
00:30:37,440 --> 00:30:39,190
to get rid of the bagels.
407
00:30:39,480 --> 00:30:41,400
I felt that he was
ungrateful for the kindness
408
00:30:41,690 --> 00:30:43,650
people showed him.
409
00:30:43,940 --> 00:30:46,900
I felt disgusted that I
lost interest in filming
410
00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:50,490
and gave him the camera.
411
00:30:50,780 --> 00:30:52,490
When I first met
Dylan, he seemed
412
00:30:52,780 --> 00:30:54,700
like a symbol for
the free America
413
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:57,750
I had always heard about.
414
00:30:58,040 --> 00:31:01,290
But the longer I spent observing
how he used his freedom,
415
00:31:01,590 --> 00:31:02,210
my feelings changed.
416
00:31:05,590 --> 00:31:06,880
Can you spare a dollar?
417
00:31:32,910 --> 00:31:34,330
I don't eat
that much food.
418
00:31:34,620 --> 00:31:37,000
I don't want to carry
that around for so long,
419
00:31:37,290 --> 00:31:40,580
I don't want to have to
take three shits a day.
420
00:31:40,870 --> 00:31:44,090
I'm not going to get any
money from anybody or food
421
00:31:44,380 --> 00:31:48,420
if I'm carrying a big
bag of bagels around.
422
00:31:48,720 --> 00:31:51,510
My objective is
drinking right now.
423
00:31:51,800 --> 00:31:55,760
And now I have to beg
again, which I never beg.
424
00:31:56,060 --> 00:31:57,970
I have to beg today
to get some beer--
425
00:32:03,650 --> 00:32:06,820
so I can think straight enough
to know what's bothering me.
426
00:32:10,240 --> 00:32:11,450
So you
already knew the answer.
427
00:32:11,740 --> 00:32:15,200
You already knew it, right?
428
00:32:15,490 --> 00:32:16,660
I need to drink
and think about it.
429
00:32:21,620 --> 00:32:24,420
It doesn't involve
you, but I just
430
00:32:24,710 --> 00:32:28,210
still need to think about it.
431
00:32:28,510 --> 00:32:30,170
When
he threw away the bagels,
432
00:32:30,470 --> 00:32:32,760
I couldn't stand it.
433
00:32:33,050 --> 00:32:34,680
We had an argument.
434
00:32:34,970 --> 00:32:37,760
I criticized him for taking
advantage of people's kindness.
435
00:32:42,640 --> 00:32:44,690
But then I thought to myself--
436
00:32:44,980 --> 00:32:47,770
was I the one who was taking
advantage of him by filming?
437
00:32:50,820 --> 00:32:55,240
Shortly after this, my
trip with Dylan ended.
438
00:32:55,530 --> 00:32:56,990
Dylan stayed on the streets.
439
00:32:57,280 --> 00:32:59,330
And I went back to
my life in New York.
440
00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:10,590
Everything looked
different after the trip.
441
00:33:19,970 --> 00:33:21,810
My few weeks on the
streets showed me
442
00:33:22,100 --> 00:33:27,810
that my everyday worries from
before all seemed pointless.
443
00:33:28,110 --> 00:33:32,530
I knew that whatever
happened, I could survive.
444
00:33:32,820 --> 00:33:36,490
I soon became busy making a
film about Chinese human rights.
445
00:33:39,450 --> 00:33:42,620
The survival skills I learned
on the streets with Dylan
446
00:33:42,910 --> 00:33:46,330
became useful as I was on
the run across China chased
447
00:33:46,620 --> 00:33:48,330
by the police.
448
00:33:48,630 --> 00:33:50,840
I often find myself
comparing my experience
449
00:33:51,130 --> 00:33:53,130
filming in both countries.
450
00:33:53,420 --> 00:33:55,590
I felt safer sleeping
on the streets
451
00:33:55,880 --> 00:34:00,140
than I did traveling in
China on buses and trains.
452
00:34:00,430 --> 00:34:02,640
Two years quickly went by.
453
00:34:02,930 --> 00:34:05,890
I often wondered what
would happen to Dylan
454
00:34:06,190 --> 00:34:07,270
and if I would see him again.
455
00:34:40,800 --> 00:34:41,680
I started
456
00:34:41,970 --> 00:34:44,520
doing these around 2013.
457
00:34:44,810 --> 00:34:47,060
What I would do is
in between calls
458
00:34:47,350 --> 00:34:50,110
or when I was on call and
driving around in my work
459
00:34:50,400 --> 00:34:53,690
truck, I would just take the
GoPro to one of the windows
460
00:34:53,980 --> 00:34:56,990
and just say what
was on my mind.
461
00:34:57,280 --> 00:34:58,740
It is a beautiful day.
462
00:35:01,620 --> 00:35:03,660
Got to enjoy those
every chance you get.
463
00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:37,400
I am headed out to do some
scouting on a target house--
464
00:35:41,740 --> 00:35:44,530
a little bit.
465
00:35:44,830 --> 00:35:50,210
And then I got to pick
up some new handcuffs,
466
00:35:50,500 --> 00:35:59,090
because mine got stuck on
the last guy I arrested.
467
00:35:59,380 --> 00:36:01,630
And that's really upsetting,
because I've had that pair
468
00:36:01,930 --> 00:36:03,850
of handcuffs for 24 years--
469
00:36:04,140 --> 00:36:04,720
an entire career.
470
00:36:13,810 --> 00:36:15,940
Two
years after I first met Dylan,
471
00:36:16,230 --> 00:36:18,280
I traveled to Utah
for the first time
472
00:36:18,570 --> 00:36:22,570
for the Chinese human rights
film I was working on.
473
00:36:22,860 --> 00:36:24,990
I remembered that
Dylan was from Utah,
474
00:36:25,280 --> 00:36:27,240
and I was curious to
see if I could learn
475
00:36:27,540 --> 00:36:31,460
more about where he came from.
476
00:36:42,590 --> 00:36:47,260
I have
lots of disks where
477
00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:50,230
I have recorded my thoughts--
478
00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:53,270
just like a video journal.
479
00:36:53,560 --> 00:37:01,650
And there's a lot of things that
are special to me, you know,
480
00:37:01,950 --> 00:37:06,700
that I am glad I
have documented.
481
00:37:06,990 --> 00:37:09,490
ICAC search warrant
Park City, Utah.
482
00:37:18,130 --> 00:37:18,920
Police!
483
00:37:19,210 --> 00:37:19,920
Search warrant!
484
00:37:29,640 --> 00:37:30,430
Search warrant!
Police!
485
00:37:30,720 --> 00:37:31,310
Search warrant.
486
00:37:31,600 --> 00:37:32,230
Police!
487
00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:33,430
Search warrant!
488
00:37:33,730 --> 00:37:36,980
I've been a
detective since 2011.
489
00:37:37,270 --> 00:37:39,980
I investigate sex crimes.
490
00:37:40,280 --> 00:37:42,570
I'm also assigned to
investigate internet crimes
491
00:37:42,860 --> 00:37:43,820
against children.
492
00:37:44,110 --> 00:37:46,240
We'll execute a search warrant.
493
00:37:46,530 --> 00:37:51,410
High 90% of the time, we find
evidence of child pornography.
494
00:37:51,700 --> 00:37:54,000
Well, the first
several times, I had
495
00:37:54,290 --> 00:37:58,420
to review material,
because I can't say, well,
496
00:37:58,710 --> 00:38:00,000
I think this is child porn.
497
00:38:00,300 --> 00:38:02,670
I have to review it and
make sure what it is.
498
00:38:02,960 --> 00:38:04,340
And I have to be
able to describe
499
00:38:04,630 --> 00:38:07,340
a number of images and videos.
500
00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:10,640
So the first time I did
have to do those reviews,
501
00:38:10,930 --> 00:38:12,600
I got some vicarious trauma.
502
00:38:12,890 --> 00:38:14,640
And I don't cry hardly ever.
503
00:38:14,930 --> 00:38:21,150
I sat down at my desk one
day and just started to cry.
504
00:38:21,440 --> 00:38:25,110
This was a way to get
those things off my chest.
505
00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:26,900
Even though I'm only
talking to myself,
506
00:38:27,200 --> 00:38:30,830
I couldn't talk to
other people about it.
507
00:38:31,120 --> 00:38:33,240
Every once in a while,
I'd wake up really early,
508
00:38:33,540 --> 00:38:34,830
and I just couldn't
go back to bed.
509
00:38:35,120 --> 00:38:37,960
So I decided just go to work.
510
00:38:38,250 --> 00:38:41,590
I started the camera
from my driveway.
511
00:38:41,880 --> 00:38:43,920
And it was super dark, so
you can't see anything.
512
00:38:44,210 --> 00:38:47,220
But you could hear what
I was talking about.
513
00:38:47,510 --> 00:38:48,130
I have three kids.
514
00:38:52,220 --> 00:38:54,270
My youngest is 15.
515
00:38:54,560 --> 00:38:56,140
He gets straight A's in school--
516
00:38:56,430 --> 00:38:57,020
very smart.
517
00:38:59,770 --> 00:39:06,400
My daughter is working on
graduating from college.
518
00:39:06,690 --> 00:39:09,410
She's so kind hearted and good.
519
00:39:09,700 --> 00:39:12,700
And my oldest boy--
520
00:39:12,990 --> 00:39:13,700
he's 23.
521
00:39:16,910 --> 00:39:20,670
He's been a transient
all around the country.
522
00:39:32,050 --> 00:39:36,770
No parent wants their child
to be homeless on the street.
523
00:39:37,060 --> 00:39:39,190
I think when you're a parent,
you want your children
524
00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:40,850
to be kind like you.
525
00:39:41,150 --> 00:39:46,400
He looks just like I did when
I was his age or younger.
526
00:39:46,690 --> 00:39:49,150
We have a lot of similarities
in our voice and the way
527
00:39:49,450 --> 00:39:51,110
that we really
care about people.
528
00:39:53,910 --> 00:39:58,620
All three of my children grew
up with the same expectations
529
00:39:58,910 --> 00:40:00,000
and the same knowledge.
530
00:40:00,290 --> 00:40:02,080
And they all turned out
so very differently.
531
00:40:13,680 --> 00:40:17,640
I'm kind
of a religious person.
532
00:40:17,930 --> 00:40:19,350
Well, I'm actually a
very religious person.
533
00:40:22,440 --> 00:40:24,110
I wouldn't dream of
breaking the rules.
534
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:27,110
But Dylan is all
out there happily
535
00:40:27,400 --> 00:40:30,860
breaking all the rules that he
can get away with, you know?
536
00:40:31,150 --> 00:40:34,910
I feel like if he has a sense
of freedom with breaking rules,
537
00:40:35,200 --> 00:40:36,330
you know?
538
00:40:36,620 --> 00:40:38,740
I don't think he likes
to be bound by anything.
539
00:40:39,040 --> 00:40:42,870
Or I don't think he likes
to be told what to do.
540
00:40:43,170 --> 00:40:45,670
The way I see homeless people is
people who made bad decisions,
541
00:40:45,960 --> 00:40:46,880
you know?
542
00:40:47,170 --> 00:40:48,170
And I'm sure if
they could go back,
543
00:40:48,460 --> 00:40:50,170
they'd change those
bad decisions.
544
00:40:53,260 --> 00:40:58,350
The way Ashton feels
was 100% totally his choice.
545
00:40:58,640 --> 00:41:01,060
He can do whatever he wants.
546
00:41:01,350 --> 00:41:03,390
Dylan, the same way.
547
00:41:03,690 --> 00:41:05,310
He has the freedom to choose.
548
00:41:12,700 --> 00:41:13,950
I learned that Dylan
549
00:41:14,240 --> 00:41:17,120
has a very loving family.
550
00:41:17,410 --> 00:41:22,410
I wondered what made him
choose to live on the streets.
551
00:41:22,710 --> 00:41:24,330
Part of
it is he hated Utah.
552
00:41:24,620 --> 00:41:26,130
He hated the local religion.
553
00:41:26,420 --> 00:41:29,170
And so he had made some friends.
554
00:41:29,460 --> 00:41:31,670
And they had different
philosophies.
555
00:41:31,960 --> 00:41:34,470
There was drug use
in those circles.
556
00:41:34,760 --> 00:41:37,930
His drug habit got
more and more intense.
557
00:41:38,220 --> 00:41:40,220
And he'd had some
psychological problems
558
00:41:40,520 --> 00:41:42,390
that we tried to deal with.
559
00:41:42,680 --> 00:41:44,850
He gets his
medications, and he'll
560
00:41:45,140 --> 00:41:47,270
go out and sell it for $300.
561
00:41:47,560 --> 00:41:50,440
So there was a lot
of frustrations,
562
00:41:50,730 --> 00:41:52,570
you know, what
can we do to help?
563
00:41:52,860 --> 00:41:55,110
When you have a child
you want to help,
564
00:41:55,400 --> 00:41:57,570
you've got to
simplify the rules.
565
00:41:57,870 --> 00:41:59,330
And I had simple rules--
566
00:41:59,620 --> 00:42:02,830
don't bring drugs into my house.
567
00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:06,580
And I made him come up
with the consequence.
568
00:42:06,870 --> 00:42:08,630
All right, so if you
violate these rules.
569
00:42:08,920 --> 00:42:09,790
What's the consequences?
570
00:42:10,090 --> 00:42:10,800
He came up with it.
571
00:42:11,090 --> 00:42:12,550
He said, I'm out.
572
00:42:12,840 --> 00:42:17,970
And so there was a time when I
found some things in his room
573
00:42:18,260 --> 00:42:19,220
here.
574
00:42:19,510 --> 00:42:24,020
I just-- and I
pointed it out to him.
575
00:42:24,310 --> 00:42:26,890
And I said, well, what's
going to happen now?
576
00:42:27,190 --> 00:42:27,810
He says, dad, I don't know.
577
00:42:28,100 --> 00:42:30,480
I got to go.
578
00:42:30,770 --> 00:42:32,650
He told me, just drop
me off in the mountains
579
00:42:32,940 --> 00:42:34,070
or driving up on 89--
580
00:42:34,360 --> 00:42:35,490
just drop me off
in the mountains.
581
00:42:35,780 --> 00:42:38,990
I said, I can't drop you
off in the mountains.
582
00:42:39,280 --> 00:42:43,410
He said, it's getting cold,
and you'll die of exposure.
583
00:42:43,700 --> 00:42:49,920
So I bought him a bus
ticket to San Diego.
584
00:42:50,210 --> 00:42:53,130
And I looked up
every social service
585
00:42:53,420 --> 00:42:57,970
program that can help him that
was in the San Diego area.
586
00:42:58,260 --> 00:43:00,340
I printed those up with maps.
587
00:43:00,640 --> 00:43:03,760
I had his whole itinerary
of being homeless planned.
588
00:43:04,060 --> 00:43:05,220
Here's where the bus station is.
589
00:43:05,520 --> 00:43:07,690
Here's where you
can get some food.
590
00:43:07,980 --> 00:43:10,900
Here's where someone can
help you to get a job.
591
00:43:11,190 --> 00:43:14,530
He was excited to go in a way.
592
00:43:14,820 --> 00:43:16,990
And I'm frightened.
593
00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:18,490
I'm terrified at this point.
594
00:43:22,780 --> 00:43:25,870
So at the end of
the day, I took him
595
00:43:26,160 --> 00:43:28,210
down to the Greyhound
station, and I
596
00:43:28,500 --> 00:43:30,540
had that $400 in my pocket.
597
00:43:30,830 --> 00:43:34,880
And I thought to myself, if
I just give him $400 here,
598
00:43:35,170 --> 00:43:37,670
and we part ways, he'll
be in downtown Salt
599
00:43:37,970 --> 00:43:39,840
Lake buying drugs.
600
00:43:40,130 --> 00:43:43,350
So I waited until he was in
line for the Greyhound bus.
601
00:44:05,700 --> 00:44:09,660
Then I gave him $400.
602
00:44:09,960 --> 00:44:13,210
I said, don't lose it.
603
00:44:13,500 --> 00:44:17,090
Don't lose any of this stuff.
604
00:44:17,380 --> 00:44:19,220
I want you to survive.
605
00:44:19,510 --> 00:44:21,220
And I trust--
606
00:44:21,510 --> 00:44:22,260
I trust you.
607
00:44:22,550 --> 00:44:23,720
I trust that you can survive.
608
00:44:40,240 --> 00:44:44,450
And I watched the bus go away.
609
00:44:44,740 --> 00:44:48,790
And I call that one of the
three saddest days of my life--
610
00:45:09,060 --> 00:45:11,520
one of them being
when Brendan died.
611
00:45:15,480 --> 00:45:19,530
My first son passed
away at birth.
612
00:45:19,820 --> 00:45:21,150
And that was tough.
613
00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:28,030
I remember going out to the
cemetery and just crying.
614
00:45:28,330 --> 00:45:30,240
I bathed his
headstone in my tears.
615
00:45:30,540 --> 00:45:33,040
I couldn't believe all
the bad things that have
616
00:45:33,330 --> 00:45:34,500
happened to me in my life--
617
00:45:39,420 --> 00:45:43,130
one of them being when the
woman that I was married
618
00:45:43,420 --> 00:45:46,050
to for 18 years
said she didn't want
619
00:45:46,340 --> 00:45:49,760
to be married to me anymore.
620
00:45:50,060 --> 00:45:53,180
I think the divorce was
really hard for Dylan.
621
00:46:07,160 --> 00:46:09,030
I think it might
have had effects on Dylan.
622
00:46:09,330 --> 00:46:12,330
But his behavior had
more effects on us.
623
00:46:12,620 --> 00:46:16,120
For me, I kind of had a
breakdown, because I didn't
624
00:46:16,420 --> 00:46:17,330
know what to do with him.
625
00:46:17,630 --> 00:46:19,210
John didn't know
what to do with him.
626
00:46:19,500 --> 00:46:22,460
And I think it strained
our relationship.
627
00:46:22,760 --> 00:46:23,960
Dylan's mother agreed
628
00:46:24,260 --> 00:46:26,090
to one interview with me.
629
00:46:26,380 --> 00:46:27,840
But she didn't want
to participate further
630
00:46:28,140 --> 00:46:31,180
in the film, because
reliving these memories
631
00:46:31,470 --> 00:46:33,520
was very painful for her.
632
00:46:33,810 --> 00:46:35,520
There's a lot of moms that
have homeless children that
633
00:46:35,810 --> 00:46:36,560
are addicts.
634
00:46:36,850 --> 00:46:38,560
And you never sleep at night.
635
00:46:38,850 --> 00:46:40,560
You always worry about them.
636
00:46:40,860 --> 00:46:43,070
As any mom with
an addicted child
637
00:46:43,360 --> 00:46:45,440
will tell you that every
time the phone rings,
638
00:46:45,740 --> 00:46:47,360
you wonder if that's the call.
639
00:46:47,660 --> 00:46:51,240
Every time there's a number
that you don't recognize,
640
00:46:51,530 --> 00:46:53,490
your heart drops,
because you know
641
00:46:53,790 --> 00:46:56,210
that someday there's a
possibility that you're
642
00:46:56,500 --> 00:46:58,580
going to get that call.
643
00:46:58,870 --> 00:47:02,750
And that's something I
worry about all the time.
644
00:47:08,050 --> 00:47:13,600
She was always convinced
that he was murdered somewhere.
645
00:47:13,890 --> 00:47:18,730
And I-- I would say to myself,
no, no if something that
646
00:47:19,020 --> 00:47:20,520
bad happened, somebody would--
647
00:47:20,810 --> 00:47:23,020
I know how law
enforcement works.
648
00:47:23,320 --> 00:47:24,650
They would have
figured out who he was.
649
00:47:24,940 --> 00:47:26,070
And I would have
got a phone call.
650
00:47:26,360 --> 00:47:29,910
So no news is good news,
but it was a long time.
651
00:47:30,200 --> 00:47:34,830
And I was just terrified,
worrying like, oh,
652
00:47:35,120 --> 00:47:36,370
my gosh, what did I do you?
653
00:47:36,660 --> 00:47:38,040
You know, I just--
654
00:47:38,330 --> 00:47:40,290
is he OK?
655
00:47:40,580 --> 00:47:42,710
What's wrong?
656
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:46,460
Until the first
time he called me.
657
00:47:46,760 --> 00:47:49,840
Oh, man, I was so glad
to hear his voice.
658
00:47:50,130 --> 00:47:52,640
And he said, guess where I'm at?
659
00:47:52,930 --> 00:47:57,100
He said he was on
somebody's boat.
660
00:47:57,390 --> 00:48:02,060
And they'd hired him to help
him work on the guy's boat
661
00:48:02,350 --> 00:48:03,560
and was paying him money.
662
00:48:03,860 --> 00:48:06,360
And I thought, oh,
my, gosh, hallelujah!
663
00:48:06,650 --> 00:48:07,570
OK.
664
00:48:07,860 --> 00:48:09,190
So now he's in a
place that he likes.
665
00:48:09,490 --> 00:48:12,240
And he has something
positive, you know?
666
00:48:12,530 --> 00:48:14,950
And that's the first time
I learned this is where
667
00:48:15,240 --> 00:48:17,200
Dylan just started being Dylan.
668
00:48:27,500 --> 00:48:29,590
A few weeks later, he calls me--
669
00:48:29,880 --> 00:48:32,050
guess where I'm at?
670
00:48:32,340 --> 00:48:33,680
Where?
671
00:48:33,970 --> 00:48:37,970
At a mansion in Malibu,
drinking a glass of wine
672
00:48:38,270 --> 00:48:40,520
and looking at the ocean.
673
00:48:40,810 --> 00:48:45,310
And he sends me a text
picture of a glass of wine,
674
00:48:45,610 --> 00:48:47,360
and there's the ocean.
675
00:48:47,650 --> 00:48:48,940
He's up on the hill in Malibu.
676
00:48:49,230 --> 00:48:50,690
Oh, my gosh.
677
00:48:50,990 --> 00:48:51,570
Hallelujah!
678
00:48:51,860 --> 00:48:52,490
What?
679
00:48:52,780 --> 00:48:53,860
What the heck.
680
00:48:54,160 --> 00:48:56,660
San Diego-- Panama City,
Florida, New York,
681
00:48:56,950 --> 00:48:58,160
and all kinds of places.
682
00:48:58,450 --> 00:49:02,250
Heck, he got on a
sailboat and was 80 miles
683
00:49:02,540 --> 00:49:04,000
off the shore in blue water.
684
00:49:04,290 --> 00:49:08,300
I'm thinking this kid is living
kind of a Forrest Gump, Walter
685
00:49:08,590 --> 00:49:12,170
Mitty kind of existence, and--
686
00:49:12,470 --> 00:49:19,060
and I started talking
to my friends about it.
687
00:49:19,350 --> 00:49:22,730
I'm proud of Dylan
in so many respects.
688
00:49:23,020 --> 00:49:23,640
You know?
689
00:49:23,940 --> 00:49:25,480
And so interested.
690
00:49:25,770 --> 00:49:29,690
But on the other side, what's
he going to do when he gets old?
691
00:49:34,240 --> 00:49:37,620
I think to myself, what
are you doing, kid?
692
00:49:37,910 --> 00:49:40,450
I'm confused, and
I don't understand,
693
00:49:40,740 --> 00:49:43,500
and I hope he's happy.
694
00:49:46,580 --> 00:49:50,670
I hope he is always up
for another adventure.
695
00:49:50,960 --> 00:49:53,760
But I hope he's a healthy guy.
696
00:49:54,050 --> 00:49:55,800
I hope he can find
the balance there--
697
00:49:59,100 --> 00:50:01,770
because I don't want
him to die before I do.
698
00:50:07,900 --> 00:50:09,360
Several months
699
00:50:09,650 --> 00:50:13,150
after my first trip to Utah,
John was getting remarried,
700
00:50:13,440 --> 00:50:15,110
and he invited me
to the wedding,
701
00:50:15,400 --> 00:50:17,320
especially since
Dylan would be there.
702
00:50:17,610 --> 00:50:21,080
It would be the first time any
of us had seen Dylan in years.
703
00:51:05,580 --> 00:51:07,250
First, I
would like to welcome
704
00:51:07,540 --> 00:51:11,000
everybody for coming out today.
705
00:51:11,290 --> 00:51:13,380
I could go on all
day talking about how
706
00:51:13,670 --> 00:51:14,760
wonderful my family is.
707
00:51:15,050 --> 00:51:15,840
I just love them.
708
00:51:16,130 --> 00:51:17,970
And my job makes
me grateful even
709
00:51:18,260 --> 00:51:20,220
more for my family every day.
710
00:51:20,510 --> 00:51:24,100
I'm going to focus a little bit
of attention on my children--
711
00:51:24,390 --> 00:51:25,470
Dylan here.
712
00:51:25,770 --> 00:51:26,850
Raise your hand, Dylan.
713
00:51:27,140 --> 00:51:29,600
He's my oldest son.
714
00:51:29,900 --> 00:51:32,020
Dylan is super-intelligent.
715
00:51:32,310 --> 00:51:34,860
He is like one of the
most awesome adventurers
716
00:51:35,150 --> 00:51:36,440
I've ever known--
717
00:51:36,740 --> 00:51:37,820
very resourceful.
718
00:51:38,110 --> 00:51:41,570
And one thing about
Dylan is he knows how
719
00:51:41,870 --> 00:51:44,990
to write and express himself.
720
00:51:45,290 --> 00:51:47,450
Like I read some of the
things that this kid wrote.
721
00:51:47,750 --> 00:51:49,710
And I just want him
to put it in a book.
722
00:51:50,000 --> 00:51:55,960
Kayla, she is the sweetest,
most kindest person in the world
723
00:51:56,260 --> 00:51:56,960
totally.
724
00:51:57,260 --> 00:51:59,760
I love you very much.
725
00:52:00,050 --> 00:52:03,050
Without further ado, I'll
have Ashton play a song,
726
00:52:03,350 --> 00:52:06,270
and in the middle of the
song is when we'll introduce
727
00:52:06,560 --> 00:52:08,310
my beautiful bride to you guys.
728
00:52:12,650 --> 00:52:14,860
By virtue of the legal
authority vested in me
729
00:52:15,150 --> 00:52:17,070
as an elder of the Church of
Jesus Christ of Latter-Day
730
00:52:17,360 --> 00:52:23,070
Saints, I pronounce you
John Corbon Olsen and Wendy
731
00:52:23,370 --> 00:52:30,460
Sue May husband and wife legally
and lawfully wedded for the--
732
00:52:30,750 --> 00:52:32,500
for the period of
your mortal lives.
733
00:52:32,790 --> 00:52:36,300
May god bless you in this joy,
your posterity, and a long life
734
00:52:36,590 --> 00:52:38,170
of happiness together.
735
00:52:38,460 --> 00:52:41,550
And may he enable you to keep
sacred covenants you've made.
736
00:52:41,840 --> 00:52:43,840
Mr. and Mrs. Olsen.
737
00:52:54,730 --> 00:52:55,480
Hello.
738
00:52:55,770 --> 00:52:57,820
I'm grandma.
739
00:52:58,110 --> 00:52:59,650
Yeah.
740
00:52:59,940 --> 00:53:02,740
I hear all about you--
how amazing you are.
741
00:53:03,030 --> 00:53:05,490
Well, I don't think
I'm that amazing.
742
00:53:05,780 --> 00:53:07,410
People are nice
though to say that.
743
00:53:07,700 --> 00:53:09,160
I hear you are.
744
00:53:09,450 --> 00:53:10,830
How long will you be here?
745
00:53:11,120 --> 00:53:14,290
I'll Probably be
here for a few months.
746
00:53:14,580 --> 00:53:15,380
That's good.
747
00:53:15,670 --> 00:53:16,290
Yeah.
748
00:53:16,590 --> 00:53:17,710
I'll be hanging around.
749
00:53:18,000 --> 00:53:19,880
It's good to be
around the family.
750
00:53:20,170 --> 00:53:23,220
I've been away for far too long.
751
00:53:23,510 --> 00:53:25,640
So being around the
family feels really nice.
752
00:53:25,930 --> 00:53:27,260
It's good.
753
00:53:27,550 --> 00:53:29,640
It's good.
754
00:53:29,930 --> 00:53:32,390
It's good you're going to stay.
755
00:53:32,680 --> 00:53:34,060
Mhm.
756
00:53:34,350 --> 00:53:37,650
Yeah, I'm excited to stay.
757
00:53:37,940 --> 00:53:42,650
There was this
boy whose parents made
758
00:53:42,950 --> 00:53:45,660
him come directly home
right after school,
759
00:53:45,950 --> 00:53:51,580
and when they went
to their church,
760
00:53:51,870 --> 00:53:57,380
they shook and lurched
all over the church floor.
761
00:54:01,960 --> 00:54:03,920
While Dylan was in Utah,
762
00:54:04,220 --> 00:54:07,550
he took me to some of
his memorable places.
763
00:54:07,840 --> 00:54:11,310
Ever since I was a
kid, I've always been so
764
00:54:11,600 --> 00:54:15,600
attracted to the ascetic life--
765
00:54:15,890 --> 00:54:20,610
the guy who lives out of a
backpack and just travels.
766
00:54:20,900 --> 00:54:24,150
This is a little place
we used to hang out.
767
00:54:24,440 --> 00:54:27,780
I ran away from home one
time and stayed here for--
768
00:54:28,070 --> 00:54:31,950
I don't know-- a
good couple of days.
769
00:54:32,240 --> 00:54:37,580
Utah-- this is a place
of geographical wonder--
770
00:54:37,870 --> 00:54:41,460
the high elevation
mountain lakes--
771
00:54:41,750 --> 00:54:44,510
the deserts-- the red rock--
772
00:54:44,800 --> 00:54:48,090
the mountains--
the marsh lands--
773
00:54:48,390 --> 00:54:50,220
the lakes-- everywhere.
774
00:54:50,510 --> 00:54:51,970
This is where I grew up.
775
00:54:52,260 --> 00:54:54,810
This is where I got to explore,
and learn how to be a woodsman,
776
00:54:55,100 --> 00:54:57,850
and learn how to learn
how to swim and fish
777
00:54:58,150 --> 00:55:00,230
and explore exploring itself.
778
00:55:03,280 --> 00:55:06,650
Sadly, this place is very
conservative and very
779
00:55:06,950 --> 00:55:09,910
judgmental,
predominantly populated
780
00:55:10,200 --> 00:55:14,410
by people who want to worship
their Lord and Savior Jesus.
781
00:55:18,870 --> 00:55:22,670
Somebody like me with
tattoos, an open mind, and--
782
00:55:22,960 --> 00:55:23,920
you get shunned out.
783
00:55:24,210 --> 00:55:24,960
You can't get a job.
784
00:55:25,260 --> 00:55:26,010
You're judged.
785
00:55:26,300 --> 00:55:28,550
You're scrutinized thoroughly.
786
00:55:28,840 --> 00:55:30,800
If you smoke cigarettes,
heaven forbid.
787
00:55:31,090 --> 00:55:33,100
If you drink a
beer, heaven forbid.
788
00:55:33,390 --> 00:55:35,560
I love to come here
to visit, but trying
789
00:55:35,850 --> 00:55:39,480
to become part of the inner
social structure of this state
790
00:55:39,770 --> 00:55:42,730
is a bit more of a
challenge than other places.
791
00:55:43,020 --> 00:55:46,440
A man from the past
living in the present.
792
00:55:46,740 --> 00:55:48,860
So his presence is
living in the future.
793
00:55:49,150 --> 00:55:52,990
He only sought the things
that the whole world forgot.
794
00:55:53,280 --> 00:55:53,870
I am he.
795
00:55:54,160 --> 00:55:55,330
He is me.
796
00:55:55,620 --> 00:55:59,660
If you only knew
he is another you.
797
00:55:59,960 --> 00:56:01,170
That night, Dylan
798
00:56:01,460 --> 00:56:03,880
asked me to show his
family the footage I filmed
799
00:56:04,170 --> 00:56:06,340
on the streets in Florida.
800
00:56:06,630 --> 00:56:09,010
Dylan was excited to see it.
801
00:56:09,300 --> 00:56:12,590
Oh I remember this dude.
802
00:56:12,890 --> 00:56:13,850
This cat was weird.
803
00:56:14,140 --> 00:56:15,350
I forgot about him.
804
00:56:15,640 --> 00:56:18,140
That was the bagel
store right there.
805
00:56:18,430 --> 00:56:20,440
I love this man.
806
00:56:20,730 --> 00:56:21,690
Good dude.
807
00:56:21,980 --> 00:56:23,190
But gradually I
808
00:56:23,480 --> 00:56:25,440
noticed that not everyone
was comfortable seeing
809
00:56:25,730 --> 00:56:27,440
Dylan as a homeless person.
810
00:56:27,730 --> 00:56:28,360
Ahh, shit.
811
00:56:31,610 --> 00:56:32,780
Ahh!
812
00:56:33,070 --> 00:56:35,530
He's so awesome!
813
00:56:35,830 --> 00:56:36,910
Oh, fucking asshole.
814
00:56:47,630 --> 00:56:48,840
Son of a bitch.
815
00:57:01,020 --> 00:57:02,600
After the screening,
816
00:57:02,890 --> 00:57:06,190
Ashton told Dylan not to
curse in front of him,
817
00:57:06,480 --> 00:57:08,320
which made Dylan very upset.
818
00:57:20,290 --> 00:57:21,120
You're a pain in the ass.
819
00:57:21,410 --> 00:57:22,580
You realize that?
820
00:57:39,600 --> 00:57:44,060
I just wish that he could
see my side of the world
821
00:57:44,350 --> 00:57:45,190
a little bit better.
822
00:57:46,690 --> 00:57:48,060
If one day he wakes
up and he is like,
823
00:57:48,360 --> 00:57:51,650
wow, the Mormon religion
is fucking bullshit
824
00:57:51,940 --> 00:57:55,610
and my entire fucking
life philosophy is gone.
825
00:57:55,910 --> 00:57:57,700
Just like what happened
to me-- if one day he
826
00:57:57,990 --> 00:58:01,830
realizes that's gone,
what the fuck would he do?
827
00:58:13,920 --> 00:58:15,680
Instead
of sleeping in his parents'
828
00:58:15,970 --> 00:58:18,800
house, Dylan went to do
drugs with his friends
829
00:58:19,100 --> 00:58:19,930
on the mountain.
830
00:58:40,580 --> 00:58:43,580
Dylan left Utah soon
after the wedding.
831
00:58:43,870 --> 00:58:46,750
It was then I remembered
something that John told
832
00:58:47,040 --> 00:58:50,090
me the first time I met him.
833
00:58:50,380 --> 00:58:52,000
He had had
some psychological problems
834
00:58:52,300 --> 00:58:54,380
that we tried to deal with.
835
00:58:54,670 --> 00:58:56,260
He gets his medications.
836
00:58:56,550 --> 00:58:59,090
Then he'll go out
and sell it for $300.
837
00:58:59,390 --> 00:59:00,220
I ignored
838
00:59:00,510 --> 00:59:02,100
what he told me back then.
839
00:59:02,390 --> 00:59:04,470
I dismissed it as
an overreaction
840
00:59:04,770 --> 00:59:07,390
to Dylan's non-conformity.
841
00:59:07,690 --> 00:59:10,900
But I realized my own
bias kept me from hearing
842
00:59:11,190 --> 00:59:12,980
what John tried to tell me.
843
00:59:13,280 --> 00:59:18,990
Part of his mental
issues was severe paranoia.
844
00:59:19,280 --> 00:59:21,580
He starts to tell me that
there's people after him.
845
00:59:21,870 --> 00:59:23,200
And he starts naming names.
846
00:59:23,490 --> 00:59:24,790
And I know these.
847
00:59:25,080 --> 00:59:30,580
I knew one of the people was
here and couldn't possibly
848
00:59:30,880 --> 00:59:33,210
have even known where he was.
849
00:59:33,500 --> 00:59:37,800
So I tried to
convince him that he
850
00:59:38,090 --> 00:59:40,930
was just having hallucinations.
851
00:59:41,220 --> 00:59:43,890
How did you know
it wasn't from the drug use?
852
00:59:44,180 --> 00:59:47,730
Because I've known
a lot of drug addicts
853
00:59:48,020 --> 00:59:53,110
in the course of my career and
people who were blitzed on you
854
00:59:53,400 --> 00:59:56,110
name it.
855
00:59:56,400 --> 01:00:01,070
And that's not a typical
reaction to the drugs.
856
01:00:01,360 --> 01:00:05,620
I know that the drugs
compounded the issue.
857
01:00:05,910 --> 01:00:08,200
I wonder
when Dylan first
858
01:00:08,500 --> 01:00:11,460
had that kind of experience and
then whether he had told you.
859
01:00:14,840 --> 01:00:16,800
It really didn't
come on strong
860
01:00:17,090 --> 01:00:19,760
until he was 17, 18 years old.
861
01:00:22,590 --> 01:00:28,520
He's always been open and
honest with me about bad things
862
01:00:28,810 --> 01:00:29,680
going on in his life.
863
01:00:33,360 --> 01:00:38,530
But I can't guarantee that he
wasn't hiding something that
864
01:00:38,820 --> 01:00:40,400
was bothering him
or that he would
865
01:00:40,700 --> 01:00:45,450
even know that this isn't real
and this isn't the way it is.
866
01:00:45,740 --> 01:00:48,450
I mean, he could have been
experiencing things to this day
867
01:00:48,750 --> 01:00:52,960
that he thinks were real
that didn't actually happen.
868
01:01:18,020 --> 01:01:19,280
Every time
I close my eyes,
869
01:01:19,570 --> 01:01:22,110
I'm mesmerized by
some kind of dream.
870
01:01:38,040 --> 01:01:39,920
Places I've never
seen before, but I
871
01:01:40,210 --> 01:01:41,210
feel like I've seen before.
872
01:01:45,010 --> 01:01:47,970
The first time that I
heard them so vividly,
873
01:01:48,260 --> 01:01:50,560
I just thought I was possessed.
874
01:01:55,650 --> 01:01:57,310
I'd look at somebody,
and I swear,
875
01:01:57,610 --> 01:01:59,570
I could hear what
they were thinking.
876
01:01:59,860 --> 01:02:01,230
And then I'd look
at somebody else,
877
01:02:01,530 --> 01:02:02,610
and I would hear what
they were thinking.
878
01:02:08,120 --> 01:02:09,990
And I was just afraid.
879
01:02:14,830 --> 01:02:16,960
I don't even remember
what happened after that.
880
01:02:17,250 --> 01:02:18,540
I don't even know how I got.
881
01:02:22,010 --> 01:02:24,470
Yeah, I really can't even
remember what happened.
882
01:02:24,760 --> 01:02:25,720
I went blank for like a week.
883
01:02:42,070 --> 01:02:43,530
I could put it on the inside
so it would be hidden.
884
01:02:43,820 --> 01:02:45,400
- Which?
- See how it's got this--
885
01:02:45,700 --> 01:02:46,280
Where?
886
01:02:46,570 --> 01:02:47,570
Oh, cool.
887
01:02:47,860 --> 01:02:50,240
All right, go in
the shade somewhere?
888
01:02:50,530 --> 01:02:53,120
Mhm.
889
01:02:53,410 --> 01:02:56,210
Here is the thing
that I kept wondering
890
01:02:56,500 --> 01:02:58,370
and I couldn't
understand, because we
891
01:02:58,670 --> 01:03:00,420
spent almost a month together.
892
01:03:00,710 --> 01:03:05,380
And I did not notice
anything, whether you behaved
893
01:03:05,670 --> 01:03:07,510
differently, whether
you were nervous,
894
01:03:07,800 --> 01:03:11,100
or panicked, or anything--
was it just that time period--
895
01:03:11,390 --> 01:03:12,390
just nothing happened?
896
01:03:12,680 --> 01:03:13,350
You didn't hear voices.
897
01:03:13,640 --> 01:03:14,390
You didn't see illusions?
898
01:03:14,680 --> 01:03:15,980
No, I just didn't let it show.
899
01:03:16,270 --> 01:03:17,020
Really?
900
01:03:17,310 --> 01:03:18,600
Yeah, I just hide a lot of it.
901
01:03:18,900 --> 01:03:21,690
How could you
hide it if that's so strong?
902
01:03:21,980 --> 01:03:23,980
Alcohol.
903
01:03:24,280 --> 01:03:25,400
Really?
904
01:03:25,690 --> 01:03:27,030
Alcohol helps.
905
01:03:27,320 --> 01:03:30,660
But I mean, for instance,
there was that one time we
906
01:03:30,950 --> 01:03:34,330
were eating the
dinner in South Beach,
907
01:03:34,620 --> 01:03:37,660
sitting next to that family.
908
01:03:37,960 --> 01:03:40,750
And some guy gave me a weird
look-- some like gang banger
909
01:03:41,040 --> 01:03:41,750
looking guy.
910
01:03:42,040 --> 01:03:43,340
He looked at me-- what's up?
911
01:03:43,630 --> 01:03:47,170
And it just-- immediately,
I got this panic going on.
912
01:03:47,470 --> 01:03:48,340
I remember the
first thing I did is
913
01:03:48,630 --> 01:03:50,300
I went and bought some alcohol.
914
01:03:50,590 --> 01:03:52,010
And I got-- we got on that bus.
915
01:03:52,300 --> 01:03:53,890
We were drinking the vodka,
and I was all happy on the bus
916
01:03:54,180 --> 01:03:54,810
after that.
917
01:03:58,850 --> 01:04:01,190
I had been with
Dylan that whole night filming
918
01:04:01,480 --> 01:04:04,230
everything, but I missed this--
919
01:04:04,520 --> 01:04:09,950
this entire narrative that
was running in his head.
920
01:04:10,240 --> 01:04:12,280
I went back to
look at my footage
921
01:04:12,570 --> 01:04:16,790
and finally noticed how much
Dylan had been drinking.
922
01:04:17,080 --> 01:04:17,660
It was constant.
923
01:04:26,250 --> 01:04:27,550
Are you drunk?
924
01:04:27,840 --> 01:04:29,970
He told me that the voices
had always been there.
925
01:04:30,260 --> 01:04:31,720
It's a sensation
that I'm going
926
01:04:32,010 --> 01:04:33,680
to deal with my whole
life, and I'm just--
927
01:04:33,970 --> 01:04:36,720
I'm basically in the, I don't
know, kindergarten stage
928
01:04:37,020 --> 01:04:38,980
of trying to understand these--
929
01:04:39,270 --> 01:04:42,810
this phenomenon going on in
my psyche, in my spirituality.
930
01:04:47,860 --> 01:04:49,940
I'm
trying to understand.
931
01:04:50,240 --> 01:04:52,950
It's-- it's--
yeah, you can't--
932
01:04:53,240 --> 01:04:55,830
it's something really
difficult to explain,
933
01:04:56,120 --> 01:04:58,750
and that's why there's such
little compassion towards it.
934
01:05:01,830 --> 01:05:03,790
- I
- asked Dylan if he remembered
935
01:05:04,080 --> 01:05:05,630
any of the voices he heard.
936
01:05:05,920 --> 01:05:07,960
He said he had
written them down.
937
01:05:08,250 --> 01:05:09,340
And these are
true things that I've
938
01:05:09,630 --> 01:05:11,550
actually heard in the past.
939
01:05:11,840 --> 01:05:13,340
"Look at him.
He's so foolish.
940
01:05:13,640 --> 01:05:15,010
Watch how he's doing it.
941
01:05:15,300 --> 01:05:16,640
Yep, he hears us.
That idiot.
942
01:05:16,930 --> 01:05:18,430
You're always going to be
someone's bitch, Dylan.
943
01:05:18,720 --> 01:05:21,270
This is Project Craft Unit 278.
944
01:05:21,560 --> 01:05:22,890
Your grandpa is dying right now.
945
01:05:23,190 --> 01:05:25,190
Listen to him suffering in
the hospital and the old man
946
01:05:25,480 --> 01:05:26,810
moaning sound and groaning.
947
01:05:27,110 --> 01:05:31,400
He has lasted longer than
most San Diego."
948
01:05:53,420 --> 01:05:55,510
When I
was a child in China,
949
01:05:55,800 --> 01:05:58,140
people in my village used
to say that mental illness
950
01:05:58,430 --> 01:06:00,970
was contagious.
951
01:06:01,270 --> 01:06:04,480
When I grew up, the media
said that people who protested
952
01:06:04,770 --> 01:06:07,560
against the government
had mental illness,
953
01:06:07,860 --> 01:06:09,150
and I had seen how
dissidents were
954
01:06:09,440 --> 01:06:10,780
locked in mental hospitals.
955
01:06:15,110 --> 01:06:18,370
When John first told me
that Dylan was mentally ill,
956
01:06:18,660 --> 01:06:20,450
I was in denial.
957
01:06:20,740 --> 01:06:24,500
But now hearing Dylan
describing his mental trauma,
958
01:06:24,790 --> 01:06:26,920
I started to question my
own perception of reality.
959
01:06:31,750 --> 01:06:34,760
How do you know what
things in your life
960
01:06:35,050 --> 01:06:38,430
are real and are not real?
961
01:06:38,720 --> 01:06:40,350
I can just feel it.
962
01:06:40,640 --> 01:06:42,720
I have physical
sensations in my body,
963
01:06:43,020 --> 01:06:46,390
and I've had enough
experiences where I know it's
964
01:06:46,690 --> 01:06:52,530
not real and thought it was.
965
01:06:52,820 --> 01:06:54,070
I know when it's not real.
966
01:06:54,360 --> 01:06:54,940
No.
967
01:06:55,240 --> 01:06:56,700
I can feel it.
968
01:08:30,870 --> 01:08:32,580
Have you caught anything?
969
01:08:32,880 --> 01:08:33,500
No.
970
01:08:35,290 --> 01:08:36,550
I brought you some fish.
971
01:08:36,840 --> 01:08:37,550
Are you serious?
972
01:08:51,810 --> 01:08:53,190
My relationship
with Dylan
973
01:08:53,480 --> 01:08:57,860
is like boyfriend-girlfriend,
I would say.
974
01:08:58,150 --> 01:09:00,610
He finds so much
beauty on the street.
975
01:09:00,900 --> 01:09:02,990
It's so special that I get
to see through his eyes
976
01:09:03,280 --> 01:09:05,950
directly how it is.
977
01:09:06,240 --> 01:09:09,410
So we love each other a lot.
978
01:09:09,700 --> 01:09:12,790
But we live a lifestyle
that constantly changes,
979
01:09:13,080 --> 01:09:15,540
or we like when it changes.
980
01:09:15,840 --> 01:09:16,790
And we love loving people.
981
01:09:21,880 --> 01:09:25,260
After experiencing this, I feel
like I won't be able to like
982
01:09:25,550 --> 01:09:28,720
live a normal life ever again.
983
01:09:33,810 --> 01:09:36,610
I don't see Dylan
as mentally ill.
984
01:09:36,900 --> 01:09:39,940
We think very imaginatively.
985
01:09:40,230 --> 01:09:42,780
I think that's why
we get along so well.
986
01:09:43,070 --> 01:09:45,620
Maybe he's mentally ill
because he doesn't want
987
01:09:45,910 --> 01:09:48,280
to be part of the status quo.
988
01:09:48,580 --> 01:09:49,700
But that's not mentally ill.
989
01:09:49,990 --> 01:09:53,660
It's just a different opinion.
990
01:10:31,490 --> 01:10:33,290
Over the next few days,
991
01:10:33,580 --> 01:10:36,000
I met some of Dylan's
homeless friends.
992
01:10:36,290 --> 01:10:37,080
What's going on, bro?
993
01:10:37,380 --> 01:10:38,830
How you doing, my man?
994
01:10:39,130 --> 01:10:41,920
Many of
them shared Dylan's experience.
995
01:10:42,210 --> 01:10:46,050
How long have you been living
this kind of lifestyle?
996
01:10:46,340 --> 01:10:48,840
On and off for a lot of years.
997
01:10:51,850 --> 01:10:52,600
I have OCD.
998
01:10:52,890 --> 01:10:53,850
It makes it difficult to--
999
01:10:54,140 --> 01:10:56,310
I mean, I can do
education, but as far
1000
01:10:56,600 --> 01:10:59,900
as balancing the things of
the workforce and life place--
1001
01:11:00,190 --> 01:11:02,860
I am incapable of doing that.
1002
01:11:03,150 --> 01:11:04,940
So this the last all I can do.
1003
01:11:05,240 --> 01:11:07,740
I had some
experiences with voices.
1004
01:11:08,030 --> 01:11:09,320
I had little tricksters.
1005
01:11:09,620 --> 01:11:10,950
They would either
laugh at me, tell me
1006
01:11:11,240 --> 01:11:13,200
good things, bad things, and
then there was tricksters.
1007
01:11:13,490 --> 01:11:15,120
And you'd hear them
giggling, and I'd
1008
01:11:15,410 --> 01:11:16,790
be like taking a shower.
1009
01:11:17,080 --> 01:11:19,630
Shut off the water and you
know, and save water, you know?
1010
01:11:19,920 --> 01:11:21,540
I'm like, oh.
1011
01:11:21,840 --> 01:11:23,340
And then they're
like, look how stupid she is?
1012
01:11:23,630 --> 01:11:24,710
She just turned off the water.
- I know.
1013
01:11:25,010 --> 01:11:25,920
Right.
1014
01:11:26,220 --> 01:11:27,590
It goes on, and
on, and on, and on.
1015
01:11:27,880 --> 01:11:30,340
Then finally, you put
yourself in a corner,
1016
01:11:30,640 --> 01:11:32,470
and cover your head,
and start crying--
1017
01:11:32,760 --> 01:11:35,270
bawling your eyes out like
what did I do wrong this time?
1018
01:11:35,560 --> 01:11:40,310
My confidence, you know,
like it went to crap.
1019
01:11:40,600 --> 01:11:42,980
If you tell any
doctor that you hear things
1020
01:11:43,270 --> 01:11:45,820
and see things that other
people can't, then that's
1021
01:11:46,110 --> 01:11:47,070
schizo affective.
1022
01:11:47,360 --> 01:11:48,700
That's just what
they're going to say.
1023
01:11:48,990 --> 01:11:52,120
So some people are very
afraid of that word.
1024
01:11:52,410 --> 01:11:54,910
I don't even like to use
that word schizophrenia just
1025
01:11:55,200 --> 01:11:57,120
for that reason.
1026
01:11:57,410 --> 01:11:59,290
I'm sensitive to other
energies and forces
1027
01:11:59,580 --> 01:12:01,540
in this world that are real.
1028
01:12:01,830 --> 01:12:03,460
I'm not mentally ill.
1029
01:12:03,750 --> 01:12:07,340
I'm really just experiencing
stuff that's in the ether
1030
01:12:07,630 --> 01:12:08,590
that most people can't see.
1031
01:12:14,010 --> 01:12:15,350
It was difficult for me
1032
01:12:15,640 --> 01:12:18,480
to imagine their states of mind.
1033
01:12:18,770 --> 01:12:21,440
I wanted to understand
Dylan's mind better.
1034
01:12:21,730 --> 01:12:24,070
So I asked him if
he could visualize
1035
01:12:24,360 --> 01:12:27,030
some of his experiences for me.
1036
01:12:27,320 --> 01:12:29,820
Dylan came up with the
idea to recreate moments
1037
01:12:30,110 --> 01:12:32,410
of mental trauma from his past.
1038
01:12:32,700 --> 01:12:37,160
He invited his homeless friends
to create the re-enactments.
1039
01:12:43,880 --> 01:12:47,760
So if everyone can
just find a random book,
1040
01:12:48,050 --> 01:12:51,720
take a book, and, uh,
just use your intuition.
1041
01:12:52,010 --> 01:12:54,050
Somebody will sit there
chair close to me,
1042
01:12:54,350 --> 01:12:58,180
and they'll just start reading
aloud just, you know, quietly.
1043
01:12:58,470 --> 01:13:00,480
And I get confused
and distracted.
1044
01:13:00,770 --> 01:13:05,190
And then it will just go
around in a circle like that.
1045
01:13:05,480 --> 01:13:06,440
We've got
one question, man.
1046
01:13:06,730 --> 01:13:07,610
Yeah?
1047
01:13:07,900 --> 01:13:10,280
What is the
name of the movie?
1048
01:13:10,570 --> 01:13:11,610
"I'm Another You."
1049
01:13:11,900 --> 01:13:13,610
"I'm Another You."
1050
01:13:13,910 --> 01:13:15,070
Yeah.
1051
01:13:15,370 --> 01:13:16,780
That described
schizophrenia pretty well.
1052
01:13:17,080 --> 01:13:20,000
Yeah, well, I mean, you know,
I'm grateful that all of you
1053
01:13:20,290 --> 01:13:22,960
are here for this,
because you know,
1054
01:13:23,250 --> 01:13:26,040
I hate to use the word
schizophrenic, or bipolar,
1055
01:13:26,340 --> 01:13:28,550
or anything like that,
because we're really
1056
01:13:28,840 --> 01:13:32,170
just empathic, sensitive
people that don't
1057
01:13:32,470 --> 01:13:34,840
fit into this whole machine.
1058
01:13:35,140 --> 01:13:38,060
We're really-- we're
really emotional.
1059
01:13:38,350 --> 01:13:40,640
And we see things
other people can't see.
1060
01:13:40,930 --> 01:13:42,020
And it's important.
1061
01:13:42,310 --> 01:13:44,770
So I'm glad you guys are here.
1062
01:13:45,060 --> 01:13:45,730
Right on, brother.
1063
01:14:05,500 --> 01:14:07,840
"The homeless are
close to the streets,
1064
01:14:08,130 --> 01:14:11,960
to the pavement, curbs, and
the gutters, the concrete,
1065
01:14:12,260 --> 01:14:16,050
the litter, the sewer, the
sewer lids, the fire hydrants,
1066
01:14:16,340 --> 01:14:21,100
and wastebaskets, and bus stops,
and the store fronts and move
1067
01:14:21,390 --> 01:14:25,350
slowly over familiar
terrain, day after day,
1068
01:14:25,640 --> 01:14:30,230
stopping to talk to each other,
because time means little.
1069
01:14:30,520 --> 01:14:33,530
Stopping to watch a stalled
car under hats and caps.
1070
01:14:33,820 --> 01:14:35,990
A new drug deal behind
drugstore sunshades,
1071
01:14:36,280 --> 01:14:39,490
a strange face-- like
sentries, they observe."
1072
01:14:39,780 --> 01:14:41,790
"The sexual
images."."
1073
01:15:09,770 --> 01:15:10,860
"Look at that.
1074
01:15:11,150 --> 01:15:13,400
They had him hogtied,
raped him, and then
1075
01:15:13,690 --> 01:15:14,780
put a knife to his chest."
1076
01:15:38,010 --> 01:15:39,890
I'm
openly expressing the most
1077
01:15:40,180 --> 01:15:43,720
sensitive things about me.
1078
01:15:44,010 --> 01:15:47,100
If some people understood
me, which I know they would,
1079
01:15:47,390 --> 01:15:49,060
I would appreciate that.
1080
01:15:49,350 --> 01:15:51,060
This isn't about me.
1081
01:15:51,360 --> 01:15:54,650
Most people with these kind
of-- with a mind like mine,
1082
01:15:54,940 --> 01:15:58,990
they don't have skills
to explain or illustrate
1083
01:15:59,280 --> 01:16:00,910
what's going on actually.
1084
01:16:01,200 --> 01:16:04,540
You asked me if I was
homeless by choice.
1085
01:16:04,830 --> 01:16:12,080
And I would have said
yes initially but--
1086
01:16:12,380 --> 01:16:15,050
because I did make the
choice to be homeless.
1087
01:16:15,340 --> 01:16:17,840
But thinking about
it on a deeper level,
1088
01:16:18,130 --> 01:16:20,300
it is definitely not a choice.
1089
01:16:20,590 --> 01:16:23,100
How am I supposed
to keep a job when
1090
01:16:23,390 --> 01:16:28,020
I have these social paranoias
and these hallucinations?
1091
01:16:28,310 --> 01:16:33,110
How can I call in sick
maybe once or twice a week?
1092
01:16:33,400 --> 01:16:36,570
It's-- it's really not feasible.
1093
01:16:36,860 --> 01:16:38,900
By their standards,
I'm mentally disabled.
1094
01:16:57,630 --> 01:16:59,340
I came
to Florida to find
1095
01:16:59,630 --> 01:17:03,300
out whether Dylan was mentally
ill and what his reality was.
1096
01:17:06,680 --> 01:17:08,810
But after understanding
the complexities
1097
01:17:09,100 --> 01:17:13,020
of his mental health,
addiction, and homelessness,
1098
01:17:13,310 --> 01:17:17,150
the question had
become less important.
1099
01:17:17,440 --> 01:17:19,110
How do you spell your name?
1100
01:17:22,200 --> 01:17:23,610
Dylan.
1101
01:17:23,910 --> 01:17:26,450
I had seen how the mind can
build prisons for itself.
1102
01:17:30,410 --> 01:17:32,870
I had seen, through
people's treatment of Dylan,
1103
01:17:33,170 --> 01:17:35,460
how they were limited
by their perception.
1104
01:17:35,750 --> 01:17:38,300
You see, you and I, like we
don't differ all that much.
1105
01:17:38,590 --> 01:17:39,250
Yeah.
1106
01:17:39,550 --> 01:17:40,630
I'm just fascinated.
1107
01:17:40,920 --> 01:17:42,380
So what made you like--
did someone else do
1108
01:17:42,680 --> 01:17:44,720
this that you decided to do it?
1109
01:17:45,010 --> 01:17:46,510
I like him, you know?
1110
01:17:46,800 --> 01:17:48,640
He's a funny cat, man,
you know, he's young.
1111
01:17:48,930 --> 01:17:51,850
He's finding himself.
1112
01:17:52,140 --> 01:17:56,860
I see Dylan's face in every
homeless person that I see.
1113
01:18:11,040 --> 01:18:17,500
I came to the US in 2011.
1114
01:18:17,790 --> 01:18:20,460
I followed Dylan hoping
to find something I've
1115
01:18:20,750 --> 01:18:22,260
been searching for all my life.
1116
01:18:26,260 --> 01:18:29,430
Along the way I've learned
what I've been searching
1117
01:18:29,720 --> 01:18:33,060
for exists only in the mind.
1118
01:18:40,190 --> 01:18:42,610
"What
else is there besides this?
1119
01:18:42,900 --> 01:18:46,700
Endless kisses from
Mrs. Bliss herself,
1120
01:18:46,990 --> 01:18:50,700
escaping the clasp of the
second-hand's ticking task,
1121
01:18:50,990 --> 01:18:54,410
kicking back the flask
to bask with no mask.
1122
01:18:54,710 --> 01:18:57,960
Wherever he goes, he
leaves an echo to show.
1123
01:18:58,250 --> 01:19:01,340
From the pitter patter of his
feet to the magic incantation
1124
01:19:01,630 --> 01:19:06,380
he speaks, a man from the
past living in the present.
1125
01:19:06,680 --> 01:19:09,640
So his presence is
living in the future.
1126
01:19:09,930 --> 01:19:14,640
Yesterday and tomorrow, last
week was seven years long.
1127
01:19:14,930 --> 01:19:18,810
The only thought in his mind
was the singing bird's song.
1128
01:19:19,100 --> 01:19:22,860
He only sought the things
that the whole world forgot.
1129
01:19:23,150 --> 01:19:24,070
I am he.
1130
01:19:24,360 --> 01:19:25,650
He is me.
1131
01:19:25,940 --> 01:19:27,860
If you only knew,
he is another you."
84053
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