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1
00:00:15,098 --> 00:00:17,100
[ Sighs ]
2
00:00:24,624 --> 00:00:27,077
Well--
3
00:00:28,995 --> 00:00:30,880
Redecorating?
4
00:00:32,682 --> 00:00:35,068
Still upset
about Strife, huh?
5
00:00:35,068 --> 00:00:37,053
[ Grunts ]
6
00:00:37,053 --> 00:00:39,939
He was a geek
with the I.Qof a sponge.
7
00:00:39,939 --> 00:00:42,559
Take my word for it.
He's better off dead.
8
00:00:42,559 --> 00:00:45,945
Still, he was fun
to kick around.
9
00:00:45,945 --> 00:00:49,249
I think
I may have found a way
to cheer you up.
10
00:00:49,249 --> 00:00:52,185
Oh, let me guess.
11
00:00:52,185 --> 00:00:56,189
You hatched a plan
to rid the world
of my overrated half-brother.
12
00:00:56,189 --> 00:00:58,191
So what else is new?
13
00:00:58,191 --> 00:01:00,193
All right,
enough's enough.
14
00:01:04,380 --> 00:01:07,867
Snap out of it.
You're starting to become
a real drag.
15
00:01:07,867 --> 00:01:11,137
Why, Discord, I'd forgotten
what a temper you have.
16
00:01:11,137 --> 00:01:14,974
I know we haven't been
the best offriendslately,
17
00:01:14,974 --> 00:01:17,977
so why don't you
let me make it up to you?
18
00:01:17,977 --> 00:01:20,480
Oh. What did you
have in mind?
19
00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:22,465
Why spoil the fun?
20
00:01:22,465 --> 00:01:25,468
Let me just say that
by the end of the day,
21
00:01:25,468 --> 00:01:27,971
you'll be so tickled...
22
00:01:27,971 --> 00:01:30,440
you'll want me to be
your second-in-command.
23
00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:33,409
Strife's body's
not even cold yet.
24
00:01:33,409 --> 00:01:35,378
You have no shame!
25
00:01:36,379 --> 00:01:38,832
And Ilikeyour style.
26
00:01:38,832 --> 00:01:43,336
Baby, there's a whole lot
more of me to like,
if you know where to look.
27
00:01:44,838 --> 00:01:47,841
Oh, you know I do.
28
00:01:48,808 --> 00:01:52,128
Go. Impress me.
29
00:01:56,983 --> 00:01:58,885
So the bear sits down.
30
00:01:58,885 --> 00:02:02,889
The tavern keeper says,
"We don't get
too many bears in here."
31
00:02:02,889 --> 00:02:06,893
And the bear says,
"Well, at these prices
I'm not surprised!"
32
00:02:06,893 --> 00:02:08,895
[ Laughing ]
33
00:02:13,399 --> 00:02:16,402
Okay, I guess that one
was kinda funny.
34
00:02:16,402 --> 00:02:18,404
You know, um,
35
00:02:18,404 --> 00:02:22,408
usually when people
say something's funny,
they, like, laugh.
36
00:02:22,408 --> 00:02:24,410
I'm sorry.
37
00:02:24,410 --> 00:02:27,914
Well, at least
Jason'll find it a hoot.
He's got a sense of humor.
38
00:02:27,914 --> 00:02:30,917
I've got a sense of humor.
I just exercise it wisely.
39
00:02:30,917 --> 00:02:32,919
[ Sarcastic Chuckle ]
40
00:02:32,919 --> 00:02:35,922
I can't believe Jason
and Alcmene are celebrating
their second anniversary.
41
00:02:35,922 --> 00:02:37,924
Boy, time flies.
42
00:02:37,924 --> 00:02:39,926
That's not
the only thing.
Huh?
43
00:02:39,926 --> 00:02:44,330
Whoo-hoo!
Whoa-ho-ho-ho!
Whoo!
44
00:02:44,831 --> 00:02:46,583
What's up, Herc?
45
00:02:46,583 --> 00:02:48,418
You are.
46
00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:51,354
Oh, Iolaus, meet Hermes,
the Messenger of the Gods.
47
00:02:51,354 --> 00:02:53,990
- Hi.
- Right!
48
00:02:53,990 --> 00:02:56,993
You guys are
my last gig of the day.
It's a good thing too.
49
00:02:56,993 --> 00:02:58,878
My feet are killing me.
50
00:02:58,878 --> 00:03:01,214
Well, so, do you have
a message for me?
51
00:03:01,214 --> 00:03:04,150
Of course I got
a message for ya.
52
00:03:04,150 --> 00:03:09,155
Uh, it says here someone
swiped Artemis's bow
from her temple.
53
00:03:09,155 --> 00:03:12,008
She's all tied up at Olympus
and wants you to help her out.
54
00:03:12,008 --> 00:03:16,362
- Somebody stole Artemis's bow?
- What did I just say?
Didn't I just say that?
55
00:03:16,362 --> 00:03:19,148
Well, Hercules,
looks like we're gonna be late
arriving at your mother's.
56
00:03:19,649 --> 00:03:21,150
Well, shouldn't
take too long.
57
00:03:21,651 --> 00:03:24,153
I think I have
a pretty good idea
who we're looking for.
58
00:03:24,654 --> 00:03:27,156
Autolycus. Last time
I saw that two-bit hustler,
he almost got me killed.
59
00:03:27,657 --> 00:03:29,909
I'm sure he'll be glad
to see you too.
60
00:03:29,909 --> 00:03:34,697
I gotta bail. I'm cruising
over to the Palladium later,
check out the mud wrestling.
61
00:03:34,697 --> 00:03:37,584
Gets real dirty,
if you know what I mean.
Later, dudes.
62
00:03:37,584 --> 00:03:40,086
Whoo-hoo!
63
00:03:40,086 --> 00:03:41,905
Let me guess.
64
00:03:42,405 --> 00:03:44,908
He and Aphrodite are,
like, real tight, man.
65
00:03:45,408 --> 00:03:48,328
Well, like, uh,
totally, dude.
[ Laughing ]
66
00:03:52,265 --> 00:03:54,267
Two for you.
67
00:03:55,268 --> 00:03:57,270
For you.
68
00:03:57,270 --> 00:03:59,272
That's the last of it.
69
00:03:59,272 --> 00:04:02,275
You three,
take the king's gold
to his vault.
70
00:04:04,277 --> 00:04:06,279
You. Stand guard.
71
00:04:06,279 --> 00:04:09,282
Yes, sir,
you can count on me...
72
00:04:12,285 --> 00:04:15,288
to take
as much as I can carry
while you're gone.
73
00:04:20,293 --> 00:04:22,295
[ Chuckling ]
74
00:04:24,797 --> 00:04:26,733
[ Laughs ]
75
00:04:26,733 --> 00:04:29,836
[ Gasps ]
Hercules.
76
00:04:29,836 --> 00:04:31,804
And...
whatever your name is.
77
00:04:31,804 --> 00:04:35,191
- What a pleasant surprise.
- Wish I could say the same,
Autolycus.
78
00:04:35,191 --> 00:04:38,177
Isn't stealing the king's gold
a little beneath you?
79
00:04:38,177 --> 00:04:40,163
How good of you to notice.
80
00:04:40,163 --> 00:04:42,665
You see, I figure
every so often a fella just
has to go back to basics.
81
00:04:43,166 --> 00:04:46,536
Besides, the king, he's rich.
What about the needs
of the people?
82
00:04:46,536 --> 00:04:48,972
Oh, come on!
You don't care
about the people.
83
00:04:48,972 --> 00:04:51,924
Of course I do.
I happen to be one of them.
84
00:04:52,425 --> 00:04:55,395
Well, as much as I've enjoyed
this little reunion,
I haven't enjoyed it that much.
85
00:04:55,395 --> 00:04:57,263
Good day.
86
00:04:59,265 --> 00:05:01,334
[ Whimpering ]
87
00:05:01,334 --> 00:05:05,238
Where's Artemis's bow?
Ah, my fame
spreads like wildfire.
88
00:05:05,238 --> 00:05:08,641
- No, like a bad rash.
- Fellas, admit it--
you're impressed.
89
00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:11,611
How many mortals
can steal from a god
and get away with it?
90
00:05:11,611 --> 00:05:15,598
You didn't get away with it.
We're here to take it back.
Oh. Right.
91
00:05:15,598 --> 00:05:18,601
Well, I'd love
to help you out,
I really would,
92
00:05:18,601 --> 00:05:20,987
but the problem is, uh,
I sold it.
93
00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:24,190
[ Groans ]
94
00:05:24,190 --> 00:05:26,442
You sold it?
To whom?
95
00:05:26,442 --> 00:05:30,680
Now, if I told you I would be
violating the sanctity of
the thief/client relationship.
96
00:05:30,680 --> 00:05:33,733
[ Hercules ] You're not
gonna fast-talk your way
out of this one.
97
00:05:33,733 --> 00:05:35,735
[ Autolycus ]
Oh, all right.
I'll tell you.
98
00:05:36,652 --> 00:05:41,090
[ Groans ]
Oh, that hurts. Oww.
99
00:05:41,090 --> 00:05:44,260
[ Groaning Continues ]
100
00:05:48,765 --> 00:05:50,767
[ Yelling ]
101
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:53,052
[ Squealing ]
102
00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:56,689
[ Giggles ]
The other white meat.
103
00:05:58,057 --> 00:06:00,259
[ Pig Snorting ]
104
00:06:02,261 --> 00:06:04,130
[ Together ]
Hercules?
105
00:06:04,130 --> 00:06:06,933
[ Squeals, Snorts ]
106
00:06:08,735 --> 00:06:12,004
[ Man Narrating ]
This is the story
of a time long ago,
107
00:06:12,004 --> 00:06:14,107
a time of myth and legend,
108
00:06:14,107 --> 00:06:17,143
when the ancient gods
were petty and cruel,
109
00:06:17,143 --> 00:06:19,746
and they plagued mankind
with suffering.
110
00:06:19,746 --> 00:06:23,483
Only one man dared
to challenge their power--
111
00:06:23,483 --> 00:06:25,852
Hercules.
112
00:06:25,852 --> 00:06:29,822
Hercules possessed a strength
the world had never seen,
113
00:06:29,822 --> 00:06:32,392
a strength surpassed
only by the power of his heart.
114
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:35,978
He journeyed the earth,
battling the minions
of his wicked stepmother, Hera,
115
00:06:35,978 --> 00:06:39,098
the all-powerful
queen of the gods.
116
00:06:39,098 --> 00:06:41,117
But wherever
there was evil,
117
00:06:41,117 --> 00:06:44,604
wherever an innocent
would suffer,
118
00:06:44,604 --> 00:06:46,773
there would be... Hercules.
119
00:06:46,773 --> 00:06:49,275
- [ Screeching ]
- [ Roaring ]
120
00:07:03,739 --> 00:07:04,707
Hail!
121
00:07:09,328 --> 00:07:13,266
[ Squealing ]
122
00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:17,103
Hercules!
Has he ever
done this
before?
123
00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:19,105
I can't
believe this!
124
00:07:19,105 --> 00:07:21,107
You! This is
your fault!
125
00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:23,109
Me? I didn't want this
to happen.
126
00:07:23,109 --> 00:07:26,112
I didn't turn him into a pig.
Well, whoever
had the bow did.
127
00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:29,115
I hope it was worth it.
Hey, I didn't just do it for
the money.
128
00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:31,117
That's big of you.
129
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:34,120
When you are
the single most gifted thief
that ever lived,
130
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:36,622
you've gotta find new ways
to challenge yourself.
131
00:07:36,622 --> 00:07:40,126
Stealing from a god
seemed like a good start.
You need your head read!
132
00:07:40,126 --> 00:07:42,128
Now, listen,
who has the bow?
133
00:07:42,128 --> 00:07:44,130
I didn't catch her name.
134
00:07:44,130 --> 00:07:47,133
Black hair, black leather,
sorta sexy in "tie me down
and hurt me" kind of way.
135
00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:49,135
Discord.
136
00:07:49,635 --> 00:07:51,137
You sold Artemis's bow
to Discord!
137
00:07:51,637 --> 00:07:54,507
How was I supposed to know
who she was?
Can you believe this guy?
138
00:07:54,507 --> 00:07:57,293
[ Squealing, Snorting ]
139
00:07:57,293 --> 00:08:01,297
Yeah, uh-- You know,
we're gonna have to find a way
to get that bow back.
140
00:08:01,797 --> 00:08:03,799
Come on... Herc.
141
00:08:07,303 --> 00:08:09,305
Let's go, men.
142
00:08:09,305 --> 00:08:11,190
Huh?
143
00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:18,331
[ Cackling ]
144
00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:22,835
Am I good,
or am I bad?
145
00:08:22,835 --> 00:08:24,837
Oh, the worst!
146
00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:26,839
You've outdone yourself
this time.
147
00:08:26,839 --> 00:08:28,841
I have, haven't I?
148
00:08:28,841 --> 00:08:30,843
I suppose my brother...
149
00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:33,346
is gonna have to change his name
to, um...
150
00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:35,348
Porkules?
151
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:37,350
[ Continues Cackling ]
152
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:39,352
Oh, admit it.
153
00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:41,854
You've missed me.
154
00:08:41,854 --> 00:08:43,856
Oh, let's not
get ahead of ourselves.
155
00:08:43,856 --> 00:08:46,859
This is almost as good
as killing Hercules.
156
00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:49,161
Almost.
157
00:08:49,879 --> 00:08:51,881
Unfortunately,
pig or no pig,
158
00:08:51,881 --> 00:08:55,885
Zeus's decree still protects
the little... oinker.
159
00:08:55,885 --> 00:08:59,388
True. We may not be able
to kill Hercules.
160
00:08:59,388 --> 00:09:02,892
But it's gonna be
a whole lot easier
for someone else to.
161
00:09:02,892 --> 00:09:06,596
And I think I know
just the man for the job.
162
00:09:06,596 --> 00:09:08,314
[ Snorting ]
163
00:09:10,816 --> 00:09:12,885
Say, uh,
where are we going?
164
00:09:12,885 --> 00:09:15,888
Where there's Discord,
there's Ares. We gotta get to
his temple and get the bow.
165
00:09:15,888 --> 00:09:19,275
It's the only thing that can
turn Hercules back into himself.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
166
00:09:19,275 --> 00:09:22,678
Ares, as in
God of War Ares?
Yeah.
167
00:09:22,678 --> 00:09:24,680
[ Laughs ]
Well, give him my regards.
168
00:09:24,680 --> 00:09:27,683
Tell him I really
loved what he did with
that whole Troy thing.
169
00:09:27,683 --> 00:09:30,653
Now, wait a minute.
Hercules has done
an awful lot for you.
170
00:09:30,653 --> 00:09:32,655
You owe him.
171
00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:34,957
Listen,
you and I both know...
172
00:09:34,957 --> 00:09:39,211
if the big guy could talk,
he would tell us not to
stick our necks out for him.
173
00:09:39,211 --> 00:09:42,632
Besides, he loves being a pig.
Just look at the little guy.
174
00:09:45,384 --> 00:09:47,954
[ Grunting ]
175
00:09:47,954 --> 00:09:50,389
- This is all just a joke
to you, isn't it?
- You little--
176
00:09:50,389 --> 00:09:54,543
Well, let me tell you
something, buddy-- Hercules
is the best friend I ever had.
177
00:09:54,543 --> 00:09:57,546
And you're right--
he wouldn't want us to
risk our necks to save him.
178
00:09:57,546 --> 00:09:59,415
Which is exactly why
we're going to.
179
00:09:59,415 --> 00:10:01,801
He'd do the same for me.
180
00:10:01,801 --> 00:10:04,303
Even for you.
181
00:10:04,303 --> 00:10:07,807
Much as I hate to admit it,
you've got a point.
Right. Come on.
182
00:10:07,807 --> 00:10:09,809
Just one more thing,
buddy boy.
183
00:10:09,809 --> 00:10:12,311
You touch me again,
and I'll--
184
00:10:12,311 --> 00:10:14,313
What?
185
00:10:14,313 --> 00:10:17,817
I'll... be
just as upset then
as I am now.
186
00:10:27,576 --> 00:10:30,079
[ Blade Scraping ]
187
00:10:38,671 --> 00:10:43,175
Discord, my black rose.
Where have you been?
188
00:10:43,175 --> 00:10:46,312
Don't start getting
possessive on me, Colchis.
189
00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:49,265
You're lucky I'm consorting
with a mortal at all.
190
00:10:49,265 --> 00:10:51,267
"Consort"?
191
00:10:51,267 --> 00:10:54,186
Interesting choice of words
for what we've done together.
192
00:10:54,186 --> 00:10:56,188
Don't flatter yourself,
lover.
193
00:10:56,605 --> 00:10:58,474
I've been around
since time began.
194
00:10:58,891 --> 00:11:01,694
You couldn't even begin
to count the notches
on my bedpost.
195
00:11:01,694 --> 00:11:05,231
What can I say?
I love a woman
with experience.
196
00:11:05,231 --> 00:11:07,717
I want you to do something
for me.
197
00:11:07,717 --> 00:11:09,719
I hope it involves
candle wax.
198
00:11:09,719 --> 00:11:11,721
You say
the sweetest things.
199
00:11:11,721 --> 00:11:13,723
But no,
it involves a pig.
200
00:11:13,723 --> 00:11:16,225
I'll try anything
once.
No, you moron.
201
00:11:16,225 --> 00:11:20,196
I'm talking about
a very special pig.
202
00:11:20,196 --> 00:11:22,698
A pig I want you to kill.
203
00:11:22,698 --> 00:11:26,202
Discord, I'm the best
hunter in the world.
Why would I want to kill a pig?
204
00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:29,588
Because this pig...
205
00:11:30,056 --> 00:11:31,557
is Hercules.
206
00:11:31,557 --> 00:11:33,476
[ Hercules Squeals ]
207
00:11:33,476 --> 00:11:35,978
It's okay, Herc.
[ Grunts Quietly ]
208
00:11:35,978 --> 00:11:38,481
Yeah, I know.
209
00:11:38,481 --> 00:11:41,300
Hey, I'll give you
ten dinar for that pig.
210
00:11:41,300 --> 00:11:43,769
Uh, no, thanks.
He's kind of
a family friend.
211
00:11:43,769 --> 00:11:46,772
Make it 15, and I'll
throw in the pants.
[ Squeals ]
212
00:11:46,772 --> 00:11:49,775
Don't get your tail
in a curl, Hercules.
I was joking.
213
00:11:49,775 --> 00:11:52,278
You'd sell your own mother
if the price was right.
214
00:11:52,278 --> 00:11:55,781
Stop looking down your nose
at me. I've had it up to
my mustache with your insults.
215
00:11:56,282 --> 00:11:58,284
Truth hurts,
doesn't it?
Yeah, so does my fist.
216
00:11:58,284 --> 00:11:59,785
Oh, yeah?
Uh-huh.
217
00:11:59,785 --> 00:12:03,038
Hand over the pig,
or suffer Discord's wrath.
218
00:12:03,038 --> 00:12:05,324
Now, I suppose
this is my fault too.
219
00:12:05,324 --> 00:12:08,327
No, it's my fault
for bothering to argue
with a chiseler like you.
220
00:12:08,327 --> 00:12:10,045
Surrender!
221
00:12:10,045 --> 00:12:12,782
A wise move.
222
00:12:12,782 --> 00:12:16,669
Now throw down your weapons
and say you're sorry.
223
00:12:18,053 --> 00:12:20,306
Pass me the pig.
What?
224
00:12:20,306 --> 00:12:24,393
- I'll get him out of here.
- I wouldn't trust you
with my lunch order.
225
00:12:26,195 --> 00:12:28,681
[ Squealing ]
No! No, Herc!
Wait!
226
00:12:28,681 --> 00:12:31,383
- [ Autolycus ]
Hercules!
- The hounds!
227
00:12:33,002 --> 00:12:34,754
Oh, way to fumble
the pigskin, pal.
228
00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:37,640
Don't start with me!
Why?
What are you gonna do?
229
00:12:37,640 --> 00:12:40,543
- Get them!
- Whoa!
230
00:12:40,543 --> 00:12:42,828
[ Shouting, Grunting ]
231
00:12:49,351 --> 00:12:51,854
[ Squealing ]
232
00:12:53,355 --> 00:12:55,224
[ Barking ]
233
00:13:06,118 --> 00:13:07,853
[ Blows Landing ]
234
00:13:07,853 --> 00:13:10,356
[ Whimpering, Whining ]
235
00:13:13,359 --> 00:13:15,227
[ Snorting ]
236
00:13:15,227 --> 00:13:17,463
[ Continues Squealing ]
237
00:13:23,202 --> 00:13:25,805
- Get in there!
- [ Yelling, Grunting Continue ]
238
00:13:35,831 --> 00:13:37,700
Aaah!
239
00:13:38,701 --> 00:13:41,537
- Capture them!
-[ Henchmen Shouting ]
240
00:13:41,537 --> 00:13:43,789
Come on!
Whoa! Whoa!
241
00:13:46,091 --> 00:13:48,093
Gangway!
242
00:13:48,093 --> 00:13:51,096
Come on!
Down here!
[ Women Gasping ]
243
00:13:51,096 --> 00:13:53,599
[ Shouting Continues ]
244
00:13:54,583 --> 00:13:57,086
[ Autolycus ]
Thank you!
245
00:13:57,086 --> 00:13:59,088
Thank you!
Thank you!
246
00:13:59,088 --> 00:14:01,090
[ Both Laughing ]
247
00:14:01,090 --> 00:14:02,591
Thanks!
248
00:14:06,412 --> 00:14:10,916
Well, ain't you
a well-dressed little morsel.
249
00:14:11,417 --> 00:14:14,737
And I just felt like
some pork chops tonight.
[ Laughing ]
250
00:14:14,737 --> 00:14:16,739
[ Squealing ]
251
00:14:30,269 --> 00:14:33,772
Where is he?
Herc? Where'd he go?
252
00:14:35,591 --> 00:14:38,077
[ Squealing ]
253
00:14:38,077 --> 00:14:40,462
- Hercules!
- [ Growling ]
254
00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:46,952
This time
there's no escape!
255
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:55,778
- Hyah!
- [ Groans ]
256
00:14:55,778 --> 00:14:57,496
Ha ha-- Oh!
257
00:14:57,496 --> 00:14:59,982
[ Grunting, Shouting ]
258
00:15:03,519 --> 00:15:06,288
[ Laughing ]
259
00:15:23,255 --> 00:15:26,408
Hyah!
[ Groans ]
260
00:15:40,439 --> 00:15:42,441
[ Panting ]
261
00:15:42,441 --> 00:15:45,945
That's right,
spread the word.
I'm a loveranda fighter.
262
00:15:45,945 --> 00:15:48,814
- [ Growls ]
- Come on. We gotta
get that wagon!
263
00:15:52,818 --> 00:15:54,620
[ Grunts ]
264
00:15:56,071 --> 00:15:58,073
Hyah! Hyah!
265
00:16:05,397 --> 00:16:07,900
[ Female Voice ]
Hi there. Nice day for a ride,
don't you think?
266
00:16:07,900 --> 00:16:09,752
[ Hercules' Voice ]
Huh?
267
00:16:09,752 --> 00:16:13,722
I'm Katherine.
It's nice to have
some company.
268
00:16:13,722 --> 00:16:18,310
- Uh, are you talking to me?
- Who else
would I be talking to?
269
00:16:18,310 --> 00:16:20,996
No offense,
but you're a pig.
270
00:16:20,996 --> 00:16:23,716
Well, have you seen
your reflection
in the river lately?
271
00:16:23,716 --> 00:16:26,101
I hate to break it to you,
but you're a pig too.
272
00:16:26,101 --> 00:16:27,803
Good point.
273
00:16:27,803 --> 00:16:31,390
- So, you got a name or what?
- I'm Hercules.
274
00:16:31,390 --> 00:16:34,994
[ Laughs ]
Yeah! Sure.
And I'm Aphrodite.
275
00:16:34,994 --> 00:16:38,947
I guess I don't blame you
for not believing me,
but I'm telling you the truth.
276
00:16:38,947 --> 00:16:40,933
Okay, I'll play along.
277
00:16:40,933 --> 00:16:43,802
If you're really
the son of Zeus,
show me how strong you are.
278
00:16:43,802 --> 00:16:47,639
I can't. The truth is,
I'm having a little trouble
getting used to this body.
279
00:16:47,639 --> 00:16:49,558
[ Giggles ]
I'm not.
280
00:16:49,558 --> 00:16:51,060
[ Mutters ]
Oh, boy.
281
00:16:56,498 --> 00:16:59,501
Slow down, will ya?
We can't afford
to slow down!
282
00:16:59,501 --> 00:17:02,504
We gotta get Hercules
before those killers do.
283
00:17:02,504 --> 00:17:04,506
If you had trusted me
back there,
284
00:17:04,506 --> 00:17:06,508
Hercules would be
safe and sound.
285
00:17:06,508 --> 00:17:09,511
Or maybe you'd have
sold him off
to the highest bidder.
286
00:17:09,511 --> 00:17:14,016
You got me all wrong, curly.
I may be a thief, but there are
some things even I won't do.
287
00:17:14,016 --> 00:17:16,018
Like what?
288
00:17:16,018 --> 00:17:18,020
Like...
289
00:17:18,020 --> 00:17:20,022
I won't drink
red wine with fish.
290
00:17:20,522 --> 00:17:23,025
I won't eat
the horse I rode in on.
291
00:17:23,525 --> 00:17:26,028
And I would never,
never sell out a friend,
292
00:17:26,028 --> 00:17:28,530
which, of course,
does not apply to you.
293
00:17:28,530 --> 00:17:31,033
Yeah, well, thanks
for clearing that up.
294
00:17:31,033 --> 00:17:34,670
Oh, boy.
There's gotta be
over a dozen tracks here.
295
00:17:34,670 --> 00:17:37,406
[ Sighs ]
Got a lot of ground
to cover.
296
00:17:37,406 --> 00:17:41,293
Aw, hold your camels,
Cleopatra.
My feet are killing me.
297
00:17:41,293 --> 00:17:44,396
Wait a minute.
That's it! Feet!
298
00:17:44,396 --> 00:17:49,284
If we had Hermes' sandals,
we could cover
this entire province in no time!
299
00:17:49,284 --> 00:17:52,654
Oh, sure, and he'll be more
than happy to give them to us.
300
00:17:52,654 --> 00:17:54,656
Have you lost
a wagon wheel?
301
00:17:54,656 --> 00:17:58,527
Wait a second. Aren't you
the King of Thieves?
302
00:17:58,527 --> 00:18:00,896
Oh, not up to
the challenge, huh?
303
00:18:00,896 --> 00:18:03,398
Oh, I see how you are,
Mr. Morals.
304
00:18:03,398 --> 00:18:06,401
Stealing is okay
as long as it suits you, huh?
305
00:18:06,401 --> 00:18:08,403
Listen,
we don't have a choice.
306
00:18:08,403 --> 00:18:11,406
Besides,
we can return the sandals
after we're done.
307
00:18:11,406 --> 00:18:13,408
All right.
308
00:18:13,408 --> 00:18:16,411
I'll help you
steal those sandals.
But we do it my way,capisce?
309
00:18:16,411 --> 00:18:18,413
Yeah. Sure.
310
00:18:18,413 --> 00:18:21,283
Now, come on!
I know where
we can find Hermes!
311
00:18:21,283 --> 00:18:23,435
Oh, you gotta be kidding me.
312
00:18:23,435 --> 00:18:25,354
Come on,
get the lead out!
313
00:18:25,354 --> 00:18:27,356
Yeah, yeah.
[ Sighs ]
314
00:18:29,308 --> 00:18:32,811
Hyah! Giddap!
Come on!
315
00:18:32,811 --> 00:18:35,814
[ Katherine ]
I knew there was more
to life than the farm,
316
00:18:35,814 --> 00:18:38,684
but I didn't realize
the world was so big.
317
00:18:38,684 --> 00:18:40,536
How'd you get here,
anyway?
318
00:18:40,536 --> 00:18:43,038
See, my folks
are what you call
traditional.
319
00:18:43,038 --> 00:18:46,792
They still treat me
like a baby,
so I ran away.
320
00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:50,078
Your parents are probably
worried about you, Katherine.
The world's a dangerous place.
321
00:18:50,579 --> 00:18:54,082
Yeah, well,
thanks, Hercules, but I
can take care of myself.
322
00:18:56,552 --> 00:19:00,405
Well, Colchis,
your little outing today
was a complete success...
323
00:19:00,405 --> 00:19:03,408
if you were looking
to embarrass yourself.
324
00:19:03,408 --> 00:19:06,912
It's not my fault, Discord.
I've never seen ham
run so fast.
325
00:19:06,912 --> 00:19:10,916
If you don't find that pig
your name's mud.
326
00:19:10,916 --> 00:19:13,418
I love it
when you talk dirty.
327
00:19:13,418 --> 00:19:16,421
Let me put it to you
another way.
328
00:19:16,922 --> 00:19:20,425
No pork, no party.
329
00:19:20,425 --> 00:19:23,428
Why didn't you say so
in the first place?
330
00:19:27,900 --> 00:19:29,902
I'll find him.
331
00:19:34,756 --> 00:19:38,060
So, this is where
you spend your nights.
332
00:19:38,060 --> 00:19:40,963
Classy.
333
00:19:40,963 --> 00:19:42,464
I can see why
you've been so secretive,
334
00:19:42,948 --> 00:19:45,434
playing house
with that pathetic excuse
for a warrior.
335
00:19:45,918 --> 00:19:50,422
There's nothing wrong
with a little diversion
from time to time.
336
00:19:50,422 --> 00:19:53,425
Besides, you've been
such a party pooper lately,
337
00:19:53,425 --> 00:19:55,928
and you know
how I hate to sleep alone.
338
00:19:55,928 --> 00:19:57,429
Make no mistake, Discord.
339
00:19:57,930 --> 00:20:03,285
If your little taxidermist
fails again, I'll make sure
he sleeps six feet underground.
340
00:20:03,285 --> 00:20:05,687
Stay out of this, Ares.
341
00:20:05,687 --> 00:20:10,142
If Colchis fails me,
I'll deal with him
in my own way.
342
00:20:11,610 --> 00:20:13,996
If I didn't know you better,
343
00:20:13,996 --> 00:20:17,282
I'd say you actually care
for that knuckle-dragger.
344
00:20:17,282 --> 00:20:21,136
And if I didn't
know you better,
345
00:20:21,136 --> 00:20:23,138
I'd say you were jealous.
346
00:20:30,896 --> 00:20:33,582
[ Audience Shouting ]
[ Women Screaming ]
347
00:20:33,582 --> 00:20:35,584
[ Man #1 ]
Dirty mama!
She's gonna compete!
348
00:20:36,084 --> 00:20:39,054
[ Man #2 ]
I give her
six-to-one odds!
349
00:20:39,054 --> 00:20:41,440
Ten dinars
on 39!
350
00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:44,142
I'm in for 20.
All right!
[ Laughing ]
351
00:20:48,113 --> 00:20:49,615
This thing itches.
352
00:20:50,115 --> 00:20:52,117
You said he knows
what you look like.
353
00:20:52,117 --> 00:20:55,871
Just keep your yap shut
and let me do the talking.
Okay.
354
00:20:55,871 --> 00:20:58,624
- [ Screaming,
Grunting Continue ]
- [ Continues Laughing ]
355
00:21:00,125 --> 00:21:02,628
You, sir.
Uh, me?
356
00:21:03,128 --> 00:21:07,132
If I'm not mistaken,
and I never am,
you're a god, aren't you?
357
00:21:07,132 --> 00:21:09,134
Yeah.
358
00:21:09,134 --> 00:21:12,137
Doesn't mean
you don't get tired.
Am I right?
359
00:21:12,137 --> 00:21:16,141
Let me ask you something.
Are you overworked? Underpaid?
[ Grunting Affirmatively ]
360
00:21:16,141 --> 00:21:18,143
And altogether
unappreciated?
[ Scoffs ]
361
00:21:18,143 --> 00:21:22,147
[ Laughs ] Well, brother,
we got the cure
for what ails you.
362
00:21:22,147 --> 00:21:24,650
You have?
We certainly do.
363
00:21:24,650 --> 00:21:27,636
Why, our fine line
of skin care products...
364
00:21:27,636 --> 00:21:31,006
will leave you feeling fresh
as the day Zeus made you.
365
00:21:31,006 --> 00:21:33,642
We start out
with sandalwood oil...
366
00:21:33,642 --> 00:21:36,328
and a brisk massage
to loosen up
those aching muscles.
367
00:21:36,328 --> 00:21:38,547
But I don't-- Aaah!
368
00:21:38,547 --> 00:21:41,016
Kids,
don't try this at home.
369
00:21:41,016 --> 00:21:43,802
[ Yelling, Grunting ]
370
00:21:44,786 --> 00:21:47,155
We follow that with
a very rare mud...
371
00:21:47,656 --> 00:21:49,908
brought in from the banks
of the River... Legasus.
372
00:21:49,908 --> 00:21:56,098
Opens the pores,
prolongs elasticity
and curls the chest hair.
373
00:21:56,098 --> 00:21:57,716
- Haven't I seen you some--
- Nope!
374
00:21:59,701 --> 00:22:02,654
And last,
but not least,
375
00:22:02,654 --> 00:22:04,656
our own
special concoction--
376
00:22:04,656 --> 00:22:06,658
reticulated
rhubarb oil.
377
00:22:06,658 --> 00:22:10,545
[ Sniffing ]
Smuggled across the sea
by seven vestal virgins.
378
00:22:10,545 --> 00:22:13,415
Where they hid the rhubarb
I can only imagine.
379
00:22:13,899 --> 00:22:15,901
No way!
Oh, yes, my friend.
Big way.
380
00:22:16,401 --> 00:22:19,404
Now, you just lie there
and let our goodies
work their magic, eh?
381
00:22:19,404 --> 00:22:23,408
And you're not satisfied
with the results, you come
and see us for a full refund.
382
00:22:23,408 --> 00:22:26,411
If you can find us.
Quick, let's am-scray.
383
00:22:26,411 --> 00:22:28,413
Pig Latin.
How appropriate.
384
00:22:28,413 --> 00:22:31,416
Rhubarb, huh?
[ Chuckling ]
385
00:22:31,416 --> 00:22:33,919
[ Squealing ]
386
00:22:35,420 --> 00:22:37,289
[ Laughing ]
387
00:22:42,878 --> 00:22:46,098
I got a bad feeling
about this place.
388
00:22:46,098 --> 00:22:48,700
I promise I won't
let anything happen to you.
389
00:22:48,700 --> 00:22:53,021
The pig's right!
We gotta find a way
out of here!
390
00:22:53,021 --> 00:22:54,940
Relax, Woolus.
391
00:22:54,940 --> 00:22:58,810
Three meals a day,
warm place to sleep.
Could be worse.
392
00:22:58,810 --> 00:23:03,648
Uh-uh. No. 'Member Cluckus,
that rooster who thought
he owned the place?
393
00:23:03,648 --> 00:23:07,652
They took him away.
We never heard from him again.
394
00:23:07,652 --> 00:23:09,421
What you talkin' 'bout,
Woolus?
395
00:23:09,421 --> 00:23:13,091
Why on earth would anyone
want to hurt us?
396
00:23:13,091 --> 00:23:14,810
For food.
397
00:23:14,810 --> 00:23:16,812
I'm sorry to tell you this,
but we're in a slaughterhouse.
398
00:23:16,812 --> 00:23:19,314
The man who brought us here
is a butcher.
399
00:23:19,314 --> 00:23:21,316
What do you know?
400
00:23:21,316 --> 00:23:24,069
You're just a common pig.
401
00:23:24,069 --> 00:23:27,789
[ Squawks ] Maybe so, daddy-o,
but he's a pig with a point.
402
00:23:27,789 --> 00:23:31,293
Truth of it is,
I've seen animals like you
come and go for years.
403
00:23:31,293 --> 00:23:34,012
I'm sorry, folks.
There's nothing you can do.
404
00:23:34,896 --> 00:23:36,898
So, tell me,
405
00:23:36,898 --> 00:23:39,401
what was it like
watching the King of Thieves
in action?
406
00:23:39,401 --> 00:23:42,337
From what I saw,
I'm surprised you're not
in prison already.
407
00:23:42,337 --> 00:23:44,339
In case
you haven't noticed,
408
00:23:44,339 --> 00:23:46,842
I swindled two gods
in one day.
409
00:23:46,842 --> 00:23:50,712
Now, [ Chuckles ]
I hate to toot my own horn,
but, uh, toot-toot.
410
00:23:50,712 --> 00:23:54,049
For your information,
I used to be a thief,
411
00:23:54,049 --> 00:23:55,934
and you are nothing special.
412
00:23:55,934 --> 00:23:58,353
Well, then it all
makes perfect sense.
413
00:23:58,353 --> 00:24:01,356
You're jealous.
Of you? Ha!
414
00:24:01,356 --> 00:24:04,359
Hey, denial ain't just
a river in Egypt, curly.
415
00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:06,862
You look at me
and see everything
you wish you were,
416
00:24:06,862 --> 00:24:08,814
everything
you could have been
today.
417
00:24:08,814 --> 00:24:13,201
Now, listen, you--
I was ten times
the thief you are!
418
00:24:13,201 --> 00:24:15,937
"Was" being
the operative word.
Now look at you.
419
00:24:15,937 --> 00:24:19,307
You're nothing but
a water boy to a half-god--
no, to a pig!
420
00:24:19,307 --> 00:24:22,277
Well, that's because I know
that making a living out of
other people's hard work...
421
00:24:22,277 --> 00:24:24,279
is nothing different
than being a, a--
422
00:24:24,279 --> 00:24:26,648
Parasite?
Parasite! Yeah!
423
00:24:26,648 --> 00:24:29,751
Say, how's the weather
up there on your high horse?
424
00:24:29,751 --> 00:24:32,704
Oh--
425
00:24:32,704 --> 00:24:34,706
You should tell me.
426
00:24:34,706 --> 00:24:37,559
Well, it's a little windy,
actually. I-- Ooh!
427
00:24:37,559 --> 00:24:39,444
Ohh!
428
00:24:39,444 --> 00:24:42,864
Ooh! Iolaus, I--
Oh. Hah!
429
00:24:44,299 --> 00:24:46,301
Hoo! Ohh!
430
00:24:46,301 --> 00:24:48,303
[ Chuckling ]
431
00:24:48,303 --> 00:24:50,305
Look, Ma, no hands!
Ohh!
432
00:24:52,174 --> 00:24:56,428
How about that?
I could get used
to this god thing.
433
00:24:56,428 --> 00:24:58,280
Hey! Ohh!
Whoa-ho-ho-ho!
434
00:24:58,280 --> 00:25:01,099
Oooh! Ohh-ho-ho!
435
00:25:01,099 --> 00:25:03,218
- Ooh! Ooh! Whoa!
- [ Laughing ]
436
00:25:03,218 --> 00:25:05,220
Eeesh!
437
00:25:05,220 --> 00:25:08,723
Whoa-ho-ho!
Ohh!
438
00:25:08,723 --> 00:25:11,593
Stop this crazy thing!
439
00:25:11,593 --> 00:25:14,179
Whoa!
[ Yelling ]
440
00:25:14,179 --> 00:25:16,898
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Yaaah!
441
00:25:17,349 --> 00:25:20,268
[ Squawking, Clucking,
Squealing ]
Shut up, all of ya!
442
00:25:20,268 --> 00:25:23,622
And this little pig...
443
00:25:23,622 --> 00:25:28,777
went "Wee-wee-wee-wee-wee!"
all the way to
the chopping block!
444
00:25:28,777 --> 00:25:30,979
[ Laughing ]
445
00:25:30,979 --> 00:25:33,481
[ Hercules Squealing ]
446
00:25:43,158 --> 00:25:46,661
Okay, little guy,
this is gonna be
fast and painless.
447
00:25:48,630 --> 00:25:50,632
[ Chuckling ]
448
00:25:55,103 --> 00:25:58,106
[ Yelling ]
449
00:25:59,491 --> 00:26:03,228
Oooh! Ho-ho-ho!
Ohh! Ooh!
450
00:26:03,228 --> 00:26:07,515
[ Iolaus ]
Hey, Autolycus!
Come on, fly straight!
451
00:26:07,515 --> 00:26:09,251
[ Panting ]
452
00:26:09,751 --> 00:26:11,753
[ Autolycus Continues
Shouting ]
Wait!
453
00:26:20,312 --> 00:26:23,448
Okay, think, Herc.
454
00:26:23,448 --> 00:26:25,300
Whoa-ho-ho-ho!
455
00:26:25,300 --> 00:26:28,486
Whoa! Whoa!
Ohh-ho-ho!
456
00:26:28,486 --> 00:26:30,772
[ Both Grunting ]
457
00:26:35,143 --> 00:26:37,379
Good timing.
458
00:26:39,114 --> 00:26:41,333
Excuse me.
Out of the way.
Comin' through.
459
00:26:46,471 --> 00:26:48,807
[ Baaing, Squealing ]
460
00:26:49,341 --> 00:26:52,077
- Did you miss me?
- You reallyareHercules!
461
00:26:52,077 --> 00:26:55,747
- Time to get out of here.
Follow me.
- Right behind you.
462
00:27:07,976 --> 00:27:10,478
[ Panting ]
[ Cow Moos ]
463
00:27:10,478 --> 00:27:13,465
We're free!
We're free!
Whoo-hoo!
464
00:27:13,465 --> 00:27:15,850
Now's our chance!
Quickly, everyone!
465
00:27:21,122 --> 00:27:23,391
[ Panting, Gasping ]
466
00:27:25,393 --> 00:27:28,396
I gotta tell you--
this whole flying thing
is for the birds.
467
00:27:28,396 --> 00:27:30,398
You all right?
468
00:27:30,398 --> 00:27:32,400
What do you care?
469
00:27:32,400 --> 00:27:34,402
Just because
I don't like you...
470
00:27:34,402 --> 00:27:36,905
doesn't mean to say
I want you dead
or anything.
471
00:27:36,905 --> 00:27:39,908
Iolaus, that's almost
a nice thing to say.
472
00:27:39,908 --> 00:27:43,411
Well, don't let it
go to your head.
473
00:27:43,411 --> 00:27:45,413
Where's Hercules?
474
00:27:46,915 --> 00:27:48,667
Huh.
475
00:27:48,667 --> 00:27:51,870
[ Snorting ]
476
00:27:52,871 --> 00:27:54,673
[ Katherine ]
You--
477
00:27:54,673 --> 00:27:57,892
You came back to save us,
even though you could've
been killed.
478
00:27:57,892 --> 00:28:00,729
I promised I wouldn't let
anything happen to you, and--
479
00:28:00,729 --> 00:28:03,998
You were right.
The world's a dangerous place.
480
00:28:03,998 --> 00:28:06,868
I didn't know people
could be so cruel.
481
00:28:06,868 --> 00:28:09,671
Yes, they can,
but they're not all bad.
482
00:28:09,671 --> 00:28:12,557
If you're really one of them,
I guess that's true.
483
00:28:12,557 --> 00:28:14,492
I owe you one.
484
00:28:14,492 --> 00:28:17,529
[ Squawks ]
You said it!
485
00:28:17,529 --> 00:28:20,298
Hallelujah!
Free at last!
486
00:28:20,298 --> 00:28:22,600
- Thanks, Hercules.
- You're welcome.
487
00:28:25,019 --> 00:28:28,406
[ Iolaus ]
Hercules! Hey!
Come on!
488
00:28:28,406 --> 00:28:30,709
[ Snorting, Squealing ]
489
00:28:30,709 --> 00:28:33,094
Thank the gods
you're okay.
490
00:28:33,094 --> 00:28:35,914
Pig says,
"It's good to see you too."
491
00:28:37,665 --> 00:28:40,719
Wait a minute.
Are you saying
you understand him?
492
00:28:40,719 --> 00:28:42,570
Of course I can.
[ Squawks ]
493
00:28:42,570 --> 00:28:46,941
That's the problem with humans.
You never take the time
to listen to us animals.
494
00:28:46,941 --> 00:28:49,911
It's not bad enough
I have to listen to you
lecture me all day.
495
00:28:49,911 --> 00:28:52,163
Now I gotta take it
from birdbrain here.
496
00:28:52,163 --> 00:28:53,965
Now, now,
let's not forget,
497
00:28:53,965 --> 00:28:58,853
I can jump off this here branch
and decorate your head faster
than you can say "Sasquatch."
498
00:28:58,853 --> 00:29:01,756
- Sasquatch!
- Would you two stop it?
499
00:29:01,756 --> 00:29:04,626
Discord's men
are still on the prowl.
We gotta get someplace safe.
500
00:29:04,626 --> 00:29:06,377
[ Snorting ]
501
00:29:06,377 --> 00:29:09,597
Pig says, "We'll be
safe at Alcmene's."
[ Squawks ]
502
00:29:09,597 --> 00:29:12,851
Good thinking, Herc.
Come on. Let's go there.
503
00:29:12,851 --> 00:29:16,738
Oh, do you mind coming with us?
We could do with a translator.
504
00:29:16,738 --> 00:29:20,208
Yeah! I got
nothing better to do.
505
00:29:20,208 --> 00:29:23,211
Uh, by the way,
you got any crackers?
506
00:29:23,211 --> 00:29:26,181
You'd better not
mess up my shoulder, pal.
507
00:29:26,681 --> 00:29:28,633
[ Snorting ]
508
00:29:37,609 --> 00:29:40,094
Jason, I'm worried.
509
00:29:40,094 --> 00:29:43,097
Hercules
was supposed to be here
before lunch.
510
00:29:43,097 --> 00:29:45,099
Oh, he'll be along
soon enough.
511
00:29:45,099 --> 00:29:48,603
If we had a dinar for every time
Hercules was late because
he stopped to help somebody,
512
00:29:48,603 --> 00:29:50,605
we'd be rich by now.
513
00:29:52,507 --> 00:29:54,509
Hope she's not
roasting pork.
514
00:29:57,011 --> 00:30:00,198
- Alcmene!
- There. What did I tell you?
515
00:30:00,198 --> 00:30:02,133
[ Alcmene ]
Iolaus, where
have you been?
516
00:30:02,133 --> 00:30:05,420
And why is that pig
dressed like Hercules?
517
00:30:05,420 --> 00:30:07,272
[ Snorts ]
518
00:30:07,272 --> 00:30:09,224
Well--
Allow me to explain.
519
00:30:10,725 --> 00:30:14,729
You see, who's to say
one lifestyle
is better than another?
520
00:30:14,729 --> 00:30:17,732
Why, just the other day
I ran into a gnome--
little fella--
521
00:30:17,732 --> 00:30:19,734
Will you shut up?
522
00:30:19,734 --> 00:30:22,737
Alcmene, Hercules is--
523
00:30:22,737 --> 00:30:24,973
- Going to be late.
- No. No.
524
00:30:25,473 --> 00:30:27,809
- Um, he's--
- He's not coming, is he?
525
00:30:29,177 --> 00:30:31,179
There's no easy way
to say this.
526
00:30:31,179 --> 00:30:34,682
Alcmene, this pig...
527
00:30:34,682 --> 00:30:37,685
is... Hercules.
528
00:30:38,169 --> 00:30:40,822
- [ Snorts ]
- [ Laughs ]
529
00:30:40,822 --> 00:30:44,075
Oh, Iolaus, is this
one of your practical jokes?
530
00:30:45,360 --> 00:30:47,228
[ Sighs ]
531
00:30:47,228 --> 00:30:48,997
I'm afraid not.
532
00:30:48,997 --> 00:30:51,349
[ Snorting ]
533
00:30:51,349 --> 00:30:53,551
Hercules?
534
00:30:57,338 --> 00:30:59,224
Ohh.
[ Hercules Squeals ]
535
00:31:00,091 --> 00:31:02,093
Oh, that was smooth.
536
00:31:07,165 --> 00:31:10,168
Two pigs. Two men.
Yeah?
537
00:31:10,168 --> 00:31:12,670
One walking
with a heavier gait.
Hmm.
538
00:31:12,670 --> 00:31:15,673
He has something
on his shoulder--
a bird of some kind.
539
00:31:15,673 --> 00:31:18,810
[ Henchmen Murmuring
With Amazement ]
And look!
540
00:31:19,310 --> 00:31:21,813
The sideways shuffle
of the pig on the left
indicates...
541
00:31:22,280 --> 00:31:25,783
she can't keep her eyes
off the pig on the right.
[ Henchmen Gasping ]
542
00:31:25,783 --> 00:31:28,286
Hercules!
[ Exclaiming, Chuckling ]
543
00:31:29,787 --> 00:31:31,789
Shouldn't be far now.
544
00:31:31,789 --> 00:31:33,791
[ Horse Whinnies ]
545
00:31:36,227 --> 00:31:39,731
Sweetheart?
Are you all right?
546
00:31:39,731 --> 00:31:42,233
Oh, Jason,
I had the worst dream.
547
00:31:42,233 --> 00:31:44,736
Hercules was
turned into a pig.
548
00:31:45,737 --> 00:31:48,239
I'm afraid
that was no dream.
549
00:31:48,239 --> 00:31:50,108
[ Snorting ]
550
00:31:50,108 --> 00:31:51,993
[ Gasps ]
551
00:31:51,993 --> 00:31:54,495
But... how?
552
00:31:54,495 --> 00:31:56,497
Well...
553
00:31:56,497 --> 00:31:58,499
it's a long story,
Alcmene.
554
00:31:58,499 --> 00:32:02,003
Let's just say
that Ares and Discord
are up to their old tricks.
555
00:32:02,003 --> 00:32:06,507
Hercules,
come here, sweetheart.
556
00:32:09,494 --> 00:32:11,996
It doesn't matter.
557
00:32:11,996 --> 00:32:14,999
I still love you.
I always will.
558
00:32:14,999 --> 00:32:17,468
That goes for me too,
buddy.
559
00:32:19,804 --> 00:32:21,322
[ Squealing, Snorting ]
560
00:32:21,322 --> 00:32:25,143
By the way,
who's your friend?
561
00:32:25,143 --> 00:32:30,081
[ Squawks ] That's Katherine.
Your son rescued us
from a butcher, ma'am.
562
00:32:30,548 --> 00:32:32,550
I told you he was
helping someone.
563
00:32:33,051 --> 00:32:37,555
So, you got yourself
a new girlfriend, huh?
You deviled ham, you.
564
00:32:38,539 --> 00:32:40,041
[ Whispers ]
Oh, please.
565
00:32:40,041 --> 00:32:42,977
Any friend of Hercules
is welcome in our home.
566
00:32:42,977 --> 00:32:44,946
[ Squeals ]
567
00:32:44,946 --> 00:32:47,649
She seems very sweet, son.
568
00:32:49,384 --> 00:32:51,386
Light 'em up, men.
569
00:32:51,386 --> 00:32:54,389
Be ready!
Yeah!
570
00:32:54,389 --> 00:32:57,375
Little pig, little pig,
571
00:32:57,375 --> 00:33:00,778
let me in,
or I'll huff and I'll puff
and I'll...
572
00:33:00,778 --> 00:33:03,648
burn your house down!
573
00:33:03,648 --> 00:33:05,583
[ Henchmen Shouting ]
[ Squeals ]
574
00:33:08,636 --> 00:33:11,122
- What are we going to do?
- [ Snorts ]
575
00:33:11,122 --> 00:33:14,075
We're gonna fight.
That's what we're gonna do.
576
00:33:14,075 --> 00:33:16,928
Yeah, we're gonna--
We're gonna do what?
577
00:33:16,928 --> 00:33:20,531
- Stay close to me, Katherine.
- My turn to help you, Hercules.
578
00:33:20,531 --> 00:33:22,667
No, Katherine! Wait!
579
00:33:22,667 --> 00:33:25,787
[ Squealing ]
[ Shouting Continues ]
580
00:33:29,207 --> 00:33:32,126
- There he is! Grab him!
- Yeah! Yeah!
581
00:33:32,126 --> 00:33:33,628
There he is!
Yeah!
Alley oop!
582
00:33:33,628 --> 00:33:35,630
Too easy.
583
00:33:35,630 --> 00:33:37,515
Discord will be pleased.
584
00:33:37,515 --> 00:33:40,468
To the temple!
[ Shouting Continues ]
585
00:33:46,007 --> 00:33:49,010
Oh, those morons.
They got the wrong pig.
586
00:33:49,010 --> 00:33:50,728
[ Snorting ]
587
00:33:50,728 --> 00:33:52,497
Yeah.
588
00:33:52,497 --> 00:33:56,000
But if I know my pal,
we're about to embark
on a rescue mission.
589
00:33:56,000 --> 00:33:59,353
- [ Squealing ]
- Not to mention,
we still need that bow.
590
00:33:59,854 --> 00:34:02,356
[ Chuckling ]
Oh, well, well, well.
591
00:34:02,356 --> 00:34:04,358
What?
What did I do now?
592
00:34:04,358 --> 00:34:07,862
Well, for a moment there,
it sounded like
you cared.
593
00:34:07,862 --> 00:34:10,865
Yeah, well,
don't let it
go to your head.
594
00:34:10,865 --> 00:34:13,117
So, what are we
waiting for?
595
00:34:13,117 --> 00:34:16,337
- [ Squealing ]
- [ Squawking ]
596
00:34:19,223 --> 00:34:21,409
Uh-huh. Right on!
[ Squawks ]
597
00:34:21,409 --> 00:34:24,846
- [ Continues Snorting ]
-The sandals? Ah!
598
00:34:24,846 --> 00:34:27,882
Okay, then.
Listen up, everybody.
Here's the plan.
599
00:34:27,882 --> 00:34:30,301
[ Squawks ]
600
00:34:37,725 --> 00:34:40,228
[ Snorting, Squealing ]
601
00:34:41,229 --> 00:34:45,249
All right.
Let's see the sausage.
602
00:34:45,249 --> 00:34:47,251
I thought
you'd never ask.
603
00:34:47,251 --> 00:34:50,254
Cool it, Colchis.
I'm talking
about the pig.
604
00:34:50,254 --> 00:34:52,256
Of course.
605
00:34:53,257 --> 00:34:55,259
Well,
my little love muffin,
606
00:34:55,259 --> 00:34:57,695
are you ready to rumba?
607
00:34:58,696 --> 00:35:01,199
You idiot!
This isn't Hercules!
608
00:35:01,199 --> 00:35:03,167
What?
That pig's a girl!
609
00:35:05,136 --> 00:35:07,138
Oh, Discord,
610
00:35:07,638 --> 00:35:10,875
I'm afraid your...
boy toy...
611
00:35:10,875 --> 00:35:12,910
has embarrassed us
long enough.
612
00:35:12,910 --> 00:35:16,314
No. Please. Give me
one more chance.
613
00:35:16,314 --> 00:35:19,734
Hey! You're fired.
614
00:35:19,734 --> 00:35:21,986
[ Screaming ]
615
00:35:24,489 --> 00:35:26,040
Oh, boys!
616
00:35:26,040 --> 00:35:28,926
[ Both Grunting ]
Excuse me.
617
00:35:28,926 --> 00:35:30,511
I'm lost.
618
00:35:30,511 --> 00:35:32,880
Can you help me?
619
00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:35,616
- [ Grunts ]
- [ Yells ]
620
00:35:35,616 --> 00:35:37,401
Ohh!
[ Screams ]
621
00:35:37,401 --> 00:35:40,054
- Look out!
- [ Grunting, Yelling ]
622
00:35:43,224 --> 00:35:45,610
That's what happens
when you mess withmyson.
623
00:35:47,478 --> 00:35:50,481
Can you
take care of him?
My pleasure.
624
00:35:52,984 --> 00:35:54,735
[ Groans ]
625
00:35:59,540 --> 00:36:01,542
I wasn't done
with him yet!
626
00:36:01,542 --> 00:36:03,511
Well, I was.
You had no right!
627
00:36:03,511 --> 00:36:07,014
And you have no taste!
I've seen more imposing shrubs!
Oh, please.
628
00:36:07,014 --> 00:36:11,018
Don't even get me started on
the skeezes that slink out of
your temple in the morning.
629
00:36:11,018 --> 00:36:13,888
[ Ares ]
Well, the mortal the merrier,
that's what I always say.
630
00:36:13,888 --> 00:36:15,857
It's disgusting!
Oh!
631
00:36:15,857 --> 00:36:18,860
Sounds like jealousy
to me.
In your wildest--
632
00:36:18,860 --> 00:36:20,862
[ Laughing Nervously ]
633
00:36:23,347 --> 00:36:27,335
Don't let me interrupt.
I just dropped in
to repo the bow.
634
00:36:27,335 --> 00:36:30,171
This particular brand,
you see, has been recalled,
635
00:36:30,171 --> 00:36:33,174
and I wouldn't want
anyone to get hurt--
especially me.
636
00:36:34,859 --> 00:36:37,211
[ Yells, Groans ]
637
00:36:37,211 --> 00:36:39,714
[ Coughs ]
Oh, wow, that hurt.
638
00:36:41,649 --> 00:36:44,302
[ Shouting, Grunting ]
639
00:36:50,474 --> 00:36:53,227
Whoa! Aah!
640
00:36:56,180 --> 00:36:58,349
[ Scoffs ]
641
00:37:01,018 --> 00:37:04,438
[ Chuckles ]
Ohh! Let... me... have it!
642
00:37:04,922 --> 00:37:06,807
[ Groans ]
643
00:37:08,142 --> 00:37:10,127
I don't remember
inviting you to the barbecue,
644
00:37:10,127 --> 00:37:12,113
but if you insist--
645
00:37:12,797 --> 00:37:15,633
Whoa!
[ Groans ]
646
00:37:15,633 --> 00:37:17,268
[ Squealing ]
647
00:37:17,268 --> 00:37:19,053
[ Gasping ]
648
00:37:21,439 --> 00:37:24,825
You want it?
You got it.
649
00:37:24,825 --> 00:37:27,728
Oh! Oh! Oh!
Not the face! Not the face!
650
00:37:27,728 --> 00:37:30,564
[ Squawks ]
651
00:37:34,218 --> 00:37:37,805
- [ Continues Squawking ]
- Oh, little birdie! Ha!
652
00:37:41,042 --> 00:37:43,544
[ Squawks ]
Way to go, Flavio.
653
00:37:44,795 --> 00:37:47,148
[ Gasps, Screams ]
654
00:37:47,315 --> 00:37:50,234
[ Clucking ]
655
00:37:50,234 --> 00:37:52,370
- [ Laughing ]
- [ Laughing ]
656
00:37:52,870 --> 00:37:54,872
What's the matter, Discord?
Chicken?
657
00:38:04,382 --> 00:38:08,736
Unless you wanna be
the God of Gophers, you better
make like a tornado and blow.
658
00:38:14,342 --> 00:38:16,227
I won't forget this.
659
00:38:16,227 --> 00:38:19,764
You...are on my list.
660
00:38:19,764 --> 00:38:22,049
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
661
00:38:23,301 --> 00:38:24,986
Hey!
662
00:38:24,986 --> 00:38:28,155
- Don't forget your chicken.
-[ Discord Clucks ]
663
00:38:39,684 --> 00:38:41,168
Anytime, anywhere.
664
00:38:42,603 --> 00:38:45,106
[ Both Laughing ]
665
00:38:47,591 --> 00:38:50,011
[ Snorting ]
666
00:38:50,011 --> 00:38:51,495
Hercules!
667
00:38:51,996 --> 00:38:54,982
- Don't worry.
You're safe now.
- Thanks to you.
668
00:38:55,483 --> 00:38:59,036
Katherine, what you did was
very brave, but you shouldn't
have risked your life for me.
669
00:38:59,403 --> 00:39:00,888
I owed you one.
670
00:39:01,372 --> 00:39:03,341
Well, now we're even.
671
00:39:04,225 --> 00:39:06,227
After all
I've seen today,
672
00:39:06,227 --> 00:39:08,729
I think I made a mistake
running away.
673
00:39:08,729 --> 00:39:11,649
You know,
it's not too late
to go back.
674
00:39:11,649 --> 00:39:14,035
Will you come with me?
675
00:39:14,035 --> 00:39:16,404
It would be my pleasure
to take you home.
676
00:39:16,404 --> 00:39:19,840
Hercules, when you're
back in your body,
677
00:39:19,840 --> 00:39:21,842
would you do me
one last favor?
678
00:39:21,842 --> 00:39:23,844
Anything.
679
00:39:23,844 --> 00:39:27,031
Would you hold me
like your mother held you?
680
00:39:27,031 --> 00:39:30,117
[ Snorting ]
681
00:39:34,555 --> 00:39:36,974
- You ready, buddy?
- [ Continues Snorting ]
682
00:39:40,711 --> 00:39:42,279
[ Screaming ]
683
00:39:47,835 --> 00:39:50,237
Hercules!
Mother.
684
00:39:50,237 --> 00:39:53,741
It's so good to have you back.
It's good to be back,
believe me.
685
00:39:53,741 --> 00:39:57,745
Jason, look, I'm sorry I missed
your anniversary. I haven't
been feeling myself lately.
686
00:39:57,745 --> 00:40:00,581
Having you back's
good enough for us.
687
00:40:00,581 --> 00:40:02,950
I guess,
under different
circumstances,
688
00:40:03,451 --> 00:40:04,952
we...
689
00:40:05,453 --> 00:40:06,954
still would
hate each other.
690
00:40:07,455 --> 00:40:10,458
Yeah, well, for once
I agree with you.
691
00:40:11,459 --> 00:40:13,461
That's a start.
692
00:40:13,461 --> 00:40:15,463
Well--
693
00:40:18,215 --> 00:40:21,001
I'm glad to see you guys
getting along so well,
694
00:40:21,502 --> 00:40:24,522
because I'd like
the two of you
to do me a favor.
695
00:40:24,522 --> 00:40:27,525
Well, we took on three gods
and saved your curly tail.
696
00:40:27,525 --> 00:40:30,411
I guess we can
help you outagain.
Name it.
697
00:40:30,411 --> 00:40:33,564
First, I want you to
bring those sandals
back to Hermes...
698
00:40:33,564 --> 00:40:36,167
before
you hurt somebody.
699
00:40:36,167 --> 00:40:39,453
And I'll return
Artemis's bow myself
on the way.
700
00:40:42,323 --> 00:40:44,809
Uh, on the way?
701
00:40:44,809 --> 00:40:47,628
On the way
to take a friend home,
702
00:40:47,628 --> 00:40:49,630
like I promised.
703
00:40:49,630 --> 00:40:53,134
Oh, Mother, I'll--
I'll write.
704
00:40:57,688 --> 00:40:59,373
[ Squawks ]
705
00:41:00,875 --> 00:41:02,877
He's certifiable.
You know that.
706
00:41:02,877 --> 00:41:05,629
Yeah, and I wouldn't
have him any other way.
707
00:41:13,137 --> 00:41:15,105
[ Pig Squeals ]
53613
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