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[ Baby Cooing ] [ Breathing Heavily ]
[ Whinnies ] Whoa! Easy, easy!
There she is! Come on. Hyah!
Huh! Come on! Hyah!
Hyah!
[ Baby Cooing ]
Whoa!
Nemesis, over there! Come on!
- Hyah! - Hyah! Hyah!
[ Cooing Continues ]
[ Men Shouting In Distance ]
[ Shouting Continues ]
We got her. Get in there!
[ Chortling ]
Not with weapons, you fools! It's a woman and a baby.
- What are you afraid of? - Get her!
[ Grunting ]
[ Groaning ]
[ Whinnies ]
[ Baby Cooing ]
Aaah!
Oh!
[ Cooing ]
The baby. Get the baby! He's headed towards the falls!
[ Water Crashing Thunderously ]
[ Crying ]
[ Man ] I'll grab him!
- Ah! - Go after the baby!
- The baby! - Come on!
- No, no. Grab her! - Huh? Come on!
The baby! Ah--
[ Growling ]
Oh! [ Gulps ]
Grab her!
The baby!
Ohhh! [ Groans ]
Sorry. Guess I'm a little rusty.
-She's getting away! - [ Baby Crying ]
The baby! Get him!
Catch the horses!
We start over. We must find that baby...
or what's left of him.
[ Crying ]
[ Crying Continues ]
[ Crying Continues ]
No! [ Echoing ]
[ Iolaus ] Would you hurry up, already? I'm starving!
[ Laughing ] Very clever! [ Laughing ]
Hey, Herc, fire's nearly ready.
Boy, I'm so hungry, I could eat a really big, juicy...
great thing.
- Should we throw this one back? - The basket?
It's a baby. A b-- A baby?
Yeah. [ Chuckles ] [ Cooing ]
[ Continues Cooing ]
[ Laughs ] Look at him.
Isn't he something, huh?
Yeah. Yeah.
A baby in a basket. [ Horse Whinnies ]
Nemesis. Uh-oh.
What? Nemesis.
Ohhh!
Ohhh! Is something wrong? Are you okay?
[ Gasps ] Ohhh!
I can't believe this.
I-- I looked everywhere for you...
and-- and Evander finds you.
And you save his life.
And this would be Evander.
Yes, it would. Evander--ourbaby.
Hey. Excuse me?
Our baby.
[ Cooing ] Shh, shh, shh, shh.
Our baby?
[ Cooing ]
[ Man Narrating ] This is the story of a time long ago,
a time of myth and legend,
when the ancient gods were petty and cruel,
and they plagued mankind with suffering.
Only one man dared to challenge their power--
Hercules.
Hercules possessed a strength the world had never seen,
a strength surpassed only by the power of his heart.
He journeyed the earth, battling the minions of his wicked stepmother, Hera,
the all-powerful queen of the gods.
But wherever there was evil,
wherever an innocent would suffer,
there would be... Hercules.
- [ Screeching ] - [ Roaring ]
Hail!
[ Evander Giggling ] Iolaus?
Would you mind holding the baby?
Sure.
We need to have a talk.
There we go. Come on. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Ahhh.
After you.
Hi. I'm Iolaus. And you are? [ Laughing ]
Evander! [ Chuckling ]
You should have told me sooner. What were you waiting for?
Well, I wasn't sure how you'd react.
Oh, Nemesis. Come on. This is us. We know each other.
I wanted to be a father again,
but it would've been nice to see his first smile,
you know, help decide his name.
What, you don't like his name? Evander's a fine name.
That's not the point. What is the point?
The point is, you should've told me.
Okay, Evander, now,
since you and your mom are joining us for supper,
we're gonna need some more fish.
So, first of all,
we take Mr. Grub, put him on-- [ Cooing ]
That's right. Wichy wichy wichy!
Oh. You are hungry, aren't you? Well, this is not for you. This is for the fish.
Now, don't worry. It doesn't hurt him.
And this goes in the water, you see, and Mr. Grub goes in the water...
and he squiggles along like-- squiggly wiggly swimmy swimmy swimmy swimmy swimmy.
And along comes Mr. Fish.
And Mr. Fish, he's swimming along, you know-- [ Smooching ]
[ Giggles ]
And he sees Mr. Grub swimmy swimmy swimmy swimmy swimmy swimming!
And he opens his big ol' mouth and he goes-- [ Chomps ]
- [ Laughing ] - Yeah. That's right. [ Chomps ] Just like that! Yeah.
And then we catch him, we throw him on the fire...
and, yes, we got a toasty little stuffer!
Yum yum yum yum yum yum yum!
-[ Whimsical Noises Continue ] - [ Evander Giggling ]
[ Noises Stop ]
And, uh, that's how you catch fish.
We were just talking about fishing.
Yeah, right. Thank you, Iolaus.
Will you look after him while I wash some of his things?
Oh, sure. He can watch us catch some supper.
Ahhh.
Aw. Snag again.
Here's how you really catch fish.
See? [ Chuckles ]
Boy, you sure know how to take the fun out of fishing.
Your way takes too long.
Patience is a virtue. Besides,
you're a role model now.
Fine. Mm-hmm.
We'll do it your way. Good.
[ Exhales Deeply ]
Still say it takes too long. [ Chuckles ]
[ Coos ]
- Ow! What did you do that for? - [ Evander Giggling ]
Do what?
Shush! You're scaring the fish.
[ Coos ]
[ Evander Giggling ] What are you doing?
Fishing. Very funny. Now cut it out.
I didn't do anything. Anyway, you started it.
If you didn't do anything, how could I start it?
I didn't do anything. You did too!
I did not! I did not! Did too!
- [ Evander Crying ] - Now look what you've done.
I didn't do anything! What happened?
[ Together, Meekly ] Nothing.
Is him hungry? Hmm?
Hungry little man? [ Chuckles ]
[ Cooing ] We'll be back.
[ Together ] Bye.
Did too. Did not.
A stupid way to fish anyway. Mum-mum-myah.
- [ Cooing ] -Please understand, Evander.
I don't want to leave you,
but the soldiers are still looking for us.
I've got to lead them away from you.
I'll be back as soon as I can.
If anything happens to me,
I know Hercules will look after you...
and love you just as much as I do.
[ Cooing ]
[ Evander Crying ]
So, how do you feel about, uh, [ Sizzling ]
well, Evander.
Guess I'm still in shock about being a father again. [ Chuckles ]
It's not something we planned, but that doesn't mean I love him any less.
Your real question is how do I feel about Nemesis.
Well, I don't want you to think I'm judging her on her past actions.
I mean, just because she was the hit woman of the gods,
and had an arrow in her quiver with my name on it for no good reason--
The gods told her you were guilty of pride, arrogance and ego.
Ah. Well,
I like to think I'm above all that now. [ Chuckles ]
Like you said, the question is...
how you feel about Nemesis.
She was my childhood sweetheart,
my first grown-up love.
I don't think I'll ever lose those feelings.
Where is she?
Nemesis!
Is everything all right?
She took the horse. Where?
She's in some kind of trouble and won't tell me what it is.
We gotta find her before she gets hurt.
[ Crying ] What is it? What's wrong?
I don't know. He just ate, so he's not hungry.
Maybe he's sleepy. Gas pains.
Babies always get gas pains, don't they?
I've got Evander. You get his stuff. Right.
[ Crying Continues ]
Oh, boy.
[ Bird Caws ]
I don't think so. It's just not me.
I mean, what do I want with a palace?
Palaces are for sissies, Ares. This is a castle.
Well, I appreciate the thought, Discord.
But what does a god want with a place like this?
Everybody's gotta be somewhere.
Come on. Give it a chance. I went to a lot of trouble.
[ Mocking ] Oh, I'm sure you did.
How did you get rid of the previous occupants?
Mmm. They all kinda went mad...
and slaughtered each other.
You and your pranks.
Well, it does give the place...
a certain... cachet.
I don't know. Maybe.
Well? Where are they?
We've been up and down the river.
Nothing.
You go. Take them with you.
Use them or not, but I want Nemesis and her child.
What do you want with her? Never you mind.
And I do want them alive.
What if there's an accident? Something out of my control.
You are so impudent.
What you deserve is a good spanking.
And you are such a tease.
You may go.
[ Evander Giggling ] There you go.
[ Sighs ]
If we keep stopping like this, we're never gonna catch Nemesis. Yeah, yeah.
You're a good boy, aren't you, Evander? You are.
Are you sure you know how to do this?
It's been a while but--
[ Giggling ]
[ Laughing ] It's all coming back to me now.
[ Continues Laughing ] Good boy.
[ Whinnying ]
Come on, horse!
I don't have time for this.
-[ Horse Whinnying ] - Oh!
Whoa! Steady! Steady, girl! [ Whinnying Continues ]
Oh! Unh!
[ Groans ] Aw. Poor baby. That had to hurt.
I guess life was a lot softer...
when you were handing out punishment for the gods.
Too bad you blew it.
Too bad, too sad.
[ Groans ]
[ Groaning ]
Where did you hide him, Nemesis, the village?
You think I can't find him?
Bet I can. Running errands for Ares now, huh?
That's lame, even for you.
Whoa! [ Horse Neighs ]
Take her to the village and don't let her get away.
- Get her on her horse and watch her! - Let's go. On your feet.
[ Men Grunting ]
[ Cooing ]
Is he in there? [ Giggling ] Yeah. Hey.
Hey. [ Giggles ] Hey, little guy.
[ Coos ]
What is that?
Uh, uh, Herc?
- Whoa! - [ Evander Giggling ]
What are you doing?
Uh, nothing. Just, uh, falling down.
Why?
[ Chuckles ]
Okay. [ Chuckles ]
[ Coos ]
Herc! Look!
- What now? - See? See?
Aaah! [ Groans ]
- What's going on? - I-- I was floating.
- Floating? - Yeah.
You know, in the air. I think it was him.
- Evander? - Yeah.
Evander, will you please stop floating Uncle Iolaus?
We have to find Mommy.
I'm worried about you.
[ Sighs ]
[ Coos ]
Herc! Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're floating.
Wha--
Sit down!
It's all right. Now, stand back. [ Discord ] Where is this baby of yours?
Why, so you can take him to Ares?
I won't allow it.
Oh, you'll tell sooner or later.
Why does he want your brat anyway?
Since when did he need a reason for anything? But he can't have my son.
I would die first. That could be arranged.
Is one of these peasants hiding him?
No. What is your problem with me? We always got along okay.
You had the sweetest deal in Olympus--
a license to kill.
I was made for that job, but would they give me a shot?
No. Not after you screwed things up.
That's my problem. That and Ares always had a thing for you...
because you're an executioner.
I have always despised him. You can tell him yourself soon.
That kid is here and I am going to find him.
I want a post in the ground here.
Yes, you're hungry, aren't you? [ Cow Moos ]
[ Mooing Continues ]
Soon. [ Grunting ]
[ Breathing Heavily ]
Who said cows give milk? No way.
You have to take it.
You're a wreck. Yeah? You should see the cow.
[ Bellowing ] There's a village up ahead.
We'll ask if anyone's seen Nemesis.
[ Exhales Deeply ] [ Cooing ]
Look at this, would you?
[ Chuckles ] What an appetite.
This woman has brought the wrath of the gods down upon this village!
Show me the child and no one will suffer!
She'll be the first to burn, then one of you!
[ Murmuring ]
[ Woman ] What is he talking about? Looks like we found Mommy.
Show me the baby!
- Last chance. Give up the child and save yourself! - Leave these people alone!
- Hey, fellas! - [ Grumble ]
- Mothers know best. - Get him.
[ Shouting ]
Left holding the baby.
[ Man Yelling ]
- [ Bystanders Gasp ] - Oh, this is great.
Uh, here! [ Groans ]
Could you, uh, hold the baby?
Aaaah!
- [ Grunts ] - [ Bystanders Gasp ]
Ah-ah-ah! Can't have a fire here.
[ Grunts ] No permit.
[ Men Yelling ]
- [ Coos ] - Wha--
What's going on?
- [ Clang ] - [ Coos ]
[ Breathing Heavily ]
Ah, Discord. Still carrying a torch for me, I see.
Hercules. Why am I not surprised?
Here to see your old flame? Well, why not?
[ Bystanders Gasping ]
[ Man ] Oh, no. No.
[ Men Yelling ]
[Both Screaming ]
[ Woman ] Oh!
We need to talk.
[ Cooing ] Here you are.
Thanks, Evander! [ Groans ]
[ Men Yelling In Distance ] Herc.
[ Yelling Continues ]
Get them out of here. Come on. Come on.
Ooh!
Aaah!
Aaah!
The forest. Yeah.
Quick! On your feet! Don't let him get away!
Quick! After them!
Go! Out of the way! Come on! Come on! Okay, here we go.
Let's go! Ram it! Herc?
[ Yelling ]
Herc! Herc!
[ Groaning ]
Ah. Can't leave this door ajar. [ Giggles ]
[ Wolf Howling ]
[ Cooing ]
Here. Let me.
I know how to burp a baby.
Gently, Hercules.
Verygently.
[ Cooing ]
When are you gonna talk to me Nemesis?
What kind of trouble are you in?
- I'm here to help. - The best way you can help...
is to keep Evander safe while I take care of it.
We tried that already, and you nearly got yourself killed.
Now, stop playing games with me.
Of course I'll keep him safe.
He's my son.
I wouldn't let anything happen to this little guy.
[ Cooing ]
There's so much I want to share with him--
things I want to teach him.
I am going to be the best dad to you, Evander.
[ Cooing Continues ]
My son.
What's wrong?
I feel so ashamed.
You're the one person I trust completely...
and I lied to you.
You're not Evander's father.
- Then who is? - Ares.
My brother?
I am so sorry.
[ Huffs ] If I said I understand, I'd be lying to you.
I don't. Why would you get involved with Ares?
Ares came to me.
He promised I could be a god again if I gave him a son.
I was afraid of being mortal,
not knowing what to expect.
[ Sighs ] I was weak and foolish. I believed him.
Ares never kept a promise in his never-ending life. But I'm glad he didn't.
It would have been a big mistake.
I don't want to be one of them any longer.
The gods laugh and they play,
but I don't know one who feels real joy.
[ Cooing ] They have more than enough passion, but...
do you know one who really loves?
Would I love my little Evander the same if I didn't have this mortal heart?
I like my life the way it is now.
But why would Ares be after Evander?
He cares nothing for any of his children.
Evander inherited some qualities from his father.
[ Burps ]
-[ Thunder Rumbles ] - Whoa.
What have you been feeding this kid?
Look, if Ares gets his hands on him,
he'll turn my baby into a monster like himself.
That... is not gonna happen.
We won't let it happen.
We can teach him right from wrong.
He'll be a good man...
even if Ares is his father.
[ Ares ] This is not just any child. He's special.
He has the potential, eventually,
to destroy Hercules.
Why don't we simplify? I'll kill Hercules.
I'm a god. I've got the goods.
Hmm. As much as I admire your... goods,
I'm afraid it won't work.
You see, one god cannot kill another.
And I don't even want to think about the penalty.
Unfortunately, Zeus has extended the rule...
to protect my mongrel half-god brother as well.
So how's the baby mortal gonna do the job?
Well, that's just it. He's not all mortal.
You see, like my brother, the baby has some godly blood as well.
And the "no kill" rule doesn't apply...
if the one doing the killing is not a full god.
I get it. I get it!
He's Hercules' son!
You'll use his own son to kill him.
[ Seductively ] Ooh. You're so bad.
And don't you dare deviate from my plan.
Telling a deviant not to deviate--
that's not fair.
Goochy goochy goo. Good little boy. [ Coos ]
[ Laughing ]
[ Passes Gas ]
Oh, uh, we could use some attention here.
Fresh diaper? Yeah. That'd be my guess.
He has that certain air about him. [ Giggling ]
Well, go on, Uncle Iolaus.
You, uh, do the honors there.
Uncle Iolaus.
I like that. Yes, I do.
[ Inhales Sharply ] I'll pass.
Ah-ah-ah. I'll do it.
[ Evander Cooing ] Come on,bubbela.
Let's you and me take care of business.
[ Evander Cooing ]
He would be such a good father. Yeah, he would.
He was.
Great. [ Evander Coos ]
I still love him, Iolaus.
I guess I always will.
Yeah. He feels the same.
You know that.
What is it?
[ Sighs ] It's not my place to say, but--
But? [ Sighs ]
He would've helped you anyway--
without the lie.
[ Exhales Deeply ] You know, when you told him he was a father again,
it was the best surprise of his life--
then, you take it away again.
[ Sighs ] Like I said, it's not my place--
No. No, it is your place.
You love him too. He's like your own brother.
And I hurt him. I know I hurt him, and I'm sorry.
I knew he would help me,
and I knew you would too.
I should have believed in what I knew. Hmm.
Ahh.
[ Evander Cooing ]
Weare going for a walk. Yeah.
We're a lot alike, Evander.
My father is a god,
and my mother is mortal, just like your parents.
Unfortunately, our fathers aren't that reliable.
Hmm. But our mothers are wonderful.
She'll never lie to you.
She'll always do what's best for you.
She's your mother.
And as long as I'm around, no one is gonna hurt you.
I promise.
How touching to know my beloved brother is looking out for my son.
Well, we have a lot of bonding to catch up on.
I'll take him now. I don't think so.
I'm his father. You can't deny me.
Watch me.
I won't let you take away his chance to be a good man.
Good? What good is a good man?
He has a shot at greatness!
[ "Greatness" Echoing ] You don't care about your son.
Oh, I care... in my own way.
You see, Evander grown will become your worst nightmare--
yours and all thosegood men you care so much about.
I will not give him to you.
[ Nemesis ] Help, Hercules! Help!
[ Laughing ]
[ Evander Crying ] [ Ares Continues Laughing ]
[ Grunting ] No! Hercules, stay away.
Help me, Hercules. Help me. [ Laughing ]
Can I have my son back,please?
- Your son? - Don't start with me.
[ Yelps ]
Ares, please don't take him!
So, what's it gonna be, brother-- my son or your friends' lives?
Oh! I guess I meant "life."
Doesn't look like you're going to be able to save the both of them.
Don't do it, Herc!
[ Both Yelp ]
- Time is almost up. -[ Nemesis ] Oh, no.
[ Iolaus Grunting ] [ Nemesis Whimpers ]
[ Evander Crying ]
If anything happens to him,
all the gods of Olympus won't be able to protect you.
[ Evander Crying ] I'll be back for you, Evander.
Let's go.
Well? Something's wrong.
Ohhh. The child is not a full god.
You're gonna have to travel on foot while you're holding him.
Oh, what am I saying? Take a horse.
[ Snorts, Neighs ]
[ Groans ]
[ Iolaus Grunting ] Get Nemesis first.
- I'll take my chances. - I'd say your chances are close to zero.
Yeah, well, that's better than nothing.
Just hang on, buddy.
[ Whimpers ]
[ Iolaus Screams ]
[ Grunts ] Oof!
Whoa! Ooh.
[ Groans ] Well done. Great.
Ares has won, hasn't he? No way.
All we have to do is follow the horse.
Yeah.
[ Cooing ] I should have known.
Ares has thousands of children. Why are you so special?
He didn't tell me you were his, that he'd been with her--
Nemesis!
He'll go back too-- like they all do.
And she'll never refuse him--
not as long as he's got you.
[ Cooing ]
But if he didn't have you--
I've heard a mortal can drown in only a dipper of water.
And a baby would take a lot less.
An ocean wouldn't be enough.
[ Cooing ]
He's my son. You don't wanna try me.
And you...
don't wanna underestimate me.
[ Men Speaking, Indistinct ]
You were right. This is the place.
That's Meniskos, the man Ares sent after us.
Come on. Evander's inside.
It never fails.
Ares hand-picks a general for his service...
a general with a record scratched in blood,
a superb tactician, a military genius,
but as soon as he feels the hand of Ares,
as soon as he is called into Ares' personal service,
he becomes a boob!
It's happened to others...
and now it has happened to me.
I wish I were back in the field.
How I would welcome an afternoon of pillage.
This is so degrading!
Unhappy with your commission, Meniskos?
I was-- [ Clears Throat ] just explaining...
how a mortal soldier compares poorly to the brilliance of a god of war.
Oh.
Meet Evander, my son.
Evander.
What?
Isn't this perfect? Imagine Hercules suspended in midair.
- What good would his strength do him then, huh? - Not much, I would think.
[ Crying ]
Oh, Discord, please.
Say good-bye to Daddy.
Discord!
[ Men Groaning ]
Get my son away from her!
[ Crying Continues ]
Discord! Give me the baby.
- After her. - I don't think we should provoke her.
Provokeher?
[ Crying Continues ] Ares!
- You deceived me, Ares! - Discord!
I'll pen you in a catacomb for eternity!
No!
Nice catch.
Kill 'em.
- Hercules! Look out! -For Ares!
[ Breathing Heavily ] You tried to kill him!
Yes, but this is much better. This is what I wanted!
[ Yelling ]
[ Groaning ] Get him. Come on.
[ Yelling ]
Aaah!
[ Grunting ]
[ Cooing ]
[ Screaming ]
-[ Loud Thud ] - [ Gasps ]
Don't be foolish, brother. He's mine.
- Evander. - [ Coos ]
Go to Mommy. Come on, go to Mommy.
[ Cooing ]
Ohhh.
[ Growls ]
[ Growls ]
Whoooa!
[ Yelping ]
[ Coos ]
- Aaah! Ack! - [ Groans ]
[ Yelling ]
Whoooa!
[ Grunts ]
[ Whinnies ]
[ Grunts ]
[ Growls ]
Take this. [ Yells ]
[ Laughing ]
[ Laughing ]
Gimme that.
[ Growls ]
[ Grunts ]
[ Groans ]
Waaah!
[ Grunts ]
You can keep the brat!
It's not worth the aggravation.
He's too much like you.
But I'll be seeing you again, brother.
Every time you turn around, brother.
[ Giggles ]
Mmm. Oh, thank you, both of you,
for bringing us home safely.
Well, I-- I guess we'll see you again real soon.
I'll meet you at the bridge.
You gonna be okay? As long as I've got you to turn to.
You do.
You know that.
Well, I'll-- I'll leave you to say bye to Evander.
[ Evander Cooing ]
Hey, Evander.
I'll be back to see you every chance I get.
And before you know it, I'll be teaching you how to wrestle...
and throw the discus.
You don't know it now,
but one day,
you'll realize you're different.
And you'll wanna be like everyone else.
But you never will be.
You're special.
You're very special.
And that means you can make a difference.
[ Giggling ]
It's not an easy life to live,
but...
I'll be around to help.
I will always be there for you.
[ Coos ] Always.
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