Original subtitles

Hey, Seth, bro.

Um, so you haven't asked me which I want for my birthday.

Because I already know what I'm getting.

What? A little birthday card and a gift card.

What do you want?

That's it?

Yeah.

Well, I was thinking maybe help me get a new car.

You want me to get you a brand new car?

Yeah.

Like... Kind of. I want you to help convince your dad to get me a brand new

So you want me to ask my dad to get his stepdaughter a brand new car? Not his

own son, his stepdaughter?

Yeah.

No, you're fucking crazy, no.

Well, what if I do something for you and you convince him then? Tip for tackles.

You're going to have to do a lot of laundry, a lot of cooking.

My room could even use a cleaning.

Okay.

Um... Yeah, I mean... That's it?

Want to wash my car, too?

You know he'll do whatever you ask.

Fine. Fine. Okay?

But I'd like to see how you handle a big load, so... Let me go grab the laundry

and you get started with that.

Whatever.

Your bed's made.

There's the laundry.

That's it?

Yep. That's not too bad.

But that's that's uneven shit better, so you should have hangers so

Realistically big picky

Matching

pants they go with this

That was not a good fall.

No, it wasn't.

Let's take a chair.

Look, I'm feeling a little hungry, but I have a lot of work to do.

I mean, I guess I can make you something to eat.

That would be great.

Why don't you go sit down and I'll bring it out.

All right.

All

right,

breakfast is ready.

Smells good.

Do you think we could do peanut butter? I don't like mustard.

Oh, your dad likes mustard.

No, I could make you a peanut butter one instead.

Okay. Thanks.

Go sit down. Okay.

That's what you want.

Just stand there and watch.

Do you want an extra toaster?

Yeah, that'll be fine. Okay.

Oh, nice and creamy peanut butter.

Pretty good coverage of the butter.

And then we got the pure bananas.

Thank you.

That looks better. Is that better breakfast?

A lot better.

Told you I could take care of you.

You're so good with the peanut butter.

I guess I can make this for

you for breakfast tomorrow.

That'd be great.

What else are you going to do later?

Nothing, just finish up the work I got.

Well, I guess I have some more laundry of hers to fold.

Yeah, I got a little bit more for you to take care of.

I'm going to make sure I get my brand new car.

Here you go.

Those bananas are so good.

Are they?

I'm happy you like them.

Do you want another one?

Oh, yes, please.

I got plenty of bananas.

Does this make you happy, Stepbro?

Very happy.

Hey, um, what are you doing?

Well, you said I needed to be more responsible, so I thought I would look

all your bills and stuff and try and figure them out.

I'm just

trying. Most of them were adding up.

I mean, it's actually pretty good.

Really? Yeah.

There's a little stuff here.

You did all this by yourself?

Yeah. It wasn't terribly hard.

Impressive. You might want to double check it though.

Alright.

This is really impressive. This is really good.

Thank you.

It's all here. That's crazy.

You really did this all by yourself?

Yeah, I've been trying to learn.

This is great.

Maybe I don't even have to do this by myself.

Maybe you can help big bro with something else. I mean, it might be a

hard for you.

Yeah, I mean, I'm trying to get myself a new car, so as long as you convince

your dad, I'm down to help.

All right.

You do them every year for me.

I don't know about that.

Your car is a write -off.

I mean, as long as I get my car, I really don't need to be doing it

It's a big part of being an adult, so.

This isn't too hard.

Yeah, but just get any numbers wrong.

Come knocking at the door.

Nah, I think I'll be fine. They're not that, like... Yeah, they're pretty

fucking greedy. I mean, what about taxes, are they? Yeah, they're pretty

greedy about their money.

Don't forget to...

So right now, gas too. Oh, bad.

Gas is a real big write -off. I know, there's gas going up right now.

I'm going to start to... Every bit counts.

I know.

Can't forget about gas.

And then mileage.

And then... Lunch, coffee.

It's another write -off, I think.

I guess I would fall under lunch. I'm just gonna put food items

on trips.

school.

Let's see.

With gas going up, I should probably... Let's see,

put aside about this much for gas.

About 20 bucks. If I don't drive too much.

20 bucks will get you really far.

Insurance will have to pay like once a month, right?

Every month for six months, yes.

For six months?

Yeah. It comes out to about $2 ,300.

That's a lot. $2 ,300.

And the 20 times 4, it's permanent.

$2 ,300 for six months.

So I do $2 ,300 divided by 6.

Possibly $383, so it's rounded up to... 4.

38. 38 through 3.

420 times 4 is 80.

480.

It's going to be so far close to, like, $500 a month for this car.

That's crazy.

Well, just know it's all going on the tax credit, so most of it's going to be

tax rate.

I guess, but still, like, $500?

Mm -hmm.

That's a lot of money.

Wow. Hmm.

No, you actually did these files really, really good.

Did I?

Yeah, that's probably.

Thank you.

Does that look correct?

Looks correct.

Yeah? Yeah.

Let's see.

So if I get it for my birthday, along with all the cash that I'm going to get,

I should hopefully be able to get enough money so I can wrap it in something

really cute.

What color are you thinking?

I'm thinking a really cute pearlescent pink so it shines when I drive it

be pearly pink or i was thinking wouldn't it be so cute if i had like a

eagle on the hood a bald eagle on the hood yeah it's fucking wild i think it'd

be the sickest of wraps especially like a g -wag a little g -waggy

that'd be good for taxes honestly i mean if you can get your dad to

buy me one

I don't even have a G -Wagon. What are you talking about? I know, but, like,

what else is it for?

Like, you said to convince your dad to buy me a car.

We'll see.

We'll see how far we get. I still have to ask him, but... Let's

see.

I don't know. I'm impressed by how you filed all this.

I, you know, the classes aren't just for show. Sometimes I got a brain behind

it.

The next stage is now.

You know, if we put your car under an LLC, maybe we could get a better deal on

financing. I mean, yeah, if your dad just buys it through his company, I

know why it would be so hard.

Because I feel like it's totally a tax write -off.

I mean, I'm sure there's a way around it.

We could figure something out so we're paying less on it.

I mean, as long as you guys are paying, I don't know.

Well, I mean, you're going to have to put something towards it. You can't

you know, wander like you have no responsibilities.

What do you mean?

It's a present, though.

You've still got to pay for your own car insurance and your own gas.

Okay, well, yeah, you could help me pay for it. You're my brother. You're

supposed to help me.

I'm not paying your car insurance.

That's crazy. Okay, well, you could pay for my gas.

Are you going to send me to go put gas in my own car?

Yeah. No.

You're getting an expensive car with a big tank.

Like, it's going to be a lot of money.

Okay, so I'm not going to go take my car to the gas station. You're going to go

put gas in my car while I get one. I'll put sugar in your gas tank. How about

that?

I'm going to get in your car if I put sugar in my gas tank.

You know, I think you're...

Just a little off.

What do you mean?

My mouth.

I have this number. I feel like I check it.

No,

it's 41, not 40.

Okay,

you got that part right. You got the gas part right.

Gas was right.

5496. So yes, you were 400 under.

I wasn't that bad, I was just like a couple of numbers off, which is a little

too bad.

your car we're gonna have to look for something that's not too expensive i get

it you want to be nice and everything but well i haven't met on really really

cute car though you want to look it over together or oh you can't i have it i

can show you and pull it right up okay do you want to see it yeah

I was looking at this one.

It's a cute car.

Right?

It looks really expensive. How much is it? It doesn't even have a price tag on

it. It's like $65 ,000.

$65 ,000? Everything is bad, right?

$65 ,000?

Well, yeah. Is that bad? Is that a lot?

It's quite a lot of money.

I don't think so.

You could even look for a better car for less than the price.

I know, but look at how cute this car is.

Isn't it, like, cute?

Yeah, it's nice. I mean, that's... It's not a bad price for this car.

Well, really, it's really not a bad price for this car.

Well, it's older.

I think it's... Oh, it has 80 ,000 miles on it.

Okay, yeah.

That explains the price.

It's cute, though, isn't it? Yeah, it's nice. It's black.

What's wrong with black?

It gets dirty fast. It's, like, white. It's just as bad as white.

I'll send you to the car wash to wash my car.

You want me to wash your car? Well, yeah, I shouldn't have to take care of

own car.

You should have to take care of your own car.

No, I think you should.

That's nice.

It's nice and roomy. I think girls everywhere.

Seat warmers. Oh, I love seat warmers.

That's nice.

It's actually really outdated. I don't know if I like that center console.

No, you should look at the... It's not a new one.

Ooh, 2020. Oh, my God.

6x6.

There's so many wheels on that car.

I don't like that. I don't like that it looks like a truck. You know,

theoretically, it's kind of useless.

Is it? Does it work?

I mean, it works, but it's like... Oh, it's a V8? Look at that. It goes fast.

Most of the time, these trucks aren't even road legal.

Well, it doesn't really count as a truck, though.

It's... Oh, look at that interior.

It's considered a utility vehicle.

Okay, but the interior is cute, is it not?

It is.

That's a lot of fucking gas.

Oh, yeah, but you're going to be putting gas in there. And you can't even tow

with this.

Do I need a tow?

No. What do I need a tow? You just never know.

You just never know.

But, like, can't you just tow with your little car?

No. It's too small. It's like a quarter the size of that truck. Oh.

Well, why can't you just get a cooler car?

Because I don't want a cooler car.

I don't like the color. You don't like the color?

No.

That gray is so ugly and so sad and depressing.

Oh, that was a Nardo gray.

Not a Nardo gray.

Arabian gray. Arabian gray.

How fun is it?

Oh, that's so cute.

A blue one? A little blue.

Looks really low though.

Are they low? Am I crazy?

No, they're, I mean, they sit pretty high up.

Oh, look at that.

That is really pretty.

The monthly payment on this thing would be insane.

How much is it?

Let me look at the price again.

Oh, it's sold.

Oh.

Well, what was it before it sold?

I didn't see.

Let's try to find one that's not for sale.

What about this one?

I don't know about that one.

I know all the rubber duckies are always on those dashes. It doesn't stand out,

though.

It's not that bad in price.

How much?

I don't know. I don't read the whole thing.

I just thought that didn't look like a bad price for whatever there may be

advertising.

Grunge. Painted.

Protected. Oh, they're talking about the wrap. About the film.

Can I do that?

Yeah. Because that could go over the wrap to keep it from scratching.

Oh.

It's like paint protector. I know. Actually, I'm going to look up.

Hold on.

That? No, the one underneath it. That?

Yeah.

That's ugly.

It's like a wine barrier.

It's like a magenta. Do you think that's magenta?

Yeah. You think that's magenta? No. You think, hold on.

Now we're having a talk.

Magenta.

I spelled it right.

It's close. That is not magenta.

Well, look at the different shades of magenta.

That is a magenta purple. It is purple.

Oh, it's close.

That's magenta.

What?

You were not close.

That's also, like, not cute.

That's actually really nice. You think that's nice?

Yeah. I drive it.

It's a mom car.

Oh, I love it. It is a nice car.

It's a mom car, though.

I know, but it's cute. You can, like, haul everyone around in it. See, like,

look at it. Is that a complete picture of it right there?

That might be. That doesn't look like anyone that looks old.

It's, like, a 21, I think.

I was looking at the...

The ST versions of them.

You could get those up to like 700 horsepower on a tune.

It's pretty nice. I just found out that they fake their noises. You know how

they do that with the cars?

What noises? Like the... They fake the noises sometimes. It's not like a

Don't look at me like that. I swear it's a real thing.

It kind of sucks because of the new ones. They took the sunroof out.

Really? Because I had a sunroof, and it was so pretty. It was so nice. Like,

when you would drive in the summer, you would just pull, granted, in California,

not in, like, the hot desert.

It's so nice.

And then that one also had massaging seats. The new ones do not have the

massaging seats. Really?

Who do you think the newer ones would?

The off -road.

Off -road is the one that has the massaging seats. And I went, are you

me?

You get the whole, you get the whole there. You get the, like, the top is

but not massage seats.

With that trim, you have to get the off -road for the trip.

It's a weird thing to complain about right now.

I told you I was right.

You feel silly now that I told you I was right.

That's retarded.

Well, I don't make the car.

But yeah, that car.

That's still a nice car.

Right?

It'd be so cute to have it with a big bow at my birthday party.

Now you're just reaching.

What do you mean?

It's not that hard to get a big bow. Okay, I can just look up. Big bow.

Big car bow.

And it gets delivered like the next day.

See? Same day.

Same day. We'll see.

Overnight. We'll see.

I don't think it's that hard.

Nice, but like I said, we'll see.

When the time comes, we'll see.

I'm over here trying to have a wonderful birthday, and I feel like you're

really, like, trying to spoil my birthday fun.

No, I'm not.

You're not, like, supporting the fun birthday.

As a brother, you should be like, yeah, go off, have a great birthday. Yeah,

yeah, I think you should have a great birthday, but with a bow on top of the

like that, that's just freaking... I don't think so.

Have you been looking at wheels for your car or you don't care about the wheels?

Doesn't the car come with wheels?

Oh yeah, but you could always add your own little taste to it.

Like what kind of wheels would I get?

I don't know, do you want girly wheels or do you want actual wheels?

Hold on, is it girly for you?

Girly.

There's ones with hearts on them.

I've seen wheels with hearts on them. I have not seen wheels with hearts.

Really? Yeah.

They come in pink, black, white.

These are wheels or are these rims? They're rims. Wheels, rims, they have

Same shit.

Don't say same shit because it's not same shit.

Tires are different. See, that's where I get confused. I call wheels tires.

That's what I thought it was, but apparently they're not.

Oh, that's so cute though, isn't it?

Yeah, they're nice. They're expensive as fuck though. They are.

Because that's per wheel and not for the set.

Oh, that's stupid.

What do you mean that's stupid?

Per wheel, not for a set?

Yeah, that I think is like... So I'm just gonna... I'm buying one wheel.

But I have four of them. Why wouldn't they sell them in a set?

Because they just sound... Actually really cute. Some people, you know, some

people are weird and they put different wheels on the back and different wheels

on the front.

Stupid.

I don't know.

Some people do. Normal people have all the same four tires, but yeah.

That's actually really cute, the pink.

early version of wheels are there?

I don't know. I think those are the really long ones that I've seen so far.

These?

Like a flower?

That's pretty cool. That's actually really cute. It's like a dandelion.

Imagine that like a baby blue car.

Or that one.

It looks like a lily.

I think they call it a sakura.

I think so. Like a blossom?

Don't worry, I have the internet right here. I can just look it up right now.

This is a sakura flower.

It could be a cherry blossom.

We were both close.

We were both close.

Oh, they're pretty.

I think these wheels would look really cute if I got the car wrapped in pink.

The black one?

No, the...

The little pink flower.

Pink on pink?

What's wrong with pink on pink? It's a girly car.

Oh, no. I feel like too much pink just kills it.

I think you're just not seeing the vision. Everything is pink on pink on

even the interior.

Even the interior?

Okay, no.

Okay, I think you need to see it. Why don't you come down here?

Don't shake your head like that. You're going to get me my car.

I am, but like I said, you still got a long ways to go.

No, long ways is next week. My birthday is next week.

You have a goal out here. You have to get me my car.

You got a long ways to go, but we'll see.

Like I said, I didn't say, I said I'll talk to him. I didn't say what's going

happen.

Whatever, whatever. I'm sure whatever you say, your dad will get me a car.

I think we should go look at cars now.

Yeah? Let's go take a look. Let's go.