Original subtitles

There she is.

Somebody call Sports Illustrated.

Oh, let's get a picture.

Mommy!

Mommy!

Hi, baby.

Do you like the beach, Eugene?

That baby needs a spit of cloth and a nickname.

Hey, Gin.

Gin, do you mind if I run?

Bathroom, yes. Go, go, go. Oh, but we only have one. Diaper, and I'll grab it

the house. But in an hour, you have to pump.

Yes, thank you. Bye -bye.

Okay, I know Andy's involved, but this is real involved, right?

Good news.

Somebody spent too much money at the beach store.

All right, so we've got Kadima. All right.

Bunch of tights.

Is that a toss -catch game where a Velcro salad plate is strapped to your

You know, I was really hoping to read my book today, but maybe Danny or Claude

would fly a kite.

It's too windy today.

I'm pretending not to hear.

Hey, I'll play some toss -catch with you. I just need someone to hold the

Danny, come on. It's good practice.

Actually, Claude wants to take a picture with the baby, right? I got it.

Gina.

Gina's a good nickname, no?

Yes. Gino? I don't know. I think it's kind of close to Jimmy.

I think for now we're going to stick with Eugene.

Oh, Gino. I like Gino.

Okay. Big smiles.

Nailed it.

Thank God Ginny is sporty.

I feel like Jack really misses having a dude friend.

Excuse me.

I'm a dude.

Oh, okay. Do you want to go over there and talk to him about Andor? Okay. You

don't have to get all violent.

No, it's just Nick used to text him about sports and take him to see Steely

at the Prudential Center. I don't want to remember my friend like that.

No, I've been trying to connect with him and, like, boost him up, but I don't

know. It's been a long summer.

Well, you're here now.

So just relax on the beach and read your log of proofs.

Geez, I think this game might have been a little ambitious.

Haven't been keeping up on my cardio.

I'm overheated, but you keep going.

Yeah, okay.

No worries.

I'd like to talk, Kat.

All right.

Good,

look at that.

All right, athletic.

Yeah,

well. Okay.

Caught a little bit. Told you sports are dangerous when you're over 50.

Ow.

We'll get it. We'll get it.

Ooh, what's for lunch? My lobster roll that I spent all summer perfecting. And

my pasta salad, which is only okay. I just got the baby to sleep.

And Ginny.

So what's going on with your baby?

Kate said you're leaning towards adoption?

Um, well, the adoption agency actually rejected us. And now I'm remembering

she also said not to mention it. Yeah.

Tracks. Yeah. Well, they thought that I was too old. They took a look at all

this handsome and thought, Methuselah.

Crazy. So we moved on to surrogacy.

Or surrogacy.

Surrogacy. Surrogacy.

Anyway, we already had a Zoom.

With a very nice woman named Brenda.

Her internet was very stable. And if we decide that she's the one, then it's

full speed ahead.

So are people going back to the beach after this?

Maybe a Kadima attorney?

Jack, I don't know how to tell you this. I might hate beach games.

But you used to love beach games.

I feel like when we first started dating, we had a lot more in common.

She doesn't like anything I like anymore.

He didn't even want to take me to see the new Rihanna movie.

He's talking about smurfs.

No couple has things in common.

When you're dating, it just feels like you do because you're both lying to each

other to have sex.

Yeah, that's what it was. Nick and I used to read the Wall Street Journal. I

have a photo of me and Lou Dobbs at a book.

I don't think I could pretend anymore.

Honestly, that is why I am so...

Glad all of this dating bullshit is totally behind me.

Hey, was Annie implying that she's never dating again because she's, what, busy

with Jenny's baby?

Oh, I don't even think she's been on a date with Terry.

She's barely driven anywhere besides, like, her local shop, right?

My mom always used to say, the moment you give up on love... Death tips into

marrow of your bones.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God, Jack made a friend. He made a beach friend.

I didn't think middle -aged straight men could make new friends.

As unlikely as the universe.

This is Mark Brett. Hi, you can call me Mark Brett. Yeah, we just dug a really

big hole.

Cool. Is it okay if Jack stays out a little longer? I got some glow -in -the

-dark paddles. Yeah, sure.

I mean, I guess we can just open the rosé instead of those weird dark beers

you insisted on buying.

I mean,

incredible, right?

You say it then. You say it. You say it five times fast.

Mandy Patek is Potomac, Maryland. Mandy Patek is Potomac, Maryland. Mandy Patek

is Potomac, Maryland. Mandy Patek is Potomac, Maryland. Fuck you, Catherine.

Hi.

Anne, quick question. I'm going to duct tape towels to our windows to block out

all the sun in the morning. Can you please try and figure out why this

pump is not working?

Yes, I can.

Nothing in there.

Okay. Now let's put it on.

So, you must not have your nipple all the way in. Don't freak out. Okay.

Thanks, babe. Okay.

Do you want some of my love? I do.

That's good to hear. So,

uh, Anne, how does this whole, um, Jenny situation go?

You're asking because this seems weird, right? We just want to make sure they're

happy.

Okay.

You know how when you hit your 50s, you just sort of never feel joy again?

Yeah. I'm holding steady at a five at all times. Okay.

When I'm with this baby, I feel helpful, and I am good at it, and I do feel joy.

Like, real, real, real joy.

Oh, and I get to look at his sweet, squishy little face.

Oh, I just feel joy.

Crooks my molars. Yeah, but you don't have to give up everything.

I mean, you can still make dinner plans and go on dates.

I mean, a baby comes into your life, not the other way around.

Well, I'm going to a meal.

We'll have to make a few changes.

It might be a while before our baby's up for a 10 -30 dinner at Belfast.

Hey, where have you been? You missed dinner. I know, I'm sorry.

But I did eat, Martha.

Cooler had IPAs and a bunch of uncrustables.

What do you think?

Peanut butter rolled up in a sock.

Well, I'm going to shower and head to bed. I am so ready for those blackout

curtains. Hang on. Your room has blackout curtains, but ours has a baby

It was nice of you to offer to switch. Should we push the beds together?

Honestly, I'm beat.

Mark and I did so many races.

But we can move them tomorrow.

Okay.

Another Nick and Ginny Stacks noise when you think about it.

You know, when we have a baby, we have this sound all the time.

It won't be a problem, babe. I can speak to anybody.

Except you don't leap through it.

When the baby cries, you get up.

Oh, Jesus.

It's 940.

Oh, my God.

That was the best night's sleep I've had in like a year.

Is that a bummer to say? No, same.

I guess give it up for twins.

You're in a good mood. You want to go get breakfast tacos and go check out the

craft fair with me?

Oh, craft fair.

You know I hate disappointing hopeful vendors.

I was thinking I'd go down to the beach and see if Mark Pratt wants a boogie

board.

Okay. You do your thing and I'll do mine.

Great. Well, if you see that T -shirt guy, I still regret not getting that one

that said, keep calm and forget about it.

All right.

Yeah, what do we think?

I think it's pretty good. We're going to go for record heights. Oh.

Here's a kite whisperer.

Okay, here we go.

Ready?

You really zipped through that.

Oh, well, my husband's on a play date and I got nine hours of sleep last

Oh, I got through New Jersey. This bitch got room sleep.

Ann's not coming now. She said she was up late with the baby and wants to stay

home and watch Three's Company reruns with Ginny. That's too much.

You know what?

Tell her I'll take care of him tonight.

Yes. Get her out of the house.

Somebody else can watch that baby sleep and feed it through the water.

Danny, you cannot give a newborn baby water or food.

I know that.

But then, what's baby food?

For when they're older.

I know that, Catherine.

They?

I'm just kidding.

What are those two dipshits talking about?

College ball, Gatorade flavors, Black Friday sales on 350 and 50.

And when you lose a friend.

Obviously, that's hard.

But the thing I didn't expect was how that relationship was connected to every

other relationship.

I lost my dad when I was in high school. And I remember this therapist told me,

your grief doesn't get smaller.

You got to get bigger.

The Mets lost 10.

Oh, I'm going to zip up my windbreaker real mad about it.

You know, I don't know if our coach was abusive.

But in hindsight, the way that he would speak to us.

I mean, just wish that 10 -year -old you could have said, hey, this is not okay.

I mean, we were just boys.

Oh, I just bought a whiskey -flavored body wash.

I washed my tank with it.

Men do sound exactly like this.

Hey, we're going to go get a bucket of beers in town. Can Mark come to dinner?

Oh, sure, if his mom says it's okay. I know you're making fun of me, but his

is here, and he's asking her right now.

Is it just him, or is he married?

Divorced. But he and Rachel are in a really good place.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

So you mean that Mark Brett is single?

We should sit him at the end.

That's not a bad idea.

All right, right.

He's a hetero eight.

What number hetero am I? Oh, funny.

Ask him if he knows what he's worth.

Every time he has lobster servidor, he gets sick, but then he always forgets

orders it again.

I hope you don't mind seafood, Mark.

Well, as I like to say, seafood is me food.

Wait,

that's crazy. We were just talking about that shirt.

Okay, I have a confession.

We were riding our bikes and, you know... Did you go to the craft fair

me?

Are you mad?

What are the chances you'll take the shirt's advice?

Oh, what? Get away from me. There she is. Not a legend. They just eat.

Anne, this is Jack's friend, the handsome Mark Brett.

Hi. Hi. Anne, world's latest person.

Right?

She's funny. She's a funny person. Yeah.

Always handsome. This one. She's funny.

Jack's dress?

I don't know.

He's kind of boring, but he's nice enough. But he's single.

And he hasn't said a word to me all night.

He kept pouring water for you. The forearms were defined.

I promise. I meant what I said yesterday.

I'm happy.

Okay, but it's your vacation. You're not at all. Yeah, and I don't want to waste

it trying to impress some guy who's probably not going to be into it.

I want a bookmark. Oh, you scared the fuck out of me. Yeah, or you could just,

like, kiss and feel each other up.

We just met during advertisers and dessert isn't even on the table. What is

wrong with you?

I'm just concerned that your decision to co -parent your ex -husband's

girlfriend's new baby may be a small tactic because you're afraid to live

life. Oh, I'm afraid?

You're the one who wants to be a dad, and you're too scared to hold that baby.

No, I'm not.

Well... You wouldn't take the baby when I needed to go to the bathroom. I had to

lay him on a bath mat so I could wash my hands.

See?

Focus on your own problems.

I'm going to go check on Claude.

And anyway, you have a straw wrapper in your clam chowder. What?

Come on.

Well, as far as TV goes, I'm down with pretty much anything in the bush.

Yeah. Bosch, Bosch Legacy, Ballard, of course. But my all -time favorite TV

show, Three's Company.

Anne, did you hear that?

Three's Company.

I did.

What happened in the episode before this?

I don't know, but there's a lot of miscommunication.

Why can't they just say things plainly to each other, you know?

Jeannie, do you need a break?

Yes, we do.

Claude, you're taking Jenny for ice cream.

I'm going to babysit Gino.

Where's Lil' Bean?

He's upstairs, sleeping. Also, I think we're going to stick with Eugene for

Amore, are you sure?

We'll be fine.

Go, go.

I got it. Okay.

Thank you, Danny.

Have fun.

There's milk in the fridge if you need it. You can't go to that cute place on

the corner.

Yeah, good. Ciao.

Ciao.

Ah,

it's me and you, little bugger.

What are you doing?

You okay, little dude?

Or do you like any music?

Do you mean like in the world?

I don't know what I mean.

I think it's going well back there. What do you think? Don't look.

No, watch. It can be very natural.

You see the scape bird?

Where?

Huh. Must have flown away.

Hey, guys.

Who wants to sneak onto the beach with me? Oh, you guys go.

Yeah, Jack and I are going to go back.

Oh, you know what? If you guys are going to go home, I think I'm going to go

home, too.

Uh... Oh, Mark, look. Uh, booger sale on hermit crabs.

Oh, we got to do it. We got to do it. Crab brothers? Crab brothers!

Say no more.

Hey.

What's wrong with you? He's nice, and he has a job, and, you know, Jack said he

won most of their races.

You're like Rita at my shop, right? Why are all married people so obsessed with

setting up their single friends?

You know why? Because being married is weird and complicated.

You never get to have simple, bloody fun ever again.

Is there no part of you that wants that?

Okay.

How are my tits? They look great.

thing for our two best friends so what are we gonna do you want to watch a

oh yeah something we both like wait you're starting with if you like john

here you do it oh what's from mouseketeer to sex symbol

Thank you so much.

Thank you, thank you.

Oh, Claude, can you grab me one of the little papers?

The receipt?

No, the little wipey ones. Oh, my God, what is the word?

Oh, the napkin. Oh, yeah. Sorry.

Wow, I'm so brain dead.

I have not slept four straight hours in, like, a month.

Also, remember yesterday when I was throwing that ball with Jack?

No, you were tired.

I get it.

No, no, no, Claude.

I peed myself.

Oh, gosh.

I am a creature.

This is how everyone feels.

And you're doing it alone.

No, I'm not.

Anne does basically everything. And I am so grateful for her. And I really do

need her. But honestly, the more she does, the worse I feel.

Is that terrible or something?

No.

This isn't hard because you're bad at it, huh?

It's hard because it's fucking hot.

Yeah. Hey, I remember I was when my nieces were babies.

You know, it can feel like, um, you see these, um,

um, quick things.

Mm.

Eventually you come out of it, and you're so young.

You have a lot of time to uncreature.

Mm, yeah. How long does that take?

Nine years.

Nine years?

Oh, nine years. In nine years, I'll be, um, 42.

That's pretty young.

I love you for saying that.

I'm sorry for dumping all this on you.

Especially when you're trying to become a parent yourself.

That's okay.

I already know exactly how hard it is.

Do you mind if we go home to Gino?

Oh, my God! You bastard!

Gino it is!

Gino. Gino.

Wait up!

The ocean is really loud.

I'm sorry. My friends are insane in forces to do this. My married friends

always trying to set me up, too.

Maybe because it's so hard to split the dinner bill three ways.

Really, I was a little relieved when I realized that Kate and Jack were trying

to get us together.

You were?

Yeah.

Because before that, I thought the two of them were swingers.

Wait, what?

Yes, they were giving me a lot of weird compliments about my running shape, and

they both kept saying how well they slept the night before.

Oh, my God.

And when Kate mentioned Three's Company, she really hit the threes and the

company. Oh, dear.

Real hard.

She did.

They are definitely not swingers. Okay, I'm just saying, if that's their thing,

that's cool with me. It's just not mine. Okay.

Noted.

Oh, this is my sister's place.

Oh.

Do you want to come up?

Full disclosure, I am sleeping on an aero bed in the den, but it's totally

private and everything. We just have to be a little quiet because my mom's in

the front room.

But when she takes her hearing aids out... Yeah, you know, I don't think I

that tonight.

Yeah, all good.

Thank you.

Sure. It was good to meet you. Good to meet you.

Good night. Good night.

Oh! Oh, my God! Are you okay?

Uh, oh, God.

Who the fuck set this hole?

That was gonna be a moat. Oh, God, let me help you. No, thank you, Mark Brett.

Sorry.

Sandra Bullock is in Vietnam?

So, how was it?

Oh, it was exactly as B -minus as I expected it to be.

Oh, no.

You're upset?

Yeah, I'm upset.

I just had to climb out of a sand hole like I was on a Japanese game show.

I get that you guys think my life is so sad that you need to save me with a guy.

No, Ann.

We do not. But at this age, dating is a pretty surefire way to end the night

feeling shitty about yourself.

I mean, life is not a Nancy Meyers movie.

Well, well, well. Guess who's not only a hell of a baby. No, Jen, she's mad.

Fuck off.

Listen to me.

When I tell you, I know what I am doing.

Oh, what a concept. I'm a grown -ass woman.

I am happy, guys.

I'm helping to raise a fucking person.

But tonight, old eight is going to bed at a 1 .4 on the joy scale.

Okay? So thanks a lot.

Oh, I'm so sorry. No, you know what?

You guys just don't get it.

You all get to end each day next to a person you like.

Oh, and by the way, he thought Kate and Jack were coming over.

Wait,

what?

You know, you are a person I like.

You're a person I like, too.

Which is why, when you went to the craft fair without me... Knew I shouldn't

have filed that one as a closed case.

No, no, it's just... You know, like, when we're at home, sometimes it feels

we see each other, but, you know, you're watching baseball, and I'm locked out

of my New York Times account for trying the wrong password too many times. Yeah,

we don't really connect.

I'm glad you're having so much fun this week.

I just kind of wish it was with me.

This is really embarrassing.

Because you're, like, so in love with me.

Wait, can you believe Mark Brett thought we were swingers? Yeah, it's, like, so

crazy.

Do you think he was, like, into it?

I don't know. I mean, kind of fluttering, I guess.

His fingers are so crazy.

Low. Low.

I

won't

lie. Being with the baby all night was hard.

It was 90 minutes.

At least now I know I can do it, right?

I guess

this

will be our life.

Inflate the bed.

Everybody. Good night.