Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:04,767 --> 00:00:06,033
Get to the edge.
2
00:00:06,133 --> 00:00:07,933
Get to the edge.
3
00:00:09,533 --> 00:00:10,367
Absolutely, again.
4
00:00:10,467 --> 00:00:11,800
Right, just step off, love.
5
00:00:11,900 --> 00:00:12,900
Just do it.
6
00:00:18,200 --> 00:00:19,467
Oh, God no.
7
00:00:19,567 --> 00:00:21,700
I don't think I can.
8
00:00:22,733 --> 00:00:24,033
Go, Meg.
9
00:00:24,133 --> 00:00:27,000
You've done really well, mate.
10
00:00:29,067 --> 00:00:31,933
I think I've pooed my harness.
11
00:00:53,267 --> 00:00:54,833
I had an epitome.
12
00:00:54,933 --> 00:00:56,033
Epiphany or epitome?
13
00:00:56,133 --> 00:00:57,343
Well, they're
two separate words.
14
00:00:57,367 --> 00:01:00,267
OK, so I had a
moment on the plane,
15
00:01:00,367 --> 00:01:02,643
because I realized that I don't
really know what I'm doing
16
00:01:02,667 --> 00:01:04,967
with like, the rest of my life.
Do you know what I mean?
17
00:01:05,067 --> 00:01:06,967
Hardly ever, but yes.
18
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:08,833
Then I remembered
what that visionary
19
00:01:08,933 --> 00:01:10,943
said to me on the beach
before he sold me my crystal.
20
00:01:10,967 --> 00:01:12,267
Didn't he ask you for a handy?
21
00:01:12,367 --> 00:01:15,867
Well, yeah, but he also
said, ask the universe for what
22
00:01:15,967 --> 00:01:17,047
you want, and it'll happen.
23
00:01:17,100 --> 00:01:18,367
Do you want this?
24
00:01:18,467 --> 00:01:19,600
Yes.
25
00:01:19,700 --> 00:01:21,800
You see, it's weird.
26
00:01:21,900 --> 00:01:23,140
Is that to carry your necklace?
27
00:01:31,167 --> 00:01:32,467
Are you there yet, Gary?
28
00:01:34,033 --> 00:01:35,067
Gary, are you there yet?
29
00:01:36,533 --> 00:01:37,200
Time's up.
30
00:01:37,300 --> 00:01:38,967
What, I haven't finished.
31
00:01:39,067 --> 00:01:40,500
Well, I have, and I need to go.
32
00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:41,700
What about me?
33
00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:43,033
Sort yourself out.
34
00:01:47,333 --> 00:01:49,767
Gary, what are you looking at?
35
00:01:49,867 --> 00:01:50,867
Porn.
36
00:01:50,967 --> 00:01:53,600
Do you know how
insulting this is?
37
00:01:53,700 --> 00:01:55,767
I do all the same
stuff that they do.
38
00:01:55,867 --> 00:01:58,533
Oh, come on Laura, you're
not as dirty as the internet.
39
00:02:03,400 --> 00:02:06,700
OK, so I've asked the universe
to bring me to my calling.
40
00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:07,700
What, Leeds?
41
00:02:07,800 --> 00:02:09,633
Showbiz, Meg.
42
00:02:09,733 --> 00:02:10,867
What do you want?
43
00:02:10,967 --> 00:02:12,209
I want to know
what my ex-boyfriend
44
00:02:12,233 --> 00:02:13,233
is standing out there.
45
00:02:13,267 --> 00:02:16,467
Oh, um, Jesus, it's Mark.
46
00:02:16,567 --> 00:02:18,343
Why would your mental
ex-boyfriend be out there?
47
00:02:18,367 --> 00:02:19,533
Because he's mental.
48
00:02:19,633 --> 00:02:21,193
Wonder if he still
wears your underwear.
49
00:02:21,233 --> 00:02:23,233
I'm way too jet-lagged
to deal with this.
50
00:02:23,333 --> 00:02:24,467
Help me.
51
00:02:24,567 --> 00:02:26,276
I can ask the universe,
but it's not always instant.
52
00:02:26,300 --> 00:02:28,200
A sane suggestion
would be great.
53
00:02:28,300 --> 00:02:29,800
OK.
54
00:02:29,900 --> 00:02:30,800
What are we going to do?
55
00:02:30,900 --> 00:02:32,767
That's the question.
56
00:02:32,867 --> 00:02:36,000
Right, we're going to do what
all rational, adult women
57
00:02:36,100 --> 00:02:37,333
would do in this situation.
58
00:02:37,433 --> 00:02:38,333
What's that?
59
00:02:38,433 --> 00:02:39,433
Hide.
60
00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:52,933
Look, look, Laura,
look, look, Laura.
61
00:02:53,033 --> 00:02:55,267
Hi.
62
00:02:55,367 --> 00:02:56,167
Get down.
63
00:02:56,267 --> 00:02:57,367
It
64
00:02:57,467 --> 00:02:58,100
All right.
65
00:02:58,200 --> 00:02:59,033
Hey, mate.
66
00:02:59,133 --> 00:03:00,000
Why are we hiding?
67
00:03:00,100 --> 00:03:00,933
Have you nicked summat?
68
00:03:01,033 --> 00:03:01,833
No.
69
00:03:01,933 --> 00:03:04,767
Mental Mark's over there.
70
00:03:04,867 --> 00:03:05,900
I thought you broke up.
71
00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:06,867
We did.
72
00:03:06,967 --> 00:03:08,100
I'm very single now.
73
00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:09,376
Well you couldn't
remember it out there.
74
00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:10,733
Oh, what, because
I wasn't getting
75
00:03:10,833 --> 00:03:12,876
fingered by every single
tour guide in southern India?
76
00:03:12,900 --> 00:03:14,600
I've missed this.
77
00:03:14,700 --> 00:03:15,867
Do you want me to deck him?
78
00:03:15,967 --> 00:03:17,443
No, we're just going
to leave the airport
79
00:03:17,467 --> 00:03:18,700
hiding behind this trolley.
80
00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:19,800
Very well, then.
81
00:03:26,333 --> 00:03:28,033
OK.
82
00:03:28,133 --> 00:03:29,200
Coast clear.
83
00:03:32,100 --> 00:03:34,000
Hey.
84
00:03:34,100 --> 00:03:35,900
Hey.
85
00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:38,800
Thanks for picking
us up anyway, mate.
86
00:03:38,900 --> 00:03:43,000
We bought you this in India.
87
00:03:43,100 --> 00:03:45,133
Guys, I fucking love it.
88
00:03:45,233 --> 00:03:46,300
So where have you parked?
89
00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:47,033
What?
90
00:03:47,133 --> 00:03:48,667
I got the bus.
91
00:03:53,100 --> 00:03:55,533
You're right, he shouldn't
be looking at porn.
92
00:03:55,633 --> 00:03:56,800
It's degrading to women.
93
00:03:56,900 --> 00:03:57,900
I'm not arsed about that.
94
00:03:57,933 --> 00:03:59,467
I just don't get
why he needs it.
95
00:03:59,567 --> 00:04:00,667
He's got this.
96
00:04:00,767 --> 00:04:01,976
But you can't compete
with the internet, Laura,
97
00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:03,143
these women are professionals.
98
00:04:03,167 --> 00:04:04,200
So am I.
99
00:04:04,300 --> 00:04:05,700
Professional means you get paid.
100
00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:08,433
All right, well anyways,
I'm going to show him.
101
00:04:08,533 --> 00:04:10,700
I've got a sexting
mission underway.
102
00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:12,667
How do you spell tongue?
103
00:04:12,767 --> 00:04:14,767
I can't wait go straight to bed.
104
00:04:14,867 --> 00:04:16,133
Don't be a boner, mate.
105
00:04:16,233 --> 00:04:17,700
We're going out.
106
00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:18,900
Well, I'm not drinking.
107
00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:20,376
I've still got two
Valium in my system.
108
00:04:20,400 --> 00:04:21,767
So you have been to sleep.
109
00:04:21,867 --> 00:04:23,767
No, Meg is the
only person in living
110
00:04:23,867 --> 00:04:27,233
history to have taken Valium
and then had a panic attack.
111
00:04:27,333 --> 00:04:29,000
I'll say it again,
how can you be
112
00:04:29,100 --> 00:04:30,343
sure it was Valium
when you bought
113
00:04:30,367 --> 00:04:31,933
them from a rickshaw driver?
114
00:04:32,033 --> 00:04:34,567
Oh, Gary's stepped it up a gear.
115
00:04:34,667 --> 00:04:36,600
How do you spell fisting?
116
00:04:36,700 --> 00:04:38,620
I've got a really good
feeling about this summer.
117
00:04:44,033 --> 00:04:46,400
Well, this is wonderful.
118
00:04:46,500 --> 00:04:47,400
I am thrilled.
119
00:04:47,500 --> 00:04:50,133
Oh, thanks mum,
it's good to be back.
120
00:04:50,233 --> 00:04:53,767
And I would like
to propose a toast.
121
00:04:53,867 --> 00:04:57,533
To our clever son, James.
122
00:04:57,633 --> 00:05:02,100
Or should I say, James Kesick,
Executive Account Manager
123
00:05:02,200 --> 00:05:04,667
and proud owner of an Audi.
124
00:05:04,767 --> 00:05:05,600
What?
125
00:05:05,700 --> 00:05:06,567
Aren't you going to uni?
126
00:05:06,667 --> 00:05:08,600
I don't need a degree.
127
00:05:08,700 --> 00:05:10,067
I've been headhunted.
128
00:05:10,167 --> 00:05:13,733
So cheers to PPI, and to mom
and dad for supporting me.
129
00:05:13,833 --> 00:05:15,200
Congratulations, son.
130
00:05:15,300 --> 00:05:17,400
Well, I would like
to propose a toast.
131
00:05:17,500 --> 00:05:23,133
To me and Bunny, for going the
whole way around some of India
132
00:05:23,233 --> 00:05:24,933
without getting killed.
133
00:05:25,033 --> 00:05:28,567
We had to go to the embassy once
when Bunny lost her passport,
134
00:05:28,667 --> 00:05:31,433
and it was actually fine,
'cause it was in my bum bag.
135
00:05:31,533 --> 00:05:32,400
Cheers.
136
00:05:32,500 --> 00:05:33,500
Well done, guys.
137
00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:35,333
There he is.
138
00:05:35,433 --> 00:05:37,333
Give Mark a hand with
that please, James.
139
00:05:37,433 --> 00:05:38,167
Who?
140
00:05:38,267 --> 00:05:40,433
Oh great, now we're all here.
141
00:05:40,533 --> 00:05:42,067
Meggles.
142
00:05:42,167 --> 00:05:43,400
I came to the airport.
143
00:05:43,500 --> 00:05:44,500
Did you?
144
00:05:47,700 --> 00:05:48,600
What are you doing here?
145
00:05:48,700 --> 00:05:50,667
Well, I work for your dad now.
146
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:54,700
I tell you what, that
lad really knows his stone.
147
00:05:54,800 --> 00:05:58,267
And I wanted to see you.
148
00:05:58,367 --> 00:05:59,733
Do you wanna come upstairs?
149
00:05:59,833 --> 00:06:02,100
Yes, please.
150
00:06:02,200 --> 00:06:03,867
I think we should talk.
151
00:06:03,967 --> 00:06:05,800
We'll just be in my room.
152
00:06:05,900 --> 00:06:06,900
Oooh.
153
00:06:10,367 --> 00:06:12,133
Why is my room a
walk-in wardrobe?
154
00:06:12,233 --> 00:06:13,500
Didn't you know?
155
00:06:13,600 --> 00:06:16,633
No, what the fu... where
am I supposed to sleep?
156
00:06:16,733 --> 00:06:18,500
It looks so different.
157
00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:20,067
It's crazy to think
this is the room
158
00:06:20,167 --> 00:06:21,633
where I took your virginity.
159
00:06:21,733 --> 00:06:24,867
Yeah, not as crazy as saying
that in this situation, Mark.
160
00:06:24,967 --> 00:06:26,833
Oh, you silly, pretty thing.
161
00:06:26,933 --> 00:06:29,567
Come here, I've missed you.
162
00:06:29,667 --> 00:06:34,467
Yeah look, I'm really
sorry about everything.
163
00:06:34,567 --> 00:06:35,400
Are you OK?
164
00:06:35,500 --> 00:06:36,667
Yeah.
165
00:06:36,767 --> 00:06:39,267
Look, I know you want your
space and I respect that.
166
00:06:39,367 --> 00:06:40,476
But there's something
I wanted to...
167
00:06:40,500 --> 00:06:41,933
Yeah, but I didn't.
Sorry.
168
00:06:42,033 --> 00:06:42,867
You go.
169
00:06:42,967 --> 00:06:43,833
No, sorry, you go first.
170
00:06:43,933 --> 00:06:45,400
OK, well.
171
00:06:45,500 --> 00:06:46,900
Here goes.
172
00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:48,109
Oh God, please don't be a poem.
173
00:06:48,133 --> 00:06:49,033
No, I want...
174
00:06:49,133 --> 00:06:49,967
Us to still be friends, yeah.
175
00:06:50,067 --> 00:06:51,100
No, no, I want...
176
00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:52,200
Closure, I know.
177
00:06:52,267 --> 00:06:53,533
No.
178
00:06:53,633 --> 00:06:55,309
I really don't think we should
be having breakup sex, Mark.
179
00:06:55,333 --> 00:06:56,767
I want you to move in with me.
180
00:06:56,867 --> 00:06:57,967
What?
181
00:06:58,067 --> 00:06:59,967
I've rented us a
flat in Headingley,
182
00:07:00,067 --> 00:07:03,333
in case you're wondering
where all your stuff is.
183
00:07:03,433 --> 00:07:05,100
I love you.
184
00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:08,333
Oh my god.
185
00:07:08,433 --> 00:07:12,300
I suddenly feel very
jet-lagged, Mark.
186
00:07:12,400 --> 00:07:17,033
I'm just going to lie
down on these bags.
187
00:07:21,067 --> 00:07:23,200
He's not my boyfriend.
188
00:07:23,300 --> 00:07:26,433
He's a deluded, emotionally
unstable psychopath.
189
00:07:26,533 --> 00:07:29,100
I don't want to be near him,
let alone living with him.
190
00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:30,367
She's very tired.
191
00:07:30,467 --> 00:07:32,733
Well, I changed
our relationship status
192
00:07:32,833 --> 00:07:34,267
on Facebook.
193
00:07:34,367 --> 00:07:36,176
If that isn't breaking up with
him, I don't known what is.
194
00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:37,500
He tried to cut all my hair...
195
00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:39,043
Girls are looking
pretty in their summer
196
00:07:39,067 --> 00:07:40,900
frocks, well, skimpy
shorts and bikini...
197
00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:42,867
Think I'll go
back to the new pad.
198
00:07:42,967 --> 00:07:44,400
Tell her I'll see her there.
199
00:07:44,500 --> 00:07:45,833
OK, bye Mark.
200
00:07:45,933 --> 00:07:47,033
See you, Mark.
201
00:07:47,133 --> 00:07:48,833
- Laters.
- What am I going to do?
202
00:07:48,933 --> 00:07:50,833
Well, you're a
grown up now, Meg.
203
00:07:50,933 --> 00:07:51,933
Move out.
204
00:07:52,033 --> 00:07:53,600
I haven't got any money, have I?
205
00:07:53,700 --> 00:07:56,000
Well, you could get a job
like your little brother.
206
00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:58,600
I don't want to go back
to handing out flyers.
207
00:07:58,700 --> 00:08:01,167
I've got a degree now, and
technically I've still got
208
00:08:01,267 --> 00:08:02,567
six months of me year out left.
209
00:08:02,667 --> 00:08:03,967
Yeah.
210
00:08:04,067 --> 00:08:06,109
How many more of these years out
do you think you'll need, Meg?
211
00:08:06,133 --> 00:08:08,100
Haven't you had your fun now?
212
00:08:08,200 --> 00:08:10,600
India was a cultural,
educational experience, Dad.
213
00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:13,900
It wasn't just about
mucking around, having fun.
214
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:16,167
Yeah, I've seen the
bungee jumping video.
215
00:08:16,267 --> 00:08:18,500
I think you need to make a plan.
216
00:08:18,600 --> 00:08:20,100
I had a plan.
217
00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:24,200
Live here until I got a
cool, artsy media-y job.
218
00:08:24,300 --> 00:08:26,233
I can't live in a
wardrobe, can I?
219
00:08:26,333 --> 00:08:29,200
Yes, and we can't afford
to support you here anymore.
220
00:08:29,300 --> 00:08:32,267
Well, why didn't you just
sell one of these bags?
221
00:08:32,367 --> 00:08:34,633
That's a month's rent.
222
00:08:34,733 --> 00:08:35,600
Is it?
223
00:08:35,700 --> 00:08:37,900
She's joking.
224
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:39,400
She can sleep on the sofa.
225
00:08:39,500 --> 00:08:40,400
Oh, thanks.
226
00:08:40,500 --> 00:08:42,200
Fine, but she's paying rent.
227
00:08:42,300 --> 00:08:42,933
What?
228
00:08:43,033 --> 00:08:44,400
You're 24, Meg.
229
00:08:44,500 --> 00:08:46,600
It's time you started
acting like it.
230
00:08:46,700 --> 00:08:50,833
Well, whatevs.
I so totally am acting like it.
231
00:08:54,933 --> 00:08:55,833
Hi, roomie.
232
00:08:55,933 --> 00:08:57,533
I thought you'd gone, Mark.
233
00:08:57,633 --> 00:08:58,767
I waited for you.
234
00:08:58,867 --> 00:09:00,267
You really did, didn't you?
235
00:09:00,367 --> 00:09:02,867
Shall we go back
to our flat, Meg?
236
00:09:02,967 --> 00:09:03,800
Absolutely not.
237
00:09:03,900 --> 00:09:04,900
We're going pub.
238
00:09:04,933 --> 00:09:05,767
Are we?
239
00:09:05,867 --> 00:09:07,233
Not you.
240
00:09:07,333 --> 00:09:09,467
Look, I really just
need some space, Mark.
241
00:09:09,567 --> 00:09:10,400
Where are you going?
242
00:09:10,500 --> 00:09:11,200
I don't know.
243
00:09:11,300 --> 00:09:12,333
Do you want a lift?
244
00:09:12,433 --> 00:09:13,667
Yes.
245
00:09:20,667 --> 00:09:21,667
Put your foot down, Mark.
246
00:09:21,733 --> 00:09:23,633
I want to get there
before next summer.
247
00:09:23,733 --> 00:09:27,400
Sorry, but I'm transporting
something fragile and precious.
248
00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:28,333
What?
249
00:09:28,433 --> 00:09:29,067
Marble.
250
00:09:29,167 --> 00:09:30,900
No, Meg.
251
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,600
Right, we're getting out here.
252
00:09:37,067 --> 00:09:38,333
Wake up, Meg.
253
00:09:38,433 --> 00:09:41,367
I don't wear to wear
lost property, Sir.
254
00:09:41,467 --> 00:09:44,667
Maybe she should just
come back to our place now.
255
00:09:44,767 --> 00:09:47,467
Meg.
256
00:09:47,567 --> 00:09:50,967
Oh God, please tell
me this is a dream.
257
00:09:51,067 --> 00:09:53,567
Sort of more of
a nightmare, love.
258
00:09:53,667 --> 00:09:56,867
Shall I park the van
and meet you in there?
259
00:09:56,967 --> 00:09:58,133
Just go home, Mark.
260
00:09:58,233 --> 00:10:00,333
Nobody wants you here.
Thanks for the lift.
261
00:10:07,033 --> 00:10:10,000
Well, he's persistent,
I'll give him that.
262
00:10:10,100 --> 00:10:11,200
I can't get rid of him.
263
00:10:11,300 --> 00:10:12,633
He's like thrush.
264
00:10:12,733 --> 00:10:14,693
Yeah, well he definitely
needs clinical treatment.
265
00:10:14,733 --> 00:10:16,400
You need to eradicate.
266
00:10:16,500 --> 00:10:18,460
Do you want me to put a
word in with the universe?
267
00:10:18,533 --> 00:10:19,900
Fuck the universe.
268
00:10:20,000 --> 00:10:21,200
What's the matter, Meg?
269
00:10:21,300 --> 00:10:22,867
Are you upset because
you're homeless?
270
00:10:22,967 --> 00:10:24,067
Yes.
271
00:10:24,167 --> 00:10:25,067
And because your
mental ex-boyfriend
272
00:10:25,167 --> 00:10:25,833
wants you to move in with him?
273
00:10:25,933 --> 00:10:26,833
Yes.
274
00:10:26,933 --> 00:10:28,043
And because your unemployed?
275
00:10:28,067 --> 00:10:29,143
Hadn't actually
thought about that,
276
00:10:29,167 --> 00:10:30,633
but yes, also a huge problem.
277
00:10:30,733 --> 00:10:31,533
Thanks very much guys.
278
00:10:31,633 --> 00:10:32,733
Great chat.
279
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,600
I'll get our shots in.
280
00:10:39,567 --> 00:10:41,167
Done it.
Done it all.
281
00:10:41,267 --> 00:10:43,833
I'm out of ideas to be honest.
- Oh, I know.
282
00:10:43,933 --> 00:10:44,933
Bukake.
283
00:10:46,700 --> 00:10:48,633
Can't you just sent him
a picture of your boob?
284
00:10:48,733 --> 00:10:51,467
He's already got the
whole range, inside out.
285
00:10:51,567 --> 00:10:53,727
I just hate the idea of not
being dirty enough for him.
286
00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:55,743
Darling you don't you have
anything to worry about,
287
00:10:55,767 --> 00:10:57,233
you're absolutely filthy.
288
00:10:57,333 --> 00:10:58,233
Am I?
289
00:10:58,333 --> 00:11:01,700
Hey, seriously,
you're a total dirtbag.
290
00:11:01,800 --> 00:11:02,700
You are.
291
00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:03,633
Stop it.
292
00:11:03,733 --> 00:11:06,467
You'll give me a big head.
293
00:11:06,567 --> 00:11:08,000
Oh, hello.
294
00:11:08,100 --> 00:11:10,033
Mind if I watch?
295
00:11:10,133 --> 00:11:12,067
Malcolm.
296
00:11:12,167 --> 00:11:14,000
Thanks for coming
to my party, girls.
297
00:11:14,100 --> 00:11:15,867
Oh yeah, that's why we're here.
298
00:11:15,967 --> 00:11:17,667
Do I get a birthday kiss?
299
00:11:17,767 --> 00:11:19,167
No.
300
00:11:19,267 --> 00:11:20,867
This is my cousin, Bunny.
301
00:11:20,967 --> 00:11:22,300
Ah, Malcolm.
302
00:11:22,400 --> 00:11:24,043
Remember that, you'll
be screaming it later.
303
00:11:24,067 --> 00:11:26,933
Right, are you saying
you're going to rape her?
304
00:11:27,033 --> 00:11:29,233
No, just chatting her up.
305
00:11:29,333 --> 00:11:32,167
Well, you can see
we're all very aroused.
306
00:11:32,267 --> 00:11:34,533
Bunny, this is my boss, Malcolm.
307
00:11:34,633 --> 00:11:35,800
Uh, former boss.
308
00:11:35,900 --> 00:11:38,067
Got too big for it, didn't
you, Mrs. Qualifications.
309
00:11:38,167 --> 00:11:39,667
Yeah actually, about that.
310
00:11:39,767 --> 00:11:41,567
I thought you said you
had meningitis, Laura?
311
00:11:41,667 --> 00:11:42,500
Feel better now.
312
00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:43,633
I'll be back tomorrow.
313
00:11:43,733 --> 00:11:45,767
Good, because you were
promoting the all-new
314
00:11:45,867 --> 00:11:47,133
best-selling tranket.
315
00:11:47,233 --> 00:11:48,567
It's a travel slanket.
316
00:11:48,667 --> 00:11:51,700
That is far too many
made-up words in one sentence.
317
00:11:51,800 --> 00:11:53,133
What's made-up about tranket?
318
00:11:53,233 --> 00:11:55,209
It's travel plus slanket,
what's made-up about that?
319
00:11:55,233 --> 00:11:56,567
Uh, the slanket bit?
320
00:11:56,667 --> 00:11:58,600
Well that's just
blanket plus sleeve.
321
00:11:58,700 --> 00:11:59,933
I thought you had a degree?
322
00:12:00,033 --> 00:12:02,200
Fat load of good
that's doing you.
323
00:12:02,300 --> 00:12:04,733
Yeah, I meant to
ask, actually, Mark...
324
00:12:04,833 --> 00:12:06,009
Well, I've reserved
us a the table.
325
00:12:06,033 --> 00:12:08,667
Come join the party.
326
00:12:08,767 --> 00:12:11,633
You've met my mum, haven't you?
327
00:12:11,733 --> 00:12:12,533
Right.
328
00:12:12,633 --> 00:12:14,700
Gary is gagging for it.
329
00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:15,800
Get the drinks in.
330
00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:20,767
It's your round.
331
00:12:20,867 --> 00:12:21,767
Right.
332
00:12:21,867 --> 00:12:23,267
Can I borrow some cash?
333
00:12:23,367 --> 00:12:25,967
Why don't you just ask the
universe to get some drinks.
334
00:12:26,067 --> 00:12:27,367
Fine, I will, actually.
335
00:12:33,200 --> 00:12:34,267
- Hello?
- Gary?
336
00:12:34,367 --> 00:12:35,800
What are you doing?
337
00:12:35,900 --> 00:12:36,900
What's that noise?
338
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:38,767
Uh, It's One Born Every Minute.
339
00:12:38,867 --> 00:12:40,043
Gary, I know what you're doing,
340
00:12:40,067 --> 00:12:41,476
and you better start
fucking behaving
341
00:12:41,500 --> 00:12:44,267
yourself, because I am capable
of messing you right up.
342
00:12:44,367 --> 00:12:46,733
You'll be begging for my
forgiveness, you piece of dirt.
343
00:12:46,833 --> 00:12:48,100
Oh yes, Laura.
344
00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:50,267
I love it when you got angry.
345
00:12:50,367 --> 00:12:51,767
Do you?
346
00:12:51,867 --> 00:12:53,667
This turning you on?
347
00:12:53,767 --> 00:12:56,000
Malcolm.
348
00:12:56,100 --> 00:12:57,667
Happy birthday.
349
00:12:57,767 --> 00:12:59,067
Thank you.
350
00:12:59,167 --> 00:13:03,567
So I was wondering if I
could have my old job back?
351
00:13:03,667 --> 00:13:05,633
I thought you said this
work was demoralizing,
352
00:13:05,733 --> 00:13:07,167
underpaid, and humiliating.
353
00:13:07,267 --> 00:13:11,333
It is, and I would like to
do it full-time, if possible.
354
00:13:11,433 --> 00:13:13,309
You said you wouldn't do it
even if you were desperate,
355
00:13:13,333 --> 00:13:14,867
and that you'd rather starve.
356
00:13:14,967 --> 00:13:17,200
That doesn't sound like me.
357
00:13:17,300 --> 00:13:19,500
Well, then take it back.
358
00:13:19,600 --> 00:13:20,600
Oh, come on.
359
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:23,367
Take it back or I
can't take you back.
360
00:13:23,467 --> 00:13:27,300
OK, I'm sorry I said
it was demoralizing.
361
00:13:27,400 --> 00:13:28,467
It's not.
362
00:13:28,567 --> 00:13:29,400
It's...
363
00:13:29,500 --> 00:13:30,867
It's important.
364
00:13:30,967 --> 00:13:32,200
We're fueling the economy.
365
00:13:32,300 --> 00:13:36,467
Well... OK, we're
fueling the economy.
366
00:13:36,567 --> 00:13:40,167
It's important,
valuable work, and I
367
00:13:40,267 --> 00:13:43,067
would be lucky to work for you.
368
00:13:43,167 --> 00:13:44,600
What do you think?
369
00:13:44,700 --> 00:13:49,100
Right, well, I think that it
is actually not my decision,
370
00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:50,200
it's the area manager's.
371
00:13:50,300 --> 00:13:51,576
So you're going to
have to ask him.
372
00:13:51,600 --> 00:13:53,700
Fortunately for us all,
he is here somewhere.
373
00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:55,767
Right, what are you wearing?
374
00:13:55,867 --> 00:14:01,767
Do what I say, I'm in
charge, you dirty knobhead.
375
00:14:01,867 --> 00:14:03,933
Slide your trackies off.
376
00:14:04,033 --> 00:14:05,867
One Panty Dropper.
377
00:14:05,967 --> 00:14:07,433
Thank you, universe.
378
00:14:07,533 --> 00:14:09,443
I've just been bought a drink
and offered a job as a model.
379
00:14:09,467 --> 00:14:12,400
Who here has offered
you a modeling job?
380
00:14:12,500 --> 00:14:14,200
That guy.
381
00:14:14,300 --> 00:14:16,700
God, I told you I had a good
feeling about this summer.
382
00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:17,833
He's Nice.
383
00:14:17,933 --> 00:14:20,767
See, I am mystical as fuck, Meg.
384
00:14:20,867 --> 00:14:22,133
All my dreams are coming true.
385
00:14:22,233 --> 00:14:24,867
I've traveled the world,
got a job in showbiz,
386
00:14:24,967 --> 00:14:26,667
soon I really will
be mixed race.
387
00:14:26,767 --> 00:14:27,933
I love me.
388
00:14:28,033 --> 00:14:29,667
Meg, may I introduce
you to our new area
389
00:14:29,767 --> 00:14:31,467
manager, Josh Steel.
390
00:14:31,567 --> 00:14:32,867
Yes, you may.
391
00:14:32,967 --> 00:14:34,100
Hello.
392
00:14:34,200 --> 00:14:35,209
Malcolm this is Bunny,
she'll be joining
393
00:14:35,233 --> 00:14:36,433
you on the new tranket promo.
394
00:14:36,533 --> 00:14:37,367
What?
395
00:14:37,467 --> 00:14:38,100
What?
396
00:14:38,200 --> 00:14:39,467
No.
I'm a model.
397
00:14:39,567 --> 00:14:42,467
You said modeling.
- Yeah, modeling the tranket.
398
00:14:42,567 --> 00:14:45,200
Think of yourself as a
sort of human mannequin.
399
00:14:45,300 --> 00:14:46,933
Welcome to our world.
400
00:14:47,033 --> 00:14:47,933
Human mannequin.
401
00:14:48,033 --> 00:14:49,400
Showbiz.
402
00:14:49,500 --> 00:14:50,167
Drinks?
403
00:14:50,267 --> 00:14:52,167
Yes, please, I do.
404
00:14:52,267 --> 00:14:54,143
Don't forget, you need
to go and eradicate Mark.
405
00:14:54,167 --> 00:14:55,333
Sorry, what's that?
406
00:14:55,433 --> 00:14:57,300
I couldn't hear anything
over how fit he is.
407
00:14:57,400 --> 00:14:59,700
My turn to flirt my way
into a job offer, thanks.
408
00:14:59,800 --> 00:15:00,933
Don't mind if I do.
409
00:15:01,033 --> 00:15:03,000
Laters.
410
00:15:03,100 --> 00:15:05,067
We're going to do
now, in this toilet,
411
00:15:05,167 --> 00:15:08,667
like animals, because
all you're worth to me.
412
00:15:08,767 --> 00:15:10,367
Put your hand on your pants.
413
00:15:10,467 --> 00:15:12,267
Feels good, doesn't
it, you mong.
414
00:15:12,367 --> 00:15:14,667
I'll call you what I like,
because I'm getting nasty.
415
00:15:14,767 --> 00:15:17,633
Don't you speak no more,
I'll do the talking.
416
00:15:17,733 --> 00:15:21,800
I'm absolutely sick of your
winging, annoying voice.
417
00:15:21,900 --> 00:15:24,833
You speak really
slowly, like that.
418
00:15:24,933 --> 00:15:26,067
And you stink.
419
00:15:26,167 --> 00:15:27,676
You need a new
deodorant, it don't work.
420
00:15:27,700 --> 00:15:30,467
And you've got bad taste,
and you've got bad breath.
421
00:15:30,567 --> 00:15:31,400
You've got no muscles.
422
00:15:31,500 --> 00:15:32,900
And I hate that
mole on your neck,
423
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:34,500
and your ball hair's too long.
424
00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:36,009
And you've got shit
taste in clothes,
425
00:15:36,033 --> 00:15:38,067
and shit taste in music.
426
00:15:38,167 --> 00:15:39,933
And you're going
bald at the back.
427
00:15:40,033 --> 00:15:41,867
And you're lazy.
428
00:15:41,967 --> 00:15:45,167
What do you mean,
it's not sexy anymore.
429
00:15:45,267 --> 00:15:48,900
No, I'm hanging up.
430
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:52,933
Laura 1, internet 0.
431
00:15:58,533 --> 00:15:59,533
Another.
432
00:15:59,600 --> 00:16:00,600
Please.
433
00:16:00,633 --> 00:16:02,267
I'm quite drunk now.
434
00:16:02,367 --> 00:16:05,133
Bit jet-lagged I
think, actually.
435
00:16:05,233 --> 00:16:07,467
Promo's so much fun,
I really love it.
436
00:16:07,567 --> 00:16:10,500
Well, the tranket has
just been such a gift.
437
00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:12,567
I mean, it's such
a great product,
438
00:16:12,667 --> 00:16:15,967
and we have really
increased the sales figures.
439
00:16:16,067 --> 00:16:19,033
I mean JTL Promotions
are very impressed.
440
00:16:19,133 --> 00:16:21,533
And of course, Malcolm's
a great team leader.
441
00:16:21,633 --> 00:16:22,933
Is this a joke?
442
00:16:23,033 --> 00:16:24,400
I bet you just
get away with saying
443
00:16:24,500 --> 00:16:25,800
anything 'cause you're so fit.
444
00:16:25,900 --> 00:16:27,300
I think what the customer really
445
00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:31,000
enjoys is a fully
integrated, experiential
446
00:16:31,100 --> 00:16:32,400
marketing strategy.
447
00:16:32,500 --> 00:16:34,700
I mean, we really get people
talking about the brand,
448
00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:37,300
because the whole
promotion is an experience.
449
00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:41,700
Not to mention the social
media campaign that we've alr...
450
00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:43,633
Meg?
451
00:16:43,733 --> 00:16:44,867
Meg?
452
00:16:44,967 --> 00:16:45,967
Meg?
453
00:16:48,767 --> 00:16:49,600
I'll take it from here.
454
00:16:49,700 --> 00:16:50,767
Who are you?
455
00:16:50,867 --> 00:16:51,900
I'm her boyfriend.
456
00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:54,000
Ooh, come on, Meggles.
457
00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:55,900
Let's get you home.
458
00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:58,800
Shall I give you a hand?
459
00:17:00,967 --> 00:17:01,967
Fit.
460
00:17:04,867 --> 00:17:06,733
Sorry.
461
00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:29,800
Oopsie.
462
00:17:37,533 --> 00:17:41,000
What the hell are
you doing, Mark?
463
00:17:41,100 --> 00:17:42,367
Where's Meg?
464
00:17:42,467 --> 00:17:46,233
Oh, she fell asleep,
and then her boyfriend
465
00:17:46,333 --> 00:17:47,467
came to pick her up.
466
00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:49,967
Oh my God, he's
kidnapped her, the freak.
467
00:17:50,067 --> 00:17:51,767
Go.
468
00:17:51,867 --> 00:17:54,367
Are you breaking up with me?
469
00:17:54,467 --> 00:17:56,500
How can I break
up with you, Mark?
470
00:17:56,600 --> 00:17:57,633
We're not even together.
471
00:17:57,733 --> 00:17:59,500
I thought you were
just playing hard to get?
472
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:03,900
That's how you interpret
zero written or verbal contact
473
00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:05,467
for six months?
474
00:18:05,567 --> 00:18:08,333
So this relationship's
just a one-way-street, is it?
475
00:18:08,433 --> 00:18:12,300
It's fucking cul-de-sac, Mark?
476
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:14,700
But all your stuff's here now.
477
00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:23,000
I had it all dry cleaned.
478
00:18:29,133 --> 00:18:31,033
- Where's the rest?
- Upstairs.
479
00:18:31,133 --> 00:18:32,133
Upstairs?
480
00:18:42,033 --> 00:18:44,000
I honestly wouldn't
put it past him
481
00:18:44,100 --> 00:18:45,667
to do something really sick.
482
00:18:45,767 --> 00:18:48,267
Oh my God, this is all my fault.
483
00:18:48,367 --> 00:18:50,143
I asked the universe to end
it between them, but not
484
00:18:50,167 --> 00:18:51,300
like this.
485
00:18:51,400 --> 00:18:53,500
Poor Meg.
486
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:58,900
Oh, it's bigger than
you'd expect, isn't it?
487
00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:00,933
It's quite nice up here.
488
00:19:01,033 --> 00:19:02,533
Yeah.
489
00:19:02,633 --> 00:19:05,233
Well, it was going
to be our guest room.
490
00:19:05,333 --> 00:19:07,500
Well, you could get a housemate.
491
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:08,967
Could do.
492
00:19:09,067 --> 00:19:09,900
Saw a juicer downstairs.
493
00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:11,967
Yeah.
494
00:19:12,067 --> 00:19:15,600
So, where are you going to live?
495
00:19:15,700 --> 00:19:17,933
Don't know.
496
00:19:18,033 --> 00:19:19,313
Do you want to
get back together?
497
00:19:19,367 --> 00:19:20,367
No.-
498
00:19:20,433 --> 00:19:22,333
- Do you want to live here?
- Yes, please.
499
00:19:22,433 --> 00:19:25,967
But it's still over, Mark.
500
00:19:26,067 --> 00:19:28,033
Shall I make you a
summer fruit smoothie?
501
00:19:28,133 --> 00:19:29,133
Yes, please.
502
00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:35,167
It's way too quiet in there.
503
00:19:35,267 --> 00:19:38,500
What if he's killed her?
504
00:19:44,167 --> 00:19:46,767
Uh, Mark.
505
00:19:46,867 --> 00:19:48,000
Mark.
506
00:19:52,933 --> 00:19:54,800
I don't like the sound of that.
507
00:19:56,267 --> 00:19:57,467
I just want you back for good.
508
00:19:58,267 --> 00:19:59,376
Want you back, want you back.
509
00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:00,767
Mark?
510
00:20:00,867 --> 00:20:01,867
Mark.
511
00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:07,567
Whenever I'm wrong, just tell
me the song, and I'll sing it.
512
00:20:07,667 --> 00:20:08,900
Give me that.
513
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:10,667
Well, will the universe help us?
514
00:20:10,767 --> 00:20:11,767
In a way.
515
00:20:12,933 --> 00:20:16,933
Want you back, I want
you back for good.
516
00:20:17,033 --> 00:20:19,867
Unaware but underlined.
517
00:20:32,967 --> 00:20:35,100
Drop the knife or
I'll break your face.
518
00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:36,100
I haven't done anything.
519
00:20:36,200 --> 00:20:37,067
Where is she?
520
00:20:37,167 --> 00:20:37,967
In the loft.
521
00:20:38,067 --> 00:20:39,467
Oh, you sick bastard.
522
00:20:39,567 --> 00:20:40,967
She likes it up there.
523
00:20:41,067 --> 00:20:42,133
Help!
524
00:20:42,233 --> 00:20:44,567
Help me, I can't get out.
525
00:20:44,667 --> 00:20:46,433
Well, I didn't think
she was locked in up...
526
00:20:46,533 --> 00:20:47,800
Jesus Christ.
527
00:20:47,900 --> 00:20:49,833
Laura, what about my karma?
528
00:20:49,933 --> 00:20:52,200
Just keep him down.
529
00:20:52,300 --> 00:20:54,433
OK, I'm going to have
to sit on you, Mark, OK?
530
00:20:57,000 --> 00:20:59,167
Meg, it's Laura,
are you all right?
531
00:20:59,267 --> 00:21:00,867
Laura hi, yeah,
everything's fine.
532
00:21:00,967 --> 00:21:01,967
Hi, Meg.
533
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:02,900
Yeah, hello.
534
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:04,143
Can you just let me out, please?
535
00:21:04,167 --> 00:21:05,000
Right, how?
536
00:21:05,100 --> 00:21:06,300
I don't know, ask Mark.
537
00:21:06,400 --> 00:21:08,067
I can't, we're
not really talking.
538
00:21:08,167 --> 00:21:09,567
Why not?
539
00:21:09,667 --> 00:21:11,776
I sort of twatted him over
the head with a rock, like.
540
00:21:11,800 --> 00:21:12,933
It's a crystal.
541
00:21:13,033 --> 00:21:14,933
Oh, bloody hell, Laura.
542
00:21:15,033 --> 00:21:17,033
Mark, can you let
me out, please?
543
00:21:17,133 --> 00:21:19,300
I can't, Bunny's sitting on me.
544
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:23,533
I'm in quite a lot of pain,
but I'm confusing aroused.
545
00:21:23,633 --> 00:21:25,433
Oh!
546
00:21:25,533 --> 00:21:26,933
Hi guys.
547
00:21:27,033 --> 00:21:28,633
Are you OK, Mark?
548
00:21:28,733 --> 00:21:30,533
Meg, tell them.
549
00:21:30,633 --> 00:21:31,733
Everything's fine.
550
00:21:31,833 --> 00:21:33,967
He just put a blanket over
me, and I fell asleep.
551
00:21:34,067 --> 00:21:35,700
Like a beautiful budgie.
552
00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:37,333
Have you dumped the freak, then?
553
00:21:37,433 --> 00:21:38,067
I am here.
554
00:21:38,167 --> 00:21:39,467
Don't care.
555
00:21:39,567 --> 00:21:41,176
Yes, we've broken up
properly, haven't we, Mark.
556
00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:43,767
Yeah, for now.
557
00:21:43,867 --> 00:21:46,167
Right, well, let's go off, then.
558
00:21:46,267 --> 00:21:47,267
No.
559
00:21:47,333 --> 00:21:50,833
See the thing is, yes,
we split up, but...
560
00:21:50,933 --> 00:21:52,633
Actually I've already moved in.
561
00:21:52,733 --> 00:21:54,267
Shut the front door.
562
00:21:54,367 --> 00:21:56,533
Meg, did he, or did
he not convince himself
563
00:21:56,633 --> 00:21:58,667
he was in a relationship
with you, abduct
564
00:21:58,767 --> 00:22:00,433
you, and trap you in his loft.
565
00:22:00,533 --> 00:22:02,093
Yeah, he did all of
those things, but...
566
00:22:03,233 --> 00:22:05,067
Laura, please stop
hitting him with a rock.
567
00:22:05,167 --> 00:22:06,167
Crystal.
568
00:22:06,233 --> 00:22:07,033
I know this is.
569
00:22:07,133 --> 00:22:09,400
It's that Denmark Disease.
570
00:22:09,500 --> 00:22:10,967
I think you mean
Stockholm Syndrome.
571
00:22:11,067 --> 00:22:13,533
And no, I'm not in
love with my captor.
572
00:22:13,633 --> 00:22:15,800
I'm just using him
for somewhere to live.
573
00:22:15,900 --> 00:22:17,600
Meg, this is a terrible idea.
574
00:22:17,700 --> 00:22:18,833
It's one of your worst.
575
00:22:18,933 --> 00:22:20,167
He's got a juicer.
576
00:22:20,267 --> 00:22:21,267
How can you afford this?
577
00:22:21,367 --> 00:22:22,867
Aren't you meant
to be unemployed?
578
00:22:22,967 --> 00:22:24,800
Girlfriend's don't
have to pay rent.
579
00:22:24,900 --> 00:22:27,567
I'll be paying, Mark.
580
00:22:27,667 --> 00:22:29,267
All new Trankets.
581
00:22:29,367 --> 00:22:32,833
Detachable head rest and
comfort earplugs drown out
582
00:22:32,933 --> 00:22:33,933
the sound of the wife.
583
00:22:33,967 --> 00:22:35,533
Malcolm, you can't say that.
584
00:22:35,633 --> 00:22:38,100
Sorry, or civil partner.
585
00:22:39,567 --> 00:22:42,900
So, um, all the features
of a traditional blanket
586
00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:45,633
plus sleeves, but with
a blow-up headrest
587
00:22:45,733 --> 00:22:47,133
and eye mask attachment.
588
00:22:47,233 --> 00:22:51,067
70% polyester, very
sensual to the touch.
589
00:22:51,167 --> 00:22:52,600
Did you ask the universe to make
590
00:22:52,700 --> 00:22:53,776
you look like a massive twat?
591
00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:54,967
Am I pulling it off?
592
00:22:55,067 --> 00:22:57,667
It looks like a Jedi's
fucked a bush baby.
593
00:22:57,767 --> 00:22:59,033
In a hot way?
594
00:22:59,133 --> 00:23:01,633
I've got a really good
feeling about this summer.
595
00:23:27,833 --> 00:23:29,367
Bwark.
40125
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.