All language subtitles for Crazy Hong Kong - Les dieux sont tombés sur la tête 4 (1993)

I'd like to tell you a story that will
be passed down from generation to

generation in this small village.

It's the story of my Uncle Nixow.

He's a bushman. In fact, he's the
bushman.

Some said he must be crazy.

But he lives a simple, carefree life.

Free as the wind, free as the birds.

With happy, simple dreams.

Or to put it another way, this is his
idea of a good time.

By the way, only in our culture do
people rub dirt on themselves to get

Nixow is a tribal elder, the most
respected man in our village.

So, of course, he's got the best job.

And nothing works up an appetite like
getting to the root of a problem.

At lunchtime, mix our repairs to the
executive cafeteria for the Thursday

-your -own hoof -and -turf special.

But on that particular day, something
was very different.

Strange was going on in the bush.

Who are you?

Cut! What's going on? Cut, cut. Cut,
cut, cut, cut.

They were just shooting a television
commercial and Nick so accidentally got

the way.

Come on, Bob. You're the director.

Okay, everything's under control. Can we
have the camera over here, please? No,

no, no. Don't move. Keep the camera
there.

You're the boss.

Suddenly, something hit him on the head.

Oh, my God.

Sorry. Are you okay? It was strange and
yet somehow very familiar.

No, I'm okay. Go back to work.

Then Mixa found the bird.

Sorry,

I don't understand.

Take it.

Excuse me.

Shirley? Yeah?

We're ready to go. The camera's in
position.

Okay, I'm coming.

Okay. Is the camera right? Yep, we're
all ready.

You like it?

Yeah, we'll try to come up with it.

Okay, thank you.

Tall as a hamburger.

Joe.

Hello. Shirley speaking.

Yes, who?

Is that you, Jack?

Shit.

Not you, Shirley. How's everything in L
.A.? Great. How about you?

Everything's fine here. Shirley, when
are you going to finish that shoe? It's

costing me big bucks.

We shoot everything today.

When are you coming to Hong Kong?

Now, my boys here told me the latest
figures.

Seems that your little island of six
millions got the highest sale of the

burgers for head of population in this
whole entire world of six billions.

I got big expansion plans for your part
of the world, darling. That's why I

can't wait to make another visit to that
dynamo city of yours. What do they call

it? What is it? The Pearl, Pearl
something.

That's right. Pearl of the Orient.

I'll be over next week. Next week, huh?

It will be. I'll tell you how to order.
I don't know.

Okay. Let's shoot it.

Mixel brought his prize home to the
tribe. They celebrated his astonishing

late into the night.

Yeah,

there we go. We deserve this. I promise
you. To the Bushman.

The whole tribe got in on the fun and
partied all night long.

Until someone stopped to think of the
bird.

The poor thing was trapped inside the
bottle, or at least that's how they

thought. All they could think about was
how to get it out of there and back into

the sky where it belonged.

Everyone agreed, the bird must be set
free.

released. But how to do it?

Finally, my wise uncle told them, the
pretty lady put the bird in the bottle,

she must know how to get it out.

It's terrific.

Oh, great. I'm glad you had a good time.
Yeah.

Bob? Uh -huh? This spot's going to be a
hit.

No doubt about it. For you.

Oh, thank you. Thank you so much.

Oh.

Bye.

was the best tracker in our village.

If anyone could find the pretty lady, he
could.

My ticket.

Thank you, ma 'am. How long to
Johannesburg?

Oh, not very long. About an hour.

Thank you. In the basket.

Everything's ready.

Let's go.

No way, ma 'am. No, no, no.

Oh,

no. Not again.

Some days it just doesn't pay to get out
of your hut.

And so my uncle boarded the plane and
took his first flight as luggage.

John. Shirley.

What's up? I got the fax saying they
need me at the office immediately.

No, no, no, no. Don't confuse me. I'm
going to forget. Okay. Michael said I

should tell you to read the fax about
getting to the office for a big meeting

immediately and that you're coming in on
an airplane.

What do you mean coming in?

Is anyone home in there? I'm here. I've
arrived.

And now for the big question.

Concentrate now.

Where is my car?

It's up there.

No, no, my mistake.

It's over there.

Got the keys?

In there. No kidding.

I've got a return trunk and baggage
claim.

Pick it up. Try and get it right this
time.

Louie, this is the trunk with my
diamonds.

How do you know, Chewy? They all look
the same. When it comes to diamonds, I

smell them, trust me.

All right. No back.

Always left with left. Lift with your
legs. Bend at the knees.

Oh, my God.

What have they gotten here? A dead body?

Come on, Chewie. No time to stop her,
Eggroll.

Let's go.

Ow!

Huh? Who the hell are you?

What are you doing here?

It's a respectable hotel, sir. You have
to pick up all this garbage. Look at the

mess you've made here.

Come on, sir, pick it all up.

I haven't got all day, you know. Come
on, pick it up. Oh, Stewie, that little

guy's got our diamonds. Oh, you can
smell them, all right.

Oh,

my God.

He's going to use my diamonds to get on.

Don't worry. They only think it's that
pain. Turn out this way, will you? Come

on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on.
Come on. Come on. Come on.

Come on.

Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on.

Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come
on.

Come on. Come on. Come on.

Come on. Come on.

Come on.

Come on.

Now he had time to look around and
wonder, where in the world am I?

Look, Eddie Murphy.

Hi there.

Good morning.

What have you got for me?

Thank you.

Thanks.

What part of China do you come from?

What part of China do you come from?

You too.

Take him back to his girlfriend.

Tell her he's not to run around half
naked.

Next time, we'll bring charges.

Yes, sir.

Hello.

Hi, Jack.

Oh, hello, Mike. I just saw the rushes.
Is Shirley there? Hi, Jack.

Listen, Shirley, my boys are pretty
impressed. Now, they want to run this

worldwide, not just Hong Kong.

You got that?

Okay, now down to the nuts and bolts.
What's the latest on a number of

We've got 39 shops now.

You got how many?

39? 39? Did I hear 39?

Operator! Operator!

Operator!

Listen, what the hell is going on? We
had a game plan. That's 40, not 39. One

thing I learned after all these years,
never change the game plan. Now that's

40. It's not 39. It's not 41. It's 40.
Gentlemen, I'm glad we understand each

other. Mr. William, hi, this is Tony.
You remember me?

Oh, yeah, you're the brown nose.

We have 40 shops.

It's just a matter of getting rid of the
old tenant, that's all. All right,

well, get Shirley onto it and take no
prisoners. When I get to Hong Kong, I

expect to visit that number 40 outlet.
You got that?

Don't worry, Jack. I promise you
everything will be done by the time you

here on Monday. Bye, Jack. Bye -bye. See
you on Monday.

Grandma, we got us some shooting to do.

Tony, what's the problem here?

If we've got a lease, let's enforce it.

Now boot him out of there.

It's not a problem with the lease.

Someone's got a mother who's not getting
with the program.

My mother?

You bought my mother's shop when I was
in Africa?

Shirley, it was a decision of market
research.

Shit happens.

Shirley, your mom's shop is the perfect
location for a Malibu burger. You know

that. We've got demographics up the
wazoo.

Michael's seen them. Okay.

When's the damn lease up?

Right now.

In fact, the lease expired several
months ago.

Sorry, Shirley.

I didn't know the store belonged to your
mother.

I hope you can handle this for the sake
of our company.

We'll give her full compensation for
moving expenses.

Oh, how nice.

Tony. Do me a favor.

Let me break it to her. She's had the
business 17 years.

You've got my word on it.

Surely you've got a guest in leather
diapers.

Say what?

Jerk.

Let me put it to you this way, ma 'am.
What's short wears a loincloth and runs

in the street? Maybe him? A good one,
yeah, really.

Anyway, ma 'am, tell us, does he belong
here or not? And where is this Miss

Hearn, huh?

We're not going to walk around with him
like this all day. He looks kind of

funny in that. Get up.

Kind of embarrassing as well.

I don't know.

There she is, Miss Hong. Hey, what's up?

Guess what we found.

Yikes. What the hell are you doing here?

You win.

We found your little playmate naked,
jousting with traffic, ma 'am. So, do

want him back now?

Is that all right with you, ma 'am? Huh?
I don't know him.

You don't? But you just said hello to
him, though. Oh, come on. Yikes doesn't

mean hello.

Oh, you know him. Let's split.

You can't leave a man like that in an
office like this. Look, ma 'am, he was

wearing your I .D. tag. Where's God? How
do you know the guy?

Look, if you have a problem, then call
his consulate. Ivy, the consulate. All

right.

Would you do me a favor?

Please take him off my hands. I mean, we
went briefly. Look, ma 'am, he's here

now. It's your responsibility. Got a
problem? Then call someone.

Come on, we're out of here.

What do you got, Ivy?

It's a holiday. I got a pre -recorded
message.

I didn't have a lot of luck finding your
bag.

Did you try checking the airline?

The airline?

Of course the airline.

Exactly what are you using for brain?

Who's this guy? Your new boyfriend?

No, Mr.

Wiseguy. He's now your new assistant.

Welcome to the firm, old man.

Do you have any initial questions?

I agree,

but let's get that between ourselves,
okay?

Nice hairstyle. Where'd you get it, huh?

I don't know. I didn't get it.

Oh, I've gone there. Hey, come on. Meet
the gang.

This is Ivy.

By the way, I hear you have a fax for
me.

A fax?

Oh, sorry.

Cool. I'll make a copy.

Good news, Cheryl. There's been a
breakthrough on your missing trunk.

They've spotted a couple of sky cats.
They were dancing... around with your

panties on their heads.

Sounds promising, eh? Oh, just keep
looking.

Hey, John, I've got a meeting. You look
out for a little friend here.

It's quitting time.

Do it for me. I'll pay you overtime.

Okay? Okay.

Stick with me, pal.

Hmm.

Hey, Ivy, where did the new guy go?

The new guy!

No idea.

But you better find him.

Hi, baby.

Talking a pretty woman. No big job for a
clever hunter like Nick, Sal.

Except if the ground is moving.

Now, this smell is wonderful.

Well, I hate it. It makes me look like a
ripe pumpkin.

There's no public bathing allowed here.

Now, this one I like a lot better. It's
slimming on me.

But it's the same shirt, ma 'am. Ah, no
wonder it looks familiar.

It makes you look like a pumpkin.

Oh, oh.

Now, these ties are the latest rage.

Hmm, is this a clip -on? Oh, I don't
know how to ask the sales manager.

Jake! Why aren't you with John?

This time we find your boyfriend
molesting plastic birds.

Plastic birds?

Didn't we warn you already to keep this
guy out of the street?

I'm responsible?

Just keep your personal life indoors.
You got that? We gotta go.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

See ya.

This looks great.

You know, you really should be a fashion
model.

What do you think, Miss Holmes? Stylish,
no?

Hmm.

It's a look.

But even in these strange and wonderful
new surroundings, Nixow had to remind

himself why he had come. His mission, to
free the yellow bird.

But he could not make himself understood
to his beautiful hostess.

Funny how a man can travel a journey of
10 ,000 miles and still be separated by

a few small words.

Oh, Ivy, listen, I've ordered a cake.
Can you get John to pick it up? Okay,

Bye. I'll hang up. You first.

Okay, bye.

Bye. Hello, you still there? Okay, both
hang up on three.

One, two, three.

It had been a long time since Uncle
Nixow had seen rain.

No, no. Do you understand the concept of
rain? We don't want to get wet.

In Mixau's homeland, in our tribe, a
rainstorm was caused to rejoice, caused

celebration, and the whole tribe would
pass around the soap and the back

scrubber.

Something was going on up ahead.

A traffic accident.

It reminded Nixow of two bull rhinos
mating at a watering hole.

Only it smelled a lot better.

just me.

This is TV. Don't be afraid.

Wait, wait. Don't get scared until you
see the commercials.

Come on, get up.

Have a seat. Relax.

I'll fix dinner.

Yikes! Wait! Don't drink that. It's full
of fish poop.

Come with me.

Water.

Ice.

See?

You blimp. You drink any more and you'll
bust your loincloth.

That's enough. Come on.

Is that you, John?

No, it's June.

You forget your umbrella?

No, I forgot my umbrella.

Just give me the damn cake and come in.

Don't drip on the rug.

Hey!

Boy, it's good to see you.

How you doing?

Hey, uh, how come you're not wet from
the rain like me?

Oh, under the awning. I didn't do it
like that.

Of course, you're much thinner than I
am.

What's the move?

John! Yikes!

Yeah? What is this?

Your idea of a joke?

No, it's cake.

This is an ice cream cake.

I sent you out for a birthday cake. Does
this look like a birthday cake?

I'm a little hazy in the distinction,
sugar.

Birthday cakes aren't made of ice cream.

So, how do you like the cake?

Oh, great. I love it. My husband's going
to come home from work and find ice

cream soup for dinner.

Yikes!

So, now's maybe not the time to ask for
a raise.

Uh... Ice cream is ice cream. Birthday
cake is birthday cake.

Want some?

Come on.

Okay. The first thing to remember is to
eat the cake, not the spoon.

Watch me.

Wait,

wait, wait.

Let me go next, and then you go. Okay.

Okay, that's good. That's good. All
right. Now you go.

Okay. Then I go.

And then you go.

No, no, no, no, no, no. I don't get
enough of a bite. You get a bite, and I

a bite, okay?

Okay, wait.

Wait.

Where's the cake?

Oh, John.

Oh, Johnny.

If you want a job tomorrow, you better
get out of here right now.

Oh, yeah.

I myself would love to have a job
tomorrow.

How about you?

Hmm.

Get cleaned up before dinner, okay?

Sweetheart, is that you?

Mom.

What's wrong?

Oh, come on, don't cry.

Come in and tell your daughter all about
it.

Okay.

Okay, okay, out with it.

I'm the daughter, forcing your own
mother out on the street.

Let me get you a nice glass of water,
Ma.

Stupid company is trying to run me out
of business, those bastards.

They called me collect this morning.
They're giving me three days to get out

my store.

You're the one behind all this, aren't
you?

Betrayed by my own daughter.

Was the caller Tony Lee?

So you did ask them to throw me out of
the building on my ass?

No, Ma.

I would never use the word ass.

Why do I have to get a call from a
perfect stranger telling me I've been

evicted? Your senior staff and my
daughter, you should have told me months

You're right, Ma, but I was in Africa. I
got back a little while ago. I'll try

to fix it. You know I will.

I hope so. Your father, God rest his
soul, is rolling over in his grave.

Shirley, how are you and your husband
getting along?

Oh, we're doing fine.

We're having a candlelit dinner.

Oh, really?

Yes. Shirley, everyone knows he has a
mister.

You must be strong.

A woman must be like a willow.

Resilient enough to bend with the
breeze, yet strong enough... Stop it,

Shirley, is there some little personal
problem you'd like to get off your

All right, that's it, Ma.

Let's just talk about the shop.

Suppose I can get us a buyout deal.
Would you think about relocating then?

It's not about money, Shirley.

It's a matter of principle.

Your father and I started the store 17
years ago. We worked hard to build it

and it always provided the family with a
good source of income, and then you

went to the university.

It's getting late. I've got to go.
Thanks for coming. Bye -bye. I'll call

tomorrow.

Yay. Shirley, you listen to Mama.

One night of passion does not a romance
make.

Trust me. Trust me, hon.

You lost the diamond. Well, how's it my
fault?

I chew of an egg roll. Well, let's go
then. Ow!

Hi there. Shirley here.

I'm going to be a little late for the
meeting.

Keep it going. I should be there in
about a half hour.

I don't know, but make him wait.

Okay? Bye -bye.

What are you doing?

Something wrong?

Look,

I've got a busy day.

Just stay with me. Let's go.

Just shut up!

Just give me ten minutes and I'll try to
get you your money, your dental, your

401k program.

Yay!

Bill.

I want to know right now what the hell's
going on with this company. Your

husband's run off with the company's
money and we're bankrupt.

There wasn't much Uncle Nick's house
could do to help.

But what a fine opportunity to sample
the local produce.

How was Nixau to understand all the
confusion?

In our tribe, there are no such things
as labor problems.

All Nixau knew for sure was that his new
friend was having trouble with the

people that made the bouncing fruit.

I'm on my way to DMC.

Maybe they'll take him back.

Then I'm meeting Winnie.

I've got other problems.

Bye -bye.

Thank you.

to tell you I was having a rough day.
Could you please just sit here quietly

just behave yourself?

Hey, Shirley.

Hey, Winnie.

How come you're late?

Where'd you find him? What a hunk, eh?

Are you listening to me?

Winnie, you haven't heard one word I've
said.

Of course I have. Your husband's gone
and your company is short of money and

bank is forcing you to pay your
husband's debts.

If you don't pay soon, they'll repossess
your car and house, and your company

plans to throw your mother out of her
store.

Fine.

Here, take some Kleenex. Do yourself a
favor. Take a deep breath, sit yourself

down, and have yourself a really, really
good cry.

Now tell me, how much do you owe? Way
too much, Wynn. Come off it. We're

supposed to be best friends.

My boyfriend's rich.

And as you well know, he's never, ever
said...

No to me.

Come on, don't worry.

Could you lend me half a million?

Half a million?

I can't do that.

How about a million?

But, Winnie.

No problem. Come on.

But just hold it till tomorrow, okay?

I think we've covered every inch of this
city. Like searching for a worm in a

noodle factory.

Look, there he is.

Oh, there you are, my little friend.

Oh, Chewie, get me out of here.

Oh, my arm.

Okay, all right, I got you. I got you
now.

Get up, Chewie.

You look like a beach whale in a leisure
suit. Come on, let's go.

I'm not paying for that.

Oh, everything is dark.

You're wearing sunglasses.

Let go.

Wait. This way. Come on. Hey.

Stop that guy in the bathroom. Come back
here. Come back here. Come on.

Easy for you to say.

Don't damage the wicker.

Now you're going to be ticked.

I think we got him now. Hang on, hang
on, hang on. Here we go, here we go,

we go.

Right here.

Oh, got him, right? Hang on.

Are you calling me fat? Wait a minute.

Hey, look at this guy get trapped.

Come on.

I'm going to stop it, you little. Come
over here. Come back here, you.

Come back here. Oh, when I get my hands
on you.

I'll get him, I'll get him. I'm going to
get him ready.

Yeah, ready? One, two, three, four.

I'm going to kill you. If you want to
know about men, I'll tell you about it.

All men are alike.

Gondoliers or lumberjacks.

One will use a sweet voice to sing his
way into your heart, while the other

don a big red shirt and use every trick
and cut you down. Which one is your

husband?

Well, my husband's a little different.

He took his mistress.

cleaned out the bank account and left
the damn country.

To hell with them.

Look, Cheryl, the important thing is
that we're both women.

And women are like willow trees.

We've got to bend in the wind, yet be
strong enough to withstand.

Here's another approach. You might want
to pray to the gods.

Good idea.

Call me tomorrow.

What's with you? Why are you so wet all
over?

scoot over your friend's way cool so
tell me does he dance as good

as he looks how should i know i gotta
get into the car to go over there and

back to work bye -bye okay

Ask Ivy to come into the meeting.

Hey, Shirley's called us big shots in
for an emergency meeting.

A what?

Emergency meeting.

So what did you find out from the agent?

He said they aren't able to sell the
shop upstairs.

What about renting it? I didn't ask him.
You didn't ask him?

What's the matter with you? Don't you
understand? My mother has this door

downstairs. I don't have to throw her
out if we can get the upstairs business

from Malibu Burger.

So if we put the new burger shop
upstairs, the serving area is twice as

And we can put in nice big glass windows
and paint the walls nice bright colors

and we'll really do the place up right.

It'll have great visibility.

Yikes!

What's he doing out there?

John? Yes?

Take care of him, will you?

I'm off duty now.

I'll pay you over time. Take him out and
show him a good time.

What do I use for money?

Have you ever heard the word
reimbursement? Oh, sure, but can I get

back? Just bring him back to my mom's
door by 11.

It's called bamboo fish. They take a
fish and put it inside the bamboo.

No, you eat the fish, not the bamboo.

Well, your wife has a recipe too, huh?
Come on, I'll show you more.

He eats the fish raw, too.

There's a good one over there. Oh,
actually, that one's swimming upside

So what's with the upside down one?

Special fish.

He's missing both fins and not moving
very much.

Neat, huh?

Neat, huh? It's stuck to the bottom of
the tank and it's covered with twine.

A rare delicacy.

Please, don't do that.

No, you can't shoot the salesman.

Look, I'm telling you, you can't shoot
the salesman. Unless you give him a

running start.

You gotta give him a running start, get
it?

Thanks for running with me. Kill me.

No.

No tie.

No shoe.

Coming. Back.

No. No.

Hey, don't let that sultan get to you,
okay, pal?

Hey, don't use that kind of language
around me.

Boy, I never sometimes.

Shoes.

Tie.

No problem.

Let's go, my brother.

Go on, eat it.

Put a hair on your chest.

Okay.

You got it.

This is an Africa.

Relax. It's okay. Have some sake. Wash
it down. That's it.

Good, huh?

Nothing like a little raw fish.

Sushi. Go ahead.

Thank you.

How many light bulbs in Hong Kong? Oh,
about 43 ,603.

Oh, yeah? Count them yourself.

You did?

Mom, you've got to get with the times.

This isn't much of a business nowadays.

Look around you. This isn't what people
want.

Past foods, the future.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I've heard
all that before. If I'd listened to

that story 20 years ago, you wouldn't
have afforded your college.

I've seen it all. Believe me, double
cheeseburgers, pizza parlors, and frozen

yogurt.

And let me just say, I'm still here and
they're not.

I know it isn't easy, Mom.

But why don't we just take the
compensation they're offering and move?

this we stuff all of a sudden? That's a
first for you, isn't it? Before this,

you were always the perfect company
girl, always taking their side. What

me? What about me, your own mother who
raised you? Thank God your sated father

never lived to see this day. Mom, would
you just listen to me a second?

Those foreign bosses don't give a damn
about you. The first time you fail,

you're out on your ass.

And Shirley, as long as we're talking,
if you looked after your husband as well

as you look after your job, you'd have a
home life.

Come on, Shirley. Are you going to think
only of yourself or are you going to

help out your dear sweet mother?

Time for you to choose.

Hey, don't slip the merchandise, all
right? Let's go.

Hey, Cheryl.

What do you think, huh?

You're just in time for dinner.

Did you do this to him?

He likes it. It's a whole ensemble here.
What do you think?

Oh, basic black. Very practical.

What? Go on, make yourself at home.

Ma, you said... Maybe this isn't the
best time to have a casual dinner thing.

We'll come back.

You said the two? Some kind of mother
-daughter problem thing?

Maybe you want to buy a duck?

No, no, no, no, no.

That's a preserved duck.

Don't touch that. Don't touch that.

Look, will you just trust me on this
one, will you?

Hey,

look, come here.

All right?

Take a good look at that, will you?

I don't even know why you followed me.

All I know is... All I know is you're
the only one who stands by me.

I can't believe trained professionals
like us can't catch a bum like this.

There's more to him than meets the eye.
Oh, my face. Look what he did to my

face. When I find him, I'm going to kill
him.

Oh, your face.

It's not a face. It's a pillow with
eyes.

My urine sample.

Jenny. Ready?

Great. Am I glad to see you.

Do me a favor, will you? Keep an eye on
him for me, and if you take him out, put

some clothes on him, okay?

No problem. Bye.

Hi.

Remember me?

True, Potter.

Yeah.

You could say that.

Okay. Did you finish?

Done.

Come on, let's go.

Okay? Okay.

Let's get dressed.

Dress up.

Right?

What's wrong?

Uncomfortable? Forget it.

Let's go.

Uncle had never had it so good. Now
another beautiful lady was interested in

him.

Here, honey, honey. Here.

Get down, okay?

That's it.

Now, put your butt over here. Put your
leg up. Put your leg up there.

Okay. That's good. That's good.

Uncle preferred the feel of the wind in
his hair.

Joe! Hey, Joe, you got what I ordered?

Sure, put it in the oven.

Thanks.

I don't understand, Fran.

Get the road jacket. Don't you come back
no more, no more, eh?

Get lost, you bird molester.

He's a nice pussycat.

Go find your own. Go on. Go on. Scat.
Scat.

Uncle Nix, I could not understand why
these people kept putting all their

animals in cages.

Only one thing to do.

Bird! Those are my birds! Oh, please!

Don't worry,

don't worry!

Shut up!

Eight sparrows at five dollars?

This is Hong Kong, as far as the eye can
see.

Look right over there.

You see that building over there?

The one with the spire on top?

That one?

It's my boyfriend's office.

Get it?

My boyfriend.

Works over there.

Right over there.

You know, with a big family.

You know, a wife with kids.

Then you have baby.

You know, baby.

Baby. Baby.

Baby.

Come in.

Whoa,

you're a dud.

I'm just thinking about it.

Me? I want baby.

We've talked about it.

My boyfriend and I want to have babies.

Someday, maybe.

He wants to immigrate first.

I guess he has a point there.

Until then, I guess, you know, we've got
to be patient.

Where the hell is that temple? I know
they put it around here somewhere.

I'm sure we've got to find my ass.

Hey, mister, have you seen a temple
around here anywhere?

I haven't seen anything in ten years,
but here's my best advice for you. Go to

-Eleven, make a ride to McDonald's, and
you can't miss it.

Thank you.

Thank you very much. Can I help you
across the street? Oh, yeah.

I'm having trouble remembering things
these days. I mean, sometimes I can't

remember my own telephone number.
Really? Oh, me too.

What did you say?

Me? I didn't say anything.

I didn't say anything. It was you doing
all the talking. No way.

I didn't say anything at all.

Get out of here. I can't take the word
of a beggar. Beggar?

Who are you calling a beggar?

I sing for a living, like Michael
Jackson.

Like Miller and... So you're saying he's
a beggar?

Who would have guessed that?

Where am I going?

My name is John.

What is it?

What's this action, Winnie?

I was just taking some photographs.

Where's the coat?

Back home. What did you do that for?

Felt like it. Geez, he didn't like it
anyway.

It was too itchy.

How do you know what makes him itchy?

You wear clothes and you're not itchy.
And what about catching cold?

What if this guy sneezes? He's probably
never seen a Kleenex in his life.

I'm sorry, but I didn't think about
that.

Well, what were you thinking then?

You have to think about his feelings,
too.

See what I mean?

Sorry.

Oh, try explaining sorry to him
sometime.

Was there no end to the beautiful and
unusual things that Nixel was seeing and

touching for the first time?

Or was it just a stupid painting?

But one thing was very certain.

Everything was new, even the ground that
moved.

Oh, Winnie, did you see where he went?

Smells good.

Not fresh air, but it's something
familiar.

Finally, someone who speaks his

language.

You again.

Good Lord, you do turn up in the most
extraordinary places, don't you?

Key break? Yeah.

Biscuit? Never mind.

Well, you know, we do have a hard time
of it, don't we?

Chinese on the one side, Chinese on the
other. I think we Gwylers deserve a

medal.

Quite right.

I say, is this some sort of native bow
and arrow?

Yes, it is, isn't it?

Do you think I could have a try?

Good.

Right.

Sorry,

let's see.

The 12 -bit, I think, to the left.

Oh, right, right, right.

A jam?

Energy makes me feel young. It's just
like the good old early days in the USA.

Don't believe everything they say about
this place, Jack.

Oh, yeah?

Well, anyway, I'm glad we had the
opportunity to have this little chat

the meeting, then.

You are a member of the family, aren't
you, Shirley, right?

And you have solved that number 40
outlet for me.

You know one thing...

When she gunned down my grandpa and that
is business, it's business. Now, you

get that number 40 outlet for me. Honey,
the sky's the limit. You write your own

ticket.

Now, what do you say?

Come take me to number 40.

I'll take you there tomorrow.

What a view.

Before Hong Kong, Uncle Nick saw it only
seen the dry desert landscape that

surrounded his bush village.

Where wonders never cease.

Imagine. Water.

Precious water as far as the eye could
see.

Good news. Enough water to last forever.

It's okay.

Back home at last.

But where were the kids?

His

darling,

loving wife. How my uncle longed to see
her face again.

Oh, to be back with the loving children
again.

Thank goodness it was only a dream.

I wonder what Sigmund Freud would have
to say.

Not a bad place to open a roast duck
restaurant here.

Help me, please. Sit here. On the towel.

Way to go. Way to go.

Get the hell out of me. I don't have any
insurance.

Hey, who's driving?

Where are you from?

Where are you from?

Hey,

which way are you going?

Hey, I'm going into a...

No, no, I think it's all yours.

I'm happy.

I'm thriving.

Well? Well?

Wanna go again?

mess you've gotten me into.

Winnie, what the hell's the matter with
you? What am I supposed to do now?

I was counting on your money. Why'd you
promise me if you couldn't deliver you?

Blake! They've towed my car and they're
taking my stuff!

Winnie,

do me a personal favor, huh?

Don't ever mention that Willow thing
again.

Cheryl, I can't believe it.

Go home, Winnie.

Forget him. It's painful, but you'll
soon get over it.

It's payback time! Wait, Winnie, Winnie.

Please don't act so foolishly.

You'll be my friend, right?

You'll stay with me, right?

Even though I got nothing?

Of course.

You know you can count on me.

Okay?

Bye -bye.

You, I'm not done with you yet. Where
were you last night? I was worried sick.

Oh, don't give me those doe eyes.

It's not like you know your way around
here.

Avon calling.

Yes? May I help you? Get out of the way.

There he is. Come on.

What do you know?

Open up, you little... This way.

Oh, my sternum. I've got to hurry. Come
here, you. Come on.

Wait a minute. Get around this way. Wait
a minute.

Get out of here. Wait. Come on.

Hey, who are these guys?

Get off him!

Are you all

right?

Careful, careful.

I've got to get these shoes refilled in.
I'm not flipping here.

Don't fall.

Oh, over there. Check it out with the
bump. I'll get the guy.

Look out.

He's running again.

What are you going to do? I don't know.
We're only going...

I got something here. I got some jewels.
Wait a minute. That's not the right

jewel there. Wait a minute.

Hong Kong is really a beautiful place,
but it seems like there's nothing here

for me anymore.

Where did you meet those guys anyway?

You know, we're really lucky.

They could have sliced us up like lunch
meat.

Michael, I'm on my way in.

Too late. They've already left for shop
40.

So this is shop number 40. That's right,
it is.

Charlie,

good to see you.

I'm ready. Be here.

Oh, the favorite gal.

Well, you got the deets to number 40
here?

What is this, some kind of Chinese joke?

Business is business, and my ma's
business is my family.

Now what the hell's going on?

My letter of resignation.

I always hated Malibu burgers.

Too much grief.

And nothing personal, Jack.

Why, you ungrateful son of a gun. I'm
going to get this door, and nobody's

mama's going to stand in my way.

It's all right. I'll take care of you
later.

Nobody's mama's going to stand in my
way.

Look at this filthy food. Look at this.
What is this? This is unhygienic.

One thing you've got to get straight.

Manicou Burger's been here to stay.

It's American, it's wholesome, and it's
going to take over the world.

Jack, let me help, please.

I like your style.

What part of China are you from, anyway?

Oh, cool it. I am not late until the big
hand says 12.

Very sorry, okay?

But the big news is I have been
promoted.

Well, thanks for the congratulations.
You know, it's not easy climbing to the

top of the ladder these days. You know,
kids.

I'd love to talk about it, but I've got
to get back, okay? I'll talk to you

soon, though.

I know.

I know, I know. I feel the same way,
too. We're friends, and I'm going to

you, too.

Here, take my business card. That's my
name and telephone number. And you can

also fax me if that's more convenient
for you, if you want.

Don't you dare call collect. Don't be a
cheapskate, huh?

Let me get your card, too.

You know, you never know what I might be
passing through your neighborhood. I

could drop on by or something.

drawing a map.

You are brilliant. I would never have
thought of that.

Do I rent a car or can I walk there?

You mean there's no taxi?

You mean there isn't any other way to
get there?

Oh, I see.

Tell me, tell me, did they build a
subway?

Oh, the desert, huh?

Big apes.

Big apes?

You got gorillas?

They eat human beings?

No, they just bite you.

Go down the hill.

Megaderms.

Megaderms. Oh, I love elephants. They
live with me. Are there any crocodiles?

Huh?

Okay, look, I really gotta get back to
the office now. Here, don't lose my car.

You got it. And I'll carry it with me
always. And I won't lose it, so don't

worry about that.

Take care.

Goodbye.

It seemed like Nixow had been away from
our little village forever.

But as I woke up that morning, not so
many years ago, I still remember now how

happy he looked as he walked toward us.

He had freed the bird from the bottle
and seen many things, like the colorful

metal animals with wheels that could
make a sound like a wounded hippo. But

most wondrous of all, Nixow would always
say, the people of this distant land,

and that they were the same, the same as
you and I, inside where it counts.

Why'd you lie to me? You told me I
couldn't get here by taxi.

Well, you should try taking a taxi
sometime.

Why am I here? Well, very simple. After
I got promoted, the competition and the

pressure became too much, and I just
couldn't take it anymore. You know how

is sometimes.

I got big plans for us, pal.

Hurry up, will you? Come on. What took
you so long? Come on. Let's get to work

here. Can we take this snake now,
please?

look good enough to eat.

What?

We can't make change for this.

This one's for free.

What did I tell you about being such a
cheapskate?

Be a little generous to our customers.
Look at all of them. Look at the line.

It takes months to make a customer and
only seconds to lose one.

That's the spirit.

I don't know. I'm not sure if the
leather loincloth look is really me.

So, how much longer until we get to the
next village, huh?

We're almost there. You're always saying
we're almost there. What about when we

were going to those mud huts and you
said, we're almost there? We walk for

more weeks.

You mean I got to go walk across that
lane? You got to be pulling my chain.

Oh, you can't go across that. Oh, Will,
that looks different than a man.